05-08-2011 Husbands Love Your Wives

8/6/2019 05-08-2011 Husbands Love Your Wives

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Gods Design For Your Marriage

May 8 , 2011Pastor John Isaacs

Kingsway Community Church

Husb and, Love Yo ur Wife!


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Genesis 2:24For this cause a man shall

leave his father and hismother, and shall cleave

to his wife; and they shallbecome one flesh.


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God s design for marriage:One man joined toone woman in a

covenantal bondfor a lifetime.


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H usbands Role1 . Inescapable Headship2. Be Loving3. Be Nourishing

4. Be Cherishing5. Be Understanding

6. Be Honoring


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W ife s Role1 . Voluntary Submission2. Be Respectful3. Be Affectionate

4. Be Wise and Chaste5. Keep a Good House

6. Be Pleasant


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Love &Respect

By Dr. Emerson Eggerichs


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Ephesians 5:31-3331As the Scriptures say, A man leaves hisfather and mother and is joined to his wife,and the two are united into one. 32 This isa great mystery, but it is an illustration ofthe way Christ and the church are one. 33 Soagain I say, each man

must lovehis

wife as he loves himself, and the wife

must respect her husband.


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The love she most desires,

the respect he desperately needs. A wife has a driving need - to be

loved . When that need is met, she ismore fulfilled.

A husband has a driving need - tobe respected . When that need is met,he is more happy.


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The Crazy CycleWhen a husband feelsdisrespected, it is especially hard tolove his wife.

When a wife feels unloved,it is especially hard to respect her husband.


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Without Love

Without Respect

She ReactsHe Reacts

TheCrazyCycle


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The Crazy CycleWhen a wife reacts to her husband, he interprets it as

disrespect and contempt.

When a man withdraws from his

wife, she interprets it as unloving.


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The Crazy CycleM

en hear criticism as contemptand disgust and feel disrespected.

Women feel silence as hostilityand abandonment and feel unloved.


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The Crazy CycleWhen a woman is criticizing her

husband, her BPM remains steadybut his escalates substantially.

When a man withdraws and walksaway, his BPM begins to decline buthers will escalate substantially.


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His Love

Her Respect

MotivatesMotivates

TheEnergizingCycle


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1.Appreciate her desire to be

close.Your wife feels Close to you when

You hold her hand.You hug her.

You are with her alone so you can focuson each other and laugh together.

You go for a walk or jog anythingthat results in togetherness.


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1.Appreciate her desire to be

close.Your wife feels Close to you when

You let her know you enjoy discussingthings with her and getting her insights.

You suggest the unexpected gettakeout and eat on the beach take awalk to see the full moon park on thebluff and watch the sunset.


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2. Appreciate her desire for

you to be open.Your wife feels you are open when

You share your feelings, telling aboutyour day and difficulties.

You say, Let s talk, ask her what she sfeeling, and ask for her opinions.

Your face shows you want to talk relaxed body language, good eye contact.


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You talk about the kids and problemsshe may be having with them.

You discuss financial concerns, possiblejob changes, or ideas for your future.

You pray with her.


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You give her your full attention nogrunting responses while trying to watchTV, read the newspaper, or write e-mails.


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you to understand her.She feels you understand her when

You listen and can repeat back what shesaid.

You don t try to fix her problemsunless she specifically asks for a solution.

You try to identify her feelings.


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You never dismiss her feelings, nomatter how illogical they may seem to you.

You say, I appreciate your sharing thatwith me.

You don t interrupt her when she strying to tell you how she feels.


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You apologize and admit you werewrong.

You express appreciation for all shedoes: Honey, I could never do your job.

You pray with her and for her.


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4. Appreciate her need to be

a Peacemaker.She feels at peace with you when

You let her vent her frustrations andhurts and don t get angry and close her off.

You admit you are wrong and apologizeby saying, I m sorry, I was wrong, will youforgive me?


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You try to keep your relationship up-to-date, resolving the unresolved and never saying, forget it.

You forgive her for any wrongs sheconfesses.

You never nurse bitterness and alwaysreassure her of your love.


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You understand her natural desire tonegotiate, compromise, and defer, andyou meet her halfway.

You pray with her after a hurtful time.


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5. Appreciate her need to

know you are committed.She will feel your loyalty when

You speak highly of her in front ofothers.

You are involved in things important toher.

You help her make decisions, such asones regarding the children.


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You are never critical of her or your children in front of others.

You include her in social gatheringswhen others may leave their spouseshome.

You tell the kids, don t speak to your mother that way!


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You call and let her know your plans.You keep your promises.

You never ever never ever use the Dword.


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6 . Appreciate her need to be

cherished.She will feel your loving care when

You say, I m so proud of the way youhandled that.

You speak highly of her in front ofothers.

You give her encouragement or praisewith kindness and enthusiasm.


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You are physically affectionate with her in public.

You teach the children to show her andothers respect.

You value her opinion as valid.Understanding that different isn t wrong.


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You choose family outings over, guythings.

You make her feel first in importance.

You are proud of her and all she does.


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G od s DesignU nconditional

Love


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G od s Design

By Being Close

Loving Your W ife


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G od s Design

By Being Open

Loving Your W ife


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G od s Design

By BeingUnderstanding

Loving Your W ife


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G od s Design

By H elping H er BeA Peacemaker

Loving Your W ife


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G od s Design

By BeingCommitted

Loving Your W ife


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G od s Design

By Cherishing H er

Loving Your W ife


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Appreciate her need 1 . For you to be close .2. For you to be open .

3. For you to understand her.4. For you to help her be a

peacemaker .5. For you to be committed .

6 For you to cherish her

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05-08-2011 Husbands Love Your Wives