Heaven questionnaireHeaven questionnaire

By NathanBy Nathan

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Do you have spare money that Do you have spare money that you would be willing to give you would be willing to give

awayaway

YESYES NONO

Do you like to travelDo you like to travel

YESYES NONO

Would you be prepared to fight to Would you be prepared to fight to get in to heavenget in to heaven

YESYES NONO

CrusaderCrusader Do you think your brave Do you think your brave

enough? Think you have enough? Think you have what it takes to kill those what it takes to kill those putrid Muslims? Well then putrid Muslims? Well then go to the holy lands and go to the holy lands and chase those Muslims out chase those Muslims out of Jerusalem and out of of Jerusalem and out of Jesus' realm. It’s Jesus' realm. It’s dangerous work but god dangerous work but god will be pleased if you tried will be pleased if you tried and you will have 100% and you will have 100% chance of going into chance of going into heaven if you succeed. heaven if you succeed. Play again

PILGRIMPILGRIM Love to travel but hate to Love to travel but hate to

fight? Well this is the job fight? Well this is the job for you. Go out with your for you. Go out with your friends and spread he friends and spread he word of God. You even get word of God. You even get to go to many holy places to go to many holy places like Lourdes in France. like Lourdes in France. Think of it! Having fun, Think of it! Having fun, travelling and just some travelling and just some easy praying and you can easy praying and you can get into heaven. SIMPLE. get into heaven. SIMPLE. You will also see many You will also see many holy relics and even the holy relics and even the Turin Shroud: the cloth Turin Shroud: the cloth that Jesus was buried in!that Jesus was buried in!

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CHARITY WORKERCHARITY WORKER Want to get into heaven Want to get into heaven

without giving up ordinary without giving up ordinary life? Got a bit of money you life? Got a bit of money you don’t need? Don’t like to don’t need? Don’t like to much work? Well here is a job much work? Well here is a job tailored for you. All you have tailored for you. All you have to do is some “Good Works” to do is some “Good Works” by helping the poor by by helping the poor by washing their feet or giving washing their feet or giving them bread or even buy an them bread or even buy an indulgence from a pardoner indulgence from a pardoner and God will forgive all your and God will forgive all your sins. Just a small bit of “dosh” sins. Just a small bit of “dosh” to the church when you die to the church when you die and heaven will be a coming and heaven will be a coming your way!!!!!!!your way!!!!!!!

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Would you like to spend a lot of Would you like to spend a lot of time in a church or monasterytime in a church or monastery

YESYES NONO

Would you mind a lot of physical Would you mind a lot of physical workwork

YESYES NONO

Do you like to socializeDo you like to socialize

YESYES NONO

AUGUSTINIAN MONKAUGUSTINIAN MONK Hate the toughness of Hate the toughness of

life? Yet you don’t want life? Yet you don’t want to be ‘completely’ out of to be ‘completely’ out of touch from the rest of touch from the rest of the cruel world? Spend the cruel world? Spend the day in a quiet prayer the day in a quiet prayer while still having a nice while still having a nice chat with travellers and chat with travellers and giving people medical giving people medical care for the local village. care for the local village. We even have modern We even have modern toilets. Doesn’t that toilets. Doesn’t that sound good.sound good.

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TRAPPIST MONKTRAPPIST MONK Do you have Do you have

ambition? Do you ambition? Do you have no friends or have no friends or don’t speak with your don’t speak with your family? Well then, family? Well then, you will love this. You you will love this. You will take two vows will take two vows one of poverty and one of poverty and one of silence. But one of silence. But you will make and you will make and drink the best bear in drink the best bear in all the land. Who all the land. Who needs family?needs family?

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CISTERCIAN LAY CISTERCIAN LAY BROTHERBROTHER

Are you good at hard Are you good at hard physical work? Need physical work? Need a chance to shine? a chance to shine? Come along to the Come along to the monastery and work monastery and work as a simple builder or as a simple builder or plumber. Although plumber. Although you will take a few you will take a few vows of poverty and vows of poverty and silence its an easy silence its an easy job. Just think doing job. Just think doing simple jobs gets you simple jobs gets you into heaven.into heaven. Play again

Would you mind inflicting pain Would you mind inflicting pain on your self to get into heavenon your self to get into heaven

YESYES NONO

FLAGELLENTFLAGELLENT Are you brave? Can Are you brave? Can

you endure pain? you endure pain? Want a simple way Want a simple way into heaven? All you into heaven? All you have to do is go have to do is go around whipping around whipping yourself for your yourself for your sins and there you sins and there you go. Your not a go. Your not a chicken are you?chicken are you?

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FRANCISCAN FRIERFRANCISCAN FRIER Don’t mind a life Don’t mind a life

with god? But still with god? But still want to travel want to travel around and help around and help normal people. All normal people. All you have to do is you have to do is spread the word of spread the word of Jesus and take a Jesus and take a vow of poverty then vow of poverty then all your sins will be all your sins will be forgivenforgiven

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