Descriptive WritingDescriptive WritingDescriptive WritingDescriptive WritingClear description providesClear description provides

a dominant impression.a dominant impression.

What is descriptive What is descriptive writing?writing?

• Descriptive writing Descriptive writing has one, clear has one, clear dominant impression.dominant impression.

• So to describe a So to describe a snowfall, you must snowfall, you must picture it as pretty or picture it as pretty or dangerous, but not dangerous, but not both at once.both at once.

• The thesis sentence The thesis sentence asserts something asserts something about the topic.about the topic.

• Then the details all Then the details all support that view.support that view.

• What is the thesis?What is the thesis?

• The ten-inch snowfall The ten-inch snowfall was beautiful, but it was beautiful, but it was also quite deadly. was also quite deadly. Cars had slid off the Cars had slid off the road, forcing drivers to road, forcing drivers to walk on the ice. The walk on the ice. The town had several bad town had several bad car collisions, mostly at car collisions, mostly at corners. The worst one corners. The worst one of all happened when a of all happened when a sixteen-year-old driver sixteen-year-old driver hit and killed a hit and killed a grandmother crossing grandmother crossing Walnut Avenue.Walnut Avenue.

What are cars likelyWhat are cars likelyto do on snow?to do on snow?

Descriptive writing has a Descriptive writing has a point!point!

• About the About the snowfall, the snowfall, the point is that it point is that it is is dangerousdangerous..

• The support The support sentences sentences add details add details that go from that go from bad to worse bad to worse and then to and then to the very the very worst.worst.

• The ten-inch snowfall was The ten-inch snowfall was beautiful,beautiful, but it was also but it was also quite deadlyquite deadly..

1.1. Cars had slid off the Cars had slid off the road, forcing drivers to road, forcing drivers to walk on the ice.walk on the ice.

2.2. The town had several The town had several bad car collisions, bad car collisions, mostly at corners.mostly at corners.

3.3. The worst one of all The worst one of all happened when a happened when a sixteen-year-old driver sixteen-year-old driver hit and killed a hit and killed a grandmother crossing grandmother crossing Walnut Avenue.Walnut Avenue.

What trouble does snowfall bring drivers?What trouble does snowfall bring drivers?

Is description objective or Is description objective or subjective?subjective?

• A descriptive essay A descriptive essay can be objective or can be objective or subjective, giving the subjective, giving the author a wide choice author a wide choice of tone and attitude.of tone and attitude.

• Objective description Objective description of one's dog would of one's dog would mention facts like its mention facts like its height, weight and height, weight and color.color.

• Subjective description Subjective description would include all that, would include all that, but would also stress but would also stress the author's feeling the author's feeling toward the dog, and its toward the dog, and its personality and habits.personality and habits.

• Objective Objective oror subjectivesubjective??• Blondie, a cute wiener Blondie, a cute wiener

dog with a winsome look, dog with a winsome look, was my favorite pet. She was my favorite pet. She liked to follow me. At the liked to follow me. At the store, when I gave her store, when I gave her half of my Twinkie, her half of my Twinkie, her eyes would twinkle. She eyes would twinkle. She liked fishing with me, liked fishing with me, especially when I caught especially when I caught minnows for her to eat. minnows for her to eat. The only place she didn’t The only place she didn’t go was school, but she go was school, but she waited at the bus stop for waited at the bus stop for me, come cloud or rain. me, come cloud or rain. She was a great pet. She was a great pet.

Doesn’t the passageDoesn’t the passagepromote a feeling?promote a feeling?

How important are the How important are the senses?senses?

• Descriptive writing Descriptive writing relies on concrete, relies on concrete, sensory detail to sensory detail to communicate its point.communicate its point.

• Include sound, smell, Include sound, smell, taste, touch, and inner taste, touch, and inner feeling.feeling. – What sounds do you What sounds do you

hear?hear? – What odors or flavors What odors or flavors

are there?are there?– What textures objects What textures objects

have?have? – Does it make you feel Does it make you feel

positive or negative? positive or negative? What sensory troubleWhat sensory troubledid the dog get into?did the dog get into?

What about using specifics?

• Go beyond common Go beyond common nouns, like car, nouns, like car, book, magazine, book, magazine, movie, or building.movie, or building.

• Use specific names, Use specific names, such assuch as – Honda AccordHonda Accord – Gone With the Wind Gone With the Wind – Seventeen MagazineSeventeen Magazine – Jurassic ParkJurassic Park – Dalton State CollegeDalton State College

• In the passage on the right, are there any specifics details?

• When Kamie was When Kamie was eleven years old, a eleven years old, a routine physical routine physical uncovered an abnormal uncovered an abnormal curvature in her spine, curvature in her spine, scoliosis. Kamie, as well scoliosis. Kamie, as well as her family, was as her family, was devastated. They were devastated. They were told by the doctor that told by the doctor that only 10 percent of all only 10 percent of all children are afflicted by children are afflicted by scoliosis, but her family scoliosis, but her family just couldn’t believe just couldn’t believe Kamie was a part of Kamie was a part of that 10 percent.that 10 percent.

Here are the specific details:

• Names and numbers are Names and numbers are very specific details:very specific details:

• When When KamieKamie was was eleven eleven years oldyears old, a routine , a routine physical uncovered an physical uncovered an abnormal curvature in her abnormal curvature in her spine, spine, scoliosisscoliosis. Kamie, as . Kamie, as well as her family, was well as her family, was devastated. They were told devastated. They were told by the doctor that only by the doctor that only 10 10 percentpercent of all children are of all children are afflicted by scoliosis, but afflicted by scoliosis, but her family just couldn’t her family just couldn’t believe Kamie was a part believe Kamie was a part of that of that 10 percent10 percent..

Can we use colorful Can we use colorful adjectives?adjectives?

• Forget good, fun, tall, fast, short, beautiful, ugly, light, rough, or kind.

• Say someone was six-and-a-half feet.

• Say it went 90 miles per hour.

• Say the jerk had a scar running from his right cheek to his jaw.

• Say “we ran along the beach every morning at six.”

• Not just ‘we had fun on our vacation’.

What’s colorful about What’s colorful about Johnny Depp in the role of Johnny Depp in the role of

Captain Jack Sparrow?Captain Jack Sparrow?

Can you use active verbs?

1.1. Don’t say that Don’t say that someone’s heart someone’s heart was beating was beating fast.fast.

2.2. Say that it was Say that it was thumping, or thumping, or palpitating, palpitating, oror skippingskipping. .

3.3. Don’t say a girl ran Don’t say a girl ran down the hall.down the hall.

4.4. Write that she Write that she skippedskipped or or danceddanced down the hall. down the hall.

• Which active verbs Which active verbs can you find? can you find?

• I answered yes to 7 I answered yes to 7 of the 10 symptoms of the 10 symptoms and “may be and “may be addicted to the net.” addicted to the net.” I never realized that I never realized that I was computer I was computer addicted. Then addicted. Then Arnie’s words hit Arnie’s words hit home: ‘Technology home: ‘Technology is addicting. Like is addicting. Like heroin, the bad habit heroin, the bad habit feeds on our wish to feeds on our wish to escape the limits of escape the limits of time and space; and time and space; and it consumes us.’it consumes us.’

Here are the active verbs:

• I answered yes to 7 I answered yes to 7 of the 10 symptoms of the 10 symptoms and “may be and “may be addicted to the net.” addicted to the net.” I never I never realizedrealized that that I was computer I was computer addicted. Then addicted. Then Arnie’s words Arnie’s words hithit home: ‘Technology home: ‘Technology is addicting. Like is addicting. Like heroin, the bad habit heroin, the bad habit feeds onfeeds on our wish to our wish to escape the limits of escape the limits of time and space; and time and space; and it it consumesconsumes us.’ us.’

Can you create an impression?

• If you are wanting to If you are wanting to frighten people with a frighten people with a description of a description of a haunted house, for haunted house, for example, then you example, then you should use words that should use words that are dark, gloomy, and are dark, gloomy, and foreboding throughout foreboding throughout the essay. the essay.

• You can even make a You can even make a list of related words list of related words before you begin to before you begin to write. write.

• What is the main What is the main impression? impression?

• Americans lead the Americans lead the world in coffee world in coffee drinking, averaging drinking, averaging 3.4 cups per person a 3.4 cups per person a day. But is the brown day. But is the brown drink just a morning drink just a morning pick-me-up? pick-me-up? Unfortunately, much Unfortunately, much of today’s coffee is of today’s coffee is grown in such a way grown in such a way that it damages the that it damages the environment, although environment, although it has been proven it has been proven that there are far less that there are far less harmful methods.harmful methods.

Can you create an impression?

• Americans lead the Americans lead the world in coffee world in coffee drinking, averaging drinking, averaging 3.4 cups per person a 3.4 cups per person a day. But is the brown day. But is the brown drink just a morning drink just a morning pick-me-up? pick-me-up? Unfortunately, much Unfortunately, much of today’s coffee is of today’s coffee is grown in such a way grown in such a way that it damages the that it damages the environmentenvironment, although , although it has been proven it has been proven that there are far less that there are far less harmful methods.harmful methods.

Can you use a normal Can you use a normal pattern?pattern?

• Organize by Organize by putting the putting the important or important or larger features larger features first, and the first, and the less important or less important or smaller features smaller features last. last.

• In your writing, In your writing, always describe always describe fromfrom

1.1. top to bottom, top to bottom, 2.2. right to left, right to left, 3.3. or front to or front to

back.back.• What’s the What’s the

pattern? pattern?

• It started the first day at It started the first day at my horrible high school. I my horrible high school. I remember walking through remember walking through that big school on the gray, that big school on the gray, evil morning. I walked to evil morning. I walked to my resource room, and I my resource room, and I sat down right next to the sat down right next to the guy who would turn my guy who would turn my world upside down. I world upside down. I remember looking toward remember looking toward the window and seeing his the window and seeing his spiking hair outline against spiking hair outline against the dreary horizon. He was the dreary horizon. He was looking at me. I knew that looking at me. I knew that he must have been looking he must have been looking at a girl behind me or at a girl behind me or something. He couldn’t something. He couldn’t possibly be looking at me. possibly be looking at me. Boy, was I wrong.Boy, was I wrong.

Can you write in paragraphs?Can you write in paragraphs?• Use separate Use separate

paragraphs to paragraphs to describe a describe a person’s:person’s:

1.1. physical physical appearance appearance

2.2. relationships relationships with others with others

3.3. hobbies and hobbies and interestsinterests

4.4. accomplishmentaccomplishments and s and achievements achievements

5.5. beliefs, beliefs, likes/dislikes, likes/dislikes, and dreams and dreams

What’s this about?What’s this about?

• My friend Catherine is as My friend Catherine is as cool as a cucumber. She cool as a cucumber. She is Mormon, and she is Mormon, and she really believes in her really believes in her religion. I respect her for religion. I respect her for that. She is always there that. She is always there when I need a shoulder when I need a shoulder to cry on. She is to cry on. She is extremely nice, and she extremely nice, and she is as sweet as sugar. is as sweet as sugar. She is really cool to She is really cool to hang out with at the hang out with at the mall because we both mall because we both have the same style in have the same style in clothing. I have only clothing. I have only known her for a year, known her for a year, but I feel like I have but I feel like I have known her forever.known her forever.

You can organize paragraphs:You can organize paragraphs:• My friend Catherine is as My friend Catherine is as

cool as a cucumbercool as a cucumber. . 1.1. She is Mormon, and she She is Mormon, and she

really believesreally believes in her in her religion. religion.

2.2. She is She is always therealways there when I when I need a shoulder to cry on. need a shoulder to cry on.

3.3. She is extremely nice, and She is extremely nice, and she is she is as sweet as sugaras sweet as sugar. .

4.4. She is really cool to hang She is really cool to hang out with at the mall out with at the mall because we both have the because we both have the same same style in clothingstyle in clothing. .

5.5. I have only known her for I have only known her for a year, but I feel like I a year, but I feel like I have have known her foreverknown her forever..

How serious isyour shopping?

Describe with more comparisons.

• Help us understand what you are describing by using comparisons such as these:

1.1. The cashier was The cashier was as as slow as a turtle.slow as a turtle.

2.2. Her father looked Her father looked like an angry bulllike an angry bull..

3.3. The students faces The students faces looked looked like blank like blank sheets of papersheets of paper..

Is the food industry moreadvanced than other terrorists?

How to conclude a description:

• In the conclusion, connect the reader to the description.

• Or say how the thing you’re describing has changed your life.

• Try not to repeat what you said in your introduction.

• Rather, say something conclusive but new.

• How does this one end?• My friend John is easygoing.

He wears jeans or shorts and doesn’t care about fashion. When his daughter says she’s having trouble with a friend, he says, “That’s okay. It will work out.” One day, my dog bit John, hard, on his leg and tore his pants. He said it was his fault because he had disturbed the dog. John helps me keep from being too nervous.

How to conclude a description:

• In the conclusion, connect the reader to the description.

• Or say how the thing you’re describing has changed your life.

• Try not to repeat what you said in your introduction.

• Rather, say something conclusive but new.

• How does this one end?• My friend John is easygoing.

He wears jeans or shorts and doesn’t care about fashion. When his daughter says she’s having trouble with a friend, he says, “That’s okay. It will work out.” One day, my dog bit John, hard, on his leg and tore his pants. He said it was his fault because he had disturbed the dog. John helps me keep from being too nervous.

It ends with how John changes the writer’s life,making him more calm and peaceful.

Can you pass the review Can you pass the review test?test?

1.1. Descriptions Descriptions basically arebasically area. details put into a. details put into listslistsb. the only writing b. the only writing patternpatternc. word picturesc. word picturesd. lots of colorful d. lots of colorful adjectivesadjectivese. pretty normal e. pretty normal sentencessentences

2.2. Descriptions Descriptions normally tellnormally tell

a.a. How you see How you see something or something or someone.someone.

b.b. Exaggerations Exaggerations about reality.about reality.

c.c. Just how you feel Just how you feel about something.about something.

d.d. How something or How something or someone look, someone look, sound, taste, sound, taste, smell, and/or feel.smell, and/or feel.

e.e. What your What your girlfriend wants to girlfriend wants to know.know.

Can you pass the review test?

3. We use 3. We use descriptionsdescriptions

• Only when we talk.Only when we talk.• Only when we write.Only when we write.• Both when talking Both when talking

and writing.and writing.• Much more than Much more than

narration.narration.• Much less than Much less than

narration.narration.

4. 4. In descriptive In descriptive writing, the main writing, the main impression isimpression is

a.a. What your mother What your mother wants you to do.wants you to do.

b.b. The most important The most important feature.feature.

c.c. Why you left high Why you left high school.school.

d.d. The one you would The one you would like to forget.like to forget.

e.e. What you like the What you like the most about a most about a person or a thing.person or a thing.

f.f. All the details All the details added.added.

Can you pass the review Can you pass the review test?test?

• Which of these is comparison?

1.1. My essays read like My essays read like mystery novels.mystery novels.

2.2. Your essays read Your essays read well enough.well enough.

3.3. His essays sound His essays sound good to me.good to me.

4.4. Their essays could Their essays could be better than the be better than the other ones’.other ones’.

5.5. No one knows No one knows where my essay is.where my essay is.

• What stirs up more What stirs up more interest? interest?

• I toured two major I toured two major cities of Morocco—cities of Morocco—land of mystery, land of mystery, enticement, and enticement, and enchantment. I was enchantment. I was expecting belly expecting belly dancers, snake dancers, snake charmers, and exotic charmers, and exotic sights filled with color sights filled with color and decoration. While and decoration. While I did see that, most of I did see that, most of what I saw was totally what I saw was totally unexpected and will unexpected and will haunt me forever.haunt me forever.

Applying Descriptive WritingApplying Descriptive Writing• Begin by giving

your reason for telling all about someone.

• Give your main impression of the person.

• Add specific details of sight, sound, touch, etc.

• End with what the person means to you.

Now it is your turn! Write out a one-page description of your father or your mother!

• My father was a very active person. As a book salesman, he drove hours everyday. He pitched fast-pitch softball until he was 50. He stayed at the dam fishing till after dark. He shot deer with bow and arrow, providing meat for his family. At 80, he even roofed his own house.