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White noise then sound of a traffic report then more white noise then a bit of a song then various songs a bit of the news, traffic report, adverts/jingles then the radio tunes into 500 Miles.DARIUS + MICK(singing along)I could walk 500 milesan I could walk 500 more just to be that man who walked a thousand miles to fall down at your doorThe pair laugh.DARIUSDamn, I love that song!MICKMe too.DARIUSI wanted it to be the songfor the first dance butMaddie said no. She wantedbloody one direction, canyou imagine.MICKYou said no, right?DARIUSCourse I did, not havingat my wedding.MICKNever. So what song did you settle on then?DARIUSWhat do you think?MICKTake That?DARIUSOf course.

MICKWouldnt be a proper wedding without a bit ofTake That.The pair laugh again. It is quiet for a moment then DARIUS fumbles about and suddenly begins to sing.DARIUSYou light, the skies, upabove me. Yeah.MICK laughs then joins in.MICK + DARIUSA star, so bright youblind me,Dont close your eyes,Don't fade awayDon't fade awayThe radio begins to turn again and the pair fade away. We go through the different radio stations and eventually stop on a traffic report.TRAFFIC CORESPONDENTTRAFFIC REPORTDADWell isnt that just typical.I told you we shouldnt travel during Rush Hour.MUMHow was I supposed to knowthere was gonna be an accident.DAD sighs loudly.KIDMum, Im hungry, when are we stopping for food?MUMAs soon as we can sweetie.KIDMy stomach real-ly hurts.Its gonna explode if I dont eat soon.MUMWell stop soon, I promise.DADThe next service station is20 miles away. At this rate,we wont be stopping anywhere soon.MUMYes. Thanks.KIDDid daddy say were not stopping?MUMNo, no dear. Of course we willstop, daddy was just exaggerating.DADDaddy really wasnt.MUMHe is sweetie dont worry we will stop soon.DADOf course, because apparentlymummys got superpowers and she is gonna make all this trafficdisappear so will we get therequicker.MUM(sighs)Ignore daddy he is just a bitupset by the traffic.KIDDo the cars make you saddaddy?DADNo, darling.MUMNo, only mad.KIDIs daddy angry at the cars?DADYes, darling Daddy is veryangry with the cars.KIDWhy do the cars make you angry daddy?MUMBecause, sweetie, daddy hasgot a very short temper andgets easily angry about a lotof things.DADThats only because mummy doesvery silly things sometimes thatmake daddy angry.MUMSometimes daddy just over reactsto situations without knowingwhat is actually going on.DADWell daddy, doesnt understandwhat uncle Mark on Friday whenshe was supposed to be at work.MUMMaybe its because mummy knowshow paranoid daddy gets when shesays she is going to see uncleMark.DAD(yells)SO YOU THINK ITS OKAY TO LIE!MUMBen!DADSorry, well stop as soon as wecan darling, I promise.Everything goes quiet.

KIDDad, I need the toilet.DAD exhales loudly.The radio begins to tune again and change channel. We go through the different radio stations and eventually stop on a random modern music.PASSENGERCould you turn that downplease?DRIVERSure, no problem.So where you heading then?PASSENGERJust going to visit the family.DRIVEROh that sounds nice. Thats nota local accent I hear is it?PASSENGERNahDRIVERSo where you from then?PASSENGERIm from Washington, over inthe states.DRIVERNever been there, and Ive beenall over Im telling ya. Whatsit like over there?PASSENGERIts alright, I suppose. It rainsa lot.DRIVERHaha, its not much better overhere Im afraid. To be honest Im surprised its not rainingright now.PASSANGERHahaAll goes quiet. Theres a popular song playing faintly on the radio.Could you turn this one up I like this song.The radio begins to tune again and begins flipping through channels, it stops on the football scores.SPORTS PRESENTERManchester United 1, Arsenal 2MANDamn. A phone begins to ring.MANOh what does she want now.MAN turns down the radio and answers the phone.MANHi honey, whats up?WOMANWhen are you gonna be home?MANI dont know. Theres a lotof traffic.WOMANOh, are you on the M5?MANYeah, everything is backed up.Could be a while.WOMANYeah I heard. Theres a huge pileup or something. What do you wantfor dinner?MANNo idea. Why dont you surpriseme.WOMANHurry back, and be careful.MANIll be as fast as I can.WOMANNot too fast though.MANHaha, okay, okay, well, Illtalk to you later honey.WOMANOkay, call me if theres anychange.MANWill do. Okay bye.WOMANDont be too late.MANYep, bye.WOMANSee you later.The phone cuts off.MANUgh, finally.Switches over the radio stations picks a song turns it up loud. Sings along. The radio begins to tune again tunes in to the end of a Take That song.MICKSo you nervous then?DARIUS(silent, takes a deepbreath)Yeah, (pause)but honestlyI cant wait.MICKYoure not about to go allsoft on me now, are you?DARIUSNo, no, no. Course not. Itsjust Im actually reallylooking forward to it. I havent seen her for the lasttwo weeks.MICKI know mate but you gottaenjoy this weekend.DARIUSI know, I know. And I will.MICKGood, because this weekendis gonna be fantastic. Itsyoure last one as a freeman.DARIUSYou still havent even toldme where we are going?MICKYoull have to wait untilwe get there.DARIUSYoure not taking me to theairport are you?MICKCourse not, do I look likeIm made of money?DARIUSCome on, where are we going?MICKStop asking, you find out!DARIUSI cant be doing with thesesurprises. You better not tie me to any lamp posts!MICKIm not making and promises!The pair laugh. The radio tunes out again tunes in to a random radio drama.MUMTheyre both fast asleep.DADHaha, I guess we tired themout.MUMYou know we really shouldntargue like that in front ofthem. Theyre gonna noticeeventually you know.DADI know, I know. I just dont think we should tellthem yet.MUMWe cant keep lying to themlike this. Kim is not a littlegirl anymore, shes gonna notice.DADWe will tell them just notyet. Theyre not ready.MUMYou mean youre not ready.DADYeah, okay, Im not ready.Im sorry Im not ready torip this family apart.MUMRip us apart? You kicked meout! Youre gonna rip usapart fine on your own.DADJust tell me what you weredoing on Friday?MUMOkay, I went to Marks totalk to him.DADJust to talk?MUMYes, just to talk. Im sorryfor needing to talk to someone about you cheating.DADYou can talk. I see how youtwo look at each other.MUMNothing happened between us.Dont try to blame this on meall of this is because of you.DADJust say it. Say it, divorce.MUMYes Im divorcing you. Are youhappy now. This is your faultanyway. Why did you do it?DADHonestly, right now I canteven remember.Radio begins to tune out again. Begins to tune back in to an new station. A phone begins to ring.MANOh, crap! (Answers Phone)Erm, helloFRIENDHey mate. I was just callingto ask whether youd finishedthat report off?MANYeah, its all done.FRIENDGreat, good because I need iton my desk by 9pm.MANTonight?! Thats in 15 minutes!How am I supposed to do that ?FRIENDJust email it to me.MANI cant. Im stuck in traffic.FRIENDWell you better find a way quick because if I dont getit tonight the whole case willbe ruined. Talk to you later.MANBut-!Phone call ends.Oh great, (sighs). Im gonnahave to call her.Hear a phone number being typed in. Calling tone.Someone answers.EX-GIRLFRIENDHello.MANGreat Kerry youre home. Itsme.KERRYJohn? I knew youd changeyour mind. I knew youdwant me back.JOHNYeah, yeah, of course. Butright now I really need youto do me a favour.KERRYAnything babes. Whatd youneed?JOHNI need you to go on my laptopand email something to Dave.Can you do that?KERRYYeah sure babes. Wheres yourlaptop?JOHNI think its on the table inthe kitchen.KERRYOkay Ill go a see.JOHNCome on, hurry.KERRYOkay.. got it.It says I need a password.JOHNYeah its Password with a capital P.KERRYHaha, thats clever.JOHNYeah sure, whatever.KERRYWhich file is it then?JOHNThe one on the desktop.KERRYYeah got it.JOHNNow just attach it to anemail and send it to Dave.KERRYOkay, erm, done.JOHNGood, thanks.KERRYBefore you go we need totalk about when are youcoming over next?JOHNSoon, soon, I promise.KERRYYeah really?JOHNYeah, yeah, I gotta gonow traffics moving.KERRYLove youJOHNYeah, bye.Phone call ends.Eugh. That was tedious.Radio begins to tune again.

but is switched off.

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