02 “Every flower is a soul blossoming in nature.”GÉRARD DE NERVAL, FRENCH WRITER AND POET

T o develop shame resilience amongstchildren, I created the first ever cur-riculum for India targeting children

between the ages of 6 and 14. The cur-riculum consists of over 40+ hours ofclass sessions with exercises to help stu-dents learn how to identify their own emo-tions and why repressing them is bad.These are a few frequently asked queriesthat I have answered...

If somebody teases me what should I do?Ignore them. People who tease you do sobecause they want to see you react andget disturbed. When you don’t show anyreaction, they don’t know what to do andgive up.If somebody uses bad language what shouldI do?The best way to handle thisis to show ignorance. Be-yond a stage when theycannot get you to react,they will stop. If we are well-wish-ers of others why dothey wish us ill? Thatis their nature andtemperament. Weshould stick to oursand get on with our lives.Sometimes we speak a lie unwillingly...For the good of others it may be

acceptable but it is best to be honest.What should I do if someone in my fami-ly uses foul language? We should either ig-nore them and not follow their exampleif they are our elders.How can I help my friend who feels he/shehas no friends? You can reassure them thatyou are their friend, and advise them thatthey should try and make friends withlike-minded children. When I was on my way to school I saw an

old woman trying to cross the road.She asked for help but I was

getting late... First, helpher to cross the road,

and then come toschool and tell yourteacher why youwere late. I am scared to takepermission from myparents for something.

How do I deal with it?It’s important to gain

the trust of your parents.As long as you know what

you want to do is not bad, they

will not stop you. If I feel sad when my parents favour mysiblings... Every child is equal in the eyesof parents. Let it pass.What is the difference between shame andguilt? Shame is what you feel when youare publicly humiliated for mistakes yourepeat. Guilt is what you feel when youfeel responsible for your failures.How can we bring a change in ourselves?If you are an extremely mischievouschild, you can decide to work hard andbe responsible. You have to accept yourmistakes first and then improve. What is the benefit of Unity? Teamworkmakes tasks easier, brings faster and bet-ter results, builds enthusiasm, disciplineand progress, builds relationships.How can we overcome fear? Understandwhat you are afraid of. Then confrontyour fears. If it is a dog, offer him a bis-cuit. If it is cycling, practice even if youfall. What is success? When we have a goalwe focus on the goal, practice and per-severe. What we achieve thereafter issuccess.

LEADERSHIP

Aditya Pattani, class XII, The Sri Ram School, New Delhi

Mahatma Gandhi’s name isindelible from the pages ofhistory because what hepreached is relevant even today.His virtues of non-violence and passiveresistance to win back India’s Independence from theBritish became a movement that can be emulated in thetimes we live. TTiimmeess NNIIEE looks at the life and beliefs ofthis peaceful revolutionary to handpick leadership les-sons for modern-day thought leaders...

HOW TO ACE IT LIKE BAPU

The one leadership quality that we learnt...

You are always incontrolMost want to blame every-thing on fate. GGaannddhhiibbeelliieevveedd yyoouu aarree iinn ccoonnttrroollaass yyoouu kknnooww hhooww ttoo rreeaaccttttoo ppeeooppllee aanndd eevveennttss.. Thatwas the most critical partthat affects the outcome.

Learn to say noGandhi once said, “A ‘No’ uttered from the deepest con-viction is better than a ‘Yes’ merely uttered to please, orworse to avoid trouble.” AA ggrreeaatt lleeaaddeerr kknnoowwss wwhheenn aannddhhooww ttoo ssaayy ‘‘NNoo’’.. IItt’’ss aallwwaayyss aa tteemmppttaattiioonn ttoo ddoo aa bbiitt ooffppeeooppllee pplleeaassiinngg,, bbuutt iitt’’ss bbeesstt nnoott ttoo sseeee wwhhaatt tthhee mmoobbwwaannttss aanndd ggiivvee iitt ttoo tthheemm bblliinnddllyy..

Build an honestbrand ‘Mahatma Gandhi’ is one of thegreatest brands in history. Ithas been enlightening and mov-ing people for centuries. That’ssimply because he built hisbrand on honesty. AAllll ssaaiidd aannddddoonnee,, yyoouu ccaann’’tt mmiissuussee tthhiissbbrraanndd ffoorreevveerr

Learn fromGANDHI Gentle persistence is better

than a brawlTo achieve a goal you need a goaland persistence. Gandhi believed inhard work, patience and learningfrom mistakes. HHiiss ppoolliiccyy ooff aahhiimmssaa((nnoonn-vviioolleennccee)) wwoorrkkeedd oonn aallll lleeaaddeerrss..

Believe in people’s good natureIf we believe that humanity comprises people withdifferent views, opinions, good and bad qualities, wewill be in a better position to handle people. Gandhionce said, ““YYoouu mmuusstt nnoott lloossee ffaaiitthh iinn hhuummaanniittyy..HHuummaanniittyy iiss aann oocceeaann,, iiff aa ffeeww ddrrooppss ooff tthheeoocceeaann aarree ddiirrttyy nnoott eevveerryytthhiinngg iinn iitt iiss ddiirrttyy..””

Be quick,be brief, be gonePersonal interactionswith Gandhi lasted not morethan a couple of minutes. However, inthat little time people felt they werethe singular person in the entireworld Gandhi would have loved tochat with. Gandhi wasn’t a greattalker. He was passable at best. HHee wwaassaann eexxcceeppttiioonnaall lliisstteenneerr ttoo tthhee ssppookkeennaanndd tthhee uunnssaaiidd.. UUnnlliikkee mmoosstt,, hhee lliisstteenneeddttoo uunnddeerrssttaanndd,, nnoott ttoo rreeppllyy..

Be yourselfHere comes a man who dress-

es in a simple loin cloth on aroyal visit to London’s BuckinghamPalace. He also joked that the Kingof England wore enough clothes

for the two of them! GGaannddhhiibbeelliieevveedd,, aanndd ssttoooodd ffoorr

hhiimmsseellff..

Humility never goesout of fashionGandhi once said, “It is unwise tobe too sure of one’s own wisdom.It is healthy to be reminded thatthe strongest might weaken andthe wisest might err.” Gandhibelieved it was fine to make amistake if you learn from itand get better. TThhiiss hhuummiilliittyymmeeaanntt ppeeooppllee ccoonnnneecctteedd wwiitthhhhiimm aass hhee hhaadd hhiiss ffeeeett oonn tthheeggrroouunndd..

Lead a simple andproductive lifeSimplicity is synonymous withsophistication. Gandhi led a sim-ple and frugal lifestyle. HHee

ddeevvootteedd mmoosstt ooff hhiissttiimmee aanndd

rreessoouurrcceess ttoosseellff-iimmpprroovvee-mmeenntt.. He want-

ed to gain interms of spiritual

advancement andless on material currency.

QUERY?These queries were

asked by students fromMona Convent School and Bal

Shiksha Niketan, Lucknow.Have a query? Reach out to

us at toinie175@gmail.com

Build your strength “The weak can never forgive.Forgiveness is the attribute ofthe strong”— One of the mostprominent qualities of a leaderis forgiveness. And thatbecomes your true strength.MMaahhaattmmaa GGaannddhhii aallwwaayyss aaddvvoo-ccaatteedd ffoorrggiivveenneessss,, aanndd tthhiiss iisswwhheerree hhiiss ttrruuee ssttrreennggtthh llaayy..

Be a leader — riseabove hate Gandhi’s life is no less than anIndian movie, a perfect exam-ple of how a simple man risesabove hate and emerges suc-

cessful. When it comes to strategy, Gandhijiwas a master executioner who always knewwhat he wanted and how to get there.Dr Shalika Banu, Teacher, Fathima MartriculationHr. Sec. School, Chennai

Make satya your motto It’s Gandhiji’s concept of truth-fulness that teaches me animportant lesson on leadership.Truthfulness came into his lifeat an early age and remainedwith him till his last breath. Amelya Savanna Carvalho, Dept of English, Greets Public School,Ernakulam

Leadermust have vision Gandhiji was a visionary, inthe sense he anticipated allthe calamities happeningaround the world. That is whyhe preached non-violence. He

was against racial segregation. Gandhiji’sviews on the approach of ahimsa, which isthe only way to ensure world peace, is some-thing any leader must follow. S Jayasree, Teacher, Lalaji Memorial Omega

International School

Value values; a keylesson When we find a dearth of valuesin today’s generation, it isGandhiji’s life experiences thatcome in handy. I am reminded that in a gentleway I can shake the world, I can stir the worldand I can have faith in the coming generation. Aleader must always see the future of the coun-try much ahead. I find this insight when Ibelieve Gandhi and the Gandhian way.Viral Vimal Shah, Department of English,

Bharatiya Vidya Bhavan's Public School, Jubilee

Hills, Hyderabad

Honesty is the bestpolicy Gandhiji was a man of greatinsight and vision. Itruly respect hisideas of truth,

compassion, forgiveness, cleanli-ness and stress on moulding charac-ter. These qualities are important.Padmaja Limaye, teacher, Fr Agnel

School, Navi Mumbai

Courage is what ittakes His love for discipline, uniqueleadership ability, strong willto drive his point across – areindeed qualities that everyleader must possess. Hisunmatched forbearance and

capabilities inspire one and all, across theglobe. He has shown the world what truecourage and compassion mean. He stoodupright with his morals which serves as a les-son for each and everyone. Jennifer Mecwan, educationist, Mumbai

Inclusiveness shouldbe the mantra Gandhi is very modern in histhinking and advocated inclu-siveness decades ago. It is

wrong to considerhim just as the brand ambassadorof non-violence. He wanted tobuild a non-violent and inclusive

society. Such a society is multi-cultur-al and includes many cultures and religions.His thoughts on Sarvodaya (welfare of all) arerelevant even today. Dr Wooday P Krishna, president, Gandhi Smaraka

Nidhi, Bengaluru

Leaders need to beinspiringI look up to Mahatma Gandhias a leader because he madean impact on so many millionsof people. Like him, I too wantto make an impact by helping

others in whatever small way I can. Rachna Ammunje Nayak, class IX, InnisfreeHouse School, Bengaluru

Being human andbeing gentleI admire Gandhiji for his lovefor the country. Gandhijibelieved that war doesn’tsolve problems but worsensthem. What inspired me arehis words, “In a gentle way you can shakethe world”. Bhoomika N H, class X, St Claret School,

Bengaluru

Always be helpful Gandhi’s idea of

satyagraha, orpassive resist-

ance to theoppressor, was a path-breaking movement in those days.Ann Maria Thomas, class X, Bhavan’sRajaji Vidyashram, Chennai

FAQS ONGENERAL ISSUES

PEER Counsellor

We focus on the goal, thenpractice & persevere. When we

achieve our goal that is success.

Sonal Srivastava: In theIndian context, the term‘secularism’ has a verydifferent connotationcompared to Europeancountries, isn’t it? ■ Swami Shrihariprasad:How did secularism comeabout in the west? Educationwas confined to the priestlyclass, so anybody who was ed-ucated was from the priestlyclass. So for a long time, inEngland, for some time inFrance, cardinals were min-isters. So people thought reli-gion and state should be sep-arated. Many people talkabout banning of scarves inFrance, but what they don’tunderstand is — in France,they don’t even allow cruci-fixes in classrooms. No sym-

bols of religion means no sym-bols. One’s religion should bein his heart. One can carry one’sreligion in symbols around

one’s neck, but they shouldn’tuse public space for all this.

The best way to beat sectar-ianism is to know that the oth-er person is like you. The oth-er person is also doing the samethings that you are doing, butin a different way. God loveseveryone; nobody is ever aban-doned by God. ■

Swami Shrihariprasad isfounder of Vishnu Mohan

Foundation Chennai

A man dies and goes to hell.There he finds that there is adifferent hell for each country.He goes to the German helland finds that people are firstput in an electric chairand then they aremade to lie on a bedof nails. After that thedevil comes and beats them.The man doesn’t like it, so hechecks out the hells of othercountries. All are the same.Then he comes to the Indianhell. There is a long queue ofpeople. He comes to know thatthe process here is the same asothers but the electric chairdoes not work and someonehas stolen all the nails. Thedevil is a former governmentservant, so he just comes in,signs the attendance register

and then goes…!

http://www.speakingtree.in

Shweta Jain

A lot of people haveexpressed to methat when they

were moving towards theirsoul purpose, a lot of peo-ple began disappearingfrom their life! It left themwondering if they were onthe right path. This hap-pens because when weraise our vibrations andalign ourselves with thosewith higher vibrations,then others who aren’t

with us in that journey orwho aren’t enriching ourlives, start moving out andwe start meeting peoplethat enhance our journey.

Love for instance is thehighest frequency that wecan vibrate at. If we canmaintain ourselves at that‘high vibe’ then nothing likeit as love brings happiness,joy, gratitude, and magic.But we hang around withpeople who drain our ener-gies and not lift us up.

Often they are closefriends, from our social cir-cle and relatives. We are soused to their company, wedon’t want to break them.But the beauty is, as soon asyou raise yourself to thenext level, any relationshipthat’s not serving you, willfinish effortlessly! If a part-ner or an intimate ac-quaintance is at a lower vi-brational frequency whileyou have moved up, thenyou can sustain the rela-tionship with a higher lev-el of awareness. ■

RAISE YOUR VIBRATIONS

The other person isalso doing the same

things that you aredoing, but in a different way

‘DIVINE LOVE IS WONDERFUL’POPULAR HELL

SACREDSPACE

One World

All are in the One, andthe One is in all. This is

what the True Guru has shown me.

Japji SSahib✥

Between man and man,man and tree, tree andbird, and bush and field,

there is a kind of family tie over there

in the village.D VV KKrishna SSastri

✥It is because one

antelope will blow thedust from the other’s

eye that two antelopeswalk together.Akan PProverb

✥If everyone helps tohold up the sky, then

one person does not become tired.Askhari JJ HHodari

GANDHIGIRI AND ME