Keys for Healthy Communication Jennifer Sho… · Keys for Healthy Communication with Jennifer...

Keys for Healthy Communication

with Jennifer WelchHypnotherapist, Cellular Release Therapist, Embodiment Practitioner,

and Specialist with The Gabriel Method

Do you eat to stuff your emotions?

If you eat to stuff your emotions, you

might be struggling with communication

difficulties!

For today’s show, you’ll need§ A comfortable place to be

§ Your journal and a pen or pencil for some notes

§ Water or tea

Why is healthy communication Important?

§ Communication (which includes our words, body language, and energy) is the bridge that allows for connection between yourself and others

§ Communication is the basis of every single relationship you have, even with yourself!!!

§ Communication challenges are the number one cause of relationship distress

Why is healthy communication Important? (contd)

§ When ineffective communication occurs, at least one person in the relationship feels they are not being heard

§ This can have eroding effects and always results in an imbalance of power

§ Typically, people have

difficulty with communication

because they are afraid to

verbalize what they are

feeling, they blame others or

they have difficulty hearing

what others are saying

Why do people have difficulty communicating?

§ Don’t really know what we are feeling

§ Judge what we are feeling; we invalidate what we feel or judge it to be wrong or bad

§ Afraid of an adverse reaction to what is being communicated (being yelled at, shamed, put down, disregarded, etc….)

Three reasons for having difficulty verbalizing how we feel:

Ways we can distance those we are speaking to

§ Blame others

§ Project ideas onto others – making assumptions as to what others are thinking or why they are doing certain things

§ Projection usually happens when there is something about ourselves we find unacceptable, and we attribute it to another person

§ Examples:

§ Fearing a partner will cheat is often a reflection of how one views his/herself

§ Parents who have not achieved their goals and demand their child/children succeed

What is Projection?

When you focus on what the other person is doing – not on yourself,

you create defensiveness and separation. Change the “You” to “I” and you invite more listening and

cooperation.

§ We have to let go of blame – of ourselves and others!

§ We must take responsibility for our emotions and ourselves and allow others to do the same

In order for healthy, clear communication

§ Go within, take a few moments to think about the current situation

§ Take some time to go within and get clear with yourself about how you are feeling about what is going on.

§ Do this without projection or blame of yourself or anyone else.

§ Use “I” language

§ I am feeling ____________ or

§ I feel _________________

Exercise - Steps to Direct, Clear Communication

§ Practice saying, “This isn’t about you, it’s about me. I don’t want you to do anything differently. I just need to tell you how I feel. I feel ________ when _______________.

I know this is your style and I am trying to understand. But for now, I need to tell you how I feel.”

Steps to Direct, Clear Communication

§ Practice listening to others as the vast blue sky

– not to respond or defend, but to actually hear

what the other person is saying.

Steps to Direct, Clear Communication

§ Healthy communication is a skill that can be learned.

§ It begins with you listening to yourself and being honest with how you feel and what you want.

The way we communicate with others and with ourselves

ultimately determines the quality of our lives.

~Anthony Robbins

Communication is the fuel that keeps the fire of your relationship

burning. Without it, your relationship goes cold.

~William Paisley

You are the brilliance of the Universe!

Keys for Healthy Communication

with Jennifer WelchTherapist, Embodiment Practitioner, and Specialist with

The Gabriel Method