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A Writer’s Portfolio Christina AutieroChristina AutieroChristina AutieroChristina Autiero

English 615 Spring 2011

Professor Jason Wirtz

Table of Contents

Introduction Introduction Introduction Introduction 3 Creative Writing Pieces:Creative Writing Pieces:Creative Writing Pieces:Creative Writing Pieces: “Paper Thin,” In The Moment 6 “Wavering Reach,” Embedded Research Story 10 “Restored Truth,” Digital Poem 15 Research Pieces:Research Pieces:Research Pieces:Research Pieces: Annotated Bibliography for research paper 17 Research Paper “Jesus Christ: Man or Messiah?” 22 Reflection:Reflection:Reflection:Reflection: Digital Poetry Write Up 26 Personalized Assignment Descriptions:Personalized Assignment Descriptions:Personalized Assignment Descriptions:Personalized Assignment Descriptions: In The Moment 29 Digital Poem 30 Research Paper Project 31 Professional Book Presentation:Professional Book Presentation:Professional Book Presentation:Professional Book Presentation: Writing Magic Handout 32 Appendix: DraftsAppendix: DraftsAppendix: DraftsAppendix: Drafts “Paper Thin” 34 “Wavering Reach” 36

IntroductionIntroductionIntroductionIntroduction

I chose this cover because I felt it illustrated both me as a writer, and me as a teacher of writing. Since I was able to pick up a pen, I was always journaling. I wrote in my journal every single day, it was not just a book of paper to me, but a friend. This journaling fostered my interest in creative writing. The more I journaled, the more interested I became in writing fiction, poetry, and memoirs. And the more I read, the better my writing became. In this cover the picture of the journal is framed by the books I have read that I feel have shaped me most as a writer and teacher of writing. It is a timeline of my reading history, beginning at the top left hand corner. The first book is 101 Bug Jokes. When I was a little girl, I used to carry this book around, pretending to read it even though I had not learned how to read yet. For some reason, I really wanted to read this book. This book helped foster my love for reading. Then came a series of children’s books I read, and then around the age of eight I picked up the book Little Women. I’ve read this book countless times ever since that day. It was this book that incited my passion for reading. This is still my favorite book, and whenever I look at it, it reminds me of what I want to do as a teacher: help my students feel that same passion for reading that I did when I first read this book. Another book in this frame that has especially shaped me as a writer and teacher of writing is Dr. Suess’s The Sneetches. As you can see from the time-line, I read this book much later in life than I was meant to. However, when I read the Dr. Seuss books at the age of eighteen I became fascinated by his work. Dr. Seuss’s books such as The Sneetches are not ordinary children’s books. They are written in plain, fun, rhyming language that children can understand, but also speak to serious issues such as Hitler and the Nazis, the Cold War, and deforestation. Dr. Seuss’s ability to incorporate this into nursery rhymes is brilliant, and shows us just how creative and limitless writing can be. As I continue in life, I know more books will be added to this timeline that enhance my writing and teaching, and I will also gain more experience as a writer. I feel this class was a great learning experience for me. I was challenged in new ways. It was the first time I ever did video editing and worked with a project such as the digital poem. It was also a new experience for me to share personal experiences with my classmates, which I did through the digital poem. This class also challenged me to be more confident in my work because we did so much peer editing work. I feel that after this semester I am both a better critic, and a better re-ceiver of criticism because of my experience editing and receiving feedback in class. Overall, I feel this class was a challenging, positive learning experience for me that I believe will make me both a better teacher and better writer in the future. I have developed both as a writer and teacher of writing this semester. When I was younger, I did a lot of creative writing but I stopped around high school and

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never wrote again after that until my final semester of my undergraduate work when I took a creative writing class. When I took that class I remembered how much free-dom and expression comes with writing, and how it is important to tap into that. So this semester was my second creative writing class. I feel like the “in the moment” assignment helped me grow as a writer because it really showed me the difference between showing and telling and writing a scene vs. writing a summary. I also learned a lot about writing in first person, since both my stories are in first person. First person is a very personal writing point of view that helps the reader connect with the writer. In my last assignment, “Wavering Reach,” though I was writing in first person I wasn’t actually writing as myself—I was writing as Thomas. This was a new challenge to me that helped me grow as a writer because I was no longer sim-ply writing my own memoir in first person. I was now writing from a different point of view—a male point of view—which meant I had to alter my writing style. This class has helped me as a teacher of writing because I have learned to not keep my assignments “in a box.” For example, I really loved the embedded research pro-ject we did because I saw how one can incorporate creative writing into a research paper. I realized that though there are certain things we must do with our students such as research papers, we can modify our instruction so that the assignment will be meaningful to our students. I feel I also learned a lot about group work in the classroom setting. You gave us many tips on how to evaluate students during group work, and I especially liked the concentric circle activity we did to present our books. I think this is a great way to help students become comfortable with public speak-ing. I also think the found poems are a great way to help with comprehension, as well as writing skills. Though the students would be focusing on the book they are writing about in their found poem, that assignment gives them the opportunity to also develop as a creative poet. I think what I took most out of this class as a writ-ing teacher is that there are many ways to incorporate creative writing into your every day lesson plans, and that definitely pays off. I realized the importance of creative writing in ELA classes and it is something that I want to be a big part of my classroom when I am a teacher. I separated my essays into creative writing, research writing, and personal reflec-tion. The first essay in my portfolio is my in the moment story, “Paper Thin.” I chose this one to be first because I think it is the stronger out of my two creative writing pieces. I believe this is my strongest because I feel it is the most powerful, and that it is able to grip the reader. I feel that it has a good pace, and that it is very true to being in the moment. I also really love the title. Next is my embedded research story, “Wavering Reach.” I really enjoyed writing this because I found it fun to write about being in a different time period. However, I feel that this is weaker because it was challenging for me to write from a male’s point of view, especially one that is from a different time period. Last in the creative section I have my digital poem be-cause I feel that this is the most unique out of the three. I feel that my weakest

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project would be the research paper because I found it much more fun to write the creative writing pieces. Also, it was very hard for me to pick and choose what to put into my research paper and what to leave out since there is so much information on my topic. For my final portfolio I revised “Paper Thin” and “Wavering Reach.” I did not make any huge adjustments to either of the two. For “Paper Thin” I added more detailed descriptions that I feel enhance the story, as well as more descriptive sentences that help the reader visualize the story more. I also edited a few of the verb tenses so that the story would be completely in present tense. I feel that this helps it be more of an “in the moment” story. For “Wavering Reach” I added more embedded research to the story. I want readers to know more about the time period from read-ing it, so I added more details such as the clothes they wore, and I tried to make their words truer to the words said back then. Therefore, I added citations of all the quotes I have taken from the Bible that Thomas and the other apostles actually said. The difficult part about this is that there are so many different versions of the Bible, so it was hard to decide which version best fit the tone of my story. I enjoyed the peer review process. I really enjoyed working with the same group for a few class meetings because I felt we were more productive each time we got to-gether. We were more comfortable with each other and knew what the others ex-pected out of the stories. I feel that as a teacher perhaps I would switch peer-editing group members each quarter/semester. This way the students will be com-fortable with their group members, but they will also have the chance to work with other students. Perhaps what could have been better about our peer review proc-ess was if we were in a bigger space, because often it was hard to hear each other when we were reading our stories aloud since we were talking over all the other groups in a small space. I think reflecting metacognitively helps me understand my writing process because it helps me notice both my strengths and my weaknesses. I really enjoy writing re-flection papers, such as the one we wrote after the digital poetry assignment, be-cause this is a great way to reflect metacognitively. After taking this class, I feel that I will have my students write many reflection papers or personal letters to me after working on projects about their thoughts on the project. I think this will encourage metacognitive thinking and self-reflection.

project would be the research paper because I found it much more fun to write the creative writing pieces. Also, it was very hard for me to pick and choose what to put into my research paper and what to leave out since there is so much information on my topic. For my final portfolio I revised “Paper Thin” and “Wavering Reach.” I did not make any huge adjustments to either of the two. For “Paper Thin” I added more detailed descriptions that I feel enhance the story, as well as more descriptive sentences that help the reader visualize the story more. I also edited a few of the verb tenses so that the story would be completely in present tense. I feel that this helps it be more of an “in the moment” story. For “Wavering Reach” I added more embedded research to the story. I want readers to know more about the time period from read-ing it, so I added more details such as the clothes they wore, and I tried to make their words truer to the words said back then. Therefore, I added citations of all the quotes I have taken from the Bible that Thomas and the other apostles actually said. The difficult part about this is that there are so many different versions of the Bible, so it was hard to decide which version best fit the tone of my story. I enjoyed the peer review process. I really enjoyed working with the same group for a few class meetings because I felt we were more productive each time we got to-gether. We were more comfortable with each other and knew what the others ex-pected out of the stories. I feel that as a teacher perhaps I would switch peer-editing group members each quarter/semester. This way the students will be com-fortable with their group members, but they will also have the chance to work with other students. Perhaps what could have been better about our peer review proc-ess was if we were in a bigger space, because often it was hard to hear each other when we were reading our stories aloud since we were talking over all the other groups in a small space. I think reflecting metacognitively helps me understand my writing process because it helps me notice both my strengths and my weaknesses. I really enjoy writing re-flection papers, such as the one we wrote after the digital poetry assignment, be-cause this is a great way to reflect metacognitively. After taking this class, I feel that I will have my students write many reflection papers or personal letters to me after working on projects about their thoughts on the project. I think this will encourage metacognitive thinking and self-reflection.

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Paper Thin

I glance at the clock. 9:48 PM. “Twelve minutes left,” I whisper, dropping the

envelope in my lap.

So what if this isn’t the “happily ever after” I saw in all those movies as a young

girl? Was I ever cut out to be a Disney princess, anyway? Perhaps this could be my own,

distorted happily ever after. I don’t need a Prince Charming to sweep me off my feet or a

handsome prince to ride off into the sunset with. I just need someone who loves me.

And he loves me. He loves me.

I lean my head back against the headrest, tying my coarse brunette curls into a

bun. A few curls manage to escape the constraint of my hair tie, sticking to my tear-

stained cheeks. “Can I not even control my own hair?” I groan to myself. Frustrated, I

pull my hair back again and lean my head into the steering wheel. “This is pointless,” I

mutter, sticking the keys into the ignition.

But there it is, lying on my lap. The envelope that holds the power to change my

fate. A letter I had written in a moment of courage. The letter telling him I want him out

of my life for good. But that courage only exists on paper. I can’t feel it within me.

Maybe those words are meant to live only in that letter, as a dream of what could have

been. But they are not what I need.But they are not what I need.But they are not what I need.But they are not what I need. Are those words even my true feelings and desires? Are those words even my true feelings and desires? Are those words even my true feelings and desires? Are those words even my true feelings and desires?

Or have I just fooled myself into believing so? What if I never find another person who

loves me? Wouldn’t I rather grow old with a monster, than grow old all alone?

As a little girl, my favorite part of the year was when my family and I would

vacation to Disney world. Though what I loved most about the vacation was running

around the parks and taking pictures with Mickey Mouse, I also loved being at the

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airport, especially the baggage claim area. I would watch the suitcases revolve around and

around the airport carousel, just waiting for someone to claim them as their own. Most

luggage would be whisked off in a hurry by happy travelers. Others, usually those that had

been damaged in transit, were left revolving on the dirty belt, unclaimed. My boyfriend, he

had saved me from being unwanted baggage being unwanted baggage being unwanted baggage being unwanted baggage. I was the damaged goods, and he was the and he was the and he was the and he was the

man willing to take me inman willing to take me inman willing to take me inman willing to take me in. He’s right to do the things he does, I deserve them. I’m not good

enough for him, I’m lucky to have him. I’m lucky to have him. I’m lucky to have him. I’m lucky to have him.

“I can’t give him this letter.” I assure myself, ready ready ready ready to rip it in halfto rip it in halfto rip it in halfto rip it in half.

But what if, my mind whispers to me. Those words stop me dead in my tracks. The

what if’s are always creeping up on me, forcing their way into my mind. They refuse to let

me rest. They know exactly how to manipulate me, how to make me cry, make me hate my-

self, make me hate him. And though I have considered what if’s argument many times, at

the end of the day I’m still his object. His ownership. The what if’s are not strong enough to

compete against his power over me.

“Why can’t I just wake up from this nightmare?” I grumble, throwing the letter onto

the passenger’s seat.

I glance over to the clock again. 9:55 PM. Five more minutes and then his car will

pull up next to mine. In five minutes you will have the opportunity to be courageous and

selfish for the first time in your life, my mind tells me. You can be free from this relation-

ship. “But courage and selfishness has consequences,” I whisper back“But courage and selfishness has consequences,” I whisper back“But courage and selfishness has consequences,” I whisper back“But courage and selfishness has consequences,” I whisper back, grazing my fingers

over the red marks on my right arm. “I can’t let him do what he did this morning again.”

Cradling my arm in my chest, I try to stop my mind from remembering the horror that oc-

curred just a few hours ago.

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“Because I’m right! What is it going to take to make you understand that I’m right!” He had

shouted at my sister. He was breathing heavily, his nostrils flaring, that look of dark pas-

sion was in his eyes. The look that held not only anger, but excitement. Excitement to exer-

cise his control, to show everyone he was in charge. I tried to interject. “Listen, she didn’t

mean to make you angry. This is all just a misunder-”

“Shut up!” He barked at me. “Just shut up!” He turned towards me and grabbed me

by the arm, tugging me into him. We were face to face, body tremblingbody tremblingbody tremblingbody trembling. “Please,” I quietly

sobbed. “Just calm down-”

“I said shut your mouth!” He screamed, his grip tightening,his grip tightening,his grip tightening,his grip tightening, his hot breath burning

my tear-stained cheeks.

“Stop thinking about it!” I yell, slamming my hands onto the steering wheel. I need

to stop myself from getting lost in thought. I can’t allow myself to think of that moment. I I I I

just need to block it out so everything will be okay.just need to block it out so everything will be okay.just need to block it out so everything will be okay.just need to block it out so everything will be okay. “Like it never happened. Don’t worry it

never happened,” I tell myself. I have become my own comforter, my only confidant. When

had I become so alone?

But he has fixed me - my imperfections and all. No one cares for me like he does.

What he does to me, it is just his way of showing his love for me, showing that he loves me

so much that he is willing to do anything to change me. To change me to become a better

person. A person more like him.

But you’re not happy, my mind pleads with me. This is not the life you wanted to

live, and it’s not too late to make a change. Don’t you believe in yourself anymore?

“I do believe in myself,” I whisper, reaching for the envelope once more. “I do.”

Lights flash in my rearview mirror. His car pulls into the parking spot behind me. I

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twist the envelope between my two hands. “This is it,” I whisper to myself, taking a deep

breath.

My hand touches the car door handle and a shock of electricity shoots through my

arms. “Nerves,” I mutter, trying my best to shove them off as I pull the handle into my

body. I step out of the car, staring down at the ground, my right hand grasping tightly onto my right hand grasping tightly onto my right hand grasping tightly onto my right hand grasping tightly onto

the envelopethe envelopethe envelopethe envelope. “This is it. This is my moment. It is now or never,” I repeatedly assure my-

self, walking towards the parked car.

We stand face to face, neither of us saying a word. I examine the creases in his

forehead, the dark circles under his eyes, the coarse hair on his chin. That look is in his

eyes again. The look of superiority, the look that always taunts me saying, “I’m better than

you, you’re nothing without me. You don‘t even deserve me.” You don’t deserve him, my

mind reminds me. You deserve better. You can do this, just hand him the letter and stay

strong-

He wraps his icy arms around my body, taking all of my thoughts captive with that

one embrace. His two hands meet at the small of my back and pull me in close. I stand

lifeless. My right hand grasps onto the letter tighter. I can’t let this embrace take control

over me. I need to stay strong. I lift the envelope towards him and begin to speak: “I can’t, I

just can’t-”

“I love you,” he whispers into my ear. “I love you more than anyone in this world

does, and I will love you forever.”

I wrap my arms around him, dropping the letter to the floor.

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Wavering Reach

I understood nothing. Why did He allow this to happen to Him? I had seen

Him raise the dead, had this been no different? Why were the people so unjust?

Had they not known who He was? ‘He who has ears to hear, let him hear,’ He had

told us. Yet while seeing they did not see; while hearing, they did not hear.

Only one week had passed since the last time I had walked this path from

Bethpage to Jerusalem, yet so much had changed within that time. I could see the

faint remains of the colt’s footprints on the dirt path. The palms were scattered all

around, and I could still hear the people joyfully shouting, waving them high in the

air. Yet now the palms crunched underneath my thin sandalsthin sandalsthin sandalsthin sandals, dried up and thirsting

in the heat. It was a dry and thirsty land, yet one week ago it had been filled with

the living water. We had been surrounded by so much life and joy, it seemed that

even the rocks had cried out in praise that day--but now we had nothing. One week

ago we had traveled here to bring healing and life to the people. The people who

had welcomed Him that day, but cursed and beat Him five days later. Now, I was

traveling to hide from them. I hated what they did to Him, how they made Him suf-

fer. But I would do nothing to avenge it. He had prayed for them unto His last hour.

I kneeled down and grabbed a handful of sand from the ground. I poured it

between my hands, watching the grains glisten in the sunlight. There must had

been hundreds of grains in that handful, but all together they were no larger than a

stone. If ye have faith as a grain of a mustard seed, I h If ye have faith as a grain of a mustard seed, I h If ye have faith as a grain of a mustard seed, I h If ye have faith as a grain of a mustard seed, I heard faintly, nothing shall be eard faintly, nothing shall be eard faintly, nothing shall be eard faintly, nothing shall be

impossible unto you. impossible unto you. impossible unto you. impossible unto you. Was my faith enough to bring back my friend, as His had

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raised Lazarus? Or had my faith, too, dried out in grief?

“Thomas, Thomas!” Peter cried running towards me. “We have seen the Lord!”

Could this be true? Had He returned? Behold, we go up to Jerusalem; and the Son ? Behold, we go up to Jerusalem; and the Son ? Behold, we go up to Jerusalem; and the Son ? Behold, we go up to Jerusalem; and the Son

of man shall be delivered unto the chief priests, and unto the scribes; and they shall coof man shall be delivered unto the chief priests, and unto the scribes; and they shall coof man shall be delivered unto the chief priests, and unto the scribes; and they shall coof man shall be delivered unto the chief priests, and unto the scribes; and they shall con-n-n-n-

demn him to death, and shall deliver him to the Gentiles, demn him to death, and shall deliver him to the Gentiles, demn him to death, and shall deliver him to the Gentiles, demn him to death, and shall deliver him to the Gentiles, He had explained.He had explained.He had explained.He had explained. And they shall And they shall And they shall And they shall

mock him, and shall scourge him, andmock him, and shall scourge him, andmock him, and shall scourge him, andmock him, and shall scourge him, and shall spit upon him, and shall kill him: and the third shall spit upon him, and shall kill him: and the third shall spit upon him, and shall kill him: and the third shall spit upon him, and shall kill him: and the third

day he shall rise again.day he shall rise again.day he shall rise again.day he shall rise again. Three days had now passed. Had His promise been fulfilled?

“Thomas, Thomas!” Peter shouted, grabbing me by the shoulders and shaking me grabbing me by the shoulders and shaking me grabbing me by the shoulders and shaking me grabbing me by the shoulders and shaking me

so violently that my cloak fell away so violently that my cloak fell away so violently that my cloak fell away so violently that my cloak fell away from my tunicfrom my tunicfrom my tunicfrom my tunic. “He came to our hiding place! He is

here! He has risen, he has returned!” he shouted at me, expecting me to shout as well. Yet

I remained lifeless. I could not erase the image from my mind of Him nailed to his death,

the blood and pain that covered His body in scarlet red. I knew what He promised, but I

had seen Him defeated by death.

“Come, Thomas!” Peter said impatiently, pulling my arm towards him. “We have

seen the Lord!”

I ripped his hand off from my arm. “Except I shall see in his h. “Except I shall see in his h. “Except I shall see in his h. “Except I shall see in his hands the print of the ands the print of the ands the print of the ands the print of the

nails, and put my finger into the print of the nails, and thrust my hand into his side, I will nails, and put my finger into the print of the nails, and thrust my hand into his side, I will nails, and put my finger into the print of the nails, and thrust my hand into his side, I will nails, and put my finger into the print of the nails, and thrust my hand into his side, I will

not believenot believenot believenot believe,”,”,”,” I said, sternly.

“But Thom-”

“No, Peter,” I said, turning to walk away. “Unless I see the scars of his nails in His

hands, and put my fingers on those scars and my hands in His side, I say to you, I will not

believe.” I headed back towards Bethpage, not looking back.

——–

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Seven days had passed since Peter had told me that he had seen the lord, and it was now

time for me to return to our hideout. Seven long days had passed, yet I still had not seen

the evidence. I needed the evidence. The other apostles, they were always so sure. Be-

fore his death, he had told us that he was leaving to prepare a place for us. What did he

mean, “prepare a place?” The other apostles understood, but I had asked, “Lord, we know Lord, we know Lord, we know Lord, we know

not whither thou goest; and how can we know the way?” not whither thou goest; and how can we know the way?” not whither thou goest; and how can we know the way?” not whither thou goest; and how can we know the way?” Yet his response was simple. “I

am the way, the truth and the life,” he had told me. “No one goes to the Father except

through me.” At that time, I assumed I would go to the Father, because I knew His son. But

did I ever truly know him? Was he even the son?

Or was he merely a liar? Were my brothers and I deceived? Yet how could he die, so

purely, if a liar? How could we have believed in, so assuredly, a falsehood? Was he a luna-

tic? Yet I saw his hands heal the sick, cleanse the lepers, raise the dead. I saw him give to

the meek, rise up the humble, and feed the multitudes that starved. I felt his love; I experi-

enced his power, his glory, his might. But I also saw his hands and feet nailed down by

greater strength. I witnessed the veil collapse. I watched the whips of hatred and scorns of

evil. I saw the triumph of death.

I was now approaching the apostles’ hideout. I knocked on the door.

“Good morning, Thomas,” John said, greeting me at the door and welcoming me into

the room. They were all gathered on the ground, praying. I walked over to join them. Peter

ran towards me.

“Thomas, we have seen him,” he said, grabbing both my hands.

“Silence,” one of them said, rising up. “He will see soon enough. Until then, let us

pray.”

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I tried to pray with them, but my faith was gone. They were so full of faith, so full of

life, I could not bear to stand in their midst. I was no longer one of them. It was all a mis-

take. This was not my place, this was not my calling, this was not my purpose. But he had

chosen me. He had picked me from the masses; to be one of the twelve he taught and

shared his secrets with. But was he still my lord?

The apostles were deep in prayer; they did not even acknowledge my existence. I I I I

walked over to the doors, sealed closed with mud and sticks.walked over to the doors, sealed closed with mud and sticks.walked over to the doors, sealed closed with mud and sticks.walked over to the doors, sealed closed with mud and sticks. Would the authorities be

coming to capture us soon? To charge us with penalty, possibly death, for believing that he

had been the messiah? Was that a risk worth taking? Did I want to spend the rest of my

life hiding out, in fear of death? I did not fear death when I was with him, for I knew he was

stronger than death. Yet he had been defeated by death. He did not return as he had

promised. There was no one in this room with pierced nails and sides. Only mere humans,

rejoicing in the resurrection, though there was no visible evidence. There was only my

memory of a broken body and destroyed spirit on the cross. Our lord was no longer here;

he had not returned to bring the comfort he promised. My hands grasped the door, pulling

it back towards me.

“Who are you!” I gasped, finding a man standing on the other side of the door.

“Reach hither thy finger,” he said. I stood motionless, staring at him.

“Reach hither thy finger,” he said a“Reach hither thy finger,” he said a“Reach hither thy finger,” he said a“Reach hither thy finger,” he said again. “Behold my hands. And reach out thy hand, gain. “Behold my hands. And reach out thy hand, gain. “Behold my hands. And reach out thy hand, gain. “Behold my hands. And reach out thy hand,

and thrust it into my side.”and thrust it into my side.”and thrust it into my side.”and thrust it into my side.” I stared at him in fear.

“Be not faithless,” he said gently, cupping his hand on my shoulder. “But believing.

Reach hither.”

I thrust my hands into his side.

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“Receive ye the Holy Ghost,” he said.

“My Lord and my God!”My Lord and my God!”My Lord and my God!”My Lord and my God!” I cried, removing my hands from his wounds and

falling to my knees.

“Thomas, because thou hast seen me, thou has believed,” He said, wrapping “Thomas, because thou hast seen me, thou has believed,” He said, wrapping “Thomas, because thou hast seen me, thou has believed,” He said, wrapping “Thomas, because thou hast seen me, thou has believed,” He said, wrapping me in His arms. “Blessed are they who have nome in His arms. “Blessed are they who have nome in His arms. “Blessed are they who have nome in His arms. “Blessed are they who have not seen, and yet have believed.”t seen, and yet have believed.”t seen, and yet have believed.”t seen, and yet have believed.” Scriptures Cited:Scriptures Cited:Scriptures Cited:Scriptures Cited: (in order they appear in text, all are bolded and either in quotes or ita(in order they appear in text, all are bolded and either in quotes or ita(in order they appear in text, all are bolded and either in quotes or ita(in order they appear in text, all are bolded and either in quotes or italicized)licized)licized)licized) Matthew 17:20, King James Version Mark 10:33-34, King James Version John 20:25, King James Version John 20:25, King James Version John 14:5, King James Version John 20:27, King James Version John 20:22, King James Version John 20:28, King James Version John 20:29, King James Version

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“Restored Truth”

Link: http://youtu.be/k-aoY4y_mRE

All in all I am generally happy with the way my digital poem turned out. I think it ex-pressed well what I was hoping to achieve, and I also think it was good for my first shot at video editing. That being said, I actually did do a little revising to my digi-poem after I presented it to the class. I changed the pacing a little, because I felt that some of the shots flashed by too quickly without people being able to read it. I also changed the timing of the music so that the music lined up with the words of the poem exactly how I wanted them to. The link above is the most updated verson of my digipoem. If I were to make extensive changes to my digipoem, I would first get rid of the title shot at the beginning of it. The only reason I have this is because I felt the action started too quickly and that there needed to be a second or two for people to get settled watching so that they would not miss anything or be overwhelmed. I think I would have the notebook slowly open up, or have it be positioned on the desk to take up these few seconds of time. Also, there are some parts of the video in which the camera was shaking, and some where the lighting changed between shots. I would also make changes here and re-shoot those images so that the lighting would be more consistent throughout the video, and so there would be no shaking during it. I would also change my handwriting in some of the shots. Writing in stop motion is actually pretty difficult since you are only writing part of each letter in each take. I would try to make my handwriting neater in certain takes, if possible. Lastly, I would try working on this video in a different editing program. I used Windows Movie Maker to make this video. However, I would like to try other programs such as I-Movie. One thing I found lacking with Windows Movie Maker is the limiting title and

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credits templates you can choose from to use. The font was very plain and the size options were only small, medium, or large. I know that in I-Movie you are able to customize your title and credits more, so that is something I would like to try. Also, I think it would be good to become familiarized with other editing programs besides Windows Movie Maker. I think the most difficult part of the digital poem is deciding how long to make it. What should you delete? What should you add? Perhaps if I were to revise my cur-rent digital poem I would change some of the journal notes. I think I would also change the last frame (where the scripture is written in the notebook) and write that out in stop motion instead of having the still photograph on the screen. The reason I did the still photograph was that it was too much for me to write that all out in stop motion as well. I would change the ending of my digital poem by doing stop motion of footprints in the sand. There is a poem called footprints in the sand about God carrying us in our time of need. I think it would be awesome to go to a sandbox or beach and take stop motion pictures of footprints appearing in the sand. This would be diffi-cult, however, because it would be hard to get the stills of the footprint starting to form in the sand since sand is light and moves so quickly. Originally, I wanted to do this for the assignment but I could not get to the beach in time. I searched YouTube and Google images for stop motion animation of footprints in the sand or stop mo-tion stills of them, but I could not find them anywhere. If I added this, I would de-lete the scene from Passion of The Christ which is the woman with the issue of blood reaching out to Jesus. However, I do think that video clip of the woman did flow well with my video. So perhaps I could also use the footprints in the sand for a future project if I ended up doing that. Working on the digital poem has interested me in starting more video projects. I actually enjoy the editing process (as long as I have time to do it). If I were to make another digipoem, I would want to make one out of video footage that I recorded. I would like to make one of just video footage playing, and another of a mix of video image and still photographs. I found while watching digitalpoems that I seemed to enjoy those more that were only images or only videos—I feel that when the two are mixed together it throws the balance of the video off. If I were to make more digital poems I would probably focus them around the same theme of glorifying God. I also think this would be really great to do as a present for someone special in my life such as a family member. I would love to make one about my childhood, and restore old video footage that my family has and put them to words of a poem. This was truly a unique project that I would love to teach to my students in the fu-ture. It was a great way to express our creativity and though it took a lot of work, I am really glad that I was able to do this project.

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“He has risen! He is alive! Praise to our God!” they were shouting and

crying out.

Annotated Bibliography for “Jesus Christ: Man or Messiah?” I.I.I.I. HISTORICAL EVIDENCE OF JESUS CHRIST & CHRISTIANITYHISTORICAL EVIDENCE OF JESUS CHRIST & CHRISTIANITYHISTORICAL EVIDENCE OF JESUS CHRIST & CHRISTIANITYHISTORICAL EVIDENCE OF JESUS CHRIST & CHRISTIANITY

Halverson, Dean C. The Compact Guide to World Religions. Bloomington, MN: Bethany House,

1996. Print.

This handbook is a guide that briefly explains the origins and beliefs of the most prevalent religions of our time: Islam, Buddhism, Hinduism, Taoism, Judaism, Secularism, and The New Age. It is written for Christians so that they can better understand and respect others’ beliefs. Though this is helpful in un-derstanding the basic beliefs of each religion, Christianity is the only belief sys-tem that this book fully describes since it is written for Christians. Therefore, it serves as a useful aid when researching Jesus Christ, particularly because of its last two chapters “Is Jesus the Only Way to God?” and “How Can we Know the Bible is the Word of God?” One of the more interesting and convincing ar-guments in these chapters is that the Bible contains scientific knowledge be-fore its own time. One example Halverson includes of this is the Bible’s knowl-edge of the ocean’s deep valleys and towering mountains, though “the people of ancient times thought the ocean floor was ‘flat, sandy, and bowl-like’” (261). This book provides not only useful information about world religions, but also thought-provoking arguments about Christianity’s validity that help build the Christian faith. The King James Study Bible. Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 1975. King James Vers. Print.

· The Old Testament Throughout the Old Testament of the Bible there are many references to the Messiah (the son of God) who will be sent to earth from Heaven. The books of the Old Testament also state that the Messiah will be the seed of many of the people mentioned in the Old Testament stories, such as Abraham and Isaac. This King James study version of the Bible contains a helpful gene-alogy that traces Jesus’ ancestors, validating that he is born from the bloodline the Old Testament stated the Messiah would be seed of. The Old Testament also states in the book of Isaiah that the Son of Man will be born of a virgin, which is proven in the gospel of Luke when Jesus is born to the Virgin Mary. There are also very specific prophecies about the Messiah mentioned in the Old Testament that are fulfilled by Jesus. For example, the Old Testament

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states that a close friend will betray him for thirty pieces of silver, which the apos-tle Judas did. The Old Testament also states in the book of Psalms that the Mes-siah will be sacrificed, pierced through his hands and feet, have no bones broken, and then be resurrected and ascended to God’s right hand. These prophecies are all fulfilled by the accounts given in the New Testament gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John.

· The New Testament The four gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John in the New Testament are accounts of Jesus’ life, his teachings, miracles and moral practices. These gos-pels provide testimonies of Jesus healing leprosy, paralytics, the blind, and even raising the dead. In these gospels it is also written that the disciples witnessed Je-sus walk on water and calm a storm. Perhaps one of the most inviting characteris-tics of Jesus from these gospels is the relationship that he had with his apostles. Through reading through the gospels we see that Jesus referred to them as his friends. “Henceforth I call you not servants; for the servant knoweth not what his lord doeth: but I have called you friends; for all things that I have heard of my Fa-ther I have made known unto you.” (King James Bible, John 15:15). He also is very patient with them. Though he tells them of his resurrection before his death, he is patient and peaceful towards the disciples when they do not believe it is he when he resurrects. We also see in the gospel that Jesus was never harmful to-wards anyone, even those who beat and cursed him. While being tortured on the cross the Bible tells us that he yelled out, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do” (Luke 23:34). These four gospels provide readers with intimate knowledge about Jesus – his own words, beliefs, and life story. These gospels are essential to understanding Jesus Christ. Lewis, C.S. Mere Christianity. New York: HarperCollins, 2001. Print.

This book does not only supply evidence of the truth of the Christian faith, but also provides Biblical truths of how the Christian life should be lived and what one can expect when they accept Jesus Christ as their savior. He gives a very ac-curate, Biblical account of this lifestyle, including not only the positive but also what could be considered the negative aspects as well. In chapter one, Lewis writes about how all human beings have a certain, innate sense of right and wrong, which we regard as human nature. He then presents his belief that Christi-anity is the only sensible explanation for this sense of right and wrong, and throughout the rest of his book provides reasons for this belief. Lewis, C.S. “What Are We to Make of Christ?” Readings for Meditation and Reflec-tion. New

York: Harper Collins, 1992. 22-25. Print.

This is a convincing, well-written essay in which C.S. Lewis examines who Je-sus Christ is, particularly focusing on his words, morals, and resurrection. He asks

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“what are we to make of Christ?” because he believes that after a person studies Christ, he/she must conclude that Jesus is one of three things: the Lord, a liar, or a lunatic. He compares Jesus to other religious figures such as Mohammed and Buddha, and makes the point that Christ is the only religious figure other than God that has claimed he is God. Therefore, Lewis concludes that we cannot simply view Christ as a mere moral teacher. “He produced mainly three effects – Hatred – Terror – Adoration. There was no trace of people expressing mild approval” (23). After reviewing the facts, Lewis tells his readers that there is no question of who Jesus is, and that we simply must either accept or reject the history. McDowell, Josh. More Than a Carpenter. Wheaton, IL: Tyndale House, 2004. Print.

Josh McDowell wrote More Than a Carpenter after years of researching the his-torical evidence of both the Bible and Jesus Christ. He did this research because he was determined to prove that his peers in his college’s Christian fellowship club were wrong. However, after years of research McDowell discovered that his peers, in fact, were right, and he became a follower of Christ. Mcdowell’s story is not only his personal testimony of how he came to know God, but also provides readers with historical evidence of Je-sus’ existence. Throughout the book he stresses that Christianity is not so much a relig-ion or structure of beliefs, but rather a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. This book is a great balance of testimony and research geared towards skeptics and intellectuals who are interested in the validity of the Bible and the relationship between the existence of God and science. Chapter Four, “What about Science?,” and Chapter Five, “Are the Bible Records Reliable,” contain the most useful evidence from his research. Sheler, Jeffrey L. Is The Bible True. New York: HarperCollins, 2000. Print.

Sheler was the religion correspondent for US News and World Report. This book is a collection of his research and findings, and is not an assertion of Christ’s existence, but an assertion that the Bible is compiled of facts, and is historically true. It is filled with overwhelming evidence that validates the Bible. His archeological findings show that the people written about in the Bible did in fact exist. In the conclusion of Sheler’s book he writes, “It is as a witness to that sacred history, to the mighty acts of Israel's God in the affairs of nations and in the lives of people of faith, that the Bible most re-soundingly sets itself apart from other ancient texts. More than the precision of its histo-riography, it is the power of its inspired testimony and the resonance of its timeless mes-sage that has earned the Bible the fidelity and trust of countless millions through the centuries who, having read and believed, have encountered in their won experience the self-revealing God of the universe” (246). This book is a great source for those who are interested in exploring the Bible’s archeological evidence.

Sproul, R.C. Reason to Believe. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 1982. Print.

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“No where does the Bible ‘teach’ that the earth is the center of the uni-verse" (23). Because Sproul presents his argument accepting and apologizing for the mistakes the church has made, it is much more easier for others to consider the claims he is making. He also provides answers to very difficult questions such as why does God allow suffering. Each chapter ends with a few key points to remember that help summa-rize the sometimes overwhelming amount of research included in his chapters. Strobel, Lee. The Case for Christ. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 1998. Print.

Strobel, who one was a Law Editor of the Chicago Tribune and self-proclaimed skeptic, is now a teaching pastor at a church and author of Christian books. The Case for Christ consists mostly of interviews that Strobel conducted in his quest to disprove Jesus as the Messiah. Strobel’s interviews answer many common questions about Jesus and the Bible. Though Strobel began these interviews in hope to disprove Christ’s exis-tence, he instead found an overwhelming amount of evidence that proved that Christ is the Son of God. His book is divided into three sections: the historical record, a profile of Jesus Christ, and evidence for the resurrection of Jesus Christ. As readers progress through the book, they are also able to see how Strobel’s feelings and thoughts towards Christ changed as he divulged deeper into his research. Strobel has many sources to validate the claims he makes about Christ, which gives his text much reliability. This book is good for any who have questions about the Christian faith, as well as Christians who are seeking more evidence for their faith.

II.II.II.II. PERSONAL TESTIMONIAL EVIDENCE OF JESUS CHRIST’S POWERPERSONAL TESTIMONIAL EVIDENCE OF JESUS CHRIST’S POWERPERSONAL TESTIMONIAL EVIDENCE OF JESUS CHRIST’S POWERPERSONAL TESTIMONIAL EVIDENCE OF JESUS CHRIST’S POWER Grier, Randall. Escape From Hell. Broken Arrow, OK: RGM Publications, 1991. Print.

Reverend Randall Grier is a preacher who is a reformed drug addict, criminal, and prisoner. He now travels the world sharing his testimony of how God changed his life. In this book, Reverend Grier shares his life story. Grier’s father was a preacher and Grier grew up in church. However, as Grier grew older he yielded to the pressures around him and decided to stop following God. Grier later ended up addicted to heroine and in-volved in arms robbery. He was arrested three times and escaped from prison. How-ever, shortly after his third escape from prison he felt the love of God drawing him and he re-dedicated his life to Christ. He then turned himself in, and when he went to court pled guilty to all five felonies he had against him. Grier writes, “When I went to court, I had already pled guilty to all five felonies…The Bible tells us about the peace of God that passes all understanding. Inside of me I had a peace I couldn’t explain. In my spirit and my heart, I knew something good was going to happen, that our Father God would take care of things.” Three months later, he received a parole, which he was previously told he would never be able to receive. He knew that “God had supernaturally inter-vened” (34). Grier’s touching, personal testimonies included in this book are inspiring reminders that all things are possible with God.

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“He Lives.” Issuu.com. 20 April 2011. Web. 1 May 2011. < http://issuu.com/mvillecfc/docs/helives> This compilation contains various testimonies from members of the Manhattan-ville College Christian Fellowship Club. The title of this collection is “He Lives,” which, in the introduction to this book, the club vice president asserts reminds us that Jesus rose from the grave, and continues to live today. The purpose of this book is to portray to others the power of Jesus through personal testimony. Many of these testimonies are about struggles God has brought the students through including dealing with suicide, temptation, poverty, danger, and self-esteem is-sues. Others are short memoirs of how the person came to know Jesus Christ. Though this does not contain any factual or historical evidence that Jesus Christ is the Son of God, this is a good read for those who are curious about God’s love and power Also, because this is a collection of various stories, it is easy for others re-late to, especially those who are also college students and/or have dealt with simi-lar issues to the ones written about.

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JJJJesus Christ: Man or Messiah?esus Christ: Man or Messiah?esus Christ: Man or Messiah?esus Christ: Man or Messiah?

Jesus Christ has perhaps been one of the most controversial names in history. He is the only man who has declared, “I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me” (King James Study Bible John 14:6). Though Jesus con-sistently proclaimed that he is the messiah, people have deemed him to be otherwise. Nearly every skeptic and even every clergyman has grappled with Jesus’ claim. His account, which has been preserved in the Bible for thousands of years, has not only served as inspiration for Christian beliefs, but has also been thrust onto the blame for many debates, struggles, divisions, and wars between humans. However, despite the claims against the Bible’s validity, it still remains in print and research continues to be found that verifies its credibility as a source. Historical evidence of the Bible, fulfilled Biblical prophecies about the messiah, and personal testimonies from Christians sup-ply an overwhelming amount of evidence that validate Jesus’ claim to be the son of God. These sources provide credibility for the accounts of Jesus’ life contained in the Bible’s New Testament, and prove that Jesus Christ is the messiah he professed to be. The New Testament is the primary resource for information about Jesus. However,

many have questioned its validity. Though the New Testament has been criticized to

be a fictional account, research has shown otherwise. Author Joshua McDowell of

More Than a Carpenter was one of the many people who deemed the Bible to be his-

torically untrustworthy. He therefore pursued years of research, hoping to find more

substance for his claim. However, McDowell writes that he “found evidence. Evi-

dence in abundance…that the Old and New Testament documents were some of the

most reliable writings in all of antiquity” (7). Other writers, such as Lee Strobel and

Jeffrey L. Sheler, have had similar experiences. Both Strobel and Sheler were journal-

ists researching the validity of the Bible and Jesus’ claim to be the messiah. Sheler

was not only amazed by historical and archeological findings that validate the Bible

but also “the resonance of its timeless message that has earned the Bible the fidelity

and trust of countless millions through the centuries who, having read and believed,

have encountered in their won experience the self-revealing God of the uni-

verse” (246). Other scholars have noted that the Bible contains much knowledge of

the earth and its physical qualities, which the people in ancient times had no record

and prior knowledge of. One example of this is the Bible’s knowledge of the ocean’s

deep valleys and towering mountains, though “the people of ancient times thought

the ocean floor was ‘flat, sandy, and bowl-like’” (Halverson 261). Another factor that

gives credibility to the Bible is the surplus of manuscripts that have been found. As of

2009, more than twenty thousand copies of the New Testament manuscripts are in

existence (McDowell 74). This overwhelming amount of manuscripts provides a vast

amount of attestation to the New Testament’s validity.

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Throughout the Old Testament of the Bible there are many references to the messiah, and prophecies about his life. The fulfillment of all these prophecies has been recorded in the New Testament. For example, in Genesis chapter 12, verse 3 it is stated that the son of God will be the seed of Abraham, Jacob, and Isaac. In the first chapter of the first New Tes-tament book, the lineage of Jesus’ family is traced back to Abraham (Matthew 1:1). It is also stated in Isaiah 7:14 that the messiah will be born of a virgin. The New Testament states that God sent the angel Gabriel to “a virgin pledged to be married to a man named Joseph, a descendant of David…the angel said to her, ‘Do not be afraid, Mary; you have found favor with God. You will conceive and give birth to a son, and you are to call him Je-sus’” (Luke 1:26-31). This not only verifies that Jesus was conceived by a virgin, but also solidifies Jesus’ Biblical lineage because it states that Mary was a descendant of David. The Old Testament also prophesizes that the son of God will be pierced through his hands and feet, but none of his bones will be broken (Zechariah 12:10, Psalm 24:20). This was fulfilled the day Jesus was hung on the cross. His hands and feet were pierced with nails, but “when they came to Jesus and found that he was already dead, they did not break his legs. Instead, one of the soldiers pierced Jesus’ side with a spear, bringing a sudden flow of blood and water” (John 19:33-35). There are also very specific prophecies about the mes-siah mentioned in the Old Testament that are fulfilled by Jesus. For example, the Old Tes-tament states that a close friend will betray the messiah in Psalm 41, verse 9 and in Zecha-riah chapter 11, verse 12, it states that this friend will betray the messiah for thirty pieces of silver. In the New Testament accounts, it is written that the disciple Judas betrayed Je-sus for thirty pieces of silver (Matthew 26:14). There are over forty prophecies stated about the messiah in the Old Testament, which are all fulfilled in the New Testament scrip-tures. This provides substantial evidence that Jesus Christ is the son of God. The New Testament scriptures contain not only the account of these prophecies’ fulfill-ment, but also the many miracles Jesus performed that proved he was much more than an ordinary human being. The four gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John are accounts of Jesus’ life, his teachings, miracles and moral practices. These gospels provide testimonies of Jesus healing leprosy, paralytics, the blind, and even raising the dead. In these gospels it is also written that the disciples witnessed Jesus walk on water and calm a storm. Perhaps one of the most inviting characteristics of Jesus from these gospels is the relationship that he had with his apostles. In the gospels Jesus refers to his disciples as friends. “‘Henceforth I call you not servants,’” Jesus says. “‘For the servant knoweth not what his lord doeth: but I have called you friends; for all things that I have heard of my Father I have made known unto you.’” (John 15:15). He also is very patient with them. This is particu-larly seen in his relationship with the disciple Thomas, who would not believe that Jesus resurrected until he was able to thrust his hands into Jesus’ wounds. Jesus replied to him, “Reach hither thy finger, and behold my hands; and reach hither thy hand, and thrust it into my side: and be not faithless, but believing” (John 20:27). The gospels also show that Je-sus was never harmful towards anyone, even those who beat and cursed him. While being tortured on the cross the Bible tells us that he yelled out, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do” (Luke 23:34). These four gospels provide readers with intimate knowledge about Jesus – his own words, beliefs, and life story, which all testify that he is the son of God.

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Many agree with Jesus’ teachings and principles recorded in the gospels, but consider him to be a wise moral teacher rather than the messiah. Well-known author and scholar C.S. Lewis comments on this opinion in his article “What Are We to Make of Christ?” Lewis asks his readers to consider this question based upon not only Christ’s teachings, but also the assumptions Christ makes about himself in the New Testament. Jesus states many times that he is the son of God. After one studies Christ, he/she therefore must conclude that Je-sus is one of three things: the Lord, a liar, or a lunatic (22). It is impossible to view him as merely a moral teacher. As Lewis points out, in Jesus’ time “he produced mainly three ef-fects – Hatred – Terror – Adoration. There was no trace of people expressing mild ap-proval” (23). Lewis also asserts that unlike the other religious figures who have been con-sidered great teachers such as Buddha, Christ is the only one who has claimed that he is God. If people do not believe that Jesus is the messiah, they must conclude that he was either crazy or a liar for saying he was, and either of those assertions would negate any in-terest in following his teachings. Though Jesus is the only religious figure who has claimed to be God, he also is the only one who has claimed to reconcile everyone with God through his death. “Forgiveness has a price,” author McDowell writes in his book, More Than a Car-penter. “God paid that price for our forgiveness through Christ-a payment that Buddha, Mo-hammed, Confucius, or any other religious leader cannot pay” (156). This sacrifice sepa-rates Jesus from all other men in history. He is the only one who willingly gave his life as a living sacrifice for the world’s sin so that the world could be reconciled with God. When it comes to the resurrection of Jesus “the silence of history is deafening in testimony against it” (McDowell 102). In the four gospels of the New Testament it is recorded that though Jesus was sent to Hell for the sins of the world, he rose from the dead three days after his death and then ascended to Heaven. However, Biblical account is not the only evi-dence provided for this resurrection. Many Christians have personal testimonies of how Christ has changed their lives and worked miracles within them, which prove that Jesus is not dead but alive in Heaven. In the Epistle of Ephesians, Paul specifically prayed that the Ephesians would be able to “grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge” (Ephesians 3:18). Paul stressed that it was nearly impossible for one to understand Christ’s love. Like Paul, there are Chris-tians who share their testimonies of how God’s power has worked in their lives so that oth-ers may better understand His love. Consider, for example, notable preacher Reverand Randall Grier. Reverend Randall Grier is a reformed drug addict, criminal, and prisoner. He now travels the world sharing his testimony of how God changed his life. Shortly after his escape from prison, Grier dedicated his life to Christ. He then turned himself in and pled guilty to all five felonies he had against him. Grier writes, “The Bible tells us about the peace of God that passes all understanding. Inside of me I had a peace I couldn’t explain…I knew something good was going to happen, that our Father God would take care of things” (33). Three months later he received a parole, which he was previously told he would never be able to receive, and he knew that “God had supernaturally inter-vened” (Grier 34). Grier’s testimony is an account of the forgiveness Jesus has provided. Today, Grier has fullness of joy and is a husband, father, preacher, and pilot. His story is an inspiring reminder that all things are possible with God, and that Christ’s power is still prevalent in lives today.

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Many people have both doubted and believed in the New Testament’s claim that Jesus Christ is the son of God. However, there is a vast amount of evidence that not only af-firms this claim, but also that Jesus has ascended to Heaven and still has the power to work miracles as he did when he was on earth. Though this topic is still debated and ar-gued about today, there is a large amount of research that verifies the Bible’s credibility and its accounts of Jesus. Biblical evidence and personal testimonies from others such as Randall Grier supply a vast amount of proof for the New Testament’s account of Je-sus’ life. As C.S. Lewis states, it is each individual’s decision to “accept or reject the story” (25). Though there is much evidence for Jesus’ claim to be the messiah, it is ulti-mately each individual’s decision to choose whether they will accept or reject him as the son of God.

Works Cited

Grier, Randall. Escape From Hell. Broken Arrow, OK: RGM Publications, 1991. Print. Halverson, Dean C. The Compact Guide to World Religions. Bloomington, MN: Bethany House, 1996. Print. The King James Study Bible. Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 1975. King James Vers. Print. Lewis, C.S. “What Are We to Make of Christ?” Readings for Meditation and Reflection. New

York: Harper Collins, 1992. 22-25. Print. McDowell, Josh. More Than a Carpenter. Wheaton, IL: Tyndale House, 2004. Print. Sheler, Jeffrey L. Is The Bible True. New York: HarperCollins, 2000. Print.

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“Restored Truth” Exploration and Explanation Making a digital poem is definitely very unique among all the assignments I have been asked to complete as a student. After I saw the examples, I knew this was a project with a lot of potential. I knew that if I was going to invest so much time and creativity into it, I wanted it to be meaningful. There is nothing that means more to me than God and His love for me, so I knew I wanted to dedicate this digital poem to Him. My ideas came from my relationship with Him. I thought back to when I was younger and trusted in God, to when I fell away from Him, and to now how I know Him for what and who He truly is. One memory from my younger years that stuck out most in my mind was when I was seven years old and wrote a letter to God ask-ing Him to help me score a goal at my soccer game. I put the letter outside my win-dow before I went to bed that night, expecting it to be sent up to Heaven. I also kept a journal for many years of my life, where I often wrote letters to God. These were very special moments between God and me, so I knew the best way to show my re-lationship with God would to be through letters in a journal. I actually had the idea of writing the letters out in stop motion, before I wrote the poem – so in a sense the digital aspect of this project actually shaped my poem more than the actual poem itself did. Though at first I wanted my poem to be “epic,” I actually found myself writing a sim-ple poem and using simple digital techniques. I am not even sure if what I wrote could count as a poem? I knew that I would be relying on the digital aspects of the video to make it poetic, and I think this was successful. My poem by itself is not po-etic at all, in my opinion. Because I knew I wanted to write the words out in stop mo-tion, it limited the amount of words within my poem. I knew that my video would be very long if my poem was lengthy, especially because I was using stop motion. Therefore, I kept the language simple. I really loved the digital aspect of this poem, partly because I have wanted to learn more about making and editing videos. After seeing a stop motion example in class, I knew it was a technique I wanted to try. However, this was a VERY time consuming process, and definitely a test of my patience. At times it was so much fun, but at other times it was extremely frustrating. My text was all done in stop motion, be-sides the title and credits. I wanted each letter to God to represent a different age. For example, the first one about falling is from when I was around 6, the soccer one is from around when I was 8, the “thinner” one is from my middle school years, and the last two are from my high school and college years. I tried to match my hand-writing to each age so that it could be conveyed to viewers that I was jumping through time. I chose to use three clips from Passion of the Christ to somewhat break up the sections of the poem, and to further visualize the important aspects of it. My favorite part was writing all the sins on the cover of my notebook, and having them erased after the clip of Jesus on the cross. The red paint dripping down the notebook symbolized Jesus’s blood, which cleanses all our sins (one of my friends, however, thought I was simply pouring ketchup over my project �). This part is my

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favorite because it also is most significant to me because it reminds me of how much God has done for me. I also find it to be the most poetic because there is a lot of sym-bolism in it. I do not directly state that Jesus died for my sins, and that His sacrifice re-deemed my life, but I think that is conveyed through the video and images. The pacing I chose for my video was, in most cases, the fastest I could because I was us-ing stop motion. However, I chose to linger on certain images that I felt people needed more time to soak in. For example, in the part of my video where I write on the journal page “Where has dad been, are you even here?” I stay on that page for about a second or so longer because it is the first moment of the poem in which I doubt God, which is very significant. I kept the transitions to a minimum since this digital poem is somewhat simple. I did not want them to take away from the words of the poem. I only added them when I was transitioning from a notebook page to a video, and I did this because the pacing was so different between the stop motion writing and the video. I felt the transition added more of a balance to the video when changing between the mediums of image and video. The song I chose for this poem was Coldplay’s “Fix You.” I chose this song because there is a huge “turning point” in the instrumental version of it. I felt this matched up perfectly with the turning point of my video, when I show Jesus the clips of Jesus and when I transition back into the journal images—this time written with knowledge of God’s truth. I decided to add the vocals to the video in the last five seconds of it because I thought the line “lights will guide you home” went really well with my digital poem be-cause God is my guide. I also think it fit beautifully with the video of Jesus reaching for the woman’s hand, guiding her back to Him. It was hard to cut this song. I wanted to use the full song – but the song is almost five minutes long and my video was only three and a half minutes long. Therefore I had to cut out many of the beginning and middle chunks. I also wanted the “turning point” of this song to match up perfectly to a certain point in my video, so that took a lot of planning, calculating, and redoing. It also was hard combining the instrumental version of the song with the regular version at the end of my video. I spent a lot of time on it, and when I was done I still saw some minor quirks in the sound that needed to be worked out. However, what I cared about the most (the “turning point” of the song matching up with the turning point of my video) I was able to do so I chose to ignore the other minor mishaps in sound hoping that others wouldn’t pick up on them. There are many similarities and also differences between this project and the various essay assignments I’ve had for English class. Making a video is very much like writing a good essay. A good essay needs to grab your readers’ attention right away, and end on a strong note. The same is true for videos. I am not sure if my digital poem succeeds at grabbing my viewers’ interests at the beginning, but because of how I was structuring my video with the stop action writing, I could not figure out another way to begin my video. I actually put the title at the beginning of my digital poem at last minute. I did this simply because I felt the notebook writing happened too abruptly, and their needed to be a few seconds of silence before the poem and music actually began. There was also a theme

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present throughout my digital poem, similar to how there is a theme present in many writing pieces. It was interesting to notice these parallels while working on the video. It also showed me that my experience as a writer actually helped me in this process. Though writing and video are two different mediums, having experience in one actually helps you with the other. Both are creative ways of expression, but have different strengths. For example, if this project had been strictly a writing piece I would have re-lied very heavily on the writing within my poem and the structure of it – every comma and period would have made a huge difference. However, in the video format these things seemed more trivial, and what was important was expressing the emotions of the poem visually. I did come across a few digital difficulties while working on this project. One was that I did not like using Windows Movie Maker. When I was an undergrad, I used my college’s maclab when I needed to make videos, and I prefer those programs over Windows Movie Maker. What I really disliked about Windows Movie Maker was that it operated very slowly when I imported all my stop motion pictures. I also had to drag them onto my storyboard one by one – for some reason when I pasted them all at once they never ended up in the right order. This was very time consuming, and even more frustrating when you pressed the playback button and realized about three pictures were out of place, which messed up your entire video. Because I do not have Photoshop or a pro-gram like it, the only program I was able to use for image editing was Paint, which is very basic. However, I think it is good that I was somewhat limited since this is my first at-tempt at a digital poem. If I was using more advanced programs I may have been over-whelmed by all the options. Probably what was most difficult for me was the patience required to take each photo for stop motion. It was also very hard for me to keep the camera still. I used a tabletop tripod, since a regular sized tripod was too large for my camera and too high up. However, the tabletop tripod was not well balanced and moved on its own. I therefore had to tape it down to my floor, as well as tape the notebook down positioned in the right spot for the photos. What I found to be crazy was that it would take over an hour to produce one verse of my poem, but that verse would run un-der 30 seconds in the video. When I completed the video and watched it my first thought was, “What? That was only three minutes!” because that seems like such a short amount of time in comparison to the amount of time I spent shooting, compiling, and editing it. I think my digital poem is an example of a poetic video rather than a poem. I like to con-sider the final version of “Restored Truth” to be a draft. While working on this digital poem I was getting my feet wet, testing the waters, and my creative boundaries (though I’m not sure those even exist). Now, I am more prepared to create another, better and more advanced digital poem or video in the future.

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““““In The Moment” StoryIn The Moment” StoryIn The Moment” StoryIn The Moment” Story Your task is to write about an intense moment you experienced. Narrow your story to one focused moment. Some suggestions are, but not limited to, a quick-decision, a life-and-death moment, or a turning point in your life. Refer back to your notes from our “scene vs. summary” exercise before you begin writing. Your story should be a scene that the reader is witnessing. You must use at least one simile and one metaphor in your story. KEEP IN MIND: � This should not be structured as an essay. Do not give us an introduction or an

explanatory conclusion that explains what it is all about. � Use dialogue. This will keep your story in the active, present tense. � Use concrete, specific, and sensory details to represent your situation. This will

help the reader vividly picture the story inside his/her head. � Choose what type of “voice” you would like to write in. Decide, for example, if

you will sound young or wise or ironic or bitter, angry, or energetic, etc! � Pick a title that reflects your story as a whole, or even adds something signifi-

cantly new to it. � Write in either the first or third person narration. Which ever you choose - stick

to it and stay consistent! Do not put too much pressure on yourself for your first draft; writing is a process of revising and editing. We will be reviewing the rough drafts as a workshop of peers, and I will be available for individual writing conferences after school. Remember that revising is a “re vision,” and often writers’ stories change significantly each time they revise them. Your final copy should be free of grammatical errors, 3-5 pages in length, double spaced, 1” margins, 12 point font.

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DDDDigital Poem Assignmentigital Poem Assignmentigital Poem Assignmentigital Poem Assignment Your task is to create a digital poem using pictures and sound. This assignment is designed so that you can express and experiment with your creativity-so have fun! Think back to all that we have discussed during our poetry unit. What literary ele-ments do you like best? How can the “digital realm” help with your poem’s im-agery? You may use a poem you have written in the past, but the poem must be an original, original, original, original, school appropriate piece. You must collect images and music (either instrumental or with minimal vocals) that you feel fit with your poem, and bring them together in a video that represents your poem. Choose things that best express your poem’s emotion and tone. They need not be literal. The words of your poem must be expressed in some way in the video (i.e a voiceover or scrolling words at the bottom of the screen). Experiment and choose what you think works best. This is your chance to push the limits of creativ-ity! This project also includes a write-up about your experience working on your digital poem. This write-up should be at least two pages long. It can and should be written in the informal voice (yes, you can use “I” ☺). The write-up must include:

• How you created the poem you wrote. Where did the inspiration come from?

What motivated you to write this poem? Did the fact that you knew this poem would be “going digital” effect your writing of the poem?

• What choices did you make regarding sound, text, images, video, transitions,

and pacing? How did this affect your poem in a positive and/or negative way?

• What were the difficulties you experienced working in a digital environment?

What did you learn? Is this something you would like to do again in the fu-ture?

• What did you discover new about yourself as a writer throughout working on

this project?

We will be viewing many examples of digital poems within the next few weeks, and I will of course be available after school for individual writing conferences and to address any of your concerns. Above all, express yourself, have fun, and don’t be afraid to push the limits of creativity ☺.

I will be available after school and during lunch to assist you with this process. We will have in class, individual conferences the week of April 25-29.

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Research ProjectResearch ProjectResearch ProjectResearch Project

1. Your task is to write a research paper that compares two characters from two of the novels we have read in class (Little Women, Huck Finn, To Kill a Mockingbird, and Lord of the Flies). Because this is a research paper, your argument must prove a point about the characters and/or novel. The final paper should be about 5 pages, double spaced, 1 inch margins, 12 point font. This is worth 40% of the total project grade.

Here are some comparisons you may consider writing about: -Huck from Sawyer’s Huck Finn and Jo from Alcott’s Little Women -Boo Radley from To Kill A Mockingbird and Jim from Huck Finn -Ralph from Lord of the Flies and Huck from Huck Finn -Jack from Lord of the Flies and Jean from To Kill A Mockingbird -Any other comparison you choose

2. You will also write a series of letters that you imagine would have been shared between the two characters. In these letters they should share their experiences, give one another advice, share the differences about the times they are living, etc. For example, if I were writing letters between Jo and Huck, I would have Jo write to Huck explaining the war, while Huck would write to her about slaves and racism. I would also have Jo write a letter to Huck expressing her anger that she is restricted because she is a woman, while Huck could write about how he hates being treated like a kid. I would also perhaps have Jo send Huck a poem or short story she has been writing. The possibilities are endless, so be creative! Try to get inside your characters mind, what does his/her voice sound like? When is he/she excited, sad, angry, happy? You must write at least five letters from each of the characters, totaling at least ten letters. This is worth 60% of the total project grade

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WWWWriting Magic: Creating Stories That Flyriting Magic: Creating Stories That Flyriting Magic: Creating Stories That Flyriting Magic: Creating Stories That Fly Author: Gail Carson Levine (also author of Ella Enchanted)

ISBN #: 978-0-06-051961-2

OvOvOvOverviewerviewerviewerview:::: Writing Magic is a book designed to help adolescent writers. Levine’s experience as an author of teen fiction novels makes Writing Magic enjoyable for young readers. She divides her book into five sections: “Liftoff,” “Heart and Guts,” “Plowing Through,” “Digging Deeper,” and Writing For-ever.” These sections guide students from topics such as writer’s block, story ideas, and character development into finding your narrator’s voice, dialogue, using sensory details, dealing with criti-cism, and many other writing skills. Levine’s two writer’s rules are 1) always save what you wrote and 2) have fun! She encourages readers be serious about their writing, but also reminds them that writing should be fun. At the close of each chapter, she offers a fun, quick writing prompt for the reader that exercises each technique she describes. Her humor and her friendly tone are both engaging and encouraging for beginning as well as experienced writers.

How This Book Helps Writing TeachersHow This Book Helps Writing TeachersHow This Book Helps Writing TeachersHow This Book Helps Writing Teachers::::

• Because each chapter is short and includes writing prompts, you can pick and choose cer-

tain chapters to share with your students. For example, if you are teaching them about the writing technique showing vs. telling, you can photocopy handouts of Chapter 20 (“Show and Tell”) from Levine’s book and use it as a supplement to your lesson.

• Levine tackles the problem of low self-esteem in chapter 3, titled “Shut Up!” She

encourages writers to silent the “impossible-to-please chatter” inside of their heads. This chapter can be used to help build your students’ confidence as writers

• Levine dedicates a chapter to revision, which she refers to as “the operating room.” She

includes helpful examples of her own revisions from Ella Enchanted that would be helpful to share with your students.

• Chapter 19 “Writers’ Groups and Other Helpers” contains great guidelines for peer editing

that you can use as class rules during writer’s workshop. She also prompts readers with questions to ask as an editor that concentrate on the “big stuff” (e.g. “Does the scene shift to a new location, but you don’t understand how the story got there?”

Samples Writing Prompts from Levine’s book:Samples Writing Prompts from Levine’s book:Samples Writing Prompts from Levine’s book:Samples Writing Prompts from Levine’s book:

Levine includes 30+ writing proLevine includes 30+ writing proLevine includes 30+ writing proLevine includes 30+ writing prompts in her book.mpts in her book.mpts in her book.mpts in her book.

• “Think of a boy and girl you know. Picture them as adults. Imagine they are forced to

marry each other. Write what their lives would be like. Write their dinner-table conversa-tion on their first anniversary” (from chapter 3, “Shut Up!”).

• For sensory details writing practice: “Your main character is participating in a scientific in-

vestigation of a magical object…your character must tell the scientists everything that hap-pens, without skipping a single detail” (chapter 7, “The Nitty Gritty”).

• For practicing method writingmethod writingmethod writingmethod writing: (Levine’s definition: remembering events and feelings in

your own life similar to what your character goes through, though you have never experi-enced the same exact thing). “Your main character is a world-famous inventor of a time-travel machine. To enter his or her persona, think about inspired moments you’ve had. Tell a story from the inventor’s first person POV” (chapter 24, “Method Writing”).

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AppendixAppendixAppendixAppendix

PPPPaper Thin (Draft)aper Thin (Draft)aper Thin (Draft)aper Thin (Draft)

I glance at the clock. 9:48 PM. “Twelve minutes left,” I whisper, dropping the en-velope in my lap. So what if this isn’t the “happily ever after” I saw in all those movies as a young girl? Was I ever cut out to be a Disney princess, anyway? Perhaps this could be my own, distorted happily ever after. I don’t need a Prince Charming to sweep me off my feet or a handsome prince to ride off into the sunset with. I just need someone who loves me. And he loves me. He loves me. I lean my head back against the headrest, tying my coarse brunette curls into a bun. A few curls manage to escape the constraint of my hair tie, sticking to my tear-stained cheeks. “Can I not even control my own hair?” I groan to myself. Frustrated, I pull my hair back again and lean my head into the steering wheel. “This is pointless,” I mutter, sticking the keys into the ignition. But there it is, lying on my lap. The envelope that holds the power to change my fate. A letter I had written in a moment of courage. The letter telling him I want him out of my life for good. But that courage only exists on paper. I can’t feel it within me. Maybe those words are meant to live only in that letter, as a dream of what could have been. Are those words even my true feelings and desires, my needs? Or have I just fooled myself into believing so? What if I never find another person who loves me? Wouldn’t I rather grow old with a monster, than grow old all alone? As a little girl, my favorite part of the year was when my family and I would vaca-tion to Disney world. Though what I loved most about the vacation was running around the parks and taking pictures with Mickey Mouse, I also loved being at the airport, espe-cially the baggage claim area. I would watch the suitcases revolve around and around the airport carousel, just waiting for someone to claim them as their own. Most luggage would be whisked off in a hurry by happy travelers. Others, usually those that had been damaged in transit, were left revolving on the dirty belt, unclaimed. My boyfriend, he had saved me from being that unwanted baggage. I was the damaged goods, and he was the man willing to take them in. He’s right to do the things he does, I deserve them. I’m not good enough for him, I’m blessed to have him. “I can’t give him this letter.” I assure myself, ready to rip the letter in half. But what if, my mind whispers to me. Those words stop me dead in my tracks. The what if’s are always creeping up on me, forcing their way into my mind. They refuse to let me rest. They know exactly how to manipulate me, how to make me cry, make me hate myself, make me hate him. And though I have considered what if’s argument many times, at the end of the day I’m still his object. His ownership. The what if’s are not strong enough to compete against his power over me. “Why can’t I just wake up from this nightmare?” I grumble, throwing the letter onto the passenger’s seat. I glance over to the clock again. 9:55 PM. Five more minutes and then his car will pull up next to mine. In five minutes you will have the opportunity to be courageous and selfish for the first time in your life, my mind tells me. You can be free from this re-lationship. “But courage and selfishness has consequences,” I whisper, grazing my fin-gers over the red marks on my right arm. “I can’t let him do what he did this morning again.”

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Cradling my arm in my chest, I try to stop my mind from remembering the horror that oc-curred just a few hours ago. “Because I’m right! What is it going to take to make you understand that I’m right!” He had shouted at my sister. He was breathing heavily, his nostrils flaring, that look of dark passion was in his eyes. The look that held not only anger, but excitement. Excite-ment to exercise his control, to show everyone he was in charge. I tried to interject. “Listen, she didn’t mean to make you angry. This is all just a misunder-” “Shut up!” He barked at me. “Just shut up!” He turned towards me and grabbed me by the arm, tugging me into him. We were face to face, my whole body trembling. “Please,” I quietly sobbed. “Just calm down-” “I said shut your mouth!” He screamed, his grip getting tighter and tighter, his hot breath burning my tear-stained cheeks. “Stop thinking about it!” I yell, slamming my hands onto the steering wheel. I need to stop myself from getting lost in thought. I can’t allow myself to think of that moment. I just need to block it out, then everything will be okay. “Like it never happened. Don’t worry it never happened,” I tell myself. I have become my own comforter, my only confidant. When had I become so alone? But he has fixed me - my imperfections and all. No one cares for me like he does. What he does to me, it is just his way of showing his love for me, showing that he loves me so much that he is willing to do anything to change me. To change me to become a better person. A person more like him. But you’re not happy, my mind pleads with me. This is not the life you wanted to live, and it’s not too late to make a change. Don’t you believe in yourself anymore? “I do believe in myself,” I whisper, reaching for the envelope once more. “I do.” Lights flash in my rearview mirror. His car pulls into the parking spot behind me. I twist the envelope between my two hands. “This is it,” I whisper to myself, taking a deep breath. My hand touches the car door handle and a shock of electricity shoots through my arms. “Nerves,” I mutter, trying my best to shove them off as I pull the handle into my body. I step out of the car, staring down at the ground, my right hand grasped tightly onto the envelope. “This is it. This is my moment. It is now or never,” I repeatedly assure my-self, walking towards the parked car. We stand face to face, neither of us saying a word. I examine the creases in his forehead, the dark circles under his eyes, the coarse hair on his chin. That look is in his eyes again. The look of superiority, the look that always taunts me saying, “I’m better than you, you’re nothing without me. You don‘t even deserve me.” You don’t deserve him, my mind reminds me. You deserve better. You can do this, just hand him the letter and stay strong- He wraps his icy arms around my body, taking all of my thoughts captive with that one embrace. His two hands meet at the small of my back and pull me in close. I stand lifeless. My right hand grasps onto the letter tighter. I can’t let this embrace take control over me. I need to stay strong. I lift the envelope towards him and begin to speak: “I can’t, I just can’t-” “I love you,” he whispers into my ear. “I love you more than anyone in this world does, and I will love you forever.” I wrap my arms around him, dropping the letter to the floor.

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WWWWavering Reach (Draft)avering Reach (Draft)avering Reach (Draft)avering Reach (Draft)

I understood nothing. Why did He allow this to happen to Him? I had seen Him raise the dead, had this been no different? Why were the people so unjust? Had they not known who He was? ‘He who has ears to hear, let him hear,’ He had told us. Yet while see-ing they did not see; while hearing, they did not hear. Only one week had passed since the last time I had walked this path from Bethpage to Jerusalem, yet so much had changed within that time. I could see the faint remains of the colt’s footprints on the dirt path. The palms were scattered all around, and I could still hear the people joyfully shouting, waving them high in the air. Yet now the palms crunched underneath my sandals, dried up and thirsting in the heat. It was a dry and thirsty land, yet one week ago it had been filled with the living water. We had been surrounded by so much life and joy, it seemed that even the rocks had cried out in praise that day--but now we had nothing. One week ago we had traveled here to bring healing and life to the people. The people who had welcomed Him that day, but cursed and beat Him five days later. Now, I was traveling to hide from them. I hated what they did to Him, how they made Him suffer. But I would do nothing to avenge it. He had prayed for them unto His last hour.

I kneeled down and grabbed a handful of sand from the ground. I poured it be-tween my hands, watching the grains glisten in the sunlight. There must had been hun-dreds of grains in that handful, but all together they were no larger than a stone. If ye have faith as a grain of a mustard seed, I heard faintly, nothing shall be impossible unto you. Was my faith enough to bring back my friend, as His had raised Lazarus? Or had my faith, too, dried out in grief? “Thomas, Thomas!” Peter cried running towards me. “We have seen the Lord!” Could this be true? Had He returned? We are going up to Jerusalem, where the Son of Man will be handed over to the teachers of the Law. They will condemn him to death, He had explained. And then hand him over to the Gentiles, who will make fun of him, whip him, and crucify him; but three days later he will be raised to life. Three days had now passed. Had His promise been fulfilled?

“Thomas, Thomas!” Peter shouted, grabbing me by the shoulders and shaking me. “He came to our hiding place! He is here! He has risen, he has returned!” he shouted at me, expecting me to shout as well. Yet I remained lifeless. I could not erase the image from my mind of Him nailed to his death, the blood and pain that covered His body in scarlet red. I knew what He promised, but I had seen Him defeated by death.

“Come, Thomas!” Peter said impatiently, pulling my arm towards him. “The Lord is here! I have seen Him!”

I ripped his hand off from my arm. “Unless I see the scars of the nails in His hands and put my fingers on those scars and my hand in His side, I will not believe,” I said, sternly. “But Thom-” “No, Peter,” I said, turning to walk away. “Unless I see the scars of his nails in His hands, and put my fingers on those scars and my hands in His side, I say to you, I will not believe.” I headed back towards Bethpage, not looking back. Seven days had passed since Peter had told me that he had seen the lord, and it was now time for me to return to our hideout. Seven long days had passed, yet I still had not seen the evidence. I needed the evidence. The other apostles, they were always so

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sure. Before his death, he had told us that he was leaving to prepare a place for us. What did he mean, “prepare a place?” The other apostles understood, but I had asked, “Lord, we do not know where you are going; so how can we know to get there?” Yet his response was simple. “I am the way, the truth and the life,” he had told me. “No one goes to the Fa-ther except through me.” At that time, I assumed I would go to the Father, because I knew His son. But did I ever truly know him? Was he even the son?

Or was he merely a liar? Were my brothers and I deceived? Yet how could he die, so purely, if a liar? How could we have believed in, so assuredly, a falsehood? Was he a luna-tic? Yet I saw his hands heal the sick, cleanse the lepers, raise the dead. I saw him give to the meek, rise up the humble, and feed the multitudes that starved. I felt his love; I experi-enced his power, his glory, his might. But I also saw his hands and feet nailed down by greater strength. I witnessed the veil collapse. I watched the whips of hatred and scorns of evil. I saw the triumph of death.

I was now approaching the apostles’ hideout. I knocked on the door. “Good morning, Thomas,” John said, greeting me at the door and welcoming me into

the room. They were all gathered on the ground, praying. I walked over to join them. Peter ran towards me.

“Thomas, we have seen him,” he said, grabbing both my hands. “Silence,” one of them said, rising up. “He will see soon. Until then, let us pray.” I tried to pray with them, but my faith was gone. “He has risen! He is alive! Praise to our God!” they were shouting and crying out. I

was no longer one of them. It was all a mistake. This was not my place, this was not my calling, this was not my purpose. But he had chosen me. He had picked me to be one of the twelve he taught and shared his secrets with. But was he still my lord?

The apostles were deep in prayer; they did not even acknowledge my existence. I walked over to the locked doors. Would the authorities be coming to capture us soon? To charge us with penalty, possibly death, for believing that he had been the messiah? Was that a risk worth taking? Did I want to spend the rest of my life hiding out, in fear of death? I did not fear death when I was with him, for I knew he was stronger than death. Yet he had been defeated by death. He did not return as he had promised. There was no one in this room with pierced nails and sides. Only mere humans, rejoicing in the resurrection, though there was no visible evidence. There was only my memory of a broken body and destroyed spirit on the cross. Our lord was no longer here; he had not returned to bring the comfort he promised. My hands grasped the door, pulling it back towards me.

“Who are you!” I gasped, finding a man standing on the other side of the door. “Reach hither thy finger,” he said. I stood motionless, staring at him. “Reach hither thy finger,” he said again. “Behold my hands. And reach out thy hand,

and thrust it into my side.” I stared at him in fear. “Be not faithless,” he said gently, cupping his hand on my shoulder. “But believing.

Reach hither.” I thrust my hands into his side. “Receive ye the Holy Ghost,” he said. “My Lord and my God!” I cried, removing my hands from his wounds and falling to

my knees. “Thomas, because you have seen me, you believe,” He said, wrapping me in His arms. “Blessed are they who have not seen, and yet they believe.”

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