S AFE HARBOR MARRIAGES

SAFEHARBORMARRIAGES

WEEK 1 - Seaworthy Relationships

4 Part Series

WEEK 1 - Seaworthy RelationshipsWEEK 2 - Safe HarborWEEK 3 - Harbor AlarmsWEEK 4 - Dockworkers

3 Stabilizers

• The Hull• The Keel

• The Ballast

The Hull

Width of hull • increases stability and • decreases risk of capsizing

The Hull“To Vee or Not to Vee” Show me the narrow life of a guarded

person

and I’ll show you one easily capsized.

Genesis 2:24

“God said it was NOT GOOD for man to be alone.”

Ecclesiastes 4:9

“Two are better than one.”

1 Corinthians 12:21

The eye cannot say to the hand, "I have no need of you,"

nor again the head to the feet, "I have no need of you."

What diminishes openness?

• Something about you (real/imagined)• Something about me (real/imagined)

What should I do?

• Reach (Proverbs 18:1)

“Whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire; he breaks out against all

sound judgment.”

What should I do?

• Reach (Proverbs 18:1)• Speak (Ephesians 4:15)

“Speak the truth in love”

Have you heard these?

• “Keel over”• “Keep an even keel”• “Keel hauling”

The Keel

Counteracts• Tipping • Drifting • WindMoves the boat

forward

Kneel for Keel

Spiritual depth:• Prevents tip &

drift against adversity

• Moves us forward

Matt 13:20-21

sown on rocky ground, this is the one who hears the word and immedi-

ately receives it with joy, yet he has no root in himself, but endures for a

while, and when tribulation or persecution arises on account of the

word, immediately he falls away.

Hebrews 2:1

Therefore we must pay much closer attention to what we have heard, lest

we drift away from it.

Ephesians 3:17

“That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and

grounded in love”

Keel Lest Capsize

1 Cor. 10:13 No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man but God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.

Isaiah 40:28-31Have you not known? Have you not heard?

The Lord is the everlasting God,the Creator of the ends of the earth.

He does not faint or grow weary;his understanding is unsearchable.

He gives power to the faint,And to him who has no might he increases strength.

Isaiah 40:28-31Even youths shall faint and be weary,

and young men shall fall exhausted;but they who wait for the Lord shall renew

their strength;they shall mount up with wings like eagles;they shall run and not be weary;they shall walk and not faint.

Ballast• Lowers the point of gravity • Rights the boat

Ballast: Responsibility

Ballast is affixed to & held by the keel

Matthew 7:5

“Take the beam out of your own eye”

1 Corinthians 11:28

“Let a man examine himself”

1 Timothy 4:16

“Take heed to yourself”

Dr. Robert & Muriel McQuilken’s “Boat”

Dr. Robert McQuilken’s “Boat”

By 1993, Muriel could no longer recognize Robert…

“Love is said to evaporate if the relationship is not mutual, if it’s not physical, if the other person doesn’t communicate, or if one party doesn’t carry his or her share of the load.

“When I hear the litany of essentials for a happy marriage, I count off what my beloved can no longer contribute, and I contemplate how truly mysterious love is.”

• He cared for her until her death in September, 2003.

Freight for the Journey• Broaden your Hull

• Deepen your Keel

• Lower your Ballast

• Risk more openness

• Kneel your will

• Be responsible & aware