UntitledAlchemy of Loneliness A Guide to Peace of Mind on
Purpose
Copyright 2015 by Tashana Powe - All rights reserved.
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INTERNAL ALCHEMY
It is a perplexing irony, but despite our numerous technological advances and contributions to science, our world has become even more of a mystery to us than ever before. Owing to the fact that we have access to so much more information than we’d ever imagine, it appears that interests in content concerning the esoteric, metaphysics, psychology, mysticism, symbology, and various philosophies steadily climbs higher with each year. Compared to methods used centuries, or even decades ago, communicating with one another is now more cost and time efficient. As a result, it would seem that loneliness- one of the most dreaded, and also one of the most inevitable aspects of the human condition, would be easy to remedy. However, this has been proven far from true.
Studies have concluded that technology is not the only culprit to blame for increasing social isolation. In fact, social media and the like allows us either a fleeting, temporal “fix” from loneliness, or it causes the perception of loneliness to appear more exaggerated.
The state of loneliness itself is complex to define. And since there are countless reasons as to why people fall into spells of loneliness, (death of a loved one, lack of fulfilling friendships, unemployment, impaired mobility, misinterpretations of the relationships we posses, relocating to a new area, the ending of a relationship, lifestyle illness, language or cultural barrier, lack of friends, etc.), one simple solution just does not exist.
Furthermore, there is no sufficient, real definition for the opposite of
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loneliness. Being in the company of others does not always alleviate the feelings of loneliness, and at the same time, one can experience great contentment during times of “aloneness” or solitude.
Since feelings of loneliness can arise whether one is physically alone, or in the presence of others, these feelings can be described as powerful, emotional energies, which are able to be adjusted to bring solace and healing to our minds and bodies similar to other emotions we experience.
In different moments of our lives, even during the course of a single day, experiencing states of loneliness is unavoidable. Nevertheless, all hope is not lost. With intentional and genuine desire, being conscious of our actions, thoughts, and even what we intake into our bodies, it is possible to steer yourself towards your own unique path that will lead to grounded awareness and tangible peace.
The Science of Loneliness
The Science of Loneliness
There are many who have chosen to read this book out of sheer curiosity. Some may have never heard of the term alchemy, and those who have may be familiar with its concept, but are not sure as to how it can relate to loneliness. One dictionary defines alchemy as “a medieval form of chemistry that was chiefly concerned with trying to convert ordinary metals into gold.”1 Another provides a similar definition stating that alchemy is also “the way two individuals relate to each other.”2 Both are partially true, and both definitions can be applied to methods on how to gain insight into our perception of loneliness.
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The science of alchemy itself existed thousands of years before the Middle-Ages. Greek philosophers and Egyptians have long believed that a connection between the sciences and the philosophical exists. The practice of alchemy included the desire find the philosopher’s stone, an elixir that would not only turn matter of lesser value into gold, but when digested, it would bring immortality to the body and spirit. Yet, this overview is only a fraction of what the vast history of the science entails. Alchemy contained many spiritual components, and throughout history, its practitioners were ultimately seeking innovative ways to understand themselves, and the world in which they lived.
Countless texts from across the centuries still exist today depicting notes from the practitioner’s experiments, cryptic drawings, and alchemical ideas. In the same spirit, I would like all of those reading this book to imagine it to be your very own copy of an alchemic manuscript- one that is fully equipped with simple, yet effective experiments you will be able to attempt at your own pace. The necessary ingredients are readily available to you at any moment in time to concoct a personalized potion unique to your own experiences and what you feel in moments of “aloneness”. Keep these formulas with you as it will enable you to create and recognize your individual inner alchemy. In time, you will be able to transmute those unpleasant, lesser-desired energies associated with loneliness into more valuable, and productive energies. As a result, this personal elixir will activate inner restoration as well as balance to the ongoing subject of experimentation that is our daily lives.
At the end of this section you will find a short journaling exercise that will help you to invite more awareness of yourself and how you experience both loneliness and
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‘aloneness’. As a participant, you will include yourself as the independent variable in this experiment of inner alchemy. An independent variable is described as the element of a scientific experiment that is subject to change. This inner alchemy you will experience may result in new discoveries or a sense of altered perception concerning a familiar notion. With that said, feel free to record your findings in a separate notebook. In fact, I strongly urge you to do so. However, I highly recommend using the age-old method of pen and paper. Not only is writing in and of itself a therapeutic form of meditation, but the physical act of writing by hand activates the memory, along with the section of your brain that focuses on the most significant thoughts of the present.3 In time you will be able to focus for longer periods of time while eliminating distractions.
As a result, you will become more present, and more grounded in the current moment. Becoming more present and experiencing conscious awareness is a very important element to consider when dealing with loneliness, which will be covered soon in the latter part of this book.
(PART II: TRANSMUTATION: HEALING AND BALANCE)
The Brain and Body
The Brain, the Body, and Loneliness
Loneliness is often linked to depression, and perhaps rightly so. Depression can lead to feelings of loneliness and loneliness often segues into depression. Unsurprisingly, both have similar affects on the brain and body. Research has shown that the portion of the brain associated with memory in individuals suffering from either mild or severe forms of depression decreases in size.4 In the same fashion, studies have identified a connection between dementia and extreme periods of perceived loneliness.5
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Furthermore, it is a lesser-known fact, but when you are experiencing loneliness, your brain reacts as though your body is undergoing a physical attack and as a result interprets these feelings as though you are experiencing physical pain.6 The body’s temperature tends to drop, while the cortisol and blood pressure increases. Not only can chronic loneliness place our cardiovascular and immune system at risk, but it can increase the chances of stroke, cancer, as well as an early death. In the end, although the overall toll chronic loneliness has on our minds and bodies is severe, there are proven ways to counteract these affects.
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2 Journal Exercise I
In your own notebook, answer the following as thoroughly as possible. Describe how your entire body feels in moments of loneliness.
• If you are currently experiencing loneliness, describe why. • I feel most lonely when… • Describe how your entire body feels when you are most happy. • I feel most happy when… • Describe a place where you feel most safe. Think of the last time you felt most • safe. If you cannot think of one, describe a place where you would feel most
safe. • Describe a place where you feel most loved, understood, and accepted. Think of • the last time you felt most loved, understood, and accepted. • If you cannot think of one, describe a place where you would feel loved and • accepted. • What characteristics (physical, mental, spiritual, or emotional) are necessary to • you make feel most safe, accepted, and loved? • In the very place you are, how do you believe you can or cannot recreate the • feelings associated with contentment, safety, and acceptance?
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TRANSMUTATION: HEALING AND BALANCE
In the first part of this book we briefly discussed the effects loneliness has on the body and mind. The mind and its thoughts have a profound impact on the body. Now conscious of the fact that our thoughts are heavily related to how we cope and deal with loneliness, we must make intentional efforts to monitor what we allow ourselves to dwell on.
In many cases, individuals often feel lonely in their workplaces, household, schools, etc. During these times, the presence of another does not always provide enough relief to keep loneliness at bay. It is often an overwhelming feeling that there is not other person in our immediate space that is experiencing what we may be experiencing at that present moment. As a result, these feelings have a tendency to become feelings of self-defeat, self-pity, and self-loathing. To remedy this it is extremely important to develop an open space in your mind that will allow self-compassion to evolve.
The expected outcome of participating in a form of mental exercise like meditation has proven time and time again to not only acutely reverse the negative physical affects of loneliness, but it also empowers the mind of the one meditating to create such a space.
Near the end of this book you will find a guided meditation specifically designed to diminish loneliness in addition to creating an atmosphere of self-compassion, and healing.
Creativity and Healing As Subtraction
Creativity and Healing As Subtraction
Instead of promoting self-defeat, recall the fact that although you may or may not be physically alone, you are not alone in your experiences or feelings. In
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his unique book of poetry, Newspaper Blackout, author Austin Kleon penned the mysterious phrase, “creativity is subtraction.” Applying it primarily to the creative process, Kleon states that progress requires us to remove any excess or unnecessary hindrances from our sphere of consciousness.
For our own purposes, the same principle can be applied to the activity of healing. In place of anything that may hinder you from productivity during moments of loneliness, substituting it with healthy alternatives is one way to ensure healing. Unfortunately, at times, we may allow ourselves to remain in situations or make choices that prolong these thoughts and feelings. In such times it is imperative that one takes action to alter what we can and do have control over to promote healing.
For example, making the intentional effort to connect with others who share your experiences or feelings can potentially decrease feelings of loneliness. It is also necessary to mention that during states of loneliness it is strongly advised to avoid any type of substance that alters your brain chemistry, neurosystem, or consciousness in any harmful way.
On the other hand, nutritionists have discovered certain foods will lessen the sensations of depression and loneliness, while consuming others can amplify them. In this example, although we tend to crave sweet foods when we are experiencing the aforementioned emotions, foods, or drinks that contain large amounts of sugar (dark chocolate is one exception) can negatively affect our moods. The same can be said for processed foods, foods high in saturated oil, sodium, or caffeine content.7
Recent studies have also concluded that those individuals whose diets contained high portions of meat, egg yolk, or poultry, experienced more aggressive behavior, depression, emotional disorders, in comparison to those who were vegetarian or even pescatarian (diet of primarily fish).8
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In contrast, foods that contain lean protein (walnuts), omega-3 fatty acids, vitamin D, whole grains, antioxidants, or turmeric, have the opposite affect and benefit our health overall inan increasingly positive way.
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Mindful Meditation Exercise
As discussed briefly in the previous section, practicing meditation- mindfulness meditation in particular, helps to ease the mind and alleviate the body’s symptoms of loneliness of depression. By focusing on one’s breathing, and concentrating on the body’s sensations, not only is the participating individual performing the meditation able to raise their awareness, they are also able to change both the brain and body’s response to stress.
Click here to begin the mindfulness meditation exercise.
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Thank you again for downloading this book!
In the very least I hope this short book was able to help steer you in the right direction towards experiencing peace of mind on purpose during moments of loneliness.
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Bibliography
[1] Pocket Oxford American Dictionary & Thesaurus, 3rd Edition, Oxford University Press, Oxford, NY, 2010
[←2] App Phone Dictionary
[←3] Bonds, Gwendolyn. "How Handwriting Trains the Brain." WSJ. N.p., 5 Oct. 2010. Web.9 April 2015. <http:// www.wsj.comarticlesSB1000142405274870463150457553 19327549225>.
[←4] Faris, Stephanie. "The Effects of Depression on the Brain." Healthline. N.p., 28
Mar. 2012. Web. 21 March 2015. <http:// www.healthline.com/health depressioneffects-brain>.
[←5] “Marra, Bel. "The Link Between Being Lonely and Dementia." Natural Health Care Products Nutritional Health Supplements Belmarra Health. N.p., 10 Jan. 2013. Web. 15 January 2015. <http://www.belmarrahealth.com/the- link-between-beinglonely- and-dementia/>.
[←6] Bingham, John. "In Touch but Losing Touch: How the ‘connected’ Generation Are Getting Lonelier." The Telegraph. Telegraph Media Group, 7 Nov. 2013. Web. 15 April 2015. <http://www.telegraph.co.uk/
newsuknews11542309In-touch-butlosing-touch-how-the- connected- generationare-getting-lonelier.html>.
[←7] Borchard, T. "7 Foods That May Contribute to Your Depression." World of Psychology.N.p., n.d. Web. 3 March 2015.<http://psychcentral.com/ blogarchives/ 2013/07/11/7-foods-that-may-contributeto-your-depression/>.
[←8] Beezhold, Bonnie L., and Carol S. Johnston. "Restriction of Meat, Fish, and Poultry in Omnivores Improves Mood: A Pilot Randomized Controlled Trial." Nutrition Journal. N.p., 14 Feb. 2012. Web. 31 March 2015. <http:www.nutritionj.com/content/11/1/9>.
[←9] Myers, Wyatt. "8 Foods That Fight Depression." EverydayHealth.com. N.p., 24 Feb. 2015. Web. 18 February 2015. <http:www.everydayhealth.comdepressionpictures/8-foods- that-fight-depression.aspx#09>.
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Bibliography