Hate it or love it, we all have it: conflict styles

Hello!I am Ilyssa PadridPreferred Pronouns: She/Her/HersB. A. Public Health Policy, Queer Studies Minor @ University of California, IrvineM. Ed. College Student Affairs Administration @ University of Georgia

Where do you see conflict as

a leader?

Conflict is normal!

How comfortable are you in handling conflict?

What factors help mold how

you handle conflict?

1.take Conflict styles

questionnaire2.Add up your

scores3.Find out your top

style

animal

Style A: the turtle (denial or withdrawing)× Withdraw into shell to avoid conflict× Easier than facing it

× Stay away from issues & people in conflict with

× Feel helpless× Give up personal goals & relationships× Believe it is hopeless to try & resolve

conflicts

Style b: the shark (forcing or overpowering)× Try to overpower opponents× Goals highly important to them;

Relationships minor importance× Seek to achieve their goals at all costs× Not concerned w the needs of others× Conflicts are either won or lost× Winning conflicts gives sense of pride & achievement× Losing gives sense of weakness & failure× Try and win by overpowering, overwhelming &

intimidating others

Style c: the teddy bear (smoothing & suppressing)× Relationship of great importance;Own goals of little importance

× Want to be accepted & liked by other people× Conflict should be avoided in favor of harmony

× People cannot discuss conflicts w/o damaging relationships

× Afraid if conflict continues, someone will get hurt & ruin relationship

× Give up own goals to preserve relationship× Like to smooth things over

Style d: the fox(compromising or negotiating)× Moderately concerned w own goals &

relationships w others× Give up part of their own goals× Persuade others to give up part of their

goals× Seek conflict solution where both sides

benefit×Middle ground b/w two extreme

positions× Compromise in order to find agreement

for the common good

Style e: the owl(confronting or collaborating)× Highly value own goals & relationships× View conflicts as problems to be solved

× Means of improving relationships× Seeks solution to maintain relationships× Try to begin discussion that identifies

conflict× Not happy until solution is found

1.Break up into your dominant conflict

styles 2.List pros & cons of

dominant conflict styles

3.Come up with a 30 sec. Skit of conflict

style in action

Pros &

Appropriate× Need a cooling

off period× Nothing to gain

by resolving conflict

× Severe inequity in power

When to be the turtleInappropriate× Conflict is

important & will continue to build

Appropriate× Agreed to

approach before hand

× Limited time× Low stakes issue× Don’t need buy-in

When to be the sharkInappropriate× Others have no

way to express needs

× Trying to develop other leaders or a team envi.

Appropriate× Need to preserve

relationship× Want to elevate

another person’s status, ideas, or self-image

When to be the bearInappropriate× If smoothing over

leads to evading the issue

× Trying to establish self as leader

Appropriate× Both parties

better off w compromise than attempting win/lose stance

× Both parties ready to seek middle ground

When to be the foxInappropriate× Solution too

watered down× Commitment by

both parties is doubtful

Appropriate× Need creative

solutions to complex issues

× Parties committed to approach

× “Us” vs “problem” not “we” vs “they”

× Sufficient time to resolve conflict

When to be the owlInappropriate× Lack of:

× Time× Abilities × Commitment

The ideal conflict styleThe Five Principles of Conflict

Resolution

1.Separate the people from the problem

2.Focus on

interests, not positions

3.Generate

options for mutual gain

4.Assure a fair

process

5.Practice direct communication

s

The ideal conflict style summary1.Separate the people from the problem

2.Focus on interests, not positions3.Generate options for mutual gain4.Assure a fair process5.Practice direct communications

It’s ok to ask for help!

THANKS!Any questions? Comments? Concerns?You can e-mail me at jipadrid@uga.edu