CONFLICT RESOLUTION

&

MANAGEMENT SKILLS

Nii Okley Botchway

OUT LINE

• What is conflict?• What is marital conflict?• What is the different between conflict resolution &

conflict Management? • What are the possible causes marital ?• Prevention/ resolution/management skills• Peace building

Nii Okley Botchway

Luke: 17: 1

• Conflict is part and parcel of the human the human existence. It is inevitable.

• Jesus said it will surely come.

• Nii Okley Botchway

What is conflict?

• Is the unfortunate coincidence or opposition, a violent collusion, contest or war.

• It is a mental or emotional struggle.

• It means to fight, contend to clash; to be unfortunately simultaneous

Nii Okley Botchway

What is marital conflict?

• Is the Collision on incompatible forces within a “life – space”

• In marriage setting the relevant “forces” could cover range eg. Inherent in the “gender” factor differences that is masculine/ famine co-existence and implicit psychological, emotional social cultural dimensions.

• Marriage being basically two individuals interacting within the limited confines of the bond holding them together, for the purpose of achieving a mutually accepted GOAL, it become almost inevitable that some points of conflict can rise between the two.

• Most likely sources of marital conflict may include:- Respectable family background

• Personal values

• - Role perception and

• - Personal expectation

• - Behaviors in terms of upbringing of children

• - Personal attitudes towards money,

• in –laws etc.

• Sexual intercourse

• Inordinate pride on part of either partner for example if one to social origins or financial status one feels superior to the other, this pride could develop into a tendency to magnify the perceived faults on the -weaknesses of the other

Problem of ambivalence that is latent hostility and the love-hate factor.

NEED FOR RESOLUTION MEASURES

• Any conflict is potentially destructive at many different levels and degrees of importance.

• The problem becomes even more serious when one partner can gain only at the expense of the other.

• NB: This becomes a sum – zero game in which there must be a loser. This can be very precarious in a marriage because any WIN-LOSE proposition is band to generate conflict.

• Conflict generates perceptional error and biased judgments; and if allowed to reach the boiling point it will be difficult to cool it off therefore.

OVERCOMING CONFLICT

• Marriage partners must understand that, combined; they form one superior entity (Eccl. 4:9) for instance, if they have some important task to do together OR to face some common crisis requiring their combined effort.

• If a Win – Lose conflict leaves no room for COMPROMISE or MERGER, then a MERATORmay have to impose a solution

( a family elder, respectable Minister, chief etc)

• NB: Role of a MEDIATOR can be truly depending on how he “performs” Either the couple in conflict will see him as practical, fair open – minded, impartial, honest etc

Matt.: 18: 15-17

• One to one

• Two to one

• You & the church to one

• Drop the issue, leave it

Eph. 4: 26-27,29, 32

• When you sin do not sin

• Don’t let the sun go down on your anger

• Your words should Gracious (Full of Grace)

• Remember you are one

• Walking in love, kindness, tender heartedness, forgiveness and so on

Peace building

It is much better

• To foresee it

• To read it off

• Not to require either partner to lose face

THANK TOU

Any question?