Academic Writing: The Common

College EssayKimberly Kern

English Language Fellow, IHCIKimberly.kern@ihcihn.com

Information from: collegeapps.about.com, essayhell.com

About me:I studied Art History at the University of Texas

Then I received my Masters in Education at Hunter College in New York City

I loved college and hope you will too!

What do we know about essay writing?

Who has started their college essay?

Why did you pick your option?

Types of Essays:InformationalPersuasiveCompare and ContrastDescriptiveNarrative- the most informal, written with “I”, written as a story!

Essay Format-Narrative Every essay has three important parts:

Introduction- this is where you “hook” the reader. It has to be strong if you want them to keep reading.Body- this is where you tell an anecdote and evaluate how it was important to your life. The evaluation is way more important than the story. The readers should learn something new and interesting about YOU.Conclusion- by the end of your essay, make sure you have answered the question and finish on an interesting point. Link back to your anecdote and write about how it defines you and what you learned.

General Tips:You have 650 words. Present yourself as an interesting and unique individual who will be a positive addition to the campus community. Don’t repeat information that can be found in your application. Don’t waste this opportunity!Make sure your essay has a good story and captures YOU.Your essay must include some self-analysis

Pay attention to style, tone, and mechanics. The essay is mainly about you, but it is also about your writing ability.

Essay Option #1Option #1: Some students have a background or story that is so central to their identity that they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story.

What is it that makes you you?Look inward and explain how and why your identity was influenced by your background or story.The story you tell needs to be central to your identity, and it needs to make your application more complete

Tips: Essay #1Make sure your story involves a problem. Normal or everyday topics or stories work best.

Structure:

Introduction: Start at the peak of the action of your story.Body: Describe what you saw, smelled, heard and felt. Include dialogue, if it works. Give a little background explaining what led up to that moment or event or problem, and then go on to describe how you handled it, and what you learned from it.Conclusion- Tell how you plan to use what you learned in your future goals and dreams, especially if it relates to your educational goals.

Essay Option #2Recount an incident or time when you experienced failure. How did it affect you, and what lessons did you learn?

It is important to show your ability to learn from your failures and mistakesWhat was your response to failure, and how did you learn and grow from the experience?Introspection and honesty is key.

Tips: Essay #2“Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising up every time we fail.”- Ralph Waldo Emerson

It doesn’t have to be a time you “failed,” but a time you didn’t succeed, or win, or finish, or complete something, or get what you wanted, or do what was expected, or when something went sideways, or you changed something about yourself.The important is what you learned and how it defines you as a person!

Example Essay #2Introduction

Striking Out

I've played baseball ever since I could remember, but somehow, at fourteen, I still wasn't very good at it. You'd think that ten years of summer leagues and two older brothers who'd been the stars of their teams would have rubbed off on me, but you'd be wrong. I mean, I wasn't completely hopeless. I was pretty fast, and I could hit my oldest brother's fastball maybe three or four times out of ten, but I wasn't about to be scouted for college teams.

 

AnecdoteMy team that summer, the Bengals, wasn't anything special, either. We had one or two pretty talented guys, but most, like me, were just barely what you could call decent. But somehow we'd almost scraped through the first round of playoffs, with only one game standing between us and semifinals. Predictably, the game had come down to the last inning, the Bengals had two outs and players on second and third base, and it was my turn at bat. It was like one of those moments you see in movies. The scrawny kid who no one really believed in hits a miraculous home run, winning the big game for his underdog team and becoming a local legend. Except my life wasn't The Sandlot, and any hopes my teammates or coach might've had for a last-minute rally to victory were crushed with my third swing-and-miss when the umpire sent me back to the dugout with a "strike three - you're out!”

How the author felt/response

I was inconsolably angry with myself. I spent the entire car ride home tuning out my parents' words of consolation, replaying my strike-out over and over in my head. For the next few days I was miserable thinking about how, if it hadn't been for me, the Bengals might have been on their way to a league victory, and nothing anyone said could convince me that the loss wasn't on my shoulders.

What the author learnedAbout a week later, some of my friends from the team

got together at the park to hang out. When I arrived, I was a little surprised that no one seemed to be mad at me - after all, I'd lost us the game, and they had to be disappointed about not making it to the semifinals. It wasn't until we split into teams for an impromptu pickup game that I started to realize why no one was upset. Maybe it was the excitement of reaching the playoffs or the pressure of living up to my brothers' examples, but sometime during that game, I'd lost sight of why most of us played summer league baseball. It wasn't to win the championship, as cool as that would have been. It was because we all loved to play. I didn't need a trophy or a Hollywood come-from-behind win to have fun playing baseball with my friends, but maybe I needed to strike out to remember that.

Essay Option #3Reflect on a time when you challenged a belief or idea. What prompted you to act? Would you make the same decision again?

Your essay needs to reveal one of your core personal values.The belief you challenge has to show your personality.Be honest.The "belief or idea" you explore could be your own, someone else's, or that of a group. The answer to the second question doesn’t have to be “yes.”

Tips: Essay #3Religious belief? Gender belief? Racial or cultural one? Could you stretch the meaning of a “belief or idea” into an assumption, opinion or prejudice?Include action! What prompted you? Then, reflect, analyze, and evaluate.

Structure:

Introduction: Describe a time when you challenged an idea. This is the “hook.” This is the action and story!Body: Explain how it made you feel. What made you decide you didn’t accept it, “what prompted you to act,” how you responded to it, and what you learned in the processConclusion: Would you do it again?

Essay Option #4Describe a place or environment where you are perfectly content. What do you do or experience there, and why is it meaningful to you?

It could be many things--a house, a classroom, a tree top, a church, a stadium, a stage, a family, a country, an imagined space, a book, an internal place.The "why" is more important than the place.Be introspective and share what you value.Think about where and when you are the happiest, and then analyze the source of that happiness.

Tips: Essay #4Think about “a time” when you were not perfectly content–upset, worried, restless, anxious, depressed, scared–and where you went to feel better. Then examine why and how you found a different environment to help you recover, and what about that place helped you feel better.Think of a place or environment where no one would expect you to be content. Karaoke? Hospital?

Find a place where you didn’t used to be content, but now are content.

Structure: Describe the environment using concrete and sensory details. What does it look like? Do you hear anything? Smell anything? How does it feel there? Then give more background (Who, what, when, where and how) and explain the place or environment, and why you like it when most people don’t, and what this means to you.

Narrative= using senses

Essay Option #5Discuss an accomplishment or event, formal or informal, that marked your transition from childhood to adulthood within your culture, community, or family.

Explore a single event or achievement that marked a clear transition in your personal development.Don’t write the "hero" essay.Analyze your personal growth process; don’t brag about an accomplishment.

Tips: Essay #5An incident, issue or experience where you faced a challenge, an obstacle or something that was difficult to deal with, and share how you handled it, and what you learned from it.What qualities did you develop? For example, did you start being more responsible? Insightful? Empathetic? Self-disciplined? Find any times you were surprised by an event, activity or experience where you suddenly had to express more “mature” qualities, or make more “adult-like” decisions–and what you learned from that.

To Summarize!A Narrative essay:

Always use the most specific word or words you can!You must be concise AND clear!Make a point! What is the main purpose of your essay?Use sensory detail… vivid description!Use conflict and sequence to tell a storyMay use dialogue.

Which essay will you write?First, brainstorm! Look at the

list of topics. Write short stories, or anecdotes, for a few. The anecdotes must be interesting!Then begin to draft!Revising comes next, then editing!

An anecdote is an example of a point you want to make that uses a little story or animated

description.During a walk near my home, I found a long stick that

looked like the letter “Y.” I smoothed the surface with sandpaper and covered it with blueberry blue paint I found in the garage, then wrapped it with twine and colored yarn. From my junk drawer, I tied seashells, a couple old keys and a bent fork to the ends and hung it in my room.

“What’s that?” my little sister asked.

“Art,” I said, even though I wasn’t even sure what I had made.

Words to NEVER use!A lotStuffVerylotsreally

ThingsManyPrettyNicegood

See you on Thursday!We will be reviewing structure, tone, style, and mechanics!Bring a draft of your essay so we can work on it!

Thanks!