BODY LANGUAGE & VOICE MODULATION

Enhancing Non-Verbal Communication!

Who Am I?

Tell us about yourself in fifteen words.

Example: I am Shahnaz Patel, a soft skills trainer who loves dancing and reading books.

A blind boy sat on the steps of a building with a hat by his feet. He held up a sign which said: "I am blind, please help." There were only a few coins in the hat.  

A man was walking by. He took a few coins from his pocket and dropped them into the hat. He then took the sign, turned it around, and wrote some words. He put the sign back so that everyone who walked by would see the new words.

I am blind, please help

Soon the hat began to fill up. A lot more people were giving money to the blind boy. That afternoon the man who had changed the sign came to see how things were. The boy recognized his footsteps and asked, "Were you the one who changed my sign this morning? What did you write?"

The man said, "I only wrote the truth. I said what you said but in a different way."

What he had written was: "Today is a beautiful day and I cannot see it."

Do you think the first sign and the second sign were saying the same thing?

Today is a beautiful day and I cannot

see it."

Communication skills- Definition

Communication is referred to as the exchange of information, knowledge or thoughts between individuals and groups.

It can be a one-way or a two-way process.

The Communication Cycle

Types of Communication

Verbal

Non-verbal

Verbal

Oral

Written

Oral Communication

Oral - Involves aspects of Voice:

Tone

Inflection

Pitch

Intonation

Rate of Speech

Volume

Tone

It is the expression of emotions and feelings in your voice.

Tone of voice is most basically defined as the quality of a person's voice. These qualities are made of the pitch, characteristics and volume of the voice.

The way the words are delivered and the manner are speaking also make up the tone.

Inflection

In grammar, inflection is the modification of a word to express different grammatical categories such as tense, grammatical mood, grammatical voice, aspect, person, number, gender and case.

It is also the alteration of pitch or tone of voice.

Pitch

The quality of a sound governed by the rate of vibrations producing it; the degree of highness or lowness of a tone.

Intonation

Intonation is the relative emphasis that may be given to certain syllables in a word, or to certain words in a phrase or sentence.

Say It!

Placement of the emphasis Why don’t I take you to

dinner tonight? Why don’t I take you to

dinner tonight? Why don’t I take you to

dinner tonight? Why don’t I take you to

dinner tonight? Why don’t I take you to

dinner tonight? Why don’t I take you to

dinner tonight? Why don’t I take you to

dinner tonight?

What it means I was going to take someone

else. Instead of the guy you were

going with. I’m trying to find a reason

why I shouldn’t take you. Instead of going on your own.

Do you have a problem with me?

Instead of lunch tomorrow.

Not tomorrow night.

Repeat the following sentence intonating each word:Why don’t I take you to dinner tonight?

Rate of Speech

It is the rate at which you speak.

Read This!

As a representative of your organization, it is important that you speak clearly. That means that you must articulate. It also means that you must speak so that you can be understood. Although there is no set rate of speech, most expert speakers talk at between one-hundred-forty and one-hundred-sixty words per minute. That is a good speed for verbal communication. It is not too fast to be understood. It does not give the listener the impression that you are under pressure nor is it too slow. The one-hundred-sixty word rate adds an element of dignity to your voice. The one-hundred-sixty word rates also gives a sound image to your audience that establishes both you and your company as efficient and well-organized. To give the audience the kind of impression of yourself and your company that you wish, speak correctly, speak at one-hundred-sixty -- that's one-hundred sixty words per minute.

Written Communication

Email

Reports

Letters

Non-verbal

Gestures

Facial Expressions

Eye Contact

Body Movement & Posture

Proximity/Personal Space

What is Body Language?

Body language is the unspoken or non-verbal mode of communication that we do in every single aspect of our interaction with another person. It is like a mirror that tells us what the other person thinks and feels in response to our words or actions. Body language involves gestures, mannerisms, and other bodily signs.

Body Language may be conscious or involuntary.

History of Body Language

Dates back to the 1960s

Julius Fast published a book about body language in 1970 , one of the first books to talk about the non-verbal cues and their impact.

Technical study on the subject dates back to Charles Darwin, 1872.

Charlie Chaplin- Silent Movies

Silent actors like Charlie Chaplin were the pioneers of non-verbal communication skills.

They were the only means of communication available on the screen.

Each actor was classed as good or bad by the extent to which he could use gestures and other body signals to communicate effectively.

Impact of a Message- Albert Mehrabian

7%

38%55%

Impact of a Message

VerbalVocalNon-Verbal

Gestures-Across Cultures!

is 'good' to Westerners, 'one' to Italians,'five' to Japanese and 'up *****' to the Greeks

Gestures

A gesture is a body movement used to express an idea or an emotion.

Some universal gestures are: Smiling Nodding Sneering

Sneering Example

Human and animal sneering — you wouldn't want to go on a date with either of these two

Negative Gestures

There are some negative gestures which should be avoided: Pointing at people- It is perceived as accusatory. Fiddling with your items-It gives the impression that

you are nervous. Head Down- It suggests timidity. Drooping shoulders- It implies weariness and

lethargy. Shifty eyes- It suggests nervousness. Arms crossed on the chest- It is a defensive gesture. Shaking feet or legs- It shows indifference and

disinterest.

Avoid these hand gestures

Use these hand gestures

Which smile is fake?

False smiles pull back only the mouth, real smiles pull back both the mouth

and eyes

Types of Smiles

1. The tight-lipped smileThe lips are stretched tight across the face to form a straight line and the teeth are concealed. It sends the message that the smiler has a secret or a withheld opinion or attitude that they will not be sharing with you.

Types of Smiles

2. The Twisted SmileThis smile shows opposite emotions on each side of the face.In picture A below, the right brain raises the left side eyebrow, the left cheek to produce one type of smile on the left side of the face while the left brain pulls the same muscles downwards on the right side to produce an angry frown.

Types of Smiles

3. The Drop-Jaw SmileThis is a practised smile where the lower jaw is simply dropped down to give the impression that the person is laughing or playful.

Types of Smiles

4. Sideways-Looking-Up SmileWith the head turned down and away while looking up with a Tight-Lipped Smile, the smiler looks juvenile, playful and secretive. This coy smile has been shown to be men's favourite everywhere, because when a woman does it, it engenders parental male feelings, making men want to protect and care for females. This is one of the smiles Princess Diana used to captivate the hearts of people everywhere.

Facial Expressions

There are six categories of facial expressions:• Happiness• Sadness• Anger• Disgust• Surprise• Fear

Eye Contact

Our eyes are a very significant aspect of the non-verbal signals we send to others.

To a lesser or greater extent we all 'read' people's eyes without knowing how or why, and this ability seems to be inborn.

Eye Contact

Eye contact Encouraged in America, Canada,

Europe Rude in most Asian countries and in

Africa Raising eyebrows

“Yes” in Thailand and some Asian countries

“Hello” in the Philippines Winking eye

Sharing secret in America and Europe flirtatious gesture in other countries

Eye Contact

Closed eyes bored or sleepy in America “I’m listening and concentrating.” in Japan,

Thailand, China

Ears

Ear grasp “I’m sorry.” in parts of India

Cupping the ear “I can’t hear you.” in all societies

Nose

Holding the nose “Something smells bad.” universal

Nose tap “It’s confidential.” England “Watch out!” or "Be careful.” Italy

Nose

Pointing to nose “It’s me.” Japan

Blowing nose In most Asian countries, blowing the

nose at social gathering is ‘disgusting.’

Arms

Some cultures, like the Italians, use the arms freely. Others, like the Japanese, are more reserved; it is considered impolite to gesticulate with broad movements of the arms.

Folding arms are interpreted by some social observers as a form of excluding self, “I am taking a defensive posture,” or “I disagree with what I am hearing.”

Arms

Arms behind back, hands grasped is a sign of ease and control.

Arms in front, hands grasped, common practice in most Asian countries, is a sign of mutual respect for others.

Hands

Of all the body parts, the hands are probably used most for communicating non-verbally.

Hand waves are used for greetings, beckoning, or farewells.

Hands

The Italian “good-bye” wave can be interpreted by Americans as the gesture of “come here.”

The American “good-bye” wave can be interpreted in many parts of Europe and Latin America as the signal for “no.”

Hands

Beckoning The American way of getting attention

(raising a hand with the index finger raised above head) could be considered rude in Japan, and also means “two” in Germany.

In China, to beckon a waiter to refill your tea, simply turn your empty cup upside down.

Hands

Right hand- The right hand has special significance in many societies. In certain countries in the Middle East and in Asia, it is best to present business cards or gifts, or to pass dishes of food, to get an attention, using only the right hand or both.

Left hand is considered unclean in much of the Middle East and in parts of Indonesia.

Fingers

The “O.K.” signal. (the thumb and forefinger form a circle) means “fine,” or “O.K.” in most cultures, “zero” or “worthless” in some parts of

Europe “money” in Japan an insult in Greece, Brazil, Italy, Turkey,

Russia and some other countries

Fingers

“Thumb-up” means: “O.K.” “good job” or “fine” in most cultures, “Up *****!” in Australia “Five” in Japan; “One” in Germany

Avoid a thumb-up in these countries: Australia, New Zealand, Greece, Turkey, Iran, Russia, and most African countries.

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Fingers

Pointing Pointing with the index

finger is common in North America and Europe.

But it is considered impolite in Japan and China where they favor using the whole open hand.

Malaysians prefer pointing with the thumb.

Legs and Feet

In Asia, do not point with your toes.

In Asia and some European countries, putting feet up on a desk or any other piece of furniture is very disrespectful.

Sitting cross-legged, while common in North America and some European countries, is very impolite in other parts of the world.

In the Middle East and most parts of Asia, resting the ankle over the other knee risks pointing the sole of your shoe at another person, which is considered a rude gesture.

Walking

Walking can reflect many characteristics of a culture. For example: In parts of Asia and some of the Middle

Eastern countries, men who are friends may walk holding each other’s hand.

In Japan and Korea, older women commonly walk a pace or two behind male companion.

Asians often regard Western women as bold and aggressive, for they walk with a longer gait and a more upright posture.

Posture

Body posture can be open or closed.

Interested people pay attention and lean forward.

Leaning backwards demonstrates aloofness or rejection.

A head held straight up signals a neutral attitude.

A head down is negative and judgmental.

Posture

Some negative postures should be avoided:

Rigid Body Posture-Anxious/ Uptight

Hunched Shoulders –Lacks interest/ Feeling inferior

Crossed Arms-Protecting the body/ Negative Thoughts

What impression do the following people give you?

What impression do the following people give you?

Proximity/Personal Space

Proximity refers to the interpersonal distance between two or more people.

It is the region surrounding the individual in which he is comfortable.

Any intrusion in this space makes the individual uncomfortable.

Proximity/Personal Space

Imagine you have an invisible bubble surrounding you.

This bubble contracts and expands depending on the relationship we share with other people and the situation we are in.

Your personal space is different isn’t the same as mine!.

Proximity/Personal Space

When you interact with a stranger the bubble is becomes larger.

The better you know the person you're communicating with, the smaller the bubble becomes.

Research suggests that the bubble is usually larger for two men than for two women.

The bubble size may differ for different cultures.

Proximity/Personal Space

According to Edward T. Hall’s research there are four bodily distances:

Intimate Space(0-18 inches)Personal Space (1.5 feet-4 feet)

Social Space (4 feet-12 feet)

Public Space (12 feet and beyond)

Intimate Space(0-18 inches)

Of all the zone distances, this is by far the most important, as it is this zone that a person guards as if it were his own property. Only those who are emotionally close to us are permitted to enter.

These include lovers, parents, spouse, children close friends, relatives and pets.

Personal Space (1.5 feet-4 feet)

This is the distance that we stand from others at cocktail parties, office parties, social functions and friendly gatherings.

Social Space (4 feet-12 feet)

We stand at this distance from strangers, the plumber or carpenter doing repairs around our home, the postman, the local shopkeeper, the new employee at work and people whom we don't know very well.

People from asparsely populatedarea keeping theirdistance

Public Space (12 feet and beyond)

Whenever we address a large group of people, this is the comfortable distance at which we choose to stand.

Body language at an Interview

Who are you?

Based on your body language, an interviewer may know whether you are confident or not.

They can tell if you are capable of handling the job, if you are devoted, or if you’re someone who can get along with other employees.

Based on their questions, the interviewer will not only pay attention to what you say, but also on how you say it. The interviewer generally will find responses from you that match their qualifications.

The First Encounter

When the interviewer comes to the room to meet you, do not offer your hand for a handshake unless the interviewer offers his hand. Shake hands firmly, but do not squeeze. Maintain eye contact.

Proper Posture

Body posture is important during job interviews and you can adopt the following stance. At the beginning of the interview, sit up straight in your chair, with your back leaning against the back of the chair.

Do not slouch or move sideways in your chair because it might be perceived by the interviewer as a lack of interest or boredom.

On the other hand, sitting on the edge of your chair can impart a message that you are a little nervous and that you feel uneasy with the situation.

When the interviewer says something, it is advisable to lean forward a little. This shows interest and attention in what the interviewer is saying. You can tilt your head a little to show that you are listening closely.

Proper Gestures

Do not cross your arms because this might be perceived as a defensive move. Just place your hands loosely on your lap or just put them on the armrest of your chair.

While speaking, you may nod your head occasionally to expound on a subject or to give more meaning to what you are saying. Hand movements can also help to spice up the conversation. The interviewer would think that you are comfortable with the interview process if you make hand gestures.

Proper Gestures

Be aware of your interviewer’s hand movements as well. If they use their hands a lot to make a point or to clarify something, you can do the same thing as well.

Be alert to unintentional gestures that you may make sometimes due to tension. Some of the acts that may irritate the interviewer could include:

Tapping your fingers across the desk. Shuffling your feet. Biting your nails. Toying with a pen.

Body language peculiar to each style

Styles of Communication

Aggressive People

Body language Stiff and straight Points, bangs tables to emphasize points Folds arms across body

Verbal language “I want you to…” “You must…” “Do what I tell you!” “You’re stupid!”

Submissive people

Body Language Avoids eye contact Stooped posture Speaks quietly Fidgets

Verbal Language “I’m sorry” “It’s all my fault” “Oh dear”

Assertive People

Body language Stands straight Appears composed Smiles Maintains eye contact

Verbal language “Let’s” “How shall we do this?” “I think… What do you think?” “I would like…”

Being Effective with Body Language!

Reading Body Language

Read gestures in clusters

Look for congruence

Read gestures in a context

Mirroring

When body language and speech characteristics are mirrored or synchronized between people this tends to assist the process of creating and keeping rapport (a mutual feeling of empathy, understanding, trust).

When another person displays similar body language to our own, this makes us react unconsciously to feel, "This person is like me and agrees with the way I am. I like this person because we are similar, and he/she likes me too."

Dress Your Best

Business Attire

Business attire

Formals & Friday Dressing

Belts, Shoes & Socks

Colors that Work and Don’t

Scarves & Ties

Accessorizing

Business Attire-Formals Men

Formal full-sleeve shirts & formal trousers with or without a jacket

You can wear short sleeves on casual days.

Wear khaki trousers, chinos, etc on casual days only

Clothes should be neat and well-ironed

Business Attire-Colors That Work & Don’t

Avoid wearing bright colors.

Men should wear solid colored shirts. Colors to wear are whites, blues and other light colors. Avoid bold stripes or checks on workdays

In trousers men should wear navy blue, black, charcoal, etc.

Women can experiment with color but should stick to wearing lighter colors

Business Attire-Formals & Women

You can wear western formals, a business suit or a shirt & trouser with a scarf

Indian formals, a sari or a salwar khameez

Wear dress shoes, no sandals other than casual days and chappals, are a complete No - No.

Business Attire-Belts, Shoes & Socks

The color of your belt & shoes must match

Wear belts with simple buckles for your formal and semi-formal trousers.

Avoid huge chunky buckles for your belts.

Use conservative shades for your belts

Wear leather shoes only on work days.

Business Attire-Belts, Shoes & Socks

Polish your shoes

Socks need to be long enough to cover your leg

Try and match the color of your socks to your trousers whenever possible or wear white socks

Business Attire- Scarves

Women can wear scarves with their western formals

Remember Less is Better is the rule!

Lesser the contrast between the clothes and the scarf, the better

Lesser the print on the scarf the better.

Business Attire-Ties

Wear good quality ties

Stick to solid colors, geometric prints and stripes

Avoid bold colors and in-your-face prints

Contrast your shirt and tie

Do not wear heavy jewelry

Try and match your bags/purses to your clothing

Carry leather bags/purses preferably to look professional

Wear subtle wrist watches

Business Attire-Accessorizing

Thank You