11-25-2012 Gratitude in Poetry and Music

THE BOWL SINGS

WELCOME

Good morning and Welcome to the Boulder Valley Unitarian Universalist Fellowship. My name is [Larry Laverdure]

No matter your age, your size, or the size of your hair, you are welcome here.

No matter if prefer white or dark turkey meat, ham or tofurkey,you are welcome here.

No matter if you say you guys, y’all or ustedes, you are welcome here.

No matter whom you call family or what holidays you celebrateyou are welcome here.

Whether you come with laughter in your heart or tears, you are welcome here.

If you come here with an open mind, a loving heart and willing hands, you are welcome here, and we are grateful you came.

I extend a special welcome to all visitors today, and hope that you find here a place that both nurtures your spirit and inspires you to help heal our world. If you are new to our Fellowship, and haven’t already done so, please stop by our Welcome Table at the East entrance to the building or at the Opportunities table after the service. We hope you’ll find meaningful ways to engage your heart, mind and soul here. All are invited to stay for coffee and conversation following the service.

Each month, the Fellowship hosts an informal ‘chat’ for anyone wishing to learn more about the Fellowship or Unitarian Univeralism. This next month, it will be December 16 after the second service. We’ll meet here on the dias, following the second service coffee hour, and then go back to a quieter space to talk.

It is our practice to give ½ of our plate away each Sunday to groups that help bring our values into the world. Today’s ½ plate will go to the Family Learning Center.

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You can read more about them in your order of service. I’d like to introduce Brenda Lyle from Family Learning Center who is with us today. You can learn more about their group during Unity Plaza.

We like to get to know all of our newcomers. If you are new and would like to do so, I invite you to stand and introduce yourself so that we might better get to know you following our service. Are there any new people that would like to introduce themselves?

Following introductions, bring bowl out from around the pulpit

May the sound of the bowl draw you deeper into the present moment.

Ring the Bowl again.

PRELUDE “Reverie” Op. 39, No. 21 by Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky Opening Words (Sarah): [Today’s opening words come to us from the poet Wendell Berry]

What We Need Is HereGeese appear high over us,pass, and the sky closes. Abandon,as in love or sleep, holdsthem to their way, clearin the ancient faith: what we needis here. And we pray, notfor new earth or heaven, but to bequiet in heart, and in eye,clear. What we need is here.

Thank you for being here, you are part of the “here” that we each need. May we find a place to quiet our hearts here, a place where our eyes might learn to see clearly. Like geese, may we fly together now and then, guided and guiding. Open

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your hearts and minds to our worship today as we are filled by music and words and silence and the knowledge that what we need is indeed here. HYMN “We Give Thanks” #1010

CHALICE LIGHTING

FOR ALL AGES “The Giving Tree” by Shel Silverstein (Sarah or ???)

HYMN “Go Now in Peace” Go Now in Peace, go now in peace

May the spirit of Love surround you, everywhere, everywhere, you may go

CANDLES OF COMMUNITY Please limit your sharing to brief, personal joys & concerns.

PASTORAL PRAYER Sarah Oglesby-Dunegan, Ministerial Intern

I open today’s prayer with a poem from Palestinian poet Naomi Shihab Nye, knowing that the recent escalation of violence in the Middle East is cause for concern and for some of us a more personal sorrow.

How Long Peace Takes, by Naomi Shihab Nye

As long as a mirror opening its eyeto stretch a room lengthwise

As long as the slow crawl of loosening paintand the bending of slim wax tapers

As long as blue thread spinning a vine of birds up one seam down the otherand the bodice don’t forget the bodice

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doubly thick with wings and hidden treasure

As long as Sitti twists her hankyaround two small gold coinsin the bed in the bedand says she is not tired

As long as the bedand all the people who who slept in it

As long as the splitting of almondsthe stirring of lentilsthe scent of marimeaand the Universal Laundry

As long as the question--what if I were you--has two heads

As long as the back of the skull isvulnerable and the temple and the chest

As long as anyone feels exemptor better and one pain is separatefrom another and people are pressed flat in any place

And longer

If every day the soldier slapsanother cousin’s face

Spirit of life, come unto each of us. Sing in our hearts all the stirrings of compassion. Blow in the wind, rise in the sea; move in the hand giving life the shape of justice; spirit of life come to us, come to us. [quiet time]

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HYMN “There is More Love Somewhere” #95 READINGS and REFLECTIONS [Poems: pause for 30 seconds between readingsInvite people to listen for a word, phrase or idea that calls to them] The Fountain Don't say, don't say there is no waterto solace the dryness at our hearts.I have seen the fountain springing out of the rock walland you drinking there. And I toobefore your eyes found footholds and climbedto drink the cool water. The woman of that place, shading her eyes,frowned as she watched-but not becauseshe grudged the water, only because she was waitingto see we drank our fill and wererefreshed. Don't say, don't say there is no water.That fountain is there among its scallopedgreen and gray stones, it is still there and always therewith its quiet song and strange powerto spring in us,

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up and out through the rock.~ Denise Levertov ~ What brings solace to your heart?How do we find the courage to climb to the fountain that will renew us?Who/what witnesses our thirst and yearnings? **********************************************************I find many things that bring me solace, and find that my heart becomes dry when I forget to include these ingredients in the meal that is my life. My heart becomes dry sometimes when I have too many things scheduled, and not enough time for reflection. Sometimes, it becomes dry when I have listened to news of war and shared problems, and not remembered to add a helping of what’s right in the world. I find solace in time spent at the park or walking with friends, in a good book, and in beautiful music. I find solace in poetry and a fire in the fireplace. I also find solace in knowing that I am not alone in seeking the fountain of renewal, that others have thirsty hearts as well. There is something lovely in coming here, to this Fountain known as a Fellowship, and finding each of you here as well, and in knowing that we seek together to quench our thirst and be renewed. We are part of each other’s healing, even as we may only be witness to one another. I find the courage to get here, to this place of healing, from my sense of being held in Love by your collective hearts, and my sense that there is something more and something greater…there is more love somewhere…come and drink from this fountain and you shall taste it.

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Just NowIn the morning as the storm begins to blow awaythe clear sky appears for a moment and it seems to methat there has been something simpler than I could ever believesimpler than I could have begun to find words fornot patient not even waiting no more hiddenthan the air itself that became part of me for a whilewith every breath and remained with me unnoticedsomething that was here unnamed unknown in the daysand the nights not separate from themnot separate from them as they came and were goneit must have been here neither early nor late thenby what name can I address it now holding out my thanks

W. S. Merwin What has become a part of you that you have forgotten is there? Do you have a name for that which heals and clarifies in your life? How do you know it when you see it/experience it? What do you feel grateful for right now? How do you share your gratitude? On the other side of my life’s storms I have found that I am my own best resource and that I live in a web of interdependent relationships. When I can remain open and willing, there are many possibilities and many opportunities, just not always the ones I was looking for. You know the line from the movie Finding Nemo, “just keep swimming?” Sometimes life is as simple as that. Just keep swimming. I also return to the movie “Grand Canyon” where the characters discover they are invisibly connected in ways they weren’t always aware of but which ultimately have salvific significance—we may accidentally save each other’s lives over and over again.

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Whether you believe there is ultimate significance to these connections and you call this the work of God or whether you simply revel in the experience of beauty in being connected, I find that letting go of my need to “know” how it will all work out and having faith in the process of life usually yields a clear sky and healing opportunities. We are so trained to “know” that the simple act of living into the moment feels complicated to us sometimes.

I also see that the level of trauma we have experienced is directly connected to our struggles with this kind of “faith” and our access to an experience of wholeness. Sometimes we must anchor ourselves in someone who has made it through what is challenging and painful to us—this is like the model of sponsoring someone in AA and other support groups. I may not have anything visible or tangible in my life that tells me that there are clear skies somewhere in my future, but if I trust you and you tell me there will be, perhaps I can hold on long enough to see them. All kinds of recovery work—whether we have lived through personal violence, poverty, war, dysfunctional relationships, mental illness or the many other challenges we face to health and security—depends on our ability to connect to other people and communities that are interdependent rather than co-dependent, that support us in our healing process and offer solace and resources.

While we may be helped by a spiritual practice, or supported by our beliefs about the universe and how it supports us, ultimately it is a healthy, interdependent community that shares unconditional regard for us as people that truly aids the healing process.

The gratitude piece of this is both simple and complicated. In the movie Grand Canyon, the main character tries to thank a man who saved his life by inviting friendship and deeper relationship where there would otherwise be only a passing relationship. He wants to acknowledge the impact of another man on his life and he feels that the universe has connected them for a deeper purpose that he needs to discover. And while we may not become close friends with every tow truck driver that rescues us, we certainly can allow those moments where we are

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in relationship to be more than transactional episodes. I invite you to consider at least three people here in this community that you feel gratitude for and to find a way to thank them; do the same for your family; and then perhaps in the wider community. I wonder whether this will also be a way to quench a thirsty heart?

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The Peace of Wild Things

When despair for the world grows in meand I wake in the night at the least soundin fear of what my life and my children's lives may be,I go and lie down where the wood drakerests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds.I come into the peace of wild thingswho do not tax their lives with forethoughtof grief. I come into the presence of still water.And I feel above me the day-blind starswaiting with their light. For a timeI rest in the grace of the world, and am free.— Wendell Berry

What fears do you face for your life and that of your children or the children of the world? What is the still water in your life? What is the “peace of wild things” for you and when have you experienced it?

Of course, I find many opportunities to feel despair for the world—it seems like the news is full of stories that have the power to cause despair and lament. Additionally, my work and my attention have often been drawn to what is broken in the world, to individuals and communities in need and sometimes the brokenness is overwhelming. (Amen).

Sometimes the brokenness is overwhelming. I particularly remember how I felt when visiting El Salvador. Our group was staying with a non-profit organization that delivered health care and social services to the most needy in their area. We

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traveled with them to a large waste dump in which thousands of families were living, relying on the thrown out materials to make homes and to make a living in salvage. If ever I have despaired humanity’s purpose on this planet and our ability to find salvation in this life, it is when I walked through this burning chemical hell. With no regulations, incompatible wastes were thrown overwhere, and some came from outside El Salvador. With no other way to make a living, families living here had so little it was hard to see how they found meaning enough to survive. We could barely walk through the area, our eyes burning from the smoke and its contents. Residents were afraid of outsiders and ashamed of their lives and livelihood. This was a blessing and a curse; I feel like I had the chance to look behind a veil and understand something about my world, that though painful, would forever change me. I am reminded that I would never have met those families if someone hadn’t been reaching out to them and trying to change things. I am also reminded that the waste of my first world life shows up in the lives of others, for better and definitely for worse. The peace of wild things for me is found in ordinary walks in town as well as those special times I am camping or hiking or exploring a more wild area. It is the peace of a cat in my lap, of a bird on my sill, of a plant I have grown in my own garden. It is in my compost heap and in the breeze from my bike. It is in trees. My awareness of my ability to create the experience of pain through forethought of pain is a reminder to me that I can choose. I can choose what to make something mean and I can choose how I will respond to people, situations, to my environment. The choices I make have powerful consequences for me, for my family, for my community, and ultimately the world. The grace I experience comes with the freedom and the knowledge of this powerful choice and is also in a knowledge that refuge is there when I need it. As a chaplain I re-discovered Psalm 46, and although I am not a theist in any traditional sense, it does speak to my experience of the world:

Psalm 46[a]

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For the director of music. Of the Sons of Korah. According to alamoth.[b] A song.

1 God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.2 Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,3 though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging.[c]4 There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God, the holy place where the Most High dwells.5 God is within her, she will not fall; God will help her at break of day.6 Nations are in uproar, kingdoms fall; he lifts his voice, the earth melts.7 The LORD Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress.8 Come and see what the LORD has done, the desolations he has brought on the earth.9 He makes wars cease to the ends of the earth.He breaks the bow and shatters the spear; he burns the shields[d] with fire.10 He says, “Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.”11 The LORD Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress. Mindful Every dayI see or hearsomethingthat more or less

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kills mewith delight,that leaves melike a needle in the haystackof light.It was what I was born for -to look, to listen, to lose myselfinside this soft world -to instruct myselfover and over in joy,and acclamation.Nor am I talkingabout the exceptional, the fearful, the dreadful,the very extravagant -but of the ordinary,the common, the very drab, the daily presentations.Oh, good scholar,I say to myself,how can you help but grow wisewith such teachingsas these -

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the untrimmable light of the world,the ocean's shine,the prayers that are madeout of grass?~ Mary Oliver ~ What were you born for? How can we instruct ourselves over and over in joy? What are your prayers made of? Just as so many things can make me cry, so many things make me smile so much I am bursting. When I walk by a grandpa and his little grandchild walking along the sidewalk, I am bursting with joy; When I watch my husband being a great dad or talking about teaching, how he will engage his students in writing and ideas, I am bursting. When I see the full moon, when I hear beautiful music. When I come to church, when someone hugs me. When my daughters tell me stories or laugh. When I see someone helping someone else just because they can. When someone tells me a story from their life, sharing themselves whether a joyful story or painful one, I am bursting with delight and love.

I was born to be a witness, to hold hands and to acknowledge. I was born to write poems and to remember the stories that have been told me. I lose myself in these stories, in the connections, in these shared moments of intimacy. It’s kind of a joke in my family, that my daughter thinks I tell random homeless people my life’s story—which is only true because I also stop to listen to theirs. It’s an exchange of what makes us human, I may not have cash to give but I have ears to listen and a heart to share.

Joy is now and now and now. Accessible over and over. And our joy is connected to our sorrow, deeply intertwined.

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Did you ever read that book, The Giver? The idea of this failed utopia is that it is better to live in a place of emotional numbness, never asking questions, never digging deeper than to know deep pain and suffering. The problem is, as these characters discover, that access to joy is related to access to pain. A narrow range leaves us with little access to either.

Finding joy in the ordinary, finding joy despite great suffering—I believe that sorrow teaches us about joy, and that joy teaches us how to endure sorrow. We must lament in order to have access to praise. We must have a sense that there is something bigger on the other side of our pain. My prayers are made of gratitude and questions; my prayers are made of water and wind, things which cannot be held but which move us anyway. My ocean shine and untrimmable light are right here, what I need is right here. [Blessed Be, Amen]

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OFFERTORY “Clair de Lune” by Claude Debussy

[Larry or Sarah] Our half plate goes to the Family Learning Center. Since 1981 the Family Learning Center has provided Boulder County low-income, culturally diverse children and families the lifelong learning tools for self-sufficiency and success. They believe that family and community offer the best support system for healthy social, academic, civic, and ethical development. We invite you to support the work of the Fellowship and that of the Family Center as we pass our offering baskets and listen to the gifts of Eneida playing Debussy. If you are new or a visitor, we invite you to let the basket pass you by; your presence is gift enough.

POSTLUDE “May Song” Op. 1, No. 3 by Enrique Granados[As Eneida plays one last piece for us, I invite you into a time of reflection and gratitude; may this be chance for you to catch your breath and renew.]

BENEDICTION Sarah Oglesby-Dunegan, Ministerial Intern

[singing: I am saying thank you, I am saying thank you, I am saying thankyou, thank you is my practice]

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