8/2/2019 Ego States

1/34

TRANSACTIONS & EGO STATES

FREUDS CONCEPT

y ID : Part of psyche residing in the unconscious source of

instinctive energy which seeks satisfaction in accordance with

pleasure principle. These are modified by the ego and super ego

before they are given Overt expression.

y Ego : Is the part of psyche that experiences and reacts to the

outside world and bring out drives of Id and demands of Social

& Physical Environment.

y Super Ego : That part of the psychic which mediates between

Ego drives & Social Ideals acting as a Conscience which may

be partly conscious & partly unconscious.

8/2/2019 Ego States

2/34

EGO STATES

ADULT

NURTURINGPARENT

CRITICALPARENT

LITTELEPROFESSOR NA

TURA

LCHILD

REBELLIOUSCHILD

ADAPTIVECHILD

8/2/2019 Ego States

3/34

CRITICAL PARENT

Thoughts : Do/Dont , Good/Bad, Always/Never,Right/Wrong, Ought, I Know The Best, Must

Feelings : Self-Righteous, Intolerant, Demanding

Behavior : Foot-Tapping, Frowned Brow, HandWagging, Stern Stare, Finger Wagging, Hands On Hips

Voice Tones : Superior, Criticizing, Putting Down,Accusing, Taunt, Insistent, Tongue Clicking, Sighing

8/2/2019 Ego States

4/34

Vocabulary Clues : Shocking, Nonsense, Lazy, Poor ThingEverybody Why You, Do It, You Never

Physical Postures : Stroking, Chin, Puffed Up, SuperCorrect, Very Proper, Superior Attitudes, Throwing HandsIn Air

Facial Expressions : Frowns, Worried, Disapproving Looks,Tight Lips, Jutting Chin, Stern Stare

Gestures : Pointing Finger, Pencil/Boot Tapping, Arms

Folded Across Chest, Striking Table with Fist

General : Closure To New Data, Automatic Judgments Basedon Archaic Material

8/2/2019 Ego States

5/34

NURTURING PARENT

Thoughts :Work Hard, Do Your Best, Everything Will

Be OK, Dont Give Up, Never Give Up

Feelings : Protective, Loving, Caring, Encouraging

Behavior : Smiling, Outstretched Arms, ConcernedLook, Hugging

Voice Tones : Concerned, Comforting, Caring, Soothing

Vocabulary Clues :Whats Wrong ?, Are You OK ?, CanI Help You ?, Dont Worry, Everything Will Be OK

8/2/2019 Ego States

6/34

Physical Postures : Open Arms, Protecting From Fall

Or Hurt, Pack On Back, Arm Around Shoulder

Facial Expressions : Concerned, Supportive,Encouraging, Warm, Happy

Gestures : Reaching For, Hugging Protecting &Shielding From Harm

General : Support & Concern

8/2/2019 Ego States

7/34

ADULT

Thoughts :Who, What, Why, When, Where, ExecutiveBetween Child & Parent, Develop Alternatives,Estimate Probabilities, Make Decisions

Feelings : Transferred From Child Or Parent, No LongerOut Of Past But Feelings Are Reality Based, Direct &Authentic, No Anger

Behavior : Active Concerned Listening, Pondering &

Reflective, Patient & Relaxed, Large Muscle Activity

Voice Tones : Matter of Fact, Even, Calm

8/2/2019 Ego States

8/34

Vocabulary Clues : How, What ,When, Why, Who. Whatsthe Probability, Is It Possible, In What Way, I Speak Only

For Myself & Not For Others

Physical Postures : Relaxed, Attentive, Eye Contact,Listening With Openness, Continuous Reaction ThroughFace/Eyes/Body

Facial Expressions :Alert Eyes Paying Close Attention

Gestures : Learning Forwarded In Chair, Eye-To-EyeContact, Listening With Openness

General : Data Gathering Sensitivity, Openness & Thinking

8/2/2019 Ego States

9/34

ADAPTIVE CHILD

Thoughts : Dont, Leave Me, Help Me, Show Me,Protect Me

Feelings : Insecure, Dependent, Fearful, Cautious,

Affectionate

Behavior : Complaint, Wringing Hand, Timid,Downcast Eyes, Biting Nails

Voice Tones :Whining, Shirking With Anger, Begging,Regretful

8/2/2019 Ego States

10/34

Vocabulary Clues : It Always Happens To Me, I Guess I AmJust Unlucky, I Never Seem To Win At Anything, Thats Not

Fair, Every Body Else Does It, Come On, Lets

Physical Postures :Withdrawn & Retreating, Beat Down,Over-Burdened, Self-Conscious

Facial Expressions : Down Cast Eyes, Trembling Lips, MoistEyes

Gestures : Fearful, Raising Hands For Permission, HungHead

General : Expectation Meeting

8/2/2019 Ego States

11/34

NATURAL/FREE CHILD

Thoughts :I Want, I Wish, I Can, Let Me

Feelings : Insecure, Fun Loving, Affectionate

Behavior : Laughter, Pleading, Play, Tears, Touching,Watchful, Anger

Voice Tones : Rising, High Pitched, Noisy

Vocabulary Clues : I Am Mad At You, Hey, Great, IDont Know, Gee, Crazy, Rats, Wow

8/2/2019 Ego States

12/34

Physical Postures : Playful, Excited, Running, Dancing,Jumping Up & Down

Facial Expressions : Excitement, Surprise, EyesShining, Body Tense, Mouth Open

Gestures : Laughter, Limbs Moving Freely, Playful

General :Aroused Feelings Suggesting That The Child

Has Been Hooked

8/2/2019 Ego States

13/34

REBELLIOUS CHILD

Thoughts : No, I Wont Never

Feelings : Frustration, Anger, Rebellion

Behavior : Tantrum, Attack, Sulking, Pouting,Withdrawal, Revengeful

Voice Tones : High Pitched, Noisy, Angry, Insulting

8/2/2019 Ego States

14/34

Vocabulary Clues : So What?, I Will Do It, I Dont Care

Physical Postures : Defensive, Ready To Attack

Facial Expressions : Irritating, Non-Responsive, Wide

Open Eyes

Gestures : Rolling Sleeves, Vulgar

General : High Need for Recognition

8/2/2019 Ego States

15/34

LITTLE PROFESSOR

Thoughts : Let Me Explore, Let Me Try, Any BetterMethod ?

Feelings : Creativity, Satisfaction, Achievement

Behavior : Experimental, Positive, Trying

Voice Tones : Sometimes Very High Pitched,Murmuring

8/2/2019 Ego States

16/34

Vocabulary Clues : Why Cant It Be Done? There HasTo Be A Way Out, Lets Do Something New

Physical Postures : Sometimes Attentive, Sometimes

In Own World

Facial Expressions : Wide Open Eyes, LookingNowhere, Lost, Very Interested

Gestures : Trying

General : Thinks & Behaves Differently

8/2/2019 Ego States

17/34

INDICATORS OF EGO STATESBODYLANGUAGE

EXPRESSIONS VOCAL TONE

PARENT

INDICATORS

Looking down

over rim of glasses.Pointing anaccusing finger.Hands on hip, thehead leaning orstraining forward.

Patting on theback.

You should

You oughtWhy dont youStay looseBe coolDont tell meYou Disappoint

meYou alwaysPoor thingI will protect you

Harsh

JudgmentalSoothingIndignantCommandingComforting

8/2/2019 Ego States

18/34

ADULTINDICATORS

Astraight,relaxed stanceslightly tilted

head,appearance ofactive listening,relaxed, eyecontact andconfident

The offer ofalternatives andoptions. Use of

the 5Ws inquestioning.Aha I seeI see your pointI recognize..How do you feel

about..

RelaxedAssertiveSomewhat

DeliberativeSelfAssertive

CHILDINDICATORS

Forlornappearance.Droopingshoulders.

Withdrawal.Pursued lips.Scowling,Skipping,Hugging, Twinklein eyes

I want I wishWow I shouldIf only Did I dookay? One of

these days Itsnot fair Its notmy faulty (Ohboy)

AppealingComplainingNaggingIndignant

CheerfulProtestingGrublingMumblingSullen

8/2/2019 Ego States

19/34

TRA

NSA

CTIONS :

TRANSACTIONS, INVOLVING STIMULUS AND RESPONSE, CAN BE

CLASSIFIED AS COMPLIMENTARY, CROSSED OR ULTERIOR.

A COMPLEMENTARY TRANSACTION OCCURS WHEN THE MESSAGE SENT

GETS THE PREDICTED RESPONSE FROM THE OTHER PERSON OR WHEN

THE STIMULUS AND RESPONSE MAKE PARALLEL LINES, WHEREAS IN

CROSSED TRANSACTIONS THERE IS AN UNEXPECTED OR INAPPROPRIATE

RESPONSE AND THE LINES OF COMMUNICATION BECOME CROSSED.

8/2/2019 Ego States

20/34

TRANSACTIONS

P

A

C

P

A

C

A

B

8/2/2019 Ego States

21/34

COMPLIMENTARY TRANSACTIONS

P

A

C

P

A

C

8/2/2019 Ego States

22/34

CROSSED TRANSACTIONS

P

A

C

P

A

C

A

C

8/2/2019 Ego States

23/34

ULTERIOR/DUPLEX TRANSACTIONS

- MORE THAN ONE EGO STATES

P

A

C

P

A

C

SOCIAL

PSYCHO

8/2/2019 Ego States

24/34

4. GAME :

GAME IS A RECURRING SET OF TRANSACTIONS WITH A CONCEALED

MOTIVATION. IN MOST CASES GAMES ARE INTEGRAL COMPONENTS OF

UNSUCCESSFUL LIFE-PLANS OF AN INDIVIDUAL.

5. SCRIPT :

A SCRIPT IS LIKE A BLUEPRINT OF A LIFE PLAN CONTAINING STRICTURES,

INJUNCTIONS, PRESCRIPTIONS AND PERMISSIONS WHICH MAKES ONE

WINNER OR LOSER IN LIFE.

IN ORDER TO MAKE AN INDIVIDUAL EFFECTIVE, IT IS NECESSARY THAT HIS

SCRIPT IS UNDERSTOOD AND REWRITTEN, IF NECESSARY WITH REASON

AND RATIONALITY.

8/2/2019 Ego States

25/34

Life Script

When we engage in transactions, our general approach isdetermined by our life script or life plan which influences how

experiences unfold.

This script is formed by a sense of personal policies or rules which

the individual follows in copying with his environment.

The script may have such messages such as, Always be

prepared, Never trust the opposite sex, Save your money for a

rainy day & Dont get too close to people.

A script may be healthy or unhealthy depending upon our

underlying attitude of confidence and fear.

8/2/2019 Ego States

26/34

CONTAMINATION OF EGO STATE

PREJUDICE

FEAR

PARENT

ADULT

CHILD

8/2/2019 Ego States

27/34

EXCLUSION OF CHILD EGO STATE

PARENT

ADULT

CHILD

ADULT CONTAMINATED BY PARENT & CHILD BLOCKED OUTA PERSON WHO CANNOT PLAYDUTY DOMINATED PERSONSERIOUS MINDED PERSON

8/2/2019 Ego States

28/34

EXCLUSION OF ADULT EGO STATE

PARENT

ADULT

CHILD

PARENT & CHILD CONTAMINATED BY EACH OTHER & ADULT BLOCKED OUTDECOMISSIONED ADULTNO TOUCH OF REALITY

PSYCHOTIC

8/2/2019 Ego States

29/34

EXCLUSION OF PARENT EGO STATE

ADULT

CHILD

PARENT

ADULT CONTAMINATED BY CHILDPARENT BLOCKED OUT

APERSON WITHOUT CONSCIENCEPSYCHOPATH

NO DATAON SOCIAL CONTROL

8/2/2019 Ego States

30/34

A Conscious and Verbal Decision, Other Positions are unconscioussince made early in life

Based on Thoughts, Faith and Wager of Action, other positions are

based on feelings.

Develops due to repeated exposure to situations in which the child

can prove

Learns to recognize and accept the significance of others

Knows his worth and worth of others.

Adult dominates personality

Feels, Life Is Worth Living

8/2/2019 Ego States

31/34

IM NOT OK YOURE OK(Futility Position)

Universal Position At the Time Of Birth

Feels At The Mercy of Other

Has Great Need For Stroking Or Recognition

Inexperienced And Confused Child Predominates The

Personality

Feels, My Life Is Not Worth Much

Feels, Life Is Not Worth Living At All

8/2/2019 Ego States

32/34

IM NOT OK-YOURE NOT OK(Introjective Position)

May Start By One Year Of Age

Infants Logical Conclusion From Reduced Stroking

Adult Stops Developing Due To No Strokes

Loses Interest In Living

Gives Up Hope

Child Dominates Personality

Feels, Life Is Not Worth Living At All

8/2/2019 Ego States

33/34

IM OK-YOURE NOT OK(Projective Position)

May Start To Brutality Of Parent

Infants Logical Conclusion From Licking His Own Wounds

Experiences A Sense Of Comfort All By Himself

Learns To Take Care Of Himself

Blames Others For Miseries

Parent Dominates Personality

Feels, Your Life Is Not Worth Much

8/2/2019 Ego States

34/34

CHILDREN LEARN WHAT THEY LIVE WITH

y If a child live with Criticism He learns to Condemn

y If a child live with Hostility He learns to Fight

y If a child live with Ridicule He learns to be Shy

y If a child live with Shame He learns to feel Guilty

y If a child live with Tolerance He learns to be patient

y If a child live with Encouragement He learns to be Confident

y If a child live with Fairness He learns to be Just

y If a child live with Praise He learns to be Appreciative

y If a child live with Approval He learns to have Faith

y If a child live with Acceptance & He learns to find love in the

Friendship world