ACADEMIC WRITING IMay 8th 2012

Today• Continue business writing (writing a business letter)

• Information for Paper 4

Business writingPurpose:

A business writing may be used to:

- make an inquiry.

- make a complaint.

- introduce or promote a product.

- apologize

- application

- and others…

Business writing• One important aspect of business writing:

• It usually represents a direct communication between one person and another.

• For example, a business letter is usually addressed specifically to someone (not writing for a “general reader”).

Business writing

• “How would I feel if I received this letter?”

• This helps highlight an important feature of “”Business English”.

• Try to be as positive as possible (even in relatively negative situations).

• - Being overly negative does not help any business.

Return address(your address)

Recipient’s name and address

- Full name- Job title- Address line 1- Address line 2- Address line 3

Salutation (greeting)

“Dear ______”

body

Complementary closing

(Closing salutation)

Sincerely, signature

Sender’s nameTitle

Structure of business letters

In summary:

1. Salutation

2. Body

3. Closing salutation

Business letter format• There are several formats for business letters.

• We will use the simplest format: block format.

• In block format, all text is aligned to the left of the page.

Active vs. Passive voice

• “I threw the ball.”

• vs.

• “The ball was thrown by me.”

Active vs. Passive voice• In the active voice, the subject “acts”.

• - I threw the ball.

• - You are making too much noise.

• - Tim will eat pizza and watch TV tomorrow evening.

• In each of these, the subject performs the action of the verb (threw, making, will eat).

Active vs. Passive voice• In the active voice, the subject “acts”.

• - I threw the ball.• - You are making too much noise.• - Tim will eat pizza and watch TV tomorrow evening.

• In each of these, the subject performs the action of the verb.

This is clearer and more direct about who is doing what.

Active vs. Passive voice• In the passive voice, the subject is passive; it is acted on.

• - The ball was thrown by me.

• - Too much noise is being made by you.

• - Tomorrow evening, pizza will be eaten and TV will be watched by Tim.

• In each of these, the subject (the ball, too much noise, pizza, a movie) is being acted upon by the verb.

Active vs. Passive voice• In the passive voice, the subject is passive; it is acted on.

• - The ball was thrown.

• - Too much noise is being made.

• - Tomorrow evening, pizza will be eaten and TV will be watched.

• In each of these, the subject (the ball, too much noise, pizza, a movie) is being acted upon by the verb.

Active vs. Passive voice• In the passive voice, the subject is passive; it is acted on.

• - The ball was thrown by me.• - Too much noise is being made by you.• - Tomorrow evening, pizza will be eaten and TV will be

watched by Tim.

• In each of these, the subject (the ball, too much noise, pizza, a movie) is being acted upon by the verb.

• This can be confusing and sometimes boring to the reader.

Active vs. Passive voice• Usually, it is better to write in the active voice.

• It is easier to understand, and is more direct.

• “The sales receipt must be enclosed with the merchandise before we can process the refund.”

• vs.

• “Please enclose the sales receipt with the merchandise, so that we can send your refund promptly.”

Active vs. Passive voice• Usually, it is better to write in the active voice.

• It is easier to understand, and is more direct.

• Phrases in the passive tense tend to be “wordy” (use too many words).

• Usually, you want to express your ideas in less words.

Active vs. Passive voice• Active voice is especially important in business writing

since business writing is about people doing things (and being efficient!).

Active vs. Passive voice• Editing for passive voice:

• - look for the use of “was”.

• it is often associated with passive voice.

• The report was written by me.

• My bicycle was being ridden by me.

Active vs. Passive voice• Editing for passive voice:

• - look for the use of “by” when referring to who did something.

• it is often associated with passive voice.

• The report was written by me.

• My bicycle was being ridden by me.

Active vs. Passive voice

• Rewrite these into active voice:

• The report was written by me.

• My bicycle was being ridden by me.

• Books have been found by the team.

• Exams must be written by the students.

• The report was written by me.• - I wrote the report.

• My bicycle was being ridden by me.• - I was riding my bicycle.

• Books have been found by the team.• - The team found some books.• - The tteam has found some…• Exams must be written by the students.

• - Students must write exams.

Active vs. Passive voice• Using passive voice is always wrong, RIGHT?

• WRONG!

Passive voice• Passive voice can be useful for avoiding assigning

responsibility.

• - This is especially useful in avoiding responsibility for mistakes.

• “We made some mistakes.” (active voice)

• “Mistakes were made.” (passive voice)

Passive voice• Passive voice can be useful for avoiding assigning

responsibility.

• - This is especially useful in avoiding responsibility for mistakes.

• “We lost all of our records.” (active voice)

• “All our records have been lost.” (passive voice)

Passive voice• Passive voice can also be useful for avoiding “I” in

academic writing.

• “I conducted a survey about job satisfaction.”

• “ A survey was conducted about job satisfaction.”

Business language• Business language can be complicated at times.

• You might find yourself asking “what does that mean?”

Accordingly, we are requesting the financial assistance of 123 inc. to help cover the costs directly related to holding that event. 

= “We want some money from you.”

Business language• Your support for this important annual event would be

greatly appreciated by everyone involved.

• = “We REALLY want you to help us.”

Business language• I would also ask you to convey my sincere thanks and

congratulations to all of those other people in your company who contributed in any way to the Helping the Homeless Campaign.

• = “Please say ‘thank you’ to everyone for me.”

Business language• Allow me to introduce the “The Miracle Cleaner”, a

product that…

• = “I want to tell you about this product.”

Business language• Because of your expertise in business writing, we would

be honored to host you as a speaker…

• = “We need you at our conference because you are an expert on business writing.”

Business language• In reference to our previous communication regarding

XYZ, I am writing to confirm…

• = “You agreed to speak at our conference, so please come.”

Business language• The best way to get accustomed to business language is

to read (and analyze) examples.

• Do a search, or check the link on the website:

• http://www.writinghelp-central.com/sample-letters-business.html

Paper 4 – write a business letter1. The university has approved your request for a guest speaker. Write an invitation letter asking Aaron Rodgers, the public relations director of the company you are researching to speak in class next week.

2. You are researching a company for your business class assignment. Write to Cynthia Lennon, the public relations director of the company you are researching, and ask for information about her company.

3. You are a sales representative for your company. Write a letter to Paul Coffey of Real Big Enterprises introducing one of your new products or services. Remember to give important details about your product (or service).

Paper 4 – write a business letter

You will notice that the only information given is the context for the letter, and the name and position of the recipient.

You will create the rest of the information yourself.

i.e., what kind of company you are writing to, what your product is (option 3), etc.

It will be very useful to make an outline first!!

Paper 4 – write a business letter

Instructions:

Choose ONE of the options.

Do a search on the website link for the kind of business letter you are writing.

Write a business letter.

Deadline: Friday 11:59 p.m. (EMAIL ONLY)