Emma Bellemy - Living with Juno

8/20/2019 Emma Bellemy - Living with Juno

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About the Author

After thirty years as a high flying business executive for

international corporations, Emma Bellemy decided to part

company with her American Express Gold Card, and jet set

life-style, in favour of eeping sheep and growing grapes in!evon" #he abandoned the $Good %ife& when the call came

to advise big businesses on using their resources to help

charities and community projects" 'ow, Emma lives (uietly

as a writer between her homes in #ligo on the wild west

coast of )reland, the Cotswolds in the *+ and her

farmhouse in Brittany"


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or ayley, who waved her magic wand, and for

George"


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mma Bellemy

L

IVING

W ITH

J

UNO


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Copyright . Emma Bellemy /01234

5he right of Emma Bellemy to be identified as author of this

wor has been asserted by her in accordance with section 66

and 67 of the Copyright, !esigns and 8atents Act 2977"

All rights reserved" 'o part of this publication may be

reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any

form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying,

recording, or otherwise, without the prior permission of the

publishers"

Any person who commits any unauthori:ed act in relation to

this publication may be liable to criminal prosecution and civil

claims for damages"

5his is a wor of fiction" 'ames, characters, places, and

incidents either are the product of the author&s imagination or are used fictitiously" Any resemblance to actual persons, living

or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental"

A C)8 catalogue record for this title is available from the

British %ibrary"

)#B' 96726733;


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Acnowledgments

?ith fondness, love and grateful thans, you all

now who you are"


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1 – Sometimes ... you have tomake a dash for it

>y route to meeting anie uno began when ) accepted a

job offer for a responsible but dull position in 5aunton, the

county town of #omerset in the #outh ?est of England,

famous for its cricet"

) was living an uninteresting suburban existence in thesame ?est >idlands city )&d been born into almost forty

three years earlier, a place that had been on the wane since

its heyday of once being compared car wise to !etroit, and

when an escape hatch of opportunity suddenly popped

open, ) swam for it lie a spawning fish"

Being a baby boomer from #cottish immigrant parents,

) was part of a generation that had been well educated andgiven opportunities which had allowed me to climb the

career ladder from a relatively young age" By the time )

was in my late thirties ) had reached a level of seniority that

had surprised me and ) was, by a long way, the youngest

executive at my current company" ) lived and wored

conscientiously and dutifully and was viewed both by my

family and colleagues as a reliable pair of hands a

hardworing cog in the domestic and corporate machinerywho had none of the undesirable traits of spontaneity or

irrationality"

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)&d applied for the new role in the #outh ?est with its

eye watering salary on a whim from 5he Appointments

section of The Sunday Times not really expecting to get it

but a few months on, having scraped through the interview process by the sin of my teeth because of the nine points

on my driving license a near ban and a story for another

day ) found myself flat hunting with a short list of criteria

for my perfect location"

Dver a wet weeend in early anuary, )&d pinpointed

Exeter and made an offer on a waterside apartment with

views across a small boat yard to the (uay which allowedme to hear the claning of the halyards in the wind and the

caws of the sea gulls overhead" 5ogether with the salty

whiff from the water, it gave me a sense of the all-

important living near the sea"

#everal of those around me were privately very

concerned about my bid for freedom including my current

female boss Barbara who we more commonly referred to asBattle-Axe Babs" #he was a no-nonsense unmarried shrewd

operator who&d fought her way to the top only to hear the

death nell of retirement which was proving to be a more

slippery opponent than anything she had seen off in her rise

through the rans"

#he was a big woman with a penchant for flowery

blouses and elasticated waists which gave her an air of

nostalgic reassurance, engineered to conjure up fondmemories of how our grannies used to treat us" Dn her part,

this was a carefully cultivated illusion to mae us wor

hard to gain her praise but more importantly, it signalled

that we could confidently spill our guts and she used the

information gleaned to da::ling effect" )t was clear to me,

though not to everyone, that it had provided her with the

political leverage to manoeuvre herself into a position thatwas practically unassailable, except for the small matter of

the looming enforced retirement"

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Barbara was clever alright but ) always felt she

afforded me a little more respect, guessing rightly that ) had

sussed her out, and whilst we&d never be e(uals she was

mostly direct in her dealings with me" ) say mostly becauseshe was an operator after all" 5he word was out that she

was more than a little exasperated by my desire to hurl

myself onto the rocs and towards the end of my notice

period she too me to one side"

er en(uiry began with a $can you step into my office

please& but ) sensed it wasn&t to do with the standard of the

wor from the division ) headed so ) hastily tuced a strandof my blonde bobbed hair behind my left ear, too off my

blac rimmed glasses and followed her"

Dnce inside she ased me to close the door and tae a

seat, gesturing to the leather sofa against the wall" )t was

late on a riday and she&d taen her shoes off so ) thought it

only polite to do the same" As we sat on the sofa /trying to

ignore each other&s blac scuff mars that shoes leave onyour tights, s(uashed up toes and faint cheesy odours that

were gaining in strength4 she came to her point"

$Gina, ) now this is a really big move for you so

how&s it going )&m guessing by the loo of you that it&s all

under control as usual and your things are neatly stowed in

labelled boxes" )&m right aren&t )&

#he sounded almost motherly"

) too a deep breath and tried to convey an air of being

organised when ) new that, as far as my $really big move&

went, all ) had in fact were two retro #pace 2999 bar stools,

a wicer laundry hamper and three ubi(uitous abitat

storage jars with round lids, having left everything else

with the ex"

$Dh you now, lots to do, but the lists are slowly

dwindling"&

5here were no lists"

$ow are the boys taing it&


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#he was referring to my sons aged sixteen and

eighteen"

$College and university becon so we&ve agreed they&ll

stay with their dad and visit,& ) replied neutrally to gloss

over the fact that )&d turned myself inside out before finally

concluding it would be in their interests"

$!id you buy your new furniture and arrange for the

moving man&

) pretended to study her career photos on the wall while

) bought time to let my voice drift upwards in search of a

level of cheer ) didn&t feel"

$Dh yes, everything&s ready,& ) s(ueaed" $All good to

go, ) thin you would say"&

As there was no furniture, there was no man and )

would be porting my stuff in the bac of a small >ercedes,

just to give you an idea of how little there really was"

$Fou&ll be missed around here for sure Gina but notwishing to cast blac clouds on your """ um, little adventure

shall we say, if you find the change too disorientating,

please give me a ring and we&ll sort something out,& she

said silily"

>y blood began to boil and when she leant over and

patted my arm, ) jumped lie )&d accidentally been poed

with an electric cattle prodder" ) new all of this was down

to the problem she was having in replacing me andreasoned that her words had been carefully chosen in order

to noc my confidence whilst her indly pat and taing

her shoes off were displays to mae we waver between

stable security and the dangerous unnown" ?hen my

number seven on the ichter scale of seismology had

subsided, ) gathered myself and replied neutrally, $5hans

Barbara, that means a lot,& though in reality ) new wildhorses would never drag me bac once )&d left"

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#he signalled the conversation was over by standing up

and s(uee:ing her puffy feet bac into their extra wide

blac patent shoes before returning to her side of the des"

$emember what ) said, Gina, always here to help"&

er smile was one of self-serving indulgence and her

message of $stay with what you now& was intended to

instil doubt and confusion" )f she was closer to the truth

than she realised that was my business and a lifelong career

in one place might be fine for her but wasn&t for me" 'o

thans dearie and if becoming a Battle-Axe Babs was all )

had to loo forward to, ) might as well chuc the towel innow"

5o my credit, )&d anticipated and rehearsed for this

moment and the loo ) had settled on was a ulia oberts

$Boudicca on the chariot, hair in the wind, ) will triumph&

ind of thing wearing a 5ina 5urner >ad >ax <

impregnable $nothing can stop me now& breast plate" )

hoped Babs had appreciated it but wasn&t so sure when allshe did was to raise one of her pencilled in eyebrows"

5ime for me to go"

'ot retreat"

ust go"

Go #outh"

er chat had only made me more determined to mae a

success of it, hinting as she had that it might be a step too

far" A few relatives by marriage and some of my more

$settled& colleagues had echoed the same sentiment, but as

their motives were also (uestionable ) had chosen to set

them aside too"

)t wasn&t a fear of the unnown that had stopped my

own parents leaving the tenements of Glasgow in search of

a better life and ancestry was on my side if they couldovercome fears and doubts then ) could too" )n an

increasingly swelling sea of negative opinion the people

around me could not understand"

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)t wasn&t possible for me to stay"

)t wasn&t possible for me to come bac"

) was convinced that once away from this faded, jaded,die hard conurbation and living somewhere exciting and

stimulating, ) could shae off the grey moribund treadmill

of my life and grow a different one that was filled with new

friends, new distractions and happy times" %ie a plant, )

wanted sunshine, clean air and access to water to allow the

new shoots of my exodus to blossom and thrive" ) didn&t

see myself as a needy hot house weeping fig but as

something outdoorsy, exotic and compact lie a ebewhich is easy on the eye and flowers occasionally" )t also

happens to be true that in Gree mythology, ebe is the

name of the Goddess of Fouth"

) rest my case"

5he day eventually came, not too long after my Battle-

Axe Babs encounter, when it was indeed time for me to

pac up and fly south" ) received flowers, gifts and goodluc wishes, said my goodbyes and without a bacward

glance headed down the >3" ittingly, ) left grey sies in

the >idlands and arrived in lovely spring sunshine"

) first caught a glimpse of anie uno /though ) didn&t

yet now her name4 as ) was unloading my meagre

possessions and spotted her waling along the pavement on

the other side of the road" er shortish light brown hair,curling slightly outwards, bounced as she stepped lightly

and her flouncy sirt swayed gently from side to side" #he

looed over and smiled warmly maing it easy for me to do

the same and my impression was one of loose familiarity,

as if ) might have seen her somewhere before" 5he idea

departed as (uicly as it had arrived and when she turned

the corner out of sight ) wondered if she lived in the same

apartment bloc"

5he next day ) decided to explore my surroundings and

the first thing ) noticed was how bright everything was"

Granted, it was a clear sunny day but ) was instantly taen

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with the sharpness of the extraordinary light" A gentle wind

furrowed the water and the slight wave tops glistened

silver" 8eople were milling around appreciating the day,

eating ice-creams and stopping at waterside cafes"Everyone appeared relaxed and small children laughed

excitedly" ?ith some surprise, ) had to root around for my

sunglasses, such was the luminosity"

And it was warm"

) found an unoccupied seat at a cafe called >angoes,

ordered a cappuccino and removed my thic woollen

jumper" 5he sun was strong enough to heat up my sin and) could feel it radiating" 5he water must have reflected it

too and, given this was only the middle of April it was

unheard of, at least for me, to be almost sunbathing"

) revelled in it"

5he coffee arrived and as ) too in the happy scene of

people enjoying themselves against the (uayside bacdrop,

) exhaled deeply" A little more than )&d intended because itmade an odd gurgling sound and the man at the next table

peered at me (uestioningly" ) raised my eyebrows by way

of apology but from the moment of my spontaneous

exhalation, my tensions began to ease"

$Excuse me but are you alright& next table fifty

something man ased me in an anxious tone"

$Erm, yes thans" ) have a bit of a cold, )&m afraid"#orry about that"&

Good (uic thining"

$)t always happens when the seasons change, but these

occasional sunny days coming early lie this are gifts from

the winter god, don&t you thin&

is accent had a hint of !evon drawl and he smiled

with an easy charm" ) noticed the eyes beneath his thic,fair fringe were brown and friendly and he had a boyish

way of turning slightly away from you, then lowering and

tilting his face upwards when he spoe" )t made him appear

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shy which was attractive as well as endearing, if not a little

practiced for my taste"

$)&m >axwell, >ax, how do you do& e proffered his

hand and ) shoo it lightly, feeling the sin dry and not too

soft"

$ello >axwell->ax, )&m Gina" 8leased to meet you,& )

smiled bac"

) couldn&t help it"

$5he rowers are having a good outing today" )&ve been

watching them practice and compete" )t&s fascinating" ) usedto do a bit in my time but those days are long gone" ow

about you, have you ever rowed&

$>e& ) spluttered into my coffee, blowing some of the

foam onto his grey cashmere jumper"

e too it well, dabbing himself off with the paper

napin that he hastily grabbed from beneath his saucer and

laughed, showing a decent set of teeth that ) too to be hisown"

$%isten, >axwell->ax, where ) come from, the nearest

you get to rowing is your fiver&s worth on the boating pool

in 5he >emorial 8ar" 5wo laps and your number&s called

in" By loud hailer"&

$Fou loo lie you could do it, Gina" 5he rowing club

is just over there"&

e pointed to a single storey bric building across the

(uay with huge doors onto the water which happened to be

two hundred yards from my place"

$5here&s a class for novices starting on ?ednesday"

?hy don&t you give it a try )&ll be there and can show you

the ropes, well blades actually"&

) must have looed asance because he added hastily,while putting a reassuring hand on my bac ) noticed, that

blades were oars" >y relief was instant and palpable" e&d

leaned forward when he spoe and together with the hand

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action ) got the impression that his complete focus was on

me, to the exclusion of all else" 5hat day ) was flattered but

in time ) would come to realise that it was a bedside

manner he had perfected for the benefit of his clients in hisrole as a senior partner in a %ondon-based law firm his

speciality being commercial property"

$Get there for ="axwell->ax"&

$Bye Gina" %oo forward to it"&

e stood up when ) did and shoo my hand again" or

a second, ) thought he might try to iss my chee but when

the moment passed, ) wondered if ) had imagined it" )

reflected on our exchange as ) waled along the (uayside

and thought how easily he had scaled my carefully

constructed and heavily fortified battle-weary defences, the

ones that made ort +nox loo lie a chicen coop" ) was

no newcomer to male charm but my experiences were

largely in the course of my wor and whilst ) had managed

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>ax&s attention professionally, outwardly appearing calm

and relaxed, inside ) was having ittens"

e was silled if he could mount a challenge in a

matter of minutes that had me saying yes, yes and yes but

on the plus side, he might be able to help me settle into the

area because of his obvious resources and contacts" >y best

bet was to eep him as an arm&s length $friendly

professional& and ) was relieved when ) settled on this as a

label for the tone of our dealings" ) re-secured my defences

and when ) saw that the little rope ferry was open ) paid the

01p fare and stepped aboard">inutes later ) was on the opposite side of the (uay

strolling across the main s(uare when ) caught another

glimpse of anie uno with a dar haired girl as they waled

past the big window of the )talian bar"

#he was laughing at something and turned just at the

moment a sunburst caught her hair and gave it a halo effect"

) blined at the tric of the light and shielded my eyes so )could see better but she had already disappeared inside"

Coincidentally, later that evening ) received a message

welcoming me to the area, also mentioning the owing

Club and saying that she would be there on ?ednesday if )

was free"

%ater on, as ) lay in my strange bed in my strange

room, ) felt the first glow from the embers of new

beginnings being gently fanned by the experiences of the

last few days" >y face was hot and smooth from the

glorious weather and ) felt proud ) had made two new

contacts, both of whom were steering me towards the

possibility of doing something that was both outdoors and

mercifully, involved being close to the water" A little closer

than ) had imagined as it would turn out but when these

thoughts tricled through my mind, the ?est >idlands began to seem lie a lifetime away"

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2 – Sometimes ... you have to hold your hands up and play the game

By lunchtime on the first day of my new job, ) new ) had

made a grave mistae when ) realised that my colleague,

reddie the inance !irector, was a misogynistic

psychopath who was entirely ungovernable by the CED

/who was my boss too4"

5his was a world that >ax was familiar with and because of the seriousness of the matter, ) didn&t feel he

would loo upon my call as a come-on" ) needed his

professional advice and nothing more, ) tried to convince

myself as ) began to dial his number"

$i, >ax, it&s Gina"&

$) was just thining about you"&

e sounded pleased and ) thought, Hwere you nowI but let him go on"

$ow did the first day go&

$Jery illuminating, >ax, is all ) can say"&

) heard him suc in his breath"

$)nterestingly, when ) went through all the hoops of the

recruitment process, ) was never introduced to the ! and

now ) now why" )&d ased several times for a meeting withhim but for one reason or another it had never been possible

and in retrospect ) feel ) was fobbed off"&

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) heard him groan as if he already new what ) was

going to reveal"

$Gina, who managed the project before you&

$Good (uestion" >y 8A, #usie, told me her name was

Amanda" #he had been good at her job and was about the

same age as me" #usie also told me in confidence that in her

opinion Amanda had been reduced to a near nervous

breadown and was sure some ind of payoff had been

affected" #he had seen a non-disclosure agreement"&

$>ore lie a gagging order,& he chimed in"

$) might be in the proverbial merde, >ax"&

$) didn&t now you spoe rench,& he laughed but now

wasn&t the time to tell him )&d slaved in Brussels for five

years"

$Fou&re going to need to eep your wits about you

girl"&

$) now" )t already feels that what should be astraightforward nuts and bolts project role is taing on the

dynamics of the e(uivalent of a

minute of the day" e&s tried to ambush me several times

already and it could be exhausting" ) tell you, >ax, the

politics of both the organisation and its networ of

associate companies could trump ?estminster any day and

) recon progress has been slow as well as expensive

because of the sheer resources needed to mae a dent on theinstitutionalised cronyism"&

$Fou don&t strie me as being a shrining violet, Gina,

but you might be advised to eep your head down"&

$As far as the earth&s core at this rate,& ) (uipped and he

laughed again"

$8sycho-reddie has definitely got issues and you need

to play the long game until you can find an Achilles heel"&

is tone was matter of fact and scarily pragmatic but )

new he was right" &And besides, you&ve got your rowing

on ?ednesday and that might help"&

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) failed to see how but as my life by the sea was

changing at a rate of nots, the best thing ) could do was to

tread water and go with the tides" 'o puns intended"

?e said our goodbyes and after he made me promise to

go to the club, ) rang off" ?ith my phone still in my hand, )

sat on my space 2999 bar stool and looed out into the

darness across the water" Dn the other side of the (uay )

could pic out the illuminated spire of the old church and

the swaying fairy lights of the bars" ) put the phone on the

wortop and looed at it thoughtfully" >ax was right and

had definitely been the person to tal to but ) still couldn&thelp wondering what on earth )&d done in taing the job in

the first place"

) raided my fridge for some humus and momentarily

reflected on how nice it was to be free to suit myself with

what and when ) ate, remembering my ex and our set meal

times" And now, because ) only munched when ) was

hungry, ) had lost weight and it added to my pleasure of themoment"

eturning abruptly to my little wor problem, the

words of Battle-Axe Babs rang in my ears and for a split

second ) conceded that ) might actually have bitten off

more than ) could chew" ) had to (uicly reinforce that

going bac was an impossibility and consoled myself with

the fact that it was still early days" %et&s see what

?ednesday would bring"

And unlie the previous night, ) didn&t go to bed

glowing" ) went instead with a gnawing anxiety and dreamt

of 'ightmare on Elm #treet" )t must have been the reddie

effect"

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3 – Sometimes ... having longnails draws blood (yours and

others’)

Dn ?ednesday, ) left my office at 3";3 on the dot and if

anyone frowned at my perceived mid-afternoon departure,

they said nothing to me" A (uic dash home for a change

into %ycra shorts, vest top and hoodie and ) made it to the

club on time where >ax was already helping a few others

get their slee boats out of the shed" ?hen he saw me he

excused himself and started to wal towards where ) was

standing"

)n the distance ) saw anie uno in a boat with three

other girls one with her dar tresses tied up in a bright pin

top not, another with short blonde hair who was fiddlingwith something and a girl at the bac, sporting a cap" All

four looed competent and elegant as they rowed together

in time facing forward while the voice of their cox drifted

across the water issuing instructions ) did not understand"

As ) watched them, transfixed by the moving tableaux they

presented, ) was oblivious to anything and jumped when

>ax spoe"$ello there" Am ) pleased to see you or what&

is smile was broad, if not (uite direct as ) explained

earlier"

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$ow&s wor been 5hings any better&

$#o, so" 8sycho-reddie is still on my case but )&ve let

it be nown that ) don&t intend to tread the same path as my

predecessor which put the wind up him a bit and is buying

me some precious time" ) really appreciated speaing to

you the other night" 5his is a big move for me and ) want to

be grown up about it" Crying down the phone to my fols

will only get me a $we told you so& which won&t help"&

$Fou&re welcome and glad to be of service"&

e gave me a funny little salute which, despite myself,

made me laugh"

$Are you nervous about any of this& he ased, raising

an eyebrow and taing in my body and clothes"

'ot that it was obvious" 'o, no, he was >r #moothy

himself but chec me out he did in spades" e obviously

lied what he saw because he liced his lips for a split

second which was not lost on me" ?asted perhaps, because

of my decision to stay $friendly professional&, but definitely

not lost"

$'o, not really,& ) lied"

5he night before, as well as having nightmares about

8sycho-reddie the !, ) had dreamt ) was drowning" #oon

)&d have bags under my eyes bigger than !ot Cotton&s"

$)&ve arranged to meet anie uno here later" !o you

now her #he was rowing just now with three others"&

e thought for a second and brushed his fringe to one

side as was his habit"

$'o, ) don&t thin so but as ) said, ) haven&t been here

for a while and members come and go all the time"&

) concluded that if he&d met her, he would have

remembered so ) didn&t pursue it and looed instead at theheavy fibreglass boat he was leaning against, guessing

correctly it was $the one&" )t looed to be about twice the

width of anie uno&s and was clearly for learners" %ucily,

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Emma Bellemy - Living with Juno