Issler Dainze CSM Presentation

No Longer killing everyone that isn’t voting for Issler Dainze..

While Issler Dainze was in the CSM 2 and 3 no small animals or children were permanently injured!

Things Issler Dainze brought to Eve entirely by herself as part of previous CSMS!

• 3D graphics• Mining• Combat• Trade• Massive Economy• T2• T3 • Wormholes• Stations• Lllamas• Alliance tournament!

Other Issler Dainze Inventions!

• Gravity!• Time!

Warning Code 09AFF - Truth misalignment detected! Error Logged!

Issler Dainze is “Mostly Harmless” and won’t make Eve any worse!

• Truth parameter reconfiguration in• 5• 4• 3• 2• 1

System Status Message Code 077AAC Truth Negation Feature now disabled

The other CSM Candidates Analyzed:

1. Secretly conspiring to flood the stations with neurotoxin2. Also planning on harming small animals and children3. But not the small animals and children the pilots of Eve want to injure!4. Those will be given

1. Favorite foods!2. Large amounts of currency!3. Groomed if appropriate4. Invited to a party with cake!

5.The other candidates like to play WoW!

Not voting for Issler Dainze can cause:

• Loss of sleep• fear of liquids• invisible friends that delete programs from your DVR• hair loss• unwanted hair growth• hair loss• unwanted hair growth• unnatural interest in egg laying mammals• Speaking with a French Accent!• and failure to get cake

Vote For Issler Dainze and there will be:

• A party• Cake!• Grief Counseling!!

• Fatal System Error Encountered – 067EEH – Truth Processor Overload• Error log line written• Rebooting political science engine

• System message 08ffA – gas emitters online• System Action 09f97A – Paging laboratory staff to lounge• Biometric monitoring array active• Event trap – Waiting for staff arrival• Trigger door locks• Emit biotoxin• Data logging enabled