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BECOMING A WINNER Defeating Problem Gambling
written by
David C. Hodgins, PhD
Karyn Makarchuk, MSc
Addictive Behaviours Laboratory, University of Calgary
TABLE OF CONTENTS
Introduction .................................................................................................................... 4
A. Self-assessment ..................................................................................................... 5 Is there a problem? 5
Negative consequences of gambling 7
Understanding more about your gambling: Increasing your self-awareness
8
Identifying your reasons for gambling 9
The financial costs of gambling 10
B. Making your decision ........................................................... ............................ 12 Benefits and costs of your gambling 12
Quitting or cutting back? 14
C. Reaching your goal................................................................. ............................ 17
D. Maintaining your goal …................................................................................. 32 Planning ahead 32
Slipping and relapse 33
Dealing with other life problems 34
E. Appendix ................................................................................................................... 35 Need More Help? 35
Changing your thinking: Understanding the
role that irrational thoughts play
17
Irrational and rational thinking 19
The concept of randomness 22
Dealing with urges 24
Staying away from gambling 29
Limiting your access to money 29
Telling others of your plan 31
Facing large debts 31
4
becoming a winner
INTRODUCTION
A problem gambler is a person who is spending time and money
gambling in such a way that it is harmful to them. Gambling can take
many forms, ranging from buying lottery tickets to betting on sports and
playing jackpot. If you feel that you have a problem with gambling, then
this manual will help you to explore your gambling behaviour and to
develop ways to change or stop it completely. The use of self-help
manuals has proven successful with other problems, such as alcohol and
drug use. This manual will emphasize teaching skills for self-
observation and self-control. If, after completing this manual, your
problem persists or if you feel you require more assistance, a list of
other available resources is provided (see Appendix).
This booklet is divided into five sections. The first will help you
understand the extent and nature of your problem. The second helps
you define your goal. The third helps you develop and implement
plans for reaching your goal. The fourth section discusses
maintaining your goal. The last section provides information about
other resources.
5
A. SELF-ASSESSMENT
Is there a problem?
About 49% of
Singaporeans gamble in
any given year. For most
of these people, gambling
is merely a form of
entertainment. However,
some people have a level
of gambling that is causing
harm to themselves and
those around them. These
problems can range from
mild to severe. Anyone can
have a problem with
gambling.
self-assessment
5
5
6
The Problem Gambling Severity Index will give you a good idea of whether or not you have
a problem with gambling.
Thinking about the last 12 months…
1. Have you bet more than you could really afford to lose?
0 Never 1 Sometimes 2 Most of the time 3 Almost always.
2. Still thinking about the last 12 months, have you needed to gamble with larger amounts of money
to get the same feeling of excitement?
0 Never 1 Sometimes 2 Most of the time 3 Almost always.
3. When you gambled, did you go back another day to try to win back the money you lost?
0 Never 1 Sometimes 2 Most of the time 3 Almost always.
4. Have you borrowed money or sold anything to get money to gamble?
0 Never 1 Sometimes 2 Most of the time 3 Almost always.
5. Have you felt that you might have a problem with gambling?
0 Never 1 Sometimes 2 Most of the time 3 Almost always.
6. Has gambling caused you any health problems, including stress or anxiety?
0 Never 1 Sometimes 2 Most of the time 3 Almost always.
7. Have people criticized your betting or told you that you had a gambling problem, regardless of
whether or not you thought it was true?
0 Never 1 Sometimes 2 Most of the time 3 Almost always.
8. Has your gambling caused any financial problems for you or your household?
0 Never 1 Sometimes 2 Most of the time 3 Almost always.
9. Have you felt guilty about the way you gamble or what happens when you gamble?
0 Never 1 Sometimes 2 Most of the time 3 Almost always.
TOTAL SCORE
Total your score. The higher your score, the greater the risk that your gambling is a problem.
Score of 0 Non-problem gambling
Score of 1 or 2 Low level of problems with few or no identified negative consequences
Score of 3 to 7 Moderate level of problems leading to some negative consequences
Score of 8 or more Problem gambling with negative consequences and a possible loss of
control
7
self-assessment
Negative consequences of gambling
Gambling can cause problems in other areas of your life. What are some of the
problems that you are facing now or may face in future?
GAMBLING CAN LEAD TO THIS IS A
PROBLEM TO
ME NOW
I MAY FACE THIS PROBLEM
IN THE FUTURE
(if I continue gambling)
1. job-related problems ❑ ❑
2. family or marital conflicts ❑ ❑
3. financial problems ❑ ❑
4. legal problems ❑ ❑
5. physical health problems ❑ ❑
6. self-disgust ❑ ❑
7. emotional health problems ❑ ❑
8. low self-esteem ❑ ❑
9. thoughts of suicide ❑ ❑
10. having no time for other things ❑ ❑
11. others ❑ ❑
Stopped at a casino while
looking for a job.
Frustrated, discouraged, feeling broke.
If I made a big win then I wouldn’t need a job. It would solve my problems.
$ 500 lost
becoming a winner
Understanding more about your gambling:
Increasing your self-awareness
People who gamble regularly often do so without thinking. They
do not pay attention to the factors that are related to their
desire to gamble. It is useful to pay attention to these factors to
help you regain control over your gambling.
Think back to the last three times you gambled:
WHERE/SITUATION FEELINGS BEFORE THOUGHTS BEFORE AND DURING AMOUNT $
1.
2.
3.
8
self-assessment
Identifying your reasons for gambling
This checklist will help you to identify your reasons for
gambling. Check off which ones apply to you.
REASONS FOR GAMBLING NEVER SOMETIMES EVERY TIME
1. feeling bored ❑ ❑ ❑
2. feeling depressed ❑ ❑ ❑
3. feeling lonely ❑ ❑ ❑
4. for pleasure or entertainment ❑ ❑ ❑
5. to escape from problems or
forget troubles ❑ ❑ ❑
6. out of habit ❑ ❑ ❑
7. for excitement ❑ ❑ ❑
8. problems at home ❑ ❑ ❑
9. problems at work ❑ ❑ ❑
10. feeling broke (worrying about debt)❑ ❑ ❑
11. to get money ❑ ❑ ❑
12. to meet with people ❑ ❑ ❑
13. to avoid people ❑ ❑ ❑
14. to celebrate ❑ ❑ ❑
15. to chase after losses ❑ ❑ ❑
16. others ❑ ❑ ❑
9
becoming a winner
The financial costs of gambling
Problem gamblers often focus on the “wins” which feel good and
ignore the “losses” which feel bad. Let’s examine the actual cost of
your gambling over the past 30 days:
1. Fill in the dates for the past month.
2. Write down any holidays and special events in that month.
3. Record what days you gambled and what kind of gambling you
participated in.
4. Record the amount of cash you started out with, how much you
finished with, and any details of the session you can recall.
5. Is this a typical month for you? Add up how much you spent on
gambling per month.EXAMPLE:
SUN MON TUES WED THURS FRI SAT
1 2 3 4 5 6
7 8 9
Pay Day-
Casino – lost
entire salary
(Lost $500)
10 11 12
Lottery ticket
spent $2 (lost $2)
13
14 15
Birthday
16 17
Lottery ticket
spent $2 (lost
$2)
18 19 20
21 22
Won $150 from
Jackpot- Casino
(Won $150)
23 24
Lottery ticket
spent $2 (lost
$2)
25 26 27
My birthday- played
jackpot with $100
(lost it ) took another
$100 (lost $200)
28
Big Sweep
bought 3- all
Lost (lost $3)
29 30
4D ticket- spent
$2 (lost $2)
SUN MON TUES WEDS THURS FRI SAT
1 2
Went to the club –
Jackpot spent
son’s school fees
(lost $75)
3 4
Total losses ($786)
Total wins $150
My gambling cost me: $636
Sep
temb
er O
ctob
er
10
11
self-assessment
Tracking your gambling costs:
1. Fill in the dates for the past month.
2. Write down any holidays and special events in that month.
3. Record what days you gambled and what kind of gambling you participated in.
4. Record the amount of cash you started out with, how much you finished with, and any
details of the session you can recall.
5. Is this a typical month for you? Add up how much you spent on gambling per month.
Total losses $
Total wins $
My gambling cost me: $
11
SUN MON TUES WED THURS FRI SAT
SUN MON TUES WED THURS FRI SAT
‘Yasmin’
I started to hang out at a pub to drink my sorrows away when my marriageended ten years ago and befriended some of the pub goers. One of themsuggested that I go to a casino with her. I badly needed some excitement todrown my sorrows, so I went with her. That’s when I got hooked on jackpot.Things went out of hand when I lost my entire salary in one night. In orderto make ends meet, I borrowed from an illegal money-lender. I continued togamble with hopes of hitting the jackpot so I could repay my loans and covermy daily expenses. Before long, I chalked up a heap of debts from bothillegal and legal money-lenders who harassed me day and night when I wasunable to pay the weekly instalments.
My son had to stay with my ex-husband’s mother as I was unable to takecare of him. Even after selling my flat, I still could not clear the debts. Thestress of paying debts and the pain of not having my son living with me droveme to gambling again. As the debts piled up again, I went around borrowingmoney from my siblings, friends and colleagues. Initially they helped me tosettle my debts, but when I kept going back to borrow, they told me off andrefused to meet me or take my calls. It was then that I began to analyse mysituation. The excitement of winning and the time spent in the casinohelped me forget my sorrows from my broken marriage.
However, when the debts, harassment and pressure ofnot able to make ends meet came in, I lost my peace andsleep. Most importantly, I lost the loving relationshipwith my son, my siblings and my close friends. Now,I receive counselling to quit my gambling addiction andand to pay off my debts in instalments.
Self-assessment: Recognizing problem gambling
‘Yasmin’
Initially, I didn’t think I am addicted to gambling. After all, I have beengambling for more than 25 years. I started off with horse betting. However, Ifelt that the winnings were too low and switched to TOTO. At my worst, Icould spend up to $1,500 a week on TOTO. After spending all my money ongambling, I would have no money left for my daily expenses. This resultedin my electricity and water being cut off by PUB. I was also unable to applyfor more credit cards. On the verge of becoming bankrupt, I went fromborrowing from banks to borrowing from friends. When my friends refusedto lend me more money, I had to sell my house. In 6 months, I had spent$150,000 on gambling. During these times, I was constantly in a bad moodand easily agitated.
I thought I had my break when my company sent me to Taiwan for work. Ithought things would be better there. However, even when I was in Taiwan, Iwould call up friends in Singapore to buy 4D and TOTO for me. After I wonsome money during Chinese New Year, I promised my daughter that I wouldbring her and my wife to Taiwan for holiday. However, This promise wasnever fulfilled. I subsequently lost my job due to an economic crisis.
After losing my job, I met up with friends who encouraged me to drink andgamble. It escalated to borrowing from loan sharks. The harassment fromloan sharks drove me to attempt suicide twice. The second attempt atsuicide finally made me realize that I had a gambling problem. The policereferred me to IMH, where I realized the terrors of addiction and that I wassimply gambling for the thrill.
Now, I’ve learnt the importance of mixing withthe right crowd. I also spend more time withmy family. I found new hobbies where I can devoutmy time. I enjoy much more comfort and joy withthe financial security I have now and hope to fulfilmy promise to my daughter by bringing her to Taiwan. ‘Mike’
becoming a winner
B. Making your decision
Benefits and costs of your gambling
What will be good about changing your gambling habit?
In the table below, write down the benefits and costs of your gambling. Next, write down the
benefits and costs of NOT gambling.
It may help to look back at what you have identified in the previous sections. They may remind
you of why you want to change your gambling habits.
P
BENEFITS OF NOT GAMBLING
· I would have more money to spend.
· I would feel better about myself.
· I would have more time for other activities and to spend with my family.
BENEFITS OF GAMBLING
· I love the feeling of excitement after a big win.
· I can have money fast.
· I have fun when I gamble.
· It helps me to forget my troubles.
COSTS OF NOT GAMBLING
· I will have to face responsibility.
· I will have to somehow fill up my time.
· I will have to let go of the dream that I
will somehow win my losses back.
COSTS OF GAMBLING
· It has caused me legal problems.
· It has negatively affected myrelationships.
· I am heavily in debt.
· I am very depressed and anxious.
12
12
13
making your decision
Benefits and costs of your gambling:
Take a look at each of the points you have made. Is there anything you have missed? Which square has the most points? Circle the factors that are most important to you.
3
BENEFITS OF NOT GAMBLING BENEFITS OF GAMBLING
COSTS OF NOT GAMBLING COSTS OF GAMBLING
becoming a winner
Quitting or cutting down
There are three options after you have made the decision to
change.
1. Deciding to quit for good
Many people find that not gambling at all is the safest option.
2. Quitting a specific type (or types) of gambling
Some people stop the type(s) of gambling that have caused them
problems, but continue with other types of gambling (e.g. stop
visiting the casino but continue playing mah-jong).
This option can be more difficult than stopping gambling completely.
You must be alert to whether a problem is developing with another
type of gambling. (e.g. if you stop visiting the casino but play mah-
jong more often to try to win back money, then it is a sign that it’s
best to stop playing mah-jong as well.)
If you choose this option, then decide what you are stopping and what
you are continuing.
3. Cutting down
Some people choose to continue playing but limit their problem type
of gambling. This is usually the toughest choice because it can be
difficult to stay within your limits.
We strongly recommend that you quit gambling for two to three
weeks before making your final decision. During this period, you
will discover how you cope on your own with urges or temptations to
gamble.
Before you start, ask yourself the following questions:
1. Do I have the money to gamble at all right now?
For example, do I owe money? YES NO
2. In the past, was I able to control my gambling and
how much I spent on it? YES NO
14
15
making your decision
3. Will my family support my continued gambling and not be harmed by it,
even if my gambling is limited? YES NO
4. Can I gamble without wanting to win back money
that I have already lost? YES NO
If you answered “no” to any of the above questions, then trying to cut
down on your gambling may not be the best choice or an easy goal to
achieve.
The reason for this suggestion is that your continued gambling, even if it
is much less than it was, will likely worsen your financial situation,
upset people around you, and be difficult to achieve if it has been hard
to control your gambling in the past. More importantly, if your
motivation to gamble includes the idea of winning back money you have
lost, then you are at risk of making your problem worse.
If you decide to cut down on your gambling, it is important to take note
of the following:
· develop ways to avoid “chasing your losses” (that is, trying to
win back what you have lost)
· limit the time you will spend on gambling
· keep a daily record of your gambling (e.g. the amount of time spent
on gambling, number of times you gambled, wins and losses)
16
becoming a winner
Your gambling goal:
Choose ONE of the following options as your goal and sign your name.
This will act as a personal contract to yourself that will help you stay
committed to your goal.
1. Quitting for good sign
2. Quitting a specific type (or types) of gambling
Types of gambling allowed
Types of gambling NOT allowed
sign
3. Cutting down
Complete this section after you have stopped for two or
three weeks and have completed Section C, “Reaching
Your Goal.”
The number of days a week I can gamble
The maximum amount of time per session
The maximum amount of $ per session
The maximum amount of $ per week
sign
“It’s the people around us that are suffering from the consequences of gambling. Not us.”
“To fuel my gambling addiction, I resorted to stealing and robbery. I was
arrested and had to go to jail. My father, who had once attempted suicide
because of me, passed away when I was in jail. His last image of me was in
handcuffs escorted by the policemen.”
“A drug addict recognizes his addiction but a gambler addict is blind to his addiction.”
- Getai Veteran, Wang Lei
Making your decision: Social impacts of problem gambling
‘Boon’
‘Sum’
“When I was chased to repay my debts, I felt anxious, pressurized and frustrated. During my counselling sessions, I sat down and calculated the amount of money won against amount of money lost in lottery. It dawned on me that I lost more than I won, and the net amount lost could pay off a substantial amount of my debts. I realised that it was the pressure and harassment of being chased to repay loans and debts that drove me to try a shortcut of buying hope through lottery.”
“Gamblers failed in their Mathematics. They could lose thousands just to win a hundred and they wouldn’t feel the pain. “
- Getai Veteran, Wang Lei
Mental and emotional impacts of problem gambling
‘Lee’
17
reaching your goal
C. Reaching your goal
People who successfully overcome their gambling problem develop
many ways of coping. Many of these coping strategies are automatic.
Other strategies take effort and practice to learn.
Changing your thinking: Understanding
the role that irrational thoughts play
Most gamblers somewhat know that they will never win back all the
money they have lost, yet they continue to “chase their losses” and
continue gambling to try to recover what they’ve lost. In other words,
they rationally know the truth but when they get into
the situation, their thoughts and ideas become irrational.
People naturally “talk to themselves” constantly. This “self-talk” can
be positive and supportive, or it can be negative, irrational, and
frustrating to the self. Using positive self-talk to stop the urge to
gamble or to interrupt the habit of gambling can be very helpful. It
can also help to make your gambling less automatic.
Which are the irrational statements that you have made when you are
gambling or between gambling sessions?
❑ Gambling is an easy way to earn money.
❑ Gambling is a healthy leisure activity.
❑ My gambling is under control.
❑ I can win it back.
17
18
becoming a winner
18
❑ I’m smart; I have a system to beat the odds.
❑ Someday I’ll score a really big win.
❑ Gambling will be the solution to my problems.
❑ Gambling makes me feel better.
❑ I will pay it back.
❑ Stealing to gamble isn’t really stealing. The more money
I have to gamble with, the better my chances of winning.
❑ I’m a lucky person.
❑ I can’t control my gambling.
❑ I can stop anytime.
❑ Sometimes I behave as if I am two different persons.
❑ I can still afford to gamble.
❑ I have to make as much money as I can, as quickly as I
can.
❑ I always win.
❑ Even if I only have a few dollars, I’m better off taking a
chance. This is the last time I will gamble.
Take a moment to close your eyes and imagine you are
gambling or about to start gambling. Are there other
thoughts that go through your mind?
reaching your goal
Irrational and rational thinking
Knowing which irrational thoughts apply to you will help you understand
why these thoughts are irrational.
List two things that are irrational about each of the thoughts. Then go back
and write a rational thought to replace it. Write down anything else you
think you could do when you have these thoughts.
With practice, you can challenge these thoughts right away when you are
actually in the situation.
E X A M P L E :
IRRATIONAL THOUGHT:
Gambling is an easy way to earn money.
WHY IS IT IRRATIONAL?
a) I lose money much more than I win; therefore, in the long run I am
not really earning money.
b) It’s really not that “easy” since it causes me a great deal of time,
stress, and worries.
RATIONAL THOUGHT TO REPLACE IT:
Gambling is actually an easy way to lose money. It hardly earns me
any money
1) IRRATIONAL THOUGHT:
19
becoming a winner
Why is it irrational?
a)
b)
Rational thought to replace it:
2) IRRATIONAL THOUGHT:
Why is it irrational?
a)
b)
20
reaching your goal
Rational thought to replace it:
3) IRRATIONAL THOUGHT:
Why is it irrational?
a)
b)
Rational thought to replace it:
21
becoming a winner
The concept of randomness
There is a common belief is that if we play long enough we will
win. We “know” that the outcome we are waiting for will happen
if we hold on long enough.
We may have this belief because we don’t understand
that separate events in many gambling situations have absolutely no
relationship with each other.
Jackpot players often continue playing even if they have been
losing because they feel it is their turn to win soon. They feel
that the specific machine is due for a jackpot pay out. The fact is that
each spin is a separate event and is not affected by what has
happened before. A machine that has recently paid out is just as
likely to pay out as one that has not.
Similarly, in roulette, each number has 1/38 chance of winning on
a particular spin. If you observe the game for a period of time and
notice that a particular number (say 23) has not come up for a long
time, it may seem logical to think it must be coming up soon. Each
spin of the wheel is a separate event. Number 23 has 1/38 chance
of winning on any spin. The roulette wheel does not have a
memory.
Gambling takes advantage of this common mistaken belief. We
easily believe that our number is due to come up because it hasn’t
happened for a while.
22
reaching your goal
In what situations does this mistaken belief cause you to keep
gambling?
E X A M P L E :
· When I have a near miss [3 cherries instead of 4], I keep playing because
I feel I am really “close” to a win.
· After a string of losses, I keep playing since I feel I am due for a win.
· After a string of wins, I tend to bet more money since I feel like I am getting
“good” at the game.
23
24
becoming a winner
Dealing with urges
To stop or control your gambling, it is important for you to learn ways to
cope with urges and temptations. You may feel the strongest urge during the
first few weeks after quitting.
Before you learn new ways of coping, do you know what your existing coping
skills are? The exercise below will help you identify what causes you to gamble
so that you are more aware of the risky situations.
There are two types of effective coping:
1) By thinking:
Fight the urge to gamble using self-talk.
Research has shown that people who had successfully
overcome a gambling problem used ‘thinking’ strategies.
This includes remembering past gambling problems and
thinking about how well they were doing to achieve their
goal.
2) By acting:
Stay away from gambling by doing other activities.
More than half of the people interviewed who overcame
their gambling problems successfully reported a change
in their lifestyle. Almost half made a change in their
social life.
Recording your urges and coping strategies can:
a) increase your understanding of the role that gambling
plays in your life, and
b) help you identify the most effective ways for avoiding
gambling
24
25
reaching your goal
Write down examples of when you have effectively coped with an urge to gamble in the past:
EXAMPLE:
Where were you and with whom?
I was driving alone after a fight with my partner.
Describe how you were feeling?
I was feeling angry, upset, and bored.
What did you say to yourself?
I told myself that if I went gambling (and lost) I would just end up feeling
worse. I also told myself that there were plenty of other things I could do to
calm down.
What did you do instead?
I drove to a friend’s house to talk things over and watch TV.
Did your coping work?
Yes, my coping worked.
How you coped with urges:
E X A M P L E 1 :
Where were you and with whom?
Describe how you were feeling:
becoming a winner
What did you say to yourself?
What did you do instead?
Did your coping work?
E X A M P L E 2 :
Where were you and with whom?
Describe how you were feeling:
26
reaching your goal
What did you say to yourself?
What did you do instead?
Did your coping work?
E X A M P L E 3 :
Where were you and with whom?
Describe how you were feeling:
27
becoming a winner
What did you say to yourself?
Did your coping work?
List Down Your Best Ways Of Coping
28
29
reaching your goal
Staying away from gambling
Very often, many of your social contacts and activities involve gambling. It
is important for you to choose other activities instead. Gambling cannot
continue to be part of your social or relaxing activities. At least some of
your friends must be non-gamblers.
Make a list of other activities or hobbies that you enjoy that can fill your time.
These can be activities that you used to enjoy but have given up or new
activities that you have always wanted to learn or try.
Limiting your access to money
Most people find that if they have cash in their pocket they are more likely
to gamble . Many people who successfully stop gambling say that limiting their
cash flow is a must.
30
becoming a winner
Strategies to control your access to money
Some of these measures are more extreme and difficult to agree to. You
may want to try them right away, or you may choose the less extreme ones
first. If the less extreme measures do not work, you can always add the
more extreme measures to your strategy.
❑ Cancel your credit cards or give them to a family member for safekeeping.
❑ Cancel your ATM card.
❑ Make sure cheques are automatically deposited in your bank account.
❑ Have your salary collected by a family member.
❑ Create fixed deposits (that can’t be touched).
❑ Keep a record of all money spent and earned (budgeting).
❑ Take out only the cash needed for the day’s expenses.
❑ Limit the amount of money you can withdraw in a week
(by making arrangements with your bank).
❑ Tell family and friends NOT to lend you money.
❑ Seek financial counselling if necessary to be help deal with debts.
Do NOT borrow from family or friends. Deal with your financial
difficulties.
❑ Avoid jobs where you must handle cash.
❑ Leave your cash at home when you go out.
❑ Plan for situations where you receive money unexpectedly, such as a gift or
lump sum of cash.
❑ Arrange for a co-signer on all cheques that you write.
❑ Set up your bank account so that you must have two signatures to
withdraw cash.
❑ Give your monthly bill money to a family member or friend to handle
for safekeeping until it is needed.
People who are best at preventing relapses know how to protect themselves
from having access to money. They have a budget in place and seek credit
counselling if necessary. They understand their own ways of managing
money and how it affects their lifestyle. Finally, they understand how much
gambling costs them.
31
reaching your goal
Facing large debts
You are determined to manage your gambling problem but you may be facing a
huge gambling debt. It may take many years to pay off the debt and you may
feel depressed as you try to gain control over your gambling. Such problems
may distract you from working on your recovery from problem gambling.
You need support. If you don’t seek support, risky situations such as
committing crime to repay the debt, going to loansharks or turning to gambling
to ‘fix’ the problem may occur and your financial situation will worsen.
Financial problems can negatively affect you and your family’s emotional
health. Those effects may be worse if your family does not know the full
extent of the problem.
Consider seeking out a credit or financial counsellor to discuss ways to cope
with and manage gambling-related debts. Look for the listing of supports and
services at the end of this booklet. Then you can focus on your own recovery
from problem gambling.
Telling others of your plan
It is very helpful to tell those around you about your goal to stop gambling.
Gaining support will help you share the burden.
Make a list of people whom you will tell (or have already told) about your
plan and who will support you:
Go back to page 16 to review your goal.
Reaching your goal: Implementation of strategies
Identifying irrational and rational thoughts:
Irrational thought: “I just need to go and borrow $500 for gambling. If I win, all my problems are solved.” Rational thought: “ I need to be realistic. Gambling cannot solve my problems. ”
Taking up non-gambling related hobbies:
Hang out with friends who are not gamblers:
“ I make sure I attend support group sessions regularly.I also found new hobbies not related to gambling to occupy my spare time.”
“I think mixing with the right crowd is very important.I use others in my support group as a reminder that I can never go back to my old ways.”
‘Sum’
‘Mike’
‘Boon’
“The safest way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.”― American Cartoonist, Kin Hubbard
“One day you will wake up and there won’t be any more time to do the things you’ve always wanted. Do it now.”
― Brazilian novelist, Paulo Coelho
“Surround yourself with only people who are going to lift you higher.”― American media proprietor, Oprah Winfrey
Identify motivations and triggers:
“I gave my salary to my wife after deducting the amount needed for my daily expenses.”
“At that time, as a taxi driver, the flexible working hours and convenience of a vehicle made it easier for me to go horse betting and casino. Now, upon advice from a counsellor, I quit driving taxi and went back to being a food stall holder.”
Prevent yourselves from having easy access to money:
“Lots of people know what to do, but few people actually do what they know. Knowing is not enough! You must take action.”
― American life coach, Anthony Robbins
“Know what you want to do, hold the thought firmly, and do every day what should be done, and every sunset will see you that much nearer to your goal.”
― American writer, Elbert Hubbard
‘Chuan’
‘Guan’
becoming a winner
D. Maintaining your goal
Planning ahead
Go back and review the reasons why you gamble that you identified on page
11. For each one, ask yourself:
- Have you developed a strategy to deal with it?
- Identity any resources you may have (or need) to help you
- Rate your confidence (from 0-10) that you will resist gambling for this
reason
If any of the ratings are less than 10, review Section C: Reaching your Goal to
identify additional or alternative strategies to increase your confidence.
REASON STRATEGY RATING OF CONFIDENCE
E X A M P L E:
Boredom I will choose a hobby or an 10
activity from my list to engage
in when I feel bored
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maintaining your goal
Slipping and relapse
You need to expect that problems will come back from time to time. If you do
slip, remember that you have not failed and remind yourself of past
achievements.
You can often predict when problem gambling will reappear. You are more
likely to lose control when you have bad times in other parts of your life. You
can learn from your slips by recognizing your triggers and risky
situations. Look at what happened and see if you can spot ways of stopping it
next time. Re-read this manual and add your additional ideas. Learn from your
mistakes, see what works, and brainstorm what could work in the future.
DESCRIPTION OF INCIDENT WHAT YOU CAN DO TO PREVENT IT
(TRIGGERS) FROM HAPPENING AGAIN
E X A M P L E
· Went for lunch with co-workers · Use self-talk.
after a bad morning at work. · Bring only enough money for lunch.
· Felt frustrated and irritable. · Phone a friend to help me resist the urge.
· Spotted a jackpot machine in the club.
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becoming a winner
Dealing with other life problems
Problem gambling may or may not be related to other life problems such as
emotional, relationship, or social problems. Many gamblers report other
addictive problems such as the abuse of alcohol or other drugs. Certainly
these kinds of problems, whether related to gambling or not, can make it
difficult to overcome a serious problem. Problem gamblers may realize in
recovery that their gambling was hiding or overshadowing other problems.
Now that recovery is underway, you may be willing to take a closer look at
these problems and work on them.
List any problems in other life areas that you need to tackle:
Congratulations! You have completed this manual! You have taken an
important step in accepting responsibility for your gambling problem.
Change is a complex process so be patient with yourself. Give yourself credit for
every accomplishment you made in this journey!
34
I was a serious gambler – horse betting, lottery, online betting and playingjackpot in casino, resulting in heavy debt. I had to sell my four-room flat inorder to clear all my debts. To prevent me from gambling, my familymembers banned me from the casinos and placed me on the legalmoneylenders’ blacklist so that I could not borrow. They registered mewith a gambling rehabilitation centre and I went through all the classesand activities until my debts were cleared. I continued to go to the centrefor a few years as it became a habit and I also enjoyed the fellowship.
I stopped attending the centre after my new job required me to work moreovertime. I began to receive promotional messages from moneylenders. Totest whether I was removed from the moneylenders’ backlist, I called upone of them and the loan was approved. I spent the money on food andentertainment. One thing led to another, I began to bet online againthinking I would have better luck.
The cycle repeated with more lending, moregambling and more debts. I knew I could nothandle the situation anymore. Not wanting toupset and frustrate my family, I returned voluntarilyto the gambling rehabilitation centre. I am nowservicing my loans all over again, slowly andpainfully. However, I am more aware of my weaknessnow and know I cannot fight the addiction alone.
Maintaining your goal: Prevent Relapses
“I have missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I have lost almost 300 games. On 26 occasions I have been entrusted to take the game winning shot, and I missed. I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”
― American retired basketball player, Michael Jordan
‘Ryan’
“Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow. “
- American author, Mary Anne Radmacher
Source: Pinterest
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becoming a winner
E. Appendix
Need more help?
If you feel you need more help or support, or if you have tried the
techniques in this booklet and haven’t been successful, then other
resources are available.
Problem Gambling Issues
Adullam Life Counselling
Contact
Address
: 6659 7844 (Available Mon - Fri 10am - 6pm)
: 151 Chin Swee Road #08-04 Manhattan House
Singapore 169876
Website : http://adullam.org.sg/
Email : [email protected]
Arise2care Community Services Ltd
Contact : 6909 0628
Address : No.5 Harper Road
Unit 02-01/A
Singapore 369673
Website : http://www.arise2care.sg
Email : [email protected]
Blessed Grace Social Services Limited
Contact : 8428 6377
Address : 16 Arumugam Road
#04-02B LTC Building D
Singapore 409961
Website : http://www.bgss.org.sg/
Email : [email protected]
Changi General Hospital (The Psychological Medicine Centre)
Contact : 6850 3333 (consultation is strictly by appointment only)
Address : 2 Simei Street 3
Singapore 529889
Website : http://www.cgh.com.sg
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becoming a winner
Lakeside Family Services
Contact : 6265 6522
Address : 21 Yung Ho Road
#03-01 The Agape
Singapore 618593
Website : http://www.lakeside.org.sg/ Email : [email protected]
National Addictions Management Service (NAMS)
All Addictions helpline : 6-RECOVER (6-7326837)
Appointment : 6389 2200
Address : Buangkok Green Medical Park
10 Buangkok View
Singapore 539747
Website : www.nams.sg
Appointment : [email protected]
General enquiries : [email protected]
One Hope Centre
Contact : 6547 1011
Address : 8 New Industrial Road
#04-04B LHK3 Building
Singapore 536200
Website : www.onehopecentre.org
Email : [email protected]
Psychealth Practice (under Healthway Medical Group)
Contact : 6252 6266
Address : 176 Orchard Road
#06-01
The CentrePoint
Singapore 238843
Website : http://www.psychealth.sg/
Email : [email protected]
The Resilienz Clinic Contact : 6397 7300
Address : 10 Sinaran Drive
#10-03
Novena Medical Center
Singapore 307506
Website : http://www.resilienz.com.sg/services/resilienz-clinic
Email : [email protected]
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becoming a winner
Thye Hua Kwan (THK) Centre for Family Harmony @ Circuit
Contact : 6747 7514
Address : 37 Circuit Road
#02-455
Singapore 370037
Website : http://www.thkmc.org.sg/
Email : [email protected]
The National Council on Problem Gambling (NCPG)
Contact : 1800-6-668-668 (8am – 11pm)
Address : 510 Thomson Road
#05-01 SLF Building
Singapore 298135
Website : www.ncpg.org.sg
Email : [email protected]
The Silver Lining Community Services Ltd
Contact : 6749 0400
Address : 11 Playfair Road
Singapore 367986
Website : http://www.silverlining.com.sg
Email : [email protected]
WE CARE Community Services
Contact : 6547 5459
Address : 11 Jalan Ubi, Block 5
#01-41 Kembagan-Chai Chee, Community Hub
Singapore 409074
Website : http://www.wecare.org.sg/
Email : [email protected] / [email protected]
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becoming a winner
Financial Issues:
Credit Bureau (Singapore) Pte Ltd
Contact : 6565 6363
Address : 2 Shenton Way
#20-02 SGX Centre 1
Singapore 068804
Website : http://www.creditbureau.com.sg/
Email : [email protected]
Credit Counselling Singapore
Contact : 6225 5227
Address : 210 Middle Road
#05-04 Singapore Pools Building
Singapore 188994
Website : http://www.ccs.org.sg/
Email : [email protected]
DP SME Commercial Credit Bureau / DP Credit Bureau Pte Ltd
Contact : 6320 1900
Address : 10 Kallang Avenue
#14-18 Aperia Tower 2
Singapore 339510
Website : http://www.dpgroup.com.sg/AboutDP/CommercialSMECredit.aspx /
http://www.dpcreditbureau.com.sg
Email : [email protected] / [email protected]
Project X Ah Long
Contact : 1800-924-5664
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becoming a winner
Legal Issues:
Association of Women for Action and Research1
Contact
Address
: 1800 777 5555 (Mon-Fri: 3pm-9.30pm): 5 Dover Crescent
#01-22
Singapore 130005
Website : http://www.aware.org.sg/
Email : [email protected]
Community Justice Centre
Contact : 6557 4100
Address : 1 Havelock Square
Level 1 State Courts Complex
Singapore 059724
Website : www.cjc.org.sg
Email : [email protected]
Legal Aid Bureau Contact : 1800 2255 529
Address : 45 Maxwell Road
#07-11 The URA Centre (East Wing)
Singapore 069118
Website : https://www.mlaw.gov.sg/content/lab/en.html
Email : [email protected]
Singapore Association of Women Lawyers
Address : 96 Waterloo Street
#02-07 SCWO Centre
Singapore 187967
Website : http://www.sawl.org.sg/
Email : [email protected]
The Community Legal Clinic administered by Pro Bono Services Office Contact : 6536 0650
Website : http://probono.lawsociety.org.sg/Pages/Community-Legal-Clinic.aspx
Email : [email protected]
Please also check with your neighbourhood Community Clubs. Some Community
Clubs conduct regular legal clinics.
1 Women’s only service
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becoming a winner
Other Community Resources:
Family Justice Courts
Contact : 6435 5110
Address : 3 Havelock Square
Singapore 059725
Website : http://www.familyjusticecourts.gov.sg/
Email : [email protected]
Family Service Centres
Family Service Centres (“FSCs”) are key community-based focal points and social
service providers for families in need. The Ministry of Family and Social
Development’s website provides a complete listing of FSCs in Singapore.
Website:
http://app.msf.gov.sg/Policies/StrongandStableFamilies/SupportingFamilies/FamilyS
erviceCentres.aspx
Social Service Offices
Social Service Offices (“SSOs”) help deliver financial assistance through schemes
under the ComCare Fund. The Ministry of Family and Social Development’s
website provides a complete listing of SSOs in Singapore.
Website:
http://app.msf.gov.sg/dfcs/sso/default.aspx
The Samaritans of Singapore (SOS)
24-hour Hotline (manned by trained volunteers): 1800-221-4444
Address : Block 10 Cantonment Close
#01-01
Singapore 080010
Website : sos.org.sg / https://www.sos.org.sg/contact-us/enquiries (enquiries)
/ https://www.sos.org.sg/contact-us/feedback (feedback)
Email : [email protected]
Appendix: Don’t be afraid to seek help
I ended in debts because of mismanagement of expenses.My salary was unable to cover my expenses. I receivednumerous calls and promotional messages from licensedmoneylenders. To meet my expenses, I borrowedfrom one agency. Unable to pay back the loan, I borrowedfrom another two agencies to cover the first loan. I also started to bet heavilyon lottery hoping to clear all my debts at one go if I strike the first prize. Soon, Ifound that I owed $40,000 of debts to more than 15 moneylenders.
Seeing that I was unable to pay, one of the moneylenders recommended meto visit a centre providing help for problem gamblers. I went through theinitial interview and was assigned to a counsellor who patiently worked on mycase. As the monthly amount I could pay was low, he suggested me to paythree agencies for a start.
He also taught me how to handle the other agencies which I could not affordto pay at that moment. He helped me to negotiate a monthly instalment withthe three agencies. Meanwhile, I was enrolled in a gambling rehabilitationprogramme. The class facilitator and her helpers counselled us on ouremotional and relational issues.
Knowing I was in debt due to my mismanagement of expenses, she sat downwith me to go through my expenses. She showed me where I could cut downexpenses so that I would make ends meet. I began to realize that there wereunnecessary expenses – lottery, drinking and smoking. I was able to stopdrinking immediately. However, it was difficult to quit smoking. We worked outa plan to cut down the number of cigarettes per day. I also stopped buyinglottery as I know a better way to pay off my debts even though it may take along time.
‘Tan’
The Ministry of Family and Social Developmentwould like to thank the following organisations:
Blessed Grace Social ServicesThe Silver Lining Community Services Ltd
WE CARE Community Servicesfor their kind support.