45 Mistakes That Brides Make

Avoid These Common Mistakes for Your Big Day

by Emily Baxter

45 Mistakes That Brides MakeCopyright © 2015 by Emily Baxter

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form by any electronic or mechanical means including photocopying, recording, or information storage and retrieval without permission in writing from the author.

Printed in U.S.A

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Table of ContentsIntroduction .............................................................................................9Why Listen to Me? ..................................................................................9Chapter 1 .............................................................................................. 11You Just Got Engaged! Now What? ................................................. 11Chapter 2 .............................................................................................. 15Choosing Bridesmaids, Buying the Dress, and Getting Everyone Together ............................................................................................... 15Chapter 3 .............................................................................................. 19Don’t Forget the Details .................................................................... 19One Month Before Your Wedding .................................................... 19One Week Before Your Wedding ...................................................... 21Chapter 4 .............................................................................................. 23Wedding Day Goofs ........................................................................... 23Chapter 5 .............................................................................................. 27It’s Not Over After You Say, “I Do.” ................................................. 27Conclusion ............................................................................................ 29

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IntroductionWhy Listen to Me?

If you’ve just gotten engaged, you’re probably already getting a lot of advice on what you should and shouldn’t do leading up to your wedding. You’re probably also wondering why you should listen to me about planning it, right? Well, over the years, I’ve done a lot more than just clean and preserve wedding dresses. I’ve also worked with brides and wedding planners to ensure that they had their dresses cleaned and pressed perfectly, and I’ve heard a lot of horror stories.

From dresses that got soiled the day of the wedding and dresses that fell apart in closets in the years after the wedding to guests with hurt feelings, bridesmaids with terrible dresses, and guests who never made it to the venue…I’ve heard it all!

Over the years, I’ve compiled quite a list of these stories, and I’ve dispensed a lot of advice based on my own experiences and those I’ve heard from my bridal clients. That’s where this list of 45 mistakes that brides make comes from. These are the most common and potentially disastrous mistakes that I see brides make every day, and if you can avoid them you’ll have a much more fun and memorable day.

I’ve written this book to help you get on the right track to plan your wedding without a lot of drama or stress. Shall we get started?

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Chapter 1You Just Got Engaged! Now What?

You’ve met the love of your life. You’ve built a solid, loving relationship, and you’ve shared so many memories along the way. Now he’s popped the question, and you said yes. Congratulations!

As the initial elation starts to wear off, though, you’re probably going to start to feel at least a little bit overwhelmed. You have a whole wedding to plan! Where do you even start? This is where most brides make their very first mistakes.

1. Going Straight to Facebook with Your AnnouncementFirst of all, yes, we live in the Digital Age, but that doesn’t

mean that everyone needs to find out about your engagement on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, or Snapchat. Before you post a picture of the ring to social media, call your family and closest friends and tell them that you have great news. If you can, make the announcement in person, but over the phone works for family and friends who live far away.

Taking this step before you change your Facebook status will make your loved ones feel special, and you won’t have to worry about your mum finding out that you’re engaged on Instagram.

2. Comparing Rings

There’s always going to be someone with a bigger, sparklier, and all-around more expensive ring on her finger. If you start comparing your ring to the rings you see on your friends’, family members’, and co-workers’ fingers, you’re going to drive yourself crazy. Getting ring envy is a great way to make yourself miserable, so forget about what others are wearing and focus on the beautiful ring that your future husband chose with love for you.

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3. Diving into Planning Before You Know What You WantOne of the first things most brides-to-be do when they have

a ring on their finger is to dive straight into Pinterest boards, wedding magazines, and “planning” with their friends and family. Stop right there. All of that stuff is going to be a lot more fun and a lot less stressful if you take the time to reflect on the kind of wedding you want, the essentials you need, and the details that you’ve always dreamed of first. Remember, it’s your day.

4. Glossing Over the BudgetOnce you’ve figured out your vision for your wedding, it’s

time to sit down and hash out your budget. You can pull off your wedding on a shoestring, or you can pour as much cash as you want into a huge, lavish affair. It’s really up to you and what you’re comfortable with spending, but you absolutely must create a budget that covers every detail. From flowers and catering to choosing experts like Jeeves Dry Cleaners to clean and preserve your gown afterward, the more detailed you are with your budget planning, the smoother everything will run.

5. Forgetting About Your GuestsThis one might sound odd, as you’ll no doubt be poring over

your guest list to ensure that you’ve invited everyone who should be there. The thing is, though, you can’t just invite them and forget about them until your wedding day. Are you going to have people travelling from out of town for your wedding? Do you know where they’ll be staying and how they’ll get to and from the venue?

These details are incredibly important, and a lot of brides forget about them until the very last minute. Then there’s a huge scramble to take care of everyone, and things can get really messy.

6. Buying the Dress First

I know, I know, buying the dress is one of the most exciting parts of planning your wedding. You’ve been dreaming of your wedding day your entire life, and buying the dress makes it all feel more real as the big

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day approaches. Plus, your dress is likely going to be one of your biggest expenses, so you’ll want to know how much of your budget is taken up with your wedding dress before you move forward with other plans.

Here’s the thing, though – your dress isn’t a standalone piece. Before you book appointments with your favourite local bridal shops to try on dresses, consider your venue and the style of ceremony and reception you’ll be throwing. You don’t want your dress to look out of place at your venue, and you don’t want to waste everyone’s time trying on a more casual dress if you decide to book a more formal affair later on. So, before you start shopping for your dress, start shopping for venues, caterers, and/or decorators.

7. Not Hiring a Wedding PlannerAccording to Forbes, event planning was number five on the

list of most stressful jobs in 2014. And yet, so many brides try to take this job on themselves, all while maintaining their own jobs and trying not to turn into total bridezillas.

I’m not saying that you absolutely need to hire a wedding planner from day one. In fact, you can probably do most of the early planning yourself, including booking your venue, choosing your caterer, vendors, DJ, etc. However, let’s skip ahead for a moment, to the week before your wedding. Are you organized enough to coordinate all of these people and services?

A lot of brides don’t know that they can actually hire a wedding planner or coordinator to work with them during the last week before the wedding (or even just on the big day itself). If you want to arrive at the altar feeling fresh, beautiful, and without all of the stress of being your own wedding planner, consider getting some last-minute coordination help.

Now that we’ve gone over some of the most common mistakes that brides make when they first get engaged, let’s talk about what to avoid when you’re choosing your bridesmaids, buying the dress, and getting everyone together to plan your big day…

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Chapter 2Choosing Bridesmaids, Buying the

Dress, and Getting Everyone Together These next mistakes can

be really tricky. These are the moments in planning your wedding when people’s feelings can get hurt and when you may end up forgetting some of the most important details for your big day. Pay close attention to these and you’ll be able to avoid a lot of anxiety, tears, and stress leading up to your wedding.

8. Shopping for Your Dress Before You Choose Your Bridesmaids

We know, we know! You really want to start shopping for your wedding dress. You’ve been dreaming of this gorgeous gown since you were a little girl. Even if you know exactly which dress you want and you have everything planned out already (right down to getting it preserved by wedding dress experts like the ones at Jeeves Dry Cleaners), you need to be just a little bit patient.

Shopping for your gown can be a great bonding experience between you, your mum, your future mother-in-law, and your bridesmaids, but you won’t get that experience if you don’t wait. So choose your bridesmaids and set a shopping date.

9. Failing to Ask If Your Friends Want to Be Your Bridesmaids

Some brides just assume that all their friends would love to be their bridesmaids, but that’s not always the case. So, when choosing who you want to stand beside you at the altar, make a list of your closest friends and then ask each of them if they would do you the honour of being your bridesmaid. Do it with plenty of time to spare so that everyone can clear their schedules and so that you can ask other friends if anyone can’t make it.

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10. Putting Yourself and Your Bridesmaids on a Crash Diet

Next, we know that you want to look amazing at your wedding, and we know you want all of your bridesmaids to look great, too, but don’t pull this classic bridezilla move. If you’re concerned about fitting into your wedding dress, start easing your way into a healthier, leaner meal plan and more active lifestyle six months to a year before your wedding. You’ll be much more likely to succeed at your weight loss goals, and you won’t have to starve yourself for a month before the big day.

As for your bridesmaids, let them worry about their own diets and dress sizes. They’re grown women, and they’ll look great in the dresses you choose for them…which brings us to our next big mistake…

11. Not Thinking of Your Bridesmaids When You Choose Their Dresses

The final decision on your bridesmaids’ dresses will be up to you. After all, it’s your day, but do you really want to choose ill-fitting, unflattering dresses for your best friends to wear for your wedding? Think of your bridesmaids’ body types and skin tones before you select the dresses. You may even want to choose a single designer and colour but then allow your bridesmaids to choose their own cuts. That’s a good way to make everyone happy with their dresses.

12. Not Listening to Your MumMoving on from bridesmaids and dresses, let’s talk about your

mum’s roll in all of this. You don’t have to take all of her advice or do everything she says, but you should take time to listen to her. Let her relive her wedding day a little bit through you as you plan together. She might give you a great idea for your “something old” on the big day.

13. Forgetting to Send Out Save-the-DatesOne of the first things you should do once you’ve announced

your engagement and talked with your family about the big event is to set the date. As soon as you’ve done this, you should get your guest list together and send out save-the-date cards. These aren’t

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official invitations, as they won’t need RSVPs and won’t have information about your menu, but they’re a good way to ensure that your guests have time to clear their calendars and make travel arrangements.

14. Sending Out Invitations Too Late

Even if you send out save-the-dates right after you get engaged, you can still mess up by sending invitations out at the very last minute. Remember, you need to give everyone time to RSVP, so don’t wait until a couple of weeks before the wedding. Ask your vendors how much notice they’ll need to ensure that everyone gets the right menu items, how many beverages to supply, etc.

15. Forgetting to Feed Your VendorsWhile we’re on the subject of giving your vendors what they

need, if they’re going to be on site during your wedding, you need to ensure that you provide food and beverages to keep them energized and ready to do their jobs. Be especially mindful of your photographer and your DJ to make sure they’re well fed and hydrated to take great pictures and keep your guests dancing throughout the reception.

16. Not Calling Ahead When Dress ShoppingWhen it comes time to go shopping for your dress, you might

not want to take the whole wedding party with you (if you have a lot of bridesmaids and/or they live in different places), but you’ll definitely want to take your mum and mother-in-law, as well as your maid of honour and one or two other close friends. But don’t surprise the bridal shops when you go. Instead, plan ahead and make appointments so that you’ll get the best service and the most time to shop.

17. Planning Your Reception Hours after Your WeddingAs you plan how you’ll get everyone together, where the wedding

will be, where the reception will be, and all of the other details,

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think of the schedule for the day of your wedding. If you’re having a daytime wedding, you don’t want to schedule your reception for late in the evening. If you do that, some of your guests will wander off and never come back, while others will stick around but will be bored and hungry until they can get into the reception venue. Starting a reception with a bunch of grumpy guests sounds like a pretty terrible idea, right? So plan to streamline your ceremony and reception.

18. Buying a Dress That Doesn’t FitAnd here’s the last thing we’ll say about the dress… Don’t buy a

dress that doesn’t fit. This sounds silly, but all too many brides buy a dress that’s too small in hopes that they’ll shrink down before the big day. It’s far better to have a seamstress take your dress in at the last minute than to find out that your dress is too small just days before the wedding. So don’t do any wishful shopping – buy a dress that fits and can be altered if you need it.

So now we’ve covered all of the biggest mistakes that brides make leading up to the final days before the wedding. In the next chapter, we’ll talk about those final days and what you should be doing (and avoiding) to make sure that your wedding is a stress-free celebration.

Stop right there. All of that stuff is going to be a lot more fun and

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Chapter 3Don’t Forget the Details

When you get to the last month before your wedding, you have the opportunity to make all the right moves for a wonderful wedding day with all of the elements you’ve been dreaming off. You also have the opportunity to make a lot of really common mistakes that can leave you feeling sick to your stomach on the day of your wedding, wondering how you’re going to pull it all off. The key here, as you approach the final days before you say, “I do,” is to pay close attention to the details.

One Month Before Your Wedding

19. Not Sticking to a ScheduleFirst of all, if you haven’t already gotten the idea from the

previous mistakes we’ve described, you should really be keeping a planning schedule. If you do this, you’ll be able to break up your wedding planning tasks into smaller chunks, and you won’t feel so overwhelmed. At this point, having a schedule will make everything seem like it’s falling into place, not falling apart. Be sure to stick to the schedule now more than ever, though. Falling behind can be disastrous at this point.

20. Waiting to Choose Your VendorsIf you’re a month out from your wedding day and you haven’t

booked a DJ or band, a photographer, and/or other vendors, you’re flirting with disaster. Not only are you giving yourself more things to do leading up to your wedding, but the likelihood that the vendors you want will be booked goes up significantly as you get closer to your wedding day.

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21. Not Protecting Your Wedding DressWhen your dress arrives, you don’t want to just hang it up

in a closet and forget about it until your wedding. That’s a great way to ensure that something happens to it and that it somehow gets stained or discoloured. To prevent any damage to your dress before your wedding day and on the day of your wedding, take it to Jeeves Dry Cleaners to have it professionally treated with Scotchgard.

22. Forgetting to Go Cake Shopping Until the Last MinuteIt might sound weird, but a lot of brides get so caught up with

the other details that they’ll actually forget to schedule a cake tasting and plan a special cake in time for their cake artist to make the perfect creation. So don’t put off your cake shopping.

23. Waiting to Write Your VowsYou see this in the movies all the time. The bride and groom

get closer and closer to the date, and one or the other of them just can’t find the right words to write for their vows. Then, somehow, at the last minute, they come up with the perfect speech to give at the altar… Don’t do it! Waiting to write your vows until the last minute is a great way to end up writing something that sounds rushed and insincere.

24. Not Practicing Your VowsYou might only need a few minutes to rehearse your ceremony

the day before your wedding, but you’ll want to spend a bit more time than that rehearsing your vows. Whether or not you plan on reading or reciting them, you’ll sound more natural and heartfelt when you say them if you practice.

25. Not Getting a Final Pressing for Your GownWhen you go in to have your gown treated by Jeeves Dry

Cleaners, be sure to ask how long you’ll need to leave the dress for its final pressing. Remember, you may be able to steam out some minor wrinkles that happen transporting your dress the day of your wedding, but getting it pressed will ensure that you don’t have a huge wrinkled mess to deal with.

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26. Forgetting About Limo Service for the Wedding Party

Finally, before we move on to what you should be doing (and, again, avoiding) in the last week before your wedding, there’s one more thing to remember in the last month before the big day. Don’t forget to arrange for transportation for the wedding party. This includes transportation for the rehearsal, the rehearsal dinner, the wedding, the reception, and anything you plan to do together afterward. Even if you’re not having a limo or van service taking everyone together, you should ensure that everyone can get to all venues on time.

One Week Before Your Wedding

27. Failing to Follow Up with VendorsIn the last week before your wedding, you should first make

sure that you’ve followed up with all of your vendors and that they all have everything they need from you. They should know the schedule, what to bring, etc., and you should be assured that you’ve done everything on your end (paying deposits, giving venue addresses, etc.) to make sure that they can move forward.

28. Not Keeping in Touch with Your Wedding PlannerOn the same note, if you hire a wedding planner to help you

in the last days leading up to your wedding, don’t make everyone’s lives more difficult by losing touch with them. Be as communicative as possible and make sure that they know all of the details that they need to help you with.

29. Seating All the Singles TogetherIf you’re going to have assigned seats for dinner, don’t just sit

all of your single friends and family together. Instead, mingle the singles with the couples based on mutual interests and who will get along best with whom. You can still play matchmaker with your place settings if you think that a couple of your guests might hit it off, but don’t just throw them all at the dreaded singles table.

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30. Over-Decorating the Reception Now, take a look at what you have planned for decorating the

reception. Centrepieces for the tables are great, but don’t add a ton of different decorative pieces to the tables, walls, and ceiling. Instead, choose a venue that you love just as it is and add a few personal elements. If you’re not sure about what’s too much, ask your wedding planner. They’ll know what works and what doesn’t.

31. Not Learning to DanceFinally, you don’t have to be a dancing pro for your wedding,

but you do want your first dance to look beautiful and romantic, not like you’re stumbling over each other’s feet. So, agree on your song and dance, and then practice it together at least a few times before the big day. You can even watch some videos on YouTube to help you out if you don’t have the time or budget to get dance lessons.

Okay, now you’ve gotten through the 31 biggest mistakes that brides make leading up to their wedding days. You might be thinking that you’re out of the woods if you can miss these, but the final 14 mistakes – all of which happen on or after your wedding – can all be just as disastrous, so read on!

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Chapter 4Wedding Day Goofs

If you’ve followed our advice leading up to your wedding day, you should wake up the morning of your wedding feeling a bit jittery but ultimately feeling confident and relaxed that everything is in order and ready to go. To keep that feeling throughout the day, avoid these mistakes…

32. Forgetting Breakfast (and Lunch)Before you start getting ready, don’t forget to eat a good

breakfast. You might be feeling some butterflies in your stomach, but you’ll feel much better throughout the day if you eat something hearty now. And, if you’re having an evening wedding, don’t forget to eat lunch, too. You’ll thank us when you don’t feel like passing out from hunger at the altar.

33. Trying Something New with Your MakeupNow, having a professional makeup artist do your makeup is a

real treat, and it’s definitely not something you get to do every day. Because of that, you might be tempted to try something different that you’ve never been able to pull off on your own before. Don’t do it! Stick with the plan, and have your makeup artist do colours that you’ve tried out and liked before.

34. Doing Your Hair Too Early – And Not Communicating with Your Stylist

If your hair is really fine and/or healthy, it’s not going to want to hold curls, so it has a very good chance of falling before you get to the altar. Talk to your stylist about your hair, how it typically holds, and what they can do to help preserve your look until you get to the ceremony. You may be walking around in curlers or hairpins

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all day, but that’ll be much better than getting to your wedding with limp hair.

35. Failing to Pack Extra LipstickNo matter how good your makeup artist is, chances are very

good that you’re going to lick your lipstick off at some point during the day, especially if you have to eat again before the wedding. That won’t be a problem if you don’t forget to pack extra lipstick in the same shade.

36. Not Scheduling Enough Time to Get Dressed and Get to the Venue

If you plan your day too tightly, there’s a good chance that you’ll be late to your own wedding, and no one wants that. So make sure that you have some wiggle room in your schedule.

37. Wearing Shoes You Can’t Stand InIf your gown is long enough, you can get away with just about

any kind of shoes you want. If you have a shorter gown, you may have to worry more about matching. In either case, don’t choose painful shoes that will have you shifting and grimacing throughout your ceremony.

38. You Don’t Make Time to Say Hello to All Your GuestsOne of the biggest complaints a lot of couples have about

their wedding days is that they were starving and never got to eat because they were too busy greeting all of their guests, making toasts, etc. At the same time, a lot of brides and grooms forget to do their guests the honour of saying hello and chatting for a bit. You can fix both problems by scheduling the meal at the beginning of the reception and then making time to say hello to everyone.

39. Forgetting about Impromptu SpeechesYou should also remember that your best man, maid of honour,

and parents aren’t the only ones who will want to make speeches at your reception. Don’t schedule it so tightly that one or two other guests can’t step up to the microphone and tell a funny story or two.

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40. Not Getting the First Dance on Film

Whether you have a photographer or videographer on hand, don’t forget to talk to them before the reception about capturing the first dance. Most wedding photographers are really good about this, but you’ll want to make sure that you’re on the same page…because you’re definitely not going to be worrying about pictures or videos while you’re dancing with your new husband for the first time.

If you avoid these mistakes, you should have no trouble getting through and thoroughly enjoying your wedding. Of course, it’s not over yet. You still have a few details to take care of after you say, “I do.”

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Chapter 5It’s Not Over After You Say, “I Do.”

Finally, before you take off on your honeymoon, take a look through these last five common bridal mistakes…

41. Not Leaving Enough in the Budget for the

HoneymoonWhen you and your husband

budgeted for your wedding, did you leave yourselves flat broke without thinking about honeymoon expenses? You don’t have to go on your honeymoon right after your wedding, but you should keep it in mind when you do your budgeting.

42. Failing to Get Insurance on Your Rings Before You Leave for Your Honeymoon

Travelling can be risky. If you lose your wedding or engagement ring while you’re away from home, chances are high that you won’t find it again. Getting insurance is a great way to avert this disaster.

43. Putting Your Rings in Harm’s WayAt the same time, don’t go out of your way to put your rings in

danger of being lost or damaged. Take them off when you’re doing dishes or when you’re going surfing or rock climbing.

44. Sending Out Late Thank-You NotesYou don’t have to send your thank-you notes out the minute

your guests leave your reception. In fact, it’s customary to wait until you get back from your honeymoon. However, you might want to change things up a bit if you’re waiting a few months for your trip. Send out thank-you notes in a timely fashion to show your guests you’re so happy that they were a part of your day.

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45. Forgetting to Have Your Dress PreservedLast but certainly not least, a lot of brides put their wedding

gowns in dress bags and forget about them for years. That can lead to your dress getting damaged beyond repair. So don’t forget to take it to an expert at wedding dress preservation like Jeeves Dry Cleaners to ensure that it will look just as beautiful as the day you got married for years to come.

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ConclusionThere you go – 45 mistakes

that brides make and that you can avoid for a better wedding day. These obviously aren’t the only details you’ll need to remember for your big day, but they’ll certainly get you started toward a stress-free and wonderful day that you’ll look back on with fondness for the rest of your life. Just remembering to stick to your schedule, to consult with your wedding planner, and to eat a good breakfast on your wedding day will get you a long way toward that goal, and following the rest of the tips here will help you avoid a lot of mishaps leading up to, during, and after your wedding.

Then, after all is said and done, your dress will be beautifully preserved, thanks to Jeeves Dry Cleaners. And, if you have a daughter someday, you’ll be able to give her your perfectly preserved wedding dress for her special day, too.

Congratulations, and good luck!