An einem tag in November

7/21/2019 An einem tag in November

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N EINEM T G

IN NOVEMBER

TRI1112 – Commentary project

Daphne de Craecker

David Edgley

Laura Isla Navarro



CONTENTS 1.

TRANSLATION ..................................................... 1

1.1. SOURCE TEXT - AN EINEM TAG IN NOVEMBER ............ 1

1.2. TARGET TEXT – IN A DAY IN NOVEMBER ................... 2

2.

COMMENTARY .................................................... 3



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1.

TRANSLATION

1.1.

SOURCE TEXT - AN EINEMTAG IN NOVEMBER

Es war ein nettes Wochenende mit Freunden und hätte nicht in einer Tragödieenden müssen, wenn sie aufgebrochen wären, als Holger Notkötter seine Frau Elke

das erste Mal daran erinnerte, dass er am nächsten Morgen um sechs aus den Fe-dern musste und sie noch vierhundertachtzig Kilometer Heim- fahrt vor sich hatten.

Das war am Sonntagnachmittag um vier.

Angekommen waren sie am Freitagabend, zu spät und zu müde, um noch langemit Biggi und Bob beisammenzusitzen und sich zu unterhalten. Aber dafür hattenElke und ihre Freundin den ganzen Samstag und den halben Sonntag Zeit. Derursprünglich geplante Ausflug nach Hamburg fiel ins Wasser. Wer lief denn

freiwillig bei Nieselregen und Kühl- schranktemperaturen über die Reeperbahn?

Holger wäre gerne gelaufen, wenigstens mal gucken, wenn man schon in der Nähewar. Er war noch nie in Hamburg ge- wesen und hatte seine Wetterjacke dabei.Bob hätte sich wohl ebenfalls lieber auf den Weg gemacht, statt sich den ganzenSamstagabend das Geplapper der Frauen anzuhören. Aber da Bob den beidennicht widersprach, hielt Holger um des lieben Friedens willen ebenfalls den Mund.

Holger Notkötter war dreiundvierzig, Elke achtunddreißig. Sie waren erst seit elf

Monaten miteinander verheiratet. Für beide war es die zweite Ehe. Und Holgerwar fest entschlos- sen, es diesmal besser zu machen. Seine Ex hatte ihm oft vor-geworfen, er nähme zu wenig Rücksicht auf ihre Bedürfnisse, ehe sie ihre Sachenpackte und zu ihrem neuen Freund zog. Sohn und Tochter nahm sie mit.

Holger behielt die Vierzimmerwohnung in Hüppesweiler, einem Gutshof, derzwischen der Kreisstadt Bergheim und der Kleinstadt Herten im nördlichen Rhein-Erft-Kreis lag. Außer dem imposanten Gutshaus und einigen landwirtschaftlichenNebengebäuden gab es dort drei gepflegte Mietshäuser mit je sechs Wohnungen,die großzügig geschnitten und dennoch erschwinglich waren. In den meisten lebtenFamilien. Für Kinder war Hüppesweiler ein Paradies.



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1.2.

TARGET TEXT – IN A DAYIN NOVEMBER

It was a nice weekend with friends and it would not have to finish in a

tragedy, if they had to go, when Holger Notkötter reminded for the first time

to his wife Elke that he had to be the next morning at six out of the bed and

and that they still had a way of 480 km remaining in view of them.

That was at four on Sunday afternoon.

They arrived on Friday evening, so late and so tired, but to top up, they sat

and talked for a long time with Biggi and Bob. Although Elke and her friend

had still the whole Saturday and Sunday. The original planned excursion to

Hamburg did not take place. Then, who travels freely with drizzle and a

freezing temperature along the Hamburger Reeperbahn street?

Holger would have walked nicely, and at least had a look, when he was

already nearby. He had never been before in Hamburg and had his raincoat

there. Bob had likewise got used to the way, instead of spending the whole

Saturday evening listening to the women chattering. But there, Bob did not

contradict both women, and stayed mum for the sake of peace and quiet.

Holger Notkötter was forty-three years old, Elke thirty-eight. For both two

this was their second marriage. And Holger was absolute determined that

he was going to do it better this time. His ex had him often reproached that

he takes too little consideration on her necessities before she packed her

things and moved to his new boyfriend. She took their son and daughter

along.

Holger kept the four room apartment in Hüppesweiler, an estate that laid

between the district capital of Bergheim and the town of Herten in northern

Rhein – Erft – Kreis. Besides the impressive estate house and some

agricultural outbuildings, there you could find three sophisticated tenements

of six apartments each that despite being spacious were still affordable.

Most of them are dwelled by families. For their children, Hüppesweiler was

a paradise.



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2.

COMMENTARYThe suspense in which this 2014 novel An einem Tag in November

is wrapped all along its plot, invites the readers to live moments of

excitement that will animate them trying to find replies to questions

normally generated in this kind of books.

In spite of this excerpt that we previously translated does not offermuch information about the main facts of the text, right from the

start, Petra Hammesfahr wanted to emphasise that sensation of

thrilling through allocating the literary space in the month of

November, where the cold weather is starting to “act up”, and

conditioning the reader’s humour. Apart from that, Germany is the

scenery, visible not only in the characters’ names (Holger

Nörkotter, Elke…), but when German cities and districts such as

Hamburg or Hüppesweiler are mentioned. Moreover, it would be

interesting to point out as well that the author uses her work for

showing personal details. Having done some research, we could

find out that she is in a second marriage and currently is living in

Rhein – Erft – Kreis.

It is worth mentioning that despite the thrilling plot, there are as

well moments where it is allowed to burst out laughing. We are

able to see in the fourth paragraph, when one of the most common

stereotypes among women and men comes to light. Bob prefers to

disappear instead of remaining listening to the women chattering.



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Personally, we think that in some occasions the style is slightly

complicated with regard to the sentence structure that is generally

the main rendering challenge. Proof of this is shown in the first line

of the third paragraph, Angekommen waren sie, the participle is

moved to the beginning of the sentence for stressing that event.

Another matter was the adoption of certain verbal forms

complicated for English speakers such as the Konjuktiv II.

Another element we perceived was the drastic change in the last

two paragraphs. The adventure of this four friends group was

being told when suddenly we receive a sort of biography about

Holger Notkötter. This does not affect to the translation at all, but

somehow shocked us while we read it.

Taking into account all these factors, the translator must be aware

of applying a terminology that although evokes to feelings ofcoldness, should also instil the own beauty that characterize all the

literary texts. In some cases, we found necessary the application

of the transposition. For instance, the phrase In den meisten lebten

Familien was turned into the passive as Most of them are dwelled

by families.

In addition, another prominent goal is trying to transport all the

German context of these lines without deforming it into an English

one. This might be sometimes tricky due to the existence of

concepts that are present in the Germanic culture that necessarily

has not to have to exist in the Anglo-Saxon manners. Example of

that difficulty is the debate of if translating or not the original nameof cities of regions. On one hand, it would be good maintaining



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the original term for giving a more genuine atmosphere to the

novel, but on the other hand, if we are working for a foreign group

that already has a specific word for the region, we should use it

so that they can understand it completely. This time we had not too

many problems because the mentioned places did not have

possible translation in English, so we just borrow them.

The adaptation was also important when we worked with the

collocation großzügig geschnitten. The literal translation did not

really function, so doing some research we conclude saying that

this term corresponds to spacious.

Of course, we had to deal with idioms as um des lieben Friedens

leben ! for the sake of the peace and quiet too. So, obviously

the equivalence was key here.

We could not finish this commentary without alluding to how

complicated the translation of the sentence wenigstens mal

glucken was. We are still not very sure with our work in that part,

but anyway we tried to solve it by a literal translation and at least

had a look .

Once having introduced this thriller and having done a scheme of

the main difficulties, we just have to finish saying that we

interpenetrated very well as a group. Each one did a translation

and got main ideas for creating the final commentary. After that,

we met and saw all the conclusions. Finally, we created the

translation that, in our humble opinion, is the most suitable,



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although as we said before we are not fully convinced. We hope

that we can overcome these little problems as our course elapses.

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An einem tag in November