CHAPTER VII - MARRIAGE AND FAMILY › wzukusers › user-19310781 › documents...He got the ‘piano’ bit right, one out of three. OUR MARRIAGE - 24th November that year, 1956

My Life - Marriage and Family 49

CHAPTER VII - MARRIAGE AND FAMILY

In January 1956 between holidays, while I was staying in Christchurch at a private Bed and

Breakfast Hotel, The New Windsor, I met a man who took an interest in me and who was to

become my husband! This is how it happened.

I was playing the piano in the Hotel lounge after church while waiting for dinner-time. When

I stopped, a young man came up to me and asked if I’d like to go with him to Hanmer. Well,

I’d always wanted to go to Hanmer because I’d heard what a wonderful place it was with its

hot springs, some of them sulpher pools and many went there to soak up the benefits to help

their aching joints.

But hey, I’d never spoken to this chap before or even noticed him so I asked him how he was

going. He said ‘on his motorbike’! Well, golly, no way! A strange man and a motorbike! Not

for me. So I said, ‘Thanks, but no. I was thinking of going out to the New Brighton Beach’.

Then in a few minutes this other man came over and said he’d heard me say I was going to

the beach, and so was he in his car so would I like a ride. Woops, another stranger. He later

said we had been at the same breakfast table a couple of times. I hadn’t noticed. BUT, I

accepted the ride and later, off we went in his little sports car. Well, it didn’t turn out as he’d

thought, like lying on the sand talking. I was a surf lifesaver and I was off into the breakers as

soon as I was changed! Water is for swimming in, including the surf. He only liked on it.

After tea he asked me if I’d like to go with him to visit some friends of his family. Actually,

he hadn’t planned to visit them, but wanted to take me somewhere and not just off in his car.

But I told him I would be going to church so he offered to drop me off. This was to find out

which church I belonged to as his mother had told her children (Baptists) not to bring home a

Roman Catholic! Actually his brother Ken married one and they had a long and happy

marriage. But that was in the days when mixed marriages were frowned on – they didn’t

always work out very well.

He was happy to find I was a Presbyterian. We went out a few times that week prior to my

crossing Cook Strait on the InterIsland Ferry to attend a Registered Music Teacher’s

Conference in Wellington, then travel on to stay with a past Conference friend, Barbara, who

was living in Wairoa, just north of Gisborne, with her husband and little boy.

David George Holding, almost a year younger than I, was a NZ Merchant Seaman who was

‘between ships’. He had signed off from his last trip, to visit his parents in Invercargill

because his mum was ill. He was now expected to drive to the Port of Lyttleton each day to

sign on for the next trip requiring a 2nd

Engineer, his ranking at that time. He managed to

delay that till the day I left for Wellington. He did seem a very pleasant, decent young man.

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David had become a Merchant seaman 8 years before when he was 19 and had travelled to

many places, including England from where both his parents had immigrated a few years

before he was born. They came from Liverpool. David had worked as a Second Engineer on

steam ships when coal was still shovelled into the fires. He also had to polish railings and

scrub out tanks. Some of his work was on oil tankers and now he was off for three months on

coastal ships round NZ and Australia. We promised to write, and this we did. I returned to

Dunedin to start that year’s piano teaching and choir at the end of January.

Airmail letters continued to arrive till the end of April when David “signed off” that ship and

stayed in Dunedin where he found a job as a butcher. He had become a qualified butcher

while still in Invercargill. He met my family, then in my term holiday week in May David

took me to Invercargill to meet the Holding families for a few days. His parents, a brother and

three sisters lived there. By then we had fallen love and before we left Invercargill he bought

me an engagement ring, a triple diamond in a diagonal setting. Then we went to tell his family

before returning to mine. I took my ring off so that David could ask my father for “my hand in

marriage”. It was rather funny, we often teased David later, because there was a power failure

that evening and he had to ask by candlelight. Then I brought out the ring. My parents, as his,

and families, were very pleased and we were each welcomed into our new families.

Doreen Gilchrist and David Holding – happy engaged couple


David’s account of our meeting – an extract from his Testimony

“One day in a New Zealand port you meet this really beautiful girl…and you start up a

conversation with her. And you ask her to go out with you on the Sunday morning, because,

you see, I had this little Morris Roadster that I used to keep garaged in Lyttleton and when I

was in Port it was beaut to be able to just jump in the car and go where I wanted. Anyway

you find out that this girl you’ve got interested in is going to church – yes well… But you

offer to take her there and meet her afterwards…for lunch. So begins a letter writing

campaign after you have had to say goodbye because you’re sailing for Australia. And you

woo the lady by letter…O boy, could I write letters in those days. So the weeks and months go

by and finally the big day comes and you get married and begin to settle down ashore and

you once again get a job in a butcher shop…And somehow God…and the church…begin to

take a fairly prominent place in your life…” Another quote from something David said:

“David’s mother once said that when David was young he said he wanted to marry a girl

with a fur coat, a piano and false teeth.” He got the ‘piano’ bit right, one out of three.

OUR MARRIAGE - 24th November that year, 1956.

We were married in the Kaikorai Presbyterian Church where I had been a member since my

teenage years and had attended since a baby. My parents, both my brothers and later my sister

were married there. Our reception was held in the newly opened Kaikorai Bowling Club

Pavilion, in School Street, on the far side of the park in Nairn Street, at the bottom of Jellicoe

Crescent where I lived. It’s interesting that this Bowling Green is opposite Eton Street, where

David stayed when he came with the Invercargill Brigadiers soccer team to play in

competitions when he was young.

With Mum’s and Aunty Grace’s help, I cut out and sewed my wedding gown, white

embossed satin, and we cut out the two bridesmaids’ gowns, apricot/pink embossed satin, for

our unmarried sisters, Margaret Gilchrist and Jean Holding. One evening when it was getting

late and we were all rather tired Mum made a cup of tea for us and Aunty Grace and brought

it to where we were cutting out the material on the kitchen table. Somehow one cup was

tipped over and, ‘help’, it soaked into a front panel of one of the bridesmaids’ frocks. We

managed to wash or sponge the material and there didn’t seem to be any stain left so we

didn’t ever mention this to Margaret or Jean.

We decided to have a flowergirl, and thinking the age was right, chose Raewyn, age 6,

daughter of David’s youngest sister Dot (Dorothy) who was married to Walter Harrison (from

the Stewart Island Harrisons). We chose a pale blue for her. They looked really great in these

frocks as part of our wedding party. The bridesmaids’ bouquets were ‘Shot Silk” roses to

match their frocks but a deaper shade. Of note here I can mention that it was a real thrill 24

years later when our daughter Sharon, wore my wedding gown and veil (with slight

alterations of style) for her own wedding, in the same church.

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The day of our wedding

was fine and sunny and we

were all excited and

nervous. Dad took photos

of us in our front garden

beside the lilac tree. We

were anxious when the

taxis had not arrived on

time and went down the

path to our gate to look

down the street. We saw

the front of one wedding

taxi parked opposite the

end of the street and

wondered why. Soon,

Alwyn McKenzie, my

friend Myrtle’s husband,

and his mate arrived at our place explaining that the second car had broken down but had now

been fixed. So the bride arrived late!

It was a wonderful time, walking down the aisle in my wedding gown with Dad looking so

proud and Mum, our family and aunts, uncles and friends looking on. Rev Reid Harper our

Kaikorai minister took the ceremony and Margaret sang a solo. When I was asked “do you,

Doreen, take this man, David William Holding, as your husband?” I hesitated and wondered

if I should actually say “Yes” – because, actually, William was the first name of David’s

father. I was marrying David George Holding. I wondered if it mattered so rather than make a

fuss I said “Yes”, and so we became man and wife. As we stopped for photos on the steps at

the door of the church I was presented with horseshoes from neices Gail and Paula.

A big surprise for me was that somebody had

arranged for the girls and boys in my Kaikorai

Choir, “The Merry Musicmakers” to form a Guard

of Honour for us. They were dressed in their

uniforms of brown skirts or shorts and yellow

blouses or shirts. As we came down from the steps

at the entrance to the church after photos had been

taken they held up large cardboard shapes of music

notes and signs; crotchets, quavers, treble and bass

clefs with ribbons and painted them brown or

yellow for us to walk through. That was really

special.

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Doreen with Mum and Dad Doreen – now Mrs David Holding

(Maggie & Jim Gilchrist)

Not long before, I had been asked to sing a solo at the wedding of a friend - Bill Jenkinson

who studied singing with the same teacher as me. Bill and Zelie were members of the Roman

Catholic Church, whose members at that time were forbidden to enter or attend services in

churches of other Christian denominations, but anyone was welcomed in theirs. I sang (in

Latin as requested) Panis Angelicus (O Lord Most Holy) standing in the loft beside the organ

at the back of the church in South Dunedin.

When we asked Bill to sing at our wedding he was pleased to do this but had to explain the

above, and we all agreed that he would sing at the Dance after our Reception. Because this

was the only item, and newly marrieds are too excited to remember everything planned,

although we had asked the dance band pianist to accompany Bill - we forgot about the item!!!

Bill came and spoke to us just before 11 pm saying they would have to leave soon after 11 pm

to catch the last bus to Broad Bay down the far side of our harbour. We just said we were

sorry they had to leave early and thanked them for coming.

Part way through our honeymoon, while in Nelson or Picton, I suddenly realised that we’d

forgotten about Bill’s solo and sent Bill a telegram of apology!!! What a dreadful thing to do

to a friend. We were so embarrassed.

We enjoyed a wonderful honeymoon touring round the Queen Charlotte Sounds, a place we

had not previously visited. We spent one day rowing round the bays in a small boat without

life-jackets. Nobody thought of life-jackets in those days. And David was not a swimmer! We


toured around other lovely places in Nelson and surrounding areas then finished our

honeymoon with a few days in Invercargill with David’s family before we settled in Dunedin.

We lived for six months in a very small flat with a bedroom, small lounge and tiny kitchenette

with a small gas oven. There was hardly room for two people in the kitchenette at once. This

was at 76 York Place, opposite KETC where I had attended High School. David worked as a

butcher at John Robertson’s Family Butcher in George Street. This was one of a chain of

shops run by the Robertson family, the main one being in Kaikorai Valley Road near where I

lived. I caught the tram or bus (?) to Roslyn/Kaikorai a few days a week to continue my piano

teaching and choir till mid year. There were no children allowed to live in these flats, so when

I became pregnant we had to look for somewhere else to live.

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OUR OWN FIRST HOME 28 Adderley Terrace, Ravensbourne, West Harbour, Dunedin.

We had not saved much money and used it all,

£300 (pounds) half each, for a deposit on a

£2,200 house in the outlying suburb of

Ravensbourne, on the west side of our harbour

on the road to Port Chalmers. This house had

been built for the previous Mayor, a Mr Taylor.

It was a sound wooden house over a large

basement as it was built on a section which

sloped up steeply from the gate. It was a block up

the hill from where this street branched off the

main road from what was known as the Hotel Corner. The back of this quarter acre section

was terraced and grass and garden so badly overgrown (about three feet, or one metre) that it

was hard to decide what was sloping and

what terraced. We eventually worked that

out when we started clearing the section.

The shift was made at Queen’s Birthday Weekend

1957, the first weekend of June. The house had

been empty three months and David had to clean

up the inside with the help of family and friends,

and shift in without me, his wife, into our first home as on the Friday, six months pregnant, I

had been taken by ambulance to spend the weekend in hospital, and was not allowed home till

I gave my doctor a “Yes” to his question “Have they shifted that piano yet?” on the Monday

or Tuesday.

GEOFFREY DAVID, our first baby was born on 8th September 1957 weighing 8 lb 15 oz. As I had passed the due date and had developed

toxaemia it was decided I should be admitted to Queen

Mary Maternity Hospital to ‘bring on’ our baby. But,

first, as my junior choir from Kaikorai, “The Merry

Music Makers” were to sing in the Dunedin

Competitions on that Wednesday night, with my sister

Margaret conducting them for me, I was ‘allowed’ to go

to hear them perform first. I think by this time David had

become the Shop Manager at Robertson’s, holding this

position till we bought our own shop. It was lovely

being parents but it was also a new learning time for us. We enjoyed watching our first little

baby grow and looked forward to when he would have brothers or sisters.


SHARON DOREEN was born about the due date, on 7

th July 1959, with long, dark, curly hair, more like a very

little girl than a baby. She was a little heavier than

Geoffrey but in contrast, had a quite small appetite. In

those days, babies were weighed, clothed and wrapped,

just before and just after feeding, to determine how many

ounces they had taken from each feed. Eight ounces

was the expected average amount per feed. As Geoffrey

had always taken at least that, we were concerned even after we were home, that Sharon’s

amounts were shown as between one and three ounces. But after keeping her up longer and

trying to compliment my feeds with bottle milk, it was decided she was just a small eater,

nothing to worry about. Our four children were very healthy and loved their food.

In those years babies were all kept in the ‘baby nursery’ and only brought to their mothers for

feeding and bathing. Mothers and babies stayed in the Maternity Hospital for two weeks for

the first baby, then about 10 days for others and mothers were not allowed out of bed for the

first few days. By 2000 many stayed only 24 hours and some have their babies at home. In

our day our own doctor delivered our babies if he was a maternity doctor but many these days

have a midwife instead. We all took our babies to Plunket regularly to be weighed and

measured and checked up and all details kept in each child’s plunket book. These were handy

records to check and compare our children’s progress. This was a helpful facility for young

parents.

ROBERT JOHN took me by surprise by arriving three weeks early on 8

th February 1961. It was a VERY hot

day and I had spent time in the morning on my knees

trimming the edges of grass then in the late afternoon

picking peas from our bumper crop. I was thinking what

a back breaking job this was on such a hot day then

suddenly thought “but it’s only so sore now and then -

surely it can’t be labour pains”! But I realised it was so

rang a neighbour to look after our two children just as

David came home from work. It always pays to be

prepared!! Sharon had been sure she was going to have a

little baby sister but we said ‘maybe next time’.

Sharon, Robert, Geoffrey Geoffrey, Sharon Geoffrey, Robert, Sharon

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BRUCE MALCOLM was born on 25th October, 1962, Labour Weekend, and we had to call my doctor in from his holiday house at Taieri

Mouth, 30-40 minutes on the coast south of Dunedin. It was all very quick

as I was woken up about 5.30 am, got up, and while waiting to determine

how the labour pains were progressing, I started on the ironing, then rang

Queen Mary Hospital, who said to come in, so I rang a taxi. Then I woke

David who, this, the only time, had to stay with the children to get them up

for breakfast and school, while I went by taxi. Bruce was born fairly soon

after we arrived, with no time for preparation. Bruce was the only one who

did not have dark hair when born, in fact he had very little fair hair for a

while. When we said to the nurses that ‘he didn’t look like one of ours’

they replied ‘but he sounds like one of yours. He has good lungs like the

other three’.

We had decided we’d like a family of four and since we were 28 and 29 when we married

thought a bit less than two years between would be good. Our plans worked out well. We now

had our family of four children but with only five years from oldest to youngest it was a busy

life. About six years of nappies, babies crying, crawling and learning to walk then talk.

Because of our large sloping section we had to have barriers up to keep the children round

the back area where I could keep an eye on them. Being so close in age the four children were

able to often enjoy playing the same games together and at other times the two youngest

played something different.

Geoffrey, Bruce, Robert, Sharon Lunch in the backyard on a sunny day

EVENING ORCHESTRA I had continued playing each Friday night and had taken Geoffrey, first in the pram, in the bus to Mum and Dad’s for the evening meal, where they

had looked after him till David came up after he finished work, some time after 9 pm, the

time orchestra finished, and drove us home. After Sharon was born it time to leave the

orchestra. I was given a good wishes send off after my last concert with them, and presented

with a lovely crystal dish. A year or so later I sold my cello to help pay the price of a kit-set

couch.

KINDERGARTEN The nearest, called Kelsey Yarrella, was in the north end of Dunedin, beside the banks of The Leith, so this was where I took the children from about age three, by

bus, because I did not learn to drive till about the time Sharon was four, a while before Bruce

was born. It was quite a busy time getting three young children into a bus (Geoffrey had

started school six weeks before Bruce was born) and sometimes when buses were not at the

time I wanted to take just two children into Dunedin I walked along the then gravel footpath,


pushing the pram with one sitting on the front. This took half an hour. I found this was also

the best way to walk up the hill home, rather than trying to hold the hands of one walking

beside me while pushing the pram. Actually, looking back, it seemed easier to put the

children onto the bus and carry the baby on, than to get them all into the car.

CARS, SEAT BELTS At that time car seat belts were not in use and there were no ‘baby seats’ so that a baby was tucked into a carrycot which was put on the back seat. A car seat for

a small child was just fitted over the back of the front seat (in our car, a long bench seat)

facing forward. This of course was a very dangerous position as there were no straps to hold it

secure and if there was a sudden stop the seat and child would be thrown through the

windscreen. The child WAS strapped into this seat. Once as we drove round a corner the

carrycot fell off the back seat but the baby stayed firmly tucked in and didn’t fall out.

It was not until our children were 14, 12, 11 and 9 yrs, in 1972, that car seat belts were

compulsory for the driver and front passenger but often folk only ‘buckled up’ when they got

into town where they knew they could be ‘caught’ and fined. In an accident, anyone sitting in

that front middle seat could be thrown through the windscreen. We were very fortunate that

year when we had a terrible head-on collision - but we’ll come to that later.

PRIMARY SCHOOL To go back to those earlier years. When each child turned five years they started at the local Ravensbourne School. This was a good school with good

teaching staff where our children made many friends and we made good friends with many

parents. The classes went to Standard IV then pupils moved on to an Intermediate School

from about age 11 yrs for Forms I and II. While our children were attending this school there

was a lot of fund raising to build a lovely heated swimming pool on the school grounds. Then

more fund raising to put a roof over it. Families could pay to hold a key to give them entry to

the pool out of school hours. Some years later, David became the Chairman of the Board at

the time they planned, then built, a new school.

CHILDREN’S HEALTH Our children were strong and healthy coming through all the usual childhood sicknesses and throat infections over a period of 18 months. Also Geoffrey

had several bouts of gland trouble, resulting once in Glandular Fever, then Pleurisy and

Pneumonia when he was six, with a few very anxious days while he was in hospital. They had

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all just been through English measles, Geoffrey and Sharon quite badly. That same day

Sharon had to be given Penicillin for a similar but less severe sickness, and thankfully, like

when she had the same medicine for severe tonsillitis attacks, it worked very fast for her. She

eventually had her tonsils removed. The only other major problems were for Geoffrey and

years later Robert, when they had to have operations to clear tissue and bone obstruction from

their nasal passages. Very unpleasant experiences! For Geoffrey’s first time it was chiselled,

later twice and for Robert once, drilled.

CHURCH AND NEIGHBOURS We continued attending the Kaikorai Church for a while before joining the West Harbour Parish which had churches at Ravensbourne and

further along the harbour, St Leonards. We lived in a lovely friendly neighbourhood of

families, being a real caring community. Most of the families living in the two blocks away

either side, were Methodists, Congregationalists, Anglicans and Roman Catholics. We all

attended each other’s church fairs etc, and our children attended the same local school, except

perhaps some who attended a Roman Catholic school in the City. Next to us were Kathleen

and Martin Stevenson and their children Rodger and Elaine, just a few years older than

Geoffrey. Across the road were Margaret and Ron Lister eventually with four children much

the same age as our four. The Wings and Mannings lived further up, then Molly and Gordon

West moved into the section over the road, on the hairpin bend, with three children also much

the same age as ours.

There were others along Totara Street, and up the hill further the Simpsons, Tobins, Mitchells

and further along past the church were the Leiths and Garretts. Len and Joan Robinson shifted

into the house two-up from us, with Richard, Frank (same age as Geoffrey), then Grace and

Margaret. It was lovely for our children to have so many families living near by with children

much the same age to play with and know at school. Next up from them lived lovely Dorry

Key, a widow who often baby sat for us. A real family district which we missed years later

when we left in 1972.

DISTRICT Ravensbourne was a lovely district to live in, with the wide panorama of Dunedin’s lovely harbour in view from our home and from

most streets we

walked in round the

district, and as we

drove to town or in

Port Chalmers

direction. It was

against the hill,

sheltered from strong

winds. Often we saw

ships coming up or

down the harbour to The Port of Dunedin and once watched as The HMS Britania came up

the harbour when Queen Elizabeth II and Prince Philip visited Dunedin. There were often

many yachts on the harbour especially at competition time also rowing club practices.

Aunty Lena (Mum’s sister) and Uncle Alf lived at 712 Highgate in Maori Hill overlooking

the harbour and sometimes Uncle Alf would ring us up and say ‘take the children to watch

from your bedroom window and they’ll see a ship coming down the harbour. It’ll be there in a

few minutes because we can see it now’. Or he’d say ‘rush the children to the front window


because there’s a train will pass any minute now’. The

train line was on the narrow strip of land

between the main road and the harbour. This was, I

suppose, even more fun for our children than it

was for us when we were little to rush out when we

heard an aeroplane and look up to see if we could

see it in the sky overhead. while we shouted ‘plane’.

We really enjoyed our years in Ravensbourne; we

were very much in love and loved our children and

watching them grow and we had many friends near

by with young children near the age of ours. It

wasn’t far to drive to visit my parents or aunts and

uncles and my brothers’ families in Dunedin. But Margaret lived in Auckland then

Christchurch and all David’s family lived in Invercargill at the southern end of the South

Island. The most southerly part of New Zealand is Stewart Island which I didn’t get to visit

till almost retirement age.

BUTCHER’S SHOP In 1960 David bought the local family butcher’s shop on the main road, Ravensbourne Road, which ran along the

shore line from the city of Dunedin towards

Port Chalmers. It was 1-½ blocks down from

our home. At various times David employed

one to three butchers, including eventually our

eldest son Geoffrey, our nephew David

Harrison, Gordon West who lived opposite

and Doug Seque a close neighbour. The

business went very well although no small

business makes lots of money. But that is only

one of the important parts of running your own

business. It brought David in particular into close contact with most of the people living in the

area, and he also ran a delivery service to outlying areas further down the harbour in Maia and

Sawyers Bay.

But it WAS a struggle at times, with the long hours from rising at 6 am to start at 7 am Mon-

Tue-Wed and rising at 5 am to start at 6 am Thur-Fri. Both these nights were late finishing,

with David not home till about 9.30 or 10 pm and not seeing his children from Wednesday

night till Saturday morning. In summer I often spent an hour in the garden before the children

woke. In winter I spent that time sewing.

As the coolers were not ‘self re-setting’ following any power failures, it was his habit to go to

the shop some time every Saturday and Sunday to ‘check the coolers’. There was also tidying

up of the shop and sometimes extra smallgoods to be made, especially in the sports seasons

when ‘take-away’ shops rang for additional large orders for visiting teams in the weekend,

mainly wanting sausages, saveloys or mince, all of which had to be processed, then, another

‘clean up session’ of machinery.

SECOND SHOP At one stage, when Glendermid’s Tannery in Sawyers Bay (just before Port Chalmers) planned to build 600 new houses for a new enlarged work place, we were

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given the first option to open a second shop in that area since we were doing the delivery run

that far, actually, at that time in a ‘hawking van’ - not refrigerated, but people came from their

homes to the van to ‘choose’ their meat. [For a few years there was also a fruit and vege van

man coming round in a hawking van.] So we took a two year lease on a shop and painted and

set up the power, telephone and one man on manager’s wages, BUT the folk just rang THAT

shop for their free deliveries AND the houses were never built anyway. SO we pulled out

after about one year and had to forfeit the remaining lease. Another learning curve. Like

loosing money when two different town shops, a restaurant and a ‘take-away’, ‘went broke

and closed shop’ owing all the trades people including us, a week’s money or more.

Then we had to put in a proper security door and wired shallow burglar proof windows after

being ‘caught out’ on discovering our insurance policy did not cover both burglary AND

theft. We thought they were the same. Even then, once two men actually sat on the roof and

kicked their boots to dislodge these windows in their frames, out of their surrounds and after

tossing them into the bushes, one went in and handed out through the opening, sides of

mutton and pork, rolls of ham and luncheon sausage for a hangi they planned.

FOOD AND CLOTHING But we ‘got there’ with enough to feed and clothe us, with me sewing or knitting most of the children’s clothes and some of David’s and mine including the

fittings, helped by my mother and my aunts. There was a series of books available at that

time, strangely by an Enid Gilchrist, no relation, for children’s clothes. They had charts for

drafting out the size and style you wanted, instead of buying shop patterns, and there was a

plentiful supply of lovely materials and wools in the shops to make up in our own choice of

styles. I spent long hours at the sewing machine in winter in these early hours after David left

for work, and through the long mornings till he came for lunch at 1 pm. A few too many cups

of coffee and chocolate biscuits were devoured on too many long mornings.

GARDEN In part of the large sloping and terraced section in the back area David dug a very large garden for our vegetables, plus rhubarb, gooseberries, black, red and white

currants, providing a plentiful supply of food. And I followed the tradition of the day of

making up to a hundred bottles of jam and the same of preserved fruit. Of course everybody

thought we ‘got our meat for nothing’. When we were first married my father used to supply

us with vegetables from his garden and David called him ‘coach’ because he helped us from

his experience. Then when Sharon and Phil married Phil also called David ‘coach’ for the

same reason, as we gave them, also Geoffrey and Jenny, vegetables from our garden. Later

when they each had great gardens they were offering to supply us from their crops.

The first year in our Ravensbourne home, after all David’s hard work of deep digging,

breaking up a large area of the back section, then planting rows and rows of seeds we were

having lunch one day when it was raining heavily. Suddenly we heard a great SWISHING

noise and rushed out to find a six feet long, by three feet wide and three feet deep section of

this area had ‘disappeared below’ into an underground stream we did not know was there.

Heart breaking!

There were other times we ‘lost’ bits of our garden in this way, smaller bits, like a couple of

shores of potatoes once. The council was never able to do anything about it. Once when

somebody had parked their car in the gutter in the street above, we had a cloud burst. This

caused torrents of water to rush down Stevenson’s section then cross into ours in a wide

sweep and some of it seemed to disappear underground then come up into the street below the


house across from us. Another time almost the whole width of the road outside our garage

just ‘went down’ like that piece of garden. We had warned the council about hearing what

sounded like water rushing under our section. It took two truck loads of rocks to fill that

hole!!! The council THEN put in an extra sump in the top street to help prevent this

happening again. When Geoffrey and Jenny lived up the hill in Ravensbourne they soon

discovered they had a very deep hole at the lower end of their section with an underground

stream and had to cover that with a large sheet of tin. One time a large section of road

collapsed in Ravensbourne near out shop. David had warned the council several times about

that possibility due in part from this water running down under the ground and the weight of

the many large trucks using the road each day.

David and I enjoyed the long hours in the garden but near Christmas David was too busy at

the shop to help. However he had done the hard digging and planting. Some of us with ¼ or

½ acre sections put a sheep or two on it tied up to eat the grass. Once we had a goat, but

found that the goat only enjoyed eating the hedge, not the grass. One year Martin Stevenson

next door, up the street, had two lambs which got loose through the night and had a wonderful

feed in our vegetable garden in its prime. I can still picture Martin standing on the ridge at the

hedge border line apologetically saying repeatedly, “Oh Dave, oh Dave, I’m so sorry, your

lovely garden. They’ll have to go.” They arranged for them to be killed that afternoon.

We had planned to spend the day at Lake Waihola, south of Dunedin so David drove us there

and after a relaxing morning, then lunch, David drove back to Dunedin leaving us to enjoy the

lake and the sun. Sharon went with him ‘to watch him kill the sheep’. I had no desire to

watch. While they were away I watched our three sons enjoy paddling and swimming in the

lake but suddenly Bruce, in shallow water at the edge, cried out in agony. He had stood on

some broken glass from a bottle somebody had carelessly thrown into the lake. He was badly

cut under two toes and almost fainted. We wrapped a towel round his foot and carried him to

a little ‘first aid hut’ where his foot was washed and bandaged. There were no doctors or

hospital at Waihola so we had to wait till David came back an hour or so later to drive us

back to Dunedin for proper attention. This had spoiled a lovely day and I felt especially sorry

for Bruce; he was in real pain. It all healed up well some days later.

We once had a sheep, heavy with wool, get loose and I had to go looking for it down the

street. Another time David heard one making weird noises late at night and realised that it had

reached the end of its rope after going round a tree and slipped down a small ridge and was

being strangled. He said he would have to go up right away to dig a large hole below there so

that he could roll it down to be buried before it stiffened because, the meat, wool and fleece of

a strangled sheep are no use. One year we had a little new lamb whose mother had died but

the weather became very nasty, cold and wet, and sadly this poor little lamb died.

We had flower gardens too, but less than for veges, and a lot of sloping lawn to cut. Later we

put in a shrubbery to replace the lawn by the steps on the slope beside the house since it was

suggested it would be easier to keep tidy with a push hoe and have less lawn to cut. We had

several hydranga and fuschia bushes and found it was easy to grow more from cuttings of

these to bring lots of colour from the extra bushes. The hedges along three sides were a

nuisance to keep tidy because they consisted of several different types of plant, including the

hawthorne which apart from having sharp thorns, grew very straggly.

64

Stevensons did their part helped by the two grandads but the house on the other side was

rented and not kept tidy so one of us often had to go round to their side to trim bits so that we

could reach to keep the top tidy. At one stage David had great trouble hacking and digging out

a twisty, strong springy plant from the hedge then rolled it to the flat top area and tried to burn

it. That didn’t work so he had to roll this down to the top of the garage at the bottom of the

section and onto a trailer to take to the tip. But, I guess it kept us fit and healthy being outside

so much, doing manual work in the sun and fresh air. As Stevensons said when we shifted in

“it’ll build strong leg muscles on your children” and it did.

Our home was a three bedroomed house with a kitchen/living room, a dining room and a

large lounge. These were all good sized rooms. When we shifted in, the dining room and hall

were panelled ¾ of the way up with lovely dark grained wood. But this made the dining room

very dark so quite soon we pulled its panelling off and painted the walls. As the panelling was

a lovely woodgrain we used it to line some doors.

We also demolished a big shed outside that room to let in more light. Then we dug out a bit

of the six foot high bank. We ordered a large supply of pre-mixed cement which was tipped

on the road outside our garage and my dad and David had to work fast to get that all spread

out over the area to made the space into a good sized backyard for the children to play in. I

think Bruce, quite young, insisted on taking turns pushing the wheelbarrow of cement up the

slope. The rotary clothes line was up on the bank and a few years later we dug out a better set

of steps up to there, and with Bruce and Sharon helping, this time we mixed out own cement.

On the southern side of our house was just a path going along past the lounge, front porch and

boys’ bedroom. This was the coolest side of the house. There was one summer when on a few

really very hot days we actually sat in the porch to get some shade while we ate lunch.

Opposite the porch the ground sloped up to the next section and, along the border at that point

were two very tall pine trees. Ivy grew twisting through one of these trees and in summer

there were masses of berries which the wasps liked. One year there was an abundance of

wasps and bees and the humid weather had made these all drowsy so many were crawling

along the ground in a drunken like state. They were thick along the other side of the house

meaning we couldn’t go up that path either. We had to cross nextdoor. At one time we found

a wasp nest in the bank up from our back yard and had this ‘killed’ by the council. Two other

times we watched at sunset to see where the wasps were heading off to and traced one lot to a

nest in a street further up and another to an area of the zigzag going up the top of Wanaka

Street from Totara Street corner. Both these times it was the council paid to get these

fumigated.

To get some more light through the front porch windows David and I hired a long ‘push-me

pull-me’ saw to saw one pine tree down. We tied a block and tackle round it and got Martin

Stevenson to secure this firmly round a strong tree on his section up from that area. Well,

David and I worked hard sawing until we had sawed right through this massive trunk – but

the tree held firm balancing on its base. We got Martin to adjust the block and tackle pressure

to force the tree to fall his way. But – that didn’t happen. Instead, it fell downwards into our

porch just missing breaking the window, which was very fortunate because it was made of

multi frames of bulged glass which was hard to replace. So now it was a big job sawing up

this massive tree. The other advantage on top of more light was a good pile of firewood for

two families.


It was not until we had lived in this

house for several years that we were

able to paint the outside and when this

was done in two tone it looked really

great. Instead of directing friends to

the ‘unpainted house’ we could now

tell them to look for the modern

looking two-toned freshly painted

house. Then we had the kitchen

remodelled, replacing the old

fashioned wall-to-ceiling cupboards all

along one wall with a more modern

style and matching sink bench

cupboards. Not long before we moved out of this house we at last got round to carpeting the

boys’ bedroom and the hall and Sharon helped paint and paper her bedroom. We also painted

the bathroom and put vinyl on that floor plus vinyl tyles on kitchen and dining room floors.

INTERMEDIATE AND HIGH SCHOOLS When Geoffrey finished Primary School he attended the Dunedin North Intermediate School (DNI) for two years then began Otago

Boys High School. Sharon attended her first Intermediate year at DNI.

Ready for Sunday School

CHILDREN’S TEEN YEARS Our children enjoyed cycling to school, tennis, swimming and for some, gymnastics. It was a bit scarey for us when they first were allowed

to ride along the main road in Ravensbourne because there were so many huge logging trucks

took that route to Port Chalmers and many other trucks and buses as well as a heavy traffic

flow of private cars. At one stage Geoffrey ran a gymnastic club in Ravensbourne. They also

had their Girls’ and Boys’ Brigade activities and Bible Class. Geoffrey, Sharon and Bruce

enjoyed a lot of walking and so did I, round the district or on holidays. The boys played

soccer, Bruce also played basketball and Sharon played netball.

66

While we were still in Ravensbourne it became a habit on Sunday mornings after church for

David and our four children to watch English soccer games on TV while I was finishing

preparing the mid-day dinner. I guess they became specially interested in this because the

Holding family had come from England where soccer was the main winter sport for men,

where in NZ it had always been rugby but soccer soon became quite popular also. New

Zealand became a very ‘sport-mad’ country and gained many international successes both in

team sports and individual events in World Games, Olympic Games, Commonwealth Games.

DAVID As the local family butcher David had got to know most people in the district very well, and further afield, as we had the only butcher’s shop between the University corner and

Port Chalmers. However, for a while David extended FREE deliveries to quite a wide area.

His sausages in particular were very popular and he made a wide variety of tastes in these,

even paua or peach on request. For a while he was the only butcher offering FREE delivery.

David was teaching Sunday School and Bible Class and a member of Church Session. (See

Volume I, Chapter II, Church). He eventually was also on the board of the Ravensbourne

School, The Christian Business Men’s Association (CBMA), Otago Church Book Shop, Head

of the West Harbour Civil Defence and a member and trumpeter for the local Masonic Lodge

from which he later withdrew when he realised they were not believing in Christian truths.

Early on Saturday mornings he met in Dunedin with the Dunedin Prayer Fellowship Group

and early on Sunday mornings he spent time at the manse in prayer and training in preaching

with The Rev Dr Ed Norton who was minister at the time for the West Harbour Parish.

FAMILY DEVOTIONS As dedicated Christians, David and I made a habit of having a family prayer and Bible reading at breakfast time and the children had Bible teaching at

Sunday School then Bible Class. We encouraged each of our children to take turns with the

reading and praying. David and I continued our breakfast prayer time throughout our lives.

We prayed that our children would continue walking the Christian life after they left home.

We loved our children very much and basically they were well behaved and I’m sure they had

a happy and fun-filled childhood. But, like all children they sometimes got up to mischief.

One example is the time one of ours and one who lived near, I think it was Geoffrey and

Frank, decided the rotary clothes line would make a great swinging round-about. While they

were having a heap of fun with this, suddenly their weight caused the centre pole to bend over

and we, as parents, were not at all pleased.

NEW HOME – BALMACEWEN ROAD In January 1972 we sold our first home and bought a house at 207 Balmacewen Road. Our three sons had been sharing a not-big-enough

bedroom and we had promised Geoffrey a room of his own at 12, but now he was 14. We had

thought we could have put in an inside stairway down to the basement and make part of that

into a fourth bedroom but couldn’t afford to do this. To get a loan for alterations at that time it

was necessary to first save half the required amount which we were never able to do. But it

seemed no trouble to get a larger amount to mortgage a home. We only needed about $2,000

to alter but were granted $8,500 towards buying a different home. We sold for $5,800 and

bought for $12,500 and of course there were fees to pay as well. It was hard to find somebody

who would buy a house on such a large sloping section but we did in the end and they

actually made the alterations we’d planned and put some balconies outside two rooms.


Four bedroom houses were hard to find so we bought this one with three bedrooms and a

cottage with two rooms where Robert and Bruce shared one as a bedroom. For several years I

taught music pupils in the other room and/or David used it as an office. At one stage Bruce

had a drum set in it where he practised for playing in a band and Robert practised his guitar.

We even put our big bench freezer in this room. There was a smaller flat section but enough

for a good sized vegetable garden and flowers. We put in a 13 x 9 ft polythene tunnel house at

the far end past the cottage and later a toolshed between the garage and back garden. As the

hedge round three sides was all the same it was easier and quicker to maintain with an

electric hedge cutter rather than hand shears. We had a great view of the hills of Flagstaff and

plenty of sun at the back making a lovely light, warm kitchen.

About the time of our Silver Wedding, 1981 we decided to enlarge our lounge. We often had

members of the Bible Class at our home and it seemed that it was when they were all spread

around the floor of the lounge that somebody would call out “Coffee anybody?” and there just

wasn’t room to move about or pass coffee around safely. We extended the lounge by about

2/3, altered the front porch, and changed front bedroom windows and lounge to brown

aluminium frames.

Later we remodelled and altered the back porch to let the sun in by taking out the wall in the

corner and the wooden door and replacing them with a wide ranchslider. This let so much

more light into the kitchen/dining room and kept it warmer.

The kitchen was now such a sunny room almost all day and since most of us were away from

home during the day we decided to get rid of the open fireplace inside the back wall. We then

knocked out the area and lined it to make a neat alcove for our fridge which had been

standing in the sun. We had a shared shrubbery between our drive and the leg-in to the

neighbour’s house at the back and gradually filled it with colourful shrubs.

68

District We were near the Wakari end of Balmacewen Road and driving the other way towards Maori Hill or on to the City the road went right through the Golf Links. There were

two Primary schools, one Intermediate and two Private High schools nearby, two churches,

tennis courts, lawn bowls, two medical centres, two shopping areas, a hospital and a power

station. We were about ‘on the snow line’ in the winter but enjoyed many sunny summer

months to enjoy the colours of bushes and flower.

We didn’t see a great deal of the folk from neighbouring houses as these days people tend to

jump in their cars in their garage or up their drive and off they go and we don’t walk around

the district enough to get into conversation. Because of the large hedge between us and our

neighbours we didn’t often talk over the fence when out in the garden or hanging clothes on

the line. But they were friendly and none of us gave any trouble to each other. There were not

many children in this area so it was hard for ours to make new friends in their age groups.

NEW HOME – 207 BALMACEWEN ROAD January 1972

No 207 is the long section showing garage, toolshed and red-roofed cottage in back area.


Colourful spring shrubs

Winter views between house and cottage – different years – different caravans

Doreen and Luke watering David’s veges. Tunnel house lettuce, tomatoes and spuds

NEW SCHOOLS, CHURCH AND BRIGADES

70

Geoffrey continued at Otago Boys till the end of Form 6 then started work. Sharon changed to

Balmacewen Intermediate then attended Otago Girls High School for F3 and half F4 when

she changed over to St Hilda’s Collegiate (where I was teaching) for another 2–1/2 years.

Robert started his two years at Balmacewen Intermediate then attended Otago Boys for four

years. Bruce transferred to Wakari School for his Std 3 and 4 years, a much bigger school

than Ravensbourne, then had his two years at Balmacewen Intermediate before his four years

at Otago Boys.

We joined up with the Maori Hill Presbyterian Church where our children attended Sunday

School. Sharon transferred from West Harbour Girls’ Brigade to the Wakari Company.

Geoffrey continued Boys’ Brigade at Dundas St and Robert and Bruce joined Boys’ Brigade

at Wakari.

ACCIDENT One Sunday afternoon in 1972, 27th May, the year we shifted, we decided to take a drive from Balmacewen Road to look at the section the West Harbour Parish had

bought to build a new Manse. We took the children first to have a look at a submarine which

was in our harbour. When we were almost at St Leonards, so had begun to slow down,

suddenly there was a car coming towards us travelling about 70 mph in a 30 mph area on the

wrong side of the road on a blind corner. That was a real shock and I only had time to shout

‘David’ when they hit us head on. Our lovely car was a write-off.

But we were all alive Praise God. It was fortunate that Geoffrey had stayed at home, so there

was nobody sitting in the middle front seat which had no seat belt. Even wearing seat belts

David and I were badly damaged with multiple injuries. There were no seat belts in the back

and Bruce received a large cut on his forehead. Sharon and Robert were badly shocked but

with no serious injuries. IF David and I had not buckled up our seat belts at Robert’s nagging

when we reached town, it would have been much worse. Thank you Robert.

We Praise God for saving our lives and that Tom Mutch (a friend from singing), was not far

behind that car and was quickly on the scene. He looked after Robert and Sharon while

David, Bruce and I and the four Korean seamen from the other car were taken to hospital in

three ambulances. Tom took Sharon and Robert to his place first, then for a check at the

hospital. Then he collected Mum and Dad from their house and drove them to be with

Geoffrey at our house in Balmacewen. We were grateful for this, for Mum and Dad and

friends who looked after the children in their homes for 2 or 3 weeks; also David’s sister Dot,


who came and stayed with us for a couple of weeks, cooked our meals and did our housework

when we were home from hospital.

We were not very mobile for several weeks. David’s worst injury was his jaw broken in three

places and wired up for eight weeks. That kept him quiet – it was hard for him to talk. He

lived on soft foods all those weeks. He also suffered permanent pain from the force taken by

his arms and legs. During this time I wore a figure-eight bandage to help set a broken left

collar bone. I also had a punctured right lung (we both had broken ribs) and permanent severe

muscle damage in my right thigh. It was over 2-1/2 years of X-rays, treatment and

examinations before we were discharged from checkups.

It was in the days when a lump sum was paid for ACC (Accident Compensation) and was

several years before we got any reasonable satisfaction of payment from the faulty party and

longer for Bruce for the scar above his eyebrow. Things were delayed because the Korean

seaman were in a hired car from a company which had since been sold to somebody else.

Neither company wanted to be held responsible. The Korean Embassy arranged for the

seamen to be quickly transported back to Korea. The only decent thing that happened was that

the Captain of the ship visited David, Bruce and I in hospital very distressed and apologetic

and gave us each a bunch of flowers.

A fading generation 1973-1988

A TRAGIC ACCIDENT On 20th July 1973 at about 4 pm we heard the dreadful news that my mother, Maggie Gilchrist, was knocked down by a car in Taieri Road, while crossing

over to Pennant Street. She and Dad had been in town and Mum decided to get off the bus in

Roslyn to visit Aunty Win who had not been well. Dad continued home and Mum caught a

later bus. It was nobody’s fault but a set of circumstances. Mum said she saw the cars and

stopped in the centre of the road but the sun is very low in the sky in the winter afternoons

and can be quite dangerous with the glare almost blinding for the motorist. This is what

happened and it was upsetting for that young man driving the car which hit mum. His mother

taught at St Hilda’s where I was teaching and was naturally very upset for me and us all.

It was a very traumatic time for us and for Dad but nobody, even doctors, had anticipated that

Mum would not survive although it was thought there was severe internal bleeding. Sadly,

she died the next night before Margaret was able to get here from Christchurch and no family

had been able to see or talk to her except Dad and I and one aunt. This was a real tragedy and

shock to us all and it seemed at times when people were coming to comfort us that to me

anyway, I was walking in a bad dream. David was a huge support to me and all of us. Mum

was 79 and in good health, the second Bartlett sister to die. Aunty Cis had died just one year

before, aged 83 yrs.

It was a double tragedy that weekend. The teenage girl who lived across the road from us in

Ravensbourne, Glenda Lister, died instantly when she was thrown off the back of her

boyfriend’s motorbike and David was asked by her father Ron, to come down and talk with

them. This was a really hard thing for him to do right then. The funerals were at the same time

but I don’t think either family would have been able to cope with going to both.

72

DAD’S LAST YEARS We were all in grief and naturally Dad was very lonely. His neice/adopted sister Irene came to housekeep for him but during the next 15 months he

became close to a widow, Gracie McPherson, at the Bowling Club, who brought him comfort

and support as they walked home from bowls in the same direction. They married 18 months

after Mum’s death. Soon after that he had a stroke but worked at recovering from that. But the

grief was there underneath and he died in his sleep another 18 months later, just over three

years after Mum, 28 July 1976, four days before he would have turned 80.

Through these years things changed for me when there were special or important things to

talk over with a family member and interesting things to share about our family. At first I

would pop in to talk with Mum and Dad, then when they had both died I’d pop in to or ring

Aunty Lena, then one of the other aunts. Then came the time when none of them were here

any more and then WE were the older generation. That was quite strange and there was a

loneliness.

During the next 14 years all our aunts and uncles except two died between the ages of 71 and

88, also Margaret’s husband Ron in 1988 at age 72. Alan and Shirley’s youngest son Garry,

aged 24, died in a fire in the flat he was staying in. Another tragedy, especially for one so

young, and for his parents. Alan was living in the North Island at that time. Dad’s youngest

sister Mary (Molly) and mum’s sister-in-law Ella both survived till they were almost 97.

Aunty Ella died in the year 2003. I was pleased that when I was staying with Sharon in

Palmerston North in 2002 we were able to drive to Masterton to visit her and my cousin Fred

and his wife Nola. I had not seen them since about 1975 when Aunty Ella left Dunedin

David’s parents had died much earlier, his father in 1961 at age 71 and his mother in 1963 at

age 72. Jean died from Angina in 1981 age 61, Muriel from Luekemia three years later age 67

and her husband Jack in 1983 age 68. Ken Holding’s wife Peggy lived till 2004 to age 77. By

mid 2006 Dot (Dorothy) was 83 and her husband Walter Harrison and brother Ken were 85.

Margaret turned 80 in 2005 and in 2006 Alan would turn 70 and Ian 75.

MY MUSIC During the first years of our marriage I became involved with new music activities. When we shifted to Ravensbourne had I started a few piano pupils and a new

children’s choir but found this difficult to fit in once we had two children who needed their


mother’s attention each day. I also gave piano and recorder lessons to each of our children

then recorder classes after school. (see Volume I, Chapter IV, Music)When we shifted to

Balmacewen Road in 1972 I again started a few new piano and recorder pupils, later

including some of our grandchildren. But that year most of my teaching changed to typing

classes at St Hilda’s Collegiate (see Volume I, Chapter VI, Employment).

A few years later I joined the ‘Y’ Choristers and later I sometimes filled in with conducting or

accompanying there. I still remained a member of The Society of Women Musicians and gave

piano or vocal solos at times. At different times I was also involved with the Dunedin Musical

Society. (See Volume I, Chapter IV, Music).

While living in Ravensbourne and later at Balmacewen Road, at times there were fund-raising

events for church and school and these brought opportunities for me. I had sometimes sung or

played accompaniments or solos in other groups with the Older Citizens’ Clubs, Hard of

Hearing and Blind Foundation groups, and Ross Home. Then I started to make up concert

parties often using some of the best musicians I knew in Dunedin.

I would visit or telephone each musician early in the year to tell them the school or church

was planning a fundraiding concert later in that year and I would invite them to provide an

item. The answer was always a willing ‘yes’ and request for the date and that I would contact

them a few months later with details and then a reminder nearer the concert date. There was

never any mention of a fee to be paid to them. For each person or group that I invited I would

give the number of minutes we would like for their item(s) and in plenty of time I would ask

them for the titles of the items and exact number of minutes for the total of their selection.

This way I could advertise the exact time the concert would finish and it almost always was

right. This was important where parents needed to take children home. I used the top singers,

pianists, violinists Joan Gardener and Alan McDermott, piano accordianist Bill Thomas (Dn,

NZ’s No. 1) and xylophone player Walter Sinton (Dn, NZ’s No. 1), singing groups and dance

troupes. These groups’ families and friends helped swelled the audiences.

In 1970 when the Kaikorai Presbyterian Church celebrated their Centennial they invited me to

prepare and lead a senior choir for the event which I happily did. Names got a bit mixed on

the program because Jean Holden prepared a junior choir and we were each listed in two

places but in one place we were listed as Doreen Holden and Jean Holding. We were still

living in Ravensbourne at that time. Another time I was invited to prepare and lead the Half

Way Bush Country Women’s Institute choir for the annual CWI choir competition. At the

time I was still leading the senior and junior choirs at Ravensbourne church. A busy time.

From about 1971 till September 1974, encouraged by David, I became one of the Music

Critics who wrote Reviews for The Evening Star Newspaper. For this I received two free

tickets in the centre front row of the balcony and a very small monetary fee. This meant I was

able to attend and enjoy some concerts that I would normally consider too expensive for me.

It also meant that in the dark halls I would scribble on my program brief notes from which to

sit up late at night and prepare the Review to be read over the phone or delivered to the

counter by 8.30 am next day.

This was a bit tricky but somehow I managed to type up suitable thoughts on paper which The

Evening Star and their readers accepted. Among the concert performers were: World

74

famousYehudi Menuhin (top world violinist), Harry Secombe, Evan Rebroff (tenors),

Scottish Tenor Kenneth McKellar, Vladimir Ashkenazy (pianist), The Kingsingers, Karl Pini

String Quartette, World Famous Singer Vera Lynn, darling of the troupes during World War

II (that was my biggest thrill), The Russian Ballet.

From our own country, NZ National Symphony Orchestra, NZ Brass Bands, Dunedin Schola

Cantorum singing Handel’s Messiah, Haydn’s Creation, Brahm’s Requiem, Mendelssohn’s

Elijah, University of Otago Music performers, NZ pianists Maurice Till (Dn), Janetta McStay,

Michael Houston, Christopher Norton (Dn), Richard Mapp, NZ singers Honor McKeller

(Dn), John Rowles. Also our wonderful local Symphony Orchestra later known as the

Southern Sinfonia. I reviewed at least 32 concerts over about four years. Then it was time to

stop and hand over to another.

GEOFFREY’s first job after Form 6 was for a year with an insurance company before starting training to be a butcher in our shop. He was also the Follow-up Director for Youth

For Christ Rallys. When we sold our shop Geoffrey was not needed there. He found a

position as a supervisor of a Youth For Christ Works Skills venture, growing and preparing

tomatoes for the market. This was interesting because Geoffrey never liked eating tomatoes.

SHARON finished four years at High School then worked as a typist/receptionist at Butterfield’s furniture/clothing/household store in The Octagon where she met her future

husband. She really wanted to be a kindergarten teacher and later you will read that she

became involved with day care and pre-school work.

ROBERT finished Form 6 at the end of 1977 then worked for 6 months in Christchurch then 6 months in Invercargill, as a Technical Trainee for the NZ Electricity Department. Then

he attended Otago University for a few months before starting work in the shop of Smith Saw

& Mowers in South Dunedin .

BRUCE finished Form 6 then worked for the National Bank for a few years later changing to become a type retreader for large truck tyres, working for Bandag and progressed to

foreman there.

As they were each involved with sports teams this meant David and I took turns driving them

to and from their sports grounds until we bought a little Morris Minor for me to use and when

each of our children were old enough to get their driving licence we sometimes allowed them

to use this car to drive themselves to their sports events.

During the next few years, once our three sons started work they saved up and each bought a

car of their own. This was a big help for David and I but at one stage it meant the family as a

whole owned four cars and a butcher’s van so that at times there was a need for one to shift

their car from the drive to the street to allow another to drive theirs out. Then at one stage

Geoffrey bought a motor scooter and Robert bought a motorbike. Sharon sometimes used her

bicycle to ride to and from sports. It was, and is still, quite common for families to own

several motorcars or vans so that visitors often had trouble finding a parking space.


September 1977, Geoffrey turns 20 yrs old

CHILDREN LEAVING HOME – FLATTING AND MARRIAGES Some time after Sharon’s 20

th birthday celebration in 1979, she became engaged to Philip

Gilchrist (not a relative of my family) and Geoffrey became engaged to Jennifer (Jenny)

Wilson. Wilson was my grandmother’s name (my Mum’s Mum).

Geoffrey and Jenny married in February 1980, at Knox Presbyterian Church . They bought a home in Manapouri Street up the hill in Ravensbourne. Robert and Bruce were

groomsmen and Sharon and Jenny’s sister Wendy, were bridesmaids.

Proud parents, David and Doreen on the day of the first of our children’s marriages.

Groom Geoffrey with parents Father and three sons Geoffrey & Jenny

76

For Geoffrey and Jenny’s wedding their brothers and sisters were the wedding party.

Geoffrey’s brothers Robert and Bruce were Groomsmen and our three sons looked very

handsome wearing dark brown suits. Geoffrey’s sister Sharon and Jenny’s sister Wendy

looked very attractive in their pale pink floral Bridesmaids’ frocks and white, wide brimmed

picture hats

Sharon made her bridesmaid’s frock

Jenny looked lovely in her wedding gown which she mostly sewed herself.

Jenny also made matching waistcoats for her younger brothers Donald and Philip.

Expecting a hot, sunny February day, which it was, David had bought himself a lovely mid

blue summer weight suit and looked, of course, very handsome and proud. I bought a short

length butter/yellow frock of jersey silk and I was very proud that day also. This was the first

wedding in our family. A very special day.

The wedding and reception were held at Knox Presbyterian Church and the minister was Rev

Ian McMillan.

Sharon and Philip were married at Kaikorai Presbyterian Church by Rev Brian Williscroft.

and it was also a lovely sunny day, 5th

April, 1980.

Again David looked very smart in his blue suit and I wore a long deep green satin frock with

lace bodice and ¾ length sleeves.

I have mentioned on the photo page what a beautiful bride our daughter was in my wedding

gown which I had made for my own wedding nearly 24 years earlier. Sharon and I altered

the style of the neck to match her bridesmaids’ frocks and replaced my narrow sleeves with

wide lace sleeves. She altered my veil to wear with her own choice of headpiece.

Philip’s sister Karen was bridesmaid and sisters Zaklina and Desiree Cvjetan were junior

bridesmaids. Sharon had known these girls since they were babies and when she baby-sat for

them had promised that when she married they could be flower girls or bridesmaids.

Their frocks were mid pink and the two younger girls each carried a basket of flowers in place

of bouquets. The men looked smart wearing light grey suits.

They held their reception at Glenfalloch on the side of the harbour on the Otago Peninsula,

almost opposite Ravensbourne where we first lived. Glenfalloch is a lovely bush gardens with

several reception rooms.


The big day has come

The first wedding for the Holding family

Bride and Groom Jennifer and Geoffrey Holding with sisters and brothers

Sharon Holding, Wendy Wilson, Bruce Holding, Robert Holding

In the grounds of Knox Church, Dunedin

Sharon and Phil married in April the same year at Kaikorai Presbyterian Church They bought my parents’ house in Beresford Street, Kaikorai.

A happy day, the bride wearing her mother’s wedding gown and veil slightly altered.

Proud parents, David and Doreen, with Bride and Groom, Sharon and Philip

78

The bride arrives with proud father Groom Philip, Bride Sharon

Sharon and David Desiree, Zaklina, Karen (Phil’s sister)

Around that time Robert and Bruce each went flatting with some friends and soon after David

sold the shop and became the Otago/Southland Rep for the Bible Society in NZ. Life was

changed quite a lot for the Holding family. The house often seemed ‘so empty’.

DAVID Because David used to sing hymns often while working in the shop he became known as ‘The Halleluia Butcher”. At one time he had a display stand with Christian Living

Books for sale.

After about twenty years as owner/manager of our shop ‘Holding’s Quality Butchers’ on the

Main Road, Ravensboure, David sold the shop and on 1st April 1981 at 52 years of age he

became the Otago/Southland Regional Representative for the Bible Society in NZ. During the

next 7-8 years he became more widely known and loved as he was responsible for promoting

The Bible through preaching and meetings in churches and schools of every Christian

denomination in the area from the Waitaki River bridge to Stewart Island, East coast to West

coast. It took about two years to get round them all. He loved this job but did not consider it

‘work’. He just loved God and wanted people to know Him and love Him and be able to read

and know His Word. To this end he encouraged people to give generously so that The Bible

could be translated into more and more languages to be printed and distributed worldwide.


It was in November 1981 when David and I celebrated our 25th

Wedding Anniversary that we

decided to extend our lounge and have aluminium window frames into the lounge, also ours

and the front bedroom. The family sprung a

surprise on us on the Saturday while David and I

were papering the lounge. I was papering and he

was doing the trimming top and bottom then

painting the skirting. One of our family rang and

said he and his girlfriend were coming up our

way and ‘would they bring some fish ‘n chips for

lunch?’ We said that sounded a great idea. Then I

think it was Sharon rang and said she and Phil

were coming round so we said to let their brother

know to get extra for lunch. Well, in the end they

all came and we sat around on the lounge floor to eat because all the furniture was in other

rooms while we were papering. Actually, it wasn’t fish ‘n chips at all, it was a selection of

home made salads and meat prepared by each family member.

GRANDCHILDREN Meantime we had become grandparents.

GEOFFREY AND JENNY had three daughters, Sarah Ruth April 1981, Rachel Ann April 1983 and Naomi Elizabeth Sept 1984. It was about three months after Naomi was born

that this family sold their home in Ravensbourne and shifted to The Bible College of NZ

Auckland in 1985 for four years where Geoffrey gained a Bathelor of Theology and Three

Year “Diploma of the College” with merit at Degree level. He was also involved in his 3rd

and

4th

year with some ministry at the church in Henderson with Rev Robert Smith who we had

known earlier before he married Alison Troughton when her father Hessel was our minister in

West Harbour. Robert had been Geoffrey’s Sunday School Teacher there. We missed seeing

the girls growing up but managed two trips up there and they had one trip down, during that

time. David and I did a trip to visit them and attend Geoffrey’s graduation at Bible College at

the end of 1988.

Rachel, Naomi, Sarah Rachel, Naomi, Sarah

80

SHARON AND PHIL had three children also, Brendon Craig Feb 1982, Stephanie Louise May 1984 and Luke Tyler Nov 1988. Phil was a fully qualified engine driver for NZ Railways

working shift work driving trains. When the children were all at school Sharon became a

child carer in their home and was well respected and sort after. David and I really loved being

grandparents; we enjoyed time with our grandchildren and watching them grow from babies

to young children. They were very special.

Sharon with Sharon, Phil and children Brendon, Stephanie, Luke

David & Doreen, Luke, Brendon, Stephanie Doreen with Sarah, Rachel and Naomi

Back: David, Brendon, Luke , Doreen

Front: Sarah, Naomi, Stephanie, Rachel


When Geoffrey’s family shifted back to Dunedin at the end of 1988 to live in Wakari the two

families’ children went to the same schools, Wakari then Balmacewen Intermediate. Geoffrey

assisted in ministry at the Kaikorai Church for a year before continuing theological study at

Knox College in North Dunedin and graduated with a Postgraduate Diploma in Biblical

Studies and Diploma in Ministry then completed a Masters Thesis on “Hell in Matthew’s

Gospel” in 1990.

ROBERT had shifted to Sydney, Australia near the end of 1984 for 14 months, working for a mower firm where he was put in charge of a new branch. He made a short trip home for

Bruce’s wedding in March 1986 then returned to Dunedin for Christmas 1986. In 1987 he

became a Radio Announcer for Radio Otago working in Dunedin, Cromwell, Invercargill

then Dunedin again.

BRUCE’S WEDDING In March 1986 Bruce married Elizabeth (Liz) Munro in the Half Way Bush Presbyterian Church. Liz worked as a computer programmer for the National

Insurance Co. Bruce first worked for the National Bank, then became a tyre retreader for large

truck tyres, for Bandag and progressed to foreman there. He worked at this energetic job also

in Auckland where they shifted to when Liz’s firm moved their head office there. Later Bruce

decided it was time to make a change and took a part time job while he attended a Polytech

Course in Computing. Computers had been around for some time and most businesses needed

workers who were computer literate.

The morning of Bruce’s wedding David, Bruce, Doreen

Three brothers, Robert, Bruce, Geoffrey

Bruce and Liz with groomsmen and bridesmaids

82

All the family at Bruce and Liz’s wedding

MY 60TH

BIRTHDAY in November 1987 David and I planned to go out, just the two of us, for a special meal at a Chinese restaurant in South Dunedin and while we were getting

ready Robert was sitting in the sun on the steps to the cottage, reading a book. This was a bit

unusual – he didn’t usually sit there - but we didn’t think too much about it. When we left he

said ‘enjoy your meal’ and off we went. David stopped for a few minutes down the road to

check he had his wallet and cheque book in his pocket. This was a delay tactic but I wasn’t

aware that it was. When we walked into the restaurant – there were all our family except

Geoffrey and family who were in Auckland. I gaped and said ‘how did you all get here before

us?’ But they told us Robert had his good clothes under old ones when he was sitting on those

steps and as soon as we drove away he rang Bruce who rang Sharon to say ‘let’s go!’ It was

all pre-planned of course as a surprise for me.

DAVID’S RETIREMENT When David retired from his position with The Bible Society at age 60 in October 1988 he was ‘snapped up’ as an full time assistant Lay Preacher at the

North Invercargill Presbyterian Church, assisting the Rev Glen Ashton. This was for a total of

about five months and when I retired from teaching at St Hilda’s at age 61 I joined him living

in Invercargill till we did our nine week overseas trip April-June 1989. (more of that later)

While in Invercargill we were given the free use of a house belonging to one of the ladies

from the North Invercargill Pres. Parish while she and her sister lived in her holiday home in

Queenstown. This house was on the busy thoroughfare Ellis Road which ran alongside a park.

Right opposite the house was one of Invercargill’s two heated swimming pools so each

morning at 6.30 am I went across the road in this lady’s white towelling housecoat for my half

hour training swim then back across the road to shower and dress while David prepared

breakfast before going to the church office. When David finished his time at this church we

went home to Dunedin to prepare for our big overseas trip (see Chapter VIII – Holidays).

When we returned from our big trip David was appointed part time Ordained Lay Preacher

for the Saddle Hill Presbyterian Parish which had services at Fairfield then Ocean View one

week and Fairfield then Brighton on alternate weeks. Once a month we then went to the home

of Isobel and Colin Harrex for dinner then David took a small afternoon service at Taieri

Mouth. David was much loved by all the people in this Parish and we both made many new

friends there.


Sometimes I went with David to these church services and meetings but I remained a member

of the Maori Hill Presb church where I enjoyed singing in the choir in church services and

Christmas Cantatas, being part of the music group, and attending a weekly Bible Study Group

taken first by Eleanor Gray then by Celia Paulin. Numbers attending varied up to 16. I also

enjoyed a special group which met each second Wednesday morning at Gray’s home, led by

June Howie and Eleanor. This was a varied group of 16-18 ladies, not all Presbyterian, where

we were led in Worship, and taught in Bible Study and Prayer Ministry. The Lord’s

annointing was present and much healing, physical and emotional, was felt.

MORE HOUSE ALTERATIONS Sometime after we had bought a Television set for the lounge and spent more time in there in the later

afternoons and evenings it didn’t seem necessary

to still have a fire in the kitchen. Most of the

family were away all day and many frosty wintry

nights were followed by lovely days when the sun

streamed into our kitchen. We had been carrying

hot embers into the lounge to start that fire then

bringing back the embers at bedtime to keep the

kitchen fire banked overnight for a warm breakfast

time. First we changed to using a heater in the

kitchen. Then we decided to knock out the

fireplace and we made it into a neat alcove to shift our refrigerator into. Strangely, Dot and

Walter were doing exactly the same in a new house they’d recently shifted into in Invercargill.

This worked out to be very satisfactory.

At some stage we replaced the kitchen bench and some

of the cupboards, than later replaced the remaining

cupboards and put in an island cupboard bench

opposite the back door to make

a break between the kitchen and

dining areas. When Sharon

moved out we made her

bedroom into the dining room

to leave extra space in the

kitchen area.

Then, because the back door was wooden we decided to replace it

with a glass one to let in the late afternoon sun. It seemed a waste to

shut it out. We had the area of roughcast wall from the door to the

porch corner knocked out and had a wide ranchslider put it. This made

such a difference letting sun in almost all day and keeping our house

warmer.

In 1991 we decided to continue replacing wooden window frames and it was the turn for the

kitchen. This was done in May of that year in the week after we’d been to Wanaka for our two

weeks at the Pines Resort Timeshare. This proved to be a very involved and unusual week

But more of that in the end of Chapter VIII and start of Chapter IX.

CHAPTER VII - MARRIAGE AND FAMILYDoreen Gilchrist and David Holding – happy engaged couple

District We were near the Wakari end of Balmacewen Road and driving the other way towards Maori Hill or on to the City the road went right through the Golf Links. There were two Primary schools, one Intermediate and two Private High schools nearby, t...We didn’t see a great deal of the folk from neighbouring houses as these days people tend to jump in their cars in their garage or up their drive and off they go and we don’t walk around the district enough to get into conversation. Because of the lar...New Schools, Church and BrigadesA fading generation 1973-1988BRUCE finished Form 6 then worked for the National Bank for a few years later changing to become a type retreader for large truck tyres, working for Bandag and progressed to foreman there.children leaving home – flatting and marriages

For Geoffrey and Jenny’s wedding their brothers and sisters were the wedding party.Sharon made her bridesmaid’s frockJenny looked lovely in her wedding gown which she mostly sewed herself.Jenny also made matching waistcoats for her younger brothers Donald and Philip.Grandchildren Meantime we had become grandparents.

Documents

CHAPTER VII - MARRIAGE AND FAMILY › wzukusers › user-19310781 › documents...He got the ‘piano’ bit right, one out of three. OUR MARRIAGE - 24th November that year, 1956