GENDERED COMMUNICATION GENDERED COMMUNICATION PRACTICESPRACTICES

“Communication between men and women can be like cross cultural communication, prey to a clash of

conversational styles” Deborah Tannen (1990)

Caveats

• “Gender” and “Sex” are not the same.

• Gender is not a yes/no question.

• Issues of the “margins”

Freudian Identification Theory

• Identification with same-sex parent model

– Male development stems from defensive identification (fear of retaliation from a powerful figure

– Female development stems from the anaclitic (Fear of Loss)

• Freud’s theories are fraught with sexist, shoddy methodology

Social Interaction Theories

• Gender is shaped through our interactions with others.

• Focus on a mechanism by which individuals acquire gender identity– Socialization – the process by which children

acquire the values and behaviors seen as appropriate for their gender. (More in labs)

• Examples of S.I.T. include Social Learning Theory and Cognitive Development Theories

Social Learning Theory

Same-sex (Mother and daughter) models at home and in the media provide reinforcement for gender-appropriate behaviors.

Cognitive Development Theory

A child’s concept of gender develops in stages until five or six years of age.

Gender constancy is attained at a specific point during developments, when this occurs, the child’s role shifts from one of passive receiver of gender to one of active seeker of reinforcement.

Identification with their same sex parent

Social Role Theories• Social Role Theory – a set of behavior patterns that

define the expected behavior for individuals in a given position or status.

– Symbolic interaction – individuals develop their view of self from their perception of the expectations of significant others.

– Expectations of appropriate behavior are communicated by feedback.

Summation of Social Interaction Theories of Gender

• Social Learning Theory• Cognitive Developmental Theory• Social Role Theory

Moral Voices Theory

• Early social environment is experienced differently by male and female children.

• Female identity formations takes place in the context of an ongoing relationship with their mothers

• Males must separate psychologically from their mothers in order to define themselves as masculine.

Moral Voices Theory• Male gender identity is threatened by intimacy while

female gender identity is threatened through separation.

• Men have problems with relationships, women have troubles with differentiation.

• Gilligan has been critiqued for advocating a polarized approach to gender: males follow an ethic of justice and women follow an ethic of care. Gilligan argues that they are not mutually exclusive.

Woman’s SpeechWoman’s Speech

• For Most Women Communication is:– to establish and maintain relationships– conversation is for sharing and learning about

others– Talk is the essence of relationships

Characteristics of Women’s Speech

• Equality• Showing Support• Relationship• Conversational Maintenance• Inclusivity• Tentativeness

MEN’S SPEECHMEN’S SPEECH

General Tendencies

• Goal of talk is exerting control, preserving independence and enhancing status.

• Conversation is the arena for proving oneself and negotiating prestige

Characteristics of Male Speech

– Show Knowledge, Skill, and Ability– Advice– Instrumentality– Conversational Dominance– Absolute, Assertive Talk– Abstract Talk– Less Responsive

Talking about Troubles• Woman disappointed in not getting job

– Man says, “You shouldn’t feel bad. Lots of people don’t get jobs they want” • She thinks, he belittles her experience• He thinks, he is showing respect by bolstering her

independence• Man disappointed is not getting job

– Woman says, “Are you okay” What’s bothering you?”• He thinks this points out his vulnerability• She probes to show she cares

RELATIONSHIP TALK

• WOMEN– It’s going fine if there is talk– Talk is a process to sustain relationship– Talk is a way to show closeness– “We need to talk,” to affirm our caring

• MEN– It’s going fine if there is no need to talk– Talk is to solve problems– Talk indicate a problem– Duck when she says, “we need to talk”

THE ENDBased on Julia Wood’s book Gendered Lives