Costambar Monthly July 2013

So, like thesong says allmy bags arepacked, Imready to go.Its time for abreak and somefamilia time!There will beno August issuebut you canalways get yourfix by going tothe website andchecking outsome backissues! Happysummer CMpeeps! And

well see you in September!

July 2013

Yennys MarketCatamaran Beach BarHappy HippoEl CareyCostambar Community Center & Library

Supermercado TropicalBig Lees Beach BarRestaurant ChinoJohns Beach BarThe Meeting PlacePuerto Plata Beach Resort

Ocean World Marina

Los Tres Cocos

What To Do This MonthUseful Telephone Numbers

Classified AdsCable Channel Listing

Definitely Not the NewsThe Rainy Day PageAnd Lots Of Other

Fun Stuff!!

HOW CAN YOU MISS MEIF I NEVER GO AWAY!

Costambar Monthly page 2

Los Tres Cocos in Las Rocas invites you to trysomething different. Fine dining at its best! Call809-993-4503 for details. PLEASE NOTE - they willbe closed Wednesday July 3rd until WednesdayJuly 4th for holidays.

At The Catamaran on Costambar Beach youll findgreat food at great prices enjoyed with a milliondollar view! Every day they have Power Hour with3X1 cuba libres from 6-7pm. NOW A WIFI ZONE!!!Make your friends jealous and email them fromthe beach! They also hold a monthly Flea Marketon the last Saturday of every month beginning at10am. No cost to vendors!

Restaurant Chino has the best Chinese food onthe North Coast! Eat in or take out. Two locations- on the Malecon in Puerto Plata and callePrincipal in Cabarete. This month they will beopen Tuesday April 2nd & 9th.

The Meeting Place is on summer hours now.Check their website for news on any happenings.

Big Lees Beach Bar on the Malecon has greatfantastic food at affordable prices! Amazing Fish &Chips, big juicy burgers and yummy sandwiches.Every Tuesday, Thursday AND Saturday enjoy acuba/santo libre for only RD$50 or Jose Cuervo foronly RD$100. Great food served all day until 8pm!July 13th is Karaoke! Starts at 8pm!

The Happy Hippo & Pedros Kitchen offer greatfood & great fun! Start your morning with Hillsnew smoothies, fresh juices & yoghurts! Pedro hasa special menu every day! Eat in or take out!

Puerto Plata Beach Club is the new hangout forexpats & upper class locals! Theres a bar, spa,cafeteria, Italian Pizza & Pasta to go, a mini-market & liquor store. Plans for this year include acasino, movie theatre, piano bar, live music &more!

Kevin & Patricia invite you to El Carey Restaurant- where you can enjoy the beach your way!! Youcan enjoy great food & drinks inside, in their

garden or under parasols on the beach. They haveDominican food, burgers, pizza & more. The housespecialty is garlic shrimp and you should tryKevins Mama Juana and pia coladas! Theyvegot lots happening! They now offer 2 hours ofHappy Hour from 6-8pm with 2X1 cuba/santolibres! And every Sunday at 2pm is Karaoke withparty maker Segundo! Try their new empanadas!Take a break from the summer heat with one oftheir refreshing Caipirinha's! A great place to hostyour next event.

Johns Beach Bar is newly opened and waiting toshow you a great time! Its the place for greatfood, great fun and great friends! And JohnsSnack Shack will tempt you with their tastyofferings including beer battered fish & chips! AllJuly enjoy cuba/santa libres for only RD$50,Presidentes - Grandes for only RD$90, Pequenasfor only RD$70 and Bohemias - Grandes for onlyRD$80 and Pequenas for only RD$65!!! And startingJuly 12th every Friday is Curry Night!!!


Feel the Breeze - Feel Freeand SafeCome Be Part of a New Community for Foreign Residents!

Puerto Plata Beach Club

809-586-4243www.puertoplatabeachclub.comEmail [email protected]

Twitter: @ppbeachclubFacebook: Ptoplabeachclub Apartments

JOIN US FOR A WEEK, A MONTH OR A YEARSTARTING AT AN INCREDIBLY LOWUS$10 PER DAY!!

THE PLACE FOR

EXPATS

On The Maleco

n in Puerto Plat

a

Bar - Spa - Cafe

teria - and More

!


On the Malecon, Puerto Plata Open by 9am

Every Tuesday, Thursday & SaturdayCUBA/SANTA LIBRES RD$50

Made with Brugal Anejo or BlancoJOSE CUERV0 RD$100

SERVING GREAT FOOD ALL DAY UNTIL 8PM

FISH & CHIPSHalf RD$200 - Full RD$300

HAMBURGERS AND FRIES1/4 lb. RD$150, 1/2 lb. RD$250

HOT DOGS: RD$70 -- SANDWICHES: RD$50-130

Restaurant ChinoBest Chinese Food Onthe North Coast! TwoGreat Locations! EatIn or Takeout!Xiang Wan JiaPlaza Neptuno, Malecon, Puerto Plata809-261-5609Calle Principal, Cabarete809-571-0385

A young family moved into a house next door toan empty plot. One day, a gang of buildingworkers turned up to start building on the plot.The young family's 5-year-old daughter naturallytook an interest in all the activity going on nextdoor and started talking with the workers.She hung around and eventually the builders, allwith hearts of gold, more or less adopted thelittle girl as a sort of project mascot. They chattedwith her, let her sit with them while they had teaand lunch breaks, and gave her little jobs to dohere and there to make her feel important.They even gave the child her very own hard hatand gloves, which thrilled her immensely.At the end of the first week, the smiling builderspresented her with a pay envelope - containingtwo dollars in 10 cent coins.The little girl took her 'pay' home to her motherwho suggested that they take the money to thebank the next day to open a savings account.At the bank, the female cashier was tickled pinklistening to the little girl telling her about her'work' on the building site and the fact she had a'pay packet'.'You must have worked very hard to earn all this',said the cashier.The little girl proudly replied, 'Yes, I worked everyday with Steve and Wayne and Mike. We'rebuilding a big house.''My goodness gracious,' said the cashier, 'Andwill you be working on the house again nextweek?'The child thought for a moment. Then she saidseriously:'I think so. Provided those a**holes at HomeDepot deliver the f***ing bricks on time.'


INTERNATIONAL GOURMETCUISINE

&AUSTRIAN SPECIALTIES

NOW A WIFI ZONE!!!!!

COME FOR THE GREAT FOOD

AT GREAT PRICES AND

THE MILLION DOLLAR VIEW!

FLEA MARKET!!!EVERY LAST SATURDAY OF THE MONTH Starting at 10am

FREE TO VENDORS!

We were dressed and ready to go out for the NewYear's Eve Party. We turned on a night light,turned the answering machine on, covered our petparakeet and put the cat in the backyard.We phoned the local cab company and requested ataxi. The taxi arrived and we opened the front doorto leave the house.As we walked out the door, the cat we had put outin the yard, scooted back into the house. We didn'twant the cat shut in the house because she alwaystries to eat the bird.My wife went on out to the taxi, while I went backinside to get the cat. The cat ran upstairs, with mein hot pursuit.Waiting in the cab, my wife didn't want the driverto know that the house would be empty for thenight, so she explained to the taxi driver that Iwould be out soon, saying 'He's just going upstairsto say goodbye to my mother.'A few minutes later, I got into the cab. 'Sorry Itook so long,' I said, as we drove away. 'That stupidbitch was hiding under the bed. I had to pokeher ass with a coat hanger to get her to come out!She tried to take off, so I grabbed her by the neck.Then, I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep herfrom scratching me. But it worked! I hauled her fatass downstairs and threw her out into the backyard! She'd better not shit in the vegetable gardenagain!'The silence in the cab was deafening.

FLASKSANDALS!

THIS SUMMERS MUST HAVE FOR THENORTH COAST!


WELCOME TOKEVIN & PATRICIAS EL CAREY

Where you can enjoy the beach your way!

Calle Reina Isabel, Costambar, Puerto PlataSpanish 809-918-1448 English 809-924-8233

CLOSED MONDAYS

Also available for parties, weddings, etc.

2 HAPPY HOURs EVERY DAY 6-8pm!2X1 Cuba/Santo Libres

EVERY SUNDAY 2pm!KARAOKE with party maker Segundo

NOW SERVING CAIPIRINHA'S!!!

Try Kevins Mama Juana & Pina Coladas!

POTLUCK BBQ!Bring your meat & grill it - Only RD$100

Salad etc. includedWithout meat RD$300

JOIN US FORWIMBLEDONSEMIS & FINALS!!

VILLA FOR RENT BY THE WEEK

All Day BreakfastFish & Chips * Chicken CurryFull Menu * Daily Specialty

Racquetball, handball, wallyball, pool-billiards,Big Screen TV for sports, movies and concerts

Smoking and non-smoking areas

4TH OF JULY - THURSDAY 2PM

THURSDAY JULY 25THTurkey Dinner with all the trimmings!

RD$500 paid by July 23 or RD$600 after


SOLUTIONS ON PAGE 9SUDOKU PUZZLESFill in the missing numbers so every row, column andquadrant contains the number 1 through 9.

SUMMER

Across1. Wander5. Extraction6. Paradise7. AssuageDown1. Seafarer2. Supreme

commander3. Diverge4. Relinquish

Find and circle all of the words that are hidden in the grid.The remaining letters spell a hidden message

ANTSAUGUSTBARBECUEBASEBALLBEACHBEESBICYCLEBLUE SKYBOATINGBREEZECAMPING

FISHINGFLIESFLOWERSGARDENINGGOLFGREEN GRASSHATHIKINGHOLIDAYSHOTICE CREAM

JULYJUNEMOSQUITOESNO SCHOOLPICNICROLLER BLADESSANDALSSKATEBOARDSOCCERSOLSTICESPRINKLERS

SUNBURNSUNGLASSESSUNSCREENSUNSHINESUNTANSWEATSWIMMINGU V RAYSWASPSWATER FIGHTSWATERMELON


Police Office 809-320-8510

Police Car 809-320-8840

APC Office 809-970-7877

APC Gate Security 809-970-7015

Codetel 809-220-1111

Edenorte - emergency 809-261-1844

Edenorte - office 809-586-9823

Costambar Taxi Stand 809-970-7318

Canada 809-586-5761

Britain 809-586-4244

U.S.A. 809-586-4204

German 809-586-6995

Italian 809-320-7601

Clinica Bournigal 809-586-2342

Clinica Brugal 809-586-2519

Los Tropicos Pharmacy 809-970-7607

12 CNN 51 CINE CANAL

22 FOX SPORT 56 SPEED

28 BOOMERANG 57 ANIMAL PLANET

30 ABC 64 SCI-FI

31 NBC 66 FOOD

32 CBS 69 DISCOVERY KIDS

33 TBS 70 WEATHER

34 CNBC 71 CINEMAX

35 ESPN-1 72 SHOWTIME

36 WGN 74 STARZ

37 CDN 79 NASA

40 TNT 80 JETIX

42 USA 81 CARTOON

43 ESPN-2 83 TNT LA

44 DISCOVERY 84 HISTORY

46 DISNEY 85 THE FILM ZONE

49 HBO

TEL: 809-970-7194


BEGINNER INTERMEDIATE

HIDDEN MESSAGESummer Vacation

CHARTS AVAILABLEGet your

nautical charts of theBahamas, Turks and Caicos Islands,

Providenciales and HispaniolaFrom

Rosa at Luperon Swap MeetWendys Bar in Luperon

Ocean World Marina in Cofresi

If you have difficulty callColin at 809-449-1819

A woman opens her friends fridge and spots apicture of a lovely slender, perfectly built, scantily-clad young woman.She asks: Whats this?Her pal replies: Oh, I put it up there to remind menot to overeat.The woman says: Does it work?Pal: Yes and no. Ive lost 15 pounds but myhusband gained 20.


Massage: Relax, Reduction, Deep Tissue, Facial Massage, Reflexology,Acupressure, & Hot StonePhysical Therapy, Paraffin Treatment & Lymphatic DrainageManicure & Pedicure: Regular & IntensiveBraids & Hair Extensions & Mens HaircutsFacials, Waxing , Peeling, Hydration & Nurse ServicesNatural Health & Beauty ProductsASK ABOUT OUR SPECIALS.Open Mon-Sat from 9:00am / Sundays by appointmentService to the home. Transportation available.#14 Penon St, Costambar Tel: 809-970-7522 Cell: 809-993-2944

RD$1230 Includes DentalRD$1480 with Drugs

Aquacero, Malecon, Puerto Plata 5pmBiekes Bar, Costambar 6:30pm

Or call Petra & Marcel Bahr1-809-885-2155

Free Estimates! Reasonable Prices! All Insurances Accepted! English Spoken!Free Parking DJimenez Store! Open Mon-Fri 8am-7pm & Sat 8am-12pm

calle Camino Real #282nd FloorPuerto PlataTel: 809-586-1707Cell: 809-903-6457

Post Graduate, Biomedical Research S.L., Spain

Full Range of Dental ServicesDental Implants * Teeth Whitening * Orthodonitics

Preventative & Cosmetic Dental Services

A husband and wife are bickering after dining outon a Friday date night. The wife was upset becauseher husband was flirting with the youngvoluptuous waitress all evening and was lettingher husband know about it. Out of anger, he beginsto speed up over the limit as they drive down theroad.A police officer pulls over a speeding car. Theofficer says, ' I clocked you at 80 miles per hour,sir.'The driver says, 'Gee, officer I had it on cruisecontrol at 60, perhaps your radar gun needscalibrating. 'While staring out the passenger window the wifesays: 'Now don't be silly dear, you know that thiscar doesn't have cruise control.'As the officer writes out the ticket, the driverlooks over at his wife and growls, 'Can't you pleasekeep your mouth shut for once?'The wife smiles demurely and says, 'You should bethankful your radar detector went off when it did.'As the officer makes out the second ticket for theillegal radar detector unit, the man glowers at hiswife and says through clenched teeth, 'Damit,woman, can't you keep your mouth shut?'The officer frowns and says, 'And I notice thatyou're not wearing your seat belt, sir. That's anautomatic $75 fine'The driver says, 'Yeah, well, you see officer, I had iton, but took it off when you pulled me over so thatI could get my license out of my back pocket.'The wife says, 'Now, dear, you know very well thatyou didn't have your seat belt on. You never wearyour seat belt when you're driving.'And as the police officer is writing out the thirdticket the driver turns to his wife and barks, 'WHYDON'T YOU PLEASE SHUT UP??'The officer looks over at the woman and asks,'Does your husband always talk to you this way,Ma'am?''Only when he's been drinking'.


OPEN DAILY (INCLUDING HOLIDAYS)Mon-Sat 8am-10pm Sundays 8am-8pm

Everything you need from snacks to supper!Delivery Service Available!

Calle Principal, Costambar (just inside the gate)809-970-3028

Karaoke TropicalFor Any Event Of Your Choice

With Animation inEnglish, Spanish, German and French

Lyrics in 7 LanguagesInternational Music, Videos and DVDs

809-204-4172Email [email protected]

SOUND RENTAL

CLEAR FIBERGLASS7 GALLON

PROPANE CYLINDER TANK24 TALL & 12 DIAMETERTanks & valves are brand new

Made in the USAAlways know how much gas

you get or have left!Lightweight & rustproof!ONLY RD$2500

CALL COLIN AT 809-449-1819

I'm the life of the party..... Even if it lasts until8 p.m.I'm very good at opening childproof caps.....With a hammer.I'm awake many hours before my body allowsme to get up.I'm smiling all the time because I can't hear a thingyou're saying.I'm sure everything I can't find is in a safe secureplace, somewhere.I'm wrinkled, saggy, lumpy, and that's just my leftleg.I'm beginning to realize that aging is not forwimps.Yes, I'm a SENIOR CITIZEN and I think I amhaving the time of my life!


CMS DEFINITELY NOT THE NEWS!Because rumour, gossip, hearsay and anecdotes are just sooo much more fun!

Welcome to a new feature were going to test drive! Its basically going to be tidbits about life here on theNorth Coast. Things that affect us. Things that amuse us. Things that annoy us. None of it is hard corejournalism. Its what weve heard, seen and experienced. Feel free to email us [email protected] with updates, clarifications, corrections or whatever.And keep in mind - we are not claiming that this is the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth! Itsjust a glimpse of whats happening and sometimes a bit of fun! Dont take it too seriously!

POWER PLAYJulys power was pretty much as scheduled byEdenorte - give or take a few hours here and there.The interesting thing is that given the hellish situationwith power in May, the Edenorte website indicatesthat they gave power to us 72.21% of the time. Had tobe the two holidays during the month when we didhave power almost 24 hours that brought that rateup!

ELECTRIC CIRCUS!Based on real newsIt turns out Haiti is interested in buying power fromthe D.R.!! Sure they dont want the overabundance ofchicken and eggs that this country produces but theydo want the one thing this country comes nowherenear producing enough of! If theres a few kilowattsjust hanging around looking for a home then sendthem our way!In related news, the government has said there is noend in sight to the energy crisis and declared it anational emergency.Now, everyone who keeps asking us when we thinkCostambar is getting 24 hour power - dont hold yourbreath!

NO FLY ZONE?A reliable source has informed us that theconstruction going on near the entrance toCostambar (behind Yennys) is actually intended to beaffordable housing. Darn! The helicopter pad rumourwas just so much more fun!

TRASH TALK!Meetings have been held this month to try andresolve this issue of the price of garbage collection.According to sources, the first meeting didnt go aswell as hoped. But the second meeting, held a fewdays later yielded better results. APC and members ofthe community left the meeting feeling moreoptimistic that the rate negotiations would bring usmore in line with other Puerto Plata communities.They also broached the subject of APC possibly beingallowed to renew their contract for tipping at thelocal dump and thus being allowed to offer garbagecollection again. The results of the rate negotiationswith the Ayuntamiento will be announced on thesecond Wednesday of July.

INSULATOR INSTALLATIONThings are progressing with the rewiring ofCostambar. Crews are currently installing bracketswith insulators to our pretty new poles.Unfortunately, in order to accomplished this theyhave done a hatchet job on our greenery. Plenty ofold growth trees look like they have been struck bylightening with jagged and raw branches hacked offwith no consideration. Sadly, it also appears that anumber of palm trees have had their centre spikechopped sentencing them to certain death. I guess itslucky that things grow so quickly here. Hopefully, itwont be long before new growth hides the woundscreated by this. With any luck in our next issue wellbe gushing over new wires!CM FAQCOSTAMBAR MONTHLY TAKES A BREAKThere will be no issue printed in August. Its been a long time since we took an issue off and since things arevery quiet here on the North Coast right now it just seems like the perfect time to get away and get refreshedfor the coming season. But well be back bright eyed and bushy tailed in September! Enjoy your summereveryone!


VIVERO MAIMONGREEN THUMB

Landscaping and Gardening Maintenance Services

Palms, Flowering and Foliage PlantsBEST PRICES ON THE NORTH COAST!!!

OPENMonday to Friday 8am-5pm

Saturday 8am-noon

George Roesch809-543-8041 Km 11Carretera PP-Imbert

Just pastThe Fish Places

Son:"Daddy, I fell in love & want to date thisawesome girl!"Father: "That's great son. Who is she?"Son: "It's Sandra, the neighbor's daughter"Father: "Ohhh I wish you hadn't said that.I have to tell you something son, but you mustpromise not to tell your mother. Sandra is actuallyyour sister."The boy is naturally bummed out, but a couple ofmonths later ...Son: "Daddy, I fell in love again and she is evenhotter!"Father: "That's great son. Who is she?"Son: "It's Angela, the other neighbor's daughter."Father: "Ohhhh I wish you hadn't said that. Angelais also your sister."This went on couple of times and the son was somad, he went straight to his mother crying.Son:"Mum I am so mad at dad! I fell in love with sixgirls but I can't date any of them because dad istheir father!"The mother hugs him affectionately and says: "Mylove, you can date whoever you want. Don't listento him. He isn't your father."


Costambar Monthly classified ads are free but can only beplaced by emailing [email protected] calling 809-970-7507 or 809-449-1820PLEASE NOTE - free classified ads are only for personal items.Commercial properties or enterprises (including realestate sales or rentals) must purchase an ad. Classifieds willusually be run for one month only unless we are otherwisenotified.

IGLESIA FILIPOS PRESBITERIANA invites you toservices every Sunday at 10 A.M. Worships are inSpanish. Children activities. Before Costambar GateSecurity, turn on the right side toward the powerplant, 100 meters on the right side.

LIKE CHECKING OUT THE CLASSIFIEDS FOR GREAT DEALS? ORUSING THEM TO GET RID OF YOUR UNWANTED ITEMS? THENWHY NOT CHECK OUT COSTAMBARS FLEA MARKET AT THECATAMARAN BAR ON THE BEACH. EVERY LAST SATURDAY OFTHE MONTH STARTING AT 10AM! FREE TO VENDORS!!

CLASSIFIEDS

FOR SALEdinghy caribe 13 feet with latte800$ both are negotiableUS Microwave oven GE, comboconvection and grill oven,stainless steel inside andout,rack for grilling and broiling200$Boat stereo 30$Wet suit 30$Life jacket 10$Snorkels 5$Dog vest 20$Fire extinguisher 10$Power cord 30$50 to 30 adapter 100$Fishing poles (3)80$ eachJoanne 829-319-0572 or e-mail:[email protected]

FOR SALEI have a red 2007 X-1000motorcycle with 3,125 km onthe odometer. GL150GY-3Aengine. It has always been

FOR SALE2002 Izuzu Rodeo Sport, V6,Power windows/lock. NewFront brakes/rotors/calipers.Good tires and drives great.American owned.AskingRD$245,500 Call 829-397-2772

Costambar CommunityCenter & LibraryOpen 9am-5pm

Monday-SaturdayLocated next to

the Farmacia

Separate English &foreign language

book rooms

FOR SALEEverything must go. Sellingbaby, child, adult and homeitems. Items include: crib,queen and twin bed, fridge,oven, washer/drier, homedecor, tv, appliances and muchmore. Please email [email protected] or call849-860-6988.

FOR SALEHotpoint full capacity washer.Beige. Works well. RD $6,000.Call 829.259.3413 or [email protected]

FOR SALEMovie projector system formovie screen size RD$12000.Pfaff sewing machine, heavyduty, needs repair RD$5000. 2flat screens RD$1000. PrinterRD$1000. Keyboard RD$500.DVD players, need repairRD$200each. Amplifier, needsrepair RD$200.Radio antennaeRD$50. Yagie satelliteantennae RD$500. Ziar satellitesystem RD2000. Raycor oilfilters RD$200each.Motorcyclehelmets RD$250each. YamahaEnduro outboard motor, lowhours RD$450000. Utilitytrailer, 2002, snmb wgt 497lbs,low miles RD$20000. HondaHero 150 motorcycleRD$35000.Call 809-743-75125 or809-836-8523

FOR SALEHonda CRV 2000 forRD$255,000 Diane & VictorCall 809 261 3795

FOR SALEComplete contents of apt.Everything almost new & goodquality. Call John 829-560-7578

FOR SALE3 Solar panels 1 x 12 volt 65-80watt Broken/repairable (crackedglass) fully functional, 2 x 6 volt 1 Broken/repairable (crackedglass) fully functional 90 USD the Three.Prototype Solar/Wind charge controller, fully functional, 12/24volt 100 amp 90 USD1 Inverter PURE SINEWAVE 24 volt 2000/4000 watt voltageregulator integrated 1 year old 18,000 pesos.1 electric wing mirror for L200, 1500 pesos.2 x Ikea silver LED bedside/ office lamps 30 Usd each.Telephone 809 970 32 87 or 809 639 9393.

FOR SALEYamaha jog black and yellowids,new tires, new battery,special muffler,top shapeasking 18,000 [email protected]

FOR SALEMitsubishi L200 Pickup, 2001,Diesel, Manual, New Tires,shock absorbers and manyother parts. 7000 USDviewable in Costambar. Email:[email protected] Tel:809 970 3287 Cell 809 639


LAND FOR SALEBeautiful lot just a couple of minutesfrom the Star Market in Puerto Plata.750 square metres, quiet road, nice

neighbourhood.Mountain view and harbour views.Spectacular view of the city lights

at night.

APARTMENT FOR RENTLocated Cafemba

Main streetLong term rental

1bdrmFurnished

Inverter powerWell waterPoolside

WiFi, Utils included

[email protected]

829-906-7012

APARTMENTFOR RENT

3 bedroom3 bathroom

24 hour electric, waterSwimming pool

Located in Las Rocas,Cofresi

Only long term rentalsUS$600 per month

Call 809-993-4503

SOMETHING YOU DIDNTREALIZE ACTUALLY

HAD A NAME!

Documents

Costambar Monthly July 2013