A one day seminar slides- free-Workplace conflict Management

WORKPLACE CONFLICT MANAGEMENT

Dr.E.J.Sarma 4-October -2015

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AGENDA

• Conflict of Personal level /groups/communities/nations

• Conflict with Boss/Harassment• Conflict Processes• Clash of values/principles• Resolution strategies• Few of the greatest corporate conflicts• Role of mentor/religion• Sum up

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AGENDA • Introduction

• Understanding the concept

• Types of workplace conflict-Personal/Interpersonal/Team

• Levels and Types of Conflict in Organizations• The Sources of Conflict in Organizations

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KEY LEARNING POINTS/GOALS FOR TODAY

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Understand the

Terminology ,

conflict types , styles

The strategy for resolution

CONFLICT-?

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Let us find as many alternate words for Conflict

Please write

UNDERSTAND THE CONCEPT

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Dispute, Quarrel ,

Squabble , Opposite standDisagreement,

Opposition, Discord, collision,

War , Deviation , Clash, Encounter

Contradiction, Irreconcilable, Deviation,

Rivalry,Fracas, fight, Quarrel

your score 1-1011-1415-19>20

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ENTRY BEHAVIOR1-Write 3 of your belief about conflicts

2-Think of one incident in your personal life

where you were involved in conflict situation

What role you played

And how did you feel about the outcome 8

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CHECK THE MENTAL MODEL

Conflict is battle of nerves and outcome is dependent on personalitiesSomeone has to lose andwin- win is never possible as outcomeThere is no techniques that can be used to work through a conflict successfully so everybody wins

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CHECKING BELIEF

e.g

• You must hire people from same culture to get common view

• Committees can not resolve conflicts

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MENTAL MODEL

The famous adage, “two heads are better than one” is precisely about the advantages of conflict, for it assumes that two minds will have separate perspectives, experiences, and ideas.

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MENTAL MODEL

• Diversity and communication are hallmarks of a great team, and the occasional root cause of clashes in the office.

• Conflict is a good thing; it’s our response that makes conflict either a creative or destructive process.

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MENTAL MODEL ?✕ Is Conflict every day

occurrence?✕ With family or friends,

boss, coworkers or customers.

✕ Conflict will occur and Criticality is , how we understand, resolve and

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Perception and mental model

Our view of the world around us is all due to the way we perceive things and our behavior is based on our belief

It is important to know why we behave the way we behave

Let us have some fun

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Male/Female style differences

Hypothesis - gender difference would exist in conflict resolution style

female managers with 1-10 years experience will exhibit more communicative behavior than male managers.

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Male/Female style differences

A gender difference would exist in conflict resolution style within the group of male managers with 1-10 years experience

and exhibit more competitive behavior than female managers.

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Gender differencesResearch data did reveal significant differences between females

and males in compromising

Results indicated males scored slightly higher in obliging and dominating than females.

Females scored slightly lower in obliging and dominating than males.

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Gender differences Results indicated females scored slightly higher in avoiding and

integrating than males.

Males scored slightly lower in avoiding and integrating than females.

Females scored higher in compromising than males and work

to develop common agreement.

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Perception impact

Perception is vitiated by all these and is

complex process. hence most of our

judgment can go wrong

Be very conscious of this while judging

and concluding

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CONFLICT MANAGEMENT STYLES

• There are only five generally acknowledged styles for dealing with conflict:

• Compromising, Avoiding,

• Integrating, Dominating Obliging.

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Styles• Compromising stylists tend to be "middle of the road" in

style

• They want both parties to gain some, but both will also need to give a little as well.

• Avoidance style suggests, simply leave the conflict altogether.

• Integrators tend to be open to others' differences and try to come to an understanding that satisfies both parties.

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Styles Dominating stylists tend to be aggressive

and push for win always

Obliging- tends to give up easily

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CONFLICT AND MENTAL MODEL

• Those who dominate are primarily concerned with their own desires and do not readily compromise,

• while those who oblige are willing to give up what they want to make everyone happy.

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CONFLICT AND Causes

Does every conflict warrants a confrontation

The need is attitude to attempt to sort it out.

Conflicts arise not so much because of what

the other person said or did,

but because of our sensitive trigger 24

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In dealing with conflict always keep three

key elements in mind

Interdependency of parties

Perception of incompatible goals

Context of Conflict Situations

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● Remember conflict will involve anyone or all of these

● Disagreements

● Debates

● Disputes

● Obstruction -Preventing someone from reaching valued goals

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WHAT CONFLICT INVOLVES• Conflict is not always bad for

organization(50 most famous corporate conflicts)

• Do not need to reduce all conflict to agreements

• Ebb and flow of during conflict resolution process

• Healthy conflict Needed for growth and survival

• Strategy may include increasing and decreasing intensity of conflict

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FUNCTIONAL AND DYSFUNCTIONAL CONFLICT

• Functional conflict: Involved parties work

• toward the positive outcome /goals of an organization or group

• Dysfunctional conflict: Parties block an organization or group from reaching the goals

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FUNCTIONAL AND DYSFUNCTIONAL CONFLICT • Functional conflict

● Increases information quality and ideas

● Encourages innovative thinking

● Unshackles different points of view

● Reduces stagnation

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FUNCTIONAL ANDDYSFUNCTIONAL CONFLICT (CONT.)

• Dysfunctional high conflict leads to● Tension, anxiety, stress

● Drives out low conflict tolerant people

● Reduced trust

● Poor decisions because of withheld or distorted

information● Excessive management focus on the conflict 30

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BEHIND CONFLICTS

• Ideologies

• Ego/hubris

• Power/status

• Greed

• Attitude :Opposing just for the sake of • Perceived Threats 31

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FUNCTIONAL AND DYSFUNCTIONAL CONFLICT (CONT.)

• Dysfunctional low conflict-hidden/latent

● Fewer new ideas

● Poor decisions from lack of innovation and information

● Stagnation

● Business as usual32

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LEVELS AND TYPES OF CONFLICT

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Individual

Group

Organization

Type of conflict

Level of conflict

Within and between organizations

Intra/inter group

Within and between individuals

LEVELS AND TYPES OF CONFLICT (CONT.)

Intra organizational conflict

Conflict that occurs within an organizationat interfaces of organization functions ;Can occur along the vertical and horizontaldimensions

Vertical conflict: between managers and subordinates

Horizontal conflict: between departments and work groups

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LEVELS AND TYPES OF CONFLICT (CONT.)• Intragroup conflict

● Conflict among members of a group-jealousy-rivalry

● Early stages of group development● Ways of doing tasks or reaching group's goals

• Intergroup conflict: between two or more groups-competition VS collaboration

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LEVELS AND TYPES OF CONFLICT (CONT.)

Interpersonal conflict Between two or more people

Differences in views about what should be done

Efforts to get more

Differences in orientation to work and time in

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LEVELS AND TYPES OF CONFLICT (CONT.) Intrapersonal conflict

Occurs within an individual

Threat to a person’s values

Feeling of unfair treatment

Multiple and contradictory sources of socialization

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LEVELS AND TYPESOF CONFLICT (CONT.)

Inter organizational conflict

● Between two or more organizations

● Competition to 0utwit

● Examples: suppliers and distributors, especially with the close links now possible

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TEAM CONFLICT REASONS

Many reasons for conflict within a team or between teams.

To Simplify the source of the conflict

Examine whether the conflict is task- based or if it stems from a relational issue.

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TEAM CONFLICT REASONS

• This separation is often helpful because,

task-based conflict is productive while

Relationship-based conflict is destructive to the desired outcome.

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CONFLICT STAGES

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Latent conflict

Conflict aftermath

Manifest conflict

Simple conflict episode

CONFLICT LEVELS

Latent conflict: antecedents of conflict past behavior that can start conflict

Manifest conflict: observable conflict behavior

Conflict aftermathEnd of a conflict episodeOften the starting point of a related episodeBecomes the latent conflict for another

Conflict reduction: lower the conflict level

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CONFLICT MANIFESTATIONS

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Latent conflict

Conflict aftermath

Manifest conflict

Conflict reduction


The antecedents of conflict

Example: scarce resources

Latent conflict

Manifest conflict

Conflict aftermath


Observable conflict behavior

Example: disagreement, discussion

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Latent conflict

Manifest conflict

Conflict aftermath


Manifest conflict

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Latent conflict

Conflict aftermath

Residue of aconflict episode

Example:compromise in

allocating scarceresources leaves bothparties with less than

they wanted


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Latent conflict

Manifest conflict

Conflict aftermath

Perceived conflict Felt conflict

Conflict reduction

CONFLICT MANIFESTATIONS • Perceived conflict

● Become aware that one is in conflict with another party

● Attempt to block out some conflict● Can perceive conflict when no latent conditions

exist● Example: misunderstanding another person’s

position on an issue

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CONFLICT EPISODES (CONT.)• Felt conflict

● Emotional part of conflict● Personalizing the conflict● Oral and physical hostility● Hard to manage episodes with high felt conflict● What people likely recall about conflict

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RELATIONSHIPS AMONG CONFLICT PROCESS

• Process links through the connection latent origin of conflict to aftermath .

• Effective conflict management: break the connection

• Discover the latency of conflicts and remove them

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CONFLICT FRAMES AND ORIENTATIONS Conflict frames

Perceptual sets that people bring to conflict episodesPerceptual filters

• Remove some information from an episode• Emphasize other information in an episode

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CONFLICT FRAMES AND ORIENTATIONS (CONT.)

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Relationship-Task

Emotional-Intellectual

Cooperate-WinConflictframe

CONFLICT FRAMESAND ORIENTATIONS (CONT.)• Conflict frame dimensions

Relationship-Task• Relationship: focuses on interpersonal relationships• Task: focuses on material aspects of a result

Emotional-Intellectual• Emotional: focuses on feelings in the conflict episode

(felt conflict)• Intellectual: focuses on observed behavior (manifest

conflict)

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CONFLICT FRAMESAND ORIENTATIONS (CONT.)

• Conflict frame dimensions (cont.)

Cooperate-Win• Cooperate: emphasizes the role of all parties to the

conflict• Win: wants to maximize personal gain

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Choose your animal

• Which one animal below you identify most?

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3

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5

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Conflict orientations● Dominance: wants to win; conflict is a battle● Collaborative: wants to find a solution that

satisfies everyone● Compromise: splits the differences● Avoidance: backs away● Accommodative: focuses on desires of other

party

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CONFLICT FRAMESAND ORIENTATIONS (CONT.)

• Strategy can change during conflict progress based on how firmly the person holds position ● Importance of the issues to the person● Perception of opponent's power

• Collaborative orientation: more positive long-term benefits than the others

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AvoidanceAccommodative

DominanceCompromiseCollaborative

Conflict aftermathHigh residueNo residue

Conflict orientation and the conflict aftermath

CONFLICT AND ORIENTATIONS -Commonly observed• Combinations of conflict orientations in a

group● Dominance, avoidance● Dominance, dominance● Avoidance, avoidance● Dominance, collaborative, compromise● Collaborative, compromise, avoidance● Collaborative, compromise, avoidance,

dominance, accommodative

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LATENT CONFLICT: THE SOURCES OF CONFLICT IN ORGANIZATIONS• There is antecedents • Many natural conditions of organizations act

as latent conflicts• Lurk in the background; trigger conflict when

right conditions occur• Does not always lead to manifest conflict• Give us clues about how to reduce

dysfunctional high conflict

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LATENT CONFLICT: THE SOURCES OF CONFLICT IN ORGANIZATIONS (CONT.)

• Some representative latent conflict (cont.)

● Interdependence: forces interaction

● Communication barriers: shift work and jargon

● Ambiguous jurisdictions: areas of authority not clearly defined

● Reward systems: reward different behavior in different parts of the organization 66

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CONFLICT OF INTEREST

A term used to describe the situation in which a

public official or fiduciary who, contrary to the

obligation and absolute duty to act for the

benefit of the public or a designated individual,

exploits the relationship for personal benefit,

typically pecuniary.

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CONFLICT MANAGEMENT MODEL Maintain conflict at functional levels

● Not complete elimination● Reducing to functional levels● Increasing dysfunction ally low conflict● Choose desired level of conflict based on

perceived conflict requirements● Varies in different parts of an organization● Manager’s tolerance for conflict plays a role

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ORGANIZATIONAL CONFLICT MANAGEMENT MODEL

(CONT.)

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Perceived conflict requirements

Desired conflict level

Organizationalculture

Fast-changingenvironment

Product orservice

CONFLICT MANAGEMENT MODEL (CONT.)

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Normal

Increase

conflict

Decrease

conflict

Dysfunctionallow conflict

Dysfunction allyhigh conflict


• Symptoms of dysfunction ally high conflict● Low trust or high mistrust● Information distortion/withholding● Tension/antagonism/confrontation● Stress/anger● Sabotage of other party’s interest

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• Symptoms of dysfunction ally low conflict● Deny differences● Repress controversial information● Prohibit disagreements● Avoid interactions● Walk away from conflict episode

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REDUCING /RESOLVING CONFLICT

● Lose-lose methods: parties to the conflict do not get what they want

● Win-lose methods: one party a clear winner; other party clear loser

Win-win methods: each party to the conflict gets what he or she wants

Win-No deal- one party alone gets their goal otherwise break all negotiations 73

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REDUCING CONFLICT (CONT.)• Lose-lose methods

● Avoidance• Withdraw, stay away• Does not permanently reduce conflict

● Compromise• Bargain, negotiate• Each loses something valued

● Smoothing: find similarities

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REDUCING CONFLICT (CONT.)

• Win-lose methods● Dominance

• Overwhelm other party• Overwhelms an avoidance

orientation● Authoritative command:

decision by person in authority● Majority rule: voting

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REDUCING CONFLICT (CONT.)

• Win-win methods● Problem solving: find root causes● Integration: meet interests and desires of all

parties● Superordinate goal: desired by all but not

reachable alone

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REDUCING CONFLICT (CONT.)• Summary

● Lose-lose methods: compromise● Win-lose methods: dominance● Win-win methods: problem solving

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WIN/WINLOSE/LOSEWIN/LOSELOSE/WINWIN-NO DEAL

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NEXT TIME I SUGGEST YOU TRY “WIN-WIN” NEGOTIATING”

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INCREASING CONFLICT• Increase conflict when it is dysfunctionally low

● Heterogeneous groups: members have different backgrounds

● Devil’s advocate: offers alternative views● Organizational culture: values and norms that

embrace conflict and debate

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Some Negotiating steps are tough to take... D

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a-Conflict m

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HANDLING EMOTIONS

Emotional ChallengesAnger/exasperationInsultedGuiltFalse flattery

Recommended Response

Allow venting. Probe for why

What wouldn’t be insulting?

Focus on issuesRe-focus

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CONFLICT GENERATING CAUSES• Taking credit for other people’s work or

stealing ideas• Talking over people in meetings • Not inviting team members to team /social

events • Not rendering help by covering for people

when they are off sick

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CONFLICT REASONS• Excessive personal use of the Internet or

official email• Poor attendance / time-keeping • Any form of bullying behavior or harassment • Any form of discriminatory behavior • Unacceptable language • Theft • Alcohol/ drug problems.

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CONFLICT REASONS• Not taking messages for people • using someone else’s contacts or information

without permission • not including people in important emails • ignoring or being discourteous • Poor personal hygiene

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ASPECTS OF CONFLICT IN ORGANIZATIONS

• Cultures that emphasize individualism and competition● Positively value conflict● English-speaking countries, the Netherlands, Italy,

Belgium

• Cultures that emphasize collaboration, cooperation, conformity● Negatively value conflict● Many Asian –Japanese and Latin American

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ASPECTS OF CONFLICT IN ORGANIZATIONS (CONT.)

Cultural differences imply different functional conflict levels

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ASPECTS OF CONFLICT IN ORGANIZATIONS (CONT.)

• Cross-cultural research has dealt with intergroup processes

• Collaborative and cooperative cultures expect little conflict during intergroup interactions

• Favor suppression of conflict with little discussion about people's feelings

• Felt conflict likely part of some conflict episodes but hidden from public view

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INTERNATIONAL ASPECTS OFCONFLICT IN ORGANIZATIONS (CONT.)• Managers from an individualistic country

operating in a less individualistic country● Acceptable to express feelings during a conflict

episode● Suppression of feelings could baffle them● Increasing conflict can confuse local people● Almost immediate dysfunctional results

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ETHICAL ISSUES IN CONFLICT IN ORGANIZATIONS' Tolerance for conflict

● Manager with a high tolerance for conflict; keeps conflict levels too high for subordinates

● Should such managers reveal their intentions about desired conflict levels?

● Full disclosure: subordinates could leave the group if conflict levels became dysfunction ally stressful

● Ethical question applies equally to newly hired employees

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ETHICAL ISSUES INCONFLICT IN ORGANIZATIONS (CONT.)

Deliberately increasing conflict is an effort to guide behavior in a desired direction

● Subtle methods of increasing conflict (forming heterogeneous groups) connote manipulation

● Full disclosure: manager states his intention to use conflict to generate ideas and innovation

● If people are free to join a group or not, the ethical issue likely subsides

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ETHICAL ISSUES INCONFLICT IN ORGANIZATIONS (CONT.)• Experiencing intrapersonal conflict

● Requests to act against one's moral values● Observing behavior that one considers unethical

• Reduce intrapersonal conflict● Report unethical acts● Transfer to another part of the organization● Quit

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ETHICAL ISSUES INCONFLICT IN ORGANIZATIONS (CONT.)

Different cultures place different values on conflict

● Optimal conflict levels vary among countries● Lower levels conflict in collectivistic countries

than individualistic countries● Corruption and bribe is way of life in our

country while other nations deal with it at very high level

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CULTURE INFLUENCE AND CONFLICT HANDLING• Uchi-Soto ("Us and Them")-one will notice

about the Japanese. They have been raised to think of themselves as part of a group, and their group is always dealing with other groups.

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CULTURE INFLUENCE AND CONFLICT HANDLING

• Dealing with Japanese on a one-to-one basis usually is very easy to non-Japanese, but dealing with Japanese as a group can be a different matter altogether. And no matter how nice you are, or how good your Japanese becomes, you will always be treated as an outsider. In fact the literal meaning of "gaijin" is outsider.

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CULTURE INFLUENCE AND CONFLICT HANDLING• Japanese are extremely sensitive to what

others might think of them .• Being ostracized is one of the worst things

that can happen to a Japanese• Therefore, when making requests, it often

takes more time since the person asked usually consults others in the group to reach a consensus

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• In short, however, while the westerner starts so many sentences with "I", the Japanese "I" usually means "with the approval of the group".

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• Uchi-soto has one other important trait -- • there are next to no strikes in Japan ever

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Because Japanese labor-management relations are better? Partly, yes.

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CULTURE INFLUENCE AND CONFLICT HANDLINGBut in Japan there are almost no industrial unions like the CITU AIBEA Each large corporation has its own union, and they feel no bond with other company unions even if they are doing the same work. In one sense, the company union is almost a puppet, led by a management executive.

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POWER OF CONFLICT LESS TEAMWORKHIGH PERFORMANCE TEAMS

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HOW TO APPROACH CONFLICT

Self role in handling conflict

role of mediator

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MIRROR MIRROR…ON THE WALL…

• How do we approach the issue ?

• Do we respect other people’s opinions?

• What makes people angry?

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MIRROR MIRROR…ON THE WALL…• What are the

warning signs of anger?

• What to do : walk away ?

• Take a moment to think?

• Agree with the other person and “give in”? 104

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CLUES – AGITATION AND AGGRESSION

Do you recognise when someone is becoming irritated or not is your first clue someone shouting at you or storming off?

Some other clues for you: Voice changes pitch

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CLUES – AGITATION AND AGGRESSION

• flushes or goes pale

• Breathing rate changes

• Tense body posture

• Eye contact changes – either more direct and challenging or avoiding eye contact completely

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WHAT DO PEOPLE DO?Five basic ways of addressing conflict were identified by Thomas and Kilmann in 1976:

• Avoidance• Collaboration• Compromise• Competition• Accommodation

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Strategies for conflict management

1081

2

5

4

3

high

highlow

Avoidance-tortoise Accommodation-

chameleon

Competition lion Collaboration-Dolphin

Compromise-Zebra

confrontation

cooperation

AVOIDANCEWhat does it look like?Avoid or postpone conflict by; Ignoring it.✕ Respecting that everyone has

different opinions

✕ Asking to talk about it later, when it’s less busy (for

example)

When to use it?✕ For minor – non-recurring

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COLLABORATIONWhat does it look like?• Working together to find

a mutually beneficial solution

When to use it?• As part of problem

solving• In meetings or 1:1

Potential outcomes• Win-win solutions to

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• How much time you have available and how

well you know those you are speaking with

• How to use your questioning skills to capture

everyone’s requirements

• How to gain agreement before continuing

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COMPROMISEWhat does it look like?• Finding a middle ground in

which each party is partially satisfied

When to use it?• As part of problem solving• When the time to

collaborate effectively is not available

• When the situation is less complex

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Potential outcomes• The key requirements or expectations of

those involved may be resolved

Consider• Will those involved be satisfied with a

partial solution• How to use your questioning skills to

capture requirements• How to gain agreement before continuing

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ACCOMMODATIONWhat does it look like?• Surrender your own

needs and wishes to accommodate the other party

When to use it?• If this will achieve the

best outcome

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ACCOMMODATION

Potential outcomes• A short term solution that you can live with• If you are the one accommodating, then

over time, you might resent working in this way

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Consider

• Why would your viewpoint be any less correct or relevant than anyone else’s?

• What the circumstance is• Do you need to build a working

relationship?• Are you choosing to do this because of

hierarchy?• What you could ask those involved in

order to understand the situation better?

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TOOL BOX TOOLS AND TECHNIQUESEmpathy• Walk a mile in the other person’s shoes

(figuratively speaking)

Active listening• Use good eye contact, body posture, nodding and

acknowledgement when someone is talking to you

• Summarize and paraphrase what you hear and repeat it back without changing language styles to make sure you are on the same page and understand what has been said

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TECHNIQUES

Take your time

● Give the other person time to respond and

pace to do so

● No matter how thin you slice it – there are

always 2 sides

● Remember respect cuts both ways

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Open Questions

● What, Where, How,

● Who (be careful of Why questions

can start to feel like an interrogation

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DO…. EMPATHISE WITH THEM• The focus of your listening is to understand the

other party – for you to “get it”

• Work to let them know what it is you “got”

• Use communication skills such as – paraphrasing and summarising

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TECHNIQUES

Use the same sorts of words they ✕are using (not the expletives)

✕Check your understanding

✕Acknowledge what has been said

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LISTEN• This is not the easiest thing

to do,• show that you are focused

on understanding the other person’s point of view.

• Focus on the words you choose, your tone of voice, your hand movements and body language

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FORMULA FOR EFFECTIVE LISTENING

• L-Look Interested• I- Inquire• S-Stay on target• T-Test your understanding• E-Evaluate body language• N-Neutralize feelings

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TAKE YOUR TIME

• The only person you can control is you

• If you start to get angry take a break think about how to handle the situation

• Ask questions and keep an open mind

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ConsiderAlways show respect No matter how much you disagree with someone – your challenge is with the subject, context, circumstance or argument

NOT with the person

How does it affect you, when you do not feel you are being listened to…someone stands over you…raises their voice….speaks over you….wags their finger at you….tells you off? 125

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EXPLAIN WITH CARE• How can you do this when your point of

view is very different from theirs?• Use “I” statements rather than “you”

statements • Instead of “you don’t know what you’re

talking about” try “I’d like to explain my perspective to you”

• Blaming and judging people is not helpful and will not effectively find a solution

• Avoid discussing attitudes and personalities 126

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THINK CREATIVELY• Use the different

methods explored here

• Work to identify different solutions from those so far rejected by one of the parties

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AT TIMES• Accept the

situation• Conflict

cannot always be avoided

• Not every conflict is negative

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CONFLICT RESOLUTION

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Learning to negotiate

WHY AND HOW OF CONFLICT RESOLUTION TRAINING?

• Understand the effect conflict has on you• Recognize when it is appropriate to communicate

with an angry person • Understand how to diffuse negative encounters • Learn how to speak with others on uncomfortable

or potentially “hot topics” and maintain a professional approach

• Understand the motivators for anger• Recognise when it is no longer safe to

communicate and the only safe response is to walk away`

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WORKPLACE CONFLICT WITH BOSS –HOW TO HANDLE

• Learn to deal more effectively with difficult bosses and supervisors.

• How To Deal With A Difficult Boss ?• Bosses and supervisors aren't from another

planet, but sometimes they seem to be

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WORKPLACE CONFLICT WITH BOSS-

Conflict with a difficult boss can be daunting and intimidating. Here are some tips to help you deal with difficult bosses and supervisors.

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WORKPLACE CONFLICT- CONFLICT AND BOSS

• Most people at some point in their lives have to deal with a difficult boss.

• Difficult supervisors vary in personality from being pushy or rude, all the way to being downright abusive.

• Task vs relationship styles

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CONFLICT AND BOSS✕ Many people feel abusive boss has control of

personal life outside of work and lower the self-esteem and live in constant fear. ✕ The role of a supervisor is controlling ; attracts personalities who like the power✕ A supervisor has complete control over most

basic human needs— ability to put food on the table and a roof over your head.

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• These are powerful motivating factors that allow a difficult boss /supervisor to control people out of fear of losing these basic needs.

• We may not be able to always correct their behavior, but we should never have to live in fear and let our difficult boss control our lives.

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• Here are some strategies on handling a difficult boss situation.

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• Always have a plan B. Most people are scared about having a discussion with their boss concerning their abusive behavior because they fear reprimand or losing their job as a result of it.

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• Their fear is usually justified if the supervisor is a control-freak and feels that their subordinate is threatening their control.

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• Before you deal with any type of conflict, you always need to have a plan B in case things don’t work out.

• A plan B is the best alternative that you can come up without having to negotiate anything with your boss.

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WORKPLACE CONFLICT-

✕ Your best plan B would probably take the form of having an actual job offer in hand with another employer before you have your talk.

✕ By not having a backup plan, you have given your abusive boss even more leverage over you because they know you have nowhere else to go.

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WORKPLACE CONFLICT-

• Having a plan B, however, empowers you with the ability to walk-away at any time should the negotiation not go right. Increase your power and have a plan B before you deal with the conflict.

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WORKPLACE CONFLICT-• Never react to verbal abuse or harsh

criticism with emotion.

• This will gets you into more trouble than you started with because it will become a war between egos and chances are good that your boss has a bigger ego than you have—

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BOSS AND CONFLICT

• When a personal attack is made , it is bait to reacting emotionally and become easy target for additional attacks.

• The key then is not to react, but to acknowledge and move on.

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CONFLICT WITH BOSS

✕ By doing this, you effectively strip all of the power behind their verbal attacks away from your abusive boss, without creating conflict.

✕ If your boss happens to be an intimidator or a control freak, then the best way of dealing with their behavior is to remain calm and acknowledge their power by saying,

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Angry boss?

• "You're right, I'm sorry." By saying this, you

• take away any chance of boss lashing back at

• you because you have sidestepped the verbal attack rather than meeting it head on.

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CONFLICT WITH BOSS

• Feel neglected when not recognized for performance.

• Not giving credit when due• Or steals credit

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WORKPLACE CONFLICT-

• Discuss rather than confront.

• When your boss criticizes you than appreciating, don’t react out of emotion and become confrontational

because that just breeds more conflict.

• Instead, indulge in discussion on with data.148

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WORKPLACE CONFLICT-

• Ask them for the advice on how your work

can be improved.

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CONFLICT AND THE BOSS• Manage the manager.

• Always source of conflict is a new manager

• who demands that things run differently.

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• A discussion about what is the expected level and result

• by when • and what help can you expect • At the very beginning will help

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KNOW THAT YOU CAN DO LITTLE TO CHANGE THEM.

• Being a difficult person is part of the personality and therefore do not try to change a supervisor, . Instead, change the way that you approach the behavior.

• Avoiding derogatory labeling, it is easy on yourself to be even angry with your boss.

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KEEP YOUR PROFESSIONAL FACE ON

Know the difference between not liking your boss and not being professional.

You don’t have to make your boss your friend or even like your boss as a person, but you do have to remain professional and get the job done and carry out their instructions dutifully as a subordinate, just as you would expect them to be professional as do their duties as a supervisor.

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WORKPLACE CONFLICT-

• Evaluate your own performance. Before you go attacking your boss, examine your own performance and ask yourself if you are doing everything right.

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HANDLING CONFLICT WITH SUBORDINATES• Conflict arise for the same reasons that you

may feel with your boss• Performance appraisal is generally the conflict

area• Insubordination is second major reason

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WORKPLACE CONFLICT- CONFLICT WITH SUBORDINATES• To handle performance issues be proactive• Define goals /and consequences of not

delivering• On insubordination- gather all facts/ document • Discuss and agree on corrective action

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GATHER ADDITIONAL SUPPORT.✕ If others share in your concern, then you have the

power of numbers behind you to give you additional persuasion power over your boss.

✕ It is often easy for a supervisor to ignore or attack one employee, but it becomes more difficult to attack all of his employees.

✕ He might be able to fire one of you, but he will look like an idiot (and probably get fired himself) if he tries to fire all of you. An interdepartmental union is a good way of mustering power against an abusive employer.

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WHEN TO GO UP THE CHAIN OF COMMAND - LAST RESORT.

✕Going up the chain of command is not an effective way of dealing with a difficult supervisor ✕Try to discuss issues first and only go up the chain of command as a last resort.

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WORKPLACE CONFLICT-PAT ON THE BACK

• Encourage good behavior with praise• boss and that of your subordinates-• If shy of verbal use thank you cards

• It is easy to criticize but criticisms often lead towards resentment and hostile feelings.

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WORKPLACE CONFLICT-✕ Be very careful when you criticize in

others presence.✕ Everyone likes a pat on the back for

good behavior, so you should strive to watch for good behaviors from your boss and subordinates and compliment them .

✕ Have you ever thanked your boss for sound advice?

✕ Proactive praising is much more effective than reactive criticisms.

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LEAVE WORK AT WORK.• Leave work at work. • If you choose to stay with a toxic BOSS , then

document everything. • This will be the main ammunition should a

complaint ever be filed . • Maintain performance review record.

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WORKPLACE CONFLICT- LEAVE WORK AT WORK.

✕ Get into the habit of leaving work at home and not bringing it into personal life;

It will only add to your level of stress. ✕ Keep your professional life separate from

personal life as best as you can. ✕ This also includes having friends who you

don’t work with so that you can detach yourself from your work life rather than bringing it home with you.

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WORKPLACE CONFLICT IN VALUES -

Downsizing or winding up of a business

Layoff / Termination of employees due to cost cutting

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ETHICAL ISSUES-

• Harassment • Bribe• Tax evasions

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CONFLICT RESOLUTION-BIBLICAL REF• Jesus said, “Blessed are the peacemakers for

they shall be called the children of God”(Matthew 5.9).

• Peacemakers enter into conflict with a commitment to bring God’s goodness out of that situation, however terrible it might be.

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CONFLICT TRANSFORMATION• Today the phrase “conflict transformation” has

been used to describe the various processes whereby people and nations seek to establish constructive and positive dynamics and institutions in their communities in place of the destruction and sorrow of war and civil strife.

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BIBLICAL

✕ confronting evil nonviolently, establishing justice,✕ negotiating agreements,✕ peace-building ✕ forging reconciliation.

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• In Matthew 18 Jesus says, "If another member of the church sins against you, go and point out the fault when the two of you are alone. If the member listens to you, you have regained that one. But if you are not listened to, take one or two others along with you, so that every word may be confirmed by the evidence of two or three witnesses. If the member refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if the offender refuses to listen even to the church, let such a one be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector" (Matt. 18:15-17).*

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BIBLICAL REF•

• Jesus charged his followers “to be engaged in positively transforming conflicts, for such people show themselves to be God’s children demonstrating the same care and compassion for people suffering in conflict as God has demonstrated through Christ.”

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CONFLICT RESOLUTION-BIBLICAL REF✕ POINTS OF IMPORTANCE:✕ Conciliation - 7 steps of the Social

Transformation of Conflict:✕ 1. Problem-solving, where the parties disagree

but share a problem.✕ 2. Shift from disagreement to personal

antagonism; the person is seen as the problem.

✕ 3. Issue proliferation–moving from the specific to the general, from one issue to many.

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CONFLICT RESOLUTION-BIBLICAL REF✕ 4. Triangulation–talking to other people about the

person in conflict not directly to that person. (“Triangulation” means making a triangle, in this case with two people who bring in a third person to the conflict, not as a mediator to assist in resolving the conflict, but in an effort to get the third person on one side or the other.)

✕ 5. Reaction and escalation–an eye for an eye.

✕ 6. Antagonism increasing to hostility.

✕ 7. Polarization–a change in the social organization (breaking of friendship, divorce, church split, civil war, etc.)

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✕ The further along the conflict goes through these steps there is more violence, less trust,

less accurate communication and less direct contact.

In the Genesis stories we see Adam-and Eve at step 2 where Adam is blaming both Eve and God for the problem. Cain is also at step 2 seeing Abel as the problem, but

he jumps quickly to step 7 in committing murder.

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DOMINATION

✕ Domination is where one person or group gains power that is used in a threatening or abusive way over others. Throughout the Bible violent political domination is a problem, whether looking at the oppressions of Pharaoh in Egypt or Samuel’s concerns about establishing a king in Israel (see 1 Samuel 8). The climax of this violent domination is

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DEMON OR DIVINE?• seen in Revelation 13 , 13.1.7 depicts • Both demonic and divine governments -

mixture of both the divinely-established and the demonic.

• Some governments may exhibit more of the demonic nature in their destructive behavior, while other governments may not

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THE 50 GREATEST BUSINESS CONFLICTS OF ALL TIME

✕ Thomas Edison electrocuted an elephant to demonstrate the danger of a competitor's technology.

✕ Nike , desperate for an advantage over a surging

Reebok, signed a college hoops player named Michael Jordan.

✕ Central Pacific Railroad laid an astounding 10 miles of track in 24 hours to grab government payments that the hated Union Pacific would otherwise claim

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THE 50 GREATEST BUSINESS CONFLICTS OF ALL TIME• What comes through most strongly in these

stories is sheer human intensity.

• Only a brave novelist would have imagined the brother vs. brother saga of Adidas vs. Puma

• Venice vs. Genoa They may look like a dusty tale of feuding city-states, but it set the tone for hundreds of years of European competition. 176

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THE 50 GREATEST BUSINESS CONFLICTS OF ALL TIME• Rivalries make great stories, and the greatest

rivalries make the greatest tales -- reason enough to read the following portraits of brilliance, skullduggery, nobility, mendacity, victory, and failure.

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• After all, monumental business battles have changed the world.

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• If tiny MCI hadn't challenged the titanic AT&T the communications revolution would have played out much differently.

• Steve Jobs and Bill Gates ended up selling few competing products yet contended for 35 years to impose radically different visions of computing.

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THE 50 GREATEST BUSINESS CONFLICTS OF ALL TIME• And a global economy that couldn't function

without air travel is far faster and better because Airbus and Boeing ( BA 0.82% ) (No. 9) have had to fight each other every day for 40 years.

• Functional

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• Coke ( KO -0.08% ) and Pepsi ( PEP 0.65% ) were so busy pounding the daylights out of each other that they missed an entirely new notion, and today, inconceivably, the bestselling energy drink in U.S. convenience stores isn't made by either company. (It's Red Bull.)

• Dysfunctional

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• General Motors and Ford clashed with each other until one day Toyota ( TM 1.89% ) had stolen the bulk of their profits.

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• The rivalry between the American railroads was economic, ethnic, and spectacular, involving sabotage, deception, and death. Who needs such lessons?

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• Oh, right, we do. So think of these dramas as guilt-free pleasures. Then, well prepared for the task, go forth and pulverize your rivals. --Geoff Colvin

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ACCEPT THE SITUATION

• Conflict is not mathematics• There is not always a solution

waiting to be found• If there is a solution – it is very

unlikely to be the only one

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AND FINALLY…. CONFLICT CANNOT ALWAYS BE SOLVED OR AVOIDEDThe Swiss psychologist Carl Jung once wrote that

“the greatest and most important problems of life are all

fundamentally insoluble. They can never be solved but only outgrown”

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AND FINALLY…. NOT EVERY CONFLICT IS NEGATIVE

• Not every conflict is negative (sometimes it “clears the air”)

• The important thing is to keep wasteful and damaging conflict to a minimum and when conflict occurs, use the techniques to resolve or at least minimize it

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WHAT DID WE LEARN? In workplace or personal

conflicts it is all about difference in perspective

• Approaches to Conflict Resolution include;

• Avoidance• Collaboration• Compromise• Competition• Accommodation

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WHAT DID WE LEARN? • Win Win solutions build relationships

and aid solutions• Conflict is not mathematics but

deals with personalities and emotions

• There is not always a solution waiting to be found

• If there is a solution – it is very unlikely to be the only one

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