The

Bath BurpFeb 2012 MUSIC * POETRY * ART Issue 9

Free Valentine’s Card

inside!

THE LOVE ISSUE

Editorial

The teacher talked, the children listened

and most of all the young Harris listened.

“Nelson, leader of the Royal Navy, one of

England’s most inspiring personalities,

died 1805. Winston Churchill, Prime Minister

of England, led British troops and Britain to

victory, died 1965. Charles Dickens, writer

of some of the greatest novels of all time,

defender of the poor and chronicler of the

age. Died 1870”.

And later that day, young Harris was quizzed,

“what would you like to be when you’re

older”, the answer most obvious was, “dead

Miss”.

David Selby

Wind pisser

Special thanks to Bloomfield Computing & Studios Ltd

for burning this month’s CD.

Front cover image by the wonderful Bob Shaw:

mattbobshaw.deviantart.com/gallery. Visit him,

he’d visit you.

ON THIS MONTH’S CD

1. My Island, by The Daturas. This is a

seriously catchy track. Saw them down at

Moles recently. Great gig.

www.facebook.com/TheDaturas

2. In The Land Of Milk And Honey, by Dakhla.

Did a fantastic set at The Bell.

dakhla.bandcamp.com

3. In Dependence (ft. Tom Burton and Aaron

Scott) by Laura Doggett.

soundcloud.com/laura-doggett

4. Everything Passes By, by The Low Flames.

Written by Ollie Smith and Adam Smith.(We met

the lovely Ollie at a songwriting session in

Box in Decemeber).

5. Too Late, by Hannah Collins, from her

album Different Light.

Hannahcollinsmusic.com

6. All The Colours Of The Painbow, by David

Beige. dexterselboy.yolasite.com/david-

beige.php

If you would like to submit a poem, song or story please

send an email to: music@thebathburp.co.uk We are happy

to come and record gigs in Bath too.

www.thebathburp.co.uk

Trina Warmanwww.saatchionline.com/trina

Art Reborn

In the epic financial

downfall

of late 2012

in an act

to conserve resources

the Terrible decision was

made

for the axing of

the BBC’s most relevant

and demographically

representative show

Eastenders.

Tears cascaded into streams

into rivers

into an ocean of regret

and many financiers were

driven

to take their own lives.

I,

in my infinite servitude to

mankind

took the decision to

(completely of charity)

fill the artistic void

felt by the masses.

Every night at 8pm

for one full hour

and for countless hours in

omnibus on Sundays

live

infront of millions of

viewers

would stand completely

bereft of clothes

and punch myself in the

dick

while crying.

For many years this sated

the Entertainment needs

of the masses

until 2017

when Terry Lewis

and income tax inspector

from Halifax

broke into the studio

and screamed

“This Isn’t Art”

to which I replied

“Art Is Dead”

for which I received an

award

for Expression

from Russell Brand

at The Wella Shockwaves

Awards For Something.

dexterselboy

.blogspot.com

Phaedra Vahlos

Ben Please

A selection of lino prints

from the artwork for The

Bookshop Band’s first album.

thebookshopband.co.uk

vimeo.com/thebookshopband

twitter.com/thebookshopband

Tsukiji Fish Market

It is early morning - still

a smooth metro ride complete

eased into

an older part of the city

where the fish finish their way

Stall after sea-soaked stall

a tide of noise navigated

- the cutting of band saws

call and response - then

water sends scales and slime

to the flowing gutters

these ever-wet workers

washed up at the end of their day

The last few forgotten fish

gaping where they have been cut

so precisely

then - a bucket of fish heads

and its attendant flies

The low halls - black charactered banners

a kingdom of ice - reverence

It is the size of the fish that surprises

here gaping jaws

a trawl mouth that once scooped all

In the busy nearby street

customers quietly queue -

the sashimi restaurant minutes from the knife

eager for the fish carved with orishi hocho

A line of bright upright flags

flap overhead

the queue shuffles forward

The cold march wind

turns the coat collars up

wraps scarves close

The market fades back into grey

the noise has gone

little left of the bright blood

the scales of un-named fish

a single eye gleams on the floor

It is still early in the day

we walk back to the metro

where the train whispers in

to the station above the harbour.

Richard Selby

www.richardselby.co.uk

Jo Pearce

OK, so we’re thinking

about having a

page of adverts for

exhibitions, gigs

and unusual local

companies. Get in touch

if you’d like to list

something.

For example, go to see

Beth Porter & The

Availables at The

Lovelounge (@ The

Bell), Sunday 26th

Feb, 8pm.£4

www.bathburpdirect.co.uk

Dear _

_______________ (enter loved

ones name. This may also be

yourself).

Wishing you a

very lovely

Valentines Day

and what not.

I love you

Kiss

Kiss

Kiss

Noo

key sometime?

(please delete as app

ropriate)

(Space for your own mess

age here.

Say something sexy, a poem maybe? Or

perhaps draw a prett

y litt

le picture.

People like pictures.)

From

_________________ (generall

y

don’t enter your name here, or do).

cut along here

fold here

Att

ention

card

receiver

/

sender.

Depending on how succ

ess

ful Valentines

Day i

s f

or y

ou, y

ou m

ay a

lso b

e i

nterested

in s

ome o

f t

hese l

ovely s

ingles f

rom T

he

Bath Burp editorial team.

Dave Selby. Carpenter, poet,

songwriter and hub-of-the-

comm

unity barman.

Poo

r, but ironicall

y also the

highest earner of the bunch.

Ben Please. BAFTA award

winn

ing, Cambridge top

graduate, all

singing (no

dancing). Curr

ently lives

with his mum.

Lewis. He has already built a

website for you.

Heidi Lee

-Sperr

ing. This

kitt

en is taken. Get your

mitt

ens off

! She bites!

Bob Shaw. This boy is taken

too

! Loo

ks like it’s one of the

others then. Oh well

.

If you dont get any valentines

cards, or you’d like an extra one,

please cut out where indicated,

fold along the dott

ed line and

place on your mantlepiece.

Or why not give this card to a

loved one. Just fill

in their name

in the space provided over page.

Either way, if you do, probably

best scribb

le out these words so

no one knows where you got the

card from.

www.thebathburp.co.uk

cut along here

fold here

The B

ath B

urp’s

Acm

e DIY

Valen

tine C

ard Kit

(free with

this m

onth

s issue)