8 Writing Tips - Skills

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7/29/13 8 writing tips - Skills - IB English A: Language & Literature

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This lesson focuses on eight ways to invigorate your writing style. These tips will

come in handy for all written activities that you do, from essay writing to creative

writing. They help you meet the third aim of Group 1 courses in the IB Diploma, which

states that students are to "develop powers of expression, both in oral and written

communication."

In order to meet this objective, you will compare and contrast two letters of

application. The second letter is an improvement on the first. Then you will find

examples of these 8 tips in the improvements.

Eight ways to improve your writing

Read these following 8 tips on how to improve your writing and search for examples of them in the improved letter below.

8 ways to improve your writing

1. Clauses at the beginning of a sentence: good idea, but avoid really long ones.

There is nothing more boring than a series of sentences that all start with the subject of the sentence:

Instead of: "I train dogs. The animal shel ter hires me. I do this every weekend."

Try: "As part of my weekend job at the animal shelter, I train dogs ."

While clauses at the beginnings of sentences are great, you can have too much of a good thing. Avoid really long

clauses at the beginning of a sentence:

Instead of: "Every day, as I walk to work and pas s the kiosk, where they sell those delicious chocolate bars, I stop t

buy one."

Try: "Every day on my way to work, I stop to buy one of those delicious chocolate bars that they sell at the kios k."

2. Avoid 'it' as the subject of a sentence.

Sentences that start with 'it' or dummy subjects, such as 'there is...' or 'there are...', are quite weak.

Instead of: "It is often the case that mobile phones end up on the lunch trays after the meal."

Try: "Mobile phones often end up on the lunch trays after the meal."

Sentences that start with 'there is..' or 'there are... often have a 'who' or 'which' that follow. These can be cleaned up as

follows:

Instead of: "There is this guy at school who always annoys me."

Try: "This guy at school always annoys me."

3. Use the right verb tense.

This may come more naturally for native speakers of English. Nevertheless, many people make mis takes in the ver

tense that they use. Be sure to know when to use each tense, such as the present s imple, the present perfect, etc.

Instead of: "I am attending this school since 2010."

Try: "I have attendedthis school since 2010" (the present perfect).

4. Use (relative) clauses.

Using clauses in general is a good idea, as we saw in the first tip. Using relative clauses, which expand on ideasfurther (like this one), are also a good idea. Relative clauses make us e of words s uch as 'which', 'who' and 'where'

Instead of: "I have a new job. I enjoy it a lot."

Try: "I have a new job, which I enjoy a lot."

5. Watch out for wordy sentences.

It is good to read and reread your own work. Often times during sel f-evaluation, you see s entences that are not clea

or 'run on'. Wordy sentences can be cleaned up with punctuation and parallel cons tructions (Tip 7).

Instead of: "If everyone in the building were to just clean up their own garbage and if they just sorted it properly then

the recycle man wouldn't have to go through everything, then we wouldn't have to pay extra fees for this service."

Try: "If everyone in the building disposed of his or her own waste in the proper recycle bins , then we would not hav

extra expenses."

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6. Never start a sentence with 'But'.

Although you may see sentences that start with 'But' in other works, you should avoid starting sentences with it fo

academic purposes.

Instead of: "The character displays a lot of courage. But she fails to save the day."

Try: "Although the character displays a lot of courage, she fails to save the day."

7. Use parallelisms.

Parallelisms are sentences or phrases that contain parallel syntactical structures. These usually contain lists o

noun phrases or clauses with sim ilar s tructure. For example: "I decided not to (1) use PowerPoint, (2) read notecard

or (3) mem orize a script." Notice how ideas 1-3 all contain a verb and an object. They all line up nicely in parallel.

Instead of: "I brushed the children's teeth and then I read a book to them. They climbed under the covers and I tuckedthem in."

Try: "I brushed the children's teeth, read them a book and tucked them in."

8. Use active verbs.

In persuasive and academic writing and speaking, active verbs sound much stronger than passive verbs. Passive

verb phrases use the verb 'to be' and the past participle of another verb. For example "The hous e was built by me.

The active form of this phrase would be: "I built the house."

Instead of: "The novel has been criticized by feminis ts."

Try: "Feminists have criticized the novel"

Compare and contrast letters

Here are two letters of application. The second letter is a corrected version of the first. Look at the teacher's underlined

corrections and comm ent on how the sentenced have been improved. The underlined phrases and words relate to the 8 tip

that you have just studied. Explain how each of the 8 tips are done well in the 'corrected letter' and poorly in the 'origina

letter'.

Compare and contrast two letters of application

Tip from the poor letter from the corrected letter

Dont have too

many clauses atthe beginning of a

sentence.

[Hide] Over the past six years, each morning, as soon as my

students walk in the door I am so happy to see them againand see my class room take on life again.

[Hide] Each morning for the

past six years, I have beenhappy to see my students walk

through the class room door.

Avoid 'it' as the

subject of a

sentence.

[Hide] It feels so natural to me to be a primary school teacher.

[Hide] Being a primary school

teacher comes so naturally to

me.

Use the right verb

tense. (Use

present perfect

with for x amount

of time)

[Hide] Yet for the past few months I am longing for and

thinking about a new personal challenge.

[Hide] Nevertheless for the

past few months I have been

contemplating a new personal

challenge.

Use (relative)

clauses, such as

who, where, or

which.

[Hide] ..it is a relatively young international school and I would

like to be a member of a pioneering and ambitious team.

[Hide] it is a relatively young,

international school, where I

could be part of a pioneering

and ambitious team.

Watch out for

wordy sentences.

[Hide] Last, I value the fact that the experience of living in

Amsterdam and the Netherlands are being used and added to

within the multicultural setting of your school, as I think this city

and als o the Dutch culture have much to offer

[Hide] I also like the fact it is a

Dutch subsidised school with

competitive fees and open

doors to a variety of students.
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Never start a

sentence with

but.

[Hide] But in view of my university education, teaching

secondary school students might be a future job possibility to

me.

[Hide] In view of my university

education, teaching in the

secondary school might be a

future poss ibility as well.

Parallel structures[Hide] I am an open minded person with excellent social

skills . I tolerate pressure easily.

[Hide] As a colleague you will

find that I have an open mind,

good social skills and an

ability to handle pressure

easily.

Use active verbs

instead of pass ive

verbs.

[Hide] ..value would be added value to your organisation by...[Hide] I would add value to your

organisation.

Original letter

[Hide]

Dear Ms X,

Over the past six years, each morning, as s oon as m y students walk in the door I am so happy to see them again and seemy classroom take on life again; It feels so natural to me to be a primary school teacher. Yet for the past few months I am

longing for and thinking about a new personal challenge in the field of primary education. As I am very much intrigued by

different cultures and languages I have decided to s tart looking for a pos ition at an international school.

Your school attracted my attention, as it is a relatively young international school and I would like to be member of a

pioneering and ambitious team. I also like the fact it is a Dutch subsidised school with competitive fees, so it is open to a

very broad variety of students. Last, I value the fact that the experience of living in Amsterdam and the Netherlands are being

used and added to wi thin the multicultural setting of your school, as I think this city and also the Dutch culture have m uch t

offer.

Initially I am interested in positions in groups 3-8. To me, children of these ages are still very spontaneous and eager to

learn and at the same time able to communicate and discuss well. But in view of my university education, teaching

secondary school students might be a future job poss ibility to me.

I am an open minded person with excellent social skills. I tolerate pressure easily. Group management, organising and

planning is natural to me. I graduated at an outstanding technical university and worked several years as an consulting

engineer and groupleader in the field of logistics and general management. This way I developed my rational, analytical and

coordinating skills . Then I decided to really follow my heart and pass ion and became a primary school teacher.

I believe value would be added to your organisation with my skills and enthusiasm and I would very much appreciate to b

interviewed so that we could discuss m ore about the job description, my motivation and sui tability.

Yours sincerely,

Candidate Y

Corrected letter

[Hide]

Dear X,

Each morning for the past six years, I have been happy to see my students walk through the classroom door. Being a

primary school teacher comes naturally to me. Nevertheless for the past few months I have been contemplating a new

personal challenge in the field of primary education. As I am very much intrigued by different cultures and languages , I have

decided look for a position at an international school.

Your school caught my attention because it is a relatively young, international school, where I could be a member of a

pioneering and ambitious team. I also like the fact it is a Dutch subsid ised school with competitive fees, open to a variety o
http://www.englishalanglit-inthinking.co.uk/#http://www.englishalanglit-inthinking.co.uk/#http://www.englishalanglit-inthinking.co.uk/#http://www.englishalanglit-inthinking.co.uk/#http://www.englishalanglit-inthinking.co.uk/#http://www.englishalanglit-inthinking.co.uk/#http://www.englishalanglit-inthinking.co.uk/#http://www.englishalanglit-inthinking.co.uk/#


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students. Furthermore, I appreciate how your school brings the multicultural atmosphere of Amsterdam into the school.

Initially I am interested in teaching groups 3-8. To me, children of these ages are still very spontaneous , eager to learn and

able to communicate. In view of my university education, teaching in the secondary school might be a future possib ility as

well.

As a col league you wil l find that I have an open mind, good social skills and an abil ity to handle pressure eas ily. Group

management, organising and planning come naturally to me. I graduated from an outstanding technical university and

worked for several years as a consulting engineer and groupleader in the field of logistics and general management

Through this I developed my rational, analytical and management skills. Then I decided to follow my heart and pass ion and

become a primary school teacher.

I believe I would add value to your organisation with my skills and enthusiasm. I would very much appreciate the opportunit

to discuss the possibi lity of working together soon.

Yours sincerely,

Candidate Y

Apply these tips to your classmates' work

You can divide the class up into 8 'expert groups', where each group focuses on one tip. After everyone has written a rough

draft of a written assignment, you can circulate them through each group, checking for your particular area of focus, or 'tip'.

Tags: essay , commentary , tips , writing

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8 Writing Tips - Skills