Fulton Psychological Group Successful Communication with your Children

Fulton Psychological Group

Successful Successful Communication with Communication with

your Childrenyour Children


Fulton Psychological GroupFulton Psychological Group

Individual TherapyIndividual Therapy Group TherapyGroup Therapy Parent TrainingParent Training Family TherapyFamily Therapy Couples TherapyCouples Therapy Psychological TestingPsychological Testing PsychiatryPsychiatry


Methods of Methods of CommunicationCommunication

TalkingTalking Body languageBody language ToneTone TextingTexting EmailingEmailing FacebookFacebook Sending picturesSending pictures Writing notesWriting notes ActionsActions


Creating OpportunitiesCreating Opportunities

Create direct and indirect methodsCreate direct and indirect methods Unplug you and your children while Unplug you and your children while

traveling, doing family activities and traveling, doing family activities and around mealsaround meals

Mealtime (don’t lecture, scold, Mealtime (don’t lecture, scold, reprimand)reprimand)

Have your children do more with you Have your children do more with you (cook, household projects)(cook, household projects)

Do fun things with your childrenDo fun things with your children


Creating the Right Creating the Right EnvironmentEnvironment

Express your care and give positive Express your care and give positive feedbackfeedback

Toleration helps, too much creates bad Toleration helps, too much creates bad habitshabits

Model communication by talking to your Model communication by talking to your children about yourselfchildren about yourself

Communicate through your actions: take an Communicate through your actions: take an interest in their activities, be involvedinterest in their activities, be involved

Ask open ended or specific questionsAsk open ended or specific questions Sandwich critical feedbackSandwich critical feedback


Teach Communication Teach Communication SkillsSkills

Active listen, respond to both content and Active listen, respond to both content and emotionsemotions

Respond to both manifest and latent contentRespond to both manifest and latent content Give feedbackGive feedback Help establish feelings vocabularyHelp establish feelings vocabulary Do the “try that again” methodDo the “try that again” method Model good communicationModel good communication

Eye contactEye contact Body languageBody language ToneTone Being clearBeing clear


Watch the ToneWatch the Tone

Be empathic, show you understand their Be empathic, show you understand their plightplight

Avoid a negative or hostile toneAvoid a negative or hostile tone Be direct and don’t engage in the dramaBe direct and don’t engage in the drama Avoid getting too loud or too emphaticAvoid getting too loud or too emphatic Don’t be dismissive, take your children Don’t be dismissive, take your children

serious (their points are serious to serious (their points are serious to them)them)


Parenting Styles and Parenting Styles and CommunicationCommunication

AuthoritarianAuthoritarian Rigid, demands obedience, non-Rigid, demands obedience, non-

communicativecommunicative AuthoritativeAuthoritative

Set rules, communicates reasoning, Set rules, communicates reasoning, affectionateaffectionate

Permissive (involved vs. uninvolved)Permissive (involved vs. uninvolved) Few boundaries, little structure, may or Few boundaries, little structure, may or

may not communicate or be involvedmay not communicate or be involved


Managing vs. RelatingManaging vs. Relating

Two general Two general categories of categories of parentingparenting

We spend most of We spend most of our time managingour time managing

Need to set up Need to set up time for relatingtime for relating

Compartmentalize Compartmentalize managing your managing your childrenchildren


Don’t Tell, AskDon’t Tell, Ask

When your children come to you with a When your children come to you with a problem, ask how they would approach itproblem, ask how they would approach it

When you see your children making a When you see your children making a mistake, ask what the outcomes could bemistake, ask what the outcomes could be

Ask your children to evaluate themselvesAsk your children to evaluate themselves Implement some of their ideasImplement some of their ideas Thinking aloud helps model problem Thinking aloud helps model problem

solvingsolving


Dealing with High Dealing with High ConflictConflict

Don’t react negatively to negative feelingsDon’t react negatively to negative feelings Be aware of your hot buttonsBe aware of your hot buttons Empathize and let them express Empathize and let them express

themselvesthemselves State problem and don’t get side trackedState problem and don’t get side tracked Solicit solutions, discuss pros and cons Solicit solutions, discuss pros and cons

and come up with a viable solutionand come up with a viable solution Avoid engaging, escalatingAvoid engaging, escalating Take a break if necessaryTake a break if necessary


Communicating LoveCommunicating Love

Your children need to hear it expressedYour children need to hear it expressed Many ways to communicate love, Many ways to communicate love,

affectionaffection Five love languages: Five love languages:

Words of AffirmationWords of Affirmation Quality TimeQuality Time Receiving GiftsReceiving Gifts Acts of ServiceActs of Service Physical TouchPhysical Touch


Things to AvoidThings to Avoid

Being overly critical (they need your Being overly critical (they need your acceptance)acceptance)

Interrogations and yes & no questionsInterrogations and yes & no questions Asking self incriminating questions Asking self incriminating questions

when you know the answerwhen you know the answer Repeating yourselfRepeating yourself Using too many wordsUsing too many words Talking when tempers are flaringTalking when tempers are flaring

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Fulton Psychological Group Successful Communication with your Children