INT-WIS Fumble Tables

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  • 7/31/2019 INT-WIS Fumble Tables


    INT-WIS Fumble Tables

    INT-WIS Fumble Tables

    By Chris M. Robert

    Roleplaying character INT and

    WIS has become a forgotten art

    many characters simplydefault to the intelligence and

    wisdom of their controllingplayers. This is particularly

    noticeable when the ability

    scores in question are painfully

    low (i.e. in the 3-8 range). Too

    many dimwitted Fighters and

    foolhardy Thieves behave with

    the conspicuous rationality and

    deliberate forethought that is the

    product of a 21st century

    university education.

    The following tables allow LLs

    to model the effects of

    dangerously low INT and WIS

    scores. They can be used to

    force the hand of players who

    refuse to diligently roleplay, to

    punish players who fail to amusethe LL and provide an enjoyable

    adventure, or simply to inject

    some whimsy and randomness

    into a stale session.

    For the combat tables, roll at thebeginning of a combat. For the

    miscellaneous tables, you mayroll at any time. Some effects

    are of a delayed nature and

    require a trigger; you may want

    to write the effect down on a

    small scrap of paper, and then

    reveal it when the triggering

    action takes place. All combat

    fumbles last for the duration of

    the current combat, unless stated


    Feel free to choose any

    mechanic to enact these effects

    as you see fit. You might use

    increments of two hours of game

    time. If the player does notsatisfactorily roleplay the effects

    of low INT or WIS at least onceduring that time, set aside a

    token; for every two tokens, you

    may roll on the tables once (your

    choice of combat or

    miscellaneous). It is suggested

    that you enact only one effect at

    a time, regardless of how many

    tokens have been stockpiled.

    Surplus instances of good

    roleplaying should earn the

    removal of a token.

    Or, you can just roll away

    whenever the hell you feel like


    Many of the results are an

    inconvenience, but some will bedamaging and potentially fatal.

    Low-level characters face

    particular danger, but pinheads

    such as these should expect no

    less from the dangerous and

    inhospitable world of the fantasyadventurer. Of course the Gods

    look after idiots and children,and sometimes these ninnies

    might just end up saving the day

    with their blundering!

    Although these tables were

    created withLabyrinth Lordand

    old school Dungeons &

    Dragons in mind, with a little

    math and common sense they

    can easily be ported to any gamesystem, so please feel free to


    d12 INT CombatFumble Name

    INT Combat Fumble Effect

    1 BONK-BONK OnThe Head!!!

    The PC will make no attacks except for head-butts. Roto hit as normal a successful hit will render the enemunconscious for 2d4 rounds, regardless of size, helmet


  • 7/31/2019 INT-WIS Fumble Tables


    INT-WIS Fumble Tables

    insubstantiality, undead immunities, etc. Threesuccessful head-butts will also render the PCunconscious for 2d4 rounds.

    2 Its A Whammer! The PC spies a pretty dope looking club on the floor animmediately discards his current weapon in favor of thWhammer. After three hits, the club will break and thPC may take up any available weapon.

    3 WTF?!?!? The PC throws all of his melee weapons at the nearestenemy each hits on a roll of 20 only, doing d3 damagper hit. Thrown weapons may only be recovered aftercombat. If the PC has no melee weapons, he chargesheadfirst into the nearest wall and suffers d4 damage.

    4 Buckles, StrapsMe Confused...?

    The PC has put on his armor incorrectly penalize AC +2. Re-roll if the PC is not wearing armor.

    5 SON OF A - ?!?!? The next melee attack by the PC that misses theintended target automatically hits the PC for doubledamage.

    6 GOTCHA!!! Oh, er,Sorry!

    The next melee attack by the PC that misses theintended target automatically hits the nearest ally for

    double damage.7 ArrrOOOOOO!!! The PC emits an ululating battle cry that is one partintimidating and three parts crazyweird, and a nearbythird party drops in to investigate roll on the WanderMonster Table. There is an equal chance the newarrivals will fight for the party or against them. If they

    join the party, they will remain loyal for the remainderthe adventure.

    8 Them Magicals IsDangerous!

    The PC will refuse to have anything to do with magic. will discard all magic items (including potions check fbreakage of fragile containers), forego spellcasting, anrefuse magical aid of any sort. He will stay as far aspossible from magic using enemies, and immediatelyattack any allies who try to target him with a spell ormagical effect (including healing and the like).

    9 By The Lords OfLight

    You cant very well go into battle without the Gods onyour side, and thats gonna take a good prayer! The Pwill be oblivious to all that is around him (count asstunned) for 2d4 rounds while he gets his spiritual affain order.

    10 Abra-Ca-Pocus! Despite all evidence to the contrary, the PC thinks thespent arrow he found on the floor is actually a Wand oPolymorphing. The PC may check vs. INT once percombat round until a check is passed, the PC counts stunned. Allow a +2 bonus to INT for each ally whoforgoes all other activity to help convince the PC that hwand is bogus.

    11 Look At All TheSparklies!

    The PC will ignore the dangers of ongoing combat inorder to collect booty. Any time an enemy is killed byanyone in this combat, the PC must spend d6 combatrounds looting the body. During this time, he will makno attacks unless he is attacked first.

    12 Tick-Tick-BOOM!!! What self-respecting chickenhead doesnt have thecapacity to go absolutely batshit nuts every now andthen? Glazed eyes and a delicate ribbon of droolannounce to the world that its clobberin time the PC


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    INT-WIS Fumble Tables

    receives bonuses of +3 to hit and +6 to damage, isimmune to all psychological effects (including magicaland will attack every round until all enemies are killed

    d12 INT Misc. FumbleName

    INT Misc. Fumble Effect

    1 Its A Trap!!! The PC will activate any trap he comes within 20 feet ofor the next d20 turns. Reduce damage by half, but anrequired saves will be automatically passed.

    2 Zicke Zacke ZickeZacke - Hoi HoiHoi!!!

    Its Happy Hour somewhere! The PC has gotten drunkand suffers a 3 penalty to all rolls until he gets six houof uninterrupted sleep. Additionally, roll on theWandering Monster Table not twice but thrice! as oftenwhile the PC is drunk.

    3 Ouch!!! Fire Hurt! The PC brushes against a torch and demonstrates thecombustibility of unwashed hair. Suffer 1hp damage,and 1 penalty to all rolls until 1hp is healed. Re-roll ifno torches are present.

    4 I Got A HankerinTo Swim. The PC will dive into the next pool or stream the partyencounters, regardless of any discouragingcircumstances (lava, Dragon Turtle, huge whirlpool, et

    Test for drowning per encumbrance as normal.

    5 Easy Come, EasyGo

    25% of the total coins the PC is currently carrying areimmediately lost. If the PC has no coins, lose a randomweapon instead.

    6 Me Hates BeingAlone!

    The PC turns his back on the party for a moment andthinks hes been abandoned. His terrified shrieks attraan unwanted visitor roll on the Wandering Monster

    Table.7 Special Forces

    Needs Special


    The PC becomes convinced that he is aRanger/Ninja/Delta Orc and will scout ahead, utilize

    cover and camouflage, and generally look like an idiotFor the next 4d6 hours, anytime a Wandering Monsterencountered, roll d6: 1-3) the monsters arrive atmaximum number, and the party automatically countsas surprised 4-6) the PCs may choose their opponentfrom the Wandering Monster Table, as well as thenumber encountered, and the monsters automaticallycount as surprised the PC and his party roll for initiatas normal.

    8 I Didnt Need ThatAnyway

    Uh-oh! The PC set aside his backpack at the last reststop, and now its lost and gone forever, along withwhatever might have been in it. If the PC has nobackpack, lose all armor (including shield) instead.

    9 I Hate ThatDoor. The PC will refuse to cross through the next door that party finds. The party can either render him unconscioand carry him through, or find another route.

    10 Whats OverHere?

    The PC wanders off and becomes separated from thegroup. Regardless of whether the party stays put ormoves on, the PC will find them and reappear 5d6 turnlater having found 13cp, a red feather, and a small bagof sand.

    11 Me TummysGrumblin!

    The PC has been carelessly eating while the partytravels, leaving a trail of crumbs and spills behind him


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    INT-WIS Fumble Tables

    roll on the Wandering Monster Table to see what hasfollowed the trail.

    12 Just Doin MyThing

    The PCs clueless bumbling is damn near hypnotic. Fothe next d6 hours, all enemies automatically count assurprised for the first two rounds the PC and his partyroll for initiative as normal.

    d12 WIS CombatFumble Name

    WIS Combat Fumble Effect

    1 Its A Rout! RunFor Your Lives!!!

    Play after the PC or an ally suffers a wound. The PC wimmediately drop anything held in hand and flee donmake any extra rolls for attacks or anything, hes justgone! If the party survives, regardless of whether theystay put or move on, the PC will find them and reappea5d6 turns later. If the party is wiped out, the PCreappears with 1hp, in the nearest town, 2d6 days lateturns out he was right!

    2 Wrong Place,Wrong Time.

    The PC will automatically suffer the full applicable effeof any magic that contains the words radius ordiameter in its description, regardless of where he isand whether it is cast by an ally or an enemy.

    3 He Hates TheseCans!

    Following any enemy missile fire, the PC will immediathide behind the nearest cover for d2 rounds count hias stunned if he is attacked during this time.

    4 To Me! To Me! OMy Kinsfolk!

    The PC makes an incredible racket, drawing visitors fronearby. Following the current combat, immediately roon the Wandering Monster Table to determine the newarrivals.

    5 Does Your Wife

    Fight, Too?

    Play when the PC has reduced an opponent to half or

    fewer hit points. The PC begins taunting his enemy,throwing in a dreaded wife jibe or two. The enemyimmediately regains 5d12hp (not to exceed starting hpwill only attack the PC if there is a choice, and gains +to hit and damage for the remainder of this combat.

    6 You Want Some?How About You?Oh Yeah YouToo?

    The PC will never attack the same enemy twice in a rounless there is only one enemy left. If necessary, the will move, retreat, and/or suffer uncontested attacks tochange opponents.

    7 This Calls ForStrategy!

    For the next d6 combat rounds the PC will not attack,instead attempting to hide in shadows like a Thief (50%chance of success). If successful, the PCs next attackwill automatically hit for triple damage.

    8 CHAAAARGE!!! The PC will immediately charge headlong into meleecombat with the enemy that has the most hit points. Ithat enemy is slain, the PC will move on to the opponewith the next most hit points.

    9 They Wont ExpectThe Unexpected!

    If the PCs primary weapon is a missile weapon, he wilonly melee attack; if his primary weapon is a meleeweapon, he will only use ranged attacks. If the PC onlyhas one weapon type or the other, he will attackunarmed.

    10 Good Show, Old Play following the PCs next missed attack. The PC is


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    INT-WIS Fumble Tables

    Boy, Good Show! particularly impressed by his opponents defensive skiand thrusts out a hand to congratulate him/her/it/Orcu

    The opponent gains an immediate attack at +3 to hit.

    11 I Have The Powe AAUUUGH!!!

    (A hand weapon + a flask of oil) x no common sense =an epic fail at creating an improvised flaming weapon.

    The PC takes 2d6 fire damage, and all within 10 feetsave vs. breath weapon or take d6 fire damage.

    12 Never Let ThemSee You Sweat.

    Nobody this outnumbered should look this confident!Immediately halve the morale of all enemies, make amorale check, and apply the results. Treat any enemithat are immune to morale effects as automaticallysurprised for d4 combat rounds.

    d12 WIS Misc. FumbleName

    WIS Misc. Fumble Effect

    1 These Look Good! A small patch of mushrooms catches the attention of thungry PC. Needless to say, they are quickly eaten rd6 to determine their effect: 1) belch fireball, all within

    10 feet save vs. breath attack or take d6 fire damage 3) incapacitated by vomiting for d6 turns 4-5) heal2d4hp 6) +3 STR for 2d6 turns

    2 Trust Me, I StudiedDiplomacy.

    The next time the party tests for monsters reactions, PC gets things backwards. He will immediately attackfriendly or indifferent monsters, and will suffer oneautomatic hit (due to surprise) from unfriendly or hostmonsters.

    3 Itll Give MeWings!

    The PC will immediately drink the next potion that theparty finds, no questions asked. Apply effects as norm

    4 Well, I DidntThink Wed NeedThat.

    The next time the PC goes to a backpack, pouch or sacto retrieve any item, that item is unavailable. It may brecovered following the current adventure.

    5 Step On A Crack,Break Your MomsBack!

    The PC is tormented by his superstitions. For the next2d6 hours, halve all non-combat movement rates for tentire party.

    6 Its RiiiightTHERE!!!

    The next time the party checks for secret doors, the PCwill meticulously examine one section of wall, listen atcarefully, then step back ten feet, draw his weapon anmake a running charge through the wall or actuallyinto the wall, since it turns out theres no secret doorthere. The PC suffers d4 damage and 1 on all to hit rfor one day.

    7 Here Boy! HereBoy!!!

    The PC has found a little buddy! Roll d6 to determinewhat it is: 1) Carcass Scavenger 2-3) Giant Centipede 5) Giant Rat 6) Throghrin. There is an equal chance th

    creature will either immediately attack the PC, orfaithfully serve the PC as a devoted guardian. The PCmay have multiple pets.

    8 I Gots To GetPaid!!!

    The PC has had some time to think about it, and cometo the conclusion that hes not getting his fair share ofloot. Shouting, foot stomping, and (racist, if any Dwarare present) epithets ensue. Roll on the WanderingMonster Table to determine what is drawn to the sounof arguing.

    9 Oooh My Bad! The PC disregards proper spacing while marching and


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    INT-WIS Fumble Tables

    gets a bit careless with the business end of his weaponIf the party has any magic items made of cloth (cloaksbags, etc.), one is torn and ruined (determine randomlthere are multiple items). Otherwise, the nearest allygets poked in the eye and suffers 1hp damage and apenalty of 2 to hit for the next d2 days.

    10 Well, This Is JustAll Wrong!

    Rrrrriiiiipppp!!! The PC becomes convinced that the mathe party is working from are inaccurate, and only heknows the correct route. Immediately confiscate anymaps the PCs have been given as handouts, or havecreated on their own during this adventure. They maycreate new maps as usual. Re-roll if the PCs have nomaps.

    11 I Was FeelingNot So Fresh.

    The PC uses all water (including holy water) carried bythe party in flasks, vials or other containers for animpromptu bath. The water is lost, but the PC gains a+1 bonus to CHA for all reaction rolls for d2 days.

    12 Make Way For TheExpert!

    The PC will find and disarm the next four traps he comwithin 20 feet of, gaining 100xp each time in theprocess. Any Thief who witnesses this will be petulantfor d6 turns.