Here I am My Lord

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eptember 19, 2006

Here I Am, My Lord

y first glimpse of the kabah was veiled by an astounding wave of tears. Perhaps I shouldnt have been surprised. In the days leading up top, Id found myself weeping uncontrollably for no apparent reason, and on the Saudi Airlines plane, I was clandestinely sapping up the

nwanted wetness on my face as I listened to beautifully melodious recitations of the Quran, grateful for the darkness that hid the naked longr my Creator.

Wait until the next day to perform umrah if youre too tired, Id been warned. But upon arrival to Mecca from the airport in Jeddah, I foundyself instantly drawn to the Grand Mosque. Sleep was impossible. An irrepressible urge had been building within from the very moment there idea of umrah had entered my consciousness, and it could not be now ignored. No, I was too close. At 2 a.m., I was entering the Kingbdul Aziz Gate, walking like so many before me along the white marbled path that led to the kabah. When I eventually beheld the intenseeauty of that simple cube-like structure, I found myself disappointed: here I was finally, and human weakness prevented me from seeing thery thing for which I longed. I really could not see the kabah. I blinked furiously, blinked again, and a wobbly black box came into view,

amed perfectly against the dark sky, its majestic simplicity in contrast with the intricate arches of the mosque surrounding it.

awe, I succumbed to tears. All my life I had prayed towards this building, and here it stood before me, looking more breathtaking than I co

ver have imagined. It was surreal. The pictures I had seen, none of it had prepared me for the moment when my own eyes lit upon theagnificence that was the kabah. It is said that ones prayers are answered upon first viewing the kabah, but the incredible surge of emotioevented me from making any sort of coherent plea to my Lord. I simply stood there staring. Here I am, my Lord, I thought, here I am be

ou, and I added, weeping, I need Your Mercy and Compassion right now more than ever.

he first couple of rounds about the kabah were mindless; I am ashamed to admit that my supplications were rather incomprehensible. For twas, in Gods glorious presence, circumambulating the kabah with so many others, all the while observing people of so many different shf colour, hearing numerous tongues chanting aloud in various languages, and yet I felt almost completely alone. I was in conversation with ord and no one else mattered. Still, amidst the feelings of exultation and the amazement of finally being there, I experienced a sense of deeespair. For I stood before God in shame. Clad in pure white, I was imperfect, stained with sins that had been repeated time and again. Somead sought to resist; others for which I hadnt even made the effort; some for which I had sought forgiveness; others for which I hadnt.

nd yet, I found peace in my own solitary circlings of the kabah. I walked slowly, paying little heed to those around me. I was surprised by

cus, the concentration. But there were moments when I watched, detached, as both men and women pressed drunkenly against the kabah

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ghting to kiss the black stone, pushing and shoving for an opportunity to cling to the door, and my heart swelled with grief as I envisioned ay of Judgement and imagined the desperation people would feel as they realized the wrongs they had committed and the many chances thad missed. I prayed for those people as I stared at the frenzied crowds in dismay, hoping they would live out the remainder of their lives wiast some of the fervour with which they worshipped on that day.

nd I wept. Oh, how I wept. I am still not sure why I wept, for the rational part of me had long since fled, cowed by the ferocity and newnesmotions contained for much too long. I knew only that I was crying out to the One who knew of my deepest desires and my secret sorrows.ept too as I sought Gods forgiveness, as I asked for inward and outward peace, as I begged for worldly goods that were so mundane, soperficial, I would have been ashamed to even verbalize them to another being. And there were moments when I remained silent, overwhelod would know, I thought. There was no need for words.

ivately, I had referred to the months before my journey as my own Year of Sadness, replete with more disappointment and pain than I couver have imagined. But I found peace and a sort of serene joy while poring through the pages of the Quran; while pushing myself to spend jnother hour in the Prophets mosque even as my head was bobbing madly in sleepiness; while making dhikr and silently contemplating lifemidst the hordes of people sitting around me; while joining in the congregational prayers led by the white-bearded Hudhaify himself; whileustling to the mosque with the thousands all heeding the beautiful call of the muaddhin; while making wudu in the refreshing coldness ofmzam after circling the kabah at noon; while retracing the very footsteps of the Prophet, from the Cave of Hira where hed received the fivelation to the Qubaa Mosque, which hed built after migrating to Medina; while trudging back and forth between the hills of Safa and M

nd wondering just how Hagar, a simple black woman whose name is now a mere footnote in our history books, had managed to do the same blazing sun and it suddenly struck me just how meaningless so much of my life was, how strange were the things I had surrounded myith in the hopes that they would make me happier, and how truly nothing really mattered but for my relationship with God. No singledividual, no other life pursuit was as worthy of my attention. None of the failures meant as much when I had God. And none of the succesattered either if they were not given meaning through my relationship with my Creator. Clichd though it may seem, I was happiest when Iund myself with God.

uring my farewell tawaaf around the kabah, my companion must have noticed my grief, for she sought to comfort me, suggesting that I we back at the kabah sooner than I might imagine. But I was not merely mournful of the emotional and spiritual high I had experienced durost of my stay there. I wept for my own weakness, for even as I departed I was embarrassed to realize I was still thinking of my own self: h

appy I now was, how much I had gained from that visit spiritually and emotionally and mentally, and even then, I was asking more of God,eking guidance, betterment, forgiveness for myself and for others, when really I should have been thanking God, praising God, glorifying my final moments there. As always, I had taken so much, given so little. How selfish I was, and how Merciful and Forgiving was this God

hom I prayed.

ometime in the process of performing umrah, I came to love God with an intensity Id never felt before. The God-consciousness that grewithin me I cannot really explain it. I prayed to God, and God was watching me and listening to me in a way I couldnt possibly internalizehen I bowed and prostrated within the comfort of my own home. On the last day, my friend observed me praying in the airport and burst inars. When I get home, she exclaimed bitterly, I wont see the kabah when I pray. Ill see my door instead! Ill see my bed! I responready missing the zing of pleasure I experienced as I joined the thousands of pilgrims streaming into the mosque with the sole purpose of

erforming each of the five daily prayers; or the anticipation I felt when a friend and I slipped out of our hotel room in the wee hours and hethe mosque on our own; or the flush of happiness that overcame me as I looked up at dawn to see birds chirping as they too circled the kathe air; or even the vivid awareness of inevitable death I felt when we sealed our congregational prayers with additional funereal prayers fe children who had passed away that day. All that I shall treasure and more. But I return home with little regret, for I can only exult in theessing it was for me to have visited such a holy place.

he true impact of the journey is felt when a Muslim purposefully changes elements of his or her life as a result. During my stay there, I tookme to ponder what it really meant to consider the umrah and hajj life-changing experiences. And I came to understand that the personalizayers I was making were really pleas to myself to change. I was speaking to myself just as much as I was speaking to God. I didnt want Gchange me; I wanted God to give me the willpower, the strength, the resolution to change myself. This umrah was not just about finding

omfort in God. It wasnt even about merely worshipping God. It was a journey offering ample opportunity for self-reflection and self-nderstanding. I could be my old self when I returned, and of course, it would be easiest to slide right back into that role. But I could also chI so desired. I made a resolution then and there that for each of my personal pleadings to God, I would make an equal effort to improve mybecome an individual more pleasing to the God whom I so desperately beseeched.

nd so it was that a simple journey that involved donning the ihraam, circumambulating the kabah, praying behind the station of Abraham alking between the hills of Safa and Marwa before removing some or all of ones hair this journey became so much more to me: a cleansf my sins, an antidote for my pains, and a light that now guides me forward along the path. I am grateful. So grateful that even as I write thiow I find myself in tears. I know not what sort of upliftment the hajj experience might generate, but I pray only that this humble umrah iscepted, and I pray too that I am offered the chance to return to Mecca and Medina once more. In the meantime, may God grant me the stretranslate my newfound love for Him into right speech and action so that this journey of mine might not have been in vain.




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Safiyyah's Life Heartfelt Reflections Saudi Arabia

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0 Responses to Here I Am, My Lord

1. silence the trees wait to be takensaid:September 19th, 2006 at 1:21 am

[] ism of nim but that must wait: i just read safiyyahs beautiful here i am, my Lord post about her umrah experience, and acreative/ wi []

2. dawudsaid:September 19th, 2006 at 12:44 pm

salaam Safiyyah,

mashAllah, your pictures are beautiful and your words are poetic and remind me strongly of my own experiences, especially going ftime of hardship to the sheer joy of feeling welcomed by Allah to His Noble Home aywa, I feel some remorse now at not being

Saudi, as it currently exists, is not a country as much as a family running a business (the derogatory, but still incisive, comment by former Israeli general Moshe Dayan) - sadly, the oppression and mendacity that I witnessed there kept me from wanting to stay in-country, other than to visit the Haramayn - or possibly, to live next to the Prophets Mosque

may Allah bless all muslims with the blessings that you and I have had the joy to experience. One question: were you aware of theRihla2006 group that went this summer, and were you there at the same time as some of those folk? Did you have a chance to visit soof the ulema or blessed people who live in the two blessed cities?

3. Asmaasaid:September 19th, 2006 at 1:58 pm

Safiyyah, may Allah (swt) reward you for this touching post. And may He accept your Umrah.

Sometimes I wonder about the wisdom behind Hajj being Fardh, and then I read stories like this and I know. Its easy to lose track ofpurpose in life when you dont know about the places and the people who came before you and those who sacrificed everything for A(swt).

You do seem different lately, and I hope that this trip is something that has caused you to become a better person. I love you

4. get away to a better place! In all honesty..said:September 19th, 2006 at 3:49 pm

[] m blogging, and yes I am bad.. a very bad student), and subhanAllah I came across Safiyyahs post about her Umrah!!! NoComments []

5. Tasneemsaid:September 19th, 2006 at 6:23 pm

Safiyyah, your post left me in tears. May Allah accept your Ummrah and all your duas!

6. Farazsaid:September 19th, 2006 at 9:28 pm

SubhanAllah, that post brought me right back to the Haramain




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of course, reading it at work was probably not a good idea, since the rest of the day, I was kinda daydreaming about Masjid Nabaw

7. Ruqayyahsaid:September 19th, 2006 at 9:39 pm

Bismillah - Thank you so much for that Safiyyah. It was Beautiful. Although it is very hard for the inept among us to capture such beand inner emotion, you accomplish it effortlessly and for us to read it is like recieving an unexpected gift if not muchmore..alhamdulillah. Thanks for the pictures, the words, and letting us read it.

And.. YOURE BACK!! Makes me so happy May Allah give you tawfiq and peace.love, Ruqayyah

8. Adnan Siddiqisaid:September 20th, 2006 at 2:33 am

Dear Safiyah!

You made me restless after making this touchy posts.Since I myself have performed umrah twice yet so I can understand your feelin[maybe not because you and me are not same].Saying dua at first glimpse yes its a fact but another fact is that one just forgets everytwhen see that black building infront of eyes.Ume Habiba has read a beautiful Hamd Kabay per pari jab pehle nazar,kia cheez tha kabhool bhool gaya.

Visiting Both harams is not all about performing ibadat and Umrah.A person experience so many thnigs over there.Durnig tawaf,dur

namaz,during everything.

I coudnt reach to Aswad Stone but yes i got chance to reach MULTAZIM;another special region where no dua is rejected.I kept weeafter putting my head on Kaaba wall.Really wonderful,really amazing.

Yes I agree with you that once you pray infront of Kabaa then you dont feel so exciting to pray at homes but again its all aboutconcentration.Once can feel same even at home if he so pure in his prayers.

Amazing post and may Allah accepts your Umrah-ameen

9. Dinsaid:September 20th, 2006 at 6:06 am

Mashah Allah.May Allah accept your duas.

How has the visit changed the way you pray? I am sure it has?

( Make dua that ALlah gives me the means to visit it soon, inshahallah)

10. Abu Sinansaid:September 20th, 2006 at 7:53 am

MashaAllah. Thanks for sharing.

11. Sadafsaid:

September 20th, 2006 at 7:13 pm

As salaaamu alaikum Saf,

I love you Saf! May Allah swt accept all your duas inshaAllah.

I hope inshAllah the next time I meet you, you can envelop me in more of these amazing experiences that only Allah swt can give us

MashAllah . Please pray for all of us, that we get an opportunity whenever it is best for us to go to Umrah/ Hajj.

Im truly excited to meet you again soon inshAllah, your expereinces just totally humbled me. SubhanAllah

12. darvishsaid:September 20th, 2006 at 9:23 pm




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Alhamdulillah! What a beautifully written account I also wept for a year after being initiated as a darvish, and weep still at theimmensity of the chance of grace I had been given. A chance only, the rest is up to me, to you, and to all who love and struggle in Hiname.

You might also like an early post on Darvish called Reflections on Hajj, writtten by brother Dara, who lives there still.

http://darvish.wordpress.com/2006/06/09/reflections-on-hajj/

Ya Haqq!

13. Asmaasaid:September 20th, 2006 at 10:33 pm

Hey Saf, a totally unrelated (no, really) comment: your blog draws some veryshall we say strange people.COUGHnoshirkersallowedCOUGH.

14. Adnan Siddiqisaid:September 21st, 2006 at 1:16 am

OT:

All images on this website are copyrighted and cannot be used without the express permission of Safiyyah Ally. All rights reserved.

WellWhy copyrigths and permission ms.saffiyah?Did you take permisison from Managment of Masjidul haram and Masjid NabviThere are clear instructions which i saw on enterance gate of masjidul haram that photography is not allowed near the map of wholmasjid it means photography is not legal anyway then why are you asking for others permission? Just curious.I am not taken any picyour website

15. Shababersaid:September 21st, 2006 at 8:47 am

Assalamu Alaikum wa rahmutulah safThat was beautiful eyes just welled up with tears and it flew me back three weeks to when I also first layed my eyes on the blessedKaaba.. it is a shaking and moving esperience.. I even wondered if I deserved.. just to look at the kaaba.. we all go there for His mercand His forgiveness.. a wonderful opportunity.Nice Blog, speaks on so many issues, gives the other sides, and most importantly, it makes us all think critically.. we need more Mus

blogs!

16. suffering from kabah withdrawal syndromesaid:September 21st, 2006 at 1:45 pm

im crying my eyes out, and its all your fault. i miss the kabah and masjid nabawi, and i miss you.

17. Ayesha Masaid:September 21st, 2006 at 1:49 pm

Bismillahirahmaniraheem.

Assalamualaikum Warahmatullah Taala Wabarakatuh dearest Safiyyah,

Alhamdullilah, I thank Allah for giving you the ability to express so beautifully of what is in your heart and my heart. JazakumAllahuKhairan. In the midst of returning to my daily life, your entry brings me back to 3 weeks (or 4) ago when we were together in Makkaand Madinah, waking up together to go for fajr, sitting together on the plane from Jeddah to New York and chatting and wondering hour lives will change for the better, biithnillah, after the trip.

Please take care and please keep in touch. I pray to Allah that He will make us all strong and have the willpower to change ourselvesHim and Only Him, ameen.

Ayesha MaVancouver, BC

18. Jack (in Montreal)said:




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September 21st, 2006 at 9:05 pm

Hello Safiyyah,

Thank you for teaching me about the beauty of Islam and Mecca. I was very moved when I read your passages, and the photographsI can see better now, how this is a great and holy place known as Mecca is truely blessed by God.

I am sure that God must be quite moved and pleased by the intensity of prayer and worship that rises from Earth to heaven from Mec

I am Catholic and I have similar feelings when I go to pray to God at St. Josephs Oratory, at the top of Mt. Royal in Montreal. In facyour article reminded me that I should go and pray to God sometime soon at the Oratory, as it has been too long.

But of course the Oratory does not have the central place, or vast importance across history in the same way as Mecca. The feelings ospirituality you experienced at Mecca must be overwhelming.

So your religion is very fortunate to have a place that is so central where people can go and instantly be overwhelmed by the greaof God,

- Jack (in Montreal)

19. Mezbasaid:September 24th, 2006 at 11:08 pm

Mashallah those are great thoughts and pictures. Always planned to go on hajj soon, now those thoughts are strengthened.

I thought the sauds didnt allow pilgrims to take pictures? But anyways, thanks for sharing.

20. Safiyyahsaid:September 25th, 2006 at 5:39 pm

Thanks for all your comments. I pray that we are all given the opportunity to make this journey.

In response to Mezba and Adnan, the only photo to which this question applies is the kabah photo, as the other mosque photos weretaken outside. To be honest, I wasnt aware that this was official mosque policy in Mecca. I didnt see any sign indicating that camerare not permitted, or I wouldnt have brought the camera into the mosque. In any case, I was rarely ever checked when I went to themosque in Mecca, since I routinely went at 2 a.m. or well before any of the prayer times, and the officials at the door seemed lax at th

times of day. But it seemed to me that the rules were rather arbitrary. I saw a lady explain to the official at the door that she really neeto eat that sandwich in her bag, and she was let through. I was prevented from entering because, among my many purchases that dayhad a box of packaged mamool that I wasnt even intending to open. Why didnt you go through another door, my friend asked whetold her what had happened. I hadnt thought of it, but if I had, I wouldnt have been pouting in my hotel room because Id missed thcongregational Dhuhr prayer. I have heard though (and noticed too) that it is common practice for women to sit together in large grouand break their fast with food at sunset in the mosque itself. There are many such examples, but suffice to say that it is hard to take thofficials seriously when they are ordering women making tawaaf to cover their faces, or shooing women away from the kabah floor prayer time. Its simple enough to just bypass them and find some other way to do whatever it was one wants to do. I suppose its jusdifferent society, and rules dont seem to mean as much there. But I didnt take any such photos in Medina because it was clear to methere that it was forbidden. I was checked, even frisked, each and every time I entered the Prophets mosque, and I was asked too whI had a camera with me. They even prevented people from entering if their cell phones had cameras on it, so they were searching rathcarefully.

21. yasersaid:September 25th, 2006 at 11:26 pm

i envy you. cant wait till i get to go someday.

22. Farazsaid:September 26th, 2006 at 2:16 am

Personally, I think they should prevent people from carrying their cellphones even if they didnt have cameras. It always saddened mwhen I would see people making tawaf or say chatting away on their cellphone.

I didnt mention it earlier, because so many other people did, but seriously, that post was actually one of the most beautiful things Ivever read in the English language.




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23. Mohammedsaid:September 26th, 2006 at 11:11 am

I agree with the comment above. You could get this published, its that good.

24. Briansaid:September 26th, 2006 at 9:16 pm

No matter what ones faith, this was a beautiful and poignant account of spirituality. I feel inspired.

25. Salysaid:September 28th, 2006 at 10:03 am

Beautiful post. Mashallah,Mashallah, Mashallah. Im crying right now. Thank you so much for such a beautiful post. Sorry, I have nwords to describe how I feel.

26. Emsaid:September 28th, 2006 at 10:35 pm

Ma Sha Allah, Ma Sha Allah. May Allah accept your dua for you to return, Amin!

27. Adnan Siddiqisaid:October 3rd, 2006 at 12:19 am

Saffiyah thanks for explaination. Acha I was never checked by masjid officials in Medinah may be because I never carried any kind bag. Yes people did carry mobile all the time in both harams.

28. SAFspace Gender Relations, Sex and Perversion: The Dark Underside of Saudi Arabiasaid:October 13th, 2006 at 8:45 pm

[] he Dark Underside of Saudi Arabia

Ive written at length about how deeply my umrah trip affected me. I want to switch gears a little bit and write today of the strange [

29. Shariqsaid:November 30th, 2006 at 12:02 pm

Salaam to all. I came across this blog space for the first time yesterday when a friend of mine actually emailed me about the article abGender relations, Sex and Perversion he somehow came across while browsing the net. I then searched the internet to find the sourcthe blog and came across this website. I dont know if posting my opinion is OK to you all or not. However, I felt this urge to make mcommeents about the two articles I read. the above mentioned article and the other titled Here I am, My Lord... I must say thatreading the article about your Umrah moved me a lot and I was almost in tears. Although I have unfortunately not been to Umrah or myself but I have imagined myself standing in front of the magnifying presence of the Kabah numerous times and the very thought obeing there in that sacred space has brought tears in my eyes. Insha Allah, I will be able to make it there soon. Thank you for the grepictures and the wonderful description of your experience in such beautiful words. may Allah accept your prayers and your Umrah amay you have many more trips to the holy cities. While reading the other article about your observations about Saudi mens actions ayour thinking of their considering women as unequal to man, infact thinking about women as inferior to men, I had a mixed feeling. not come as a total surprise to me that those men must have behaved in such ways. And not only in Saudi Arabia, such things are seehappen in many other countries, including the west and in the Indian Subcontinent. I would certainly fall short of saying that all menthe same, but having said that, it raises a question that arent all men the same when it comes to thinking about women?. May be the eMANkind can be categorised into 3 different parts. One, those who actually do what you saw them doing in the holy cities, or evenmore criminal things. The second group, those who think about women as objects of sex but fall short of acting upon those thoughts the third group, those who are pious people who seriously and genuinely refrain from such thinking and resulting actions. While talkto a friend of mine about this, he used a very appropriate term which in urdu is Sharm or Haya- A state of mind that refrains anindividual from taking actions harmful to himself and to the society out of his own conscience. in other words refrains himself fromfalling in the trap of the Sahytan. In other words, refraining himself from doing something unacceptable to Allah and His prophet duethe Fear of Allah or Allahs consciousness in ones heart and mind. the Arabic word could be Taqwa. This ofcourse applies to botmen and women. Going back to the categories, I would say most men fall in the second category. Meaning there is potential to moveto the third or the Pious category or deteriorate to the First category. Unfortunately most men today slip through to the first category are bold enough to carry out actions which they now and the society they live in consider to be OK. This is an argument which everyreading this blog has a right to object. there are ofcoourse many men who Allah choose to enlighten and they reverse the path of theilives and become completely different human beings, which sometimes surprises me. But such is the power of enlightenment which beyond human comprehension. I think if people were not to control their actions, they would do it even if the woman was fully cove

from head to toe.




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In continuation of the above comments I also wanted to add before I pressed Enter by mistake, that Religion, especially Islam, couused as an access to learn modesty and controlled actions and ofcourse as a way to imbibe the fear/ consciousness of Allah in anindividual. The Saudi men in Saffiyahs article would have done the same anywhere they would go if there was no fear of Allah and with conscience would refrain from doing the same anywhere they would go as well. may Allah guide us all to the Straight Path.

31. Scottsaid:November 30th, 2006 at 1:09 pm

Would you not reason that it is greater to do good for the sake of doing good then it is to do good for the sake Fear of Allah. It seemthough doing good in the world as a means to prevent personal persecrution in the afterlife is frankly selfish. I am hopeful that much world chooses to do good in the interest of other people rather then in ones own personal interest. If the latter is true, personally I wofeel humanity is morally bankrupt.


Would you not reason that it is greater to do good for the sake of doing good then it is to do good for the sake of Fear of Allah? Itseems as though doing good in the world as a means to prevent personal persecrution in the afterlife is frankly selfish. I am hopeful tthe majority of the world chooses to do good in the interest of other people rather then in ones own personal interest. If the latter is tpersonally I would feel humanity is morally bankrupt.


I am a fairly new blogger and the above comments were one of my first. So obviouly, i was a bit nervous about anyone reading mycomments and that someone would actually comment on them was a far thought. So thanks to all those who read my comment andspecially to those who took time out to commnet back.

Well , to think about it broadly, an individuals actions would eventually be good or bad for that individual as well as for the other peor for the society as a whole anyway. I wrote the above points thinking about my own correction rather than how it would effect otheyou think about life as an examination, you would obvioulsy think about the consequences of failing or passing and it will be your owactions that you would be concerned about. But now I realise, as I write this comment, that I will be judged not only on my own actiothat affected me but also on how my actions or words affected other people around me. That brings me in a position of being aresponsible human being. Responsible both for myself as well as others. And when I realise that i have to be responsible for others th

question of being selfish completely disappears. because you are then trying to mend your own ways as well as of others (though I wnot like the reader to think that I am assuming the right to impose my ideas or practices on other people, including those who are closme like my spouse or children). Collective good is what I mean to say which would involve coming together and thinking of ways thlead to actions that are good for everyone as a whole. Thinking about the hereafter or afterlife is nothing but a personal motivating fafor me and for many other people to carry out good actions and simply thinking about the affects of your actions on yourself and on opeople because of the Fear of Allah doesnt make you selfish. It infact makes you more un-selfish. Doesnt this place Fear of Allaand Unselfishness on the same side of the coin?


Thanks for replying to my question, hopefully this leads to a healthy debate.

I am not denying that Deities can be used as a useful tool to spread goodwill in the world. That is without question and frankly besidepoint. Conversely I was pointing to what the inherent underlying motivation was for peoples actions. Therefore the question I am asin its most simple form is what is the most noble? If people are only doing good to ensure personal salvation in the afterlife then whadoes that say about us as people? If the basis of peoples moral compass is simply to please the great surveillance camera in the sky would hasten that is a pretty contemptible reason to be good. Doing good is its own reward and is in its purest sense the most noble.

35. Barakasaid:December 7th, 2006 at 3:32 pm

Salaam,

Subhan-Allah! Beautifully written - it made me weep.

Umrah mubarik, may its baraka infuse your life long after youve returned.




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36. Fahad Shaikhsaid:December 24th, 2006 at 11:48 pm

Salam Safiyah. I was just just searching for peoples experiences on Hajj and came across your Blog. I dont know how to say this, buyour words really touched me. I have never read someone narrate their experience the way you did. I am going for Hajj tommorow ajust wanted to say you have been blessed with a way of words and as long as you dont mind I look forward to your blogs in the futur

Salam,

Fahad Shaikh

37. kimyasaid:December 27th, 2006 at 9:56 am

Salaam, Safiyya

I was just reminded of my own Hajj experience a year ago, deep and emotive imagery brought forth by this beautiful rendering of yoUmrah, Mashallah!

I hope that the months succeeding your journey have been immensely fulfilling and that the soul-nourishment that you received contto sustain you into eternity! You write superbly movingly and I hope to read more of your works as time progresses, inshallah!

Kind Regards

From South Africa

38. Yusufsaid:December 27th, 2006 at 9:57 am

What an inspiring article. You make us all regret for not being there.

On a side note, Medinah does seem to be much more organized then Mecca.

39. Yusufsaid:December 27th, 2006 at 10:05 am

Oh, and I forgot to add, the duas you make when you first see the kaba, youll remember them for the rest of your life. I had two frie

who accompanied me by the kaaba, and since they had previously performed Umrah, they allowed me to open my eyes right infrontthe kaba. Ah, beautiful memories

40. iMuslimsaid:December 27th, 2006 at 10:07 am

Salaams Safiyyah,

mashallah, i cannot add to the favourable comments above. I just pray that Allah accepts your Umrah and other deeds and forgives yfor any shortcomings. I went for Hajj in 2004. Now Hajj time has returned i have thought about sharing some of my experience, but inot think i could come close to truly expressing what it was like.

Two of the best moments of my short life were on Hajj. The first was with my Creator on Arafat and the second was with a fellowmuslim during my Tawaaf-az-Ziyarah. I think i will keep the Arafat one to myself, because it is too special to share and i dont wish pollute it with corrupt intentions of showing off, which i know i am capable off, astagfirullah. However the second was so amazing ibrings tears to my eyes when i describe it to anyone inshallah ill try and write about it on my blog this week!

Wasalam sister

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