L E A D E R S H I P T R A I N I N GE Q U I P P E D

S E S S I O N 1 V I S I O N O F R O L E

Introduction

God, the Relationship Initiator

Before the universe was made, God eternally enjoyed perfect fellowship within

Himself as the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. As an overflow of that fellowship,

desiring to maximize His glory, He created man in His image. Man was to live

with God in intimate fellowship, communing with Him face-to-face.

Sin, the Relationship Breaker

But mankind – believing the serpent’s lie that God’s rules came from a

burdensome, angry taskmaster rather than a loving, protective Father – chose

to disregard God’s fellowship and sought to be their own god (Gen 3:1-6).

Immediately as Adam and Eve disobeyed God, sin entered the world. This

fractured the relationship between God and man. Rather than finding joyful

refuge in God, they hid from him in terror (Gen 3:8).

This one sinful act has had devastating effects on all relationships – our

relationship with God and with one another. All throughout the Scriptures, we

see case after case of people fighting, lying, betraying, and backbiting one

another. But, sin didn’t just make life hard and relationships painful, it also

came with the judgement of death (Rom 6:23). Because of our sin we stand

deserving the wrath of God, in desperate need of redemption. Because of His

holiness, we deserve to be separated from Him forever.

Jesus, the Relationship Reconciler

But God desired that we should once again be in communion with Him.

Sending His Son, Jesus, He brought us back into fellowship with Him. Jesus

lived a perfectly righteous life and died a sufficient, substitutionary death on

our behalf. He rose from the grave, proving that He is victorious over death and

sin. He then ascended into Heaven and now stands at the right hand of the

Father, making intercession for those who trust in Him by faith.

When the Son became a man through the Incarnation, He displayed perfect

fellowship with the Father and delighted to do His will. He loved God with His

whole person – heart, body, and mind. He also showed us the supreme

benchmark of love by letting go of His life for us (John 15:13), so that we could

inherit eternal life. Jesus’ relationship with God and man is our model for

fellowship with the Father and one another.

Jesus’ life, death, and resurrection brought reconciliation between man and

God as well as man and man. We are reconciled to God because our sins are

completely forgiven and we are considered “children of God” (1 John 3:1). We

are reconciled to one another because God has created “in himself one new

man,” (Eph 2:15) crushing all divisions between us. We are no longer slaves to

sin, but slaves to righteousness (Rom 6:17-18), called to love another with the

affection of Christ (John 15:12).

Church, the Relationship Cultivator

This “one new man” unity is manifested in the local church. As people believe

the gospel, they’re adopted into God’s family, and express their new identity as

children of God by living in gospel fellowship with other family members in a

local church. We extend Jesus’ redemptive work as we care for those in the

church – showing compassion to the sufferer, encouragement to the faint-

hearted, and restoration to the sin-ensnared (Gal 6:1). We embolden one another

to “love and good works” (Heb 10:24). We encourage one another to make God

known to to all people, declaring the gospel message in our families,

neighborhoods, workplaces, schools, and anywhere else our feet may land. By

this we obey God’s word and make known the love of Christ.

God’s relational nature, sin’s effects, Jesus’ redemption, and the Church’s

mission are all on display in the church. In our small groups this is tangibly

fleshed out and we can, in the words of Paul Tripp, live as “instruments in the

Redeemers hands.” This course is designed to help you best facilitate this reality.

The Body of Christ

In Paul’s letter to the Ephesians we find that God calls the church the Body of

Christ (Eph 1:23). Jesus being the head, He leads the Body and we, through our

obedience to His Word, are participants in His work in the world. This Body has

many different members with each believers’ skills and abilities working

together to produce fruitful work. There are no lesser or greater member as each

part if vital to the body’s health and effectiveness (1 Cor 12:12-26).

Your pastor(s) desire(s) “to equip the saints for the work of ministry” (Eph

4:11-16), and to do this well. We also want to ensure that we’re all being “doers of

the Word, and not hearers only” (James 1:22). Here’s the holistic view of how we

seek to do this:

We call this the “Essentials at Ashland.” It’s the bones (or structure) of our

discipleship – of how our people are trained up towards love and faithfulness to

Jesus. We can create the bones but…

You are the muscles.

We see Bible Fellowship Groups (BFGs) as the prime arena for disciple-making.

Because of this, healthy, effective BFG Leaders are vital to our success in making

and developing disciples of the Lord Jesus. Without BFG Leaders, the ministry

of our church is greatly hindered. It’s the heart of your pastoral staff to equip

you to be an effective leader of your BFG.

The Goals of a BFG

Spiritual Growth

BFG should be a place of spiritual activity where an awareness of the Spirit and

a desire to conform all of life to Christ and His Word is cultivated. BFGs will pray

and discuss / apply God’s Word together.

Fellowship

The Christian life is not lived in isolation. Growth in Christ and change towards

His likeness is a community project. God calls us to live with Him in the context

of relationships – especially relationships with members of our local church.

BFGs provide the context for:

• Developing biblical friendships

• Caring for one another through trials, bearing one another’s burdens

• Celebrating joyful occasions and enjoying one another

• Serving side-by-side in our church and community

• Sharing God’s Word with one another for encouragement and

accountability

• Confessing our sins to one another and pursuing repentance and

reconciliation

Mission

BFGs are not “holy huddles” where Christians get together to simply talk about

the Bible, but are gospel battalions that march the gospel forward. They’re

conduits through which new disciples of Jesus are being made and brought

into the church. They also strategically and sacrificially serve the community

around them. Think of your BFG as a “missional community,” on mission to

proclaim the excellencies of God and His gospel.

The Charge of the BFG Leader

Promote Spiritual Growth

Each meeting centers around Jesus and the Word of God. You’ll do this by:

• Leading the group in prayer

• Leading the group in sermon-application discussion

• You’ll develop application-oriented questions for discussion in

advance. At times, questions may be provided for you by the

pastoral staff.

• Keep the discussion focused on practical application of

Scripture.

• Ensure the discussion stays centered on Christ and anchored

in Scripture.

• Promoting the private practice of spiritual disciplines (Scripture

reading, prayer, engaging in corporate worship, etc).

It’s vital that all of this is saturated in the gospel – that it’s by grace alone,

through faith alone, in Christ alone that we have fellowship with God.

Cultivate Biblical Fellowship

Biblical fellowship involves accountability, care, and sharing life with one

another. You have the opportunity to encourage and foster relationships as the

leader.

You do this by:

• Facilitating personal interaction in meeting contexts

• Organizing care in crisis

• Planning and promoting “Life Nights” (fun, leisurely activities for

your group)

• Celebrating milestones in members’ lives (birthdays, marriages,

baptisms, etc)

• Arranging follow-up meetings with members as needed

Lead in Mission

Just as God has gifted His whole body with a diverse array of gifts, your BFG is

made up of folks with differing gifts. It’s your job to discover, cultivate, and

leverage these gifts for maximum gospel-proclaiming effectiveness. Here are

some ways you can practically lead your BFG towards greater Kingdom

effectiveness:

• Ensure they’re serving the local church in some way (e.g., Journey

Kids, Music, Frontline, College, Tech Team, etc).

• Organizing service projects for the community, church, and

individual members

• Encouraging (and if you’re gifted in this way, training) each member

in sharing the gospel

• Encouraging members to invite others to your BFG

The Commitment of the Pastoral Staff to You

You’re not alone in this task. It’s our goal to give you the necessary tools and

training for you to be an effective leader. We’ll partner with you in caring for

those in your group. We’ll be accessible and approachable when needs arise.

Ultimately, we’re responsible for the spiritual care of those in your group. We’ll

walk beside you as you aim to be faithful to lead those under your care towards

love and faithfulness to the God who rescues us.

S E S S I O N 2 A R T O F F A C I L I T A T I O N A N D

D I S C I P L E S H I P

The Heart of Change

God wants our whole person. He is not interested in mere outward appearances.

His goal for us is not superficial confession of sin our mere outward behavioral

change.

No, he wants to change us from the heart – the inner core of who we are; the

seat of beliefs, values, feelings, and decisions. The heart is what ultimately

affects our words and actions (Luke 6:43-45). You do, think, believe, and are

what you love.

So, in leading our BFG, the goal is to help members understand their

circumstances, struggles, and sins in reference to the heart, and their need to be

transformed by the Word and the Spirit in their thinking and desires.

Only the living Word of God can “search and discern” the heart (Heb 4:12). True

change in a person’s life is only possible through the application of the Word of

God by the Spirit of God. Because of this, we base our entire meeting time

around the Word of God and dependence on the Spirit of God.

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“ ‘…you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart

and with all your soul and with all your mind and will

all your strength.’ “

– Jesus (Mark 12:30)

“For you will not delight in sacrifice, or I would give

it; you will not be pleased with a burnt offering.

The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken

and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.”

– King David (Psalm 51:16–17)

Arrows in the King’s Hands

We, in and of ourselves, do not possess the power to change our own or anyone

else’s heart. No matter how hard we strive, think, strategize, and/or agonize, we

can’t twist a heart of stone into a heart of flesh. But God promised long ago that

He, Himself would:

We receive the fulfillment of this promise by grace through faith in Jesus. When

a person puts their trust in Jesus alone, the Spirit indwells within them, giving

them power to fight sin and walk in obedience to the Father (Eph. 1:13-14; Titus

3:5-6, 2 Peter 1:3-4; 1 John 4:13-15).

The gift of life change is unlocked by Jesus, alone. It is to this reality that we

must consistently point our people. We are not the solution to our people’s

problems; we are simply arrows pointing to the One who is.

Reflection

Why must we embrace and employ a Jesus-centered approach to change?

How are you believing and acting like you’re the solution to others’ problems

and/or sinful habits and actions? What does this reveal about your heart?

What can you do to lead yourself and others to believe and act like Jesus is our

only helper?

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“And I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will

put within you. And I will remove the heart of stone

from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. And I will

put my Spirit within you, and cause you to walk in my

statutes and be careful to obey my rules.”

– Ezekiel 36:26-27

Head | Heart | Hands

It is absolutely crucial for us to understand that life change does not happen

outside of the work and Person of God. While this is true, God delights in using

us as instruments in His hands. We can be used as guides to help others to, as

we’ve said before, understand their circumstances, struggles, and sins through

the lens of their own heart, and their need to be transformed by the Word and

the Spirit in their thinking and desires.

We do this by asking the right questions.

“Head” Questions

These questions seek to gauge your people’s understanding of the Biblical text

and the preached Word from that morning’s sermon. You’re answering the

question, “Do they get it?”

Examples:

• Paul’s conversion gives us a context for the gospel. What does this mean?

• How does a gospel-centered view of diversity differ from our culture’s thoughts of tolerance?

• How does being upfront about our sin lead us to the grace in the gospel?

“Heart” Questions

These questions seek to reveal and analyze the heart of your people, specifically.

Whereas “head” questions can be answered in a general sense, “heart” questions

are deeply personal. They’re designed to dig up the “why” in people – their

motivations, presuppositions, & leanings – and “how” they respond to God’s

pressing in one their life.

Examples:

• What have you told God you just will not do? Why?

• What peoples are you most guilty of categorizing according to prejudices?

• What are some good things God has given you that you’ve turned into idols?

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“Hand” Questions

These questions seek to answer, “What are you going to do?” “Head” questions

gauge a person’s understanding, “heart” questions gauge a person’s

responsiveness to the Word, and “hand” questions presses those two together

and asks, “Now what?” These questions seek to graciously apply pressure

towards being “doers of the word, and not hearers only” (James 1:22).

Examples:

• How will you stop trying to be Jesus and seek to be with Jesus?

• God showed us the greatest hospitality and welcomed us into His family. How will you show this gospel-hospitality this week?

• Who will you share the gospel with this week?

Head, Heart, and Hands Together

Why are each of these question types helpful in leading people towards greater

love and faithfulness to Jesus?

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“Now when they heard this they were cut to the heart,

and said to Peter and the rest of the Apostles, ‘Brothers,

what shall we do?’ “

– Acts 2:37

The Heart is the Target

We do, think, believe, and are what we love. Our affections lead us to certain

beliefs and actions. So, we must turn our affections toward and love the right

thing. As the leader of your BFG, your goal is to help your people understand

and do this. This is hard. It’s common for group members to want to move

immediately toward practical help or superficial change without addressing the

heart. Here’s an example:

Problem: “At my work they’re laying people off like crazy, and I think my

department is next. I’m worried I’m going to lose my job!”

Response 1: “My company has been hiring, lately. Maybe I can help you get on.”

(This is helpful information, but doesn’t address the heart)

Response 2: “Are you reading your Bible before you go to work? I think if you

did that, it’d help you with your stress on the job. It helps me.”

(Good practice, but doesn’t adequately apply the Word to this specific

situation and the response of the heart to it)

Response 3: “The Bible says, ‘My God shall provide for all your needs.’ You just

have to trust that God will provide.”

(True and good, but to find this trust, we have to dig deeper into who God

is, how we fail to believe Him, how to discard the false beliefs we have

about Him, and then lay hold of His promises)

Response 4: “What exactly do you fear? Who is the Lord in this situation? How

does your fear reflect what you believe about God?”

(This is the best a group can give. It gets to the heart, helps root out fear

that may grow from pride and a denial of who God is, and cultivates faith

in the character and promises of God)

We don’t neglect the practical needs of the group members – far from it! – but,

our primary concern is that we target the root sin issues of their heart and apply

the gospel to it.

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Men, Women, and Jesus

God created both men and women as His image bearers, and so both are equal

in personhood, worth, and dignity (Gen. 1:27). Both men and women are to

exercise godly dominion over the earth, and while they share this mandate, God

clearly made men and women different, assigning distinct and complementary

roles (Gen. 2:15-23).

Why does this matter?

What should we do about it?

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Because of this distinction, we have a responsibility to disciple men and women

together and separately. Practically speaking, this means that, at times, men

need to be with only men, and women need to be with only women. A single-

sex context promotes freedom to appropriately discuss sensitive topics,

allowance for more specific confession of sin, and unique opportunities for

men to deepen relationships with the men and women to do the same with

other women.

We do this through a variety of contexts:

BAM Breakfast (Men) / T2W Meetings (Men)

These once-a-month meetings are based around a topic of teaching/discussion

related to biblical manhood and womanhood, respectively. The men meet on

the first Saturday of every month, and the women meet on the first Tuesday of

every month (excluding summer months).

Fight Club (Men) / T2W Group (Women)

These groups of 3-4 men or women meet regularly for more intense

accountability than what is typically appropriate in a larger BFG context.

Typically, a group will walk through a series of accountability questions

(provided by the church), applying the gospel to each situation in each

members’ lives. There’s flexibility in how often these groups meet, some

choosing to meet once a week, twice a month, or once a month.

BFG Breakouts

Once a month, many BFGs will have a men’s/women’s breakout time, where the

men and women of the BFG will discuss the sermon, separately, or will go

outside of the home for a time of gender-specific fellowship. This could happen

during the BFG’s typical meeting time, or serve as an additional time of

fellowship.

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BFG Breakouts (continued)

• Transferring Biblical Manhood

• In a men’s meeting, opportunities exist for men to grow in

their biblical understanding and conviction to lead, protect,

provide, and serve in the context of their home, workplace,

and community.

• In each meeting, the leader should remind the men in some

way of their God-given call and privilege to grow in biblical

masculinity.

• Transferring Biblical Womanhood

• The leader’s wife or other woman leads the ladies in her group

by transferring the values of biblical womanhood through her

example and their discussion. In doing this, the ladies may

increasingly orient themselves as Christian woman to their

God-given faith (Tit. 2:3-5)

• Recognize that while practices may differ among the ladies in

your group, biblical principles of femininity will remain the

same.

It’s the responsibility of each BFG leader to encourage each member of their

BFG to:

1. Attend the upcoming BAM Breakfast/T2W Meeting

2. Be integrated into a Fight Club/T2W Group

3. Lead BFG Breakout times.

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The Essentials of Discipleship

You are not the sole discipler of those in your BFG. Everyone in your BFG needs

the whole church to grow towards greater love and faithfulness to Jesus. If the

church is Christ’s body, then each part needs every other part for the body to

function properly.

While the discipleship mandate is not solely your responsibility, you do play a

massive role in influencing those in your BFG towards engaging with the whole

church. You do this by encouraging engagement in Worship, BFG, and Service/

Mission.

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As you lead your BFG, it’s your responsibility that the members of your BFG are:

1. Engaged in worship

2. Committed to your BFG

3. Joyfully serving the Body of Christ

Leading people to follow Jesus more deeply is more than asking good questions

and meeting regularly (though those are good and necessary practices). It’s

shepherding their hearts well, and you can’t do that on your own. It requires the

whole church, under the preaching of God’s Word, serving together for the

mission of spreading God’s Kingdom and glory from our city to the ends of the

earth.

NOTES

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S E S S I O N 3 G R O W T H & O U T R E A C H

Growth2

In gauging the health of a BFG we look at a number of factors. For the purposes

of this training, we’ll focus on two specifically related to growth: (1) the spiritual

growth of each BFG member, and (2) the numerical growth of the BFG as a

whole (including the attendance regularity of each member). We’ve found that a

positive correlation exists between these two variables. As members move

towards greater spiritual health (see also: an increased love for and faithfulness

to God and zeal for His glory), the group attendance on the whole rises, as well.

Some folks cringe when the words “numerical growth” are used in a ministry

context. There’s an assumption that a focus on growth in attendance leads

churches to sacrifice spiritual growth on the altar of numerical growth. In some

church environments, this is unfortunately true. Some churches will do

everything short of sin to get people in their doors, and are “all about the

numbers.”

But, this is not the case at Ashland. See, those numbers are not a mere metric of

ministerial success, but people made in the image of God whom He loves and

created for His purposes. The heartbeat of our church is to see others follow

Jesus, so numerical growth in congregational worship and/or BFG attendance

is seen as a blessing from God. Our mission is to invest the gospel of Jesus into

as many people as we can. Because of this, we have a strong commitment to

growth.

So, why is it that when group members grow spiritually the group attendance

grows, as well? Simple. As people come together to pray with and for one

another, read the Scriptures together, confess sin, express how the Lord is

working in their lives, and hold one another accountable, they grow in their

love for and faithfulness to the Lord. As their love for God increases, their desire

for others to experience His goodness also increases, compelling them to bring

others into contexts where they can experience His goodness.

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Growth and Intentionality

But, growth doesn’t happen unintentionally. While it’s true that people will lean

towards bringing folks in as they grow, an intentional, outreach-focused vision

maximizes this initiative. From day one, the leader should cast the vision that

the goal for the BFG is to bring in more people to experience the goodness of

God through Christian community. This outward-oriented reorientation should

happen regularly. Creating contexts where your members can invite others

with ease is crucial. We’ll explore this more in a later section (pg. 5).

Multiply, Don’t (Just) Add

Adding new people to your BFG is a mark of a healthy BFG, but not the goal. The

ultimate goal for every BFG is multiplication.

By multiplication, we mean BFGs that plant BFGs, that plant BFGs, that plant

BFGs…

A BFG of 30 (or more) people is not the goal. For the depth of friendship and

level of accountability we want in our BFGs, the ideal number of committed,

regularly attending members is 10-12 adults (not including children). Why?

People tend to be less transparent about their lives in larger groups, and are less

likely to contribute to discussion when groups grow above these numbers

numerically. Typically, if a group reaches 15-20 active members, about half of

the members regularly contribute to the discussion, while the other half simply

observe. This isn’t helpful if our goal is personal, sermon-based application with

genuine accountability.

Through BFG multiplication, our gospel influence exponentially grows. As new

BFGs are planted throughout our city, new people are engaged with the gospel

as the members of each BFG seek to invest the gospel into their lives.

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Wait, You Want Us to Divide the Group?

No, we want you to multiply your group. We use the term, “multiply,” with great

intentionality. “Dividing” carries a negative connotation and implies a lack of

intentionality. “Multiplying” carries with it the idea of intentional growth and a

mission.

A group that divides simply becomes two stagnating groups. A group that

multiplies becomes two groups that multiply. The multiplying DNA of the first

carries on into the second. As these groups continue to be faithful to Christ and

seek multiplication, more groups with the same DNA are planted, and so on. So

from one BFG comes many, many other BFGs, all having the same goal:

multiplication.

The hope is that this continues on and on and we see a significantly greater

gospel impact in our community.

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Does this mean that some members of your BFG will leave to start a new one?

Yes. Can this be difficult? Certainly. But, if the DNA of your BFG is to reach as

many people with the gospel as possible, that difficulty is overpowered by a

great joy, knowing that more people are being discipled towards greater love for

and faithfulness to Jesus.

How Do We Know that a BFG is Ready to Multiply?

1. Members attend faithfully. We measure this by…

• The same people showing up each meeting, week-to-week

• Members are actively engaged in sermon-based, application-oriented

discussion and outreach events

2. Members are bringing new folks in, and those new folks are staying

(numerical growth and stability)

3. The BFG is “mature” enough to multiply

• If the BFG has only been planted for 3 months and has 20+ people

coming, we would not necessarily recommend a multiplication. The

BFG needs time to stabilize, and relationships need to be given time to

establish deep roots.

• As an example, one BFG that was planted saw a rapid surge in

attendance — nearly 30 people — in just a few weeks, but those

numbers dropped significantly to typically 10 regular attenders

after a few months. The other 10-20 people involved were hit-

and-miss in attendance. Week-to-week they saw high

attendance totals, but the people were different, so it lacked

stability.

4. A new leader is identified, developed, and ready to be sent out

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Developing Leaders

In thinking about multiplication, it’s essential to hone in on leadership

development. It almost goes without saying, but without a BFG leader, there is

no BFG.

Identify

What characteristics should I look for?

• Growing in godliness in personal life

• Regular attendance in worship & BFG

• Active, helpful participation in discussion and outreach events

• Regularly serving the church

• Invites and brings others to worship service and/or BFG

Develop

Give them opportunities to…

• Facilitate the discussion

• Lead the prayer time

• Lead the Men’s/Women's Breakout time

• Plan a ministry event (outreach, service, etc)

• Organize / coordinate meals, Life Nights, etc.

…and provide feedback (repeat)

Recommend the leader to the pastoral staff for additional training.

Send

Launch them out with “anchor members”

• “Anchor members” are those in your (or another) BFG who are

committed to the vision of multiplication who will help the new BFG

leader establish a healthy, growth-oriented BFG. They already possess

the DNA of multiplication

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• In considering who should go with the new leaders, make it a

collaborative effort. Ask the leader who they want to take with them,

and encourage those members to go.

• It’s not recommended that many members from your BFG are sent

out with the new leader, as the goal here is multiplication. The new

BFG leaders responsibility is to engage new people to join their BFG.

One or two families (3-4 adults) from your (or another) BFG is

sufficient to get started.

Reach Out

A robust outreach culture feeds the mission of the BFG to make disciples of

Jesus Christ. Without it, the BFG becomes insular, and a “me-focused” BFG

atrophies. Members’ preferences take prominence and the group can lose their

purpose for meeting. So, how do we create an outreach culture?

• Weekly Invites – Each week, ask the members of your BFG who they’re

going to invite or who they’ve invited to attend

• Encourage your members to orient their prayer requests towards those

outside the BFG – specifically, those who need the gospel

• Plan a quarterly outreach/service event intended with specific intention to

serve those in your neighborhood/community

• Life Nights

• Embrace and encourage biblical hospitality (more on this in the next

meeting)

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Questions to Consider

Explain the concept of “growth” in a ministry context. How do you react to this?

Should we care about a BFGs numerical growth? Why or why not?

Explain the concept of “multiplication” in your own words as it relates to BFGs.

Why is multiplication so essential to us? How engaged are you in the process of

multiplying your BFG?

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How are you intentionally leading your BFG towards a growth-oriented vision?

How can you more effectively lead in this area?

Based on the four (4) criteria we use to measure a BFG’s readiness to multiply,

what needs to happen in order for your BFG to multiply?

Who is/are your potential future leader/leaders? How are you developing them?

How can you more effectively do so?

Who are your “anchor families”?

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How are you currently building an “inviting” culture? How can you more

effectively foster this culture?

What events and/or service projects can your group do to maximize your

outreach impact? Think about the people in your group. What gifts and abilities

are present? When will you do these events and/or service projects?

Additional Notes

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A P P E N D I X 1 H O S P I T A L I T Y A N D B E S T P R A C T I C E S

When to Meet

Each week unless we tell you otherwise in light of calendar, church wide

conflicts, or you’ve served during Access. Please let Clay Tabor know if you are

not meeting and why.

Context: The Home

Your home is to be a place of fellowship – sharing the gospel together.

Relationships are to be formed not just socially but through the applying of the

gospel to our lives. Host homes must create an atmosphere so this is possible by

embracing biblical hospitality.

Hospitality is more than welcoming at arms length, it’s inviting others to

experience family. A home is not a fortress to protect, but a weapon to wield for

gospel ministry. Your goal is to create an environment where everyone feels at

home, any time. Avoid creating an environment where people are nervous

about spilling drinks and breaking things. Give your “things” eternal value by

using them for gospel ministry. People, and their faithfulness to and love for

Christ is the ultimate priority. Encourage your BFG to employ biblical

hospitality by being on time for the sake of the new folks being welcomed.

Invite

Most people are yearning for real friendships. Often, all it takes to initiate a

gospel friendship is a simple invite. Look for guests at church. Build

relationships within your neighborhood. Welcome coworkers.

When inviting, be crystal clear about time, place, and directions. Invite guest

over during the week to hangout and see your home. Explain what happens

with the meal. If they ask, “What should I bring?” Tell them what to bring. After

they’ve attended feel free to ask, “Would you like to be on the text message /

Facebook Group / GroupMe?” (whatever you use to communicate). Most people

attend BFG because they are looking to be included in community. Don’t be

afraid to include them.

Communication

Communication needs to be frequent, clear, and precise. Whatever channel you

use to communicate, ensure that both men and women can see all

communication. Food and Hospitality can be handled separately. Suggestions:

Group texts, Facebook groups, GroupMe (app), Remind (app), etc.

Childcare

In order for folks to engage with the Word and one another, you want to create

an environment that is distraction-free. Children are a blessing from the Lord,

but can often cause distraction among group members when they’re trying to

process through how the Word is working in their lives.

Keep children (and animals) from disrupting the conversation. We recommend

having a room dedicated for the purpose of childcare. Start a rotation of group

members to watch children in that separate area. To do this, assign members to

weekly rotation where everyone has to serve (rather than an “Alright, who wants

to watch the kids tonight?” approach). You could also collectively hire childcare.

Food

Meals are a sign of intimacy. They are not required but helpful in

communicating family. Everyone can bring food for less than the cost of what

you would spend eating out or at home. Everyone bringing their own food

(from a drive-through, or otherwise) can be helpful at times, especially for host

homes. Consider, however, the cost for large families.

Alcohol policy

BFG leaders and host homes must refrain from the consumption of alcohol in

and around BFG activities.