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GRAFTON U3A FEBRUARY 2018 PAGE 1
JABBER JOURNAL GRAFTON U3A INC. (UNIVERSITY OF THE THIRD AGE)
PO Box 688 Grafton NSW 2460
www.grafton.u3anet.org.au
“Sharing our knowledge, skills and experience in a friendly convivial way”
FEBRUARY 2018
FEBRUARY JABBERFEST
JUDY MCMONAGLE FUNDRAISER AND QUILT WRANGLER
FOR
DR CATHERINE HAMLIN AC AND ADDIS ABABA FISTULA HOSPITAL ETHIOPIA
NEW LIFE CHURCH CENTRE - ARTHUR STREET GRAFTON 10.00AM – 12 FEBRUARY 2018
Members may recall George Flynn, a Grafton pharmacist, talking to us about the wonderful work of Drs.
Reginald and Catherine Hamlin some years ago. This couple were pioneers in performing surgery on
women suffering obstetric fistula. They established the Fistula Hospital in1974 specifically for women
with childbirth injuries. These women would come, destitute, in nothing but their urine-soaked clothes,
having endured labour for 5-6 days, often barefoot and cast out by their relatives. This hospital was
their only hope; therefore, all care treatment and surgery was completely free. As well, the Hamlins
established the Hamlin College of Midwives where students undergo four years of training before
receiving their BSc. Degree in Midwifery.
Our guest presenter, Judy McMonagle – one of ten children, and a
Gold Coast girl, read about Dr. Hamlin’s work and some ten years
ago began fundraising for the cause in addition to making quilts.
Following establishment of the Midwifery College Judy decided
to gift a quilt to each graduate. Since the first graduation seven
years ago, each of the 150 graduates has received a handmade
quilt. Judy will tell you herself how this idea has snowballed and
developed and about her nine visits to Ethiopia. Dr Catherine
Hamlin was recently announced as 2018 NSW Senior of the Year and has also has had a new Sydney
ferry named after her. Earlier in January, she turned 94. Mary Lou Brown
GRAFTON U3A FEBRUARY 2018 PAGE 2
COURSES/INTEREST GROUPS UPDATE For all afternoon groups in the U3A Rooms, Dougherty House.
We now have a very noisy ballet studio thumping and bumping on the floor above usually commencing between
3.00 and 3.30pm on school afternoons. I am therefore advising all group leaders to start their groups at about
1.00 pm, since it is almost impossible to concentrate when the noise starts. Please check with your group leaders
re starting times in the afternoon.
Morning groups are not so seriously affected, since these groups usually run during school hours.
Armchair Travel The next Armchair Travel group will be held on Tuesday 27 February at 1.00 – 3.00pm. Alysan
Pender will be talking about her recent travels to The Netherlands, Belgium, Luxembourg and Paris, all lovely
destinations. For enquiries contact Magda Mussared, phone 66449309.
Friday Morning Art History group will resume on Friday, 16th February, continuing with the course A History
of Impressionism, Monet to Van Gogh, which was commenced late in 2017. It will be held weekly, from 10.00 am
to 12.00 - coordinator yet to be determined. All enquiries to Alysan Pender at this stage, phone 66445397. All
welcome.
Several groups have had a slight change to times or days as follows:
Book Discussion will now meet on the 3rd Monday of the month as usual but from 1.00pm – 3.00pm.
Creative Writing will now be held on the 1st and 3rd Tuesday afternoons of the month, from 1.30 to 4.00 pm.
All newcomers welcome. Enquiries to Dorothy Hillis, ph. 66427427.
Chess will now be held on Thursday afternoons from 1.00 to 3.00 pm, 2 afternoons per month, the 2nd & 4th
Thursdays. Stan Mussared continues as coordinator. Newcomers welcome. Enquiries to Stan on 66449309.
Unsolved Mysteries will continue with leader Maree Burrows, but has changed to the 3rd Thursday of the
month, at the earlier time of 1.00 to 3.00 pm. Enquiries to Maree on 66421640.
We also have some NEW COURSES to announce!! We will be offering a Beginners Ukulele Group with tutor
Leonie Hayes. The classes will be held two afternoons per month, on the 1st and 3rd Wednesday afternoon, from
2.30 to 3.30 pm, if there is sufficient interest. We will be taking Expressions of Interest for this group at the
February Jabberfest hopefully commencing on Wednesday 21February. The regular Ukulele Group will
continue to be held on the 1st & 3rd Wednesday afternoons, from 1.00 to 2.30 pm (note the new time). Enquiries
to Leonie on 66432211, or Alysan Pender on 66445397.
Leonie has also offered to start a new Beginners Guitar Group, to be held on 2nd & 4th Wednesday afternoons,
from 2.30 to 3.30 pm, if there is sufficient interest. Expressions of Interest for this group will also be taken at the
February Jabberfest, and the group will hopefully commence on Wednesday, 14th February. The regular Guitar
Group will continue to be held on 2nd & 4th Wednesday afternoons, too, from 1.00 to 2.30 pm (note the new
time). Enquiries to Leonie on 66432211 or Alysan Pender on 66445397.
Woodwork for Women will also be offered early in the year, with tutor Kevin Watkins, supported by other
members of the Mens' Shed. The course will run at the Mens' Shed for 6 or 7 weeks on Tuesday mornings from
9.00 am to 12.00, commencing on Tuesday 13 February, if there is sufficient interest. Expressions of Interest for
this group will also be taken at February Jabberfest. Enquiries to Kevin Watkins 66445518 or Alysan Pender
66445397.
If you have any other enquiries about other groups, please contact the group leader directly. Alysan Pender
Computing News - The Computer Section is starting off the New Year with an offering of two programs. The
long-established Computer Group is for people with an interest in both Computer and Tablet Programs and
covers a wide range of topics. This Group will commence on Friday 16 February. Further information contact
Carole Cairns or Tom Dennis.
If, by chance you received a Christmas Gift of an iPad/Tablet and you are now concerned about what to do with
it; see Don McLeod or David Abrahams. A class to assist you will commence on 23 February.
Please note a change in start times for both classes that will now run from 1.00pm – 3.00pm. Tom Dennis
GRAFTON U3A FEBRUARY 2018 PAGE 3
UnsolvedMysteries–Seenoteaboverechangeddate/timeformeetings.Pleasenoteourfirstmeetingforthe
Newyearwillbe16February.Wehavemanagedtocomeupwithavastrangeofsubjectsfordiscussionandthe
inputfromparticipantsisgreat,meaningweoftendriftawayfromthestatedsubjectandendupwithavery
enjoyableafternoon.WehavecaughtupwithfamousmysteriesliketheLochNessmonster–BermudaTriangle
–SpontaneousCombustionandheapsmore.Wechoosetoavoidsubjectsemphasisingdeath/murder/cruelty
andstaywithsubjectswhichareinterestingwithoutbeingdepressing.Anyoneiswelcometojoin.Pleasering
meon66421640forfurtherdetails.BesttocallinFebruaryasIwillbeawayformostofJanuary.MareeBurrows
PRESIDENT’S LETTER….Dear Members It is hard to believe that we are starting a new year and one wonders what happened
to 2017. The last year has seen many changes for U3A with our move to the New Life
Church Centre, which has thankfully proved to be a better location than the Grafton
Community Centre.
The additional space at the U3A rooms has proved to be a bonus although we are still
trying to sort out the problem with noise from what sounds like a herd of elephants
overhead with the location of the Dance Academy in the rooms above us.
Mary-Lu has lined up some great speakers for the Jabberfests in 2018 so we look
forward to seeing you all this year. If you have never been to any of our small groups, I would encourage you to
join as there is a wide variety available ranging from Table Tennis to Chess to History groups. Please do
remember though that people joining any of the small groups must also be paid up members of U3A.
If you have any problems or queries please contact either myself, Carole Cairns or Bruce Carle.
I would like to wish everyone a happy and healthy New Year in 2018.
David Thompson 6644 77
MORNING TEA VOLUNTEERS NEEDED The beginning of a new year is upon us and once again I am seeking volunteers to assist with the morning tea. I
am hopeful that several of the stalwarts will put their hands up again and it would be pleasing to welcome some
new faces as well. There will be a sheet at February Jabberfest where you can leave your name and phone
number, or you can ring me on 6644 5617. Thanks. Mary Lou Brown.
SENIORS FESTIVAL 2018 DEBATE – U3A TEAM NOMINATIONS In association with Seniors Festival 2018, Grafton Library is organizing a “debate” to be held in the Grafton
Library Meeting Room. The thought is to invite seniors in the community to a live debate between a Seniors team
and a younger team of high school students. The Seniors Festival runs from 4 – 15 April 2018 focusing on the
theme “let’s do more together”, which ties in well with an intergenerational debate. The aim is to generate
healthy, respectful conversation in a debate setting. Nominations are sought from at least three U3A members
to participate in the debate on 12 April 2018 against a team from Clarence Valley Anglican School. If interested,
please contact Bruce Carle at Jabberfest or telephone 0409225536.
2018 U3A NETWORK NSW CONFERENCE - CANBERRA ACT – 11 – 13 APRIL 2018
The above Conference, hosted by ACT U3A, will be hosted across two venues in Belconnen ACT – the University
of Canberra and the Premier Hotel and Apartments. Further information will be provided in next month’s
journal. In the meantime, it is suggested that accommodation be booked if required. The Premier Hotel and
Apartments (which will be the venue for sessions on Wednesday and Friday) are offering special rates as follows.
Call the hotel on 1800 672 076 from 7.00am to 11pm 7 days a week. Quote Block Code GB209 to access the rates
Queen or Twin Room $135 pn. Triple Room $152 pn. Exec King Room $156 pn. 2 Bed Apartment $237 pn.
EDITOR CONTACT
Contributions to the Jabber Journal are always welcome. We reserve the right to edit or refuse material
submitted for publication. Closing date for the March 2018 edition is Monday 26 February 2018
Editor Dennis Kelly [email protected]
GRAFTON U3A FEBRUARY 2018 PAGE 4
THE WORLD ACCORDING TO STUDENT BLOOPERS – Part 2
By Richard Lederer One of the fringe benefits of being an English or History teacher is receiving the occasional jewel of a student blooper in an
essay. I have pasted together the following “history” of the world from certifiably genuine student bloopers collected by teachers
throughout the Unites States, from eighth grade through college level. Read carefully and you will learn a lot.
In the Olympic Games, Greeks ran races, jumped, hurled the biscuits and threw the java. The reward to the victor
was a coral wreath. The government of Athen was democratic because the people took the law into their own
hands. There were no wars in Greece as the mountains were so high that they couldn’t climb over to see what
their neighbours were doing. When they faught the Parisians, the Greeks were outnumbered because the
Parisians had more men. Eventually the Ramons conquered the Greeks. History called people Romans because
they never stayed in one place very long. At Roman banquets, the guests wore garlic in their hair. Julius Caesar
extinguished himself on the battlefields of Gaul. The Ides of March killed him because they thought he was going
to be made king. Nero was a cruel tyranny who would torture his poor subjects by playing the fiddle to them.
Then came the Middle Ages. King Alfred conquered the Dames, King Arthur lived in the age of Shivery, King
Harlod mustarded his troops before the Battle of Hastings, Joan of Arc was canonized by George Bernard Shaw
and the victims of the Black Death grew boobs on their necks. Finally, the Magna Carta provided that no free man
should be hanged twice for the same offense. In Midevil times most of the people wee alliterate. The greatest
writer of the time was Chaucer, who wrote many poems and verse and also wrote literature. Another tale tells
of William tell, who shot an arrow through an apple while standing on his son’s head.
The Renaissance was an age in which more individuals felt the value of their human being. Martin Luther was
nailed to the church door at Wittenberg for selling papal indulgences. He died a horrible death, being
excommunicated by a bull. It was the painter Donatello’s interest in the female nude that made him the father of
the renaissance. It was an age of great inventions and discoveries. Gutenberg invested the Bible. Sir Walter
Raleigh is a historical figure because he invented cigarettes. Another important invention was the circulation of
blood. Sir Francis circumcised the world with a 100-foot clipper.
The government of England was a limited mockery. Henry VIII found walking difficult because had an abbess on
his knee. Queen Elizabeth was the “Virgin Queen”. As a queen, she was a success. When Elizabeth exposed herself
before her troops, they all shouted “hurrah”. Then her navy went out and defeated the Spanish Armadillo. The
greatest writer of the Renaissance was William Shakespeare. Shakespear never made much money and is famous
only because of his plays. He lived in Windsor with his merry wives, writing tragedies, comedies and errors. In
one of Shakespeare’s famous plays, Hamlet rations out his situation by relieving himself in a long soliloquy. In
another lady Macbeth tries to convince Macbeth to kill the king by attacking his manhood. Romeo and Juliet are
an example of an heroic couplet. Writing at the same time as Shakespear was Miquel Cervantes. He wrote
“Donkey hote”. The next great author was John Milton. Milton wrote “Paradise Lost”. Then his wife dies and he
wrote “Paradise Regained”.
During the Renaissance America began. Christopher Columbus was a great navigator who discovered America
while cursing about the Atlantic. His ships were called the Nina, the Pinta and the Santa Fe. Later the pilgrims
crossed the ocean and that was called the Pilgrim’s Progress. When they landed at Plymouth Rock, they were
greeted by Indians, who came down the hill rolling their was hoops before them. The Indian squabs carried
porpoises on their back. Any of the indian heroes were killed, along with their cabooses, which proved very fatal
for them. The winter of 1620 was a hard on for the settlers. Many people died and many babies were born.
Captain John Smith was responsible for all this.
One of the causes of the revolutionary Wars was the English put tacks in their tea. Also, the colonists would send
their parcels through the post without stamps. During the war, Red Coates and Paul Revere was throwing balls
over stone walls. The dogs were barking and the peacocks crowing. Finally, the colonists won the War and no
longer had to pay for taxis.
Delegates from the original thirteen states formed the Contented Congress. Thomas Jefferson, a virgin and
Benjamin Franklin were two singers of the Declaration of Independence. Franklin had gone to Boston carrying
all his clothes in his pocket and a loaf of bread under each arm. He invented electricity by rubbing cats backward
and declared “a horse divided against itself cannot stand.” Franklin died in 1790 and is still dead.
George Washington married Matha Curits and in due time became the Father of our country. Then the
Constitution of the United States was adopted to secure domestic hostility. Under the Constitution the people
enjoyed the right to keep bare arms. Contributed by Stan Mussared. (Part 3 (final) March 2018 edition)
GRAFTON U3A FEBRUARY 2018 PAGE 5
A TOUCH OF HUMOUR
SEENAGER o I just discovered my age group! I am a Seenager. (Senior teenager)
o I have everything that I wanted as a teenager, only 50-60 years later.
o I don't have to go to school or work.
o I get an allowance every month.
o I have my own pad.
o I don't have a curfew.
o I have a driver's license and my own car.
o The people I hang around with are not scared of getting pregnant, they aren’t scared of anything, they have been blessed to live this long, why be scared?
o And I don't have acne.
o Life is Good! Also, you will feel much more intelligent after reading this, if you are a Seenager.
o Brains of older people are slow because they know so much.
o People do not decline mentally with age, it just takes them longer to recall facts because they have more information in their brains.
o Scientists believe this also makes you hard of hearing as it puts pressure on your inner ear.
o Also, older people often go to another room to get something and when they get there, they stand there wondering what they came for.
o I have more friends with whom I should share this news, but right now I can't remember their names.
Contributed by Rita Bullen
QUIZ FOR BRIGHT PEOPLE There are only nine questions. They are straight questions with straight answers. Answers March Journal.
1. Name the one sport in which neither the spectators nor the participants know the score or the leader until the
contest ends.
2. What famous North American landmark is constantly moving backward?
3 Of all vegetables, only two can live to produce on their own for several growing seasons. All other vegetables
must be replanted every year. What are the only two perennial vegetables?
4. What fruit has its seeds on the outside?
5. In many liquor stores, you can buy pear brandy, with a real pear inside the bottle. The pear is whole and ripe,
and the bottle is genuine; it hasn't been cut in any way. How did the pear get inside the bottle?
6. Only three words in standard English begin with the letters ' dw' and they are all common words. Name two
of them.
7. There are 14 punctuation marks in English grammar. Can you name at least half of them?
8. Name the only vegetable or fruit that is never sold frozen, canned, processed, cooked, or in any other form
except fresh.
9. Name 6 or more things that you can wear on your feet beginning with the letter 'S.'
SMILING IS INFECTIOUS
Smiling is infectious
You catch it like the flu
When someone smiled at me today
I started smiling too
I passed around the corner
And someone saw my grin
When he smiled I realised
I’d passed it on to him
I thought about that smile
Then I realised its worth
A single smile, just like mine
Could travel round the earth
So, if you feel a smile begin
Don’t leave it undetected
Let’s start an epidemic quick
And get the world infected
GRAFTON U3A FEBRUARY 2018 PAGE 6
DEPARTMENT OF HUMAN SERVICES
Financial Information Service
GRAFTON Seminar Program for March – June 2018
SEMINAR TITLE DESCRIPTION DATE TIME
Understanding your Pension
Rates of payments,
How income and assets are assessed
Centrelink assessment issues
Concessions and other services
Wednesday
28-Feb-18 10:30 – 12:00
Aged Care Fees and Charges
Determining aged care needs
Fees and charges
Options for the former home
Pension and taxation implications
Wednesday
28-Feb-18 2:15 – 4:00
Understanding superannuation
Contribution limits and withdrawal/access
rules
Taxation
Recent budget changes
Wednesday
21-Mar-18 2:30 – 4:00
Understanding income streams
(Pensions and Annuities)
How income streams work
Centrelink assessments
Transition to retirement
Wednesday
21-Mar-18 4:30 – 6:00
Accommodation Options in
Retirement
Moving homes
Granny flats, Retirement Villages
Downsizing
Freeing up capital
Wednesday
18-Apr-18 2:30 – 4:00
Estate Planning
Financial planning
Guardianship and power of attorney
Intestacy and wills, insurance
Wednesday
30-May-18 10:30 – 12:00
Working Beyond Pension
Retirement Age
Choices at Age Pension, Age
Income test and work bonus
Taxation and superannuation initiatives
Wednesday
30-May-18 2:30 – 4:00
ALL SEMINAR SESSIONS WILL BE HELD AT THE GRAFTON LIBRARY
PLEASE NOTE THAT BOOKINGS ARE ESSENTIAL
TO BOOK RING 136 357 OR EMAIL [email protected]
(if emailing, contact at least 3 business days early)
To view other seminars, topics and locations such as Coffs Harbour:
www.humanservices.gov.au/fis
other human services information
www.humanservices.gov.au
www.facebook.com/humanservicesAU
Note: topics and times may be subject to change, bookings essential
GRAFTON U3A FEBRUARY 2018 PAGE 7
COURSES AND GROUPS
COORDINATORS ALYSAN PENDER 6644 5397 PAT CONNOLLY 66426695
MEMBERS PLEASE NOTE - YOU MUST CONTACT THE CONVENOR PRIOR TO JOINING COURSES/GROUPS
COURSE/GROUP CONVENOR PHONE LOCATION DAY/DATE TIME
ARMCHAIR TRAVEL Magda
Mussared 6644 9309
U3A Rooms Dougherty House
4th Tuesday 1.00 – 3.00pm
BOARD GAMES & SCRABBLE Vanda
Geremia 6642 7880
U3A Rooms Dougherty House
In recess
BOOK DISCUSSION Mary-Lou
Brown 6644 5167
U3A Rooms Dougherty House
3rd Monday 1.00 – 3.00pm
BUSH WALKING Peter Mears 6643 5748 The Great Outdoors Watch Journal for
details
CHESS Stan
Mussared 6644 9309
U3A Rooms Dougherty House
2nd & 4th Thursdays 1.00 – 3.00pm
COMPUTER USERS GROUP Tom Dennis 6642 2502 U3A Rooms
Dougherty House Alternate Fridays
2.00 – 4.00pm
CREATIVE WRITING Dorothy Hillis 6642 7427 U3A Rooms
Dougherty House 2nd & 4th Tuesdays
1.30 – 4.00pm
DISCUSSION GROUP –
ALTERNATE IDEAS Pauline Cole 6644 5446
Room 4 South Services Club
Tuesdays 1.00 – 3.30pm
EARTH’S CHANGING CLIMATE Nick Reeve 6642 5367 U3A Rooms
Dougherty House In recess
FIVE HUNDRED & CANASTA Marie Keynes 6642 1184 South Services
Club Thursdays
9.00 – 11.30pm
GOOD VIBES VOCAL GROUP Helen
Hearnshaw 6642 5073 Conservatorium Mondays
1.00 – 2.30pm
GUITAR Leonie Hayes 6643 2211 U3A Rooms
Dougherty House 2nd & 4th Wednesdays
1.00 - 2.30pm
GUITAR – BEGINNERS Leonie Hayes 6643 2211 U3A Rooms
Dougherty House 2nd & 4th Wednesdays
2.30 - 3.30pm
HISTORY CLUB
Nancye Eggins
Nola Mackey
6642 4147 6644 9465
U3A Rooms Dougherty House
In recess
LANGUAGE – FRENCH Andre Cunin 0422448434 U3A Rooms
Dougherty House In recess
MAHJONG – WEDNESDAY Ingrid Pollack 6643 3880 CWA Rooms Wednesdays 9.30 – 12
noon
MAHJONG - TUESDAY Mary-Lou
Brown 6644 5167
U3A Rooms Dougherty House
Tuesdays 9.30 – 12
noon
MEDITATION Pauline Cole 6644 5446 Room 4 South
Services Club Tuesdays
9.45 –
11.30am
MENS SHED
Frank Heppell David
Abrahams
0407259949 0407413813
Brewery Complex Wednesdays 8.00 – 3.00pm
TABLE TENNIS Florence Collinson
6642 3921 Grafton Golf Club Tuesdays 2.00 – 4.00pm
TAI CHI
Nancye Eggins
Raelee Baird
6642 4147 6644 8406
Room 4 South Services Club
Tuesdays 11.30 – 12.30pm
A HISTORY OF
IMPRESSIONISM -
MONET TO VAN GOGH
Alysan Pender 6644 5397 U3A Rooms
Dougherty House Fridays
10.00 – 12 noon
UKULELE Leonie Hayes 6643 2211 U3A Rooms
Dougherty House 1st & 3rd Wednesdays
1.00 – 2.30pm
UKULELE – BEGINNERS Leonie Hayes 6643 2211 U3A Rooms
Dougherty House 1st & 3rd Wednesdays
2.30 – 3.30pm
UNSOLVED MYSTERIES Maree
Burrows 6642 1640
U3A Rooms Dougherty House
3rd Thursday 1.00 – 3.00pm
WOODWORK FOR WOMEN Kevin Watkins 6644 5518 Mens Shed Watch Journal for
start date
GRAFTON U3A FEBRUARY 2018 PAGE 8
CHRISTMAS LUNCHEON ENCORE
