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A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist,

lookedstraight into his eyes, and said,

"I would like to buy some cyanide."

The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you

need cyanide?"The lady replied, "I need it

to poison my husband."

The pharmacist's eyes got big and he

explained, "Lord have mercy! I can't give you

cyanide tokill your husband, that's against the law. I'll lose

my license! They'll throw both of us in jail!

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Allkinds of bad things

will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any

cyanide!"

The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with thepharmacist's wife..... The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "You didn't tell me you had a prescription."

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School A place where Parents pay and children play

Life Insurance A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.

Nurse: A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills

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Marriage It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a

woman gains her masters..

Marriage It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a

woman gains her masters..

Tears The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.

Divorce Future tense of Marriage.

Divorce Future tense of Marriage.

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Lecture An art of transferring information from the notes of the

Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either

"Conference The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

Conference Room A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody

disagrees later on

Lecture An art of transferring information from the notes of the

Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either

"Conference The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

Conference Room A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody

disagrees later on

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Father A banker provided by nature

Criminal A person no different from the rest

....except that he/she got caught

Boss Someone who is early when you are late and late

when you are early

Father A banker provided by nature

Criminal A person no different from the rest

....except that he/she got caught

Boss Someone who is early when you are late and late

when you are early

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DOCTOR A person who holds your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.

Smile A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

DOCTOR A person who holds your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.

Smile A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

Politician One who shakes your hand before elections and

your Confidence after

Politician One who shakes your hand before elections and

your Confidence after

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Yawn The only time some married men ever get

to open their mouth.

Yawn The only time some married men ever get

to open their mouth.

Office A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

Office A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

Etc. A sign to make others believe that you

know more than you actually do.

Etc. A sign to make others believe that you

know more than you actually do.

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Philosopher A fool who torments himself

during life, to be wise

Atom Bomb An invention to end all

inventions.

Committee Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide

that nothing can be done together.

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Marriage is like a public toilet Those waiting outside are desperate to get in & those inside are desperate to come out.

No Man Can Ever Be Satisfiedwith 4 things in life.(1) Mobile(2) Automobile(3) TV(4) WifeBecause there is always a better model in neighborhood.

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Searching these keywords on Google `How to tackle wife?`Google search result, `Good day sir,  Even we are searching`.

A friend recently explained why he refuses to get married. He says the wedding rings look like miniature handcuffs.

Compromising does not mean you are wrong and your wife is right. It only means that the safety of your head is much more important than your ego!

Whisky is a brilliant invention. One double and you start feeling single again.

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Some people turn to God, Some turn to alcohol.  Honestly speaking I

don’t see any difference, both ways life is being guided by a Spirit.

Some people turn to God, Some turn to alcohol.  Honestly speaking I

don’t see any difference, both ways life is being guided by a Spirit.

Pharmacist to customer:  In order to buy migraine pills, Sir, you need a proper prescription. A picture of

your ‘wife’ is just not enough

Pharmacist to customer:  In order to buy migraine pills, Sir, you need a proper prescription. A picture of

your ‘wife’ is just not enough

Having a wife is part of living. But having girlfriend along

with wife is “Art of Living”.

Having a wife is part of living. But having girlfriend along

with wife is “Art of Living”.

Funny quote on a husband's T-Shirt: All girls are devils, but my

wife is the queen of them all.

Funny quote on a husband's T-Shirt: All girls are devils, but my

wife is the queen of them all.

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