Indian Bridegroom

8/3/2019 Indian Bridegroom

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1

I am Mr X. That was how my colleagues call me.

At one time they caught me using variables which end with X(for example maX,seX) and started calling me as X since then.

I am restless since morning.I need a long break. Break from grueling work.

A lot of people think that working in AC room is like staying in paradise. It is not.Every day is a 32 hour schedule.

It is a sedentary job on a 100 degree hot pan.We hardly experience the warmness of sun and coolness of moon.

I am working in a financial company called Lambda.

Only a mathematician can understand the true meaning of Lambda. It has directrelationship with the finance domain.

Lambda is an US based company, owned by an Indian.

Market crashed yesterday. Stock exchange index has fallen by 2000 points. Humans create problems and struggle to solve these problems.

It is morning 2:30 A.M. We don't find people working late night in USA except Indians/Chinese.

My colleagues are working so hard to correct the output of 3rd eye project in orderto match with current market. We have no idea if we still be employed or fired bytomorrow.

My friend cum colleague, Pull Royal, referred me in Lambda. For referring me, he got 10K dollars as a bonus, which is equivalent to 5000 beerbottles in Indian currency.

By the way, his actual name is Royyala pullaya.

He learnt in school days that when we are in Rome, we should be like Romans.

On the basis of this philosophy, he changed his name as per U.S. But still hispassport has the old name :)

I am going home, pull. Are you coming?.

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4/46

I have to finish one more task. You carry on. said pull. We did post graduation together college and we were roomies since then. We were living twenty miles away from the office.

One cant explain how a bachelors room would be?

We clean it whenever any girl or elders visit. Until then, it will be a universal dustbin.

2

Tringgg! Tringgg!... I placed my 1kg weighty arm on top of the alarm to stop itssound.

Today is august 15th. I celebrate this day every year, not because it is theIndependence Day for Indians but it is my birthday according to 10th classcertificate

I have lived for a quarter century alone on this earth. Its a good time to getmarried.

But no one was there to find a girl for me.

I am an orphan.

Hey pull. Get up, we should go to office.

Wake me up after after... snoring sound!!!

We got a beautiful girl in our company`.

When, where is she from? pull suddenly woke up with so much curiosity.

I laughed. Pull threw a pillow on me and slept.

It is expected that every company has at least one girl as an employee.But mine is a male jungle.

My boss is so cruel on us by not hiring even a single woman.

He has been covering his baldness with a black wig, which matches with his facecolor exactly. He is a black Indian geek with silver shining teeth.

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5/46

Whenever his wife gets angry, at least one tooth will come out The old timid slave is a great mathematician and a fore-teller of stock prices.

I reached office early. By that time, my project leader Suresh has already arrived.

I asked Hi Suresh, How are the stock prices today?

He said More or less, they are matching with third eye output.

What a good news it is!We should have drinks today.

Third eye project was developed by my boss and no one had access to thatsoftware.

Life with Divya

3

Current strength in Lambda is 99.

we are very excited to know who that 100th employee is? Is it going to be a girl? If so, can she be comfortable in a company with only male employees?

My boss had no idea on how to keep the working environment beautifully.

In our tea talk, we decided that the 100th employee should be a female andshouldnt have a boy friend.

My colleagues went mad.

Few colleagues even hired a detective to cross-check if any female applicant has a

boy friend or not.

Few others were contacting astrologers with applicants personal details to knowmore about her compatibility with them.

Few more were betting each other on color/culture/structure of the girl.After all, our daily job in Lambda, trading, is one kind of betting.

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It was obvious that any guy would look for female companion.

Why doesnt my boss realize the need of 99 employees?

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Another day in my life had started. Office life is too boring. My feet were not willingto step towards the office.

My eyes caught a beautiful girl in white dress. She looked like an Angel.

She is going on a elevator. The elevator is far away from me to catch. I wavedhands, but she didnt look at me and she disappeared as the lift took her quickly.

My heart is suddenly filled with lot of energy after looking at her. Where is sheworking in this big building? I guess this building has more than 10 companies.

I am not so desperate about women. But life is colorful with girlfriends.

I slowly stepped towards my desk. It is always filled with lot of papers.

I have to finish bunch of tasks before I leave today.What a boring life.

Hi, I am Divya and I am your new team mate Divya introduced herself.

You? white dress girl?

All other employee eyes were on me.Sorry, those were not on me, on Divya.

'My colleagues might have written a 1MB text file to describe her by now'.

In short, she is slender, has a round face, loose light brownish hair, light reddishcolored lips; and her white complexion made her look more beautiful. More or less,she resembles Emma watson.

She came in white color coat and black color pants. Like her dress combination,every human has good and bad shadows.

I didnt respond to her question.

She asked another question to interrupt my silence.

Are you an Indian? with a little bit louder voice

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Yes, yes... I am from Andhra Pradesh. I told.

I asked What about you?

Divya said Well, my native place is somewhere in India. Now, my family and I arestaying in dinky town

To continue the conversation, I said I did M.S in USA. This is my first job. Youare the first beautiful employee that I am working with

Divya smiled at me and took her seat.

It is very difficult for a single girl to be around an office with full of guys.

She cant share gossips with us as she does with her girlfriends.

Among the 99 employees, I am the luckiest guy. Divya is my team mate.

Unfortunately, this miss beauty had to report to a 1970s mentality, Suresh, projectleader.

He doesnt look at girls and never gossips about them. He is an exact replica of myboss.' In a span of 2 years, he became project leader.

He is on duty 24X7. He is a work-juicic. He drinks only juices, no alcohol.

She repeated her first question when I was staring at her.

What is your name?

I am X.

X? is it your real name? Divya asked.

It is a long story. My real name is... I forgot.

Aah, please tell me Divya said.'I am Bala Subrahmanyam.'

'Okay then, I will call you as Balu.' Divya said.

What a sweet name and sweet voice too. I gave my hand to thank Divya.

'First touch... her hand is so soft'

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8/46

I wished that my relationship with Divya lead go to marriage.

All other employees were whispering to each other.On that day, I saw a bit of change in my life because of an Angel.

My boss and Suresh used to be topic of the company. On that day, I was, for onebeautiful reason.

As soon as Divya left office, Pull started shouting, Balu, Balu...

Everybody laughed at me.

Balu, Should we go home? pull asked. I said I am not used to this name. But when you are calling me Balu, it is not assweet as when Divya calls.

Thats the magic of beauty, dude pull said.

Since then, I was more interested in coming early to office and staying late.

'Office is not a boring place when we have beautiful girls around us. I decorated mycabin with plastic flowers.'

5Suresh assigned me the task to training Divya about Lambdas infrastructure andprojects.

I was very happy and called Divya to conference room to take sessions.

Divya, Our daily life starts from 9 A.M. Trading exchange opens at 10 A.M. Brokersbuy and sell stocks according to our predictions.

We have one magical project, third eye, which helped us to get jobs in thiscompany.

This project takes news/data in some specific format and predicts future stockprices.

'Our job is to collect the news, previous days stock prices, current day transactionsand provide them as input to the third eye. If something goes wrong with theprediction, we need to back track what made the output incorrect and reconcileinput till predictions match with current prices. '

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9/46

Divya interrupted and said Should we take a break and talk somethinginteresting.

I whispered to myself Do you have any boy friend?

The whole world is bothering about scarcity of jobs but not that of single beautifulgirls.

Divya asked what is your plan for the weekend?

I said suresh gave me work and have to finish by this weekend.

I heard he is so cruel. He doesnt give good ratings, hikes. But work has to bedone with very strict deadlines She said loudly.

I didnt want to spoil precious moments with Divya by talking about that machine.

I asked what is her plan on this weekend? She said I would go shopping. I still have some joining bonus money left.

I asked On what else do you spend money apart from shopping?

She replied Ahaaa, it is a big question. But it has cute answer. I spend them ontaking my boy friend to movies.

I was a bit jealous.To hide my facial expressions, I said Yuk. Your boy friend makes you spend

money? She replied that she was kidding.

I felt that I still have luck. After that I continued my session on technology.

She said bye to me when she was leaving.She got 99 byes in reply (including mine) and also few flying kisses to Divya. Divyaleft the office with a smile.

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On monday morning, Divya came with one more cute pink teddy bear.

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I dont get why girls like inanimate dolls and hug them while sleeping when thereare many boys jumping around them and ready to hug.

I thought of asking who gifted this. It must be from one of my colleagues.

Not just teddy bears, she might have received many love proposals too.

I knew that I was the last in that race. However, I should give 100% of my focus.

'She would have more advantages if she marries me.'

'Firstly, she wont have mother-in-law.Another one, I could do her work also. Last and an important one is the money thatshe spends on shopping would be doubled (including my salary).'

Rakesh, one of senior colleagues, called me to his cabin. He held my shirt collar andwarned me that I had to stay away from to Divya.

Other guy sent me a mail saying that he got a dream in which he married divya.Hence, I should treat Divya as my sister.

'After receiving few more warnings from my colleagues, I decided to learn martialarts in order to protect myself.'

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My boss presented all of us a new year gift, a watch. They were specially made byTITAN on an order. We were happy when he announced it, but instead of showing the time, it displaysreal time stock price info for a ticker.Boss wanted us to be updated everywhere about prices.

All our hikes, salary depend on the profit we make.

Working in a financial company is a big risk because we dont know when we willlose the job. But the pay is high, which confirms to the maxim higher the risk,higher the returns.

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That day was a very very bad day in both Divyas and my life.

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When she went to a bathroom, Suresh also went silently inside the bathroom andmisbehaved with her. She screamed until the security guards went to protect herfrom Suresh.

Immediately she left the office.

Later, Suresh locked himself in a bathroom and didnt come out till the evening. Myboss scolded him from outside the bathroom. I felt very sad for Divya.

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I called Divya many times later but she didnt answer.

'Two weeks were over. She hadnt come to office.'

I took her address from the HR person and went to meet her.

I saw marriage arrangements at her home.

I went directly to Divyas room. I tried to convince her not to marry as a reaction towhat had happened. She didnt listen to me.

'Divya, I know it is not right time to tell about this.Since I met you, I have feelings for you.'

She rose from her seat and showed me the path to get out.

I tried to speak; she stopped me with her hand and said You guys wont change.

You dont know how to treat women respectfully. You think women are there onlyfor sex.

I felt very bad and came out without saying another word.

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12/46

How I saved Lambda

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It was night 10 PM. I reached a pub called heaven.

One week passed by since I spoke with Divya and I haven't been to office sincethen. 'Drinking throughout night and sleeping during day.'

Roughly, I am following Indian time table in America.

Few people come to pub to watch strippers, few others come for gambling, andhave drinks.

But I went there to forget Divya.

I read stories regarding Devdas and few other famous fellas who sacrificed their lifefor women.

I never expected that I would come under the list.

I ordered my favorite drink ice cold Hennessey on the rocks and had one peg.

It was a big surprise; my Boss came and sat beside me.

I thought he came to know about my love failure and came there to soothe me. Buthe also ordered a peg of my favorite.

Then, I changed flow of thoughts. I guess he must have got beaten by his wifeagain. I ordered another peg to competent with him.

And he ordered for another. I ordered another to peg to compete with him. I took 5and he took 7 pegs.

Instead of ordering another peg, my boss slapped me hardly.

Boss said Are you competing with me Suresh? and he gave another slap.

I shacked my head to realize what was going on.

Boss started weeping 'I worked very hard to develop 3rd eye. my future, and livesof 100 employees are getting destroyed.

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If you want to grow, go and develop your own. But not by stealing others work.'

Boss fell down and murmured.

I didnt know what had happened.

I dropped my boss at his home.

I went to my office. It was 2 AM.

I havent seen pull since last week because of the change in my time table.

I called pull.Pull said in sleeping voice who is this?

I said It is me. Balu

pull said Wait. I will open door?

I said No. I am at office. What happened at our office?

He explained the whole story Suresh had stolen the version of 3rd eye softwareand destroyed whole of its learning.

And at a time 40 employees had shifted to his new company.

Then, I understood the words of my boss and his gloomy.

I felt that I should help my boss and also want to take revenge on suresh.

I looked at 3rd eye output of yesterday. Numbers were not at all matching withthose of stock exchange.

How should I correct the output of 3rd eye?

I looked for backup of the training data?

I did try to correct to some extent. But it is very huge. Obscenely, it would take 4-6 months to feed the whole data again

It is 7 AM on Sunday morning.

'I want to arrange meeting with department heads.'

I called up systems head. After 4 rings, he answered his phone.

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I said Hi Bhanu, can you come to office at 9AM. I have a plan to recover revenuesof our company

He said No. I am preparing my resume. I want to shift.

I requested him Bhanu, please dont do this now. Give me one more week time. Iwill make sure we all will have jobs. Just one week.

He agreed and came at 9AM.

Similarly, I called up HR head, 3rd eye project head, and Recruiter head.

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I took all of them to a conference room.

Hi all, as you all know, we are in a hard phase. You might have your own plans tofight against this. I was just asking your one weeks time. Please post pone yourplans of resigning this job for a week. I would make sure we all will have our jobsand better profits

HR head asked about my plan. I thanked him and explained my plan.

I asked the systems head to provide Sureshs last month web and computer

activities and also his passwords if possible.Asked HR to provide all personal information about him.

And ordered recruiters head to place an ad to recruit white hackers in Newyorktimes.

3rd Eye team head and I prepared a plan to correct 3rd eye output.

Our aim is to optimize learning process by making it a distributed system.

Next day, we got couple of resumes for the new job. We called them immediatelyand asked to attend an interview.

I took all applicants to cafeteria. I gave a laptop and assigned an employee(toobserve their work) to each and asked them to crack the Lambdas external website.

Among all applicants, I liked triloks work. He graduated from U of Florida.

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He got the IP address of server which serves the web site. Then, with multitude of repeated requests, hogged the server. If there is too much of hogging, codeautomatically restarts the whole server. While starting, the server gets new IPaddress using DHCP. There he inserted memory resident program, which helpedhim to gain passwords.

We immediately hired and asked him to come to work the next day.

Mean while, the team head and I had written a wrapper over 3rd eye to learnstrategies from multiple computers. Estimated learning time got reduced from 4-6months to 1.5 to 2 weeks.

That means it was 8 times efficient. We can apply this to several other exchanges.This means we can get more profits.

Trilok and I started on cracking Sureshs company website. My hunch was that hemight use the same infrastructure.

Though we brought down his site, it didnt come back up.We waited for two days to get server restarted.During these two days, we tried passwords, formed from his personal information.After restart of the server, we got passwords. I destroyed the learnings of 3rd eyeand corrupted its code.

I was very happy. I made things upside down. Tomorrow onwards, Suresh will have hard time.I didnt want to spoil his life. But I think he deserves this punishment because of hisbad and crooked attitude.

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I came home. I hardly slept last week. I immediately fell asleep.

Boss woke me up by knocking hard at my door.As soon as I opened door, he hugged me with lot of happiness.

I looked at watch. I slept for 14 hours at a stretch.

Heads of all teams started congratulating me.Boss said we got profits five times than usual day

Boss asked me What do you want?

I said First, Lets have drinks

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16/46

We had few pegs together.

Pull explained why I hadn't come to office when Divya left.

Then, I started crying How can she reject me? I have a good salary, good boss.

Boss straightened his back and broadened his lips to show his smile.

I continued my sobbing I dont know why she rejected me.

Everyone started consoling my pain in their way. I felt all their responses are moreor less related to their work.

Systems head

Dont worry Balu.

She doesnt have good physique.

I am sure you deserve more beautiful and lovely girl.

I thought that he was applying computer assembly principles on womens body.

Recruiters head said when you loose one person. You should get another person.

Boss said is she the only boy... sorry girl, who matches your interests.

I said no. there can be many

He said Then, look for others. I am sure you will get one. However, dont ever tryto marry Americans. Their culture is different.They may not stick to one person in their life.

I asked what to do now?

All unanimously said Find a traditional girl from your culture.

Accountant head said girls are in a race for you and winner will be your wife. Divyawas disqualified in that race.

Boss said that I look like mini-monk and asked me to shave my beard first.

Thats true.

If I continue like this, after a months time, I can establish my own ashram. Thisprofession will be more profitable, less work than a software job.

Recruiters head gave marriage bureau's phone number, run by Haridwar.

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Divya called me on the next day to say sorry for her harsh words that day.

I said 'I could understand what your situation was.'

And then, she said I heard you became hero. Our boss told me. I am sure you willget a better person in your life.

Searching bride in India

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Am I speaking to Haridwar?

Haridwar said "Yes. I am NRI marriage broker. I sell NRI boys to Indian girls. Whatcan I do for you?"

I was looking for a homely, lovely girl and she should have parents, at least onebrother, and sister.

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"Technology is not yet improved in India to produce children without parents" harisaid and chuckled.

"Ok, I have many matches with that background. So, it is not an issue.

And one more thing, I charge 1k in dollars. It is not refundable. For everyweakness, you need to pay 1/2k dollars extra. is it fine?" said hari withcommanding tone.

Yes. I am fine.

"By the way, what is your name? " asked hari.

"I am Bala subrahmanyam".

"what about last name?" hari asked curiously.

Hmm. My surname is Bhaarat.

"He he.." hari laughed very loudly.

I felt that earth was shaking in US because of his laughter in India.

"I can tell your full history" said hari.

I was more intrigued. And asked How?

Hari said "You like sky blue color. Your favorite word is mother. You are looking for

love as much as a person in dessert looking for water.For your information, My surname is also Bharat and I was born in Haridwar, India"

What a coincidence. I said

"From now onwards, we are brothers. Don't worry brother, I will look for a goodmatch. send me full biodata to my mail [email protected]" hari saidand cut the call.

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"Brother, when are you coming to India?. This is a marriage season." asked hari.

In a week?

"Thats good. I will catch you at hyderbad airport." hari said.

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19/46

Though hari lives in India, He keeps himself abreast of latest changes in USA. Afterseveral chats with him, I came to know that he studied software engineering andwas working as marriage broker for living.

Hari uses facebook to find grooms abroad. He makes business by observing humanpsychology. If any person updates his facebook profile with new job or frustratedwith Phd etc etc. Hari sends his marriage pamphlet through message. They won'tconsider hari's message as spam as he is in their network.

He advertised on groupon to get more customers.

I was very happy for his keen business knowledge.

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"Yo Yo brother" hari said in telangana english accent at one of our richest airports,hyderabad, in India. It was too crowdy. Many people in India are using flights than trains nowadays.

I noticed a small baby left alone and crying "mother... mother..."

I was moved. I asked her mother name. She hardly speaks.

I immediately went to police counter and gave my details so her mother can contact me.

"Brother, give her to police. They will take care of her" hari suggested.

I said No, Hari. I can't leave this kid. I don't like to see any body struggles likeme.

I went to several counters to check whether her mother came to buy any item. Atlast, I found. She was in a bangle store. I scolded her for leaving her kid.

This is the best example to say that women forget the world when they areshopping.

"I like you brother" hari hugged me with lot of appreciation.

We raced towards hari's home. I don't like to stay in any hotel. Humans are socialanimals. I always like to stay with friends or ... Aaah.I didn't have any one other than friends.

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Hari was like my brother.

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Hari said "Brother, some times I come across funniest situations. Few girls look forgrooms by name. Recently one girl came and asked me whether I know any groomwith name Mahesh

For them, I simply use google search.

Nice one hari. I don't think any one uses social networking sites as best as youdo. I said

"Brother, should we go to movie?" hari asked.

I said No.

"Ok. I will take you to a spot where you can see many girls" hari said.

I said yes quickly to use this opportunity.

Hari laughed and took me to Prasads, one of the biggest multiplex theatres inhyderabad.

Looked like every girl in Andhra pradesh was there.

Different hair styles, dresses. Everyone was unique in their fancy costumes.We spent whole evening over there.

Hari ended the day with news that made me quite happy "Tomorrow, you are goingto see one girl"

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"I am sunitha. What about you?" asked sunitha

I said I am balu.

She was driving car as if she was driving flight. I was sure even a real pilot runsflight slower than her.

"Where are we heading" asked with a doubt of reaching destination

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21/46

sunitha answered with serene, "nagarjuna dam"

"I like travelling." sunitha added.

Did you buy this BMW recently?

she said that her fathers business is to sell BMW cars.

Ferrari is a dream car to many USAians. BMW is a dream car to Indians. This semipilot doesn't care about lives of other persons in her car.

I asked her "Should we go back?"

Immediately, she reverted me with a question "Don't you like me?"

I said "We are not made for each other."

She suddenly stopped her flight and asked me to get down.

I said Come on, I have only dollars. How can I go back?

"Thanks for the information. Now, I am feeling even better. Get down. I say"sunitha said harshly.

I immediately got down and told myself Instead of dying with astronaut, it is betterto walk back.

It took me half a day to come back to Hari's place. It made me feel like taking two/three rounds around earth.

After hearing my conversation with Sunitha, brother warned me that I should nevertell dislike on face. And then he narrated one old incident.

One of his customers went to see a girl. Her parents allowed her to talk with himprivately. She was cutting apple and giving him slices. After some point, he said "Idon't like you.". In the next second, instead of cutting apple, she cut his hand.

After hearing this tragic story, I felt this is one of the prime reasons for crime rategrowth in India.

But on a sentimental note, it is not good to hurt any girl by rejecting her on face.

On next day, I visited Lahari at her home in order to avoid another walkingexercises.

Lahari was cool.

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22/46

"are you staying in US" she asked.

I said Yes. I am staying in new york.

I asked Dont you like to stay in US?

"No, No. I want to. Everyday I have to fight with mother. I need peace. I want tostay away from my mother

When I come to US, I won't even call her." Lahari said in a sad tone.

I asked "what is the problem?" as if I will solve her problem

Since she was silent, I added please dont mind not sharing with me if it ispersonal

Then she said "My mother is not letting me go to pubs, tours etc. That's why I don'tlike her.

To change conversation, I asked her "what are you expecting from a husband"

"I have a big list" lahari said in enthusiastic tone

"My husband should take me to pub every day"

"He should take me to whatever place I like. I don't like getting flimsy reasons liketomorrow, next week, summer holidays etc"

To stop this ever going list, I asked her "should we meet some other time todiscuss this at length?"

I ended conversation in a peaceful manner instead of waging another war

When I was leaving, she shouted when are we meeting? I said "I will call you."

I reached home. Hari asked "How is lahari?"

I said No, I don't like her. She doesn't know the value of a relationship. She needsa driver who takes her to different places.

My phone is ringing...

It was unknown number. But when I heard that ring, I felt that someone bombedIndias neighbourhood country, china, to stop their growth.

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23/46

Sunitha called me. She apologized for abandoning me in the middle of road. Ithought instead of continuing the war, it was better to maintain friendship.

After my call with sunitha, Hari told me that he called sunitha and conveyed myrepentance for expressing my dislike.

And then, Hari said Forget all this brother. You are going to meet your fiancee,Hasini, tomorrow.

And hari started tingling me with joy.

18

A small orange colored sticker on the center of her forehead, black colored dyearound her eye, yellowish complexion, light reddish lipsticks, mix of skyblue andgreen color saree. Overall she used rainbow colors to makeup herself.

I should say, she was very beautiful and better than Divya structure wise.

On the whole, Hasini looked like a modern savitri, old telugu famous actor in 1980s.

But looks are deceptive.

I tried to introduce myself to her. But I couldnt spell a word. At last, I spoke fewwords but those were not clear.

I didnt know why I had felt nervous.

By looking at me, she said with a smile "I won't reject you. Don't worry".

I said "nice one" in relaxed manner

"My home is my world. I haven't gone out of my place till now." she said.

Her voice was so sweet. Lot many things she said afterwards.

"What about you?" she interrupted my dreams with a question.

I don't know where I was born. But I have a home in each town, orphanage.

My orphanage warden told me that my parents left me there.

I named myself. I have studied on scholarships. now I am working in Lambda, atrading company.

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she asked Who is Haridwar? is he not your brother?

I smiled.

he is also like me, an orphan, and we have similar ideologies about life.

"Ok. Is it fine if my parents stay with me?" she asked in a low sound.

I said "Big Yes"

I said "I am even ready to stay at your home after marriage."

We both laughed.

And she said thank you with a smile.

The conversation went on talking about friends, life etc.

suddenly she asked me whether I proposed to any one?

When I dont know what to say, I follow the route of Gandhi ji.

I told the truth, yes.

She asked "is her name Divya.?"

I was surprised.

I immediately asked was there any extra sensory connection between every girl onearth?

she laughed and said divya was her old childhood buddy.

Then, I recollected divya's words that her childhood kitty was in India.

I asked why didn't you break this suspense at the first moment?

she moved on to a different topic then. Hasini became so close to me within justone hour.

I knew she was my better half.

As soon as I came out of her home, I called up hari and said I fell in love.

"Brother, you are also cheating me." hari said with mourning voice.

I said that she was Hasini to soothe his sadness.

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25/46

"Thats good news. Lets have drink in the evening." hari said.

19

Hari took one peg and asked balu, how many universities did you opt for masters

I said six.

"Then why did you stuck with one option. Similarly, you should like at least twogirls and choose one." Hari posed this question to make me think.

I said This is life hari. We have one life, one wife.

I don't know all those balu. You have to see Ramya tomorrow. said and forcedme to visit another girl.

20

Ramya was a posh girl. She came in modern dress. She didnt give me a chance to

speak.Ramya said that she studied in NUS and planned to come to USA with B1 visa. Buther VISA got rejected.

she said "I don't like to meet any new person in my house. Because, I am a bituncomfortable."

She handed over the cup of coffee to me.

And she said "I like the coffee in Barista. I always meet my boyfriend over thereand have a cup of coffee together"

coffee was spilled over from my mouth when she said this.

"Are you alright? " Ramya asked with compassion.

I asked what about this arrangement?

She said that she had a break up with her boyfriend

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I said bye and she offered me to meet her at Barista at some other time.

I said okay and returned home.

Any how, after long search, I found my life partner, Hasini.

Love, Romance, Marriage

21

I called Hasini on next day morning.

She almost broke my heart.she said Her parents didnt like me much and looking for another King for her.

My heartbeat rose with anguish.

I asked why? Whats wrong with your parents?

She said Ok.. ok.. please dont cry.. I am just kidding :)

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27/46

I told her to stop jokes.

And then she asked when are we meeting?

I suggested dinner option.

She said How romantic and cut the call.It is very difficult to understand meaning of women words.

22

She ordered a chicken biryani.

I asked why only one. Am I here to just pay the bill? Then, she called and added a pepsi to order to make me more angry.

I whispered myself why god give sadistic brains to beautiful girls.

She said Dont scold me inside your head. I will not have lunch today.

I asked why.

Instead of answering my question, she started telling that her parents didnt reallylike me and tried for another groom because I proposed Divya.

When she said that reason, I was surprised.

I thought, Divya was suitable to me. I just proposed.

Was it a crime?

Should I need to change my name to Rama to convince your parents?

Okay, Okay cool down. she said to stop my arguments.

I convinced my parents. Dont worry much and be a gentle man she said.

Waiter placed pepsi over table. I asked her Are you not at all interested in havinglunch?

She moved her head in horizontal direction to say no.

I asked why?She said with smiles that she wished god to make me a good boy.So, she needs to do fastening to make that wish become true.

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Because of these endless fasts, we are able to export in good amounts of commodities.

I knew the pain of hunger when I was a child. I begged her again to eat something.

She said that she can only have lemon water.

I cancelled the tasty Hyderabad chicken biryani to give support to whatever myfiance's wish was. I ordered one by two lemon water.

She gave a weird expression which implied romance is not good when one ishungry and she told me to order 2 glasses for her.

Finally, we had 2.5 glasses each and .5 glass came under romance category.

She asked what is the plan for evening?

I said I am looking for 2nd wife She said ha ha with agape and patted on my head with bill folder.

23

Next day, Hasini called me and said her father was asking for my convenient dates?I asked is it for our first night?

Shut up! you are on speaker and father is with me. she said.

I stopped laughing and said as early as possible. Then she said there is one in 10days from then.

I asked her to put me off on loud speaker and then I gave kiss to my mobile.

Then I realized that I should wash my mobile with RIN surf. It was so dirty.

Hari, my marriage date got fixed.

Great news Balu. I am very happy for you." hari said.

Hari warned me that "Whenever you come across any girl that you had met lastweek, don't express your dislike and just maintain friendship with them. Soon theywill understand. I will pass your marriage invitation to them."

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I said fine.

I have to inform my colleagues and invite them for my marriage.I have to distribute cards to my well wishers, shopping, and lot more to do.

I asked hari This is my first marriage :) You have to guide me.

Hari smiled and said "Sure dude. This is my brother's marriage. You will see how Icelebrate"

On that day, we planned to go to Krishna Kanth park, which was famous place forlove birds in hyderabad.

I went to her home to pick up Hasini.

I didnt know how to drive her scooty and it is not good to make a girl to ride.

Called an auto.Auto wala said 200rs to go to park, which was just 2km far.

Auto drivers take the advantage specially when you are with with girl friend.I was lucky because he didnt ask all my properties.

I started calculating how much money it costs.Hasini waved her hand to stop my calculation and she said 50.Auto wala said 100. And finally agreed upon 70.

24After some useless conversation, Hasini concluded that I was not romantic.I challenged her by saying famous telugu dialogue "I will make you fall in love withme before our marriage."

I dropped her at home and was thinking deeply How should I make Hasini fall inlove for me

It would be lifelong shame if I couldnts make it.

A cute little girl is walking on the other side of road with 5-kg of books on her back.

In my childhood days, we used to carry 2-3 small books till 5th class. But today,2nd class pupil carry around 15-20 books.

I said hi to kid. She also said hi with a smile.

I asked her which grade are you in?

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She said that she was bored of answering that question.Then I asked which hero you like the most.

She said prabhas with broad smile. He was telugu crazy hero, heart throb for manygirls in Andhra Pradesh.

To continue my non-technical conversation, I took photo with my smartphone andshowed it her.

She was impressed with my photography skills and asked me to show games on it.I was using nexus-s, which was the latest model then.

It is always my pleasure to play with kids, and also conversing with highlyexperienced people.

Kid became very good friend of mine in no time.It made me to scrutinize more about my current research problem LOVE.When I could impress a small girl in no time, why not Hasini.

I reached home. Hari opened door for me.

Hari asked with a smile, How are the meetings going on?

Today, one interesting thing happened. I challenged hasini that I will make her tofall in love with me before marriage.

Hari said This is romantic. But how can you?

why not. You dont know anything apart from typing keyboard and scribing on paper. haripiqued my angry.

To support my intellectuality, I got first in creativity contest. I can easily impressher.

Hari said Thats wrong. You want her to love you. Then, why are you trying toimpress her?

I argued that both were same.

To impress, you have do something she likes. But in love, whatever you do, sheshould like you hari said and opened my eyes.

Then, I realized what youth was trying to do.

To impress girls, they spend lot of money. But impression doesnt get their loveslove.

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I thought I need practical experience on how couple interact each otherromantically.

25

I went to a park on next day morning to observe couples. There were so manycouples. Lot many singles like me also came there for jog.

I brought a news paper to pretend that I was reading.

One romantic couple sat under tree.

I knew, it was impropriety to eavesdrop personal talk. Though, I tried it wasdifficult to listen to their conversation.

Someone patted my back. I turned briskly and shouted what?

That was hasini.

She asked what are you doing? I showed the paper and said I am reading paper. 'No, where were you peeping at.' she questioned

Hasini looked at the jogging track.

By looking at her father, she said 'my father is coming, be nice.'

I said Hi to her father.

I felt like greeting my old drill teacher.

He came in white colored marathon t-shirt, tracks with white and black stripes.

I joined their jog.

Why there is a guard with a beautiful girl always?

Jogging might be one of the reason for hasinis slenderness.

26

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I went to the Hyd-airport to receive Pull.

We took a cab. I told him the challenge I made to Hasini.

He promised me that he would give practical training on how to be romantic.

Immediately, he told the driver to stop the cab.

Pull, we almost reached the home.

Just five more minutes.He showed me two young girls, who were walking in the corner of road. He saidthat he want to teach me how to be romantic.

Lesson 1: Be adventurous in whatever thing you do for girl.

Pull instructed the driver to drive slowly till those girls and push the acceleratorright after crossing them.

Before driver raises speed, pull kissed the girl on her cheek.

Girls started shouting.

I was shocked and looked out to say sorry to them.

She was Hasinis friend, siri. I immediately sat back and scolded pull for hismischievous act.

He didnt listen to my words.

He was very happy that he kissed a girl for the first time.

My phone rung.

Yes, It was Hasini. I didnt answer her call.

Hasini and her friend came to Haris house.

I rented two apartments for all my colleagues and dropped Pull there.So, I didnt go to Hari house.

Even police couldn't have searched for terrorist, virappan, as much as Hasini wassearching for my friend, pull.

She sent me message and asked me to bring pull to birthday function of herrelative.

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Instead of telling truth to Pull, I asked him that 'should we go for birthday functionin the evening?'

He asked was it a girls birthday?

I said it was a birthday of close friends son. He replied 'No'.

I tried to convince him a lot. He agreed to come if I can get some information aboutsiri.

27

We reached the party venue.

I instructed Pull to stop his practical sessions. So that I would still be a gentleman.

Lesson2: When your girl friend comes to know your mistake, cook up withsomething related to her likes.

As soon as he finished his statement, he went to Hasinis friend and hugged hertightly.

I opened my mouth for his courageous act.

She immediately pushed him and tried to slap with 120km/hour. Pull kneeled downto escape her slap.

He took out white rose flower, and said

I am very sorry for my outrageous acts.All I did this to express my love.

I know everything about you.Will you marry me?

She got puzzled and asked How do you know me? How do you know that I likewhite rose flowers?

I lived nearby your house. I couldnt tell you my feelings before because I was veryshy guy.

She thanked for the rose and said she needed time to think.

Hey... why didnt you tell me I asked pull.

Lesson3: Tell lies to escape from life and death situations.

It was too much to my mind.

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I asked pull What will you do if she comes and say yes.

Pull said casually, Then, I will introduce a dummy wife

For gods sake please keep me away from these situations.

Pull, tomorrow is strike in A.P. Private buses wont run. So, You have to go to yourhome town today.

why so hurry. Let me teach few more lessons. said pull.

It is already 8:15 PM.

Auto... Auto...

Pull, you go now. Otherwise, I will end up in prision.

Pull eyes are searching for Hasini friend while I am dragging him out.

I pushed pull into auto and said dont forget bring your parents to marriage.

28

Next day, Hasini, her mother and I went to another Saree shopping for my

marriage.Ramya also came there. I said Hi to her and gave smile to her parents. Herparents returned me a look as I did something naughty.

Hasini has choosen green color saree. It was sprinkled with stone studded floralmotifs. Scallop border made with embellished with stone, zardosi work, which madethe saree look splendid.

Hasini and Ramya went to trail room.

When I was waiting at the trail room door, Ramya came out and asked me how shewas on a dress.

I said its nice.

Hasini came out and asked me what were you doing?. Did you come with me orany other girl?

I said I had no idea, why she asked me instead of her mother.

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What? She came with her mother. That means you know her? Hasini stunned.

Yeah, she is Ramya.

She is one of the girls that I met in last week.

Hasini raised her eyebrows and asked You met only Sunitha and Lahari. When didyou meet Ramya?

I said after you.

She was surprised and said What the hell?

Hasini mother was walking towards us.

I held Hasini hand and said Hasini, Your mom is coming. I will explain everythinglater.

I said Aunty, I have some work to do. You carry on.

I briskly came out of the mall. I couldnt feel the heat.

29 Last night, I didnt sleep properly. Because Hasini couldn't wait till tomorrowmorning.

On the other day, we met at Joy Alukkas jewellery shop to buy platinum rings.

Mahesh babu, telugu Actor, is a brand ambassador for this jewellary shop.

We bought two rings. I paid bill and came out.

When we are waiting for a hired cab, sunitha and her parents came out of BMW.

Sunitha came to me asked what a surprise! do you came here to me?

I said with whispering voice I came to shopping with friend.'

By pointing at Hasini, I introduced her to sunitha.

sunitha smiled at Hasini. Hasini gave a serious look at me.

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sunitha offered can I drop you.

I said no thanks and opened the cab door quickly.

sunitha parents asked her why I am leaving hurriedly.

sunitha said her parents that I might still have fear of travelling with her for a drive.

30

Balu, lets take Hari to party. Because of him, we met each other. Hasini said.

Thats a good idea.

I will ask him now.

Hello hari, this is balu. Where are you?

Your voice is not audible. I am at one of my customers marriage hari said. OK. I changed mode of my vocal chord to loud speaker. Hasini and I owe a treat for you. Where do you want?

Hey, you are louder. everyone is looking at us Hasini said

I dont need any party. You are happy. Thats the big treat for me. said Hari.

Thank you hari. But dont disappoint us. Ok. Lets go to Barista today. I like coffee over there said hari.

Deal. I said and cut the call.

We started to Barista in a rented cab.I got a loose tongue. I said to Hasini Ramya also likes coffee at Barista

Hmm. said Hasini and turned seriously towards me.

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To change the mood of a angry goddess face, I said which car should we buy inUS?

She said with a stern voice as long as you and I only travel, I am fine with any car

We reached Barista.

Let me open door for you I said.

When do you become chivalrous? asked Hasini.

I smiled and came out of the car and tried to open door for Hasini. Ramya flashedin front of me and dragged my hand towards Hari.

This is sufficient for me to get another sleepless night class from Hasini.

Hey Ramya, How are you?

Hasini came out and looked at Ramya as if she is going to kill her in next minute.

I said Ramya, she is my

Hari interrupted and said she is Hasini, my friend.

Hari dominated the whole conversation.

You know Ramya, coffee is a symbol of sharing love. said hari.

Ramya held my hand and said Thats true. I gave a ugly smile and asked the meaning of Ramyas behavior to hari with headmovements.

Hari returned with his gestures that he wanted me to keep silent.

Ramyas acts are making Hasini crazy.

This happens when you are so possessive about someone.

I tried to take out Ramyas hand. She held more tightly.

Hari said we have a few days for marriage. Good days are ahead for everyone

All of us said yes.

Ramya asked me should we go for shopping?

Hari said we have some work to do. some other time, please.

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ok. I will call you dear said Ramya and left.

Hasini gave a smile by twisting lips to show a diplomatic expression.

As soon as Ramya left, Hasini raised from her seat and went into the cab seriously.

I asked hari why does Ramya here?

I dont know. Hmm. She comes here regularly.

I often see her here. said hari.

Why did she held my hand?

Hari said What I can say about it? I told about your past and future plans.

She must be showing brotherly love on you. You must not mistake her.

If she knows, then it is fine. Thanks for coming Hari. See you later.

I should cool down Hasini

Hasini, dont worry about Ramya. Hari said about our marriage plan.

Because I am an orphan, she must be showing brotherly love. I said.

She almost convinced.

Ok. But her manners doesnt justify what you say. said Hasini.

I raised my voice and said dont spoil our time Hasini.

It is time to be happy.

31

I went to Hasinis home. That day was her birthday. I specially designed saree for

Hasini and gifted it. Hasini, we will go for a party tonight. Be ready at 7P.M. I will pick you up.

I reached Hasinis home by 6:30PM. Hasini wore the designed saree. I opened a cardoor for her.

She asked where are we going?

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I said we are going to Taj Krishna.

I directed her to banquet hall told her to open the door.

She was very surprized. Her favorite actor, Mahesh Babu, is there with his wife.I won a lucky draw in joy allukas jewellery and got an offer to dine with Mahesh.

Decoration of hall, music and dishes everything was arranged as per Hasini's likes.

Server brought drinks for us. I cut my finger intentionally. Blood got sprinkled ontable. Immediately, Hasini hold my finger with her sarees corner. She startedcrying.

I hold her head, placed on my chest to console her.

After that, I take out ring from a pocket and said'Hasini, you are with special people that you are always interested to meet. Yourfavorite music is playing on. whole hall was ornated as per your likes.

You are my first relation in this world. Only indication of true love is, few dropletsfrom eyes. I carved for that love for all these years.Thank you very much for expressing your love.

And then, I kneeled down and asked Will you marry me Hasini?

She gave a kiss on my forehead and I put a ring on her finger.

Every body in room clapped including Mahesh.Maheshs wife took out a small gift and gave Hasini and said birthday wishes.

We were there till 12 PM. We talked about movies, personal life.

That night was a first topic for Hasini whenever she meets any new person.

I am the luckiest guy.Despite many misunderstandings, she loves me a lot.

32

I said 'Hari, You know what? Hasini expressed her love.'

Hari said Nice Balu. You proved that you are not just geek but also a good lover.Two more days to go...

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He asked do you know what you have to do after marriage?want to see some videos?

I gave a facial expression between shyness and maturity.

Thank you hari. You think like a real brother.

Before designing every device, we write a embedded program on it. In a similarfashion, god designed such that each organ knows what to do.

We dont need to teach heart about its functionality. When time comes, that thingyalso acts I said and gave a matured smile.

Hari said Cool. you are all set for marriage.

'By the way, Hari why do you arrange only NRI marriages, but not local?

Hari said 'Now youth is crazy about love. They are eloping with their lovers on theday of marriage. It became a vogue. Because of love, I am loosing my brokerage.

wherever there is a distance, there is less bond, less love.'

'Good Logic. Keep it up hari'

Marriage day

33

The day has come. my marriage day.

I groomed myself with the help of beautician in one of the rented apartment.

Hey balu, innova has arrived. lets start for marriage. Pull said.

4 four more hours to the auspicious moment. Should we start now? I said.

there will be many pre-marriage ceremonies. Infact we are late. Said Pull.

Let me give a call to Hari I said.

Message said Please type 1 to send voice mail...

Time God. Where is hari. I said.

Pull said lets start now. Hari will come to marriage.

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In general bride family book hall and serve food for all guests.

Since this is my first function in my life, I decided to take care of all marriagearrangements. We reached the marriage hall.

Venue is sparsely filled with guests and can accommodate 2k guests easily.

I hardly get guests for my marriage as only bride side relatives are there to come.

I went straight to my waiting room.

My colleagues came and visited me in a room.

Hi all how is your journey?

rakesh said Yeah. We enjoyed a lot.

metal scanning machine didnt allow boss to cross. Guard scanned with metaldetector from neck to toe four times. he didnt find any metal item.

Guard floundered. He called his officer. Boss has metal teeth which made themachine to cry.

Another funny thing was that head & shoulders held a contest about dandruff.Winner is chosen if he/she doesnt have dandruff. Our boss removed his wig andparticipated.

Whole room filled with laughing sounds.

Echoes made them lot more effective

my boss also joined laughter. He became so friendly. employees started making jokes in front of him.

Hasinis friends came inside and started proposing me.

I said should I buy few more yellow colored threads to knot? I can marry all of you.

Everyone laughed and left room. Priest called me to podium. He uttered and made me to pronounce mantras insankrit.

th of hall was filled with guests. I was shocked.

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Hey pull, I didnt invite these many people. Who are they?

Pull said calm down baby. this is first time for you. Hasini might have manyrelatives.

Food supplier came and asked sir, till now we served 750 people. Still people arecoming. There are no grains. We cant cook now.

I waved my hand to pull to deal with it.

He said It is not good to send guests without serving. at least serve them sometiffin.

Later, I called pull and said call hari. Since yesterday, I didnt see him

Hey pull hasini friend shouted.

She kissed him on cheek in front of pulls father.

what are you doing? pulls father shouted at siri.

what is your problem? He is my boy friend. who are you? said siri.

He said I am his father and slapped him on his back of head. who is she? Ooh. Hasinis friend touched pulls father legs and said bye

What are you doing pullaya? father shouted at pull.

pull father said I told you so many times. Dont talk to girls. Aah. Common father. she is teasing said pull.

Hasini arrived to podium. guests were whispering each other. Their noise is morethan marriage music. Guests were looked at us as if they came to wrong marriagehall.

Some one shouted loudly from the corner of marriage hall... stop the marriage.

what. There is no villian in my story.

he is sunithas father. He is stout and came in suit. Good thing is that sunithadidnt get his stout personality

Pulls father takes opposition and asked why?

Because, my daughter has to get married to balu.

All the guests were raised from their seats as if movie was over.

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Hasinis father is scolding her mother.I told you naa... he is play boy.Her mother pressed his hand tightly to stop him from saying more words.

Pulls father said Stop your nuisance.I dont know who are you.balu liked Hasini.Both families agreed for this marriage and shown my marriage card which hasHasini and my photo.

sunithas father opened his marriage card and shown the card which has sunithaand my photo.

Pulls father was stumbled.

I took the turn. Sir, you might have mis-guided.

I havent liked your girl. I told her too. Then how come, you made arrangementsfor marriage?

What the nonsense.? said Sunithas father.

Her father looked around, called hari loudly Hari, Hari...

Where is hari, your brother? Sunitha questioned me.

what is happening here? why people are gathered here? Ramyas parents said.

Ramya also came in bride dress.

Sunithas father said with anger Big drama is happening

Sunithas father opened his i-phone and started calling Hari.

Ramyas father said it is time for marriage.

balu, sit there. Ramya is here.

Ramyas father words made sunithas father more anger. Arey idiot, there are three brides here. said sunithas father.

Ramyas mother fell on the floor.

Mom, get up... ramya said with weeping voice. relatives took her to brides room.

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Sunithas father pointed at me and said I am a cheater.

Damn it. Hari is not answering his phone and pressed end call button hardly.

I sat on podium and got puzzled a moment.

I said Listen guys, Hari is not my brother.

What... sunithas father shouted and hold his heart.

Sunitha said Cool down dad. Your B.P is raising. and made him to sit on chair.

Sunithas father started weeping I gave 2 crores in cash to that f***er

I gave 1 crore said ramyas father.

What!!! I dont encourage dowries

Oh man. Hari took money and absconded.

Now I understood. He told me not to convey my disinterest to sunitha, ramya . Hemade arrangements to meet ramya at Barista and sunitha at jewerally shop.

Hasini asked You also met Lahari. Where is she?

I took sunithas fathers i-phone pressed few numbers.

Hasini said you remembered her number?

Oh, common. Her number is 10 7s. I said.

Her father answered. Aunty, this is balu. Where is Lahari?

She went to USA today morning. why didnt you come to her marriage.

Sorry Aunty. I was busy and cut the call.

Sunithas father hold my shirt and said I dont know where is hari. You have tomarry my daughter.

Ramyas father pushed sunithas father. This boy has to marry my daughter.

They started quarrelling each other. Pull handed me knotting thread. I tied to Hasiniwithout any thought.

Sunithas father turned towards me and said You son of **** and coming towardsme.

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Sunitha shouted Dad... stop it.

Everyone became silent.

He didnt like me. How can I marry him? said sunitha.

I apologized for whatever happened.

We dont need apology. Give me my money said ramyas father.

Pulls father raised his hand said dont you change. dont you know giving dowry isillegal.

I am a parent of girl. I dont have enough courage to think like you. ramyas fathersaid with weeping voice.

Those are savings of my job. Now How can I bring a bridegroom to my daughter. said ramyas father.

Ramya said papa, dont worry about me.

Pulls father cleared everybody from there. siri and pull touched his father.

Pulls father hold them and I want you to be happy my dear son.I might have taken too much care because I thought you are still child.

Pull hugged his father and said I am very lucky.

Hasinis father hold my hand and said Sorry for misunderstanding you.Now onwards, you are like my son.

My boss came and handed a cheque and promotion letter. I said thanks.I went to Ramyas father and handed that cheque him and wished him to find goodmatch for Ramya.

34

Hasinis mother is crying since we started from Hasinis house to airport.

I asked pull When are you coming?

After my marriage said pull.

Congrats. I said.

Hasini and I waved bye to everyone at the airport.

45


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After 22 hours of long journey, We landed at the Newyork airport.

Hari and lahari are standing at terminal

what the hell?

Why did you swindle them? I said and pushed Hari back.

Listen dude... Listen' said hari.

Police came towards us. Hari told police sorry and he left.

Hasini held my hand to control my anger.

Hari said 'I didnt use their money. I donated that money to orphanages.

You are living happy life in USA... Now, you got a nice wife. what about yourbrothers Balu?

I hugged Hari and said 'I am sorry for misunderstanding you.

* END *

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Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events andincidents are either the products of the authors imagination or used in a fictitious manner.Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.
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Indian Bridegroom