Professional Boundaries in Ministry Fall Theological Conference

Professional Boundaries in Ministry

Fall Theological Conference

Rick Loseth, LICSWPACT 4 Families Collaborative320 -231-7030 ext. 2976rick_l@pactforfamilies.org

Welcome

Purpose of Morning

•spend a couple of hours in discussion on the broad topic of “professional boundaries”

•how “electronic communication” has impacted boundaries and your ministry

Introductions• Who’s here• Length of time in paid ministry• Less than 5 yrs• 5 to 10 yrs• 10 to 15 yrs• 15 plus yrs

• Ordained Pastor

• Youth Minister

• Serve as the only pastor at your church

• Serve with another pastor or other staff

Boundaries • What are Boundaries?o They help define space, what is yours or mine, how we

do or not do, etc.oBoundaries are the defining space which clarifies “you”

and “me”oHelp to make sure we are using time, space, things,

feelings and relationships in the most appropriate wayoHelp ensure the best use of things, use that is consistent

with our intentions, and with their original purposeoBoundaries provide for safe connections between

individuals

Boundaries • Boundaries involves Self DisciplineoAre the limits we place on ourselves (discipline)o The limits we place around ourselves (prevent invasion

of space, etc)

• Boundaries help clarify and communicate our intentions

oAgreements with what is appropriate, what is not (cultural influences)

oBoundaries are not arbitraryoBoundaries can also be confusing

(cultural, family of origin)

Boundaries • Boundaries ultimately convey Respect• Are reasons for boundaries• Setting limits, making agreements in

relationships, is an essential way of loving our neighbors as ourselves• Is also the recognition that my actions have

potential to be positive or negative• Is the recognition that my actions have potential

to be positive or negative

Boundaries -summary

• Boundaries involve your belief system, values, morals, emotions, and your life experiences

• Healthy boundaries serve to define who you are, contain you and protect you

• Boundaries are the guidelines that assist you with appropriate closeness and separateness in relations with self and others

Boundaries and Relationships

• Managing our professional relationships are essential to being effective in our jobs

• Professional Boundaries are intended to create safe, positive connections with those we are involved with

• Is critically important – our ‘clients’ are all struggling at some level with ‘boundaries’…

Professional vs. Personal Relationships

Professional Personal

Professional vs. Personal Relationships

ProfessionalPaid Training Education

Job Description Time Limited Power Imbalance Supervision Can “choose clients” Confidentiality Goals/purpose Records Licensure Defined place/time to meet

Professional vs. Personal Relationships ProfessionalPower is unequalSelf disclosure - one wayGenerally time-limitedMeeting location definedTime limited/ session timesPaid for timeTraining/education requiredProfessional standards LicensureRecords keptSpecific Goals

PersonalAims at equal powerTwo way self-disclosureCan last foreverCan meet anywhereNo time limitsUnpaidNo training requiredNo defined standardsNo licensure neededNo records keptNo goals

Professional – Personal - Ministerial Relationships

Professional Personal MinisterialWhat is unique about a “Ministerial” relationship as

compared to the other two?

What blurs the lines between personal professional ministerial relationships?

What changes in a “ministry” relationship?

Does it change?

Professional – Personal - Ministerial

RelationshipsHow does “power” influence

relationships for those in ministry?

How does our “power” influence communication with members in the congregation? When doing the talking?

When doing the listening?

Communication -

• All communication has rules – some explicit, others implicit

•What are some of these “rules”?• For speaking• For writing

A Continuum of Boundary Keeping

Clear / Blurring of / Boundary Boundary Boundaries Violation

ALWAYS O.K. / SOMETIMES O.K. / NEVER O.K___

How has electronic communication impacted the way we communicate?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0eUeL3n7fDsThe Social Media Revolution 2012

What has changed?................

• Expectations• Time•Access• Feedback/non-verbal•How else??

How have the changes in electronic communication affected…..• Your ministry• how you relate to others in the congregation• how you relate to other church staff

• Your congregation• How the congregation communicates

“formally” • How the congregation communicates

“informally”• Share one or two examples of each

Impact……

• What impact have these changes had on your ministry?• In how you relate to your parishioners?• In how you relate to other staff?

• Are they positive? Negative??? Or ?????

Impact……Talk about one “thing” you are doing to positively manage your:

•Professional Boundaries

•Your Electronic Boundaries• For yourself• For your congregation

Guidelines – some ideas

• Expectations –what is Professional vs. Personal communication? • Time –when am I communicating electronically?• Access- what needs to be dealt with now vs.

waiting? • Feedback/Non- verbal- what needs to be done

in person?• What else??

Guidelines –Next steps…..

• Do I have a set of “guidelines” I use when communicating by email/texting/other electronic forms?• Does our church/staff have guidelines for

youth and lay leaders to use?•What will I do when I go back to my

congregation/ministry setting with the discussion from today?

Thanks!

Rick Loseth, LICSWPACT for Families Collaborative320-231-7030 ext. 2976 rick_l@pactforfamilies.org