2016 WALL CALENDAR

I Could Pee on This And Other Poems by Cats

Includes

Sept-Dec 2

015

at a glanc

e

2016ICouldPeeOnThisDailyWallCalendar_CVR_2G.indd 1 9/22/14 3:04 PM

COPYRIGHTED:

NOT AUTHORIZED

FOR DISTRIBUTION

Sometimes “Meow” just doesn’t quite get

the point across ...

From the ode “Let Me Count,” to the thoughtful “Seen it All,” and the devotional “I Will Save You,” these poems and photos reveal every desire, conflict, and moment of neurotic genius of our cat and kitten companions. Enjoy a year of wonderfully entertaining feline advice, observations, and irrationality.

Text copyright © 2015 Francesco Marciuliano

Cover photo copyright © Klein-Hubert/KimballStock. Copyright © iStockphoto/photographer: bibikoff, 1; 101cats, 5; lafar, 7; Kileman, 9; Dorin_S, 11 (kitten); fcdb, 11 (stamp); Dmytro_Skorobogatov, 13; neotakezo, 15; Stuphipps, 19; Lynchian, 23. Copyright © Shutterstock/photographer: janinajaak, 3; Jorge Pereira, 17; foaloce, 25. Copyright © 123RF/Elena Kovaleva, 21.

All rights reserved. No part of this calendar may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the publisher.

Manufactured in ChinaCalendar design by Sally Carmichael

2016 WALL CALENDAR

I Could Pee on ThisAnd Other Poems by Cats

C011223

$14.99 U.S./£10.99 U.K.

2015

Includes

Sept-Dec

2015

at a glan

ce

2016ICouldPeeOnThisDailyWallCalendar_CVR_2G.indd 4 9/22/14 3:05 PM

COPYRIGHTED:

COPYRIGHTED:

NOT AUTHORIZED

FOR DISTRIBUTION

2015

2016ICouldPeeOnThisDailyWallCalendar_INT_Mechs.indd 1 9/30/14 1:22 PM

COPYRIGHTED:

NOT AUTHORIZED

FOR DISTRIBUTION

Remember

Remember that Tuesday

Not last week

Not last month

Maybe last year

When I sat on your lap

When I licked your nose

When I did not expect food in return?

Well, don’t you dare

Ever doubt my love for you again

2016ICouldPeeOnThisDailyWallCalendar_INT_Mechs.indd 6 9/30/14 1:23 PM

COPYRIGHTED:

COPYRIGHTED:

NOT AUTHORIZED

AUTHORIZED

FOR DISTRIBUTION

DISTRIBUTION

SATURDAYFRIDAYTHURSDAYWEDNESDAYTUESDAYMONDAYSUNDAY

MARCH

1 2 3 4 5

6 7 8 9 10 11 12

13 14 15 16 17 18 19

20 21 22 23 24 25 26

27 28 29 30 31

1 2 3 4 5 6

7 8 9 10 11 12 13

14 15 16 17 18 19 20

21 22 23 24 25 26 27

28 29

S M T W T F S

FEBRUARY

1 2

3 4 5 6 7 8 9

10 11 12 13 14 15 16

17 18 19 20 21 22 23

24 25 26 27 28 29 30

S M T W T F S

APRIL

�

�

�

�

�

Daylight Saving Time begins(US, CAN)

EquinoxPalm Sunday

EasterSummer Time begins (UK, IRL)

Mothering Sunday (UK, IRL)

Good FridayPurim

St. Patrick’s Day

Easter Monday (CAN, UK, IRL)

2016ICouldPeeOnThisDailyWallCalendar_INT_Mechs.indd 7 9/30/14 1:23 PM

COPYRIGHTED:

1

COPYRIGHTED:

1 2

COPYRIGHTED:

2

9

COPYRIGHTED:

9

16

COPYRIGHTED: 16

T

COPYRIGHTED:

T F

COPYRIGHTED:

F

NOT T

NOT T W

NOT W

APRILNOT

APRIL

AUTHORIZED

7

AUTHORIZED

7 8

AUTHORIZED

8

15

AUTHORIZED

15

22

AUTHORIZED

22 23

AUTHORIZED

23

30

AUTHORIZED 30

WAUTHORIZED

W

FOR M

FOR M

APRILFOR APRIL

DISTRIBUTION

5DISTRIBUTION

5 6DISTRIBUTION

6

13

DISTRIBUTION

13 14

DISTRIBUTION

14

21

DISTRIBUTION

21

28

DISTRIBUTION

28 29

DISTRIBUTION

29

On The NosePaw on your nose onceMeans “Hello.”Paw on your nose twiceMeans “Hello again!”Paw on your nose three timesMeans I tire of this conversationAnd am hoping this is your “off” button

2016ICouldPeeOnThisDailyWallCalendar_INT_Mechs.indd 8 9/30/14 1:23 PM

COPYRIGHTED:

NOT AUTHORIZED

FOR DISTRIBUTION

SATURDAYFRIDAYTHURSDAYWEDNESDAYTUESDAYMONDAYSUNDAY

APRIL 1 2

3 4 5 6 7 8 9

10 11 12 13 14 15 16

17 18 19 20 21 22 23

24 25 26 27 28 29 30

1 2 3 4 5

6 7 8 9 10 11 12

13 14 15 16 17 18 19

20 21 22 23 24 25 26

27 28 29 30 31

S M T W T F S

MARCH

1 2 3 4 5 6 7

8 9 10 11 12 13 14

15 16 17 18 19 20 21

22 23 24 25 26 27 28

29 30 31

S M T W T F S

MAY

�

�

�

�

April Fools’ Day

PassoverSt. George’s Day (UK, IRL)Earth Day

2016ICouldPeeOnThisDailyWallCalendar_INT_Mechs.indd 9 9/30/14 1:23 PM

COPYRIGHTED:

6

COPYRIGHTED:

6 7

COPYRIGHTED:

7

14

COPYRIGHTED:

14

21

COPYRIGHTED: 21

T

COPYRIGHTED:

T F

COPYRIGHTED:

F

NOT T

NOT T AUTHORIZED

4AUTHORIZED

4 5AUTHORIZED

5

12

AUTHORIZED

12 13

AUTHORIZED

13

20

AUTHORIZED

20

27

AUTHORIZED

27 28

AUTHORIZED

28

WAUTHORIZED

W

FOR 2

FOR 2M

FOR M

MAYFOR MAY

DISTRIBUTION

3DISTRIBUTION

3

10DISTRIBUTION

10 11DISTRIBUTION

11

18

DISTRIBUTION

18 19

DISTRIBUTION

19

25

DISTRIBUTION

25 26

DISTRIBUTION

26

I HUG

I hug your arm

I really hug your arm

I bite down hard on your arm

And I could not love you more

And you could not be more confusedAnd we have a relationship

That could best be described as “complicated”

2016ICouldPeeOnThisDailyWallCalendar_INT_Mechs.indd 12 9/30/14 1:23 PM

COPYRIGHTED:

COPYRIGHTED:

COPYRIGHTED:

NOT NOT AUTHORIZED

AUTHORIZED

AUTHORIZED

FOR FOR DISTRIBUTION

DISTRIBUTION

SATURDAYFRIDAYTHURSDAYWEDNESDAYTUESDAYMONDAYSUNDAY

JUNE 1 2 3 4

5 6 7 8 9 10 11

12 13 14 15 16 17 18

19 20 21 22 23 24 25

26 27 28 29 30

1 2

3 4 5 6 7 8 9

10 11 12 13 14 15 16

17 18 19 20 21 22 23

24 25 26 27 28 29 30

S M T W T F S

31

JULY

1 2 3 4 5 6 7

8 9 10 11 12 13 14

15 16 17 18 19 20 21

22 23 24 25 26 27 28

29 30 31

S M T W T F S

MAY

�

�

�

�

Bank Holiday (IRL)Ramadan

Flag Day (US)

Father’s Day Solstice

2016ICouldPeeOnThisDailyWallCalendar_INT_Mechs.indd 13 9/30/14 1:23 PM

COPYRIGHTED:

1

COPYRIGHTED:

1 2

COPYRIGHTED:

2

9

COPYRIGHTED:

9

16

COPYRIGHTED: 16

T

COPYRIGHTED:

T F

COPYRIGHTED:

F

NOT T

NOT T W

NOT W

JULYNOT

JULY

AUTHORIZED

7

AUTHORIZED

7 8

AUTHORIZED

8

15

AUTHORIZED

15

22

AUTHORIZED

22 23

AUTHORIZED

23

30

AUTHORIZED 30

WAUTHORIZED

W

FOR M

FOR M

JULYFOR JULY

DISTRIBUTION

5DISTRIBUTION

5 6DISTRIBUTION

6

13

DISTRIBUTION

13 14

DISTRIBUTION

14

21

DISTRIBUTION

21

28

DISTRIBUTION

28 29

DISTRIBUTION

29

SOMEHOW IT HAPPENED

Yesterday

Perhaps by mistake

Maybe in a moment of weakness

Possibly because I took the wrong pill

I played fetch

And it was wonderful

And it was magical

And now I don’t know

Who I am anymore

2016ICouldPeeOnThisDailyWallCalendar_INT_Mechs.indd 14 9/30/14 1:24 PM

COPYRIGHTED:

COPYRIGHTED:

NOT AUTHORIZED

AUTHORIZED

AUTHORIZED

FOR FOR DISTRIBUTION

DISTRIBUTION

DISTRIBUTION

DISTRIBUTION

DISTRIBUTION

DISTRIBUTION

DISTRIBUTION

DISTRIBUTION

DISTRIBUTION

DISTRIBUTION

DISTRIBUTION

SATURDAYFRIDAYTHURSDAYWEDNESDAYTUESDAYMONDAYSUNDAY

JULY 1 2

3 4 5 6 7 8 9

10 11 12 13 14 15 16

17 18 19 20 21 22 23

24 25 26 27 28 29 30

31

1 2 3 4

5 6 7 8 9 10 11

12 13 14 15 16 17 18

19 20 21 22 23 24 25

26 27 28 29 30

S M T W T F S

JUNE

1 2 3 4 5 6

7 8 9 10 11 12 13

14 15 16 17 18 19 20

21 22 23 24 25 26 27

28 29 30 31

S M T W T F S

AUGUST

�

�

�

�

Canada Day (CAN)

Independence Day (US)

2016ICouldPeeOnThisDailyWallCalendar_INT_Mechs.indd 15 9/30/14 1:24 PM

COPYRIGHTED:

5

COPYRIGHTED:

5

12

COPYRIGHTED:

12 13

COPYRIGHTED:

13

20

COPYRIGHTED: 20

T

COPYRIGHTED:

T F

COPYRIGHTED:

F

NOT T

NOT T

AUGUSTNOT

AUGUST

AUTHORIZED

3AUTHORIZED

3 4AUTHORIZED

4

11

AUTHORIZED

11 12

AUTHORIZED

12

18

AUTHORIZED

18 19

AUTHORIZED

19

26

AUTHORIZED

26 27

AUTHORIZED

27

WAUTHORIZED

W

FOR 1

FOR 1M

FOR M

AUGUSTFOR AUGUST

DISTRIBUTION

2DISTRIBUTION

2

9DISTRIBUTION

9 10DISTRIBUTION

10

17

DISTRIBUTION

17

24

DISTRIBUTION

24 25

DISTRIBUTION

25

I WILL SAVE YOU

MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW

DON’T YOU WORRY!

SCRATCH SCRATCH SCRATCH SCRATCH SCRATCH

DON’T YOU FEAR!

BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG

DON’T YOU THINK

FOR ONE SECOND

THAT I WILL EVER STOP!

THAT I WILL EVER GIVE UP!

THAT I WILL EVER LEAVE YOU BEHIND

THIS LOCKED BEDROOM DOOR!

FOR I WILL SAVE YOU

FROM ANOTHER SLEEPLESS NIGHT WITHOUT ME!

2016ICouldPeeOnThisDailyWallCalendar_INT_Mechs.indd 16 9/30/14 1:24 PM

COPYRIGHTED:

COPYRIGHTED:

NOT AUTHORIZED

AUTHORIZED

AUTHORIZED

FOR DISTRIBUTION

DISTRIBUTION

DISTRIBUTION

DISTRIBUTION

SATURDAYFRIDAYTHURSDAYWEDNESDAYTUESDAYMONDAYSUNDAY

AUGUST 1 2 3 4 5 6

7 8 9 10 11 12 13

14 15 16 17 18 19 20

21 22 23 24 25 26 27

28 29 30 31

1 2 3

4 5 6 7 8 9 10

11 12 13 14 15 16 17

18 19 20 21 22 23 24

25 26 27 28 29 30

S M T W T F S

SEPTEMBER

31

1 2

3 4 5 6 7 8 9

10 11 12 13 14 15 16

17 18 19 20 21 22 23

24 25 26 27 28 29 30

S M T W T F S

JULY

�

�

�

�

Bank Holiday (IRL)

Bank Holiday (ENG, N.IRL, SCT)

2016ICouldPeeOnThisDailyWallCalendar_INT_Mechs.indd 17 9/30/14 1:24 PM

COPYRIGHTED:

2

COPYRIGHTED:

2 3

COPYRIGHTED:

3

10

COPYRIGHTED:

10

17

COPYRIGHTED: 17

T

COPYRIGHTED:

T F

COPYRIGHTED:

F

SEPTEMBER

COPYRIGHTED:

SEPTEMBERNOT T

NOT T

SEPTEMBERNOT

SEPTEMBER

AUTHORIZED

1AUTHORIZED

1

8

AUTHORIZED

8

15

AUTHORIZED

15 16

AUTHORIZED

16

23

AUTHORIZED

23 24

AUTHORIZED

24

WAUTHORIZED

W

FOR M

FOR M

SEPTEMBERFOR SEPTEMBER

DISTRIBUTION

6DISTRIBUTION

6 7DISTRIBUTION

7

14

DISTRIBUTION

14 15

DISTRIBUTION

15

21

DISTRIBUTION

21 22

DISTRIBUTION

22

29

DISTRIBUTION

29 30

DISTRIBUTION

30