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He Makes Our Name Tags In most communities, name tags are something you wear at conventions, but in Hawthorne they are a way of life. We wear them everywhere except bed, and sometimes I suspect some of us wear them there, too, although I personally have no proof of this. Which brings me to Leslie Gutekunst, whose German name, he assured me, means "good craftsman," most appropriate in his case. In a 10-foot addition to his utility room, he has built a paneled, air-conditioned work-room which he shares with wife Illa's washer and dryer. And here, on his little 01' "tracer-guided engraving machine" he turns out name tags. Boy! Does he ever turn out name tags! Les Gutekunst is a study in concentration as he works on his tracer-guided engraving machine that turns out our beautiful name tags. You can get plastic name tags in any color to pin or clip on your lapel or hang on a chain. You can order a nameplate and holder to screw on the top of your mailbox, or engraved brass name plates for the back of your bowling shoes. The bowling shoe tag fad hit the ultimate, says Les, when one of his customers ordered a left- foot tag reading "lots a" and a right-foot tag saying "luck." He also makes plastic signs for the Hawthorne Library, trophy signs for everything from shuffleboard winners to fishermen who take their catch as to the taxidermist, and wooden house numbering signs for Sun Lake residents. Leslie and Illa moved here in 1975 from Jackson, Mich. where Les spent 19 years running a Shell station and 16 years as a salesman for Production Tool Supply. When he arrived, Harry Van Driver was supplying Hawthorne's name tags, but when Harry left Gutekunst bought an engraving machine and took over. "It keeps me pretty busy," he says. "It gives me something to do without tying me down. It's been a challenge to get the right spacing and I've cut up a few sheets of plastic by mistake." He also cut his finger the other day, but that was on a power saw working with wood. After a trip to the hospital emergency room and about eight stitches, it's "coming around." "It's the first time I've done anything like that in 55 years," the craftsmen said sheepishly. "I must be getting old." But not too old to keep those name tags coming, folks. - Don Dornbrook

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Page 1: He Makes Our Name Tagshawthorne.ipage.com/historical1/images/PennNotes/1982...He Makes Our Name Tags In most communities, name tags are something you wear at conventions, but in Hawthorne

He Makes Our Name TagsIn most communities, name tags are

something you wear at conventions, but inHawthorne they are a way of life. We wear themeverywhere except bed, and sometimes I suspectsome of us wear them there, too, although Ipersonally have no proof of this.

Which brings me to Leslie Gutekunst,whose German name, he assured me, means"good craftsman," most appropriate in his case.In a 10-foot addition to his utility room, he hasbuilt a paneled, air-conditioned work-roomwhich he shares with wife Illa's washer anddryer. And here, on his little 01' "tracer-guidedengraving machine" he turns out name tags.

Boy! Does he ever turn out name tags!

Les Gutekunst is a study in concentration as heworks on his tracer-guided engraving machinethat turns out our beautiful name tags.

You can get plastic name tags in any colorto pin or clip on your lapel or hang on a chain.You can order a nameplate and holder to screwon the top of your mailbox, or engraved brassname plates for the back of your bowling shoes.The bowling shoe tag fad hit the ultimate, saysLes, when one of his customers ordered a left-foot tag reading "lots a" and a right-foot tagsaying "luck."

He also makes plastic signs for theHawthorne Library, trophy signs for everythingfrom shuffleboard winners to fishermen who taketheir catch as to the taxidermist, and woodenhouse numbering signs for Sun Lake residents.

Leslie and Illa moved here in 1975 fromJackson, Mich. where Les spent 19 yearsrunning a Shell station and 16 years as asalesman for Production Tool Supply. When hearrived, Harry Van Driver was supplyingHawthorne's name tags, but when Harry leftGutekunst bought an engraving machine andtook over.

"It keeps me pretty busy," he says. "It givesme something to do without tying me down. It'sbeen a challenge to get the right spacing and I'vecut up a few sheets of plastic by mistake."

He also cut his finger the other day, but thatwas on a power saw working with wood. After atrip to the hospital emergency room and abouteight stitches, it's "coming around."

"It's the first time I've done anything likethat in 55 years," the craftsmen said sheepishly."I must be getting old."

But not too old to keep those name tagscoming, folks.

- Don Dornbrook

Page 2: He Makes Our Name Tagshawthorne.ipage.com/historical1/images/PennNotes/1982...He Makes Our Name Tags In most communities, name tags are something you wear at conventions, but in Hawthorne

The Florida Council on Aging did it again!Yep ... that's right... another conference. And,once again, a successful conference. June 1-4,at the Sheraton Twin Towers in Orlando, insession with the Southern Gerontological Societyand ACTION, and in cooperation withNRTAI AARP, "Aging in the South: Resourcesin a Time of Transition" was presented to anaudience of 300 service providers to the elderlythroughout the South.

Keynote, plenary, workshop andsymposium speakers were distinguished expertsinvolved in a wide range of gerontologicalprograms across the entire continent. Greetingsand awards were presented by Mrs. AdeleGraham, First Lady of Florida.

Emphasis was placed on nutrition andexercise as being major factors to a better andpossibly longer life. Disease is unnatural. Weshould expect and strive toward healthy olderage -- present day studies reveal that there is noreason why a human being cannot live to be125. The greatest cause of death in the WesternSociety is disease of the heart and blood vessels -- again... this (disease) is unnatural and can beprevented with proper diet and physical fitness.

The concept of the private sector becominginvolved in programs for the older American is"catching on." Many large corporations haveestablished employee volunteer programs whichlend a helping hand at senior citizen centers, lifecare facilities, etc. This reinforces my idea thatworthy programs can, and will, survive despitetoday's economic situation.

We, here at Hawthorne, are ahead of ourtime. Just now is the idea "taking hold" thatsenior advisory groups be involved in theplanning, development and implementation oftheir programs.

"Talk is in the air" that perhaps the role ofretirement be taught to the young and middle-aged, so that retirement might be well-plannedand rightfully anticipated as one of the mostrewarding periods of our lives.

This conference was the most informative Ihave attended. I saw a lot of old friends and meta lot of new ones. And, still... I am ranting andraving about that wonderful group ... The FloridaCouncil on Aging. -Carolyn B. Orme

OurOwnGo-GoClub

Every Hawthorne resident is a member ofthe Travel Club, we are reminded by Dick Ray,in his third term as chairman.

Elections and meetings are wide open andeveryone can take part. The club is not meant tomake a profit. On occasion, when more personsthan were originally enrolled join the outing,some profit results and is immediately distributedamong the travelers.

Some trips are short and snappy -- to CapeCanaveral or Cypress Gardens, for example.Others are long and luxurious, like the cruise tothe Caribbean last March. The club aims tosponsor trips that appeal to as many differenttastes and interests as possible.

Hawthorne Travel Club opportunities in thefuture include:

July 26-28, Plantation Inn, with CrystalRiver cruise and visits to Weeki Wachee, TarponSprings and Ocala; Aug. 18-20, new HolidayInn on Longboat Key at Sarasota, a paddlewheelboat cruise and a theater performance; earlySeptember, the World's Fair, Knoxville; beforethe end of September, Disney World; Oct. 27,Busch Gardens, Tampa; Thanksgiving, BocaRaton; Christmas, San Antonio, Texas; mid-April, Barbados. Details are always found on theTriangle.

Trips of varying duration -- to distant places,scenic spots, famous restaurants or well-knownattractions -- will be added later, offering a widechoice of possible journeys to Hawthorne'sTravel Club members, meaning all of us.

- Marie L. Richardson

Penn Notes StaffEditor Don DornbrookAssociate Editor. . . . . . . . . . . . . . Carolyn OrmePhotographers John Tienken,

Don ComunaleStaff Margaret Albro, Elnora Bolan,

Anna K. Merlino, Marie Richardson,Edith Schipper, Rosalind Sykes,

Bill Wilkinson

Page 3: He Makes Our Name Tagshawthorne.ipage.com/historical1/images/PennNotes/1982...He Makes Our Name Tags In most communities, name tags are something you wear at conventions, but in Hawthorne

Showing Their Mettle

Competing in the Big Sun Senior Games atthe Central Florida Community College in Ocala,Betty Arp, Eleanor McLatchy, Ray Hendersonand Art Kozlik brought seven gold and two silvermedals back to Hathorne recently.

Making a splash for the Hawthorne swimteam were Betty Arp and Ray Henderson, whowon three gold medals each, and EleanorMcLatchy, who won one gold and one silver.Art Kozlik was awarded a silver medal for tabletennis.

One husband, two wives, one grandmotherand Iva Winiger provided the cheering section.

- Ray Henderson

Florida's Lt. Governor Wayne Mixon waswelcomed to Hawthorne by Amos Henley at arecent Clubhouse gathering. Mixon substitutedfor Governor Bob Graham who was ill and hadto cancel a scheduled visit.

Beware of Flying Peacocks"What in the world was that?" cried my

startled wife as a feathery blur bounced off thewindshield of our car as we were driving east onState Highway 48.

"That, my dear, was a flying peacock,"replied.

"You're kidding," she answered."I kid you not. Look -- the feathers are still

flying."And so they were. But our big bird seemed

to be none the worse for wear. He hied himselfoff to the nearby farm, mustering as muchdignity as he could.

Living in Hawthorne has taught us not to betoo surprised by nature anymore. Like the nightour headlights picked up the spooky eyes of anopossum in the middle of Hawthorne Boulevard.Or the morning we were awakened by the rat-a-tat-tat of a pileated woodpecker drilling holes inthe Hawthorne billboard at the back gate.

Friends and neighbors report similarexperiences, such as:

A family of raccoons frequently stages a freethree-ring circus in the big old oak tree aroundwhich Bougainvillea considerately winds for theedification of Ralph and Dorothy Pyle and theamusement of Joe and Peg Keifer.

John Harmon used to have rabbit problems.Then came the foxes. No more rabbit problems.Just foxes.

Helen and Lee Mackin up Palo Verde wayget a closeup view of the interesting armadillo,

"a burrowing mammal having a jointed,protective covering of bony plates," according toThe American College Dictionary.

They do like to burrow, all right, accordingto Lee.

Lon and Tillie Flanders like to walk andwatch birds. They report no shortage offeathered friends at Hawthorne -- from babyowls to hawks, eagles, and, on occasion, evenvultures!

There are the morning sounds of crowingroosters, moo-ing cows and barking dogs. Thereare four-legged lawn mowers (otherwise knownas horses) trimming the grass in the farm pasturebehind Oleander. And there are night sounds --sometimes a symphony of croaking frogs and amysterious bird that seems to be saying "w-h-o-o-e-e-e-e, w-h-o-o-e-e-e-e." And, of course,ducks and turtles on our pretty little lakes.

And then there was the too-healthy-lookingmottled brown snake we encountered comingout of the men's locker room one afternoon.

A call to Security brought a brave man anda girl who snared the four-footer, skillfullydeposited it in a plastic bag and took it over tothe Marina for Charlie, our resident alligator.

But you can't escape from nature by merelyleaving Hawthorne -- especially if your vacationis spent on Sanibel Island.

I know you may find this hard to believe,but it really happened:

I was bitten by a pelican! - Don Dornbrook

Page 4: He Makes Our Name Tagshawthorne.ipage.com/historical1/images/PennNotes/1982...He Makes Our Name Tags In most communities, name tags are something you wear at conventions, but in Hawthorne

Something To Think AboutQuestion: What does mail fraud have to do

with agriculture in China?Answer: Both are topics discussed at

Hawthorne Forum meetings during the last twoyears.

And the diversity of Forum programs doesnot end there.

Local concerns are reflected in discussionsof the future of Leesburg, highway safety, theduties of Lake County offices, the new pricescanners in Publix supermarket, the changingface of justice.

Subjects ranging farther afield includeAfrican culture, the people of Rhodesia, healthand medical practice in Russia, the Food andAgricultural Organization of the United Nations,our trillion-dollar navy.

Speakers are represented by educators, ajudge, a U.S. Navy lieutenant, legislators, anewspaper columnist, doctors (medical andother) , an authority on Florida railroading.Several Hawthorne residents have contributedprograms, one of which was a panel discussionof adventures at Elderhostels Overseas.

The arrangements for Forum eventssometimes entail complications, as RalphHumphrey, 1980-82 Forum committeechairman, will testify.

In his efforts to reach State TrooperSergeant Kirby, Ralph telephoned all over thecounty to find Kirby always "out on emergency."He finally traced the sergeant to the LakeCounty Fair and drove there to secure hisservices as Forum speaker.

A similar experience involved RandallSanderson, Director of Operations for the new

Orlando International Airport. After numeroustelephone calls were unsuccessful in reachingSanderson, Ralph hied himself to the airport.

There he found the place in an uproar; itjust so happened that it was moving day fromthe old facility to the new. Ralph managed tohave Sanderson paged but had about given uphope of meeting him when an employee spottedSanderson in the melee. Ralph introducedhimself to the busy director, who took him to aquiet spot, listened to Ralph's request, andcheerfully agreed to the Forum engagement.

The failure of a speaker to arrive atHawthorne gave Ralph one of his fewdisappointments. He had driven to Gainesvillethree times to arrange for a special programabout new developments in medicine andscience at the Veterans Administration andShands Teaching Hospital.

The speaker was to be a student, a memberof the University of Florida's prestigious BlueKey Club of outstanding students who give talksall over the state. She was given carefuldirections to Hawthorne but got lost on the way!

But Ralph's chagrin gave way to pleasurewhen Hawthorne resident Abe Anellis agreed tospeak extemporaneously about his field, thepreservation of foods by irradiation, a talk thatresulted in enthusiastic response from anappreciative audience.

No Forum meetings are scheduled for Julyor August, but the fourth Tuesday evening inSeptember will inaugurate another season ofstimulating programs, with Geb Gebler as 1982-83 chairman.

- Marie L. Richardson

Informative andentertaining are aptdescriptions of The Forumat Hawthorne, chaired ablyduring the last two years byRalph Humphrey whorecently relinquished thereins to 1982-83 chairmanGeb Gebbler.

Page 5: He Makes Our Name Tagshawthorne.ipage.com/historical1/images/PennNotes/1982...He Makes Our Name Tags In most communities, name tags are something you wear at conventions, but in Hawthorne

Snow and sleetrarely impede thepath of our faithfulBulletin delivers butrain and 100 degreetemperatures don'tstand in their wayeither. The efficiencyof our successfuldistribution networkis due in great partto the efforts ofthese three men whohave chaired thecommittee; FrankFagan, DaltonBackus and HankParks.

They Bring Home The BulletinEarly in 1974 the Program Advisory

Committee under the direction of Dr. EarlKauffman, then program director, commissionedHank Parks to develop and organize thedistribution of the weekly Bulletin.

Hank, with straightforward efficiency,divided the park into 9 zones. He appointedzone captains to handle the distribution of thebulletins each week, thus initiating a veryimportant ongoing service in our community.

In late 1975 Frank Fagan rezoned the wholePark in view of its expected growth. A formeremployee, John Rankin, mapped the area sonew zones were easily incorporated. Frankserved as captain from 1975 to 1980, coveringthe largest growth period with good humor andever prompt courtesy.

Dalton Backus was appointed chairman inJuly, 1980, when 63 zones covered thephenomenal growth of the park. At present CliffDickerson assists in this tremendous undertakingof our most important line of communications.

They streamlined and more efficientlyregrouped the zones to form five districts. Eachdistrict has a captain charged with theresponsibility of choosing a group to pick up anddeliver the bulletins. In addition to Dalton andCliff, Jim Moore, Chris Criscimagna and BobWinther are the stalwarts that involve more than100 carriers.

The residents owe these friends andneighbors a vote of appreciation, so in typicalHawthorne spirit we honored them June 15,with a special TV Program which outlined and

brought us up-to-date on this committed taskthey undertake week after week in goodsportsmanship.

A reception followed with refreshmentsserved by the hospitality committee. Thus we allhad an opportunity to thank personally andcongratulate these folks who come to our dooreach week. This is not only an unbroken line ofcommunication over the years, it is a servicewhich maintains the caring, sharing and devotionbinding us together.

The next time a bulletin is placed in yourclip - open the door and greet your news carrier!Give him or her a cheery "Hello," and inquire asto whether or not you may be of assistance indelivering the bulletin in the future.

- Anna K. Merlino

The StormThe thunder roars. The clouds have burst!The skies have opened and drenched the

earth.From out of its dark engulfing wrathThe heavens have given the earth its bath.From out of its fury -- the clouds colliding,Screaming, threatening, then subsiding.

The rains have ceased, the storm is gone.The world's aglow, serene and warm.

- Minnie Goodman

Page 6: He Makes Our Name Tagshawthorne.ipage.com/historical1/images/PennNotes/1982...He Makes Our Name Tags In most communities, name tags are something you wear at conventions, but in Hawthorne

Bill Paquette and his corn field. Gardeners share wheel barrows and other gardening tools.

See How Their Gardens GrowSurrounded by the shade of protecting live

oak trees, many residents take pride - andsustenance - in farm plots located just beyondHawthorne's curving marigold-adorned entranceoff U.S. 27. There, in May's harvest, theyproduced dewy-fresh cucumbers, green peppers,lettuce, zucchini, corn, strawberries andtomatoes.

And that's not all, folks! Those gardens areplanted for summer with 'cover crops' of sweetpotatoes, soy beans, peanuts and pumpkins, toenrich their meals during late summer. InOctober, the enterprising Hawthorne gardenerswill plant another batch of garden produce thatwill supply them with fresh vegetables forThanksgiving and Christmas dinners. Talk aboutthe Land of Milk and Honey - we're in it!

Gerard Frison planted the seed for farmplots for Hawthornites in 1977. He discussedgardening with Amos Henley, who showedFrison the area where he, himself, had planted agarden.

"You can build gardening plots right here,"he said. Then Henley arranged for water lines,for Gene Fuller to grade the land with a rototillerand sent the surveyor to help Gerard layout theplots.

By Fall, 1977, gardening was in full sway.The 60-some participating gardeners collectedfunds. Gerard took the money to Henley, whoordered a Hawthorne truck to pick up anddeliver a large load of Ralston-Purina compost tothe garden. All in all, much manpower andmoney was poured into the garden plots.

Most of the plots are 15 by 15 feet. Waterspigots are placed about 50 feet apart to flow

water where needed. Available tools lean againsta huge accommodating oak. Two wheelbarrows,sporting Hawthorne logos, stand at-the-ready inthe shade. They're handy for trucking the piledthatch that the gardeners share.

What's that you say - not a care in theworld?

Just know that they also share steel traps tocatch rabbits, raccoons, possum and armadillos.So, they get meat, as well as produce.

But it isn't all gravy. Rabbits nibble away atthe produce. And at night raccoons harvest thecanteloupes, corn and watermelons. BillPaquette commented, "Those raccoons will eatthe corn right on the stalk and just leave thestripped cob hanging."

Harold Watterson plays a transister radio allnight long to scare the varmints. Harold said,"The radio kept the raccoons away for twoyears, but this year it didn't work. The fellowsare kidding me that all I'm doing is furnishingthem with dinner music!"

Even so, Harold says that gardening is hisgreatest pleasure. He has completed 80 hours ofagriculture studies in Orlando, plus a writtenexam, that gives him the title of MasterGardener. He has conducted a gardening classat Hawthorne and is happy to help anyone withgardening problems.

Garden Chairman Otto Bryant garnered 24quarts of strawberries off his garden in May. Hesays there is one plot available at this time.

If interested in joining the gardener'sgastronomic delights, call him at 787-9514.

- Rosalind Macrae Sykes

Page 7: He Makes Our Name Tagshawthorne.ipage.com/historical1/images/PennNotes/1982...He Makes Our Name Tags In most communities, name tags are something you wear at conventions, but in Hawthorne

He's Got Those Piano Roll BluesI pushed the doorbell button at the home of

John and Harriet O'Loughlin, and the tinkling,music box sounds of "Oh, What a BeautifulMorning" filled the air of a beautiful morning.

"That's quite a doorbell you've got there," Isaid as the master of the house appeared.

"Thanks," he replied with a smile as hereached behind a nearby panel and made anadjustment. Then he pushed the button.

This time we got the Notre Dame fight song."We've got our choice of 29 tunes," he

explained. "One at a time, of course."Inside, he invited me to sit at a big, round

oak table that had as its centerpiece a smallbottle of Heinz tomato ketchup. As I reached formy note pad he reached for the ketchup, twistedthe cap -- and lo! a local disc jockey went into hisact.

The ketchup bottle was a transistor radio.If you've guessed by now that the

O'Loughlins are not ordinary people, youguessed right. And if you guessed that theirs isnot your ordinary mobile home you guessedright again. After all, in how many mobile homeswill you find the following?

Three player grand pianos -- including agorgeous Stein way in the living room.

Some 4,000 music rolls, among which isthe original of George Gershwin playing his ownclassic, "Rhapsody in Blue," in 1924; oneautographed by 99-year-old Hubie Blake, star ofthe Broadway hit musical, "Hubie!" and anotherautographed by Jimmy Durante.

A dozen or more music boxes, ranging insize from a small, hand-carved figure of a manleaning against a lamp post {it plays "The BearWent Over the Mountain"} to a mahoganyRegina automatic changer music box, at leastthree feet wide and five feet high.

A collection of several hundred dolls of allsizes, shapes and descriptions; a collection of100 or more pewter ice cream molds; miniaturepaintings on ivory; French porcelains andRussian enamels; a collection of Lalique Frenchglassware; musical watches and charms.

How did the O'Loughlins find room for allthis Americana in a mobile home? It wasn't easy.

"We moved here from a three-story housein Omaha, Nebraska," said John. "It had athree-car garage, but we never could get a singlecar in it. We had a six-month garage sale, andwe foisted off a lot of stuff on our kids."

John was a Pure Oil Co. engineer inChicago until after World War II when he andHarriet moved to Omaha and he became amanufacturer's agent.

"I retired in 1975," he recalled, "and I hadhad four heart go-arounds; I couldn't stand cold.We read about Hawthorne in the NationalObserver; we had never been in Florida.

"We came here in 1976 -- and we're stillunpacking!" - Don Dornbrook

A beautiful antique music box is included inJohn O'Loughlin's extensive collection of musicalmemoribilia as are some 4,000 music rolls forplayer pianos.

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Uninvited Guests Stole Her HeartHave you ever expected three overnight

guests, but had five descend on you?That was my experience when, on April 20,

a bird fluttered out of my Christmas cactus plantbetween my utility room and house. Imagine mysurprise when I found a completed nest restingamong the cactus stems.

Jenny Wren and I became well acquaintedas I daily assured her that I would not disturb herin the successful delivery of her young. For twoweeks she sat patiently and dutifully, and onMay 11 two birds ventured forth followed bythree more in the next few days. Their eyes wereclosed, but five mouths, when open, virtuallyfilled the nest.

It kept both Jack and Jenny Wren busyfinding worms and bugs to satisfy their babies'hunger. For a week Jenny not only fed heryoung, she also kept them warm until there wasno longer space for her in the nest.

On May 18 and 19 Eeny, Meeny, Miney,Moe and Doe had their first glimpse of the worldabout them when 10 eyes were open, and onMay 22 the birds began to chirp. For severaldays Mama and Papa Wren appeared morefrequently as if concerned about their children'sfirst venture from the nest.

On Sunday, May 23, Eeny, Meeny, Mineyand Moe took off, first on my steps, then thebumper of my car, the hood, the top, then thetrellises, one rung at a time, higher and higher,then on to the hanging baskets. And Jenny andJack Wren were promptly there to cheer themon.

What a beautiful bird sanctuary was mycarport that afternoon. I felt as though Ihad hada part in it. But I was also sad because I knewmy friends would promptly be on their way tomore lofty spheres.

Medic AlertIf your husband's eyes look glassy and his

forehead's a bit hotAnd if he's driving in and out of

Hawthorne quite a lotAnd if his heart is beating faster than its

normal rateThat rascal has his eye on the Police

girl at the gate.- Ethel McQuillan

Doe remained in her nest until Monday, the24th when Jenny and Jack escorted her throughsomewhat the same routine. My only concernwas that the rains came that evening, and Ihoped my friends found dry shelters.

Jenny and Jack Wren; Eeny, Meeny,Miney, Moe and Doe, fare thee well! Althoughuninvited, you were the most welcome andinteresting guests. Your credit is excellent.

Please come back some time . You couldnot have found a more tranquil place thanHawthorne to deliver your young.

- Tabby Voelzke

Who Is the Gremlin?Who is the Gremlin who comes to my house -Musses my closets ... then sly as a mouseTangles my knitting and snarls all my threads;Rumples the papers; leaves dust under beds? ..

Overflows trash cans; unmatches my hose;Scorches my pans, and outdates all my clothes;Muddies my shoes, and puts rips in my slacks;Breaks my best dishes; adds chipping and

cracks ...Laundry unwashes; unvacuums the rugs;Burns all the baking; encourages bugs;Furniture ruins by scratching the paint;Clogs up the plumbing ... (This Gremlin's no

Saintl) ...Wilts all the house plants; my eye glasses

hide;Adds pounds and inches, though diets I've

tried;Wrinkles my face, and then thins out my hair;Trips on my toes so Ifall down the stair. ..

Misplaces keys to my car door and trunk;Ruins my antiques until they are junk;Unanswers letters; my gas tank runs dry;Check book unbalances, making me cry ...

Gives me a headache and stomachache bad;(Ow! I'm beginning to really feel sad!)Clutters the frige with left-overs and beer;Pushes and unlabels them to the rear ...

Keeps all my coupons beyond their last date;Unwinds my clocks so they stop - or run late;Opens the windows and lets in the rain;Ruins my curtains ... (This Gremlin's a pain!)

Now that you know from such trials I'mnot free,

Are you amazed that this Gremlin is ME?

- Ruth J. Campbell