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Page No: 1 Volume 16 Issue 11
November 16
Volume 16
Issue 11
www.warnbrosoundwanderers.ulyssesclub.org
ACE Copiers - proud Sponsors of our Ulysses Branch newsletter
Reports
News
Photos
Plans
Leaks
Jokes
Whispers
Secrets
Rumours
Classifieds
and
General Nonsense
Reports
News
Photos
Plans
Leaks
Jokes
Whispers
Secrets
Rumours
Classifieds
and
General Nonsense
Meet a Ulyssian Another Spyder
rider always ready for a laugh: meet
Alan “The Ticket Bitch”
Potter
Janette, where are you?
Page No: 2 Volume 16 Issue 11
Money Matters Hi Wanderers, The balance at the time of writing was $9622, even after Ken’s extravagant spend up on new quarter masters gear. I have warned him if he doesn’t sell a substantial amount of it before the December meeting, it will be reflected in his Christmas bonus! I told him not to make any plans to put in a pool at the Lifestyle village, and the Christmas turkey isn’t looking to promising either! I am hoping you can help him out by looking at his new stock, as the Salvos are already stretched to the limit this Christmas. Stay safe on the roads, and look out for those lane drifters with mobile phones in their laps. Hopefully some of them are using are the exploding Galaxy Phone.
Chris Glover Treasurer
President’s Prattle Hi Everyone, How time flies!! Christmas is just around the corner! It has been a busy month for Chris & myself. Between dog sitting, baby sitting, the National Committee coming over, and trying to keep up with all the rides and events, we are really looking forward to our bike tour in Thailand :-) Chris & I have been helping Tony Collins from Fremantle branch to submit a proposal to hold an AGM Event in WA. The proposal went in last month and the National AGM Event Coordinator will be over this month to check the place out. We are looking at the AGM in 2020 (seems like such a long time away) , so fingers crossed we get it. We will find out if the proposal has been successful at the AGM Event in Port Macquarie next May. The Natcom meeting that was held over here was interesting. They are trying to come up with some new initiatives of how the club can attract more members, as the membership is on the decline. As a branch, we have already been using some of their ideas, such as business cards to hand out to people and encouraging others to join our happy group. There is also an idea of a representative from each State to meet over Skype on a regular basis to discuss ways of attracting new members and improving branches. Sounds like a good plan to me, especially as it brings branches and even states as a more unified entity. If anyone wants tickets to the Christmas party, which is on the 10th December, please catch up with me at the meeting, on a ride or at Wednesday coffee. Tickets are $5 each, which is a great price for the delicious meal, a pressie and entertainment. Take care on the roads in the lead up to the silly season. Hope to see you on a ride soon.
Dianna Glover President
Page No: 3 Volume 16 Issue 11
Brmstik Babble Hi All
This month NATCOM (the National Committee) held a meeting here in Perth. Dianna and myself attended the meeting followed by a simple luncheon afterwards. This was the first time I have sat in on a meeting outside of an AGM.
I was very interesting and a lot more formal than our Branch Committee meetings. After the introductions they went around the table through each officer’s report and then everybody was invited us to ask questions or make a comment.
The WA branches represented were Perth, Joondalup, Armadale, Mandurah/Murray, Geraldton, Bunbury, Great Southern and the Warnbro Sound Wanderers, naturally.
As they wrapped up the reports one by one, each of us were able to give an overview of what we thought makes our Branches work. I am very proud of our Branch and what we have; whatever that is, it certainly works! So keep up the good work everyone!
Coming up soon is the Cockburn Power Boat Club Christmas Party on 3rd December. We are again asked to provide some rides for young and the not so young. If you can help on the day, please let me know so the Powerboat Club can cater for our lunch. I would hate for anyone to miss out!
Remember: Ride and Eat, that’s what we excel at!
Thank to those who always volunteer their time when asked, you are our treasures. Always take care, be aware and be kind to each other.
Julie Wilcox Secretary & Page 3 Girl
Good Evening All
As you might remember, the new gear I had ordered didn’t arrive in time for the last meeting. But the day after the meeting the box was delivered. Typical isn’t it. I am now well stocked for this meeting. The treasurer wrote a cheque for $700 so I could to buy the gear and now he wants his money back. Please buy up big and make him happy.
I have some great new tops for summer as well as reversible jackets and neck warmers. Better get in early for next winter! I even have Ulysses socks and BBQ aprons. How about a fashion parade of guys in aprons and socks?
Whatever it takes, just help me to get out of trouble with the treasurer.
Ken Donaldson Quartermaster
Gearshop Gossip
Page No: 4 Volume 16 Issue 11
Things We Did Last Month Champion Lakes Duathlon
On Sunday 2. October we had the first fundraiser for this “summer” (you are allowed to laugh). We met at the un-godly time of 6.15 am at the Freeway Servo in Baldivis. It took us 15 minutes to ride to Champion Lakes. Then we sat on our backsides until 8.15; and without chairs.
That’s the way it usually is; the or-ganisers panic when we are not there at least an hour before they get out of bed and then they ignore us until after breakfast.
Eventually, we collected our designated “Technical Officers” (referees), put them on the back of our bikes, circled the lake six
times, received our $50 reimbursement and left for home at 9.30 am. That’s it. All done for another day.
Give it some thought: If you are a competent and confident rider, don’t mind a female passenger and some extra cash, why not put your name forward for the next Triathlon or Iron Man. It’s easy money. And you could have the pleasure of my company.
It’s just these bl….y early starts that give me the willies.
Werner
Wayne catching up on his Beauty Sleep
Still waiting I’ve done this before, she said
Page No: 5 Volume 16 Issue 11
The Shakespeare Ride - Much Udo About Nothing One windy Saturday morning in October, my boss told me: “Get on your bike and get out of the house. The rain is all gone and it will do you good”. And so it was; at 9.30am I met with many of the greedy buggers of the Warnbro Sound Wanderers. We hopped on our bikes (a lot hopped into their cars) and made our way to Cannington. There, a new Indian and Victory dealership had an opening party and was giving away a new Indian Scout motorbike to one lucky visitor on that day. Did anyone come with a trailer? I guess we all have travelled a lot further than 50 ks for a lot less than a new $20,000 bike?
Those of us on the bikes had made a somewhat poor choice; it was wet and not at all as pleasant as forecast by my boss. In addition to that, the roads seemed extremely slippery. When BIG L3N tried to stop to mark a corner, he found himself sliding straight on with his wheels locked up. Unfazed by it all, he marked the corner from the middle of the intersection. Well done, L3N. Later on, when I had to overtake a couple of dreamers in their cars on Nicholson Road, my rear wheel tried to overtake my front wheel; thank God my front wheel would have none of that nonsense and decided to stay in front. It got pretty warm under my jacket for a moment there.
Chris lead the ride and his back seat GPS took us down every hidden suburban street she could find, plus through some roadworks and a pretty nice detour. Eventually we did arrive at the new Indian & Victory Shop in Cannington, but it was a long time after we left Warnbro. Our speed averaged out at 32.7 km per hour. No point arguing Chris, maths is always right!
When we arrived at the shop, we met plenty of other greedy people, a lot of bikes with an extraordinary amount of chrome and shiny bits and some loud music. Most of us stayed indoors in the dry warmth of the pretty impressive shop and waited for the draw to win the bike. As the cue on the coffee van was about a country mile long, I wandered across to the Carousel Shopping Centre for a coffee and some lunch. Every half our, the organisers drew a winner out of a hat who received a bike jacket and a key. At 1.00pm those winners were to try their key on a red Indian Scout; and whoever could start the bike was its new owner. As I had not won a jack-
et (nor a key) at the last draw, I hopped on my bike at 12.30 and made my way home. On my return trip, my average speed was just a fraction under 90 km per hour.
Yes, that’s possible. No, I didn’t get a ticket. (not yet, anyway)
All said and done, it wasn’t a bad way to spend an otherwise boring Saturday morning. Werner
How could anybody do this to a bike?
This is Indian today - very, very, very American
This was Indian when they started
Page No: 6 Volume 16 Issue 11
Two Bakeries Ride
On Sunday 16. October, Sed had organised one of his favourites rides; the Two Bakeries Ride. You all know what I’m talking about:, don’t you? But just in case you haven’t known Sed for half your life, here is my report of this one. (or what I remember of it)
Muster point as usual was the Warnbro Shopping Centre carpark at an acceptable time of 9.00 am. Having it organised properly (take note you godless early riders!) most of us old farts were awake enough to roll out of bed without stabbing our toes on all corners on the way to the bathroom. It also left us enough time to look at the shower on the way to the garage.
Having assembled his crowd, Sed took off at his normal brisk pace down Ennis Avenue and along Safety Bay Road to our first stop: morning “Tea” at the Byford Bakery.
Strange that I remember that only one cup of tea that was actually ordered for this “Morning Tea”. The rest had everything else, from pies and pasties to biscuits and cakes; and Joe had his “MT” in the form of half a pig garnished with a market garden plus and an egg farm with half a truck of grain; yes, he had the works with bacon, sausages, eggs, toast, tomatoes, etc, etc. There is the reason why Joe’s transport has one more wheel than most of us; you all have seen what he can load up at simple “Morning Tea”. Plus he always has “an appetite” at lunch. But let’s get to that later.
In Byford, we were welcomed by some members who live in a land far, far away beyond the black stump: Mr and Mrs Armstrong and their tribe were waiting for us! As usual, they came by Ag-bike to show us how far modern British bikes have come. They now last nearly a whole 4 weeks once you buy one, then the dealer (workshop) will switch you over to a “loner”. And as Gae said some time ago: “It ain’t a Goldwing”. At least her grandkid was entertained by her climbing equipment.
Then Brian tried to draw the Joker; “tried” being the operative word here. Don’t worry Brian, there wasn’t much money in the pot this time around and I’m going to win it anyway!
After a feeding frenzy and once we had chatted until our dentures came loose, Sed called time. Within thirty seconds we all were back on our bikes, revving up, rearing to go.
Strangely enough, Sed had lost some of his gearbox: He could not find second gear and stuck to the speed limits all the way into Armadale and on through the Hills to Kalamunda. We cruised half dreaming through the beautiful green landscape of the
Perth Hills, enjoying a somewhat warm-ish sunshine. After passing the cops setting up a Booze Bus near Gidgegannup we eventually arrived at the Gidgie Bakery for “lunch”. We all were actually desperate for a stop, we hadn’t eaten or chatted for nearly 40 minutes! So we did what comes naturally to all Ulyssians: Eat and Talk. As we made our way home, the guy in front of me did not indicate and all of a sudden we were going down the road by ourselves. No worries but, we all made it home alive and well to do it all over again next Sunday. Werner
A Ulyssian having “Tea” A loner Trumpy - good for …
Page No: 7 Volume 16 Issue 11
SOCIAL NEWS
Spring is in the air! As you can see, people do what comes naturally; even at Pengos. Our roving reporter Jill shot this picture of Miss X popping ‘The Question’. Jill could not confirm Werner’s response but she promised Miss X to be his bridesmaid if it all works out. Judging by the look on
Werner’s face, this editor does not hold out much hope for that.
We heard rumours that Werner did ask some tough questions of Miss X, i.e. “Can you support me at the level I am accustomed to; do you have a Goldwing”. The issue of asking Werner’s parents for permission has not been raised yet as far as we know. Our newsroom is still waiting for an official statement from Miss X on this matter We expect that we might have to wait a very long time for that as well.
No further details will be revealed as we have to comply with our NEWS policy: What happens at Pengos, stays at Pengos.
PS: If you want to meet Miss X, check the sole of his riding boots.
The Editor
OUR LIST WHY WE SHOULD NOT RIDE A MOTORCYCLE:
Page No: 8 Volume 16 Issue 11
Casserole Night at Glen and Jim’s
It was that time of the month again; on Friday 28. October some 22 Ulyssians gathered at Glen and Jim’s to do (again) what we are really good at: Eat and Talk.
Everybody brought something along and Glen and Jim opened their house and set everything up for us on their patio. You are right Jim; I wouldn't let a bunch like us into my house either. When I counted our mob, I found that we had matching numbers. Eleven ladies and eleven gentlemen had shown up. Strange how things work out for us, isn’t it. We are just sooooo good when it comes to social interaction, aren’t we. When Glen announced that the food was ready, a great stampede went from the patio into her kitchen. Some of us were trampled underfoot but got up again quickly, dusted themselves off and went for an even greater portions to make up for the delay. Even Sedley went three times. That he threw one lot on the floor had nothing to do with that! Once order was restored, we tucked in and made our comments about anything and anybody. Let me clarify this; we do not just gossip, we commit verbal murder! As you can see in the photos, we really like doing that.
Rounding off a very pleasant evening, Sonia came up with an idea. And because she was going on a trip the very next morning, she asked me to put it together and let you know: She took close-ups of some members and wants you to find out who that is. Simple. Simple?
Put your answers (numbers 1 - 3 with a name to each number) on a piece of paper, put your name on it as well and bring it along to the Christmas Party. The member who gets most right will receive a cup of coffee from Sonia next time at Pengos. If there is more than one winner, we will draw straws.
Who am I: To make it a bit easier, Sonia asked me to give you a few clues; so I can tell you that
1. All three are Warnbro Wanderers and are male or female 2. All three are over 16 years of age 3. All three went to Glen and Jim’s on 28. October 2016
I hope that helps. (har har)
Werner
1
2
Sed knows what he’s doing
They were looking at ...
3
Page No: 9 Volume 16 Issue 11
The York-ish Ride Once again, Chris and Dianna had invited us to an early morning start for a ride to the Byford Bakery and then on to York. Before we left Warnbro, Dianna held a little speech. She reminded everyone to mark all the corners! She repeated that 4 times! She also explained that the ride would be about 120 ks from Byford to York and about 150-ish k back home. Yeah, nice one Dianna.
Naturally, one guy left his corner near Kalamunda before Tail End Charlie arrived and Sedley went straight through a roundabout into a dead end. Next time Dianna will give that guy a sticker for the inside of his visor: “Wait for Tail End Charlie”.
Dianna had estimated our trip distance well enough, I arrived home after 395 ks. So 120-ish plus 150-ish equals 400-ish; “ish” being the accurate-ish part of Dianna’s estimate. Regardless, the ride was just perfect. It was sunny and warm-ish when the temperature rose early. I don’t know how Chris & Dianna found that motocross track we went over near Byford, that ‘thing’ should not show on any map or even on Google Earth.
When I looked around while we were having coffees, teas, cakes and pies at the Byford Bakery, I wondered if it would not be cheaper if we just bought the place? We would have our money back after a couple of summers, easy. But then I saw Jim. That changed everything.
After leaving Byford, we followed Chris and Dianna through some beautiful scenery up the Bedfordale Hill, passed the Mundaring Wear and on to Kalamunda.
After we were re-united with Sed, we took a quickie up the Great Eastern Highway before rolling down from The Lakes into York. Warm sunny weather, a smooth and very sexy (= curvy) road and good friends all around; what else could you ask for?
When we arrived in York, there was no parking space in the main street and Chris had to lead us around to the rear car park of the Castle Hotel. Again, corner marking did not happen. Chris had to hop back on his bike to guide our later-comers into the car park. Memo to all: MARK YOUR CORNER AND WAIT FOR TAIL END CHARLIE. Before, during and after lunch we discussed many of the important issues of our times. This time it was the size of a cow. Yep, most important for all Ulyssians; the size of a cow. Thanks Keith, we really needed to know that.
After lunch, we swarmed into the local servo to fill up for the way home. It must have sent the cashier over the edge. Imagine: $3,45 worth of super followed by “I had pump no 4; that’s $1.75. Do you take credit card and do I get a senior’s discount?” What an awful way to make a living.
Soon after we were led a new way home; we even crossed the York-Williams Road. Did we get that far south? I couldn’t stop at the twinkle stop at the Kelmscott servo because my boss needed to do some shopping on a farm. She absolutely needed some free range eggs, today! Oh, the things we do for love. But my real problem started when I checked my photos at the end of the day. They were absolutely sh....t; I could only use a couple but I hope you like them anyway.
Werner
One look at Jim
mature Senior, sure
Page No: 10 Volume 16 Issue 11
MORE PICS FROM THE YORK RIDE
Page No: 11 Volume 16 Issue 11
Use of this name for any other purpose or event is regarded as offensive and disrespectful to this worthwhile event.
Joondalup Branch of Ulysses Club is organising a spot near the front of the ride, so look out for the
Ulysses riders at the ride assembly point. SUNDAY 4 DECEMBER 2016 is the 41st Annual Perth Bikers'
Charity Ride. Yes for the first time ever, the Perth Bikers' Charity Ride will be held on a SUNDAY! . As
normal, we will leave from the car park at Belmont Park Racecourse, adjacent to Goodwood Parade at
11am SHARP! MAKE SURE you are there BEFORE 10.30am. There are no corporate sponsorships and
every gift donated by the participants of this event is given "directly" to the Salvation Army in support
of their Annual Christmas Appeal. So, unlike other events, there are no "part proceeds" it is all for the
Salvos, as it should be! This year the Perth band "Clincher" will be playing at Arena Joondalup for your
entertainment, so make sure you stay to hear them, plus there will be vendors and kids activities going
on that afternoon. We will have a bike show on the day as well, the details of which will be announced
soon. The Perth Biker’s Charity Ride is 41 years old in 2016 and is the longest running motorcycle charity
event in Australia.
2016 MANDURAH 25TH ANNUAL CHARITY RIDE.
Stalls Sausage Sizzle Music Entertainment
SATURDAY, 10th DEC Depart from The Red Lion, South Yunderup 10.00am
FREEMASONS
Page No: 12 Volume 16 Issue 11
WSW CHRISTMAS PARTY MENU
MEATS
Tender roast Beef with Gravy
Rolled, stuffed Turkey with Cranberry jam
Shaved Ham “off the bone”
VEGETABLES
Rosemary roasted Butternut Pumpkin & Baby Potatoes
Steamed green Beans & Peas
Honey Carrots
Creamy Potato Bake
SALADS
Garden Salad
Potato Salad
Coleslaw
All served with white Dinner rolls & butter
DESSERTS
Sticky Date Pudding with Butterscotch sauce
Warm Apple Crumble with Custard
Fresh Fruit Platter
Cream & Ice Cream
TEA & COFFEE SUPPLIED
BYO ALL OTHER DRINKS
Saturday 10th December 5pm – 10pm
Port Kennedy Community Centre Cnr Discovery Crescent & Clipper Drive
TICKETS $5 EACH - ADMISSION BY TICKET ONLY MUST BE PURCHASED BY 1st DECEMBER
Page No: 13 Volume 16 Issue 11
Things We Like The Aussie BBQ Routine
1. Woman buys food. 2. Woman makes salad. 3. Woman collects utensils and takes food to man. 4. Man puts food on BBQ. 5. Woman goes inside and organises plates etc. 6. Woman tells man that meat is burn-ing. 7. Man deals with burning meat while having another beer. 8. Man takes meat off BBQ and gives to woman. 9. Woman serves food and clears and cleans dishes. 10. Everyone praises man on great BBQ and thanks HIM. 11. Man comments on how he gave woman the night off cooking. 12. Man is totally confused by the look of frustration on woman’s face.
Only in Wales
Page No: 14 Volume 16 Issue 11
Please submit your notice to “[email protected]” as early as possible to allow for a timely publication.
PRE-SALE My Goldwing will be for sale later this year. She has hardly aged and is in perfect condi-tion. This is a touring bike with power and comfort and she does not damage your ears. Specifications: 1997 Honda Goldwing Aspencade, 1500 cc 6 cylinder, currently 95000 k, new seat, tow bar, drive on-drive off main Stand air suspension, built-in compressor, etc, etc
asking $ 10,500
contact Werner on 0466 - 964 480 email: [email protected]
Fun on a Goldwing
FOR SALE 1996 Kawasaki Vulcan 800
91,500 km, rego 10/16 + 6 months with saddle bags, windscreen and top box,
comes with a rear wheel bike lifter
only $2,000 ono
contact Brian on 9593 0015
FOR SALE
Deluxe off-road Cruiser Make: Ulysses model: Old Fart
Quality made in Nigeria
Page No: 15 Volume 16 Issue 11
Page No: 16 Volume 16 Issue 11
Page No: 17 Volume 16 Issue 11
President Dianna Glover 0419 - 919 275 [email protected]
Secretary Julie Wilcox 0402 - 955 399 [email protected]
Treasurer Chris Glover 0419 - 919 275 [email protected]
Ride Coordinators Derek Wilcox 9593 1905 [email protected] Chris Glover 0419 - 919 275
Public Relations Officer Joe Casserly 0422 - 122 434 [email protected]
General Committee Members Keith Wellfare 0411 - 489 061 Alan Potter 0438 - 657 796
Quarter Master Ken Donaldson 0427 - 409 261
Webmaster Chris Cooper 0477 - 588 007 [email protected]
Welfare Officer Glen Mackie 0409 - 116 883 [email protected]
The News - Editor Werner Wilmes 0466 - 964 480 [email protected]
The News - Relief Editor Sue Casserly 0450 - 745 833 [email protected]
Armadale Heritage Meet first Thursday each month. 8:00pm Narrogin Inne, Armadale [email protected]
Broome West Kimberly broomewestkimbeley @ulysses.org.au
Bunbury Meet first Wednesday each month. 7:00pm Highway Hotel, Bunbury [email protected]
Esperance [email protected]
Fremantle Meet 2nd Thursday each month 8:00pm Swan Yacht Club, Fremantle [email protected]
Geraldton Meet first Wednesday each month. 7:30pm Camel Bar, Geraldton [email protected]
Great Southern [email protected] 0459138806
Joondalup Meet 2nd Tuesday each month. 8:00pm Glengarry Tavern, Warwick [email protected]
Kalgoorlie Meet 2nd Saturday each month 6:00pm Kalgoorlie Club, Egan St [email protected]
Mandurah Murray [email protected]
Perth Meet last Wednesday each month. 8pm Victoria Park Hotel Albany Hwy [email protected]
Pilbara [email protected]
Warnbro Sound Wanderers Meet 2nd Tuesday each month. 8:00pm Indigo Bar @ Leisure Inn Chalgrove Ave/ Read St. R’ham. warnbrosoundwanderers @ulysses.org.au
Never settle with words
what you can accomplish
with a Flamethrower
WSW Committee Members Thought Of The Month WA Ulysses Branches
WSW Ex-Officio Members The Final Straw
