above

beneath

What’s seen on the outside:15% - 10% (appearance)

What’s really happening on the inside:85% - 90% (emotions)

People are like icebergs!

JESUS & E.Q.A Biblical and Pastoral studyPart 1Rolan Monje, DpTh, MMin

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How’s your EQ?

• EQ = emotional quotient; index of emotional intelligence

• Popularized by Daniel Coleman in his book “Emotional Intelligence: Why it can matter more than IQ”

• The range of emotions that humans have is unique; (it makes us human)

Made in God’s image (Gen 1.27)

• (MKJV) And God created man in His image; in the image of God He created him. He created them male and female.

• (TAB) At nilalang ng Dios ang tao ayon sa kaniyang sariling larawan, ayon sa larawan ng Dios siya nilalang; nilalang niya sila na lalake at babae.

Spheres of being human

As seen in Jesus

• Spiritual• Physical• Social• Emotional

The phenomenon in the church

• Over emphasis on the spiritual sphere

• Neglect of the other spheres/aspects of humanity

• Wrong idea (from wrong theology) that to be ‘spiritual’ means suppressing the other aspects

In Asia especially…• Perhaps the most neglected and

misunderstood sphere is that of emotions.

• We can think its just ‘being Pinoy’• We can assume that some Christians

are emotionally mature just because they are ‘spiritual.’

• We cannot grow to spiritual maturity unless we grow emotionally.

Looking inward

Dag Hammarskjold, former Secretary General of the U.N.:

“The longest journey of any person is the journey inward”

#1 Jesus had the highest EQ

• Jesus had the full range of human emotions

• Jesus took responsibility for his feelings

• Jesus did not suppress his feelings• Jesus did not project his feelings onto

others

#1 Jesus had the highest EQ(some emotional experiences)

• Jesus was deeply disturbed in Spirit (Jn 11)• He wept over Lazarus (Jn 11)• He wept over Jerusalem (Lk 19)• He was angry with his disciples (Mk 10)• He was furious at temple commercialism (Jn 2)• He showed astonishment (Mt 8)• He had an emotional longing for friends (Lk 22)• He showed compassion for widows, lepers, and

blind men (Mt 20, Mk 1, Lk 7)

Jesus’ awareness

Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power, and that he had come from God and was returning to God – Jn 13.3

#2 Jesus made people assess their motivations

• Jesus wanted people to work on their insides, before minding the outside (Mt 6, Mt 23)

• Jesus pointed people to ‘why’ questions (Lk 6, Jn 4)

Matthew’s list of ‘why’ questions• MT 6:28 "And why do you worry about clothes?• MT 7:3 "Why do you look at the speck of sawdust

in your brother's eye…• MT 8:26 …why are you so afraid?" Then he got up

and rebuked the winds…• MT 9:4 Knowing their thoughts, Jesus said, "Why

do you entertain evil thoughts…• MT 15:3 Jesus replied, "And why do you break the

command of God…• MT 19:17 "Why do you ask me about what is

good?“• MT 26:10 Aware of this, Jesus said to them, "Why

are you bothering this woman?

Practical challenges

#1 Do not hide or deny your feelings

• Be honest in your times with God• Beware of the tendency of churches

– You are more spiritual if you don’t feel– “Kaya ko pa ‘to” attitude– “Dapat ‘di nila ako makitang mahina”

• Build a support group around you

We can’t run from feelings

Being honest can be difficult

#2 Ask the ‘why’ questions

• Why do I do what I do?• Why am I a Christian today?• Why do I protect my faith?• Why am I here?

#2 Ask the tough ‘why’ questions

• Why do I want to have a successful ministry?

• Why do I want to lead?• Why is it that I am always late for

meetings, and for church?• Bakit ako hyper-sensitive (balat-

sibuyas) sa comments ng iba?• Why am I avoiding a certain person?

#2 Ask the tough ‘why’ questions

• Why do I have a hard time confronting people at church?

• Why do I hesitate to share my faith?• Bakit ako critical sa taong ito?• Why can’t I open this up to my

spouse?• Bakit ako hindi seryoso sa

commitment?• Why am I attracted to this sin?

Asking the ‘why’ questions

• Provides you a starting point for repentance

• Helps point you to Scripture• Gives hope to move forward!

#3 Avoid pre-judging people

• Stereo-types• Self-projection• Sweeping generalizations

Part 2: Steps and structures for emotional health

‘Starting clean’ with people

• Helps protect our heart• Prevents unnecessary stress• Promotes grace and peace• Builds harmony in the church

[Part 2: Steps and structures for emotional health

Let’s have a Jesus ministry!Let’s build an emotionally healthy church!

JESUS & E.Q.A Biblical and Pastoral study