Hot Spot Issue #311

8/8/2019 Hot Spot Issue #311

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LOUNGES & CLUBS

Mr. Wonderfuls icIsland Breeze 09Frozen Paradise icNetties Lounge 13Inferno Lounge 05Raymonds Players Club 12Mutuals 03Rosettes 21

TRANSPORTATION

Bobby Albright 30AutoSource - Michelle West 06AutoSource - Sonia Scott 10SutoSource - Gina Smith 38JJs Tire World 29J&H Car Care Center 26JJ & Ys 29

ENTERTAINMENTDr. I.M. Smartt Lottery 33HOT SPOT Maze 40SUDOKU 40SUDOKU Solution 43DJ Dirty Redd 37DJ Postman 30Trevon Stand 36

SERVICESMind of Creations 33Restore Your Photos 14HOT SPOT Printing2011 Calendars 39Ellington Bartending 42Small Time Movers 42DeVillars Law Care 16

CLOTHING & FASHION

HOT SPOT Stuff 36St Paul Clothing 37Respect for Life 31

EVENTSMartha Romeos Birthday 16

RETAILShawn Loury Washer Dryers 42Respect for Life 31Bills Mini Mart 26Dean Forest Beverage 26

FOOD & DININGPats Catering 30Good 4 Real 42Get Real Catering 2 42

HEALTH & BEAUTYMedicaid Advantage 04AVON 42

LEGAL & FINANCIALMAX$ TAXS 37Medicare Upgrade 31A Brighter Day Bail Bond 08CRIMESTOPPERS 07Smoking Ordnance 27

TECHNOLOGYRestore Your Photos 41HOT SPOT Online 15

AROUND TOWNAround TownAround TownAround Town ExtraAround Town ExtraMore Around TownMore Around Town

FEATURESHOT SPOT Reps 14HOT SPOT Subscribe 33One Mans Opinion 02HOT SPOT Schedule 05HOT SPOT Rates 32LaughsBeach High Yearbooks 17Artwirk YOU 18


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One Mans Opinion

Part IYou knew it was coming so lets talk about the citys new No SmokingOrdnance. Allow me to be clear and go on the record. I DO NOT LIKEIT, but I will obey it. Heres why I dont like it. I think its too encom-

passing. If Im outside at a stadium, 50 feet from everyone else, I cantsmoke. If Im in a city park. I guess thats what they call a city ownedfacility, I cant smoke. If I open a Private Club, I cant smoke. But ifmy club is Private, do I have to let the inspectors or police in to see ifIm smoking. If the members of the club are all 6 feet or taller, 55 and older, plays chess and tiddlywinks and smokes Salem, why are we not allowed to smoke in our Private Club? Suppose I was theONLY Member of my Secret Underground Private Club? Do I have to tell the city so they can keep mefrom smoking. If I tell them, them it wouldnt be Secret, Underground or Private, now would it?

Now heres what I see happening in the other clubs and lounges as it pertains to us smokers. Wearent drinking OR smoking as much while were out. Since we cant smoke and drink at the same time,

we drink awhile, stop cover our drinks when the urge to smoke hits, go outside, smoke and THENcome back in to drink. Normally during the same period of time we would have drank and smokedtwice as much. Bad for the bar owner, hes making less money, Bad for the convenience store owner,hes selling less cigarettes, Bad for the government, less cigarette and liquor tax revenue, Bad for thedrinker/smoker because were not enjoying the experience nearly as much. Sure were spending less,but were also enjoying it less.

Smoker/Drinkers will, start going to clubs outside of the city limits (less tax revenue for the city).Smoker/Drinkers will sneak into the restroom for a quick smoke especially when its cold or raining.Smoker/Drinkers will stay home and/or host their own parties, thus hurting bar and lounge business.

I dont like the ordnance, but I will obey it. Ill be spending less time in the clubs and lounges, spendingless money and enjoying it less until I stop smoking. And yes, I intend to stop, The ordnance has noth-ing to do with it, Its just another governmental annoyance, perpetrated by the do-gooders and PC cul-ture we live in today.

In the immortal words of Merle Travis and Tex Williams:

Smoke, smoke, smoke that cigarettePuff, puff, puff and if you smoke your self to deathTell Saint Peter at the Golden GateThat you hate to make him waitBut you gotta have another cigarette

Just, One Mans Opinion.Live Long and Prosper

Ronald A. Gilliard, Publisher

Thanks Savannah, for 12 Years of the HOT SPOT!


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LaughsIt was election time and a politician decided to go out to the

local reservation and try to get the Native American vote. They

were all assembled in the Council Hall to hear the speech. Thepolitician had worked up to his finale, and the crowd was get-

ting more and more excited. "I promise better education oppor-

tunities for Native Americans!"

The crowd went wild, shouting "Hoya! Hoya!"

The politician was a bit puzzled by the native word, but was

encouraged by their enthusiasm. "I promise gambling reforms

to allow a Casino on the Reservation!"

"Hoya! Hoya!" cried the crowd, stomping their feet.

"I promise more social reforms and job opportunities for Na-

tive Americans!"

The crowd reached a frenzied pitch shouting, "Hoya! Hoya!

Hoya!"

After the speech, the Politician was touring the reservation, and

saw a tremendous herd of cattle. Since he was raised on a

ranch, and knew a bit about cattle, he asked the Chief if he

could get closer to take a look at the cattle.

"Sure," the Chief said, "but be careful not to step in the hoya."


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JORIEFWILLIAMS JULIOCESARNAVA DEMETRIA JACKSON RUSSELFERGUSON

RUSSELL E. GILBERT DIASHONGUYTON RAYLINDACARRIERWEBB SANDRAGARSIA

BRIANLAMARFAGINS DAVIDL.LAMBERT ELIJAHHAYES CATARINACASEIROVIEIRA

STACEYMORMAN JACKALLEN ANTONIOCRAWFORD KEITHMARROW


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Laughs

An acquaintance of mine who is a physician told this

story about her then-four-year-old daughter. On the

way to preschool, the doctor had left her stethoscopeon the car seat, and her little girl picked it up and

began playing with it.

"Be still, my heart," thought my friend, "my daugh-

ter wants to follow in my footsteps!" Then the childspoke into the instrument: "Welcome to McDon-

ald's. May I take you order?"

Tips with English Grammer

1. Don't abbrev.

2. Check to see if you any words out.

3. Be carefully to use adjectives and adverbs correct.4. About sentence fragments.

5. When dangling, don't use participles.6. Don't use no double negatives.

7. Each pronoun agrees with their antecedent.

8. Just between You and i, case is important.9. Join clauses good, like a conjunction should.

10. Don't use commas, that aren't necessary.

11. Its important to use apostrophe's right.12. It's better not to unnecessarily split an infinitive.

13. Never leave a transitive verb just lay there with-

out an object.14. Only Proper Nouns should be capitalized. also asentence should.

15. begin with a capital and end with a period

16. Use hyphens in compound-words, not just in anytwo-word phrase.

17. In letters compositions reports and things like

that we use commas18. to keep a string of items apart.

19. Watch out for irregular verbs which have

creeped into our language.

20. Verbs has to agree with their subjects.21. Avoid unnecessary redundancy.

22. A writer mustn't shift your point of view.

23. Don't write a run-on sentence you've got topunctuate it.

24. A preposition isn't a good thing to end a sentence

with.25. Avoid cliches like the plague.

Laughs

The politician was sitting at his campaign headquar-

ters when the phone rang. He listened intently, and

after a moment his face brightened. When he hung up,

he immediately phoned his mother to tell her the good

news.

"Ma," he shouted, "the results are in. I won the elec-

tion!"

"Honestly?"

The politician's smiled faded. "Aw, heck, Ma, why

bring that up at a time like this?"

A certain little girl, when asked her name, would

reply, "I'm Mr. Sugarbrown's daughter."

Her mother told her this was wrong, she must say,

"I'm Jane Sugarbrown."

The Vicar spoke to her in Sunday School and said,

"Aren't you Mr. Sugarbrown's daughter?"

She replied, "I thought I was, but mother says I'm

not."

There once was a 94 year old nun back in the1890s whose worn out body began to surren-

der. Her doctor prescribed for her a shot of

whiskey three times a day, to relax her. How-

ever, not to be lured into worldly pleasures,

she huffily declined.

But her mother superior knew the elderly sis-

ter loved milk. So she instructed the kitchen to

spike the milk three times a day. Eventually,the elderly pious one approached her final

hour. As several sisters gathered around her at

bedside, the mother superior asked if she

wanted to leave them any words of wisdom.

"Oh, yes," she replied. "Never sell that cow!"


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For Advertising in theHOT SPOT Contact:

Gary (843) 226-8829

Check Out Our Website: TheHotSpotMagazine.com

For Advertising in the

HOT SPOT Contact:

Denny (912) 428-3701

Laughs

A psychology student was to help a profes-

sor in conducting a personality test. Theroom was set up with various props in or-

der to move through the assessment

quickly. The first person to enter the room

started through the test.

"How does this glass of water look to

you?" Person 1: It is half empty. Student

writes 'pessimist' in his report.

Person 2 enters the room. "How does this

glass of water look to you?" Person 2: It is

half full. Student writes 'optimist' in his

report.

Person 3 enters the room. "How does this

glass of water look to you?" Person 3:

Looks like you have twice as much glass

as you need there.

The student looks totally blank and goes to

consult with the professor.

"Oh them!", the professor says, "I forgot to

warn you about the engineers! They have

no personality."


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HOT SPOT?Now You Dont Have To.

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Following Web Sites

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On the HOT SPOT Channel

Keep in Touch and Find Out Whats

Going On in the Clubs and at Events,

As It Happens.


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MORE AROUND TOWN


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MORE AROUND TOWN


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MORE AROUND TOWN


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MORE AROUND TOWN


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Laughs

Some tips on better camping:

-- When using a public campground, a tuba placed on

your picnic table will keep the campsites on eitherside vacant.

-- Get even with a bear who raided your food bag bykicking his favorite stump apart and eating all the

ants.

-- Old socks can be made into high fiber beef jerky

by smoking them over an open fire.

-- When smoking a fish, never inhale.

-- A hot rock placed in your sleeping bag will keep

your feet warm. A hot enchilada works almost aswell, but the cheese sticks between your toes.

-- While the Swiss Army Knife has been popular foryears, the Swiss Navy Knife has remained largely

unheralded. Its single blade functions as a tiny canoe

paddle.

-- Lint from your navel makes a handy fire starter.Warning: Remove lint from navel before applying the

match.

-- You can compress the diameter of your rolled up

sleeping bag by running over it with your car.

The fur began to fly when my fellow air-

plane passengers learned there was a chance

they might miss their connecting flights out

of Aspen.

When we finally landed, I found out just

how nasty things got. Over the intercom, a

harried flight attendant announced, "Those

of you continuing on to L.A. please wait out-

side next to the boarding ramp and we will

have a shuttle run you over."

Laughs

A woman was walking along the beach when

she stumbled upon a bottle. She picked it up

and rubbed it, and lo-and-behold 'a genie' ap-

peared! The amazed woman asked if she got

three wishes.

The genie said, "Nope, sorry, three-wish ge-

nies are a storybook myth. I'm a one-wish ge-

nie. So... what'll it be?"

The woman did not hesitate. She said, "I want

peace in the Middle East. See this map? I

want these countries to stop fighting with

each other and I want all the Arabs to love the

Jews and Americans and vice-versa. It willbring about world peace and harmony."

The genie looked at the map and exclaimed,

"Lady, be reasonable. These countries have

been at war for thousands of years. I'm out of

shape after being in a bottle for five hundred

years. I'm good but not THAT good! I don't

think it can be done. Make another wish and

please be reasonable."

The woman thought for a minute and said,

"Well, I've never been able to find the right

man. You know, one that's considerate and

fun, likes to cook and help with the house

cleaning, gets along with my family, doesn't

watch sports all the time and is faithful. That's

what I wish for... a good man."

The genie let out a sigh and said, "Let me seethat map again..."


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Phone: (912) 920-8875

Cell: (912) 228-1815

Fax: (866) 416-0074

Email: [email protected]


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Our publication schedule is the 2nd and 4th Wednesdays

of every month. The deadline for inclusion is the Fridaybefore the 2nd & 4th Wed. Our advertising rates are below.

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Web Site: TheHotSpotMagazine.com

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Times are Tight. Your Advertising Budget is Being Squeezed. You Know You

Must Advertise to Succeed. Make the Most of Your Advertising Dollars.

Advertise in the HOT SPOTThe Leader in Affordable Advertising

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Phone: 912-484-1143

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Being in Business and not Advertising is like Blinking your Eyes in a Dark Room.

You know what Youre doing, but Nobody else does.


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December 22: White Christmas!!! 13" more of the

white stuff & its so cold, it won't melt 'til August. Tried

to shovel - just too tired. Tried to get help from

neighbor who has snow plow on his truck but he said he

was too busy. (Sure he's lying.)

December 23: Only 2" of snow today and had warmed

up to 0. Wife wanted me to decorate the front of the

house. What is she nuts!!! Why didn't she tell me to dothat a month ago? Says she did. (Think she's lying.)

December 24: 6". Snow packed so hard by snowplow, I

broke the shovel. I'm gonna get that snow plow driver.

(I know he waits around the corner to see if I'm fin-

ished, then roars by at a 100, sending snow flying all

over.) Wife wanted me to sing carols with her & open

our presents, but I was busy watching for the darn snow

plow.

December 25: Merry Christmas. Another 20" of the

slop. Snowed in again & the idea of shoveling makes

my blood boil. I hate snow! Then the snowplow driver

came by asking for a donation. I wanted to hit him over

the head with my shovel. Wife says I have a bad atti-

tude. I think she's an idiot and if I have to watch "It's a

Wonderful Life" one more time, I'll throw her in the

snowbank.

December 26: Still snowed in.

December 27: Temperature dropped another 30 degrees

and the pipes froze.

December 28: Warmed up to -25. Still snowed in and

the wife is making me crazy!!!!!!

December 29: Another 10" & neighbor says I have to

shovel the roof before it caves in. That's the silliest

thing I ever heard. How dumb does he think I am?

December 30: Roof caved in. Another 9" in forecast.

December 31: Set fire to what's left of the house: no

more shoveling.

January 8: I feel sooooo good. I just love those little

white pills they keep giving me. Why am I tied to the

bed?

Laughs

A diary of one person's love of snow...

December 8: 6:00 PM. It started to snow. The first

snow of the season: we took out cocktails and sat for

hours by the window, watching the huge soft flakes

drift down. It looked like a Grandma Moses Print: so

romantic, we felt like newlyweds again. I love snow!

December 9: Woke to a blanket of crystal white snow

covering the landscape. What a fantastic sight! Moving

here was the best idea I've ever had. Shoveled for the

1st time in years & felt like a boy again. Did the both

driveway and sidewalks. Later, the snowplow came

along & I got to shovel again. What a perfect life.

December 12: Sun melted all the lovely snow but good

neighbour said we'd have a white Christmas. Then com-

mented that by the end on Winter, I'd never want to seesnow again.

December 14: Snow, Lovely snow! 8" last night and

cold, too. Wind took my breath away but warmed up

shoveling. This is the life! Later the snowplow came

back, again, but I'm getting in better shape. Just wish I

didn't huff & puff so much.

December 15: 20 inches forecast. Sold the van and

bought a 4x4; snow tires for the wife's car & 2 extra.

Shoveled, then stocked the freezer. Wife wants a wood

stove in case power goes off. I think that's silly - wearen't in Alaska...

December 16: Ice storm this morning. Landed on my

butt trying to salt the driveway. Hurt real bad. Wife

laughed for an hour. (I think that was very cruel.)

December 17: Too cold and icy to go anywhere. Power

was off for 5 hours. Piled on blankets to stay warm with

nothing to do but stare at the wife & try not to upset

her. Can't believe I'm freezing to death in my own liv-

ing room. (Won't admit that I should have bought woodstove: hate it when she's right.)

December 20: Power's back on and had another 14" of

the stuff. Shoveled all day. Snowplow came by twice.

Kids too busy playing hockey to help. Hardware store

sold out. Next shipment of snow blowers due in March.

Neighbor says I have to shovel or city will have it done

and bill me. (Think he's lying...)


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Winner of WSOKs 2010 - Best Gospel CD


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SUDOKU

The rules of Sudoku are simple. Enter

digits from 1 to 9 into the

blank spaces. Every row must contain

one of each digit. So must

every column, as must every 3x3

square. Each Sudoku has a

unique solution that can be reached

logically without guessing.

The Solution is at the end of the Book.

No Peeking.

HOT SPOT MAZE


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Sudoku Solution

Laughs

Analogies and Metaphors

These came from the annual "Dark and Stormy Night" com-

petition. Actual analogies and metaphors found in high

school essays:

1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two

sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.

2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking

alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.

3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from ex-

perience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a

solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it

and now goes around the country speaking at high schools

about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of

those boxes with a pinhole in it.

4. She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli and he

was room-temperature Canadian beef.

5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a

dog makes just before it throws up.

6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

7. He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.

8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disinte-

grated because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock,

like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM.

9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the

way a bowling ball wouldn't.

10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty

bag filled with vegetable soup.

11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene

had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in

another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of

7:30.

12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a

sneeze.

13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like mag-gots when you fry them in hot grease.

14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers

raced across the grassy field toward each other like two

freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. travel-

ing at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed

of 35 mph.

15. They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with

picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.

15. They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences

that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.

16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirdswho had also never met.

17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was theEast River.

18. Even in his last years, Grandpappy had a mind like a steel trap, onlyone that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.

19. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

20.. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil,

this plan just might work.

21. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eat-ing for a while.

22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either,but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a landmine or something.

23. The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg

behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.

24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around withpower tools.

25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells,

as if she were a garbage truck backing up.

26. Her eyes were like limpid pools, only they had forgotten to put in

any pH cleanser.

27. She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.


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Hot Spot Issue #311