View
1
Download
0
Category
Preview:
Citation preview
April and May 1, 2016
Support for child, infant and pregnancy loss
Volume 4 Issue 25
Pathways
Miss our last newsletter?
All newsletters can be
viewed on our website.
For a hard copy, contact
our office.
“Because the path of grief after losing a child should never be walked alone”™
Mailing Address: P.O. Box 382 Dayton, VA 22821
Physical address: 195 Main Street Dayton, VA 22821
www.sadierosefoundation.org ~ 540-810-0307~ office@sadierosefoundation.org
Support groups, Internet community, One-on-one lay counseling, Remembrance events
* If you would like to
share your story of loss
and how the Sadie Rose
Foundation has impacted
your grief journey, please
contact our office.
* If you know of someone
who might benefit from
the support we offer,
please help us make the
connection.
Lauren Jefferson and Kassandra
Galloway contributed to this
newsletter.
Our mission: To
provide emotional
and spiritual
support to families
and individuals
grieving the death
of a child, because
the path of grief
after losing a child
should never be
walked alone.™
Current Needs
If you have any of the
following you no
longer need, please
consider SRF.
*Kitchen silverware
*Dishes and bowls
*Pots and pans
THANK YOU for
all you’ve already
provided!
We are grateful for the donation we received In Loving
Memory of Tanner Brooks Morris, From Jerry, Sandy,
Kelsea and Aubree Morris.
This month’s newsletter is sponsored by Dr. Cathy Slusher in loving
memory of her son, David, who was stillborn May 12, 1987.
“Thank you for this opportunity to celebrate my son,” she writes.
SRF Walk, Run, and Fun Day!
Formerly known as the annual Sadie Rose 5K
Please read thoroughly, as multiple changes have been
made for this year’s event!
Because our event has moved from a less competitive event into a community remem-
brance event, we wanted to accommodate those changes. Instead of setting up/starting
at Wilbur Pence Middle School, our staging area will be at the College Street Pavil-
ion 360 College Street Dayton, VA. However, free parking is available at Wilbur Pence
Middle School. We ask that you park there and walk down to the pavilion.
This will be a NON-TIMED event! If you would like to track your time, please be pre-
pared to do that on your own. We will have a celebratory finish line where families and
teams can cross the finish line together.
We will have prizes for the first overall male and first overall female, but we will not
have the age-group awards. Instead, every person registered for the walk will be en-
tered into a raffle to win lots of generous prizes.
We are pre-selling raffle tickets for $10 each! You don’t have to be present to win
and you can also purchase tickets the day of the event. All prizes are valued at $200 and
up and include a set of outdoor chairs donated by Premier Vinyl in Bridgewater valued
at $432! (Winner chooses color.) A 35 quart ice blue Yeti cooler, a $372 value! A
Playstation 4 with 2 wireless controllers, a $395 value!A Canon EOS Rebel T5 DSLR
Camera with EF-S 18-55mm IS II Lens + Focus Telephoto and Wide Angle Lens + 32GB
Memory Card + Extra Battery Pack + Deluxe Acc, a $420 value! There might be addi-
tional prizes in this category, and tickets will be drawn after the walk.
We will also have raffles tables for smaller items at the event. If you would like to con-
tribute gift certificates, service certificates, product, or donate money for us to purchase
prizes, please email us at srfwalkrun@gmail.com or call Regina at 540-421-6458.
There will be complimentary refreshments available as well as opportunities to pur-
chase food from Mama’s Caboose. Children’s activities. And more! Register online at
http://sadierosefoundation.org/ or use the enclosed registration form.
One-on-one support is available at our office by appointment. Call Regina at 540-810-4351 or
email regina@sadierosefoundation to schedule a time.
We also have several private Facebook groups, one for bereaved parents and one for those
who are pregnant after a loss. This is in addition to our public Facebook page. Feel free to
request to join these groups that apply.
Parents who are willing to talk if you are interested
Frank Bennett—540–383-9082—lost infant. Frank also has a bereaved dad’s support forum
on Facebook called “Daddy’s Breath.”
Tanya Bennett—540-383-9077—also on Facebook. Lost infant
Daniel and Naomi Lambert—540-433-8894—lost two infants. Also have teenagers as sibling
support
Anita Thompson—540-209-3251—also on Facebook. Grandparent/parent support
Lee Harlow—540-480-4928 and Regina Harlow—540-810-4351—also on Facebook. Lost
infant
Suzy LaBonte—540-833-4185—HopeForLife@juno.com. Lost teenager. Hosts a support
group called “Lanterns of Hope” for those who have lost a loved one to suicide.
Angie Magenhofer—momofclbl@gmail.com—also on Facebook. Stillbirth and miscarriage
Laura Riggleman—540-282-1633. Stillbirth and miscarriage support.
Deborah Bellesheep-Thompson—djthompson1229@aol.com—540-820-3446. Lost young
adult child.
If you would like to be added to this list as a volunteer support contact, please contact us.
Page 2 Pathways
Additional support
For Miscarriage Support ~ Contact
Brittany Bates at 540-421-3881 or
brittanylbates@gmail.com.
May 9: Bereaved Parent Support
Meeting, Adults only, 7 p.m. Sadie Rose
House. For parents who have lost a child of
any age.
May 12: Coffee Open House, Sadie Rose
House 9:30—11:30 a.m.. Come and go as you
please. ***Children are usually present at
this event.
May 27: Bereaved Family Support
Meeting. Sadie Rose office, 7 p.m.
Sibling support and childcare available.
Families welcome.
One-on-One appointments available by
contacting Regina at 540-421-6458 or
regina@sadierosefoundation.org.
Coffee Open House is held the second
Thursday of each month, Bereaved Parent
Meetings the second Monday and Bereaved
Family Meetings the fourth Friday. Some
exceptions apply, so check our website,
calendar, and Facebook page often. For more
information about any of our events, please
contact our office.
Support Meeting Schedule
Current Collectibles
We are often asked what donated items would help us. We will
suggest a focus each month of an item/items that help in our
support efforts. Current Collectibles: Gift cards, products,
service certificates, as well as chocolate chip and oatmeal
raisin cookies, all for our Walk, Run, and Fun Day.
Have you considered attending one of our support group meetings? We know that
taking that first step can be the hardest. Consider asking a friend or family member
to come with you. Another way to lesson the anxiety of showing up for the first time
is to connect with people online in our “Additional Support” section below or on our
online support chat. With the exception of our Miscarriage Support Group, our
groups are open to those who have lost a child of any age. All our meetings are held
at 195 Main Street Dayton, VA 22821. Please let us know how we can best support
you on your grief journey.
What to expect at our
Support Meetings
Currently all support group meet-
ings are held at the Sadie Rose
House 195 Main Street Dayton,
across the street from Dayton
Church of the Brethren. Our be-
reaved parent meetings and be-
reaved family meetings are both fa-
cilitated by Regina Cyzick Harlow.
All our meetings are informal. No
one is expected or required to talk
unless they choose to do so. Most
every meeting begins with casual
conversation. Throughout the meet-
ing, you can expect moments of
tears and times of laughter. Some-
times we talk about our children and
our losses and sometimes we talk
simply as friends. The meetings are
not scripted and sometimes there are
moments of comfortable silence in
the presence of those who under-
stand. Please consider bringing a
friend if that would be helpful.
It's so curious: one can resist
tears and 'behave' very well in the
hardest hours of grief. But then
someone makes you a friendly
sign behind a window, or one no-
tices that a flower that was in bud
only yesterday has suddenly
blossomed, or a letter slips from a
drawer... and everything collaps-
es. ~Colette
When someone you love dies, and
you're not expecting it, you don't
lose her all at once; you lose her in
pieces over a long time -- the way
the mail stops coming, and her
scent fades from the pillows and
even from the clothes in her closet
and drawers. Gradually, you ac-
cumulate the parts of her that are
gone. Just when the day comes --
when there's a particular missing
part that overwhelms you with the
feeling that she's gone, forever --
there comes another day, and an-
other specifically missing part.
~ John Irving
Page 3 Pathways
Nicole Nicholson
Sunrise: April 1, 1991
Sunset: February 16, 2009
Hannah Mae Lewis
Sunrise: April 1, 1998
Sunset: October 28, 2012
Tanner Brooks Morris
Sunrise: April 5, 1990
Sunset: March 29, 2012
Iliana Rose Strickler
Sunrise: April 5,1998
Sunset: August 30, 2007
Atum-Ra Kemet
Sunrise: April 5, 2012
Sunset: July 9, 2012
Ricky Valencia
Sunrise: April 6, 995
Sunset: August 8, 2011
Zachary Levi Swartley
Sunrise: April 11, 2014
Sunset: April11, 2014
Bethany Lynn Thompson
Sunrise: April12, 2005
Sunset: April 12, 2005
Kayle Elizabeth Selkirk
Sunrise: July 16, 2004
Sunset: April 12, 2007
Mason Daniel Lambert
Sunrise: April 14, 005
Sunset: May 7, 2005
Jude Blackburn
Sunrise: April 15, 2007
Sunset: July 26, 2009
Kaitlyn Caldwell
Sunrise: April 26, 2013
Sunset: April 15, 2014
Bralyn Davis-Vest
Sunrise: December 17, 2013
Sunset: April 15, 2014
Ethan Wagner
Sunrise: August 4, 1988
Sunset: April 17, 2010
Matty Bolton
Sunrise: April 18, 2012
Sunset: April 18, 2012
Julian Santana White
Sunrise: April 19, 2009
Sunset: December 4, 2013
Ava Grace Broyles
Sunrise: April 21, 2009
Sunset: April 21, 2009
Grace Barnhart
Sunrise: April 22, 2014
Sunset: April 22, 2014
Gregory Andrew Nichols
Sunrise: April 25, 1990
Sunset: March 2, 2012
Holly Beth White
Sunrise: May 23, 1991
Sunset: April 27, 2014
Cody Scott Miller
Sunrise: April 30, 2014
Sunset: May 1, 2014
Logan Reedy
Sunrise: May 1, 2009
Sunset: December 26, 2011
Ryan Azel Shank
Sunrise: May 2, 2013
Sunset: May 2, 2013
Alicia Nicole Dove
Sunrise: May 4, 1990
Sunset: August 1, 2011
Shawn Mantz
Sunrise: May 4, 2008
Sunset: August 29, 2010
Camden Lee Magenhofer
Sunrise: May 5, 2009
Sunset: May 5, 2009
Emmaline Carolinda Ross
Sunrise: May 8, 2010
Sunset: May 8, 2010
Gwenyth Graham Carpenter
Sunrise: March 17, 2010
Sunset: May 14, 2010
Brooklyn Wood
Sunrise: May 17, 2001
Sunset: May 17, 2001
Camden Katherine Lafkin
Sunrise: February 14, 2012
Sunset: May 17, 2012
Dominic Shank
Sunset: May 20, 2010
Sunset: May 20, 2010
Jameson Andrew Lam
Sunrise: August 15, 2007
Sunset: May 20, 2012
Joshua Thomas Davis
Sunrise: February 25, 2002
Sunset: May 27, 2012
Daniela Irene Wine
Sunrise: May 28, 1998
Sunset: August 26, 1998
Amaya Johnson
Sunrise: May 31, 2010
Sunset: May 31, 2010
If you would like your child to be included
in the month of their sunrise (birth) and the
month of their sunset (death), or to have
them removed from this list, please email
office@sadierosefoundation or mail your
request to P.O. Box 382 Dayton, VA 22821.
Remembering
On April, 17, 2016, Regina Cyzick Harlow was ordained into
Christian ministry through the Church of the Brethren
denomination. This has been three years of classes and an
additional year of preparation and training. With this training,
Regina has already provided funeral services for children whose
families did not have pastoral support or a church home. This also
provides additional opportunities to be available at hospitals and
medical offices in the role as clergy when requests are made. Regina
looks forward to continuing to serve all those grieving the death of a
child, regardless of their faith background. (Photo: District Executive Minister John Jantzi and Regina Cyzick Harlow. Photo Credit: Bill Wood)
The Sadie Rose Foundation is a Shenandoah Valley based non-profit organization that offers support to families that have experienced the death of a child, including through pregnancy loss and
miscarriage. All our support and outreach is free of charge. Donations appreciated. For a complete list of our services, visit our website and click on the “Support and Outreach” tab or contact our
office at 540-810-0307, office@sadierosefoundation.org, www.sadierosefoundation.org.
The Sadie Rose Foundation
P.O. Box 382
Dayton, VA 22821
April May 2016
By Regina Cyzick Harlow
My husband tried, he really did. But
the first Mother’s Day after Sadie died
proved there was room for better commu-
nication between us. He was still in bed
when I walked downstairs that Sunday
morning and saw, of all things, a large
beautiful fern with a bow and a card tied
to the hanger. I cried so hard I fell to my
knees.
Now before I sound ungrateful, I need
to give some background to my experi-
ence with live plants and Sadie’s death.
You see, I love plants; I just can’t keep
them alive. When Sadie died, people sent
the most beautiful live plants and rose-
bushes I had ever seen, but within sever-
al months, I had successfully killed them
all.
Every plant that died was another
painful reminder of Sadie’s death. It was-
n’t the fault of the wonderful caring peo-
ple who had given such thoughtful gifts;
it was simply that I didn’t have “the
touch.” I felt like a failure. I thought I
had communicated that to Lee, but here,
on my first “Angel” Mother’s Day was a
formidable fern. So without my baby girl
to hold that Sunday morning, I was also
painfully aware of the fate of that fern. It
eventually joined all the other dead
plants on the compost pile. I determined
that from that time forward, it was per-
fectly okay to request no plants. Howev-
er, the fact that Lee remembered Sadie
with me and acknowledged her life in a
special way on Mother’s Day meant a lot.
Besides having her child back, there’s
nothing a mother wants more than to
have her deceased child remembered and
her role as a mother validated. We have
not forgotten our children that have died,
so remembering them with us is one of
the best Mother’s Day gifts you can give.
Here are some suggestions for the
mothers in your life who are
grieving the death of a child.
Keep it simple. A smile, a hug, and a
card that says “Thinking of you this
Mother’s Day” will mean the world.
If you wish, you can add something
like “Remembering (child’s name)
with you on this Mother’s Day.”
A gift basket with some of her favor-
ite snacks or beauty supplies is
great. Include a journal and write a
few positive hopeful thoughts in the
front for her to reflect on. Add a re-
membrance candle for her to light on
special days such as Mother’s Day.
A stuffed animal can be wonderful -
something small-to-medium in size
that she can sit on a shelf, sleep
with, keep in her car, wherever it
brings her comfort.
Make a donation to a charity in her
child’s name.
Plant a tree. Obviously, not everyone
faces the horticultural challenges
that I do, so for some, a live plant or
tree might be a wonderful way to
remember a child on Mother’s Day.
But before giving a live plant or any
other gift, consider the lifestyle and
personality of the recipient.
Don’t push her to attend banquets,
functions or meals that might over-
whelm her.
Don’t try to ignore it, fix it, make it
better or explain it away. Mother’s
Day without your child is difficult at
best. Instead of saying things to try
to make it better, just let her know
you care.
Most importantly, be there for her.
Ask her if she wants to talk about
her child (most moms do.) Then lis-
ten.
Connect With Us!
If you would like to receive
meeting reminders, weather
cancellations, and other
occasional communications
from SRF, please use the
following instructions. This is
one of the most effective ways
to remind you of meetings
and meeting changes. Stand-
ard text messaging rates may
apply.
SRF Connections: General
information reminders: Send a
text to 81010 and for the mes-
sage, type @srfconnect.
Fourth Friday Family Meetings:
Send text to 81010 and type
@fourthfrid.
Second Monday Parent Meetings:
Send text to 81010 and type
@secondmon.
THE STORY OF THE FERN
With tips for Mother’s Day after a child has died
Recommended