Happy family 1

Ignite Christian Leaders worldwide to lead others to participate in the life of the Trinity by breaking down barriers prohibiting a growing healthy relationship with God the Father.

Our Mission

Through Discipleship & Evangelism

Our Mission

Creating a Healthy and Happy Family

营造一个健康和幸福的家庭

Cross Cultural Definition of a Healthy and Happy Family健康和幸福家庭的文化内涵

FAMILY 家庭

WORLD CULTURE 世界文

化 ETHNIC CULTURE

民族文化

Neil Postman “Informing Ourselves to Death”

Speech /world.std.com page 4

INNOCENT

清白

POWER权能

HONOR

尊荣

Roland Muller Honor & Shame: Unlocking the Door

罗兰 · 马勒《尊贵与羞耻：打开大门》

Family Types and Influences

家庭环境与其影响

A Healthy Family健康家庭

A healthy family has a clear, positive self-concept, deep mutual affection, and happiness skills such as conflict resolution. The parents have come to a healthy resolution concerning early family experience.健康的家庭环境给人清晰、积极的自我观，成员之间彼此深深相爱，了解使人快乐的技巧，好比如何解决冲突等等。父母从自身的家庭环境中已经得知怎样是健康的人际关系。

POSITIVE SELF-CONCEPT积极肯定的自我观

Happiness Skills获得快乐的技巧

“ . . . marriage is not a game of chance. Once we show people that marriage is a relationship built upon communication skills, that’s what changes attitude about divorce.”

“…… 婚姻并不是在碰运气。我们只要让大家知道婚姻是建立在沟通技巧之上的关系，人们就会改变对离婚的态度。”

Diane Sollee 黛安 ·索利American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy

美国婚姻与家庭治疗联会

Divorce and Differences离婚和差异的原因总结

1. Infidelity 不忠 50%2. No longer in love 不再相爱3. Emotional Problems 情绪问题4. Financial Problems 经济问题5. Physical Abuse 身体虐待6. Alcohol 酗酒 . . . .10. Communication 沟通

1. Communication 沟通

2. Conflict Resolution 冲突化解

3. Sexual Harmony 性生活协调

4. Quality Time Together 夫妻单独相处时间

Happy Couples 80+ Studies

80+ 快乐夫妻研究• Communicate• 他们彼此沟通• Conflict resolution• 他们消转解决冲突• Time Together• 他们有单独相处的时光• Feel worthwhile• 他们感到自己有价值

CONFUSED SELF-CONCEPT困惑不清的自我观

PERFORMANCE-BASED FAMILIES以注重表现为主的家庭

A Performance-based Family以注重表现为主的家庭

A performance only family has evident affection, limited happiness skills, and unclear self-concepts. The parents have passed on the performance only values.以注重表现为主的家庭给人有被爱的感觉、也了解一定的快乐技巧，但是令人形成一种困惑不清的自我观。父母本身的家庭环境注重表现，也把这种价值观传递给下一代。

WHAT IS A VERY UNHEALTHY FAMILY?

不健康的家庭是什么样子？

DEFINITION定义

A very unhealthy family is one where a child is subjected to abnormal, long term stresses that create emotional neglect in the home. The child must frequently resort to unhealthy habits to protect himself or herself. 不健康家庭中的孩子长期受到不正常的精神压力，致使孩子的情感完全被忽略。因此，孩子常常凭借不健康的习惯来保护自己。

If this stress continues for a long time, the child will carry these child-like habits into adulthood, and usually respond under adult stresses like they were still back in the home.假如某种精神压力持续很长时间，孩子会把这些孩提时的习惯带入成年期，在面对成年人的压力时，反应方式就像在小时在家中一样。

Abnormal Stress develops Defenses

raises Same

Defenses

Adult

Stress

防御机制发展成

不正常的压力

正常的孩子

相同的防御机制

形成

压力

成年人

The Family Issues 家庭问题

Are you able or unable?通常你能信任别人吗？

The Family Issues 家庭问题

Are they experienced or ignored?你忽略自己的情绪吗？

The Family Issues 家庭问题

Can you give and receive?你会安慰别人和接受安慰吗？