Scraps of Wisdom Business Truisms & Advice for those who toil in corporate world!

Scraps of WisdomScraps of Wisdom

Business Truisms &

Advice for those who toil in corporate

world!

First ScrapFirst Scrap

It’s surprisingly easy to give a short oral presentation or even write an entire newsletter article, using only one of the following “scraps”.

Give it a try. . . Use my scraps to jump start a story from your own life.

It’s Like Tarot. . .It’s Like Tarot. . .

Take this presentation to a creative brainstorming meeting.

“Shuffle the deck” and have people give a one minute story about the scrap they pulled.

Let the Scrapping Begin!Let the Scrapping Begin!

Click to begin. . . .

Effort does not Equal ResultsBeware of shallow vision statements

like:• “Effort Equals Results” &• “Pride in our People”.

When selecting a company to work with, look for depth

& intelligence, not slogans.

Effort does not equal Results

Working long hours doesn’t prove anything without results.

Effort does not equal Results

Don’t work for a company where you are paid for effort. Work where you are recognized for results.

Effort Does Not Equal Results.

If you spend all of your time at work, you are not hard-working.

You are boring.

Effort Does not Equal Results

Do not work on weekends.Do not work more than 40 hours

per week.Remember, we advanced

technology so that we would have more time to evolve our consciousness.

Effort does not equal results

A happy employee doesn’t necessarily make a good employee, but a good employee is a happy employee. Focus your efforts on good work.

ClientsClients

Always learn about your customers, no matter what your job is.

SecretariesSecretaries

Be nice to secretaries. Their job description, essentially, is to help people. Make it easy for secretaries to do their jobs.

BossesBosses

Don’t let your guard down around your boss. Ever.

Overheard ComplimentsOverheard Compliments

Compliment somebody behind their back.

Compliments heard second-hand have more credibility with the intended recipient.

Overheard ComplimentsOverheard Compliments

Compliment somebody everyday. Period.

Overheard ComplimentsOverheard Compliments

Everybody responds to flattery.

SimplifySimplify

Simplify everything. Your life, your home, your office, your desk, your processes, vision, policy, procedures. Everything.

SolutionsSolutions

Don’t take a problem to a meeting without a solution. Your job is to fix problems, not complain.

ChangeChange

Believe that change can happen.

VictoryVictory

There are no defeats. What some people see as defeat is actually a valuable learn-ing experience. And that, as any cheerleader knows, is a victory.

WaitingWaiting

When waiting in a lobby, don’t just sit. Explore, read, talk - - - use this time to learn.

ShoesShoes

Wear comfortable yet attractive shoes. Keep them clean at all times.

Telephone NumbersTelephone Numbers

Carry important phone numbers with you at all times.

DeadlinesDeadlines

Don’t be late. Apologize if you are, and be prepared to accept consequences.

Missives from on HighMissives from on High

Re-organization memos grandly outline sweeping changes in the company.

Remember the adage, “same old horses, same old glue.”

Missives from on HighMissives from on High

Vision and mission statements are not nearly as important as knowing what to do when you show up for work.

Missives from on HighMissives from on High

Executive memos are political fantasies. They have little to do with reality. Real change is always due to an outside force.

Missives from on HighMissives from on High

Employees always know what’s really going on. The internal information in an executive memo is hardly a surprise. The rumors are usually true.

Missives from on HighMissives from on High

The business should shape the organization, not the other way around.

Missives from on HighMissives from on High

Real activity takes place between the lines in the org chart.

OfficeOffice

Stay out of the office as much as you can. Be with customers or prospects.

WashroomWashroom

Don’t be seen taking magazines into the executive washroom.

WashroomWashroom

Beware of a false sense of importance. When you think you’re too busy to use the washroom, ask yourself if two minutes of work is really worth risking your health.

TimeTime

Treat time as if someone is paying you for your contribution. Someone is.

Business CardsBusiness Cards

Carry business cards with you at all times. Give them out freely.

Phone CallsPhone Calls

Never leave a phone call unanswered for more than 24 hours.

ClothesClothes

Wear timeless, classic clothes. Wool, silk and cotton are natural favorites.

AmbiguityAmbiguity

Life is uncertain - develop a high tolerance for ambiguity.

AmbiguityAmbiguity

Avoid dotted-line reporting relationships.

BrainstormingBrainstorming

Write down your best ideas before they get lost in the shuffle of all the good ideas!

BrainstormingBrainstorming

Don’t tell people that their ideas are bad, especially if you don’t have a better one.

AcronymsAcronyms

1. Don’t use acronyms.2. Don’t invent any

more!

StrategyStrategy

Never say, “It’s not my job.”

PresentationsPresentations

If you want to lose your audience, show them slides with columns of numbers. Refuse to tell them a story about the meaning of the numbers.

PresentationsPresentations

Do not read your speech or presentation.

Instead, read your audience.

MeetingsMeetings

Do not attend more than two meetings a day, or else you will never get any real work done.

OfficeOffice

Leave the office building at least once a day.

ParadoxParadox

Manage the paradox of being fully committed to where you are, while remaining open to other opportunities.

AcronymsAcronyms

If TQM, CIP, CRM or any other new acronym doesn’t produce measureable results within a year, dump it.

SuccessSuccess

The most interesting people I know are successful.

ProblemsProblems

Work on problems, not symptoms.Morale is never a problem, it is

always a symptom. No company should ever have a morale officer. If they do, it’s a sign that they are going down the toilet.

HobbiesHobbies

Try to make your hobby your life’s work.

Performance EvaluationsPerformance Evaluations

Performance evaluations take place every day, not once a year.

The Company PartyThe Company Party

Part I: Always attend the company party. (sigh)

Part II: Never get drunk at the company party. (sigh)

The Company PartyThe Company Party

Be specific when you order a drink. Name the label.

Speaker PhoneSpeaker Phone

A conference call, driving, or a broken neck are the only 3 reasons for you to use a speaker phone.

MannersManners

Don’t treat people as if they have died when they get laid off.

PowerPower

Lord Acton was wrong. Power doesn’t corrupt. The illusion of power is the result of corruption.

NepotismNepotism

The owner can produce children in his own image, but alas! These children have no light of their own. Together, parent and child hold the infinite reflection of opposing video cams.

Tunnel Vision.

AdvertisingAdvertising

Being creative is merely compulsory. In advertising, the audience is essential and the offer is everything.

AdvertisingAdvertising

Copy is King - Design is Queen. Together, they rule.

Jingles and special effects are court jesters. They live to serve their masters.