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WHAT IS OUR IDENTITY?One Congregation’s 20 Year Journey from Reactive ex-

Roman Catholics to American National Catholics

May 1, 2015

Fr. James Lehman, FCM

Chapter I-Koinonia

I was ordained a Permanent Deacon in 1987 for the Roman Catholic Church and began working at Immaculate Heart of Mary Cathedral as the Administrator. I was encouraged to do some outreach to the Gay and Lesbian community. This was around 1993 and the journey began. The group met and we chose the word Koinonia which is a transliterated form of the Greek word, κοινωνία, which means communion, joint participation. It identifies the idealized state of fellowship and unity that should exist within the Christian church, the Body of Christ. We gathered weekly for fellowship, prayer and the reading of the Sunday scriptures. Eventually the group said that they wanted more and wanted Eucharist. Around the same time I had a conversation with a friend of mine standing outside of the IHM Cathedral and asked why we could not have a church where all were welcome. She said we could and she would help me. I met with the Roman Catholic bishop and asked for a leave of absence as I was feeling more and more not at home in the Roman Catholic Church.

Chapter II-Peace Lutheran and Beginnings

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I began to search the web looking at Independent Catholic Churches and found one that seemed to fit. It was Anglican, which was a little different for me, but they were welcoming to all and had a distance learning program so that I could complete my classes here in Las Cruces. I began my studies and Koinonia continued to meet in our home. On October 31, 1995 we met around my dining room table and requested from Anglican Bishop Craig his permission to form a parish. We chose the name “Holy Family” as Jesus, Mary and Joseph were not a traditional family, as were not many of us. We began to look around for a place to meet and approached Pastor Steve Loy of Peace Lutheran ELCA. Our first service was in the Fall of 1995. My ordination to the Anglican priesthood took place April 13, 1996 in front of a packed church of family and friends. The next Sunday we had about 5 people in attendance.

We started with a Saturday evening service and then moved to Sunday evening. People in authority tried to shut us down saying we were confusing the people but we continued and the Lutherans gave us sanctuary. We continued to struggle for a number of years working to build community.

Chapter III-First Christian Chapel and Transition Time

In 2002, after becoming disenchanted with the direction of the Anglican jurisdiction and its lack of faith communities, we began to look for an ecclesial home that more fully manifested our vision of Church where “all are welcome” but this was not to be the end of our journey. We wrote new By-Laws, borrowing from our Bishop Peter Hickman, and while we were reclaiming our Catholic tradition,

we would later realize that not all, in what came to be known as the ECC, had the same common vision. About a year later the Ecumenical Catholic Communion (ECC) was formed and I was Incardinated into the ECC as a priest and connected to a new bishop. The ECC used the word Catholic in its name but this was not defined and in time this would become a problem. Some said it was like sailing a ship while building it or sailing a ship with no rudder. These issues would eventually become critical and would

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affect our local functioning.

Eventually we saw that to grow we needed to have a Sunday morning service as 90% of the people in this country go to church on Sunday. One of my friends from the Interfaith Council of New Mexico State University was Rabbi Jerry Cain and he told me of a place which I needed to look at. It was the chapel of First Christian Church. This was around 2003. We loved the friends we had made at Peace Lutheran but it was time to move. We met with the leadership of First Christian, Rev. Knotts and their Council, and shortly after moved into their chapel which seated about 40 people. Our previous space could hold about 175 and with only about 20 people in attendance we felt overwhelmed by the space. The new space was an intimate little chapel which we could set up as we wanted. It was lit by windows on the right side which opened to an atrium. Very soon we would appreciate the

windows as for the next couple of years we doubled in size every year. People would stand outside the windows looking in as we grew from 20, 40, to 80 people. With this move our growth exploded, and in 2005 we gained 13 families, then 15 the next year. In 2006 The Albuquerque Journal wrote an article on us and this brought us more people. During this time leadership questions and needs were minimal and often the community

gathered as a whole to make decisions, we functioned like Congregationalists, even though we had not made a conscious decision to do so, but we were living out the By-Laws which had been borrowed from our new bishop. The Council met and prayed about the problem of our growth. We had to either turn people away or look for a new space.

A committee was set up and we looked at store fronts and old churches but we were small and could not afford much. My old friend Rabbi Cain heard that we were looking for a larger space and said they were planning to move their synagogue to a new location and asked if we wanted to buy their old Synagogue. We were excited and went to the bank but we were turned down. This was a

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blow to us. This was in 2006 after being at First Christian only about 3 years. Sadly we informed Rabbi Cain that we could not get a mortgage. A few days later I had a phone call from him telling me that David Steinborn and Tom Levy, members of the Synagogue, had purchased the building and that they would be willing to sell the building to

us. They really wanted us to have the building as they knew that we would respect the 50 years of celebrations and traditions which had taken place in their building. We were able to raise about $53,000 in a few months. It was going to happen. On Feb. 7, 2007 we signed the papers (10 year interest free note with a balloon payment) and began the renovation of our new home.

Chapter IV-New Home (Temple Beth El) and Growing Pains

In 2007 we gained 36 new families, as we moved into our new home. Until that time we were a “church in a box,” setting up for liturgy each week in the rented space of the church. We needed more permanent housing and moving into a new space was a time of faith, trusting that we would continue to grow and that we could afford the mortgage. We did not know what Old Catholic or Ecumenical Catholic meant, and we simply felt like ex-Roman Catholics, but with a laity that had a strong voice. Indeed, the laity led the discussion and lived out their faith to buy the new facility. We had raised $53,000 in less than a year – and so the Spirit had spoken. New families came to us asking for baptism and marriage. They felt alienated from Rome but found a comfortable home with us.

The people who joined us were divorced and remarried, gay and lesbian, and the un-churched. The new building brought us wonderful opportunities for growth, but also chaos. When we started, I was a part time pastor and spiritual advisor and the founding families ran the church. Now we had to move to a pastor as executive with part time

office staff. I began to realize that I had to both educate and lead the community in a different way but was not sure how to change the direction we had been

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going. I began to explore information sent out by the Alban Institute and saw that the leadership structure had to change as the community grew. The information I read attested to the fact that this is often a difficult and painful process and it was.

In 2008 growing conflict identified itself over a truly trivial matter. Given the changes we were experiencing, conflict was inevitable and the specific issue in which that conflict was expressed was in many ways irrelevant. There were new leaders on the board and the old leaders believed that they were the founders and so had a permanent and special role in the running of the church. They were offended that they were only consulted but not given veto power. The old guard saw my actions and that of the new Council as authoritarianism, for they were “the voice of the laity.” Remember, that at the beginning we functioned as a “community of the whole.” Many said that the church “belonged to the laity” and “this was a lay led church,” but what did that mean and where did this attitude come from?

Moving into our new building meant that decisions had to be made more rapidly; it became apparent that our parish polity/organization was not fully functional. Up until this time I consulted with the President of the Council on all decisions that were to be made. This would require multiple phones calls trying to track the individual down for what was often a minor issue but we were

dealing with major issues as we had moved into a building which was 50 years old.

At this point I requested that I have a vote on the Parish Council, as I felt that my voice was not being heard. I had voice on the Council but could only vote to break a tie and so I was left with the feeling that my voice was less than equal to the others. In the

Roman Church, the Parish Council is just advisory and has no real say in the decisions being made. At Holy Family the pendulum has swung to the other side where the pastor had no say. I only had the power to speak my mind.

I thought that the Spirit speaks to us and that we best live out the traditions of the early church when all have a right to be heard, speaking from their roles and functions. Bishops are our teachers, wisdom leaders and the shepherds of the flock. They are to maintain the traditions of the Church Catholic, and the priests are extensions of this role at a local level. Some of my fellow pastors in the ECC

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did not even attend their Council meetings and were proud that the laity was in charge. Later I realized that this was not an anomaly but was a

characteristic of the Church of which we were part. This different understanding as to the ecclesiology of the church led to constant conflicts and was constantly being played out both nationally and locally.

Chapter V-New Council and By-Laws

In 2010, the Holy Family Parish Council leaders and I launched a committee and rewrote our By-Laws (replacing the one with which we had lived for about 6 years). We worked to have our new By-Laws more closely reflect our functioning. Through the years this has led to multiple revisions and some people left. We had to take care that we did not just react against the overly clerical experience that so many had in the Roman Catholic Church.

The Pastor became a leader of the church with primary authority over issues of theology, spirituality and liturgy. The pastor also functioned as administrator and a member of the Finance Committee and Parish Council. Policies were set up to protect the church in the areas of finance. All of these changes reflected the suggestions of the Alban Institute and with our size (100+ Families) the pastor functioned more as the

CEO. We developed a Finance Committee where there was a healthy dialogue with the laity having a strong presence. The Parish Council became a place where policies were set. These bodies displayed an essential dialogue where everyone had a voice.

The dialogue referred to above is the essence of liturgy. Liturgy is like an orchestra, where each instrument has a part and the whole orchestra is led by a conductor. Each part is important for beautiful music. If everyone in the orchestra tried to conduct, or played out of step with the rest of the instruments, the result would be loud noise.

I believed that the changes made to our local By-Laws more clearly reflected the vision of the church and its synodal structure, for the both the pastor and the laity had a voice. Each voice brings its own wisdom and life experience

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to the Council, discerning the will of the Spirit. Together we make a “joyful noise to the Lord.” Together we sing a hymn of beauty and peace.

The Christian life is centrally reflected in the laity. The laity is the focus of what it means to be Christian. The clergy are called from the laity—called by the voice of the Apostles in the name of Christ. The Church cannot be established without bishops and clergy; and the Church cannot be constituted without the laity. There is a dynamic dance of life and hope when both clergy and laity are strong and vitally engaged in the Church and its mission. This is celebrated in the dance of liturgy, and explained in our ecclesiology – working to create a Church where “all are welcome,” where all bishops, clergy and laity listen to the Spirit and dialogue with one another.

These last few years were a painful journey as some members left Holy Family Parish, feeling that there was something wrong and unchristian when a church had conflict. Many were of the opinion that conflict should not take place in a church, but inevitably it does. This was a time of sadness for me and other members of our church.

In our human frailty, we are all in need of redemption, and have to look at the shadow side of ourselves as well as that of the Church. It was sad when some members left the parish; and others said that they dropped out of the parish years before, and had not been part of the community for a long time. Cliques can develop in all organizations, especially in churches. Pastors often find it difficult to motivate their people to be creative – to assertively use their talents to build up the Church, while also challenging them to carefully listen to one another. No one has all the answers.

Chapter VI-American National Catholic Church

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We began to realize that we needed a church home which more closely reflected our understanding of our Catholic identity. Just as we had to make some tough decisions locally we had to do the same nationally and in 2014 found a new home in the American National Catholic Church. The ANCC is a contemporary expression of an ancient faith. It has a firm commitment to the Seven Sacraments, the Ancient Creeds, the trifold Orders of Deacon, Priest and Bishops, and it embraces the 2nd edition translation of the mass of Vatican II (ie.

The Lord be with you-And also with you) that is revered by so many in the Americas. The ANCC also strives to live up to the dream and vision of Pope John XXIII and the Second Vatican Council, building a more open church to all where all have a voice. We were finally home

Around the same time Fr. Louie Amezaga, whom I had known from the IHM Cathedral and whom

had been with us, helping on and off through the years, joined the staff of the parish and began to help with pastoral duties. We had grown to about 100 families.

The move to the ANCC and a more traditional liturgy was difficult for some but all were willing to change and today we have about 140 families and growing rapidly. We had moved into our new building with nothing and today have totally remodeled the space. Our most recent investment was the raising of $15,000 toward a $25,000 bill to replace the heaters and air-conditioners. This last year we also were able to secure a 25 year mortgage, securing the future.

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Due to the energies of Sr. Michele Gothro, FCM we developed a Franciscan presence in the parish and joined with the other Franciscans in the ANCC becoming part of the Franciscan Community of Mercy. Lastly, I would like to give a special “thank you” to Br. Charlie

Harster, FCM who these last 20 years has enabled our community to grow. He has been the Consultant, Sacristan, Director of Hospitality, Bookkeeper, and Jack of All Trades. Thanks for your energy and friendship.

Chapter VII-The Present and the Future

What I have learned through the struggles we have experienced at Holy Family further demonstrated the need to have different and strong voices expressed and heard. This is a recapitulation of the best of our Catholic history. It is the blossoming of our Catholic identity: unity in diversity. In this case, it is the diversity of our roles in the Church. When we deny the distinct gifts of each role, and allow our roles to be blurred and allow the boundaries to be blurred we are left in chaos and anarchy. When we attack authority simply because it is authority, we are really reacting to the pain of the past, and not the hope of the future.

Through our struggles to clarify our identity, I, and the leaders of Holy Family, have learned a great deal from this sometimes painful experience – and have clarified our self-understanding. We are more fully committed to the vision of ANCC, with its traditional liturgy which we all grew up with. Now the different voices are heard and respected. The various members of the ANCC share a more focused and united vision of who we are and where we are going. We have come to know the various charisms in the Church – each having different roles, different functions and different gifts. And we have learned that these differences are mediated, blended and orchestrated by our common identity as Catholics with a synodal polity.

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