Feedback from The Great Gatsby style analysis essays:

Thesis statements·HOW do we know Nick's opinion? Through imagery? diction? tone?

·Don't use FIRST person. I know it is what you think. You wrote it. The "I" is implied.

·TECHNICALLY... Fitzgerald is using the language to convey Nick's opinion.

·NOT OKAY TO SAY..."Nick uses language to communicate his opinion..."

·IT IS OKAY TO SAY..."Nick's opinion is revealed through the words and images...""Diction and imagery convey Nick's opinion that the..."

Other things to keep in mind:

·Parenthetical citations with PAGE NUMBERS FROM THE NOVEL (not the prompt handout) are required.·Thus, a WORKS CITED PAGE is required.·Embed quotes.

FORMATTING: UGH! Headings are yuck. Extra spaces are, like, why? Overall, the formatting makes me want to cry.

·Use correct formatting. Drajem BLOG+Your effort

= Correct MLA formatting

Book (5.5.2)Author's Last Name, First Name Middle Name. Title of Book. City of

Publication: Publisher's Name, Year of Publication. Medium of

Publication.

implicit

im·plic·it–adjective 1. implied, rather than expressly stated

explicitex·plic·it–adjective 1. fully and clearly expressed or demonstrated; leaving nothing merely implied; unequivocal:

IMPROVE YOUR BODY PARAGRAPHS1. Pick apart the language. Get in there.

Often students will write something like "there is strong word choice (or imagery) in the passage." Where? What words? Be specific.

2. Describe how the language is working.Often students leave this part out. But remember: You need to mention the connotative value of the diction you

identify, or explain the figurative value of the words (for example, if it's a metaphor, what's the comparison?), or identify what senses are being appealed to (can we picture it? smell it? taste it?). 3. Link your CD back to the topic sentence and

the thesis statement. Often students will write something like "this shows Nick's opinion." How does it show that? Explain.

(P.S. I know. You can't fool me. Don't try. If you're not sure, don't write it.)

Strong example--concrete details with commentary

The diction used in this passage shows Nick's recognition of Gatsby's obsession with Daisy and his extreme efforts to impress her. The words “feudal silhouette” and “big postern” describe Gatsby's house in terms of a castle. Nick describes the sounds he hears as “enchanting murmurs,” suggesting a medieval story of some kind. Just like a king, Gatsby has so much clothing of all types that he needs not just one, but two “hulking” cabinets. Nick sees Gatsby as a king who has everything, using what he owns to impress Daisy. All these words create an image of someone who always wants the flashiest belongings to attract attention. However, the diction here also communicates Nick's understanding that this is not reality, it is a fairy tale. Through the use of these words, it becomes clear that Nick is supremely aware of the lengths Gatsby is willing to go in order to create a world for Daisy that does not exist.

Conclusion: How does the passage (& Nick's opinion) relate to themes of novel???

From our seminar discussion:

Is this an inspirational tale? Are we inspired by the Buchanans, the Valley of Ashes, and Gatsby/his parties?

What might God be critical of in terms of the behavior of some of Buchanans, those who created the Valley of Ashes, and Gatsby/ those who attend his parties?

What do we learn about the American Dream from this introduction to the Buchanans, the Valley of Ashes, and Gatsby/his parties?

As a narrator Nick Carraway cannot conceal his opinions of and attitudes toward the other people/characters he interacts with as he tells his story. His initial description of Tom Buchanan in The Great Gatsby is evidence of this. This quality of Carraway’s narration draws readers into the story and gives birth to their own opinions of the characters and perhaps a sense of what each of the characters represents on a larger scale. Maybe readers are not just supposed to see that the narrator has an unfavorable opinion of Tom; ultimately, maybe they are also supposed to form an opinion about what Tom represents in America. Perhaps through the eyes of this narrator readers should see what Fitzgerald hoped to embody in characters like Tom, and that his narrator is his means of holding a mirror up to America to expose it flaws and imperfections as well as its greatness.

TO DO:

·Trade essays and have another PROOFREADING·See me with specific questions and/or areas of concern·Work on your revision checklist·SUBMIT!!! to Turnitin.com