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CONTENTS DECEMBER | JANUARY 2014LIVING A LIFE OF PASSION AND PURPOSE

Wisdom &Self-Growth

On the Cover

Jennifer LoudenJennifer Louden is the best-selling author of The Life Organizer: A Woman’s Guide to a Mindful Year, The Woman’s Comfort Book and many others. Jennifer is a personal coach and cultural visionary, harnessing her extraordinary ability to recognize women’s comfort as both a fundamental need and an innate desire.

JEN’S COVER PHOTO:Darrah Parker Photographyhttp://www.darrahparker.com/

18 HOW TO STOP THE CYCLE OF OVER-PROVIDING

by Jennifer Louden Many of us are

guilty of over-providing to the benefit of others

at the cost to ourselves. Over-providing is a less than truthful existence and keeps you from giving birth to your truest life. It can be very difficult to recognize when you are over-providing. Here are some of the signs to watch for and to help you wake up to when it might be happening.

22 LIVING WITH PASSION AND PURPOSE

by Dr. Jennifer Howard True passion flows

from our very deepest source, our highest level of existence, our essence. It’s a calling, an ache inside that’s summoning

you to be the person you were meant to be, so you can make the contribution to this world only you can make. It’s this passion that’s moving you closer to your “purpose.” When rooted in your purpose, you can more easily tap into your true passion.

26 THE CREATIVE BEING CREED

by Shiloh Sophia McCloud Shiloh Sophia McCloud

is a visionary artist and teacher. She has dedicated the past twenty years of her to life art as a path of healing through painting, writing and teaching intentional creativity. At the core of her work is a belief that the right to self express is one of the most basic human rights – having access to what we think, feel, know, believe and want to create in our lives. Enjoy Shiloh’s beautiful Creative Being Creed.

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CONTENTS “Your purpose in life is to find your purpose and give your whole heart and soul to it.”BUDDHA

28 LIVING THE BIG STUFF: STEPPING INTO THE NEXT CHAPTER

by Kristine Carlson As women we find

ourselves in a stage of reinvention at different

times in our lives for different reasons. This may mean you have

to release the past and move into the unknown territory of self-discovery to receive a new dream. Whatever brings you to this place in your life of crossroads; you are one step closer to realizing your next great chapter of life and embracing change as you “live the big stuff!”

32 SIMPLY EMPOWERED... HOW WOULD A WOMAN REACT?

by Crystal Andrus The next time you find

yourself in a situation where the old wounds want to pop up and remind you of feeling unworthy or unwanted, remind yourself that you’re a woman now! You are teaching people how to treat you by the way you treat yourself! Crystal shares the powerful wisdom behind the acronym she created using the word WOMAN. Use it to remind you of how you want to respond in challenging times: Like a woman would!

36 THE RICHNESS OF LIVING A PURPOSEFUL LIFE by Maryellen De Vine

Life Coach, Angel Therapy Practitioner® and Founder of Angelic Journeys Maryellen De Vine shares five ways you can get started opening to the magic and richness of your own Spirit-filled, purposeful life.

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CONTENTS “When you lost sight of your path, listen for the destination in your heart.”KATSURA HOSHINO

39 RAISING YOUR GODDESS CONSCIOUSNESS by M. J. AbadieWhen we listen and pay attention to the still small voice, we hear the voice of the Goddess. The directions we need most often come from within, yet they can be mirrored by what is happening without. The question is: How can we sort through our multiplicity of feelings, sensations, intuitions, thoughts, and reactions to get to the core of the matter? The answer is through reflection. Consciousness thrives in the silence of reflection.

Health &Wellness

42 LIVING THE GODDESS LIFESTYLE: I DID IT MY WAY!

by Lisa Marie Rosati Most likely you think

you’ve heard it all when it comes to ‘discovering and living your purpose’ and how important it is to do so. Lisa Marie shares her maverick thought about “purpose”: You’re already living your purpose… and your purpose will most likely change and evolve many times over the course of your lifetime! Discover how you have been living on purpose all along and take some time to dive deeper with these introspective journaling questions .

46 PRACTICE YOGA WITH INTENTION:

A GUIDE TO CHOOSING THE RIGHT STYLE FOR THE NEW YEAR

by Meagan McCrary Whether you want to

become lithe and toned,

address specific health issues, gain more clarity, develop a sense of peace, discover your life’s purpose or whatever it is — choosing a yoga style that supports your intention for the New Year is essential for staying on course. Here is an overview of the yoga style best suited for your intention. Whether it’s becoming svelte with Ashtanga-vinyasa yoga or developing more self-acceptance and compassion with Kripalu yoga there’s a yoga style for you.

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49 IS IT PERIMENOPAUSE? by Mary E. Pritchard, Ph. D.

We all know to look for hot flashes and night sweats as early signs of menopause. But did you know that the earliest signs of perimenopause are often psychological or spiritual in nature? Women may suffer for years with early signs of hormonal imbalance and not

even know it. Learn more about these important signs and what they mean.

CONTENTS “You were put on this earth to achieve your greatest self, to live out your purpose, and to do it fearlessly.”STEVE MARABOLI

52 THE WISE WOMAN WAY: LIVING A LIFE OF PURPOSE

by Susun Weed The purpose of our

lives differs from the goals of our lives. We strive to achieve goals; purpose carries us. We must think up goals; purpose is inherent and without thought. We each have different goals, and different ways of achieving the same goals, but we all have the same purpose: To share love and create joy.

Relationships

56 8 KEYS TO CREATING A LOVING, JOYFUL RELATIONSHIP

by Margaret Paul, Ph.D. Do you believe that if

you have to work on a relationship, it’s not the right relationship for you? It’s not true. However, “working on a relationship,” doesn’t mean that it has to be hard. It primarily means that you continually learn and grow toward being an ever-more-loving person. While we don’t need to be in a relationship to continue to evolve toward being more loving, relationships trigger all that is unhealed within us, thereby offering us wonderful opportunities for healing and growth. Here are eight keys that are essential in creating a joyful, loving relationship.

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CONTENTS “Built into you is an internal guidance system that shows you the way home. All you need to do is heed the voice.”NEALE DONALD WALSCH

60 5 SECRETS OF A HEALTHY MARRIAGE

by Shann Vander Leek In The Five Secrets of

a Healthy Marriage, Transformation Goddess, Shann Vander Leek shares her formula for enjoying a healthy, fun and long-lasting partnership. Married to her beloved Thomas for 21 years, Shann is walking her talk and enjoying the blessings of a great relationship.

63 COLORSCOPE by Elizabeth Harper

Colorscope is a unique system designed to stimulate your intuitive skills. By choosing the color you are most drawn to you actively access the wisdom of your subconscious and the voice of your soul.

Career | Business

66 INTERVIEW WITH THE MARKETING GODDESS: ELIZABETH PURVIS

by Linda Joy In this empowering

interview, Elizabeth Purvis shares some great tips on creating a thriving business and why she is so passionate about teaching and empowering women how to magnetize their desires and create their lives and businesses exactly as they wish to live it. Elizabeth is recognized as a leader in the emerging teaching of feminine energy in business and is a mentor to thousands of conscious women entrepreneurs around the world.

69 DOING BUSINESS LIKE A GODDESS: GRATITUDE FIRST! by Elizabeth Purvis

In this continuing series, Elizabeth shares the 4th key concept for doing

business like a Goddess: Gratitude First as well as 10 ways to practice gratitude. When you make the commitment to LIVE in gratitude, it will create a space for you to experience the ultimate blessing: to change your life while transforming the lives of others through your business.

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Creative & Brand Direction || RACHEL DUNHAM | www.HummingbirdCreativeConcepts.com

Editorial Layout || MANDY GATES | www.GruveDesign.com

Graphic Designer || MANDY GATES | www.GruveDesign.com

COO || KIM TURCOTTE | www.SoulPurposeBusinessSolutions.com

MAILING ADDRESS || P.O. BOX 1149 | LAKEVILLE, MA 02347 | 508.265.7929

ADVERTISING || Email Linda@aspiremag.net

MISSION TO INSPIRE INFO <CLICK HERE>

LINDA JOY || Publisher & Editor-In-Chief | Linda@aspiremag.net

CONTENTS “Truth is not something outside to be discovered, it is something inside to be realized.”OSHO

74 INSPIRED TO WRITE? THE BOSS FROM HELL AND

OTHER GIFTS FROM THE UNIVERSE

by Lisa Tener National Book Coach Lisa

Tener shares how her path to living a life of passion and purpose revealed itself slowly. Lisa shares how clarity came in incremental steps, gentle promptings and small synchronicities and the lessons learned on her journey.

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KRISTINE CARLSONLiving the Big Stuff TMAn unyielding believer of Living the Big StuffTM and not sweating the small stuff in order to experience true happiness in life, as a bestselling author and inspirational speaker Kristine Carlson continues to expand on the phenomenal success of her late husband, Dr. Richard Carlson, beloved author of the Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff series. www.KristineCarlson.comwww.DontSweatMoms.com

LISA MARIE ROSATILiving the Goddess LifeStyleTM

Passionista Lisa Marie Rosati is an Inner Goddess Catalyst for women and the Creatrix of The Goddess Lifestyle Plan. Lisa mentors women on how become a Modern Day Goddess by consciously designing a luscious Goddess life, cultivating radiant health and creating a lucrative business using and directing their feminine fire.www.GoddessLifestylePlan.com

CRYSTAL ANDRUSSimply... Empowered!Crystal Andrus is a leader in the field of self-discovery and personal transformation. From a tough beginning—she has risen to become a best-selling Hay House author, international speaker, women’s health advocate, spokesperson for Haylo Health, and Founder of The SWAT Institute. Crystal’s message is one of resilience, strength and inner power. www.CrystalAndrus.comwww.SWATInstitute.com

ELIZABETH HARPERColorScope Elizabeth Harper is an internationally acclaimed teacher, intuitive, healer, and the author of the award winning book Wishing: How to Fulfill Your Hearts Desires. Elizabeth is on the faculty at the highly acclaimed Omega Institute in Rhineback, NY and is invited to speak around the world. www.SealedwithLove.com

ELIZABETH PURVISDoing Business Like a Goddess Elizabeth Purvis shows spirit-led, mission-driven women how to price, package and market their services so they create extraordinary income and impact. Known for blending heart-centered sales, Internet marketing, spiritual principles and Universal Law, Elizabeth delivers simple ways for her clients to double or triple revenues by creating multiple streams of income and enrolling ideal clients at higher fees. www.MarketingGoddess.com

LISA TENERInspired to Write?An award-winning authority on writing and publishing books, Lisa Tener guides you to joyfully express yourself in writing. She blogs for the Huffington Post, serves on the faculty of Harvard Medical School’s publishing course, and teaches her own Award Winning Book Writing Courses in person and by interactive teleseminar.www.LisaTener.com

SUSUN WEEDThe Wise Woman WaySusun Weed is an internationally renowned herbalist, author, and director of the Wise Woman Center in New York. She is a revered voice of the Wise Woman Tradition, where women’s bodies and women’s emotions are valued. Susun is a founding grandmother of the herbal renaissance and the originator of the concept of complementary medicine. www.SusunWeed.com

EXPERT COLUMNISTS

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FEATURED CONTRIBUTORS

YOUR WISDOM!WITH OUR READERS

Share CONTACT US TODAY TO LEARN ABOUT OURAWESOME CONTRIBUTOR OPPORTUNITIES!

MARYELLEN DE VINE MEAGAN MCCRARY MARY E. PRITCHARD, PH. D., HHC

JENNIFER LOUDEN SHILOH SOPHIA MCCLOUDDR. JENNIFER HOWARD

SHANN VANDER LEEKMARGARET PAUL, PH. D.

JEN LOUDEN PHOTO CREDIT:Darrah Parker Photography

http://www.darrahparker.com/

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LETTER FROM THEEDITOR

”Once a woman becomes aware of forces that influence her, she gains the power that knowledge provides.””

Welcome to the December2013/January2014 “Living a Life of Passion and Purpose” issue!

I’ve come to believe that each and every one of us yearn to discover the purpose of our lives and to be able to passionately pursue it. My personal definition of a ‘life of purpose’ is about living a life of meaning, joy and passion that aligns our goals with our values and leads us to consciously create our lives from a place of meaning and intention.

Jennifer Louden, (cover) exemplifies a woman living her purpose. As the leading expert on the concept of “comfort” and self-care for women, Jennifer’s mission continues to transform as women’s roles and voices have evolved. From a well-read self-help author to a cultural leader and life guide, Jennifer continues to live her truth inspiring women to develop their own recipe for emotional, physical, spiritual and work-life balance.

You’ll discover nuggets of wisdom, hope and inspiration throughout the pages of this issue of Aspire Magazine. From Dr. Margaret Paul’s Living a Life of Passion and Purpose to Is it Perimenopause? by Mary E. Pritchard, Ph.D., HHC, this issue is filled with feminine wisdom to support you on your journey of self-empowerment, self-love and inspired living.

Invitation to Visionary business women, Coaches and Authors: If you are here to serve, inspire and empower women through your heart-centered business, I invite you to learn more about joining me and some of my visionary gal pals for THE spirit-led, heart-centered collaborative list-building project of the year! LEARN MORE

LINDA JOYPublisher & Editor-In-Chief | Linda@aspiremag.net

Connect with me!

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FROM MY BOOKSHELF

Here’s What I’m Reading Right Now...The Life Organizer: A Woman’s Guide to a Mindful YearBy Jennifer LoudenThis powerful book is all about organizing from the ‘inside out’! Jennifer Louden’s Life Organizer is a datebook for the soul that helps women create the life they want.

JEAN SHINODA BOLEN

Discerning the Difference Between

Intuition and Impulse

UPCOMING EVENTS Live & Virtual

WISDOM &SELF-GROWTH

INSPIRED LIVING SECRETS: SEASON 3 || DETAILS! 24 Visionary Women – Thousands in Free Gifts – Free Access

YOUR FIRST 3 CLIENTS FREE TRAINING CALL || DETAILS!Linda Joy Interviews Marketing Goddess Elizabeth Purvis

BY CARI MURPHY

“The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, and to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.”Ralph WaldoEmerson

ReadOnline!

So, how do we know if the inner voice we’re listening to is

actually our intuition and not something else, like a sudden

impulse? It is a fascinating and important question to address

on our journey through life. I personally feel that when we pay

attention to that still small intuitive voice that attempts to guide

us from moment to moment, we remain on our soul’s path

with conscious intent and deliberate action. The challenge we

face lies in determining what voice we’re listening to! It can

be challenging to determine

whether we’re receiving

guidance or advice from our

intuition/higher self or just the impulsive tendency that stems from our own logic

or ego. It can be difficult to discern the difference if we know what signs to look for.

Read the full article online.

CHECK OUT MOREONLINE!

AspireMag.net

I define over-providing as giving more than is personally sustainable for you and often giving for the wrong reasons. Accurate but kind of bland. A better definition is from my friend Jeanie, “Over-providing? That’s when you’re pouring everything into growing everybody else while withering yourself.”

Withering yourself. Yes that’s what you do when, instead of bringing the requested two sides to the family holiday dinner, you show up with five sides, a salad, two pies, gravy and a ham. Withering yourself is hosting a fund-raiser for your favorite cause, spending weeks hand-crafting the food, the decorations and all the details (even though there are other volunteers), and ending up in bed for two weeks with pneumonia. Withering yourself is inviting your elderly mom to move in with you, even though she has a support system and enough money for good care, and find yourself gaining weight, neglecting your creative passions, and cultivating a big ole’ grudge.

OVER-PROVIDINGBY JENNIFER LOUDEN

How to Stop the Cycle of

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 201418

Also, over-providing can be very difficult to recognize. Your family of origin, your religious background, even where you work, can give you strong messages about how much to give. Most of us believe, at least a little, that we are worthwhile for what we do, not who we are. Because it’s tricky to know when you are over-providing, it’s good to know some of the signs to help you wake up to when it might be happening.

SIGNS LIKE:

• A hollow feeling of never getting enough done

• Overly focused on what others think of you

• A jittery compulsion to fix people’s pain, to do something to make it better

• Feeling lonely even when you have friends and family around

• Doubting other’s intentions - “They only love me because I do so much for them”

• Resentment – everybody else gets what they want but you

• Frustrated and paralyzed, feeling like you go around and around in a circle on your own dreams and desires

• Hearing yourself say things like “When I finish ____ then I will” and “I just had to do ____ for _____ who else would?” and “If I don’t do ______ I will be a big failure, get fired and end up homeless and…”

Obviously, over-providing is not in your best interests and yet we all do it, at least some of the time. Why oh why?

HERE ARE A FEW OF OUR COMPELLING REASONS:

• You were raised in a culture that still proclaims good women give endlessly and good men provide.

• Your biology –humans are hard-wired to belong. Over-providing keeps you in the tribe.

• You’re empathetic. You care. You want to help. How to determine how much is enough?

• You may believe what you want to give isn’t worthwhile enough (whether that’s your ideas or your presence or your love) so you gush like a broken fire hydrant lots of other things – money, meals, advice, time - to make up for what you lack.

• You might forget you’re a human with human limits of time and energy, easy to do in these uber speedy times.

• Perhaps, in the past, over-providing kept you safe from harm.

• You haven’t learned (yet) to trust your self, to trust your body and heart when it says, “Enough.”

WISDOM

& SELF-GROWTH

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specific things you did or didn’t do (I tell myself “Hey, good on you for not having any gluten at the party!”). Imagine this praise in the form of hummingbirds streaming into the back of your heart.

• Navigate by desire.

Make a practice of asking, “What do I want?” or “What would I really love to do here?” before say yes to something. Learning to know what you want, even if you can’t have it, is a life changing practice and one I teach in more depth in my book, The Life Organizer.

• Deputize a few beloveds to check in with before you say yes to something else.

My husband Bob and my Brain Trust (my mastermind group) must hear from me before I commit to a project or a teaching gig. I might still say yes even if they counsel no but at least I stopped long enough to make my case. Hearing yourself try to talk yourself into something can be pretty enlightening.

• Test reality

Is it true if you say no to your sister when she asks you to work for free in her store she’ll never speak to you again? Is it true that if you stop trading your coaching services for inferior admin help you will be overwhelmed and die? Take one fear of the disaster and do something different – say no, ask for what you want, etc. Note in writing - what was the actual result?

• Get used to saying, “Let me get back to you.”

Now before we move onto the antidotes to over-providing, I’ll address the idea that over-providing at work is the only way to succeed. But what research actually shows is the people who have the highest impact link authentic regard for others’ interests –co-workers, customers, colleagues - while also taking care of their own interests. In other words, they don’t abandon their own desires, they tend both. Wharton professor Adam Grant, author Give & Take: A Revolutionary Approach to Success, calls this “otherish giving.” Yes, this applies to clients, customers, and especially, children.

Okay, hopefully I’ve convinced you, at least a little, that over-providing is not the best choice for your health, your career, or your sanity. Now what to do?

SAMPLE ONE OR TWO (NO MORE!) OF THESE SIMPLE BALANCING ANTIDOTES:

• Write down everything you do for others in a 24 hour period.

This is far harder than it seems. If you have a lot of resistance, you may be deeply identified with over-providing as in “This is what makes me me!” or you may be so exhausted by over-doing that you need a nap. Either way, notice why you refuse to do this.

• Start the day with five minutes of extravagant self-praise.

Read emails extolling your amazing virtues, recall compliments in vivid detail, shower gratitude on yourself for

www.AspireMAG.net | December / January 201420

spends two hours walking one-way to gather muddy water doesn’t get to choose how much she gives. And that isn’t an argument for you to be a martyr. Instead, become a force of love and balance in the world in hopes that one day all people can choose an emotionally and physically sustainable life.

It’s tempting to get your kicks from being everything to everybody. It can be hard to believe there is another way and, once you see your pattern, you also see how over-providing is a less than truthful existence. It keeps you from giving birth to your truest life. Seeing that, painful as it can be, will motivate you to listen and choose the middle way – a little me, a little them – more often.

Make a list of all the reasons you must do this. Then go down the list asking, “Is that true?”

• Deepen your practice of self-trust.

When faced with a decision or choice, ask yourself before you ask anyone else, “What do I think? What do I want?” We develop self-trust by checking in with ourselves (a key part of the Life Organizing practice from my book and app), taking action on our best guess, and then asking, “What do I know now?” We do not develop self-trust by saying, “Obviously, I can’t trust myself because I thought X was the right choice and it wasn’t.” That’s not self-trust, that’s being a psychic.

• Learn your over-providing triggers.

Exhaustion? Criticism? Being shamed? When you know your triggers, you may still over-provide but you’ll know why, and in time, that makes it easier to stop.

• Forget hard and fast rules.

Some situations call for over-giving for a period of time. When my dad was dying, it was important to over-provide for him. When I moved my mom into assisted living because of her Alzheimer’s, it was good to fuss over her for a couple of weeks. The guideline? Are you checking in with yourself? Are you choosing mindfully? If you want to give more, are you capable of doing so without hurting yourself?

• Yes, avoiding over-providing is a privileged problem.

The woman in sub-Saharan Africa who

WISDOM

& SELF-GROWTH

ReadOnline!

Jennifer Louden - The best-selling author of The Life Organizer: A Woman’s Guide to Mindful Year (out in paperback in December 2013), The Woman’s Comfort Book, The Couple’s Comfort Book, The Pregnant Woman’s Comfort Book, The Woman’s Retreat Book, and Comfort Secrets for Busy Women. She is both a personal coach and social commentator, who has taken the concept of “comfort” and self-care, and made these essential concepts irresistible and essential to women around the world. Jennifer is a cultural visionary, harnessing her extraordinary ability to recognize women’s comfort as both a fundamental need and an innate desire.

Purchase your copy of the paperback version of the The Life Organizer, and receive the Life Organizer Sanity Support Kit. Grab a copy today at JenniferLouden.com/lifeorganizer.

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