Mike BafundoChildrens Music Dev.Connecting Emotion and MusicWhy does music make us feel a certain way? How does a mathematically arranged collection of sounds cause us to smile, laugh, cry, or simply lose all other thoughts and cares other than what is being played live, in our cars, or in our stereo? Why is it that every time I hear Mary Janes Last Dance I picture my ten year-old self waiting for the school bus on a rainy morning in my dads car? How do musicians respond when the music that they play reaches and surpasses levels of which they desired, or falls short of reaching the level they hoped it would be? Why is it that music has a way of easing your soul and taking away the sting of hard times? Alf Gabrielsson did a study where he gathered over 900 written accounts of peoples most powerful musical experiences, written by a wide variety of music lovers. Within all of these written testimonies, he then looked for connections from all of the accounts. Gabrielsson (2001) talked about how music is known to have reliable effects on listeners emotional states. He said there is more to music than a simple arrangement of notes and wished to dive deeper than what we hear on the surface. In order for myself to find the link between these two entities, I decided that following his basic model would be a good way to gather some outside ideas and views on how music, at least for a moment in time, impacted peoples lives.Through the years, I have had opportunities to meet amazing musicians and music lovers. Fortunately, I have gotten to know people with all sorts of different musical backgrounds, preferences, and ideas of how they identify with music. I wanted to expand upon Gabrielssons study by categorizing the responses into four groups: younger musicians, veteran musicians, younger music lovers, and veteran music lovers. While every person that gave me in an account is unique in their own personal ways, I thought that this would be a good way of seeing where connections would be made from different ages and levels of professional experience. And of course, living in the social media age, I came to realize that Facebook would be the easiest way to contact such a wide range of individuals.When we were infants, music played a big role in all of our lives. Whether it was a nursery rhyme being sung by a family member, or it was a segment on Sesame Street, in some way, music was there for us. As we got older, for some people, music became less of a factor in our lives, while for others (myself included), it became part of how we identify ourselves. In adolescence, we would wear the T-shirts of bands and artists that spoke to our individual selves that would, Portray an image to the outside world, and Satisfy our emotional needs (North, 2000). Tajifel and Turner (1979) described this as social identity theory where people seek to positively evaluate their social identity. In school, you would start hanging out and going to concerts with other people who shared your musical tastes, causing an ingroup, as Tarrant put it, to develop. In fact, a study done by Tarrant (2001) showed that musical behavior is more important to social identity process than other behaviors in media and sport.

The first commonality that I noticed was that most peoples responses that I was receiving would mention someone besides themselves, whether it was a family member, friend, or musical antagonist. The use of the words, We, Us, and Them seemed to appear in almost every account. From one account, a veteran music lover named Wes Poole talked about his first time seeing the Grateful Dead: I was absolutely blown away at the community surrounding the band back then - you could camp out in the parking lot at the show, live on burritos and grilled cheese and no matter your background or upbringing - you could fit in. From another point of view, it was my friend, Brian Parchman recounting the night of his first formal after being accepted into his fraternity at UConn. Billy Joels Piano Man was played through the P.A. at the end of the night: At the end of the year, after overcoming all obstacles and being accepted as a brother, our fraternity held its annual formal. To close the night Piano Man was played for the final song. I watched from afar as every brother instinctively reacted to the first note of the harmonica. They gathered on the dance floor, formed a circled, and swayed to the beat arm-in-arm. Some older brothers who saw us nibs standing back, unsure what to do, and waved us on shouting to join the pack. While these are two completely different scenes on their own, they both are great examples of how Social Identity Theory can positively affect an individual and create a sense of community, regardless of what type of community it is. There seems to be some kind of greater positive force when a group of individuals are all focused on the same moment of a musical piece. One account that I found to support this theory came from Joe LaRosa, a veteran musician who has a long history of playing in big bands, and leads a swing band of his own. His most powerful musical experience came before a Montreal Canadiens NHL playoff game, when Oh, Canada was sung before the puck drop: When they get to the final line Oh Canada, we stand on guard o'er three I'd swear the lyrics were written for the five Canadiens standing shoulder-to-shoulder at their own blue line. Always thought opponents were down a goal before the puck was dropped. So when a group of individuals are joined together by a certain artist or song, does it make them each emotionally stronger? I personally think so. It doesnt matter if its an arena full of hockey fans singing their National Anthem, 10,000 deadheads going to see their most beloved band, or a group of fraternity brothers drunkenly singing Piano Man after a party, music gives us something positive to form our own community around, and turn a group of individuals into a much larger, powerful, and more emotional entity.After receiving more responses, I noticed another common trend between veteran and younger musicians, this being the live performance. Whether it was empowering or humbling, I saw similarities in how the individuals would react to the situation. This made me think back to the topic of goal theory. In the accounts I have received, I have seen many examples of goals being approached, from personal to social, academically driven to mastery driven, and even some that start out as academic, but are taken over by personal and social aspects. Wentzel and Wingfield (1998) talk about how social goals (playing with peers) tend to have more of an impact on younger musicians with the support of their friends, something that I found to relate more to, but from what I have seen in some accounts, sometimes personal goals become achieved for the purpose of others, adding a social aspect to the performance. Sometimes when a musician is playing a piece for academic purposes, the environmental and mental state theyre in takes over and causes them to forget that they are performing this piece for a grade, and rather perform for the sake of performing. Schubert (1996) talks about the importance of how both positive feelings (associated with belonging) and negative feelings (associated with rejection) are vital to an adolescents growth. While most of the accounts I received are from individuals occurred after adolescence, I like to think that musicians, especially younger ones, are in a constant state of musical development throughout their lives.For me personally, there is no greater feeling than playing in a band and creating something that goes beyond our own expectations. There have been those days where everything felt just right, almost to the point that you couldnt make a mistake if you tried, and even if you did, someone else would go with you and something new and fresh would come out of it. To me, these are the ultimate emotional high points of performing music. In the accounts I have received, some talk about their moments of triumph and how it made them feel. Chris Depino, a veteran chromatic harmonica player, talks about practicing and playing in the Czech Republic in front of the Prime Minister and ambassadors: I was scared. I had no idea how all this would turn out. I went to the rehearsal in the afternoon and I was blown away' on the difficulty and complicating nature of the music. But I was focused on success for myself and when it came my turn to play I did. Not very well. But I did. I left the rehearsal hall and went straight to my hotel where I practiced for the entire rest of the afternoon. Finally, the evening arrived and I was welcomed on stage in front of all these people and it was my turn to play with the band. I did it. I did it flawlessly and effortlessly. It was surreal, almost like I was the vessel for the notes and they played themselves. From another point of view, a younger classical pianist, Michelle Lee, talks about learning and performing her repertoire in high school. She describes the learning aspect as being negative, but the performance made it worth the effort: Negative: Learning my biggest piece senior year of high school, which took me about 3 months to learn and memorize (impatience, frustration, when-will-it-ever-end). Positive: Performing it! (Felt rewarded, free/liberated by how playing the piece, after much practice, felt like second nature; was very emotionally connected to the piece via its dynamics) It was a Chopin piece (Andante Spianato and the Grande Polonaise, Op. 22) and it's a very up and down kind of piece that felt like a huge journey. Always smiled and felt relief and also pride when finishing that piece with a bang. Again, I saw the nervousness and fear being washed away once the performance started. In these two instances, the frustration and self-doubt is completely removed from your mind once it is time to play. These personal goals are achieved, resulting in a feeling of pure joy.The most powerful example of meeting ones personal goals came from my former roommate and classical pianist, Mathieu Dunoyer. He was performing his graduation recital two days after our friend, Mikey, had passed away: As I played in front of family and friends that were all still in mourning, I felt the presence of Mikey right next to me as if he was there to reassure me that everything I'm doing is good. I played through a heavy and emotional piece in the beginning. Half way through, my emotions started to get the best of me and I didn't know how I would manage to get through this 20 min piece. I pushed and stayed in character until it was done. After hitting the final d minor chord I was in tears and couldn't find the energy to bow and get my s*** together. I took a 10 minute break before continuing the performance. I pushed through and played some of the best I've ever played.When the concert was over, I performed an encore for my buddy. It was a Scriabin Poem that illustrated going up into the heavens. As I played it, the audience was in tears but I held my own and expressed my tears and pain in the music. The recital was no longer academics, but was rather for the purpose of playing for Mikey, since its what he would have wanted. He was not playing for himself, but rather for Mikey and all of our friends and family who were still very hurt. While there is nothing like the thrill of victory, there is also nothing like the bitter taste of defeat. All musicians have had experiences when the level of which they are playing falls short of where they desired it to be. It is how they react to the situation that can take a humbling and confidence lowering moment, and make it into a positive learning experience. Classical composer and fellow Grants Tomb member, James Sheppard, was in high school, and had just been accepted into the Manhattan School of Music Pre-College program as a classical pianist and trumpet player. He talks about his humbling experience on his first day of classes. He heard someone flawlessly playing the piece he had prepared, and was surprised when he opened the door to see an 8 year-old mastering the piece that he had worked so hard on: This eight year old could play better than me, and her feet couldnt even reach the pedals. I missed all of my morning classes and stayed in the bathroom too embarrassed to leave. This was a powerful musical experience, I was ultimately humbled. It was the day I realized I would never be a concert pianist, that dream finally left me. Luckily soon after, I realized I had what it takes to compose! got me back on my feet. Another account of turning a humbling experience into a learning experience comes from Mark Mercier, veteran keyboardist from the legendary jam band, Max Creek He was taking an Early Music Workshop (Renaissance era), and was having trouble playing a certain piece: So I had this piece, I don't remember by who, but I played it, and Iadone (professor) stopped me and said "no no -- you have to make it beautiful". So I played it again, with feeling, and he said NO - you have to make it beautiful! Did it again, and the same thing. He got more frustrated, as did I, and so he sat at the piano, and played it, and it absolutely came to life. I sat down, and finally SAW - and did it, and I think he said "YES" or something like that. But I do remember that all of a sudden an incredible door opened, and music was never the same after that. In both cases, the musicians were able to take what could have been a frustrating and negative experience, and turned it into a moment of musical enlightenment. For James, it was about learning that he wasnt the cocky double major that he thought he was going to be. But out of the pre-college program, he discovered that he has an amazing gift and strong passion for composition. Mark found what it meant to use beauty and play more than just with feeling, but to play the music.One more example of a musician taking what could have been a negative experience, and turning it into a positive learning comes from veteran drummer Bill Carbone of Max Creek, Z3, and various other bands. Bill talks about playing in a late night jam session at Jungle Jam, a festival in Costa Rica. He explains dealing with getting vibed (judged) from another musician when stepping in on drums: So I went over and played floor tom while she stood up and then transitioned to kit without stopping the groove. Right away Tony Hall, one of the bass players, starts yelling at me to play louder Im hitting as hard as I can. He leaves me alone. About 5 minutes later he comes over and says he wants to play drums. So I give him the sticks. He sits down, and plays the dumbest, simplest, loudest, and funkiest beat ever. It was so simple, direct and crushing. It hit me immediately what louder meant to him: Not so much volume as emotional intensity, which was the thing I wasnt bringing It wasnt a shining moment as a performer, but it was a great one as a musician because I took it to heart. Some of my friends on stage have expressed that they thought he was being uncool that night to people, but Im happy to take it as a music lesson. The best part is Ive been hitting way harder ever since and Im looking forward to the chance sometime in the future to hit him right in the face with some big a** quarter notes. From what I saw in the accounts, there were great examples of Schuberts (1996) ideas of how both positive and negative experiences of both acceptance and rejection, is important for the growth of musicians. It all has to do with how we deal with the rejection. Just imagine what would happen if Charlie Parker quit when he was 13 and had a ride cymbal thrown at him during a jam session.From the other side of performance comes the audiences point of view. I can recall countless times I have been to a concert and have been absolutely blown away. I remember seeing my first Grateful Dead off-shoot band, The Other Ones, with my parents when I was 12 years-old. After that show, I was filled with curiosity and ambition to play music. More specifically, I wanted to play the kind of music where I could be free to improvise and explore with other musicians, which led me to studying jazz. John Dewey (1938) said, Experience arouses curiosity, strengthens initiative and sets up desires and purposes. To me, there is no other experience like seeing a live performance and having your mind blown. For a friend, and younger music lover, Danielle Kalman, hers was seeing Roger Waters perform The Wall: We got there, ran from the car to the building to our seats, and the MOMENT we sat down the lights went out. Seconds later, 'In the Flesh' started. And I sat in my seat watching my favorite music play out right there in front of me and I cried, out of sheer happiness. It honestly felt like every previous moment in my life had just been there for the purpose of leading up to that one right there George Porter Jr., a beyond-funky bass player, and founding member one of my all-time favorite bands, the Meters shared his most powerful musical experience involving he and a 10 year-old guitar player named Brandon Niederauer while watching Stanley Jordans solo guitar performance at Jam Cruise: Stanley was doing a solo performance in one of the smaller rooms on the boat, the room was full of people, Musicians and fans including 10-year-old Brandon who sat on the floor right in front of him for the whole one hour performance. At one point Stanley Jordan took a solo with his left-hand and then, he added a second solo with his right hand simultaneously while he was still soloing with his left hand, there were lines that started in one hand and finished in the other also lines that had harmony's, I almost lost my mind, it was so amazing. Right then I looked down at this kid, Brandon who was three or four people in front of me. He had been sitting up the whole time but at this moment he laid his head down in his fathers lap and looked up at Stanley as if to say, where did that come from? lol. I know I was losing my mind with respect and awe, I can't imagine what was going through Brandon's head, but it was more then we both could hold on too at that brief moment in time, damn. Where did that come from? to me, is the essence of what Dewey is talking about when he talks about the Experience. Seeing an artist playing two different lines on a guitar at the same time, and blowing away both young musician and veteran musician is something that can only happen in a live setting. The final connection that I saw from all of the responses dealt with the power that music has to heal the soul. Oteil Burbridge is another of my all-time favorite bass players, who is a member of the Allman Brothers Band, founding member of Aquarium Rescue Unit, and has been part of countless other projects. He was kind enough to share his account of his most powerful musical experience, which turns out isnt a single moment, but a re-occurring experience: One of my most powerful musical experiences is actually every time I get to play the banjo. I have played electric bass my whole career and do not play upright bass. My wife's banjo was the first in depth foray for me into the world of acoustic music My wife works in extremely dangerous parts of Africa as a Gorilla conservationist. When she is in the bush in the Congo, Rwanda or Uganda with dangerous rebel groups hiding out in the rain forests I may be out of contact with her for a week or more at a time. At first it was almost impossible to deal with emotionally. The fear was so great, and totally justified since the men that protect her in the jungle get killed on a regular basis. Over 140 trackers/rangers have been murdered in the last ten years. Some very recently. The guy that took her on her first baby Gorilla rescue just got shot in the stomach 4 times a couple of weeks agoI picked up her banjo in a time of overwhelming fear and found not only did it help me dispel fears of things totally out of my control, but eventually reached a state of mind in which I truly felt that no matter what happens, ultimately, everything is gonna be ok. It was the most profound sense of peace I have ever felt There is something in the rich overtones of acoustic instruments that is meditative, healing and joyful. I am no longer searching for this elusive thing we call happiness or peace of mind. My mom, Nancy Bafundo, also sent me her account of how music can ease the soul. When my high school band director, (who was an amazing bass player as well) Mr. Stevens, was in the hospital diagnosed with Leukemia, my friends and I decided to go to the cancer wing with our instruments and his bass and jam with him. My mom is a nurse and was helping Mr. Stevens while in the hospital: The most memorable moment that music impacted me was when it helped me to heal what was an extremely painful time in my professional and personal life. As a nurse I care for many patients at the end of life and use medications and a variety of technical tools to help them get through painful times. I also try to separate my professional from personal life as much as I can. This one time a good friend who happened to be a musician and a music teacher was a patient who was within weeks of passing and required a blood transfusion. I recall how much he enjoyed and rallied when his students came into jam with him in the hospital and performed for the oncology unit for the other patients. I still smile and tear up seeing him in a surgical mask banging it out on his bass with his students, while other patients who could barely sit up normally, asked to have their doors opened so that they could enjoy the music as it danced through the hallways and throughout the nursing unit that was now made sunny and joyous that afternoon. Music heals the soul and it still makes this sometimes tired old nurse smile as I reflect back on what it did that day for them and for me. Music has a way of easing your soul and taking away your worries. When a baby is crying, sometimes all a parent has to do is sing a lullaby to ease their worries. I remember riding in the car with my dad after getting a detention. (I cant remember what I did, but Im sure it was something pretty stupid) I remember him yelling at me, calling me all kinds of colorful words, deservedly, until Here Comes the Sun came on the radio. After about a minute into it, he took a deep breath and apologized for all but one thing he called me. But I remember the feeling of this giant weight being lifted off my chest when the song started. Whether youre going through hard times in your life, are dealing with the loss of a friend or loved one, or even if you have just had a rough day, music can take away the sting and make put you in a state of ease.After reading all of these accounts and trying to make sense of it all, I see how much of an impact music has on a wide variety of people. As a music educator, I need to not only focus on the cognitive aspect of it, but the emotional as well. Behne (1997) argues that the reason that many music programs arent flourishing is because of too much focus on the technical area of music, and not enough on the emotional side. I agree with Behne in the way that there is not enough attention being paid to the pure aesthetic of music. I feel that some students begin losing an interest in music because they see it as another class like math, when there is so much more creativity and emotional content being neglected. While I do agree that the cognitive aspect should be taught to younger students, the emotional aspect needs to be prevalent to allow children to creatively express themselves. Webster (2002) talks about how enabling conditions (environment, personality, motivation) and enabling skills (craftsmanship, understanding of theory, musical aptitudes) go hand in hand to develop a students creative thinking. In that sense, I would think that emotion fits in with enabling conditions, which will shape the students creative ability. After seeing all of these connections from such a wide variety of musicians and music lovers, it seems that age, talent level, and background have little to do with each other when feeling emotion in music. We may be individuals, but we all feel the same emotions, and music holds a place in all our hearts. While the stylistic preferences of music may vary, all genres of music contain elements of joy, sadness, comfort, and awe. Hearing Levon Helm sing Anna Lee brings me to the same level of beautiful sadness as when I hear Otis Redding sing Ive Been Loving you too long. Scarlet Begonias takes me to the same state of pure happiness as Hey Pocky Way. And Trey Anastasios guitar solos can blow me away the same way that Freddie Hubbard can on the horn. George Porter Jr. said in his account, Music can make you happy, music can make you cry, music can definitely make you wonder, where the hell did that come from?? Smile.

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