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1© 2004 Bertram Group Consulting
Reading Between The Lines
QRCA
Annual Conference
October 29, 2004
2© 2004 Bertram Group Consulting
Why They Don’t Just Say It
• Respondents and clients do not explicitly express their true thoughts and feelings due to fear of:– Ridicule– Embarrassment– Rejection
• They may be intimidated by terminology• They may feel social distance from others• Our efforts to put them at ease are unlikely to completely
eliminate all inhibiting forces
3© 2004 Bertram Group Consulting
Active Listening Is:
• Much more than perking up your ears to hear the spoken words
• Setting aside assumptions and personal biases
• A practiced skill set:– Recognizing clues– Exploring clues – Responding to emotion
4© 2004 Bertram Group Consulting
Active Listening Is:
• Complimentary to body language and neurolinguistics
• Comprehensive regarding all forms of communication– Words that are spoken =7%– Tone of voice = 3%– Body language = 60%
5© 2004 Bertram Group Consulting
Recognize the Clues
• Unshared ideas, concerns or expectations are likely to be reflected in or implied by recognizable clues
• Clues may be spoken– Speech editing
• Repetition of statement or phrase • Speech censorship or prolonged, reflective pauses
6© 2004 Bertram Group Consulting
Recognize the Clues
– Personal stories • Appear tangential or off track
– Problem solving statements or questions• Represent an effort to resolve an unspoken issue• “Loaded” questions
– Expressions of emotion• Direct• Projected• Vivid or heightened intensity
7© 2004 Bertram Group Consulting
Recognize the Clues
• Clues may be observed in behaviors– How respondents:
• Examine a product• Work on a written exercise
– How clients:• Manage the logistics of a meeting• Interact with other company or agency observers
8© 2004 Bertram Group Consulting
Be Aware of Moderator Constraints
• Time
• Discussion guide
• Meeting agenda
• Fear of addressing the issue or emotion
• Easier to avoid
• Already know the answer
• Lack of elicitation skills
9© 2004 Bertram Group Consulting
Value of Clue Recognition and Follow Up
• Uncover critical information that fulfills objectives and actually saves time– Similar to patient/physician interactions
• Underlying concerns not addressed• Patient does not think real problem was
addressed, so does not follow physician’s recommendations
– Moderators experience “diagnostic” pitfalls, based on assumptions
10© 2004 Bertram Group Consulting
Skills to Hone
• Ask direct questions about feelings– “How do you feel about switching to a different
brand?”
• Reflect statements or behaviors– “You are frustrated. Help me understand
why.”– “I notice your clenched fist. What are you
feeling?”
11© 2004 Bertram Group Consulting
Skills to Hone
• Displacement– Shifting ownership of a thought or idea to
others
“Some people might be skeptical about this product. How do you feel about it?”
12© 2004 Bertram Group Consulting
Skills to Hone
• Normalizing
– Acknowledge expression of emotion“I see this makes you angry.”
– Legitimize the emotion“Anger is one of the possible reactions people have to this issue.”
13© 2004 Bertram Group Consulting
Skills to Hone
• Hypothesizing– Formulate a potential reaction and test it
“I wonder if you are feeling overwhelmed by this?”
14© 2004 Bertram Group Consulting
Skills to Hone
• Respond non-verbally– Use timely and appropriate silences – Create a void – This opens the door for someone else to jump
in with what they are thinking or feeling
15© 2004 Bertram Group Consulting
Benefits of Active Listening
• Greater depth of insights
• Reached faster and more efficiently
• Smoother and more satisfying relationships with clients
• Skills are also useful in family and personal relationships
16© 2004 Bertram Group Consulting
Benefits of Active Listening
A good moderator brings added value beyond just covering each point on the discussion guide or meeting agenda.
Active listening skills can be used to reveal truths that make a difference.
17© 2004 Bertram Group Consulting
Benefits of Active Listening (adapted from Peter Drucker)
• Some moderators make things happen
• Some moderators watch things happen
• Some moderators wonder what happened
_____________________
The difference is active listening