HABITS

Habits

Success in Self-Control

By June Hunt

"You are not born with your habits—you weave them and wear them. Your habits can be the rags of self-centered addictions or the robes of Christ-centered self-control."

—June Hunt

DEFINITIONS

Interestingly, in most dictionaries the first definition for the word habit reveals it to be "a type of clothing that is characteristic of a certain calling, rank or function." Eventually a habit came to be "a pattern of behavior acquired by frequent repetition that reflects the prevailing character of a person."1 The Bible is interwoven with the same concept: Your habits characterize your character. If you are a Christian, your calling is to be clothed in the habit of Christ, with the result that your character actually reflects His character.Rom 13:14

A. Basic Inclinations An inclination is a natural desire that compels you to act a certain way under a given set of circumstances. The Bible says everyone comes into this world with natural inclinations to sin.Ps 58:3

When these negative impulses are not controlled, they eventually grow into habits, some of which become life-threatening addictions.Gen 6:5

· Impulse An impulse is a sudden, spontaneous inclination to act impetuously.2 Eccl 5:2

· Habit A habit is a pattern of behavior acquired by frequent repetition.3 2 Kings 17:40

· Obsession

An obsession is a persistent, disturbing preoccupation with an unreasonable idea.4 Acts 26:11

· Compulsion A compulsion is an irresistible, irrational impulse to act against one's own will.5 1 Cor 7:37

· Addiction An addiction is a compulsive, overpowering dependence on an object, an action or a feeling, resulting in major life problems.6 Titus 2:3

B. Biblical Beginnings A habit is either cork or lead: it pushes you up or pulls you down. To understand the potential good or bad of your habits, look at the context of Scripture to draw some helpful conclusions.In the Old Testament, the Hebrew word derek, usually translated as "way" or "road," means "habit or habitual way of behavior." 7 Prov 3:5-6

Conclusion:

· Habits can be beneficial and profitable.2 Kings 17:13

· Habits can be evil or destructive.2 Kings 21:21

· Habits can be passed down from generation to generation.2 Chron 17:6

· Good habits reflect God's character.Job 17:9

· Good habits strengthen character.Job 22:28

· Good habits are a choice.In the New Testament, the Greek word manthano means "to learn" (in any way) or to "get into the habit."8 Titus 3:14

· Habits are learned behavior.1 Tim 5:13

· One bad habit can lead to other bad habits.The Greek word hodos, which means a "natural path or way," is used metaphorically in Scripture to mean "a course of conduct or way of thinking."9 Heb 3:10

· Hearts are led astray by ungodly habits.2 Peter 2:2

· False teachers habitually malign the way of truth.The Greek noun anastrophe, usually translated "life" or "way of life," means "one's conduct or behavior."10 Eph 4:22

· A Christian is equipped to overcome bad habits.Heb 13:7

· A Christian's good habits are a witness to others.Matt 5:16

CHARACTERISTICS

A. Beauty or Beast A German shepherd can be trained as the ferocious accomplice to evil intent. Yet, this same highly intelligent canine is also schooled to be a helpful companion for the visually impaired. This is learned behavior! In the same way, habits are learned behaviors that become a powerful force in your life for good or bad. Every habit is either Christ-centered or self-centered . . . a virtue or a vice . . . potentially a beauty or a beast!All Habits Are . . .

Habitual occur with regularityAutomatic happen without thinkingBehavioral reflect inner moralsIntense grow stronger and more ingrainedTenacious persist and become hard to changeSatisfying provide a degree of pleasureLuke 16:13

B. Bondage Index Scripture uses words like strongholds, slavery and bondage to paint a picture of being a prisoner to sin.11 Although you may not be enslaved to the more visible vices (drunkenness or gluttony), you may be held captive to a seemingly "acceptable activity" or to destructive and unChristlike attitudes. Even good behavior, such as church work, can be overindulged in to the degree that it crosses over the boundary of God's will and becomes sin.12 2 Peter 2:19

Heart Habits

Sinful thoughts and emotions, if nurtured in your heart, take control and eventually produce negative behavior.

Matt 15:19

· anger · materialism · arrogance· prejudice · criticism · rebelliousness· disrespect· resentment · envy · sarcasm· fear · selfish ambition · greed· stubbornness· jealousy · unforgiveness· lust· worry Hidden Habits

Some habitual actions are often not recognized as harmful addictions because—13

· You are unaware that a negative way of responding has become habitual (arguing).· The world does not see your habit as negative (workaholism).· A seemingly good behavior is controlling your life, thus becoming a sin (rescuing others).Eccl 7:18

· compulsive arguing· compulsive organizing· compulsive collecting· compulsive perfectionism · compulsive competing· compulsive procrastination · compulsive credit charging· compulsive reading· compulsive cleaning· compulsive rescuing of others· compulsive entertainment· compulsive religious works· compulsive exercising· compulsive rituals· compulsive gambling· compulsive shopping· compulsive horoscope consulting· compulsive tardiness· compulsive internet usage· compulsive time wasting· compulsive indecision· compulsive TV viewing· compulsive messiness· compulsive workingHard Habits

Destructive habits create an unhealthy emotional climate and have the potential of damaging you and/or others.

1 Cor 6:19-20

· alcoholism/drug abuse · overcontrolling· anorexia/bulimia · profanity/verbal abuse · cheating· rage · codependency · self-abasement· gossip/slander · self-aggrandizement· immorality/vulgarity· self-mutilation· irresponsibility· sexual addiction/pornography

· lying · stealing · occult obsession · tobacco addiction· overeating· violence C. Boundary Markers Most of us become adept at justifying our behavior. So proficient are we at rationalizing that many undesirable habits remain hidden . . . even from ourselves! Perhaps you've been denying the truth by thinking, If it really isn't making waves, what's the matter with it. The Corinthians had as their own slogan, "Everything is permissible for me." However, Paul warns that although we are free from the condemnation of the law, we are accountable for habits that can be "out of balance" . . . habits that become out of control. Consider the telling question: "Does your habit have mastery over you?"14 1 Cor 6:12

"How do I know if I have a destructive habit or a hidden addiction that is not consistent with God's will?" Desire to be accountable before God, and take an honest appraisal of your life. Ask yourself if you have any habits or desires that would cause you to answer yes to the following questions.15 The Compulsive Checklist

— Are my thoughts consumed with it?— Is my time scheduled around it?— Could my health be harmed by it?— Does my guilt increase following it?— Are my finances affected by it?— Am I defensive when asked about it?— Are my relationships hurt by it?— Am I upset when I can't do it?Ps 139:23-24

CAUSES OF DESTRUCTIVE HABITS

Unless an activity we do on a regular basis moves from providing temporary pleasure to creating personal pain, we usually don't desire to alter our behavior. But if your life is now a "bumpy road," maybe you are ready to take responsibility for change. The first step on this journey is looking at what fuels negative habits.A. Misguided Choices Since one common element in all habits is some degree of satisfaction, activities that provide pleasure can act as a buffer between you and your deepest inner

feelings. Choosing to escape from painful emotions and circumstances, thus trying to avoid the realities of life, may start you on a road to ruin!16 Prov 14:12

Are you choosing to . . .

· escape from Anxiety?· escape from Worry?· escape from Guilt?· escape from Boredom?· escape from Depression?· escape from Insecurity?· escape from Stress?· escape from Responsibility?· escape from Feeling Controlled?· escape from Shame?· escape from Physical Pain? B. Misplaced Dependencies Your deepest longing is to have intimacy with God through a loving personal relationship with Him. God created each of us with this desire to seek Him because He knows that anything else will ultimately fail us! Uncontrolled habits often represent our own attempt to meet the God-given emotional needs for love, for significance and for security through unhealthy dependencies on people, things or activities.17 · Are you seeking to meet your inner need for unconditional love through sensual pleasure (overeating)?· Are you seeking to meet you inner need for significance through achievement (workaholism)?· Are you seeking to meet your inner need for security through another person (codependency)?Unfortunately, many of our own efforts to meet these inner needs have little or no resemblance to the provisions and promises of God! If you have become dependent on anything or anyone other than your heavenly Father . . . you can find freedom by seeking Him now!Jer 29:13-14

C. Misaligned Beliefs We lose the war with temptation when we prioritize pleasing ourselves over pleasing the Lord. The root cause of a self-defeating habit is failure to develop self-control as a result of wrong thinking.18 Wrong Beliefs: · "This makes me feel better and, besides, I deserve it."19 · "A lot of people do this—after all, no one is perfect."· "I really can't help it. This habit is caused by my past."20

· "I have tried to quit but continue to fail, so why even try?"· "I can control this anytime. I'll think about changing tomorrow."· "I don't want to try to quit and risk finding out I have no control."Jer 7:24

Right Beliefs: · "I want to take responsibility for my behavior."21 · "My deepest desire is to please God, not myself."· "I can overcome a bad habit with a good habit."· "I have the Spirit of Christ living in me to help me."· "I can yield to Christ's control through me."· "My new habit will be to reflect the character of Christ."Rom 6:11

STEPS TO SOLUTION

A. Key Verse to Memorize Phil 4:13

B. Key Passages to Read and Reread 1 Cor 6:9-20

Almost every child has played "tug-of-war" and has been pulled over the line to defeat. In the same way, adults who sincerely desire to please the Lord experience a heartbreaking "tug-of-war" with unwanted habits. Have you given up hope? Do you feel that the struggle is in vain? In this passage, we are reminded that "with Christ on your team" you can win the war for self-control.Remember Who You Are!

If you are overpowered by the pull of a habit, understand your identity in Jesus Christ. As a Christian, you are already "washed," "sanctified" and "justified" by the Spirit of Christ. As a child of God you have been given a precious gift—the power to live a holy life. It makes no sense to lose a war you can win!1 Cor 6:11-14

Realize That Christ Lives in You

Much of a habit's power to pull you over the line rests in your belief that you are "on your own" during times of temptation. Because of your guilt, you can feel that God is far away and His power is gone. However, if you are a Christian, you are never alone. You have "Christ in you" (Col 1:27) to win the victory through you.22 The Bible says we are "united" with Christ, that we are "one with him." This means that if we yield ourselves to be pulled down by a negative habit, we pull

down the name of Christ with us! This understanding can be a life changing motivator for you to reconsider your choices!1 Cor 6:15-18

Render Your Body for the Glory of God

Losing the struggle in "tug-of-war" can be the result of a strategic error. Were you thinking, I belong to myself, or I'm accountable only to me? The Bible says, "You are not your own; you were bought at a price," and that price was the blood of Jesus. Since you belong to the Lord, honor Him by letting go of your harmful habits and replacing them with godly habits.1 Cor 6:19-20

C. Success in Self-Control To have self-control you must first know what self-control is NOT. It is NOT "pulling yourself up by your own boot straps." It is NOT overcoming one bad habit, only to replace it with another bad habit. The essential quality of self-control is a restraint of desires that may pull you down so that you may achieve your goals.23 It is saying no to a negative habit so you can say yes to a positive goal. Self-control is a gift from God that empowers you to fulfill the will of God.Gal 5:22-24

Steps to Self-Control

· Start with a commitment to God.24 — Believe that God is good and just.25 — Believe that God wants only what is best for you.— Believe that God does not delight in punishing you.— Believe that God has the desire and power to help you.Personalize: Deut 32:4

· Separate yourself from sin.26 — Repent and confess that your habit is sin.— Realize that yielding to your habit makes you a slave to sin.— Review in your mind on a regular basis the negative consequences of your habit.— Read and memorize Ps 1.Personalize: Rom 6:1-2

· Set a new goal.27 — Make it your goal to know God.— Make it your goal to please God.— Make it your goal to depend on God.

— Make it your goal to learn more about God.Personalize: 2 Cor 5:9-10

· Stand on the truth.28 — Know that in Christ you are set free from the penalty of sin.— Know that in Christ you are set free from the power of sin.— Know that in Christ you are "dead to sin."— Know that you no longer have to be a slave to sin.Read Romans chapters 6, 7 and 8 and write down every verse in which Paul indicates that you are free from sin.Personalize: Rom 6:6

· Substitute God's thoughts for your thoughts.29 — When you are tempted by a habit, remember . . . 1 Cor 10:13

— When you think you are powerless over a habit, say . . . Phil 4:13

— When you think you've had the habit too long to change, claim . . . 2 Cor 5:17

— When you begin to rationalize that the habit is okay, admit . . . James 4:17

— When you think no one will know about the habit, understand . . . Heb 4:13

— When you have given in to a habit, realize . . . Ps 145:14

Personalize: Rom 12:1-2

· Surrender your will.30 — Acknowledge that you belong to God.— Acknowledge that God has authority over all your thoughts, words, desires, time, money and possessions.— Acknowledge that the decision to change is yours . . . you are making a choice!— Acknowledge that you have the actual presence of God's Spirit in you to help you make the right choice!Personalize: Rom 6:19

· Stay on track.31 — Avoid taking pride in the victory over your habit.— Avoid thinking you have control over what caused your habit.— Avoid thinking it will be okay to occasionally indulge the habit.— Avoid moving out from under God's grace into self-sufficiency.Personalize: Rom 5:1-2

D. Hitting the Bull's Eye Have you ever said to yourself, I'm not going to eat that chocolate pie . . . then all you can think about is chocolate pie! In the battle with temptation, you will shoot the arrow through your own foot if your thoughts are aimed downward. Don't dwell on the negative. Rather, focus on the positive. Set your thoughts high on God's character building truths, then with Christ's strength, you can hit the target every time.32 Missing the Target

· "I must quit smoking!"· "I'll never pick up a cigarette again."· "Christians look down on smokers."· "I will stop thinking about cigarettes."· "God is ashamed of me for smoking."· "God will punish me for smoking."Living under the "Law" never changes you. If you focus only on what you shouldn't do, you will be pulled more powerfully to do it.1 Cor 15:56

Hitting the Target with Positive Truth

Target #1 . . . God's purpose for me is to display Christ's character.Rom 8:29

· "Christ lives in me to conform me to His character."· "I want to be the best representative of Christ."· "I will yield to His control and do what is best for my body."Target #2 . . . God's priority for me is to change my thinking.Rom 12:2

· "Nothing is too hard for God. I know I can change in His strength."· "I will enjoy getting rid of my guilt and gaining self-control."· "I will replace my defeated thinking with positive promises of victory."Target #3 . . . God's plan for me is to rely on Christ's power to change me.Phil 4:13

· I can give Christ increasing control of my life in order to taper off gradually . . . —by carrying a limited number of cigarettes for each day along with a gradual cutback schedule—by limiting buying cigarettes to only certain days of the month—by buying only one pack at a time—by giving my cigarettes to a friend to keep so that I have to ask for one—by setting restrictions on when, where and around whom I can smoke (on the patio after a meal, when I take a walk around the block, not around loved ones)—by making myself accountable to someone who is willing to help—by memorizing 1 Cor 6:19-201 Cor 6:19-20

Although I don't feel I have the strength to quit smoking on my own, I have Christ's strength within me.· I can give Christ total control in my life in order to quit "cold turkey . . ." — by refusing to purchase cigarettes— by avoiding looking at cigarette ads—by choosing not to dwell on the "comfort" of smoking— by doing another preplanned activity when I desire a cigarette (especially something with my hands)— by finding a substitute for wanting something in my mouth (chewing gum, hard candy, ice or a toothpick)— by eliminating the activities that cause me to want to smoke— by memorizing Rom 14:21 and 1 Cor 6:121 Peter 1:13

Phil 4:8

"What is the truth about tobacco"33 Tobacco smoke contains more than 200 known poisons. Those who smoke two packs a day shorten their life expectancy by eight years.Tobacco . . . · is the most common cause of lung cancer· causes emphysema, making breathing very taxing, which in turn causes death · is a major cause of hardening of the arteries, which in turn causes strokes and most heart attacks· is a major contributor in mouth and throat cancers, which can disfigure a person for life· produces chemicals that erode the lining of the stomach, which in turn causes gastric ulcers· increases the risk of bladder cancer· produces carbon monoxide and retards the growth of a fetus in a mother who smokes, which also increases the risk of premature birth and infant death · is the leading cause of death in men

1 Cor 10:23

E. Dressed in the Robes of Christ The definition of habits hints at their ultimate value! Because habits reflect the underlying character of a person, good habits become the apparel you wear to reflect the character of Christ (see Rom 8:29). Begin today! Take off the tattered rags of sin and replace them with the beautiful robes of Christ.Gal 3:26-27

Put on the Habit of Faith

· Faith is developed through hearing God's Word.Rom 10:17

· Faith is strengthened by believing the promises of God.Rom 4:20

· Faith is displayed by living under authority. (Read Luke 7:1-10.)Put on the Habit of Goodness

· Goodness is developed by storing up what is good in your heart.Matt 12:33-35

· Goodness is strengthened by measuring everything you do by God's standard.Eph 5:8-9

· Goodness is displayed by acts of kindness and generosity to others.1 Tim 6:18

Put on the Habit of Knowledge

· Knowledge begins with a healthy fear of God and a recognition of the consequences of sin.Prov 1:7

· Knowledge is developed by studying God's Word.1 Tim 3:16-4:1

· Knowledge is strengthened by seeking God's will for your life.Col 1:9

· Knowledge is displayed by a willingness to accept discipline.Prov 12:1

Put on the Habit of Perseverance

· Perseverance is developed through trials and testing.James 1:2-3

· Perseverance is strengthened by keeping your eyes on Jesus.Heb 11:27

· Perseverance produces maturity.James 1:4

Put on the Habit of Godliness

· Godliness is developed by turning away from the pursuit of evil and worldly gain.1 Tim 6:8-11

· Godliness is strengthened through knowledge of God's truths.Titus 1:1-2

· Godliness is displayed through the power of Jesus living His life through you.2 Peter 1:3

Put on the Habit of Brotherly Kindness

· Brotherly kindness is developed by loving the brotherhood of believers.1 John 4:19

· Brotherly kindness is strengthened by honoring others above yourself.Rom 12:10

· Brotherly kindness is displayed by showing hospitality and sharing with others in need.Rom 12:13

Put on the Habit of Love

· Love is developed by recognizing that God first loved you.1 John 4:10

· Love is strengthened by obeying God's commands.John 14:15

· Love is displayed by loving your enemies.Matt 5:43-48

2 Peter 1:5-8

F. Harvesting Good Habits Hos 10:12

Many habits are the result of our childhood experiences. Family and friends have a powerful influence on us. But as we grow older, we can decide for ourselves the values and behaviors we want to cultivate. No longer a child, you do not have to be controlled by the attitudes and actions of others. You can choose to plant, cultivate and harvest good habits that are desirable and pleasing to God.1 Cor 13:11

· Sow the Seeds of Moral Sensitivity— Study the Scriptures daily so that you can know God's standards.— Write out the Ten Commandments and apply each one to your life (Ex 20:1-17).— Consider what it means to "have no other gods before me." — Memorize the Beatitudes and rehearse them in your mind (Matt 5:3-11).— Measure all your behavior with the Scriptural yardstick.Ps 119:11

· Sow the Seeds of Accountability — Be open to the truth when others criticize you.— Say with appreciation, "It takes courage to point out where a person needs to change. . . . Thank you for taking the risk."— Think about your negative attitudes and each day review their consequences.— Confess your failures to God, and ask forgiveness from those you have offended.— Daily or weekly talk with a friend who will help you "kick the habit."Prov 28:13

· Sow the Seeds of Gratefulness— Memorize Ps 100 and meditate on its message.— Acknowledge the gifts of God for which you can be grateful.— Keep a prayer journal, and give thanks for answered prayer.— Always express gratitude to those who are helpful to you.— Thank God for what He is teaching you through each trial.1 Thess 5:16-18

· Sow the Seeds of Forgiveness — Know that forgiving others is required to have the forgiveness of God.— Choose to forgive others even when you feel justified in your anger.— Remind yourself of the many times God forgives you.

— Read the story of Joseph for insights into the heart of forgiveness. (Genesis chapters 37-50. The key verse is Gen 50:20.)— Seek to reconcile broken relationships in person or by letter.Matt 6:14-15

· Sow the Seeds of Selflessness— Set a high standard for yourself, and expect less from others.— Ask God to shine a spotlight on your acts of selfishness.— Avoid talking about yourself or bragging about your endeavors.— Resist the urge to criticize or give unasked-for advice.— Perform an act of kindness toward someone else each day.Phil 2:3

· Sow the Seeds of Communion with God— Seek out time every day to be alone with God.— Acknowledge unpreventable noise and remove other distractions.— Slowly say in your heart, "Lord, I do love You."— Close your mind to invading thoughts, and focus on God's presence.— Be quiet in your spirit, and wait on God to reveal Himself to you.Ps 104:34

Sowing and Reaping

You can't sow a bad habit and reap a good character.

You can't sow lying and reap trustworthiness.

You can't sow negative words and reap positive relationships.

You can't sow unforgiveness and reap forgiveness.

You can't sow neglect of God and reap the peace of God.

—by June Hunt

Gal 6:7-8

NOTES

1. See Merriam-Webster Inc., Merriam-Webster's Dictionary of Basic English (Springfield, MA: Merriam-Webster, 2000).2. Merriam-Webster's Dictionary.3. Merriam-Webster's Dictionary.4. Merriam-Webster's Dictionary.5. Merriam-Webster's Dictionary.

6. Merriam-Webster's Dictionary.7. For more details, see W. E. Vine, Vine's Complete Expository Dictionary of Biblical Words, electronic ed. (Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 1996).8. Vine, Vine's Complete Expository Dictionary.9. Vine, Vine's Complete Expository Dictionary.10. Vine, Vine's Complete Expository Dictionary.11. Neil T. Anderson, A Way of Escape (Eugene, OR: Harvest House, 1994), 17, 107; Anabel Gillham, The Building Up & Tearing Down of Strongholds (Fort Worth, TX: Lifetime Guarantee Ministries, nd), 6.12. Gerald G. May, Addiction and Grace (San Francisco, CA: Harper & Row, 1988), 3-4.13. For this section see Archibald D. Hart, Healing Life's Hidden Addictions: Overcoming the Closet Compulsions that Waste Your Time and Control Your Life (Ann Arbor, MI: Vine, 1990), 3-4.14. Hart, Healing Life's Hidden Addictions, 5.15. Lawrence J. Crabb, Jr., "The Sin in Self-Discipline," Discipleship Journal, no. 44 (1988).16. Hart, Healing Life's Hidden Addictions, 5, 17-19.17. On the three God-given inner needs, see Lawrence J. Crabb, Jr., Understanding People: Deep Longings for Relationship, Ministry Resources Library (Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1987), 15-16; Robert S. McGee, The Search for Significance, 2 nd ed. (Houston, TX: Rapha, 1990), 27-30.18. William D. Backus, Finding the Freedom of Self-Control (Minneapolis, MN: Bethany House, 1987), 25-27.19. Backus, Finding the Freedom of Self-Control, 160.20. Backus, Finding the Freedom of Self-Control, 159.21. Backus, Finding the Freedom of Self-Control, 83.22. Erwin W. Lutzer, How to Say "No" to a Stubborn Habit: Even When You Feel LIke Saying "Yes" (Wheaton, IL: Victor, 1986), 112.23. Backus, Finding the Freedom of Self-Control, 36.24. Backus, Finding the Freedom of Self-Control, 153.25. Lutzer, How to Say "No" to a Stubborn Habit, 21-24.26. Backus, Finding the Freedom of Self-Control, 43-4; Lutzer, How to Say "No" to a Stubborn Habit, 48-49.27. Lutzer, How to Say "No" to a Stubborn Habit, 52-53 and 100-8.28. Anderson, A Way of Escape, 117-33.29. Lutzer, How to Say "No" to a Stubborn Habit, 76-77.30. Lutzer, How to Say "No" to a Stubborn Habit, 98-108.31. Lutzer, How to Say "No" to a Stubborn Habit, 131-40.32. Lutzer, How to Say "No" to a Stubborn Habit, 57-58, 76-84.33. For the following section see The World's Best Anatomical Charts: Diseases and Disorders (Skokie, IL: Anatomical Chart Company, 2000), 29. SELECTED BIBLIOGRAPHY

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