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[1]
July 2010
IW SOULWe believe that if it’s worth doing, it’s worth doing well. Whether it’s a day at the office, a night at a night club, trekking Nepal or just chilling out, watching TV.
Soul means being there 100% and this online magazine joins out Blog and Web in celebrating all the ways we can clear distractions, cut through the mediocrity and do whatever we do, 100% with heart and soul.
IW INNERWEALTH We started Innerwealth because we were just frustrated with different religious people beating each other up, there’s no Soul in that so we offer an alternative.
Thamo
Nepal Himalayas
3400m
IW SO
UL M
AG 1
[2]
About Chris WalkerHated by some, loved by others, Walker challenges the status quo in a mission to shake the world into a new awareness. By reconnecting people to their true nature through nature, Walker believes that the wars between, religious, physical and emotional boundaries will decrease.
IW SOUL #1Let Nature Be Your Guide
WELCOMEFighting For Religious Rights is a Losers Game
Thousands of years of wisdom distilled through nature
History teaches us well.
Every religious war that has ever been
won, has been temporary.
Every religious wall that’s been erected
has eventually come down and yet, we still
build them.
Poverty drives people to religion. And so,
simply putting up Nature’s Laws as a unifying
theme to all embattled boundaries between
nations and people is not, in itself, going to
change the universe. But, maybe it’ll help.
Religious boundaries are not limited to
organised religions. Strong opinions -
righteousness about any topic at all is a
boundary, a religion is just a set of beliefs and
there are many tree hugging, whale watching,
oil spill condemning people who’ve actually
formed their own little boundary, little divide
between do and don’t that are just as terrorist
as the next religiously motivated suicide
bomber.
Nature is an alternative only when an
individual is ready to understand that “I am not
my thoughts.”
Over these past 30 years we’ve worked in
Indigenous Communities who, in the name of
righteousness and anger have become
terrorised by their own abuses, we’ve worked
in organisations where the families of execs
wish them to stay away, go on trips and work
longer hours because they’re just an ugly
intrusion on a beautiful home.
Non Violence starts with the individual
and that’s where we believe reconnecting
people with their True Nature through Nature,
can make a massive shift in Global leadership.
Poverty is often financial, but there’s a
worse poverty, and those are fear and anger.
The violent protester, the righteous
terrorist, the vindictive ex-partner, the spiteful
parent and the raging street criminal are just as
poor after they abuse or steal as they were
before it. Poverty really is a state of Soulless
Existence that does not change with religion.
“Go Outside
Go climb a hill, swim a
lake, paddle a kayak, walk the
forest... We don’t need walls in
which to celebrate soul we
have nature an reality.”
Chris Walker
[3]
Leadership Lessons from the Himalayas
By Chris Walker
Each year I am gifted to lead groups of
people into danger, in fact, groups and
individuals pay me to lead them into
dangerous places.
It’s been twenty five years and forty-nine
journeys up into those mountains, on the path
to the base camp of Mt Everest and seven
other of the world’s over 8,000 meter peaks.
We don’t put on crampons or use ice axes as a
rule, we trek to one of the two highest trekking
peaks in the world, and at about 5600 meters
above sea level, it’s a serious challenge for
most people, in the short two week window
they have for a holiday.
I did an MBA but as a guide up in these
mountains over these twenty five years I’ve
learned a lot about people and leadership and
these insights are what I’d love to share.
What are people asking themselves about
you as a leader, at work, at home or in sport?
1. Can You Get Me There?
Acclimatisation is a process in which the
mind and body are challenged to adapt to new
levels of altitude and oxygen. As a leader I
cannot be working on my own acclimatisation
while I am helping others. I can’t be working on
my own stuff and turn up for others. So, I go
up before my group and over prepare.
2. Can You Lead Me through
Challenge?
There’s a radical difference between
management and leadership and that
difference is the difference between success
and failure on any mountain adventure.
Leadership is about the FUTURE, management
is about the NOW. Both are important,
management I can delegate, leadership I
cannot.
Sometimes people don’t respect me as
their leader and at first I thought this was bad,
but then I came to see that when people don’t
see that I add value to the future, in other
words they don’t need me or my knowledge in
order to get them where they are going, I am
not the leader. Leadership means add value
and if I don’t add value to someone’s future, I
can only manage.
3. Do You Really Care?
People want to know what’s in it for me
leading them. Is it the money, the power, the
glory or do I have a real commitment? It took
15 trips to prove this one statement, “I really
care.”
5. Can I trust you?
The way people think, act, feel, enjoy, or
give to others doesn’t change just because
they achieve something. Thinking is the
SHERPA LIFE
Dumji Festival Time. Dumji Festival in the Himalayas celebrates the end of one year and the new beginning of the next. A time of ritual, dance and celebration - marked with generosity, prayers, food and fun. A beautiful personal time for Sherpa people and those they invite.
Dumji Festival
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process and if we’re intending to change
ourselves or our lives, it must begin with the
next step, not some destination.
A leader obsessed with the destination
may have scant regard for the process and is
therefore, outside of trust.
6. Do You Have Compassion?
Like the process of acclimatisation we
can move through life facing challenges and
then taking a rest at certain times. We grow at
the border of chaos and order, and we need to
realise that people need a break sometimes
and at other times encouragement to re-
educate themselves to move through
incompetence.
7. Are You Beyond Doubt?
There are many obstacles on a Himalayan
walk, but none so terrible as doubt. There are
many process for dealing with doubt, but
there’s only a few that really move doubt to
confidence without hardheadedness which
always leads to catastrophe.
A leader is transparent and hardheaded
bluff, to overcome doubt is the most
transparent. Is your ability to achieve what we
want believable in you first. Do you believe in
yourself or not?
8. Do You Really Know ME?
At first I used to trust that what people
said they were capable of, and wanted to
achieve was what they were capable of. This
proved to be a terrible over trust in people’s
judgement of themselves mainly because they
had no real understanding of what lay ahead.
Only I know what’s ahead really well because I
am, as the leader, meant to know it better than
everyone else. In the end, results are reality
and I found it better to expose people to
circumstances that represented the challenges
of the future in order to estimate their capacity.
9. Do You Have A Bigger Picture than
Me?
On one trip to Nepal four guys challenged
my competence as a leader probably 30 or 40
times a day. They asked about the future, the
route, the dangers, the escape routes if there
were emergencies, the lodges and more. The
question is, do you have a plan B
There is no power, no empowerment if
there is no plan B. The person who can
implement plan B fastest is the leader. We call
this, “the Helicopter” approach.
10. Do You Trust ME?
Everyday people ask me “what’s ahead”
and there’s a temptation to present the best of
it. Wisdom in the end suggests that good news
balanced with challenge news makes people
trust you more because it’s the truth.
We can’t manage or lead anything we’re
in. The helicopter approach means rising
above the push and shove to see the order in
the chaos
11. What’s Your Real Experience?
A leader who is surprised at what goes on
around them, is no leader. They’re a follower.
Surprises in human behaviour is the most
revealing incompetency. In a world where the
book is judged by the cover, it’s nice to know
that really, we’re deeper than that and this is
one of the questions that takes us there.
*****
Chris Walker
Mountains are Sacred
Places
Nepal Himalayas There’s something spiritual about being in the presence of the highest mountains in the world. Suddenly your thoughts are small and the world is big and it feels good to know it. And with that experience there comes a sense of Soul, a deeper awareness, a creative, inspired, calm, and that’s an unforgettable reality.
ON TOP
[5]
and as such, can be repelling no matter how
enthusiastic they try to achieve.
Underpinning the success of most great
people is a deep awareness of contentment,
that everything is going to be all-right, even if
they fail.
The cause of discontent is separation.
Separation from nature, from other human
beings (competition), separation from our
Innerwealth. A separation that comes from
thinking without feeling. Separation of mind,
intellect, emotion from Reality.
Understanding the REAL nature of things
will help you find contentment and relax into
your ambitions. It will help you communicate
with others better, and turn up more in a better
space as a leader. Remember, a needy leader
is really just a follower.
Understand EmotionEmotion is the most pleasurable and most
painful of all the faculties of life. It cannot be
one without the other. Emotion can vary form
the most tender and absorbing love, to the
most violent hatred. These two can be directed
successively to one and the same object.
Emotion is the most dangerous of all the
faculties - overworked it can lead to a great
STOP10 KEYS TO NATURAL HAPPINESS All human problems come from our inability to sit quietly, happily in a room by ourselves. Pascal.
If a fire-fighter arrived at a fire worried
about the laundry, one could be forgiven for
thinking that something was not going to go as
planned. And yet, everyday, leaders can fail to
turn up to lead their teams with unfinished
business on their plate.
The beginning for moving from coach to
leader, from manager to leader is to deal with
your own stuff so you can turn up to lead
others through theirs. In other words, “Turn up
Happy.”
This means, you are happy before you
work, speak, write, achieve, get married, get
divorced, attend the graduation, win the golf
tournament or the lotto. You’re happy before
you lose the weight, finish the book or buy that
car.
Happiness that comes from doing or
getting or having is a very vulnerable
happiness, an emotional happiness that can be
stolen in a blink and therefore has no base for
leadership. Unreliable people don’t get trusted.
The first place people have to rely on a
leader is that the leader is actually going to
turn up, 100% of the time with their laundry
done, their desk clear, their head straight and
peace in their heart. A stressed leader is no
leader unless the people they lead are even
more stressed, a self fulfilling prophecy.
When somebody asks you, “what makes
you happy?” there are many ways to answer.
But the best answer for a leader at home or at
work, at least the best internal answer is
nothing makes me happy, “I’m happy
naturally.”
In the West we are in the habit of seeking
things to make us happy, and this turns life into
an emotional roller coaster. Food, people,
addictions, alcohol, work, knowledge,
relationships become a passport to happiness
rather than the celebration of it, or even better,
a way of giving it.
In happiness it is always wise to
remember, you can’t give what you haven’t
got.
Ten Easy Keys to Happiness at Work
1. Contentment
2. Understand Emotion
3. Stillness
4. Me Time - Circuit Breakers
5. Helicopter Mindset
6. Expunge Doubt
7. Real Expectations - No Surprises
8. Meditation and Concentration
9. Clear Your Worries
10.Peace of Mind - Nature
ContentmentMost Western life is based on the premise
that something is missing, and with work,
effort, seduction and accumulation that
missingness will go away. Hence, for most of
us life is based on the premiss of doing things
in order get things which in the future will
cause us happiness.
Based on this premise our consumer
society, democracy, relationships, religions and
most ambition drives us from birth to the
grave, and for this there are both benefits and
drawbacks.
The benefits we’ll utilise in the
BETTERMENT area of this Happy, Better,
Faster program for now, in Happiness, we can
see that always wanting can create a sense of
never content, which, underpins a huge
amount of human discontent, illness, violence,
self-sabotage and communication problems. A
needy person has this “discontent” mastered
[6]
motivator or actor or a patient in an insane
asylum.
Emotion is the chief faculty by which you
move the minds of other people. Insofar as
they realise your Emotion within themselves,
they will respond to your use of it.
Emotions should always be definitely
coupled together in your mind with the ACT
you wish the other person or persons to
perform. In order to know what emotion you
need to feel within yourself you must know
WHAT you want them to DO.
When you know WHAT you want done, by
one or a crowd, you can study what Emotion
to use to get that thing done. Thus, emotions
carry you to the heights of fame or success,
Every famous person has become so by
reason of the Emotion they were able to arouse
in the heart of the general public.
Now you can see the influences that also
act on you. Those that lead you also spread
their emotion out to you, and sometime this is
not well thought out. In an ideal world you
would choose those you hang out with to
harmonise with your chosen emotion, but this
is not possible. Clients, friends, followers,
leaders are not always conscious of their
impact on others.
Hence, for happiness we must take
charge of our emotional state. Firstly by
choosing the appropriate emotions we wish to
have and secondly by being aware of, and not
reacting to others. This skill I will share with
you in your program.
StillnessA key ingredient in personal happiness is
the ability to cut through the fog and be still.
Behind all the spin, the physical aches
and pains, the mental turmoil of life, the need
to be responsible and pay your bills, provide
for others and meet budget, behind the TV
shows, theatre, sports and ambitions, there’s a
you that just wants peace and quiet. It’s called
the listener. The Spirit.
This is a pretty important part of life that
we sometimes ignore or hand over to others to
care about, mostly because we perceive that it
has no “value” in achieving what we want. But
it does, it can, if we connect to it, guide us
well.
Stillness is an opportunity to
experience that connection to our
Happiness independent of our
circumstance. Nelson Mandela might be
a good example of this gift in practical
application, the Dali Lama another.
Me Time - Circuit BreakersYou’ll meet people, and maybe do
this yourself, where their day, from wake
to sleep is one continuous thread of worries
and thinking, punctuated with driving, during
which the thinking continues, and time with
family, during which thinking continues, and
then a few glasses of wine during which
thinking becomes blurred and then sleep.
We think, but really, most of the time we
only think that we think. Giving yourself circuit
breaking moments between meetings,
between work and home, between email and
conversation might just be the difference
between healthy communication and not. It
may also be the difference between burn out
and sustainable work and, last but not least, it
could be the difference between self-respect
and head spinning self-sabotage.
Start your day with your happy time, me
time. Don’t wait until something gets you down
before you seek solace. Take time alone and in
a place of harmony with nature to connect to
your own measure of happiness, and then go
out into the day with that awareness.
Helicopter MindsetManagers work down in the emotion of
everyday life while leaders need to rise above
it.
There’s a word we’re often afraid to use in
our modern era of compassion and human
rights, understandably is superiority, however,
if you are not superior to a circumstance you
are left to manage it for minimum damage and
maximum comfort.
To be superior to a circumstance is to
understand that circumstance from a
helicopter mindset, to see order in chaos.
The person at the top of any team group
or country understands the greatest order.
The child understands order in pleasure
and avoiding pain. The youth might understand
order in their own body and consequences of
food, rest, abuse like over exertion and over-
study. Adult might understand family
dynamics. The locally successful adult will
understand the order in the chaos of their
chosen field - sport - business. The national
champion understands regional matters and
can see the order in it. The international
champion can see order in national events. In
other words as we rise in leadership and
success we rise in the capacity to be superior
(see the order in) to the dynamics of the level
at which we’re leading. Global leaders need a
universal viewpoint otherwise they lead by
force and haphazard control. (in business this
is called fraud).
Expunge DoubtA child is encouraged to ask why, why,
why? And we are motivated to answer this
question because we wish to expunge doubt in
the child’s mind, give clarity.
Doubt is the enemy of happiness.
Doubt leads to lost courage and lost
courage leads to complacency (settle for less)
and settling for less leads to boredom and
boredom is the opposite to happiness.
For many people activity is the antidote to
boredom. “Aholisms”, such as work-”aholism”,
alc-”aholism”, food-”aholism” and
sex-”aholism” victim - “aholism” and
blame-”aholism” are just a few ways people
escape boredom and it’s friend, unhappiness.
But action is not the solution to boredom,
just as kissing is not the solution to lost
intimacy.
Inspiration lives beside happiness in the
human heart and this is what can be blocked
and cause doubts to rise.
In the program I’ll share the skills to
unlock inspiration and therefore expunge
doubt.
10 KEYS TO HAPPINESSIf you could peel away all the wants, needs, hopes, desires - you’d find happiness
[7]
Real Expectations - No SurprisesThere is cause and there is effect in every
circumstance. Sometimes, we forget to link
those two and get a surprise about the effect,
or result.
One glaring example of this is treating our
values as hierarchical, and therefore setting
priorities for goals. This modern mess is the
ideal way to bring about great disappointment.
For example: working hard and finding your
relationship failed. Or getting healthy and
finding your finances in a mess.
Balance is a vital key to happiness
because the pain of regret always outweighs
the pain of discipline. The future is predictable,
what we do, think, eat, don’t do, today, causes
tomorrow.
We’ll spend time examining how you can
cause what you want in the future through
disciplines today, habits, that guarantee it.
Meditation and ConcentrationConcentration - meditation is an act
which must have the cooperation of all five
senses.
But concentration is never developed by
the practice of concentration. Concentration
can only be developed by the intensity and
extent of your interest in whatever you are
doing.
Real concentration/meditation on a useful
subject never occurs while you are busy
learning to concentrate or meditate.
When you concentrate on concentration,
you are not concentrating. When you meditate
on meditation you are not meditating.
Concentration requires a subject worthy
of your full and undivided attention.
Delinquency, uncontrolled emotion and
negativity is caused not by the lack of
concentration but by the lack of a subject
worthy of it.
Two people might meet each other and
become engaged in courtship. They
concentrate on each other, but after a time,
nothing is new and that concentration may
diminish. Those people might go to counselling
and do all sorts of concentration training but
this is not helpful at the root. It would appear,
that it is what we don’t know about a person
that keeps us focussed and concentrating
rather than what we do know.
This is the responsibility of
a leader, to keep the intensity of
work interesting enough to
absorb the concentration of the
individual, and to see the
warning signs when a
person can do their job with
their hand tied behind their
back and either promote
them to greater challenge or
move them to another
occupation. The idle mind is the
soil of trouble.
But we are our own leaders
too. So, we must ensure that
our life is not blamed on others
to present to us things and
projects of interest in order to
stimulate our concentration. The real success,
the real lover, the real inspired individual will
always drum up a new exploration, they will
not be the victim of an overly compassionate
and sleepy leader.
Clear Your WorriesMy father died from worry and stress, and
in his years before finally passing he’d say,
“most of what I worried about, never
happened” Happiness and worry cannot
cohabit. I’ll share a process to help you defeat
worry during your program.
A person who arrives home at night, or
who goes for a jog with worries on their mind
might, in the end feel some relief but that relief
is temporary at best.
Worry is a habit, and unresolved worry
that carries over into other areas of life buries
itself in cells, muscle tissue and brain matter.
The actual cause might be forgotten but the
chemicals of worry stay, embedded, and these
are what eventually trigger illness.
Worry does not get resolved by worrying
about worry. I remember well at a Zen retreat
trying not to think. The monk had told us that
we just sit there, and eventually with focus and
open eye meditation we would reduce our
mind noise. Of course I started trying to
eliminate that mind noise by thinking, “mind
noise go away, which was, in itself, mind noise.
Peace of Mind - NatureLove Nature - Love Life.
Even the most stressed person gets more
happy, more relaxed and more creative and
generous out in nature. Something changes in
a person when they feel at peace with nature.
This doesn’t mean climbing Mount
Everest or paddling a kayak half way around
the world, no, it means loving something about
being somewhere, out in nature.
A flower always represents generosity and
love, even when it’s grown in Vietnam, trimmed
in Holland, scented in the local importer’s
warehouse and sold in a multi chain massive
supermarket with as much love as a floating
tennis ball. Flowers are a part of nature, and
their meaning transcends the journey they’ve
had.
I remember once giving a friend some
flowers that were clearly labelled as “not
expensive.” Probably a supermarket
newspaper and plastic enclosure. She was
thankful but a little dismissive. The next time, I
re-wrapped those flowers in an expensive
branded paper, and handed them to her with
greater pride. The response was a miraculous
shift. It’s not the flowers is it? It’s the nature of
the giver.
Nature is perfect and the key is, how we
feel when we’re out and amongst it. Not what
we do, but how much we love it.
TEN KEYS TO HAPPINESSContinued
HappyRegardless
[8]
Five Common Blocks to Human Happiness and How to Deal with Them
Anger
Of all the blocks to happiness, anger and it’s associated emotions
of hate and resentment are the worst and the most severe of these is
anger and hate that is not conscious to the owner. This reveals itself in
more subtle ways of criticism, impatience, short temper, control
and negativity.
Greed
You can’t be unhappy and thankful at the same time,
so much unhappiness comes from the insatiable appetite
for more and more and more. Appreciating what you’ve got
is the key to overcoming greed.
Fear
All stress is made from either fear or guilt. They’re brother and
sister. Fear of the future - guilt about the past. Overcoming fear is a
major skill in healthy living.
Knowledge
Knowledge is the most dangerous asset if that knowledge can’t be
applied. When theories are touted as realities we are trapped shaping
the ego into a duality, a public “what I want to be” versus a private “I
know I am not walking my talk.” This dichotomy turns life into
a red alert emergency.
Blind Ambition
When life becomes so busy that we can’t enjoy our
humanity, can’t feel the tenderness in our heart, can’t
enjoy a smile, can’t give a coin, can’t let go of our
opinion, can’t smell a flower, can’t stop for a breath then
we have done ourselves out of a life. Robots and
sequential programs will replace most of what we do within ten
years, all that will be left in the world is work that involves humanity, the
one thing robots can’t duplicate. Will you be employable then?
Is Happiness a Choice?The most powerful and precious gift we can have are the keys to happiness and yet, we seem confused. Happy people work better, love better, do better and more.
KNOW YOURSELF STILLNESS APPRECIATION BALANCE PEACE OF MIND
Your Constitution determines far more than your hopes, dreams, desires. Why not live in harmony with nature and what your heart and soul were designed to thrive in?
Break the CircuitSitting, breathing, using the senses, remind yourself that happiness is not conditional on outcome, it’s the place from which we start.
Your VibeWhat you appreciate grows, what you don’t appreciate, depreciates, people become as you treat yourself.
Go - StopCan you turn up in play and just be there for others? Celebrating being without doing?
Clear the PastAre you arriving here carrying unhealthy stuff in your head and heart and body from yesterday?
5 Blocks to Happiness
WHAT GETS IN THE WAY OF HAPPINESS?
[9]
We rise to the level of our Own Incompetence - Nature never grows in straight lines, and neither do we. We
accelerate sometimes, slow down in others. We grow as people at the
border of support and challenge, and sometimes that’s not exactly
as we planned it.
Living and working in harmony with nature’s cycles is a
great balancing act. When to accept things as they are,
when to chill out and bask in past glory and when to put the
pedal to the metal and go forward with some determination
is a really fine piece of judgement.
But that’s not the most important question... No, the most
important question to answer is “What’s Going On?”
Helicopter view of anything gives you superiority to circumstance
and therefore wisdom in dealing with it. It’s like looking from the outside
in at your life, your relationship, your health. Most often, people who are
outside of your circumstances can view them more wisely than you.
Tin the Self Leadership diagram a person has scored themselves
out of 10 in each area of life. The outer ring is 10/10 absolutely perfect,
the inner circle is 0/10 absolutely miserable.
You ask this: If I could wave a magic wand and turn this
person’s score into 10/10 in all areas tomorrow, and I
asked them back next year to do the same scoring,
what would the Self-Leadership score look like?
The answer is, the outer circle (what’s possible) would
have grown and the score would be, once again, the
same as today.
Frusta means frustration. It doesn’t prove that you’ve stuffed
up, it proves you’ve grown, and it’s time to become a beginner again.
Beginners mind puts you back in the fun of learning.
Want to learn, and therefore unlearn your opinions, in order to
change your score.
Personal GrowthGrowth rings on a tree show that a tree has ambition to grow, then stop, then grow, then stop. Each time we grow, we stop and that stop is called Frustra.. Frustration, unable to grow because our beliefs need to shift. It’s called UNlearning.
NO COMPENSATION CONSCIOUSNESS PEOPLE
Happy to Better to Happy
to Better
FRUSTRA
[10]
Manage or LeadBoth are important but they are two different topics. Manage is comfort, pleasure, happiness and play now. Lead means discipline, ambition, desire and anticipation for the future. The glue that binds people, long term, is the latter.
INSPIRED
LEADER OR MANAGER?A leader leads people toward the future. A manager makes the present comfortable, functional and enjoyable. Where do you spend your time? Where do you add value?
Happiness doesn’t motivate people, but
the lack of it does. So, managers focus on
making people happy because they want to
eliminate the “de-motivators.”
Making people happy really helps,
because unhappiness really does cause
people to struggle. The problem is, with
unhappiness gone, most people don’t have a
real motive to go forward.
Begin with the idea that you have to
manage your own life for happiness before you
can manage others. Then realise that you can
not make people happy. That’s a cat chasing
its tail. If a person is not happy now, then no
matter what you add, they will have the habit
of seeing imperfections and therefore remain in
a constant state of dissatisfaction. Like eating,
filling, hungry, eating, filling, hungry. Therefore
management is a really difficult and thankless
task unless it is given without expectation of
return. It is, in some ways, a mothering or
caring role, supportive, recuperative.
Management is the process of eliminating
unhappiness, but, as we’ve seen, in a
consumer society (Nature) there’s an endless
stream of possibilities for becoming
dissatisfied - unhappy. It is so easy to take for
granted what we’ve got, take things for
granted, and compare ourselves to what we
could have. Overcoming discontent is therefore
a real motivator for most people but it’s energy
sapping and leads to unethical responses and
often
There is a more powerful mechanism.
With Happiness in the bag and an appreciation
for what is, there can be an incredible
opportunity to go into the future, happy but
inspired to do better.
Can you see the radical difference. One
leads to disappointment and ill-health, the
other leads to success, love, contribution and
betterment without doing harm to others. So,
as well as what do we need to manage - we
can ask “WHAT FUTURE DO YOU WANT?”
All Eyes are turned to the future.....
[11]
Nobody Trusts a MANAGER
Do you trust managers? I don’t.
A store manager has the store’s best interest at heart, no matter
what they say, they better do good for the store or they get fired.
A product manager has the product at heart, they might say they
care, but do they? It’s mostly marketing hype
A sales manager gets paid for sales, so, when they tell you how
much they care about the environment, do they or is this good
sales pitch?
Would you trust a comedian to lead you through the
jungle? Odds are, if they’ve done a great job of managing
your laughter, you know they’ve got the ability to jerk you
around if they need to.
Great managers are great tricksters. Great leads are not.
So, what’s the difference? They both recruit you to do things by
linking with your emotions - what is the difference.
During this phase of the program we’ll discuss and I’ll share some
amazing insights as to the real difference between a manager (who all
but the most needy people trust) and a leader, one who is trusted.
Most companies and families love tomato sauce, or what’s called
in America, Ketchup. I call most managers Catch-up, because they
spend most of their time trying to Catch-up with complaints,
fixing problems, sorting out issues, fighting fires and
dealing with drama. It’s a stressful job. If you work as a
doctor or nurse in the emergency area of a hospital
you’ve chosen that career. But not everyone wants to
be in such demanding, healing and drama solving role.
Some people want to be leaders and pioneer the future.
Even those people in the emergency must, in some part of
their lives outside that work, want to progress. Leadership
means tomorrow, knowing it, and going there, risk free.
Motivation versus InspirationThere’s violent ambition that’s powerful, achieves things at great cost to others, takes huge energy and is mentally and physically exhausting. Then, there’s inspiration which is sustainable, non violent and contributes to a better world.. Your choice
GOT TO SHOULD NEED WANT CHOOSE TO - LOVE TO
The poor individual who is in got to mode is in personal poverty, even if it’s the final of the world cup or helping refugees or running a billion dollar company.
Structures put in place to cope with fear and guilt self perpetuate strong identity, obsession, addiction and conflict.
100% emotion, would rather coat the world in leather than wear sandals. The height of insecurity and completely unwilling and unable to trust anyone, especially self.
Leadership begins. A sense of tomorrow, and sacrifice short term need, should and got to for long term ambitions. Discipline starts - includes others
The flame of intensity burns in this heart, and with it, rational thinking that combines WHAT is wanted, with how. No longer blind, this person leads with consequence, cause leading to effect. This person will cause others to follow. Trust is automatic.
Leadership is about the future risk
free.
NON VIOLENT AMBITION
[12]
I believe that it’s best to prepare for your
off site with me well in advance, and I think
you’ll agree that it’s the best way to make the
most of our time together.
There are three points of focus for your
June retreat: Happy, Better and Faster.
Let me explain. Innerwealth initiated a
global initiative to improve workplace wellbeing
about 15 years ago. The primary focus of this
program is to help people in all walks of life
become happier, do better and sort things out
faster. We’ve had incredible success with this
in Canada, and now, we are achieved some
great steps forward in Australia.
The premise of the program is simple: We
want to teach people how to make their
happiness bullet proof by separating what we
do from how happy we are.
This has remarkable impact on people at
home too, because many people enter
relationships unhappy and hope the
relationship will somehow improve that
unhappiness. Under this strain, relationships
struggle.
The emphasis therefore is Turning Up in
life, relationship, sport, work, happy already.
This is a remarkable freedom and most of our
high end athletes and entrepreneurs report and
extraordinary shift in their productivity and
achievements in this one skill alone. So, we’ll
chat about this early in your program and then
share how.
The second, and in many cases the most
difficult area of this initiative is in BETTER.
There are many programs and techniques for
self betterment, but the majority of these lead
to imbalanced focus and subsequently
imbalanced lifestyles.
In your program we’ll be encouraging you
to look to the future to create balanced
ambitions in all 7 areas of your life. And it’s in
this area of the program that we’d love to ask
you to do some preparation.
Simply it’s ten minutes a day, between
now and the program.
Teams DiversityThe best teams are made up of the best
people, independent people, whose personal
motive combines with others for a united
focus. This in essence means 100% personal
responsibility for turning up ready to
contribute.
ProcessThe process of preparing for the HAPPY,
BETTER, FASTER program involves a simple
vision quest done alone, at home, in silence.
What this process involves is asking
yourself a series of simple questions and
writing down the answers - as they come to
you in any random, unintelligible order.
Each day, answer the questions then put
the sheet with your answers in a safe place,
and don’t look at it again until this is all
finished.
Each day, start a fresh sheet of paper and
ask yourself the same questions as yesterday.
Don’t miss a day.
By my calculations you should be able to
integrate 5 continuous vision days. Try not to
discuss this with your partner until after the
program, but, if they’re inquisitive and you
can’t explain it, please just give them this
introductory note and let them fully understand
the reason you are embarking on this journey.
The Questions:The base line of health, energy, success,
ambition, romance, leadership and peace of
mind is DESIRE.
When we know what we want and we
think we are going to get it, we’re inspired.
When we know what we want and we think we
are not going to get it, we’re depressed.
Ambition is a two edged sword. Set the
ambitions too high and we become
disillusioned and usually end up in some
Eastern Ashram saying “It doesn’t matter.” But
it does.
Set the ambition too low and there’s no
challenge, you become bored with yourself,
your work, your life and lose concentration.
Such loss of focus often results in calamity,
accident or disaster.
Set the Bar High EnoughWhen doing your daily questions aim for
around 3-5 years for the time-frame and, make
sure the bar is set so that you’ll have to do
some serious improvement in your abilities to
achieve it.
Sometimes it’s good to compare yourself
to someone who has achieved more than you
but don’t aim to the height where you become
envious. Envy just means you set the bar too
high too quick.
Be, Do, HaveThe emphasis of a vision quest must start
with have. What do I want to HAVE in 3-5 years
from now. These things are tangible,
countable, measurable and can be weighed.
Please don’t write HAVE HAPPINESS... That’s
a BE.
The second question, and equally
important but not of material nature is BE.
What or Where do I want to BE in 3-5 years
time. That could be a place, (New York) a
space (pregnant), or even a change of status
like married or CEO.
Finally, theres DO. What do you want to
be DOING in 3-5 years time.
Doing could be More of what you are
currently doing, but please, don’t make the
mistake of saying NOTHING. Doing nothing is
not a Goal, it’s slow suicide. Doing means what
would inspire you, cause you to concentrate
more, study more, learn more and teach more.
It can even involve giving.
Nobody but you will read these answers
so, please avoid the all too often tendency to
be right, or say what others would like or what
you think you should say. Just use this chance
to be really, really, really, honest. NO ONE WILL
EVER READ THESE SHEETS BECAUSE.
When you finish the five consecutive days
of filling out these sheets, make a little back
yard ceremony and burn all but the last one,
and even the last one can be burnt. This is a
process, not an outcome.
Each day might be the same as
yesterday, but, like a child treat this as a
chance to dream beyond your current reality.
Go on, have a go!
VISION QUESTEverything that happens in life starts with a desire. All Eyes are turned to the Future, unless they’re unhappy.... It’s hard to do good if you don’t feel good.
[13]
Good Work - means faster.If you could do what you need to do, and get on with what you want to do faster, what would you do with all that spare time? If you had five extra hours a day, could you fill it with things you love or just occupy the time with things you feel would be productive?
FASTERGet there
SEARCH FOR TEACHERS AND PROCESS TO GET YOU THERE FASTER, HAPPIER, AND BETTER CONTRIBUTION
Think Faster
Make Decisions Faster
Get Over Emotion Faster
Clear Confusion Faster
Get over the Past Faster
Find Stillness Faster
Get What you want Faster
Fall in Love Faster
Recover Faster
Peace of mind Faster
Unhappiness leaves Faster
Play Slower
Pulse Rate Slower
Immune Breakdown Slower
React to others Slower
Fall out of Inspiration Slower
Kids Grow Up Slower
Life Passes You By, Slower
Opportunities lost Slower
Moments of Beauty - Slower
Special Feelings last Longer
Aging Comes Slower
Nobody wants to get more slower, except
old that is...
[14]
Moving Between Happy and Better - Faster.
How long would it take to live your life all
over again?
If you took out those things that turned
out to be a waste of time, those times when
your emotions kept you from those you love, or
from meeting the one you love, how long
would your life add up to?
Healing takes no time, but we make it
last, sometimes for years.
Learning takes no time but sometimes we
make it last - just for a simple experience -
twenty years or more.
It is said that if we add those “aha”
moments up and put them all together in a
bundle our life would total around ten minutes.
Those unforgettable inspirational
moments of realisation and love are truly rare.
For the average person, those moments
are accidental. But they do not need to be
accidental.
The first question is what do I want?
The second question is what does my
team want?
The third question is how do I stay happy
going there?
Then a whole swag of more detailed
questions are needed.
I hope this has been as much value to you
as it has been to me in my work and personal
life.
For me, it’s the culmination of years of
Zen practice, meditations, yoga, business
science and experience.
Be Happy and make that happiness
independent of what you do, who you’re with,
where you are or what you own. Be happy
means be thankful and content.
Do Better means contribute more, make
your efforts to improve your own life and
wealth, but do this under the mindful
awareness of healthy living, both for yourself
and others.
Faster is not about rushing, in fact
sometimes rushing around is, in the long term
slower than deliberate and emotionless
awareness. Sometimes stopping - patience is
a short cut. But no matter what the process the
intent is to waste less time be more present
and therefore do the right thing whenever
possible. Like weight loss, wouldn’t it be
smarter to save that trouble and not put it on in
the first place?
With Inspiration
Chris Walker
FASTER
Time There is one thing that can never be replaced, and that is time. It comes and goes and is gone. It is the most precious thing you can give another person, and the most precious thing you can steal from someone. Don’t waste it.
Nothing is Permanent
[15]
Article: ConcentrationConcentration - meditation is an act
which must have the cooperation of all five
senses.
But concentration is never developed by
the practice of concentration. Concentration
can only be developed by the intensity and
extent of your interest in whatever you are
doing.
Real concentration/meditation on a useful
subject never occurs while you are busy
learning to concentrate or meditate.
When you concentrate on concentration,
you are not concentrating. When you meditate
on meditation you are not meditating.
Concentration requires a subject worthy
of your full and undivided attention.
Delinquency, uncontrolled emotion and
negativity is caused not by the lack of
concentration but by the lack of a subject
worthy of it.
Two people might meet each other and
become engaged in courtship. They
concentrate on each other, but after a time,
nothing is new and that concentration may
diminish. Those people might go to counselling
and do all sorts of concentration training but
this is not helpful at the root. It would appear,
that it is what we don’t know about a person
that keeps us focussed and concentrating
rather than what we do know.
This is the responsibility of a leader, to
keep the intensity of work interesting enough
to absorb the concentration of the individual,
and to see the warning signs when a person
can do their job with their hand tied behind
their back and either promote them to greater
challenge or move them to another
occupation.
The idle mind (lost concentration) is the
soil of trouble.
But we are our own leaders too. So, we
must ensure that our life is not blamed on
others to present to us things and projects of
interest in order to stimulate our concentration.
The real success, the real lover, the real
inspired individual will always drum up a new
exploration, they will not be the victim of an
overly compassionate and sleepy leader.
Article: Change - How long does it take?
There are some things that are better
done by taking more time to do them. Some
remain obvious but things like eating, kissing,
and walking in the park, well they're a few of
the Better done with More Time."
But when it comes to recovery after a
stress, illness, bad mood, emotional upset, or
a decision, a choice, a grudge or anger, there
aren't many people who could legitimately say,
"more time is better."
Of course, if our process is weak, or our
head is in turmoil, then longer might give time
for clarity, however, that's just like driving a
1954 Austin Prefect through the city at peak
hour and wondering why people are screaming
at you or paddling a 30 kg wooden surf ski in a
ski race and wondering why you got left
behind.
Faster, is better if the pace of the world
makes you uncompetitive to be slower.
Remember that whether it's your business,
your client, the race you're in, your health, your
money, your relationship, it is a competition,
and there are forces out there wanting to
displace you. Keeping up, or staying ahead in
life requires FASTER.
Take health for example: The bugs and
bacteria floating around our cities and in our
water would kill a person who was time
transported to the present day from say,
1860.Their immune system could cope with
the competition from bugs and virus, but not
quick enough to be of much value.
Your relationship is another example:
What do you think a realistic competitive
expectation might be from your partner for you
recovering from the following: a bad day at
work, a disappointment in sport, a hard night
on the booze, a quarrel with your mate, a worry
of any kind, an ugly comment toward them?
Do you think, like in 1910, they'd give you the
benefit of a year, a month or a few hours? Life
is evolving and whether you like it or not, we
must too.
But there are institutions devoted to NOT
FASTER.
I worked with the public service and for
them, FASTER more often than not, is
associated with redundancy because if you get
your job done faster, you’ll have nothing to fill
the time. You’ll be “rationalised."
In some healing therapies FASTER is
associated with loss if income for the therapist.
I've witnessed this conflict between FASTER
and REVENUE over and over again during my
years in this work. It is, in most cases, not in
the financial interest of the service provider to
reach completion, faster.
Article: Self Worth and TImeWhat seems compassionate in giving
people "time" to sort things out, may not be
achieving the positive result the giver expects.
Take D who was working in one company I
consulted with, they had given her nearly three
years to sort out a marriage break-up,
tolerating late arrivals, time off for counselling
and days off for stress. When I arrived, hired to
"speed things up" to happy, better, faster I
noticed a huge push back from any shift in
productivity improvement. After I dug below
the surface, it was a company wide joke that
no company, seriously considering
productivity, leadership, good work, client
satisfaction or employee well-being would
leave a situation where D could come and go
as they pleased.
The fact was that D had been given
permission to become the lowest common
denominator in the team and yet she was team
leader. She would change things without any
concept of the process cost, she would assert
her negative moods on the group, and as time
went on, and D's self-worth became more and
more self-obsessive, the quality of her choices
became poorer and poorer. D's boss was
acting with compassion but was in no way,
doing what's best for D or everyone else in the
firm.
FASTER is not new news.
We're communicating faster, travelling
faster, getting news faster, having things faster.
It's not new news that the evolution of the
planet is linked to faster. All technology is
driving a faster world and that, harnessed in
the right way, is an ever increasing valuation on
time, self-worth and humanity.
Faster foods, faster crops, faster fuels,
faster drinks, faster medicine, faster operations
to save lives, faster rescue, faster response to
disasters, faster intervention in human-rights
crisis. And where faster is not fast enough, we
complain bitterly.
If the post is slow, the internet is slow, if
your website is slow, facebook is slow, if skype
is slow, if your batteries don't recharge faster
you upgrade. Faster is, for the new generations
better.
RESISTANCE IS FUTILE
I meet people who say to me, "the world
is going too fast it needs to slow down" and I
say "evolveyabastard" - with a smile. There are
people who're now taking the role of the
"Retirement" generation who, just really got left
behind in the evolution race. They can't think
[16]
fast enough, can't type fast enough, can't
cope with the speed of decision making fast
enough and want the world to SLOW DOWN -
I WANT TO GET OFF.
FASTER IS FANTASTICER
Faster is fantastic. Why waste precious
time? Why be in a bad mood for more than the
time it takes to get out of it? Why be
exhausted for longer than necessary? Why be
ill or in pain for longer than you have to?
Staying FIT for work and life starts with
the identification of a series of really important
questions:
1. What would I do with the time if I finish
this task faster?
2. Am I ready to act if I make this decision
faster?
3. If I had an extra three hours a day, what
would I do with it?
4. Do I really want to turn up more in my
relationship, or am I turning up to the level I
can cope with them?
5. If I get through this drama faster, will I
be lonely and fearful, and is that why I'm
hanging onto the past?
6. If I knew what I knew now, how long
would it take to live my life over again? (usually
ten minutes)
7. If "How do I get more done in less
time" results in getting more done in less time,
is what I am doing worth doing at all?
FASTER IS BETTER
If you are in love with your partner
wouldn't you want to spend more time with
them? If you love your work wouldn't you want
to spend more time doing it and less time on
low priorities? If you love your sport wouldn't
you want to do it more, recover faster and do it
again?
Doing what you love means deriving a
benefit from something and ultimately FASTER
means, deriving that pleasure more often, with
less distraction.
It's time for a revolution in WORKPLACE
WELLBEING. Faster is not just a technology
issue it's a SELF- MANAGEMENT issue and in
too many teams, the brakes have been on for
too long. Slower is not better, even in healing,
meditation, yoga, tai chi, acupuncture, - and all
the alternative medicines - SLOWER is NOT
better.
HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE?
Marriage Break Up - 2 weeks to
completion
Depression - One Day to Recovery
Bad Mood - Ten minutes at the most
Broken Heart - 15 -30 minutes
Bad day at the office - 2 minutes
Disappointment with someone special - 3
minutes
Life changing decision - 10 minutes
Changing Your Life - 1 hour
Article: Happy, Better, FasterHappy, Better, Faster is based on a
premise that the primary goal of humanity is to
be happy and make better and do those as
fast as humanly possible.
This article focussed on betterment. The
key to which is in the understanding of motive,
mind and manifestation. How do we get what
we want in the shortest period of time?
What you want might be a better world,
less violence, more food for the starving, a new
car, a 3D tv or even a partner in life. It could be
sales results for next month or a new cat for
the family home. Nobody can judge us for the
highness or lowness of our ambitions,
however, we do encourage people to be
holistic in their desires. To make sure all seven
areas of life are well represented so as to avoid
imbalance and regret. That topic is well
covered in our seminars.
But now, lets turn our focus to
manifesting what you want in a generic sense.
Speak to a woman who has read a book
or is keen to manifest something and she will
often recommend a certain process for
achievement. Speak to the average bloke and
he will recommend another and sometimes we
find this divergence in process quite confusing.
Different guru's some spouting ideas of "THE
SECRET" which is basically sitting on your Butt
and wishing stuff would come true. While
others, talk about "Waking up Some Giant"
who'll reach out and grab life by the balls. It
seems, both work - sometimes.
In Happy, Better, Faster we're not
debating the validity of Betterment as a motive
or even advocating one process as better or
worse than another. What we are saying,
clearly to the Global Workforce, is that there
are hidden consequences, and if Betterment
improves one area of your life but sabotages
another, it isn't BETTER, is it?
Too many Betterment programs and
Betterment process "rob Peter to pay Paul"
they shift the focus of your life from one value
to another, for which the consequences are
unseen maybe for years until, single and
successful you realise that your paradigm shift
after your divorce just turned you into an
"individual" who can't be hurt. Or, your new
relationship which is the new focus of your life,
cost you your Inspiration and Career. Sucking
juice from one area of your life to feed another
is not change or Betterment, it's suicide.
Betterment is built on tangible reality. By
separating Happiness from Betterment we
achieve an amazing step and that is, to
differentiate how you feel, from what you do.
Betterment is, in this paradigm a means of
doing things, contributing, achieving things,
giving service, making a better world that is no
longer a GIVE TO GET model. By separating
your Happiness from your Betterment you
uncover an amazing power.
Stuff you do, get, have, want, desire,
need, don't need, win, lose, fail, succeed, love
or don't love - doesn't make you happy or
unhappy. That's a separated topic and by
doing this you loosen your ego from your
doing. In this one small step, you free yourself
to give it a go, have some fun, try some things
and not get into a mess trying to own stuff to
make you a happy person. They are different
topics.
Five Planes of Betterment
There are five distinct planes of
Betterment. They are:
1. Physical - The desire for pleasure of all
the senses.
This natural attraction to all things
beautiful, safe and comfortable is the
fundamental search of the primal and natural
self. It never goes away, can never be satiated
and most often dictates choices in life.
2. Mental - Comparison drives the desire
for improvement.
Driven by the continual dissatisfaction
and appetite of the physical self, the mental
plane starts to work on comparison. How
could I get more, and make it better, with less
effort?
3. Monetary - The desire for Resources
and Power to cause change in our life and
others
With Physical gratification, and mental
comparison firmly motivating betterment we
now reach for bigger and more sustainable
measures of betterment and enter the sacred
and spiritual realm of material wealth creation.
Money. Thus, competitive standards inspire
new technologies, our own potential and
integration of our physical and mental gifts into
the world - in other words - money drives
citizenship and community.
[17]
4. Psychic - A new
With money no longer the primary
occupant of our daily desire for betterment,
connections become the greatest joy known to
most people. These are biblical and spiritual
times, when, with money under your control
and it is building at a good rate, you are free to
experience the betterment of unspoken
awareness far beyond the measure of your
original aspirations.
5. Soul - Spirit - This cannot be explained
in words.
Understanding BETTERMENT - Twelve faculties of Betterment
1. Desire - Know what you want - and
keep it alive
2. Appetite - Never fully satisfy your
appetite or it'll kill desire
3. Instinct - Gives you trust you won't be
screwed in seeking to fulfil your appetites
4. Impulse - Combined with instinct a
potent combination in all walks of life.
5. Spirit - The Principle on Which you
operate - eg, a kindly spirit, a generous spirit, a
helpful spirit.
6. Courage - Closely aligned with Spirit is
courage. Superiority to the conditions you face
is courage
7. Ambition - Courage gives you the
ability to withstand present opposition,
ambition gives you the desire to forge ahead
onto more opposition. A surplus of ambition
makes you unhappy and miserable because of
the unattainable. Lack of ambition keeps you
unhappy because of the undesirable.
8. Emotion - Emotion is the most
dangerous of all the faculties - overworked it
can lead to a great motivator or actor or a
patient in an insane asylum. Emotion is the
chief faculty by which you move the minds of
other people.
9. Thought - Thought must be transported
into some form of emotion to be effective.
Thought is in the background of all activities of
the human being and is something that
requires a constant building up mostly through
the four contact points Learn, Remember,
Compare, Teach.
10. Knowledge - Knowledge is a
collection of facts. But thought is only useful
insofar as you can apply these facts. Therefore
it is wise to only seek knowledge that you can
constantly use. Knowledge gained but not
applied or organised becomes the trash of the
mind.
11. Intellect - Intellect is intuitive use of
knowledge. Intellect is the organising faculty
that makes the correct arrangement of all the
other faculties, allows them place and value.
None of the faculties should be discounted or
considered more or less important. Intellect
reveals this.
12. Reason - Reason is naturally a fighting
facility. It is best used in defeating argument
from opposite viewpoint. The primary one of
which, is your own self-doubt. To develop
reason requires opposition and resistance and
the use of all other facilities. Reason is almost
without emotion, an almost cold, well balanced
mind. REASON determines the WHY and the
HOW of events around you.
MORE DETAIL
1. Desire
Desire is absolutely essential to the progress of
life. Even those who teach desirelessness are
expressing the great human desire for rest and
relaxation. Desirelessness is a desire.
Desire exaggerated becomes a craving,
To properly use desire you must study the
beauty and the advances of that which will
give you the most pleasure and profit
combined with the greatest good to the
greatest number of those around you. Desire
that excludes those around you will burn you,
consume you.
Desire that includes others - and their
advancement will never do great harm.
2. Appetite
Appetite is always the result of Desire,
desire can be aroused in all five planes
(Physical, mental, financial, Psychic, Spirit.) but
appetite can only be applied on 3 planes,
physical, mind and moneterary.
To keep appetite alive and healthy it must
never be fully gratified. The maximum peak of
enjoyment is found just before complete
satisfaction. This applies to all five elements of
life, air, water, food, warmth and sex. To avoid
absolute climax in any of these, produces the
greatest possible profitable enjoyment.
The appetite to learn eagerly is all always
heightened when the subject holds more for
you to absorb. When you think you know it all,
the learning becomes surplus and then it's the
same as over eating.
3. Instinct
On the money plane get used to income
of money so that you are not afraid to spend
and receive money readily in the direction you
are going. Instinct is less than intuition and is a
good guardian against being ripped off.
Instinct is linked to attraction and repulsion -
and therefore is usually a mirror of
subconscious beliefs and wounds, reactions. It
is wise not to ignore this but it is, in the same
degree, unwise to follow your instincts solely in
any dealings with people.
4.Impulse
Impulse can be healthy if it is in the direction of
desire, instinct and appetite. Impulse roaming
free without containment or regard to the other
three will cause harm. Impulse and Instinct are
brother faculties and should never be used
alone.
5. Spirit
Spirit is the energiser of the mind. Spirit
represent the principle on which you operate,
fiery spirit, kindly spirit, your principle use of
spirit will be found in your reactions, the facial
expression, your reactions, self defence,
support or otherwise.
Spirit is very communicable. Sometimes the
Spirit of a whole group of persons will be
dominated entirely by the Spirit of one member
of that group. Crowds are controlled by the
spirit of the group or by the spirit of the leader
of the group. When you understand the Spirit
of a group, you can market to them and lead
them.
The Spirit is the seat of all knowledge in you
and because of that you will do well to be
alone each day to communicate with your
spirit. - This is the primary function of the spirit
- to communicate in solitude with you.
6. Courage
Closely aligned with Spirit is courage.
Superiority to the conditions you face is
courage. Sometimes courage is awareness of
conditions that are superior to you but you
dare to take a chance.
Courage is a spiritual faculty. Courage can be
built up through the animal, (dance drums etc)
and supported by knowledge in the mental
capacities. The best way to build up courage is
to put your mind on the times you have
succeeded. Courage can also be created by
cutting off all lines of retreat.
[18]
7. Ambition
After courage comes Ambition. Courage
gives you the ability to withstand present
opposition, ambition gives you the desire to
forge ahead onto more opposition.
A surplus of ambition makes you unhappy and
miserable, because of the unattainable. Lack
of ambition keeps you unhappy because of the
undesirable. The path between the two is well
balanced ambition, directed toward a practical
even though difficult, objective.
To increase ambition put your mind on the
desirability of the pleasures and the luxuries of
an advanced position, not too far ahead of
you. Ambition should be centred upon an
objective not more than 3-5 years away, at the
most. Always keep that distance with new
objectives.
Comparison with someone ahead of you is
good incentive for ambition. If that person is
not far enough ahead of you, to arouse envy
it's best. Envy is just ambition for something
too far ahead of you.
8. Emotion
Emotion is the most pleasurable and most
painful of all the faculties. It cannot be one
without the other.
Emotion can vary form the most tender
and absorbing love, to the most violent hatred.
These two can be directed successively to one
and the same object and so, Emotion is the
most dangerous of all the faculties -
overworked it can lead to a great motivator or
actor or a patient in an insane asylum.
Emotion is the chief faculty by which you move
the minds of other people. Insofar as they
realise your Emotion within themselves, they
will respond to your use of it.
Emotions should always be definitely coupled
together in your mind with the ACT you want
the other person or persons to perform. To
regulate your emotion in the right direction you
must know WHAT you want other people to
DO. And when you know WHAT you want
done, by one person or a crowd, you can study
what Emotion to use to get that thing done.
Therefore, emotions carry you to the heights of
fame or success.
Every famous person has become so by
reason of the Emotion they were able to arouse
in the heart of the general public. Every looser,
lunatic, harmful and terrible war monger,
Islamic terrorist has done unspeakable harm,
empowered by the same forces aroused in the
heart of followers.
Emotional control is the primary
responsibility of religion and as with all else,
this can serve the greater good or the greatest
evil.
Marketing an romance are the finer arts of
seduction of emotion.
This is the key, but we realise that in order
to communicate an emotion we must become
comfortable with that emotion. if we want to
change another person's emotional state, or
influence a child's emotion, then we must
experience and authentically feel the emotion
we wish to communicate.
An angry parent telling a child to be good,
does not achieve behavioural change. A violent
person telling people to stop being violent
does not communicate the real result. If I wish
betterment in minds of others then I must first
shift my emotion and let this be mirrored.
9. Thought
Thought must be transported into some form
of emotion to be effective. Thought is in the
background of all activities of the human being
and is something that requires a constant
building up mostly through the four contact
points Learn, Remember, Compare, Teach.
Thought is most effective to you as a thinker
when you EXPRESS that thought.
You can only become a useful thinker
when you find pupils to teach.
The teaching of your thoughts will be
most effective when the comparisons you
make are mostly original with yourself. In other
words you have witnessed and experienced
such thoughts in action in your own life, and
can prove their validity, personally.
There is no actual NEW thinking, so do not
expect your thoughts to be original nor be
disappointed with the discovery that someone
else has had them before you. There is no new
knowledge. Just different experiences and
therefore different words to express their
application.
The constant effort to find comparison
and experience will gradually make your
thoughts and expressions to appear original to
those around you. You may even appear
original to your entire generation, since so few
people really think. Most people only think they
think.
In your thoughts try to express what you feel,
rather than what you have heard or read.
10. Knowledge
Knowledge is a collection of facts and
knowledge is only useful to the degree that you
can apply those facts to real life everyday
reality. Hypothetical or philosophical facts are
junk unless they have results.
Words are Words
Thoughts are Thoughts
Knowledge is knowledge
Results are Reality.
Gather knowledge but never gather
random knowledge. Organised knowledge is
power. Random knowledge is junk mail in your
mind. Always categorise new knowledge into
one of the five planes of existence, Physical,
Mental, Financial, Psychic (emotion and Love)
or Spirit Plane? Does it apply to you or others?
Does it apply to past, present or future. Cross
reference you knowledge. How does this
knowledge apply to the plane it works on.
Locate a real life use for this knowledge and
categorise it so. Excess and worthless
knowledge leads to isolation and lost intimacy.
11. Intellect
Intellect is the intuitive use of knowledge.
Intellect mostly operates on the mental,
monetary and psychic planes and has little
value in the physical plane. Hence, most
attraction and action that is based purely on
the physical comes from people who have not
fully developed their powers of intellect.
Intellect is mostly used in teaching and
writing of books. While some faculties are
limited by the channel through which they flow,
the intellect has no such limitation. Some of
the greatest intellects of our time have not
come through the school system, their mind is
what we call uneducated, and yet, their
wisdom is astounding. Therefore, there are
other schools other than the conventional
approach through which the intellect is
awakened.
Intellect is not limited by the rules and
regulations of society, culture, religion or class.
and may equally express itself in the highest
and lowest minds.
The best way to develop your intellect is
to constantly apply your knowledge. Intellect is
brightened and sharpened by contact with
opposition. Many people who avoid challenge
[19]
in any field do themselves a disservice by
running for safety of the physical instincts
instead of harnessing and honing their intellect.
The key to intellect development is to
avoid argument. If someone is against you, or
has a different opinion to you, think out your
responses before speaking - IN SILENCE AND
ALONE.
Then, when responding to opposition,
and after retreating to think out those answers
in SILENCE AND ALONE, present your
knowledge, and INCLUDE all the answers to
the opposition without bringing up or using the
opposition argument. Simply give answers and
more.
12. Reason
Some people think that the ability to
reason is what separates man from animal, but
animals can reason, and animals have all
faculties. However, man can recruit and align
all the faculties mentioned above whereas in
animal, those faculties operate independently.
Humans can see order in chaos, and
therefore understand why and how things
happen, both in the past, and in the future. To
harness reason for betterment we share the
UNIVERSAL LAWS OF NATURE, in order to
promote a greater level of reason, and
therefore linking all the faculties for FASTER
manifestation.
A person without reason cannot debate or
question law, and therefore must, by necessity
stay constrained by whichever faculty jumps to
the front in a situation. One who can reason,
and who is unafraid of time ALONE IN
SILENCE, will think before they act, aligning all
the 12 faculties to a common focal point of
concentration.
Summary
Happy, Better, Faster is a smart distillation
of thousands of years of spiritual common
sense. It brings the the foreground the
awareness that:
1. Happiness is independent of action
2. Action for Betterment is best controlled
by the alignment of 12 faculties
3. Faster means achievement, eliminating
distraction and change happens in the
minimum of time
Corporate TrainingFocussing on just three key points we
transform an individual's opportunity to
express their real human potential in the
following way.
Happy - We show that happiness starts
within. Its a no blame, no gain, no loss,
resilience that brings happiness back to the
human heart where it belongs. Result: People
Turn Up Happy and happy people do more
love, more inspired work, better parenting and
certainly, without doubt, better health.
Better - With people taking responsibility
for their happiness by removing blame from the
company, the boss, the culture or market, they
can swing their focus from what they need to
what they contribute. The world has become
obsessed with self-importance, self-obsessed
and emotionally vulnerable and this does
nothing positive for global, corporate or
personal well-being. If we want a better
working world, it begins with the motive to
make the world a better place because we're
in it, not in spite of it. The first place to start is
by a commitment to better service, better
value, better improvement, better contribution,
better concentration, better communication,
better integration all comes when happiness is
personalised and contribution becomes the
focus.
Faster - How fast we get through
something, how fast we process an emotional
injury or an uncertainty is completely
conditional on how much heat we apply to our
life. A "comfort" focussed individual can take
20 years to "get over" a drama, whereas an
individual, focussed on a MAIN GOLDEN
OBJECTIVE, might take minutes. Everything is
going faster, except how we manage
ourselves. You'll hear the old T model Ford
technology for self management repeated day
after day and all the infrastructures, training
and management models set up to support it,
like: "I'll change over the next year" or " give
me time to sort it out" or "let me think on it."
That's like rocket launching with rubber bands.
Faster means - Think faster, recover faster,
rebound from negative emotion faster, get
enlightened faster (no need for meditation) and
do therapy in five minutes instead of five years.
Faster means better decisions faster,
management consulting faster, leadership
choices faster and, stop loss faster. The
technology is here, so why not give yourself
more leisure time, get more done in less time,
spend more time on the beautiful stuff of life.
Happy, Better, Faster - Innerwealth really
is a gear change for those people who really
do want to make the best of life and the
opportunities it presents.
Article: Re-Inventing YourselfHappy, Better, Faster - New Beginnings.
Madonna did it, Puff Daddy did it.
Beckham did it. Brad Pitt did it. Tiger Woods is
going to have to do it.
Re-inventing yourself means re-birthing
yourself. It's like the bud coming to life in
spring, or the child skipping to school after a
long night's rest, renewed and reinvigorated,
ready for a new day, a new adventure.
Do you want the old chance back? Would
you like to live again that "lost opportunity?" Is
your life incomplete because of the thing you
could have had, but missed? With your new
awareness would you love to "give it another
try?"
You may have gone through a divorce and
want to start a new "after divorce" life. You
may have gone through a threatening illness
and want to come back to the world for a new
start. You might have reached the peak in your
field and become bored, disinterested, even
depressed about life and want to re launch
your youth. You may have just given birth to
twenty eight children and now want your life
back. Whatever the motive, to re-launch, re-
birth, re-invent yourself in the world, you'll
need to label it, no rhetoric. You first need to
say, "I want another chance" and only from
those words, or similar, is a second chance
with higher odds of success than the first
chance, possible.Or, you just might be saying
to yourself, "Life is slipping me by and I want
to take a bigger swing at enjoying it."
Why label it a rebirth, a re-invention, a re-
incarnation? Because minor change, small
piecemeal approaches, small incidental
investment and plain wanting things to be
different makes a zero probability of renewed
success and, because you are downright being
honest, I can do it different, it wasn't them, it
was me who caused and therefore its me who
can re-invent myself. It's no use wishing the
world to be different, or basing you renewed
hopes for changes circumstances on meeting
a better, different, nicer, more generous person.
That's not going to change a thing when,
eventually, people become as you treat them.
What needs to change, for a change in result,
is you, and that change we call, re-inventing
yourself.
One last thing before we begin. Intellect,
knowledge, information, new religions, hanging
[20]
out in temples, being sorry about hurt or
espousing new virtue has absolutely no effect
on your re-birth. It's more likely that changing
the cotton quality or silk quality in your undies
is going to have more impact in your rebirth.
Lets see why.
This article takes you through the
essential check list for your own rebirth into the
future. Each step paves the way to the next,
one leads to the other, and in most cases,
automatically gives rise to the successful
rebirth, the new life and recapturing of
opportunity lost. Picture in your mind the vast
difference between Evolution and Revolution.
Know that we can evolve daily and when we
don't, we get behind in our development and
therefore need revolution. RE-Launching
yourself, Re-birthing your life, Re-inventing
yourself is a revolution, a situation that has
come about because you didn't evolve in some
area of your life, and now, there's a confession,
IT'S TIME. I WANT TO RE-TRY, I WANT
ANOTHER CHANCE AT THAT OPPORTUNITY I
MISSED. I WANT MORE THAN MY LIFE
BACK. I WANT ANOTHER CHANCE AT IT.
Summary
Step 1. THE LAW OF DISCARD....
LETTING GO STUFF
To gain re-birth of your physical body you
must discard old habits of thought, old habits
of eating, and sometimes the old place in
which you have lived.
Step 2. RE-BIRTH of YOUR CELLS
How you breathe, what you eat, how you
eat, what you think while you eat, where you
eat, how you drink, and what you drink, affects
the quality of the cells of your body. Cells
rebirth every minute and if old patterns are
allowed to stick, so, old patterns of cells will be
created. We'll examine this later.
STEP 3. RE-BIRTH of YOUR
APPEARANCE
When you get dressed in the morning, put
a little love into that garment. Make your
choices around clothing from a whole new
perspective. Not the cheapest, or the most
convenient, nor the most comfortable. So,
much hinges on the clothes we wear,
especially the underwear, we'll talk about this
in detail.
STEP 4. RE-BIRTH of YOUR MENTALITY
With changes in cells, and appearance,
you will need to live up to this new born
reputation you're creating. This requires a
change in language, new opinions gained from
those people who are in a superior position to
you and in line with what you want to
attain.History takes on a whole new meaning
here because it shows you the results of your
past experiments, in this, you re-birth history in
a new era.
STEP 5. RE-BIRTH of YOUR MONEY
INSTINCT
After time, with your new mentality, your
opinions become more valuable, and as a
result, they acquire a value, a constantly
increasing value, and as people make
comparison with each other, about the things
you say, they determine to pay you more. Now,
a huge mistake is often a block to re-birth,
because a new value has appeared and yet we
can often underestimate this, and revert to old,
more time based means of income. You are
now worth more to others, and the first person
to recognise this must be you. It is also a
mistake people make in re-birth, to start
hoarding money in fear of it's loss - like last
time - but this is not the consciousness of
wealth - instead, new things to buy, new
dreams to spend the money on, new aims,
new ambitions will drive the accumulation of
wealth (Vision, Inspiration, Purpose - Vision
Quest) More about this later.
STEP 6. RE-BIRTH on the PSYCHIC
PLANE
As soon as you are sufficiently RE-BORN
on the Money plane, you begin to arrive at a
courageous, fearless outlook in money
matters, and with this, you attract around you
Souls that can only make themselves known to
you by subtle impression. You begin to feel
guidance, unhindered by the fears or doubts
about money, a delightful new era emerges,
and because money does not demand your
time or attention as much as before, you begin
to feel the definite impression of this higher
urge, the Soul urge, a Purpose greater than
you. Sometimes this RE-BIRTH is painful, and
involves letting go of those things or people
you are attached to on lower planes, There are
feelings you cannot describe, Beliefs you
cannot explain. Friends and family who
operate on lower planes may even become
estranged, judgemental, and think you've lost
the plot. But these things make no difference
because you have begun to taste the ecstasy
of Re-Birth on this Psychic plane.
STEP 7. RE_BIRTH on the SPIRIT PLANE
Re-Birth on the SPIRIT plane can mean a
whole lot more than a new religion or a
renewed attachment to such. For many people
this has been the Happiest event of their life.
It's the discovery of the Great Spirit, and rather
than a belief, it is the ability to USE higher
consciousness in their daily life. Nature takes
on a whole new meaning, colours are new,
weather means something different, even little
children become messengers and teachers
from the Gods, bringing new truths.
COMPLETION - PLANNING YOUR OWN
REINCARNATION....
Every-time you put thought toward the
great things you want to do, you add value to
your re-incarnation in a new life. Your ambition,
which is the NEAR future realisation of your
wants and hopes, you rebirth new faith, new
belief in your thought, you regain courage, you
change the film and therefore change the
projection of that film strip onto the screen that
is your life.
The JOURNEY in DETAIL
STEP 1. DISCARDING THE PAST
Re-birthing your life, or Re-Inventing
yourself begins with discarding the past. This
does not mean, forgetting the past, forgiving
the past, moving on from the past. I've met
people who say they've moved on from a past
partner, but whose blood pressure shifts at the
mere mention of their ex partner's name.
Unfinished business in the past, runs our life,
what we resent or are attracted to in the past,
keeps us living that past. Hope for the future is
not enough, we must sincerely DISCARD the
past, whether a day, month, year or lifetime by
truly knowing that today is the best day of our
life.
Would you carry a grudge to your grave?
Would you carry unspoken words to your
death? Would you hold hate, anger,
disappointment, cruelty, meanness, or envy
toward any human being into your grave?
Today may be your last day. Nobody in the
World Trade Centre disaster went to work
saying, "this is my last day" but it was, they
died, and we can take some respect for the
value of their passing by learning from their
experiences. Today could be your last day.
There is no use in being victorious over those
you love by punishing them or by withholding
from them. Only love expressed in kindness,
generosity, compassion or appreciation,
releases the past.
So, re-birth means, the past can't hold
any attraction or repulsion to you. If you hear
yourself saying, "I've learnt from the past and
I'll never do that again" know that you're lying.
If you hear yourself saying, "I've let it go, and
moved on" - label yourself a liar. Such rhetoric
[21]
is entrapment and gives false sense of destiny.
Under such smoke lies a fire and that fire will
cause any RE-BIRTH to be based of force or
fear or aggression, and that's not RE-BIRTH,
it's RE-Peat.
Working harder for a better future makes
no more improvement on the circumstances of
the future than does following a new religion or
absorbing more knowledge into your intellect.
Knowing is not doing, drive without happiness
leads to the past. What we judged in the past,
we Breed in our Children, Attract in our Partner,
or Become in our Emotions.
It is therefore of the highest order of
importance in RE-Birth, to be HONEST with
yourself. Are you holding onto old stuff, from
yesterday or yesteryear and if so, how quickly
can you slice and dice, in order to DISCARD
THE PAST, authentically.
Do not give yourself weeks, months or
years to do this. Find a hard teacher, find an
honest mirror and ask for process. Deal with
the past, and be REALLY Ready to RE-INVENT
YOURSELF. This is beautiful and automatically
creates courage and willpower to move
forward with confidence.
Step 2. RE-BIRTH of YOUR CELLS
Every second of your life the cells of your
body are RE-Birthing, Renewing themselves.
Every-time you take a breath, you give new life,
a rebirth to millions of cells. That rebirth takes
on the nature and mood of the kind of thoughts
that goes with that breath.
When you take a drink of water, you give
birth to millions of liquid cells in your body,
blood and organs. Whether that rebirth is to
make you more vigorous, give you more
PERSONALITY, and a greater sends of LIFE,
will all depend on the kind of thought that goes
with that water.
The same principle goes toward the food
you eat, as the cells of your body are renewed
from the food you eat. What is your mood
while you eat? Are you in a "Terrible Hurry?"
Are you thinking about your competitor and
afraid they'll get ahead of you while you are
"wasting your time" eating.? It would be far
better to miss that meal and just drink a glass
of water peacefully and joyfully, than to eat in
any mood that is poor.
The world speaks of diet in the language
of Stuff we Eat. But the STUFF is not all the
story. As demonstrated below, the quality and
vitality of the CELLS that are reborn from our
breath, water, food are 100% conditioned by
the quality of thought, space, place, and mood
we hold at that moment of ingestion. Breathe
bad, think good, is a better promise, than a
mad yogi who breathes good and leaves their
mind to focus on negative or critical
depreciating thought. (like am I doing this
right?).
You will see the small delicatessen
preparing fast lunches for the city workers and
see the delay between making and serving
masked with microwaves to shorten the queue.
You'll see the poisons accumulating in food
prepared with speed and mass service but this
has far less impact -although important - than
the mood of that individual who is rushing
around town shovelling food into their mouth
without regard for the thoughts that spin in
their mind, and therefore infiltrate the reborn
cells of their tomorrow body.
STEP 3. RE-BIRTH of YOUR
APPEARANCE
When you get dressed in the morning, put
a little love into that garment. Make your
choices around clothing from a whole new
perspective. Not the cheapest, or the most
convenient, nor the most comfortable. So,
much hinges on the clothes we wear,
especially the underwear, we'll talk about this
in detail.
Be glad you have so good blessings that
this piece of clothing is available to you.
Anything that conjures up, a sense of
negativity, do not wear. I remember stealing
clothes when I was young, shoplifting and the
impact that had on me, while wearing it was
extremely violent. I was ostracised and
humiliated, even though I looked good, I felt
like a thief, the clothes were not mine. People
see through such masks.
Have beautiful things, clean things next to
your body. I once dated a lady who had more
skid marks on her undies than a formula one
Grand Prix circuit and yet, she wore the best
Armani Suits over the top. This person
attracted investment, but lost all of it. Her self-
worth didn't match her image.
This is not to speak of extravagance in
clothing. Best is not always expensive unless it
forms that impression in your mind. Best feel,
best quality, best against your skin is an
impression and it is possible to unhinge that
impression from brand markers. Sometimes, in
my experience, best brands, like Prada, are the
cheapest quality wrapped in a nice design. We
are not talking about impressing people with
image, we are talking about feel of quality, feel
of respect and due care for clothes so they
stay feeling good and looking good as long as
possible.
Last week I was in a rush and wore a shirt
that had hung dry, and I had not ironed. For the
day, I felt crumpled. I felt like I was hiding
something even though, I soon forgot about
the shirt. Actually, in a day of meetings, I
change my shirt at least twice in the day in
order to feel fresh.
Feeling FRESH in underwear against the
skin, impacts us in so many ways. It causes us
to feel more ambitious, to be RE-Born in your
outer appearance as well, which produces a
wiser handing of your money, and a better and
better selection of the clothes you wear that
determine much of your outer appearance.
Simply improving one thing will raise your
posture and give you proud stance, a posture
that, in itself, is a REBIRTH of mood.
People begin to comment on how much
better, how much younger you look. People will
want to be around you more, Your opinions will
be more respectfully listened to. I'm not talking
here about flamboyant attention attracting
fashion, and I am not talking about dull grey
suits that can be bought for $100 to give the
impression of "Good Suit" - I mean, you need
to FEEL good, Feel attractive, Feel at the
means to which your ambition is aimed.
Many years ago I was dating a lady who's
pride was fixed on how long she had owned
each piece of her clothing. In our social life she
attracted hippies and emotionally needy
people, while I was associating with people of
means. It was not a case of judgement, it was
a case of diversity in AMBITION that was
reflected in our clothing. She wanted to live in
a rainforest in a tree house, I had an apartment
on the Upper West Side of New York and
wanted more... It is a truth, I am here to say,
that the merging of two people in relationship
results in the averaging of both. In other words,
she ended up with a nice house in Soho New
York and I ended up losing my apartment and
living half in a tree house. The means of two
people who merge in business or relationship
ends up being the median of both.
It is wise therefore to choose a partner
with equal, or greater wealth than yourself and
this is demonstrated most often, not by their
bank balance, because this can be temporary
or even a testimony to past luck, but by the
underclothes and clothes they choose. Fake
watch, fake sunglasses and now, cheap quality
[22]
with fake labels for underwear reveal poverty,
hidden beneath many riches.
When you appear well it must be because
you have succeeded in something, is the
reasoning of most people. And since you have
succeeded in something, whatever it may be,
you must have something of value, at least in
that one thing, you know extremely well.
This appearance of a valuable opinion,
causes you to be REBORN amongst a little
higher group, because you now must seek the
knowledge to fulfil their expectation.
STEP 4. RE-BIRTH of YOUR MENTALITY
With changes in cells, and appearance,
you will need to live up to this new born
reputation you're creating.
This requires a change in language, new
opinions gained from those people who are in
a superior position to you and in line with what
you want to attain. Otherwise you'll feel like a
fake and be overwhelmed with insecurity. So,
there comes a drive for knowledge, for
superior insight, for better understanding. You
do not want to be all AIR and No
GROUNDING. Like a sandwich with nothing
between the bread.
You'll no doubt embark on a program of
learning, absorption, remembering and
teaching what you know. You'll hang out in
places that give you knowledge you aspire to
share, so you become a student, and always
remember that teachers are made to be
stepped on, not stopped on. Only if the
teacher is learning faster than you, can you
stay a student of one teacher. Balancing
learning with teaching is vital. If you learn more
than you teach (or can put into practice) you
become insecure and over ambitious,
depressed and anxious. If you put more into
practice or teach more than you learn, you
become unambitious, bored and mentally
dulled. It is best to create the impression of
your value and then make sure you learn
enough to fulfil that value.
I was a body builder for many of my
younger years, I achieved a huge physique and
impressed people about my strength, which
encouraged other men to challenge me to fight
them, which, I had no idea how to do. I had the
choice, learn to fight, or stop giving the
impression that I could. I chose the latter.
Appearances do give off radiant signals of our
opinions and capacities, which, will accelerate
our Mental Rebirth, if we really intend to
achieve this ambition.
RE-BIRTH of your mentality means new
knowledge, better knowledge - if you know the
same as before and seek those places where
people reinforce those beliefs, nothing can
change, and the REBIRTH will become
disappointing, achieving only a fraction of the
possibility.
Mental Rebirth also changes our view of
history. History takes on a whole new meaning
because it shows you the results of past
experiments, by yourself and others, which
means you can translate that real life
experience into a more refined awareness.In
you occurs, the re-birth of history.
STEP 5. RE-BIRTH of YOUR MONEY
INSTINCT
After time, with your new mentality, your
opinions become more valuable, and as a
result, they acquire a value, a constantly
increasing value, and as people make
comparison with each other, about the things
you say, they determine to pay you more.
And here you need to be on guard against
that old idea of "Put money away for a rainy
Day" - That rainy day becomes yet another
block to your ambition, your REBIRTH now
faces an opponent, your affirmation that, a
RAINY DAY will, or might come.
Money has a consciousness, and that
consciousness is spending. To accumulate
more money for a rainy day, is not the
consciousness of wealth. It is the
consciousness of foreseeable poverty and the
fear of it. Such fear does not go away with
accumulation or hoarding of wealth, but rather,
with a powerful new commitment to spending.
But when your mind receives money only
with the joyful and happy idea of the thing that
it is is NOW going to BUY, the advancement
that you can now make by the USE of that
money, you are entering into a great REBIRTH,
a great rejuvenation of your financial and
energetic means.
AHhh you may scream, but if I spend all
my money on instantaneous gratification NOW
I will have none for the future. And you are
right. So, your appetites must never be
quenched, forget trying to satisfy your
appetites, stay a bit hungry, a bit needy, a bit
desiring more in the physical mental world, but
more importantly, honour your ambitions in
which you will find short, medium and long
term visions. Spend in each, but spend toward
each. If you are dreaming of a home on the
French Riviera, then,
Now, a huge mistake is often a block to
re-birth, because a new value has appeared
and yet we can often underestimate this, and
revert to old, more time based means of
income. You are now worth more to others,
and the first person to recognise this must be
you. It is also a mistake people make in re-
birth, to start hoarding money in fear of it's loss
- like last time - but this is not the
consciousness of wealth - instead, new things
to buy, new dreams to spend the money on,
new aims, new ambitions will drive the
accumulation of wealth (Vision, Inspiration,
Purpose - Vision Quest) More about this later.
Ambition that is out of reach is
depressing. Ambition that is not far enough to
cause challenge is suppressing. Ambition
needs to be within range of potential
accomplishment and yet, under current
circumstances not achievable. Ambition must
require the integration of reborn cells, reborn
appearance, reborn mental state in order to
cause accomplishment. Otherwise it is simply
poverty dressed in another suit.
STEP 6. RE-BIRTH on the PSYCHIC
PLANE
As soon as you are sufficiently RE-BORN
on the Money plane, you begin to arrive at a
courageous, fearless outlook in money
matters, and with this, you attract around you
Souls that can only make themselves known to
you by subtle impression.
This, connection to people is often
mislabelled intuitive or instinctive but really it is
totally of the psychic or emotional plane. And
in this, we soon start to identify new forms of
association that are not always understandable
at lower planes of life.
This is an extraordinary achievement, and
impacts us in great ways. In my own life this
has become the primary form of association,
and lower forms of more conventional human
relationship have fallen away to make room for
it. For example: in Nepal I have people I call my
brothers and sisters, but they are not kin, or of
any same blood, but I am connected to them
in a brotherhood and sisterhood that is beyond
the hard structure of "family."
Psychic Rebirth means you begin to feel
guidance that comes because you are
unhindered by the fears or doubts about
money. With this rebirth, a delightful new era
emerges and because money does not
demand your time or attention as much as
[23]
before, you begin to feel the definite
impression of this higher urge, the Soul urge, a
Purpose greater than you.
Now this Psychic rebirth cannot take
place unless the ambitions and financial rebirth
are complete. It is the completed rebirth of
your financial plane with it's accompanying
rebirth of your dreams and ambitions in life that
gives rise to the need for something more to
live for and work for, than simple material gain.
Now you are able to say:
I need nothing, I want nothing and
therefore I have everything.
And from this point, there is a need to
delve deeper into your being in order to find
real meaning. This dive, this search for
meaning leads you to the Psychic world where
things aren't as they once seemed.
Sometimes this Psychic RE-BIRTH is
painful. It most often involves letting go of
those structures and people you are attached
to on lower planes. It often means a divorce, a
break away from family cultures that have
become self limited by the physical,
appearance or mental blocks of family leaders,
parents and grandparents. There is no truth in
the ideal of respecting your elders because
they are old, age and wisdom have long
become disconnected in a world of religious,
cultural and social adhesions.
In this time of psychic rebirth, the re-
Invention of YOU, there are feelings you cannot
describe. Beliefs you cannot explain. You can
become estranged from and judged by friends
and family who once admired and loved you,
but now reject and judge you. But these things
make no difference because you have begun
to taste the ecstasy of Re-Birth on the Psychic
plane, you are truly waking up to the idea that
there is more to life and more to you than what
you own, how you look, who you are with and
what you do. Another awareness comes, and
no words can explain it.
STEP 7. RE_BIRTH on the SPIRIT PLANE
For many people this RE-BIRTH on the
SPIRIT plane has been the Happiest event of
their life. It means a whole lot more than a new
religion or a renewed attachment to such. It's
the discovery of the Great Spirit and the ability
to USE higher consciousness daily life. Here,
Nature takes on a whole new meaning, the
colours of Nature are new, Weather means
something different, all things are imbued with
a new beauty, there is order in the chaos, and
your heart can feel and see it. Even little
children become messengers and teachers
from the Gods, bringing you new truths.
Everything takes on another meaning, and in
this you know you have dived below the
surface, beyond the lower planes you have
mastered.
Every-time you put thought toward the
great things you want to do, you add value to
your re-incarnation in THIS new REBIRTH.
Your ambition, which is the NEAR future
realisation of your wants and hopes rebirths
new faith in the future, new belief in your
thought, rekindles lost opportunity, gives you
courage to move through current circumstance
with ease and without attaching more PAST
Baggage that must be DISCARDED. You live,
in the moment, for the future.
In the REBIRTH OF SPIRIT, you know that
you and your capacities are the film strip, and
that you - only you can change that film strip
and as a result change the movie that is
projected onto the screen that is called your
life.
You'll now recognise the difference
between "HEALING HEADSPACE" And the
REBIRTHING HEADSPACE. One kills ambition
in order to create harmony in the NOW. The
other demands it in order to create
dissatisfaction with the NOW. Where are you
at?
Article: Magnetic RelationshipsHappy, Better, Faster - The Magnetism
That Causes a Great Long term Relationship
There are three basic requirements of a
great relationship: To be HAPPY (and not made
less happy by the relationship), to Be BETTER
because of the relationship and, to get what
we want in life (no matter what it is) FASTER.
Find a partner to bring those three areas to
fulfilment in your life and you'll be glued
forever, provide them, and it's love that lasts
forever.
Happiness - why we want to be in love
and in a relationship. Better why we choose
one partner over another and stay loyal and
faithful. Faster the incredible opportunity the
right relationship presents at a deep, soul,
spiritual level: fulfilling our ambitions - Faster.
I've also shared the five contact points
that people use to achieve HAPPY< BETTER <
FASTER. They are:
1. Faster: Physical and Financial
Attraction. Pleasure and Fulfilment come faster.
2. Better: Mental Attraction - Compare
your partner to anyone else and there is no
better.
3. Happier: Soul and Emotional Love
Attraction - A Deep sense of Perfection.
Happy, Better, Faster - Innerwealth -
Some background:
For the past twenty years I've been
walking around the earth selling one single
message to corporate workforce leaders, and
that has been: HAPPY, BETTER, FASTER for
the GLOBAL WORKFORCE. I've proven time
and time again that corporate teams that are
happy, inspired to do better (no compromise)
and rebounding Faster in the face of challenge,
do better, feel better and live longer. I've also
advocated, that, this work based idea of
Happy, Better, Faster translates into better
home life because those who do better, feel
better at work and recover faster on the way
home, TURN UP, in relationships.
Now, I'm going to push the HAPPY,
BETTER, FASTER theme more deeply into the
GLOBAL RELATIONSHIP world by introducing
how couples can stay together, not only in
length of time but in depth of love, longer.
Three things are at the heart of
sustainable relationships: They are, believe it or
not, HAPPINESS, BETTERMENT, AND .. yup,
FASTER.
LET"S START WITH FASTER:
If being with you makes my life slower,
makes my aches and pains last longer, makes
my emotional downers harder to recover from,
makes my career slow down, my plans
delayed, my vision extend out for more years,
am I going to remain committed to a
relationship with you?
We have to recognise here that
relationships are based on getting what we
want. They're all about love and attraction too,
we'll discuss that in a minute, but at the core
essence of human existence at the most
spiritual levels of heart and soul is, yes, getting
what we want. The more we have, in whatever
form, the more we can contribute. Nobody
wakes up wanting less - (unless it's stress).
Relationships succeed because you are
getting what you want, when you want it, and
you're getting it more, and faster than you were
before. And, yes, I hear the negative
implication of orgasms and so on, well think it
through before you shoot the messenger. Do
you think, you'll stay happy in a relationship if
you can get sex faster and easier with a
[24]
stranger than you can with your partner.
People do not gravitate to hard work, or more
difficulty. Faster is king and queen of the
spiritual realm and relationships at the spiritual
realm last forever.
Let's not limit this conversation to sex.
Although we could easily do so. Let's add
wealth, lets add sport goals, and social
friendship roles, career ambitions and
humanitarian responsibilities. Do you think we
gravitate toward or away from things that slow
those down? We gravitate away - it's the Soul
of Humanity to strive toward betterment, a
better world, a better life, better strength to
contribute - which often means more
simplicity, more technology, more refined
process. It NEVER means more trouble, more
difficulty and certainly not, longer periods of
waiting. NEVER.
So, the first key to Sustainable Loving
Relationship, is FASTER. Faster recovery from
emotional upset, faster process toward your
goals (include financial), faster process for
sexual and personal pleasure and more of your
ambitions achieved in a shorter period of time.
Link this to your relationship and you'll have
magnetism. Find a disconnect and you'll start
to lose the libido and communication that
makes love grow.
Neutral is good. Some people report
happy relationships that don't inspire
greatness or operate to make their ambitions
come FASTER, but that don't distract them,
and therefore are, satisfactory and that's all
they wanted from a relationship, no distraction.
In other words not positive was ok, as long as
there was no negative. Usually, in these
situations children are involved and a
caretaking responsibility was of some value.
I can however, list a thousand cases
where, in the desire for a better relationship,
one or both partners have actually put the
brakes on their partner's ambitions in career or
sport or fun, or even philanthropic ambitions,
and as such killed the relationship. One lady,
partnered a guy who was an aspiring musician
with a great full time job to pay his lifestyle.
She bought into his life romance and
inspiration which added value to his ambition
to be a great musician but she was so
emotionally self absorbed, his mind and heart
we continually distracted by her emotional
upset over her children (past marriage), her ex,
her life, her health, that in spite of the love that
guy had for her, he just drew down to protect
his SOUL mission of music. This is nature,
protecting her own.
THE SECOND STEP TO SUCCESSFUL
RELATIONSHIPS IS - BETTER
COMPARISON is Nature. Nature
compares, so do you. The minute you compare
your partner to another person and think that
the other person would be a better partner
than the one you're with, you're unhappy. And
that's the end of it.
Comparison is critical but the outcome is
not predetermined. It's you. If you're generous,
positive, kind and appreciative of your partner
every other person who comes into range of
sight, touch, smell, thought, sound, tastes
must be subordinate to them. That's it,your
partner is BETTER than all your other options.
and you do have many including being single.
Compromise means others would be
better and that's the most relationship killing,
libido depreciating, personally rejecting, heart
closing, head banging state of mind a human
can bring to another person. You're second
best and I'm prepared to suffer it. That's
compromise, and it's the first nail in the coffin
of happiness.
This relationship you are in has to be
perceived as far better than anything else. If
you perceive being single as better than this
relationship, then you're depreciating the
person you're with and hurting them
subconsciously. If you're thinking that
compromise is ok, then just wait and see how
those thoughts eventually sabotage your
relationship.
Being in this relationship must be
perceived as the best place for you to be. No
seconds or thirds. It achieves this status
because you choose to think those things, and
if you choose not to, then the end is near,
eventually.
BETTERMENT is the Deeper Spirit of
relationship and if this relationship isn't the
best betterment, then it won't last unless you
change your mindset.
If you don't get this one, then something
is really wrong. People come to a relationship
to me BETTER. They don't come to a
relationship to SUSTAIN what they already
have. Whatever they had outside or before this
relationship or could have without this
relationship, needs to be IMPROVED by this
relationship. BETTER is MAGNETISM and
nobody will cheat or defeat BETTER.
THE THIRD LINK - HAPPY
We all know that "making someone
happy" is impossible. An unhappy person is
unhappy and no relationship on earth is going
to change that, right? We are on the same
page? Most people think a relationship is
going to make them happy, but that's a week,
month or a year at the tops. Unhappy people
are unhappy, in and out of a relationship. Oh,
and by the way, Happy people don't get
Unhappy because of the relationship. The fact
is some people just don't know how unhappy
they are until they get into a relationship that
cuts off their escape routes.
So, here's the real rub for long term
relationship success in Happiness.
YOU HAVE TO BE HAPPY.. Yeah baby,
it's you. Not your partner, not your relationship,
that's nothing to do with it. YOU have to be
happy and the most important thing you have
to be happy about, is nothing.
Now, you might be confused, so, here's a
bit more information on this. Being happy
because you get, got, have, or had something
is physical and understandable so lets label
that PLEASURE. Pleasure of the physical
nature can come and go, as we all know. So,
it's really dumb to label HAPPY with the
derivation of pleasure. If pleasure comes and
goes, then so will our happiness. We're like a
donkey chasing a carrot on a stick or a cat
chasing its tail. This is a definite burnout model
for relationships.
HAPPY people ARE HAPPY. No cause.
So, HAPPY in relationship means HAPPY
in LIFE means HAPPY in SELF. A miserable
person might be attracted to a Happy
relationship but eventually that misery, that
internal emotional dialogue infects the
relationship and that's the end of romance.
People become as you think about them.
If you're appreciating your partner,
appreciating them (BETTER) and seeing that,
they are helping you live your DESTINY
FASTER you have the first part of successful
relationship. But the third element, HAPPY, has
nothing to do with your partner or your
RELATIONSHIP.
Happy is up to you and it is, without
question, the most challenging.
We think that Making Someone Happy,
will make them want to be with us. That's is
not exactly true. If we are already happy before
we meet someone, then everything we do will
make them happy, it's infectious. But if we are
not happy and we try to make others happy,
[25]
the real hope is that by making them happy,
they'll return the favour. This fails.
The most Narcisistic thing we can do is to
CHANGE OTHERS TO MAKE THEM HAPPY.
The most ultruistic thing we can do is to
CHANGE OURSELVES TO BE HAPPY,
because this happiness is infectious and then,
it doesn't matter so much how we serve the
world - our happiness guarantees goodness
comes from it.
This is ironic because rather than
changing your partner, trying to make them
happy, you swing it around and choose to
make you happy without things. In other words
happy without a BECAUSE.
If you find yourself saying, I am happy
today, because.....a, b, c, d, then you've just
created the opportunity to sink in unhappiness
without .....a, b, c, d.
Your happiness - no matter what
happens, leads to the best relationship and all
the great spiritual literature the emotion you
show toward someone is actually what you get
back, so, if you're happy, really happy -
regardless - then that is the most powerful way
to cause their happiness.
Article: HAPPY, BETTER, FASTER - FIVE POINTS OF CONTACT
When we meet someone and merge into
a relationship there are certain attractions we
are not aware of, and as these discount, we
lose that original attraction. Then relationships
fail.
I can list for you those original attractions,
they come from five contact points of
relationship. Any one contact point can cause
attraction but all have influence. So, for
example, we might enter a relationship based
on one of the five contact points, then, all the
other four are not important. As long as we
sustain the intensity of that one contact point
we can live without the others. But over time,
that living without, is almost impossible.
1. Contact Point One: FASTER - Animal or
Physical Attraction.
We have five senses and each sense has
criteria to accept or reject people. This is an
individual thing, what one person accepts at a
sensory level another might reject. The animal,
or physical attraction between two people can
therefore cause relationship, and as long as
there is quality control in that area, it will
remain a strong sense of magnetism between
two people.
Animal Attraction of Smell: Body smells,
perfumes, hair, after shave, sox, breath - the
sense of smell is not so much given credit for
its power of attraction but it is powerful in
causing rejection. Smell is the first and most
powerful subconscious trigger to turn off,
animal attraction. I once dated a lady with
breath similar to a donkeys bum, she was an
amazing woman but I just couldn't sustain
attraction to her.
Animal Attraction of Sight: We have in our
mind's eye, a series of criteria that make us
attracted to or repelled from another person.
Sometimes we get attracted by what we see,
and then it changes and we lose it. I once lost
interest at a physical level with a woman I was
dating when she deliberately shaved her head.
Seems trivial but.... it's an individual thing.
Animal Attraction of Taste: Although we
think about our taste buds on the tip of our
tongue, they also extend to our taste in
clothes, furniture, cars, seats on planes,
luggage, shoes and much much more. So,
there's an enormous need for some level of
diversity with harmony in taste. In other words
if a person's choices are repelling then we can
say they're not going to be attractive to us.
Animal Attraction of Touch: When some
people put their hand on yours it feels fantastic
and tingles go up your spine, when others
touch you, you feel invaded and cold. The
power of touch in animal attraction is very
important. One lady I dated sweated so much
from her hands you could take a bath in the
them, her touch was always clammy, and
although she was a wonderful soul, I couldn't
really hold animal attraction to her.
Animal Attraction of Sound: Have you
heard the sound of a winging moaning
complaining voice - sometimes these voices
emanate from one country or another, and this
can be extremely repelling at an animal
attraction level. The sounds of attraction also
include the footsteps, the way they put things
down, or move about the house, even closing
a car door is a sound associated with
attraction. Of course, music is obvious. It is
important to feel a harmony with the sounds
another person makes. Rarely does this
attraction to sound include flatulence and
belching.
2. Contact Point Two - BETTER -
Attraction on Mental levels
The mental level of attraction between
two people is a vital ingredient of relationship
because it underpins, romance, authenticity,
attitude and respect. Mental level of
relationship comes from COMPARISON. We
will always compare who we are with in
relationship to others. If we wish to sustain a
healthy relationship that comparison must
always result in a NEGATIVE. In other words
our partner is BETTER that anyone else we
continually compare them to. Some people are
afraid of this comparison, but it is
subconscious, and if ever we allow that
comparison to be POSITIVE, in other words
our perception is that the person we see looks,
feels, smells, acts and contribution in our life IS
BETTER THAN our partner, our attraction to
our partner on the mental plane will be gone
and all that is left for us in this relationship is to
fall back into the physical level of attraction.
All affairs are started as a result of the
loss of ANIMAL or MENTAL Attraction.
3. Contact Point Three - FASTER -
Attraction in Money
Although a couple may come together
with vastly different wealth, it is in money
SPENDING that there needs to be a harmony
that causes attraction. This spending must be
in some harmony, and this is triggered by
AMBITION. One person with a high ambition to
build wealth and another with no ambition, or a
smaller ambition to build wealth will struggle to
sustain a relationship at this level. One client
met a partner and they found incredible
compatibility in ambition. However, one person
was happy when their net worth reached $1
million dollars, that was their dream, the other
was dreaming of $20 million, and so their
spending patterns became radically in conflict.
Once I started a business partnership with my
relationship partner and we built a successful
business but she was content with what I
thought was just the beginning of a huge
opportunity, and we lost inspiration to work
together and this, which was part of our
original attraction, faded our attraction.
4. Contact Point Four - HAPPY -
Attraction through Emotion and Love
Many people are very over committed to this
level of attraction in relationship and as such it
is the most common cause for attraction and
loss of attraction. It is incredibly simple to
understand why there are so many problems.
First, we are attracted to people whose
emotion toward us is how we want to feel. If,
for example, if they are impressed with us, we
want to feel impressive. If they are nurturing
toward us we're attracted because we want to
[26]
feel nurtured. But there's a problem. The
emotion we have toward others becomes the
emotion they have toward us, and a person
who is keen to have some impression
showered on them, is obviously being very
hard on themselves, or if the person is needing
nurturing then they are obviously not very
nurturing so, the emotional attraction soon -
very soon - flips - because people treat us with
the same emotion that we treat them, and we
treat people with the same emotion we treat
ourselves. There is a massive amount of work
people invest in this one area alone, trying to
change each other, or even choosing
"religious" correct emotions to treat each other
when, it could simply be pickled down into
"treat others as you want to be treated."
Ultimately, emotions are energy and the
synthesis of all emotions is Love.
5. Contact Point Five - HAPPY -
Attraction through SOUL
From a very early age we create the
prince or princess we hope to meet in our life.
Each time we meet "the greatest love I've ever
felt" we meet another piece of that puzzle
called SOUL MATE. It's cumulative, we meet
someone, find 20% of our SOUL MATE image,
break up, meet the next LOVE OF MY LIFE -
and now, there's 30%. The time it takes to
meet, merge, discover the incomplete missing
bits and move on, varies between a few weeks
and for some, a lifetime. I know of couples who
boast 40 years together, but, the reason they
stayed was, that they learned to compromise.
The Quest For SOUL MATE is natural. The
interesting thing about SOUL MATE level of
connection with another person is that it has
no rational foundation in any of the previous
four levels and, takes no time. I met my first
wife, when I was 19 years old and knew within
seconds that she was "THE ONE" - actually
she was around 50% of my Princess Soul
mate, and I knew that after 6 weeks. Thirteen
years later, we divorced.
There are some closing comments:
When one level begins to crumble, the
solution is to drop down to the next lower
level. If Soul Connection begins to fade, drop
to emotion, if emotion and love begins to fail
drop to Money, if money attraction and
ambition begin to fail drop to mental
comparison, if mental comparison begins to
fail, drop to physical and if physical begins to
fail, RUN.
Article: Relationships and Happiness
Comparison is human, it seems at some
primal level of our hard wired DNA, we do
compare what we've got to what we could
have and when, what we've got is not as good
as what we could have, we either set out to get
what we want, or go into a denial like, "oh, I
can live without it."
In relationship however, that comparison,
if left to our adventurous nature, will always
lead to disappointment. When we're with the
one (in relationship) we want the many and
when we're with the many (single) wanting the
one (relationship).
The reason for this is in your partner's
But. And the bigger it is, the better. You see
when our partner compares us to someone
else, there may be bits and pieces of us that
they can find BETTER in another person -
however, the most important word they'll say is
BUT. But you have everything else better. Like
BUT you you have a better mind or heart. The
Bigger the BUT the better.
Where ever there is no big BUT you have
to construct that. It's not magic that two
people get into a good healthy relationship. It
comes from good marketing. For example: if
you and your partner do not connect on the
Financial plane, negotiate and give your
partner the feedback. What you're actually
saying is that "My BUT, between you and
someone else, is not big enough" - We're
always comparing our partner on all five planes
and the financial, emotional, and soulful levels
are absolutely negotiable.
Physical connection is not so negotiable.
If you don't like the smell, or look of your
partner, it's hard to fake it, BUT you can say
"other people look or smell better BUT you are
still my imperfect - perfect partner."
Comparisons that Don't result in a BIG
BUT (in other words when your partner seems
less attractive on one or more of the planes of
contact than others) is not saying you're going
to run for cover is it. It's not saying you should
have an affair or break the relationship, is it?
What it's saying is that if you leave the
negative comparison in place, and continue
thinking, "there is someone better out there for
me" you'll eventually manifest it and prove
yourself right.
An interesting thing about comparison is
that you can compare your partner to an ideal
fantasy partner. That comparison might be to
someone you saw in the movies or a memory
of someone dead, or someone you dreamed
up out of a novel, or worse still, a self help guru
who presented only half their real personality.
So, sometimes we sabotage relationship
because the comparison is to a fictitious
human, rather than a real one.
Comparison can be to someone you
really think you know - like a lover in an affair
where you meet only the physical and don't
get to really know them on all levels.
Comparison can be to someone you used to
know and where enough time has passed for
you to forget the crap you had to deal with in
that relationship.
The result of comparison is not random.
It's a habit. If, for example, your mother or
father or brother or sister or best friend or ex
partner criticises your partner to you, they are
trying to compete with your comparison. They
are trying to win the competition between them
and your partner and this is a strong
mechanism for sabotage if you buy into it.
That's not saying what they're doing is wrong,
it's saying that the more you infatuate your
partner - by making them better than anyone
else you know, the more those who think they
own your ear and heart will try to knock them
off. Just listen and laugh to yourself.
The key to connection on the emotional
plane is human consciousness. If your partner
says "GOT TO" all the time, even though they
meditate, bend up their own backside in yoga,
or do Tai chi with Master WONG-NUMBER, the
are the unconscious incompetents... In other
words they are emotionally in the mud but on
another plane, maybe physical, doing
consciously thank you.
Consciousness - emotion - is determined
by our circumstance and our reaction to them.
The best way to stay connected to your
partner in consciousness is to learn the art of
capitulation.
Being right, getting it right, having right
opinions, doing it like I know is right, right
behaviour, right action, right intent, right
process - that's unconscious. Capitulation
means, maybe there's an alternative road.
Unity in relationship does not come from
similar process or similar beliefs - that's
individuality that must be maintained. Process
must contradict otherwise two people become
one, and then one of them isn't necessary.
However, what does matter is where you
spend most of your time on the consciousness
tree.
[27]
When you ask - Should I stay or Should I
go in relationship there's a huge opportunity to
do some powerful and deep spiritual
exploration in your own heart and soul. Simply,
by working out how to make your BUT bigger
you grow as a human, heal past blocks and
move into the future. That BUT simply says - "I
compare you to others and they might have
some bits and pieces that are better than you,
BUT, you are better, everywhere else that
matters....
The astonishing insight here, is that in
nature's law, nothing is ever missing, so in fact,
the one you're with has everything you want
10/10 it just maybe in a different form to what
you want. It is, in fact in the form you need. So,
who you're with is the IMPERFECT - PERFECT
PARTNER. And until you can see it, you'll
always be wanting what you haven't got, which
is the cause of suffering. Instead, if you learn to
appreciate what you've got (THE MIND
PLANE) the way that you've got it, you'll be
100% guaranteed to get what you want, the
way that you want it.
That's the great teaching in Relationship.
Always look for a bigger BUTT...
Article: Five Planes of Love
The Animal or Physical plane involving all
five senses in Physical Attraction.
The Mental Plane - Attraction involving
the essence of Comparison
The Monetary Plane - Attraction involving
Ambition and Intention (Equally Ambitious for
Betterment)
The Psychic or Love Plane
- Attraction involving emotion -
operating at the same
consciousness
The Spirit Plane - Involving
Soul. A familiarity that forms
no attraction but a knowing.
We can fall in love and
hold love for another person
on any one plane and on
that basis enter a relationship.
A relationship does not require a
multiple layer connection, however, as
time goes on, the other layers will become
challenges if they are not, in some ways,
causing attraction.
In my experience entry to most
relationships is on one plane and gets stuck,
where one or both individuals in the
relationship is stuck. For example: a person
can feel attraction on a physical level, animal
attraction but as soon as the issue of ambition
or emotional consciousness comes up, they
might lose attraction and say, "this relationship
is not for me."
So, a successful long term relationship
requires investment at all five levels - even
though, the original glue might be just one. I
remember meeting a partner who I can say I
was soul bonded to, but physically, psychic,
mentally I was not and I didn't have the brains
to sort all that out, so we split up, unattracted
to each other, or at least, me to her.
The area I'd like to discuss today is
comparison. Some people think it's rude to ask
yourself this question, "Is there someone better
for me?" To compare who you are with
to others who might be making themselves
available or not.
But the reality is that if the answer is yes,
you have a problem, and it's better to be
conscious of that than living in some state of
delusion that you'll get over it because actually,
it gets worse.
In a healthy relationship you might say
YES, that person would be better for me, BUT
- they have a connection in one area that's
stronger than what I currently have, but might
not be as strong in an area we currently excell
in.
Couple I work with are usually in the YES,
there's a better partner out there for me, and
considering separation. I asked them to go
through the five planes of attraction and tell me
where they excelled as a couple and where
that one area might be really hard to replicate.
***********Articles By: Chris Walker
HUMAN NATURE - TRUE NATUArticles from Blog at www.chriswalkeronline.com
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